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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/25435267">Full Moon</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheOneWhoStayed/pseuds/TheOneWhoStayed'>TheOneWhoStayed</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Dark and Light [The Sound of Grey] [2]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Twilight Series - All Media Types</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Age Difference, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, BAMF Bella Swan, Bella reacts like a normal person to people sneaking into her windows, Canon Rewrite, Canon-Typical Violence, Charlie finds out, Charlie is a Good Dad, Coven Dynamics, Developing Relationship, F/M, Gen, Hindsight is 20-20, I just realized Bella is a mess too, Jacob is an idiot, Justice For Leah, Justice For Rosalie, Lauren Mallory is a bomb bitch, Lauren Mallory is also a mess, Loss of Virginity, Maybe the real therapy is the children we adopted along the way, Non-Explicit Sex, Older Man/Younger Woman, Oops, Relationship Negotiation, Renee is a bad mom, Sam is a tired dad, Secret Relationship, Shapeshifting, Soul Bond, The Birthday Party is much more horrific than was planned, Vampire Turning, Wolf Pack, in late chapters, no beta we die like men, themes of fate</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-07-22</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-08-23</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-18 07:29:02</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Mature</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>31</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>178,966</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/25435267</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheOneWhoStayed/pseuds/TheOneWhoStayed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>It started with her 18th birthday party and went all down hill from there.<br/>Between Carlisle not wanting to move forward until Charlie knew about them, Jacob's newfound flakyness, and, most importantly, Alice's vision of Bella being attacked off a forest road, life didn't seem content to leave her be.<br/>But Bella has fought for her home before and she'll do everything she can to keep it. </p><p>[The New Moon Rewrite that is nothing like New Moon at all so I called it the opposite.]</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Carlisle Cullen/Bella Swan, Leah Clearwater &amp; Bella Swan</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Dark and Light [The Sound of Grey] [2]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1820770</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>943</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>552</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Chapter 1</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Hi, welcome back to Noah has no idea what they're doing but having a good time anyways.</p><p>I want to give you realistic expectation for this, BECAUSE it's a middle part, it's about as exciting action wise as New Moon [meaning not at all really]<br/>BUT it's also nothing at all like New Moon regarding the plot involving the Cullen family so make of that what you will....</p><p>I'm-</p><p>I'm just here writing whatever I want. Sorry if it's not what you were hoping for or expecting....</p><p>Regardless of if you have expectations or not, I hope you enjoy this anyways.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>She was staring at herself.</p><p>Bella was not one for vanity or useless self examination but there was something off about the face which stared back at her.</p><p>Her eye were the color of daffodils in the height of spring, her hair a deep mahogany, stark against the snowy landscape. Bella stood on what appeared to be a frozen lake as dawn broke over the mountains.</p><p>Nothing seemed out of place as she continued to examine her features, wearing only a thin shirt and jeans, she did not feel the cold. How could she? Why would the cold bother her?</p><p>Was it supposed to?</p><p>There was a light surrealism to the moment as she stared at her face and felt disconnected from it somehow.</p><p>Strong arms wrapped around her which caused Bella to pull her attention from the puzzling sight of her reflection only to find Carlisle nuzzling her cheek as he sighed, "How long is forever?"</p><p>"Sometimes, just one second," Bella couldn't help herself as she quoted Alice in Wonderland as the rather whimsical moment took her fully. There was no explanation for why the feeling of wrong footedness wouldn't leave her. All she wanted was to enjoy the moment with Carlisle.</p><p>As the sun crested over the mountains, rays of brilliant light burst forth and landed on them. Just as she knew it would, Carlisle's skin began to refract the rays like a million tiny flames bursting into life across his face.</p><p>Reaching out, Bella couldn't help but touch him.</p><p>Her breath caught as she did.</p><p>The hand which she'd stretched forth to cradle the man's face, was her's and yet it too shone like a million diamond were encrusted in her skin.</p><p>"I do believe I'll never become accustomed to how radiant you are in the sun," Carlisle caressed her cheek and Bella could feel it. As if the moment would never end.</p><p>How long was forever indeed.</p><p>Stretching up, she made to kiss him then-</p><p>WHAM!</p><p>Bolting upright Bella gasped for air at the sudden noise that had her heart racing.</p><p>"Sorry!" Charlie called out and Bella suddenly felt the weight of grogginess that came from such a sudden wake up call.</p><p>Instead of being surrounded by ice and snow, she was very firmly ensconced in her sinfully comfy bed as the sunlight was trickling over her signaling the beginning of the day.</p><p>Hair wild and still mousy brown with rather nasty bits of red, Bella sighed as she stared at her left arm. The only bit of her that in any way resembled her dream was the crescent shape scar that Carlisle's venom had left when he sealed up her wound from Jame's attack.</p><p>Even so, her dream had been the nicest one she'd had in a very long while, most nights she'd been tossing an turning, lucky to get a few hours rest. That one though? Bella couldn't help but allow herself a smile which was no doubt addled by her sleep fogged expression.</p><p>"Are you alright?" Bella forced herself to call out to her father, as she did a yawn escaped her throat,forcing her to cover her mouth slightly. The covers were toasty and she sighed as she knew what had to be done.</p><p>"Yeah just dropped some stuff," Charlie sounded only a little miffed and Bella determined that if it was important he'd be more upset.</p><p>So, like a particularly nasty band-aid, Bella tore herself free of her comforter and groaned at the sudden temperature shift. She then leapt to her feet and shut her curtains completely. With that done she could change and ready herself for the day.</p><p>Absently she noted the calendar on her wall.</p><p>September 13th, it was a Tuesday, but a very special Tuesday.</p><p>A smile began to creep it's way onto her face once more as she considered what it all meant. It felt like baby steps but they were steps nonetheless.</p><p>Quickly she rushed across the hall to the bathroom in order to take a quick shower. Warm water eased her into wakefulness as Bella slowly washed her long hair. By the time she'd scrubbed herself down and wrapped a towel around herself, she knew that Alice was likely going to be banging down her door in less than an hour.</p><p>So, Bella hobbled back across the hall carefully, nearly slipping but catching herself at the last minute, before starting the harrowing task of completely drying herself off.</p><p>Winter in Forks mean more snow than a penguin knew what to do with, which also meant that Bella would likely crack her head opened sooner rather than later, much to her chagrin. After all, it felt like she'd only just gotten the all clear from Dr. Gerandy.</p><p>As she finished drying her hair her phone began to ring which caused Bella to smile as the ringtone blared out.</p><p>Always having time for the particular caller, she shut off her blow dryer and flipped her phone opened only to press it to her ear and greet,</p><p>"Doctor Doctor give me the news."</p><p>"I've got a bad case of loving you," Carlisle replied in song and it sounded like he was holding back a laugh. Bella couldn't help it. Her heart was fluttering like she was a little girl again and Renee had just gifted her ballet lessons.</p><p>"Please tell me you're at home and not in the middle of the hospital break room singing Robert Palmer," Bella couldn't help the laugh that bubbled out of her at his willingness to play along with her rather odd case of giddiness.</p><p>"I am actually sitting in the parking lot of a very lovely jewelry store that I feared would not have a particular piece ready for today."</p><p>"Any news on whether or not the world is ending and Alice has decided to listen and let you be the only one to get me something?" Bella asked cheerily as she began to dig through her closet for suitable clothes for the chilly weather outside.</p><p>She had taken to wearing more long sleeves to hide her scar, as it was rather conspicuous in the sunlight and so was only wearing long sleeves on the sunniest days.</p><p>"You know, she only ignores you because you never scold her," Carlisle replied easily as they discussed his daughter,</p><p>"It makes all of them quite jealous that they aren't permitted to give you something. Naturally it breeds rebellion."</p><p>"Tell them to hold off until mother's day," Bella replied facetiously with a small laugh as she pulled one of the shirts the girl in question had gifted to her as well as a comfy pair of jeans.</p><p>He actually laughed then, "I suppose she should be glad that she's even being allowed to throw you a small party."</p><p>"Well it's something to celebrate," Bella informed him, her heart swelling once more at the reminder of what day it truly was,</p><p>"I'm one year closer to forever with you."</p><p>"Isabella," Carlisle's tone was soft and full clear affection, "I love you very much and I've waited a very long time to find you, so you must know that I feel it's already begun."</p><p>Pressing her lips together to prevent herself from smiling like an actual loon in the middle of her room while she was wearing only a towel, Bella couldn't help but squirm a bit giddily,</p><p>"I love you too."</p><p>They had said the words for the first time as he held her that night, still wearing her prom dress, and it still felt like they were precious every time Bella spoke them.</p><p>"But?"</p><p>"But," Bella chuckled lightly at his prompt, "I'm very impatient and we haven't even gone on a real date yet."</p><p>"You've just turned 18," Carlisle reminded her soothingly and Bella was so tired of slow. Her heart had been crying out for him every night since he'd kissed her like a man eager to consume her completely.</p><p>Then he'd not kissed her again.</p><p>He wouldn't dare.</p><p>"We have time," Bella finished for him, the words he'd kept telling her each time she'd voiced her eagerness to trudge ahead with their relationship. He was right of course, she was simply enthusiastic and overwhelmed with all the love that was piling in her.</p><p>The heart in her chest that was not her own weighed heavily whenever it was away from him, to the point that in the dead of night it ached and caused her to thrash and be unable to sleep. Bella had resolved to tell him soon, but she wasn't sure how.</p><p>Carlisle was keeping his distance in an attempt to respect her, he was nearly 400 and physically 23. It was enough for him to feel the need for distance until Bella was no longer under the age of majority.</p><p>"I have to go," Bella regretted the need to end the call on such a somber tone, "Alice will be here any second and I'm still not dressed."</p><p>"Isabella, I do love you," He repeated the words, and Bella felt them in her bones as he continued, "Be careful and have a lovely day."</p><p>"It won't be anything close to lovely until I'm safely hidden away in your book horde," she teased lightly,</p><p>"And you better have a good day too. No loitering outside of jewelry shops and flirting with the daughters of public figures."</p><p>"I promise nothing," Carlisle was happy to joke right back causing Bella to roll her eyes and hang up the phone before letting out a long sigh.</p><p>Reminding herself that it was just another day, Bella began pulling her clothes for school on. By the time she was finished she had only enough time to make herself a quick scrambled egg burrito before Alice's sun fire yellow Porsche pulled up to the curb just outside as Bella served herself a small glass of orange juice.</p><p>Charlie had left while Bella was showering so the only vehicle in the driveway was her truck. Thus, Alice was happy to block the whole driveway before hopping out of the car, not even opening the door which was only possible because she'd apparently removed the hard top for the day.</p><p>Bella moved only to unlock the door and wandered back to the kitchen and took a drink of her juice. As she did so Alice entered the house without preamble.</p><p>"Nice to know it's not going to snow or rain today," Bella observed in lieu of a greeting because that wasn't their morning style.</p><p>"Forty percent schmorty percent," Alice rolled her eyes playfully, "I'm more reliable than Al Roker."</p><p>Taking another drink of her orange juice, Bella leaned against the counter and did her level best to pretend that she wasn't impressed with Alice's foresight. The other girl's Vampiric Gift came in handy in a myriad of ways and they were all lucky the tiny 4 foot 10 girl wasn't the kind to seek world domination.</p><p>"Well, when the weather decides to suddenly change it's mind I have an umbrella in my backpack," Bella joked easily about the choice based nature of her power, Alice of course didn't dignify the statement with a response before she rocked back on her heels.</p><p>"Your present is in the car! I know you'll love it so you can't complain that I got it!"</p><p>"Alice," Bella groaned as she finished off her breakfast, "I have half a mind to torture you and toss it out of the car.</p><p>"But, because I love you and know you're just being difficult because you think you'll only be able to bully me for so long, I'll accept it."</p><p>"You only have 5 more birthdays left," Alice informed her rather petulantly as Bella pushed herself off the counter, grabbed her bag and began making her way out of the house. Alice followed obediently and didn't have to be reminded to lock the door,</p><p>"And don't think I didn't see your conversation with Carlisle earlier! Honestly! Mother's day!"</p><p>Bella just smiled widely at the Vampire as she pulled the passenger side door opened before climbing in,</p><p>"Only every 10 years though. And no car unless it's more than 10 years old, no European models, and it has to be black or grey."</p><p>Alice smirked mischievously before starting her car, "Then I have the perfect gift for next year."</p><p>Bella suddenly felt nervous at the girl's excited tone and her dread was proved justifiable as Alice pulled away from the curb declaring, "You'd look gorgeous in a charcoal grey 67' Shelby GT 500 Mustang."</p><p>"I was so eager to put you down that I for a moment lived in a world where people didn't love classic american muscle cars," Bella moaned as Alice only cackled like a witch while pushing the speed limit for the residential area.</p><p>As Bella seemed to always be driven to school by either Alice and Jasper, or Edward, no one even gave a second glance at the two girls as they climbed out of the car together. The only member of the student body who cared at all was Jasper who rather patiently leaned against Edward's silver Volvo.</p><p>The Empath offered Bella a smile before he greeted his Mate with a peck on the lips, then proceeded to take her hand. Notably his eyes were fully black, which meant he'd likely starved himself for a challenging day.</p><p>"You ready for today?" Jasper asked warily and Bella suddenly felt nervous.</p><p>"What, has Jessica finally decided to execute the hit?"</p><p>Bella hadn't ever done the damage control from that day in the parking lot and wasn't exactly inclined to. in response to her blase words, Jasper shook his head as he chuckled, but he and Alice didn't start walking until Bella herself began making her way towards the main building.</p><p>She was beginning to get used to their socially deferential behavior.</p><p>Ever since the incident with James, her trio of loyal guards and friends really began putting themselves to work letting anyone who knew what to look for that she was in charge. Bella was still trying to wrap her head around it fully, but she was growing accustomed to it.</p><p>As they entered the cafeteria their trio joined Edward at the usual table as he very slowly stirred what looked like a substance masquerading as oatmeal in a tiny foam bowl. On the tray alongside the mush were 2 sad triangles of toast and a sealed dole fruit cup.</p><p>Emmett and Rosalie had graduated the year before and were supposed to be 'taking a year off before college' which was code for planning their next honeymoon get away.</p><p>"You know I'm beginning to see why you make your own breakfast at home," Edward greeted without preambled as Bella situated herself next to him.</p><p>"How many years have you been in the public school system and you're just now realizing?" Bella asked brightly not even bothering to hide her daring tone in regards to his actual age.</p><p>"Keep it up and I'll start reciting Shakespeare to you in the middle of English," the copper haired boy snarked right back and Bella only let her grin grow wider. They were starting Romeo and Juliet and while Edward was well read, it was more from as sense of 'why not' than actual passion for literature.</p><p>"I will have such revenges on you both, That all the world shall--I will do such things,-- What they are, yet I know not: but they shall be The terrors of the earth," Bella quoted dramatically and caused Jasper to snort from his place next to Alice.</p><p>"You're absolutely insane," Edward informed her reasonably. She accepted that judgment. If being able to quote King Lear made her insane then she was happier for it.</p><p>Bella then turned to Jasper and said in a low voice, "By the way Chuckles, I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to be breathing right now."</p><p>Jasper ducked his head into Alice's neck and made no reply as he only smiled widely at Bella's teasing. Apparently he was content to have his Mate speak for him, "He'll be fine! You don't need to worry about him today."</p><p>Accepting that with a nod Bella stole the fruit cup off Edward's tray before peeling it opened and using her fingers to pick out various bits of fruit, making sure to avoid the cherries. Bella ignored Edward's incessant giggling at her actions but she wasn't about to let the only decent part of his breakfast go to waste.</p><p>Finally though as Bella cleaned her hand with a sanitary wipe from the small pack she kept in her bag, because you kept those kind of things on you when you were prone to injury, the bell signalling the start of the day sounded.</p><p>"See you in English," Edward hoped to his feet and as Alice and Jasper too began their trek to the Science building Bella sighed,</p><p>"If Jessica even looks at me today I think I'm quitting."</p><p>"You can't quit school Bella," Alice shouted over her shoulder indulgently and if Bella was a lesser person she'd have rolled her eyes at the blatant display of Vampire hearing.</p><p>"She's right though," Edward shrugged and Bella knew her opinion on the matter must have been showing on her face.</p><p>In the end when Bella did get to her AP World History class, Jessica did look at her a bit sketchily as Mike just looked like he wished he was anywhere but in the same room as the two girls. Bella knew perfectly well that she was in the wrong for throwing a tantrum that day in the parking lot.</p><p>But she couldn't find it in her to apologize for getting angry for being called a liar for the millionth time.</p><p>Sometimes that's just how 'sorta-not-really -friendships' ended.</p><p>You just couldn't put up with anymore nonsense.</p><p>Her only sympathies were for Angela, the poor girl was caught in the divorce between loyalty to her long time friendship with Jessica and whatever Bella and her had been starting. Clearly Angela had hoped they'd make up, but Bella was sticking to her guns. Content to have Jacob as her only human friend despite Alice's opinions.</p><p>Being a senior though, Bella was fortunate that she had a half schedule so she didn't actually need to eat lunch at the cafeteria. Instead, Alice would drive her home and Bella would hop into her truck and head straight to Newton's Outfitters after school for a part time shift.</p><p>As promised, she'd gotten the job over summer so that she could save money for a junker that her and Jacob could fix up together. She was close to her goal so the next time Bella saw him they'd likely start talking about what they actually wanted their project to be.</p><p>So, as she entered AP English and settled into the seat next to Edward, Bella was surprised and a bit apprehensive as Mike moseyed up to them. Mike Newton was still, supposedly blissfully, dating Jessica so he had no reason to be talking to either Bella or Edward.</p><p>"Hey, Bella!" Mike greeted a bit lamely, there was a modicum of nerves to his tone as he glanced at Edward as if the other boy was going to go for his jugular. Which, to be fair, Edward was a Vampire.</p><p>But Mike didn't know that, he was just being weird like everyone else about Bella's friendship with him.</p><p>"Hey Mike, you need something?" Bella replied easily as she tried her best to absorb Edward's telepathy and suss out why Mike was talking to her in the first place.</p><p>Of course, Edward was no help as he just sat there, smiling, like the useless future step son he was.</p><p>"Yeah um.." the boy kept giving Edward extremely obvious side glances, "We were um.. Putting a group together for the movies and Tyler thought you'd like to come y'know.</p><p>"I mean, Jess will be there and I thought it would be cool for you guys to uh.. spend time together again. Y'know she misses hanging out."</p><p>"This is the same Tyler Crowley with the van, the one that almost hit her last year?" Edward spoke up and Bella wished for once in her life that he'd not- JUST NOT feel like he needed to be protective and jealous in his father's stead.</p><p>"Yeah," Mike replied and it sounded like half of the word had gotten stuck on it's way out of his throat, "It's for next Thursday."</p><p>Before Bella could answer with a succinct no thanks, the brat next to her pretending to be a self respecting Vampire declared, "Next Thursdays a no go, Carlisle's teaching her how to play chess."</p><p>Bella closed her eyes and willed herself not to actually lose her mind right then and there. it seemed both Alice and Edward had no idea what the hell the word discreet meant. Taking a breath she said,</p><p>"No thanks, I don't really have anything to say to Jessica."</p><p>Mike nodded awkwardly and turned on his heel before beating a hasty retreat to his desk that was positioned right next to Eric Yorkie. Eric clearly wanted to know how it went as he began harassing his friend while sending looks over to Bella and Edward's location.</p><p>"He didn't even think about inviting me too," Edward declared quietly and Bella wondered how his mind worked because forget a different century, Edward had to be from a different planet.</p><p>"Sometimes, people don't like when you're rude to them and always bring your very single father up in conversations about your red blooded female classmate," Bella hissed through her teeth as quietly as she could manage.</p><p>She was glad.</p><p>No.</p><p>Ecstatic to find herself working with Mr. Newton instead of Mike that day.</p><p> </p>
<hr/><p> </p><p>Alice's present had been very persistently handed off to Bella when the tiny Vampire girl had dropped her off before her shift at Newton's.</p><p>So the white box sat wrapped with only a silky blue bow.</p><p>Bella ignored it when she got ready for work and tried her best not to think about it in the small window she had after work where she made Charlie's spinach spaghetti dinner.</p><p>When Charlie did get home, it was to Bella eating her plate of food and trying her best not to think about opening the damn box ever but knowing she was going to because it was clearly clothes. That's what Alice did.</p><p>She bought clothes.</p><p>"You're about to stare a hole right through the table," Charlie observed as he peeled off his jacket for work,</p><p>"What did it ever do to you?"</p><p>"I think it's conspiring with Alice to replace my wardrobe," Bella replied with a frown, determined not to look at her father and give away that she was actually nervous about the dress that Alice had probably chosen with Carlisle's viewing pleasure in mind,</p><p>"We'll have to get rid of it I think."</p><p>Charlie snorted and shook his head, under his breath he said something about not understanding her brain,</p><p>"You going somewhere then?"</p><p>Bella finally gave him her full attention and realized he was referring to her very early dinner, "Yeah, Edward's picking me up for a small party at their place."</p><p>"That reminds me!" Charlie suddenly perked up, "Your mother and I got you a gift, give me a second and I'll bring it down."</p><p>Filling her cheeks with air Bella slowly let it out like a deflating balloon as her father rushed up the stairs to get whatever object he and Renee had impossibly agreed on.</p><p>Finishing her spaghetti, Bella moved to the kitchen and it was while she was in the middle of washing her plate that Charlie came bounding back down the stairs wearing a dazzling smile. Once she couldn't help but mirror as she caught sight of what was in his hands.</p><p>There was two boxes, one was larger than the other length wise but they went together like peaches and cream.</p><p>"It's a camera," Bella sighed as she dried her hands on a dish towel before making her way over to the counter where her dad had proudly plopped her presents down,</p><p>"And a printer for it."</p><p>"We coordinated," Charlie shrugged, clearly feigning as much nonchalance as he cold muster and Bella was overwhelmed with how good he was. First her truck, then a camera for all the memories of her last year at school, her last year with Charlie before college.</p><p>It spoke to how much the Cullens had changed her as Bella's first reaction was to hug him.</p><p>"Oh!" Charlie exclaimed brightly at the action before wrapping his arms around her in order to return the embrace,</p><p>"This is nice."</p><p>"Thank you so much," Bella sighed and wondered at all the things that camera would see, all the places and years, even long after it's mechanisms stopped working,</p><p>"It's perfect."</p><p>She pulled away then, hoping that things wouldn't be too awkward as Bella sort of eagerly began to unbox her presents. They weren't wrapped but they did have rather cute little bows on them, an attempt at festivity without too much fuss. Exactly how she liked it.</p><p>"What'd you make?" Charlie's tone was a bit strange as he peered into the pot of pasta, "It's green."</p><p>Bella huffed out a laugh, "It's spinach spaghetti, it's better for you."</p><p>"Better for me," Charlie sounded as if he was rolling his eyes as he opened the fridge for his customary after work beer, "I'm barely 40."</p><p>"Which means now's the time to take care of yourself," Bella teased as she broke down the boxes for storage, just in case the devices needed replacing from a fault.</p><p>"Uh-huh," the man was smiling though as he cracked open his can, "What time are you leaving and what time are you coming back?"</p><p>Bella checked the clock and while she was excited to spend an evening with Carlisle she also wanted to play with her new camera,</p><p>"Edward should be here in an hour, and If Alice has her way she'll be kidnapping me for a sleep over."</p><p>"Well tell me if Alice is going to have her way because it's a school night," Charlie didn't seem to bothered by the idea but Bella wasn't going to forget what he'd seen,</p><p>"And I'll only allow it because it's your birthday."</p><p>Giving him a smile Bella replied, "Thank you."</p><p>With that she gathered up her gifts and carefully made her way up the stairs to face the music. Namely whatever dress Alice had thrust upon her.</p><p>Laying out her printer next to her laptop, Bella had the foresight to check the charge on her camera, finding the battery it had come with full, she slipped it into her purse for the party later.</p><p>Then, she eyeballed the box.</p><p>"You're not so scary," she whispered hoping to get herself the courage to look at the thing,</p><p>"You're just a dress that Alice meticulously chose because she saw Carlisle would like it.</p><p>"For my 18th Birthday."</p><p>Instead of feeling brave, Bella was starting to feel nauseous.</p><p>It wasn't like he had a countdown timer and was going to be ready to lay her out and make sweet love to her that very night. Carlisle was far too much of a gentleman to behave so skeevily.</p><p>Knowing him he would only kiss her, perhaps lay with her while she slept and that was it.</p><p>Which was fine.</p><p>Swallowing back her nerves Bella tore the bow of the box off and flipped the lid off like it was a feral animal she was afraid of being mauled by. Of course she was met with just white tissue paper because Alice was fancier than Bella could even conceive.</p><p>"It's just a dress," Bella hated that her heart was pounding like a drum, the place that Carlisle kept in her chest was wild and frantic.</p><p>She wasn't this person.</p><p>So why was she panicking over a dress?!</p><p>Gathering all her might, Bella pulled the white tissue from the box and found herself once more relieved and excited by a birthday gift. It seemed both sides of her family were 2 for 2.</p><p>The dress was empire waisted, a fact Bella only knew because she was a literature nerd who had already chewed through her regency phase. It's neckline was round but it wasn't deep at all, the design of it seemed to drape from one shoulder to the other with small cap like sleeves which flowed as loosely as the skirt portion which appeared as if it would land at Bella's knees.</p><p>A small black belt with a silver butterfly buckle was rolled up inside the box as well.</p><p>Bella was most blown away by the color.</p><p>The fabric was crimson and creamy, and Bella bit her lip at the thought of wearing it with the pair of black ballerina slip ons tucked in the bottom of the package.</p><p>"Alice you're the worst," Bella whispered because she loved it. And wasn't that the worst? To be someone who didn't care much for how you looked because that sort of thing always seemed unreachable. Then to have someone else come along and make it seem so easy?</p><p>But that was Alice and Bella loved her, so she'd accept it.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Chapter 2</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>HI</p><p>I added that tag because Emmett did something I wasn't expecting him to do.... It's standard Vampire stuff but I just felt like I needed to put that tag so be warned.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Having wasted too much time being dramatic, Bella got to work brushing her hair. She'd showered directly after work and so getting ready was mostly going to be refreshing herself and donning the too good to be true dress sitting in the box on her bed.</p><p>Keeping a tight watch on the clock, Bella found herself cutting it close as she slipped on her shoes and grabbed her purse before heading down stairs.</p><p>Charlie was only just starting to eat but he had clearly changed into more comfortable attire as he sat rather casually at the dinner table while he wrangled some of the spaghetti on his plate and said,</p><p>"You look pretty fancy for a 'small party'."</p><p>"Alice," Bella informed him a bit shyly, feeling like a million bucks in the delicate little thing that she'd been so terrified of just under an hour ago. Suddenly her phone beeped, signalling a text and Bella frowned in mild confusion as the message had come from Alice and if anyone should be texting her it was Edward who was scheduled to be her ride.</p><p>Even stranger was the fact that the message consisted of a simple, "Have fun."</p><p>"I thought Edward was picking you up," Charlie's tone was questioning in the worst sort of way as Bella turned her attention towards him and away from her phone.</p><p>"He's supposed to be."</p><p>Charlie was no longer sitting, his plate practically forgotten as he looked out the window from the nook that the dinning table was situated in. Bella followed his gaze outside only to find, not Edward's silver Volvo which had driven her to school a myriad of times, but a familiar black Mercedes that had her heart beating a mile a minute.</p><p>"Well that's not his car," Charlie informed her incredulously. He likely knew exactly who owned that car, Carlisle worked closely with the police on occasion as he frequently served as their coroner.</p><p>Bella's heart was hot like molten lava at the thought that Carlisle had actually come to pick her up. All the while there was an actual boulder that landed in her stomach as Charlie looked at her expectantly for an explanation on why Dr. Cullen, father of 5, was idling on the curb while she was practically dressed for a night of wining and dining.</p><p>"Maybe he broke down," Bella tried a bit lost on how to proceed in the situation, that was until Charlie suddenly announced,</p><p>"Well I'll walk you outside then."</p><p>Bella knew Alice had to have seen this, there was no way Charlie wasn't going to wonder what the hell was going on if Carlisle came to pick her up in his car. Not after that day in the hospital at Phoenix and those months of questioning glances.</p><p>So, putting faith in her family she just smiled and trudged out the door with as much confidence as she could. Charlie followed casually, his opened plaid shirt and blue jeans a strange contrast next to what Bella knew had to be a designer dress.</p><p>The driver's side of the car opened and Bella couldn't help but grin at the slyness of it all as Edward's copper head popped out over the hood as he smiled winningly wearing a black suit and tie,</p><p>"You're gonna have to get in the back little lady I'm playing chauffeur tonight."</p><p>Then, he added on as if he'd forgotten that Bella still had a father to answer to, "Good evening Chief Swan."</p><p>"Evening Edward," Charlie nodded and pushed his hands into his pockets. He didn't seem too bothered by the turn of events, probably relieved.</p><p>As for Bella, she raised an eyebrow at her friend, not quite sure what the plan was because the last time she checked there was absolutely no reason for him to be driving that particular car unless it was some sort of signal. A theory which held as the pulsing in her chest was slowly seeping through her whole body,</p><p>"I'm not getting into the back seat."</p><p>"You have to cause your cake is in the front and I don't want you to see it," Edward admitted plainly. An answer which had Bell really hoping it was one of those tiny cakes that you could only get about 4 slices out of at most.</p><p>Knowing any further resistance would give up the game, Bella shook her head before turning back to her father, "Bye dad, I'll call you later alright?"</p><p>Charlie nodded and offered the same 'good nights as he remained just off the porch in order to see her off.</p><p>As Bella expected from the persistent aggressive heat in her chest, when she very quickly hopped into the back seat of the Mercedes whose windows were tinted impossible black, tucked just out of sight of the rear passenger side door sat Carlisle Cullen.</p><p>Bella smiled because it was her birthday, Edward was pulling away from her house sedately as a show for her dad, and Carlisle Cullen was sitting next to her in the finest suit she'd ever seen in her life. His eyes sparkling brighter than the purest of golden ore while they honey blond hair on his head was swept back and to the side almost messily.</p><p>"You're much better than a penguin," Bella announced breathlessly which caused Edward to snort and Carlisle to lean towards her, only to reach out his hand in the direction of the delicate buckle on her belt. The action was fragile and precariously close to touching her in a way he hadn't yet dared, but his carefulness held.</p><p>Only the silver buckle was lightly tapped, "And you are much more beautiful than than any butterfly."</p><p>Carlisle then closed the distance between them as he placed a chaste kiss on her lips causing Bella to sigh into it for the few seconds it lasted.</p><p>"Tell me we're actually going to your house," Bella said as they pulled apart, the brief meeting of their lips wasn't enough but it would have to do as she didn't want an audience for anything too passionate,</p><p>"Because I'm making a new rule right now that you have to tell me when 'sleep over' is actually a code for romantic stolen moments."</p><p>"We are actually going to my home," Carlisle chuckled but took the opportunity to brush a stray hair from her face with his cold fingers,</p><p>"I simply couldn't wait any longer to see you, and may I say that I am glad that I was so impatient. Isabella you look positively stunning tonight."</p><p>"That's all Alice," Bella ducked her head as she felt heat rising to her cheeks. Carlisle's reply didn't help her though as he rather assuredly said,</p><p>"I'm not referring to the dress."</p><p>She had nothing to say to that but to kiss him for herself which Carlisle welcomed a little too eagerly.</p><p>They apparently allowed themselves too long to enjoy the feel of their lips moving together as the moment was interrupted by their driver clearing his throat a bit stiffly. No doubt a bit weirded out by the fact that he could hear ever little thing Carlisle was thinking in that moment.</p><p>Bella pulled away a bit embarrassed by Edward's interruption her stomach turning in the best of ways, Carlisle's eyes appeared to almost glow with his amusement at his son's reaction to them.</p><p>"Happy birthday Isabella," Carlisle said the words with such a tone of reverence Bella's heart began to ache as he reached into his coat. She watched excitedly realizing that he was about to give her whatever gift he'd procured from the jewelry shop that morning.</p><p>Slowly, the Vampire lifted a small grey hinged jewelry box from his blazer. It was a square roughly 9 inches or so, the box itself was thin though and his long slender fingers cradled it like a dear treasure.</p><p>Then, as he had the bottom of the box fully in once hand, Carlisle used the other to pop it opened to reveal it's contents.</p><p>3 for 3.</p><p>That's how good her family was.</p><p>Apparently this was what everyone else in the world went through on their birthdays instead of the constant disappointment of detached presents with little meaning, they got blown away each time their loved one revealed how well they knew them.</p><p>Bella felt almost like she was a lying cad who didn't deserve the necklace inside that grey box with a black velvet lining.</p><p>The chain was some sort of silver, delicate and small in a way she was almost afraid to touch it lest it break, but that wasn't why she was fighting back the sudden sting of tears in her eyes.</p><p>It was the pendant that did it.</p><p>"Polaris," Bella knew the word came out ugly and a bit garbled as her emotions welled up and she remembered that night where Carlisle danced with her to no music.</p><p>"You are my north star," He smiled gently and Bella wished she could kiss him again without Edward interrupting instead she reached out reverently and cradled the gift with all due wonder.</p><p>It was truly the north star but it was made what had to be a dozen tiny diamonds set in the same type of metal the chain was likely crafted from.</p><p>"It's beautiful," Bella swallowed back her wonder at the man who had apparently ordered this for her, had waited outside the jewelers until it was ready,</p><p>"Carlisle it's too much."</p><p>"I don't feel so," Carlisle placed a gently hand under her chin, guiding her eyes to his own and what Bella saw reminded her that the feeling inside of her was returned equally within his own heart.</p><p>"Did I not tell you that I love you as the sun loves the stars?"</p><p>"I wish I had something to give you, I mean...." Bella chuckled a bit stupidly but he waited patiently for her to gather her words. She tried to do it quickly as Edward had just pulled the car onto the forest drive,</p><p>"I know it's my birthday but I could never repay this kind of gift, not even if I tried."</p><p>Carlisle ducked his head as if he was embarrassed, and Bella somehow knew that if he was human he'd be blushing,</p><p>"Isabella, you are my greatest gift. All my life up until now I have striven to deserve you and now that I have you I will continue striving to be a man worthy of someone as good and caring as you have proved yourself to be.</p><p>"This is but a small token to repay you for the wonder of your love which you've seen fit to bestow upon me and my children."</p><p>"Carlisle," Bella shook her head and closed the box as she placed it in her lap, grateful that Edward was kind enough not even to breath in case it interrupted their conversation,</p><p>"It's not exactly hard to love all of you. If anything I should be thanking you all for letting me."</p><p>"We're quite the pair aren't we? I never thought I'd find anyone like you," Carlisle chuckled softly and Bella could see what he meant as she thought on the conversation they'd just had. Both so sure they were undeserving of the other and while Bella knew he had to be blinded by the years he'd spent waiting, she was selfish enough to take his heart for herself.</p><p>But perhaps she was blinded too? By her own lack of experience and even, as cliche as it sounded, the fact that she was so fully and completely in love.</p><p>"He is more myself than I am," Bella whispered brightly as she realized that perhaps that was what it was. They were simply two idiots who didn't think they deserved even someone who was basically like them,</p><p>"Whatever our souls are made of, his and mine are the same."</p><p>"Indeed they are," Carlisle agreed with equal quiet, and Edward pulled into the clearing which housed the Cullen's home. Ending the moment but not the understanding that had formed between them.</p><hr/><p>Carlisle, of course, opened her door for her before Bella could even consider getting out and once she was on both of her feet, the man took her hand gently before the couple began walking towards the house. Edward continued driving so that he could park the Mercedes back into it's place in the garage.</p><p>Halfway to the house Bella realized that she was still a bit uselessly carrying her present and asked Carlisle to assist her in putting it on. A task that he performed admirably as Belle tried not to enjoy the light touched of his smooth chilled fingers on the back of her neck.</p><p>Once the necklace was in place, he took her hand anew and they made their way up the steps on the deck before entering the house.</p><p>From outside, due to the wide glass windows which made up the walls of the living room which faced out towards the forest, Bella could already tell that there were some lights strung up in the living room.</p><p>What she wasn't expecting though was all the Cullens, even Rosalie and Emmett, to be ready to greet her around the base of the stairs just off the entryway. Every single one of them were dressed formally as if it the party was some great affair and Bella hoped that Alice hadn't hassled her siblings too much as they all cheered in unison,</p><p>"Happy Birthday Bella!"</p><p>And as promised, Edward produced the tiniest cake Bella had ever seen.</p><p>It was easily only a couple of servings and had to be roughly 6x6 inches, but it was fully frosted with at least two layers. The the tiny creation was fully white with bunched ribbon edging framing the top and bottom sides, completed by roses on the face of it which cradled a novelty candle in the shape of the number 18.</p><p>The wick flickering with a delicate flame.</p><p>She couldn't help it. So full of affection for them Bella laughed, it was more of a chortle than anything as she covered her mouth and suddenly felt like the world was quiet.</p><p>Never had she ever enjoyed celebrating her birthday. Every year it consisted of her being forced to invite people she didn't actually know all that well from her class only to receive gifts that were clearly more perfunctory than anything. How could they not be? She hardly had anything resembling friends and Jacob wasn't close enough to her to be flying to Arizona every year. Finally when she was around 13 she demanded that she no longer be forced to have a party and Renee agreed so long as she was still allowed to give her something.</p><p>So when Alice had declared she was throwing a party, Bella had been ready to grin an bear it for the Cullen's sakes. She agreed that her aging was a good thing, the older she was, the closer Bella had gotten to being worthy of playing mother as well as truly taking her place in their Coven.</p><p>She hadn't expected them to actually be so wonderful.</p><p>That was her fault, she should have known better.</p><p>Carlisle wrapped an arm around her and lightly stroked her hair as Bella began fighting back tears.</p><p>"Is she alright?" Emmett suddenly piped in and the boy's tone was clearly worried about the scene Bella was creating.</p><p>"She's fine," Jasper whispered, the only one in the entire family who could properly judge with his empathy, "She's just really happy."</p><p>"Jasper's right," Bella forced herself to swallow back her happiness at how subtle the whole affair was aside from the semi formal wardrobe,</p><p>"This is perfect. Thank you guys, really."</p><p>"So are we allowed to give you our presents now?" Emmett asking and Bella gave an incredulous huff as her great mood just shifted to disbelief,</p><p>"If you actually got me something Emmett I'm grounding you."</p><p>"Well, it's from all of us," Edward reasoned as he placed Bella's cake into her hands, Carlisle taking her empty necklace box and tucking it into her purse so that she could.</p><p>Bella looked at Carlisle and raised a single eyebrow, because if he'd been part of this she wasn't going to let it go. Surprisingly though he gave her light shrug as if to say he had no idea.</p><p>"If that's the case..." Bella trailed off as she turned back to the others and nervously chewed her lip, "Let's wait to open it. Since you broke the rules and got me something when I told you not to."</p><p>"Ugh!" Emmett groaned but the others seemed to be nonplussed by the reply as Alice cheerily bounced into the living room,</p><p>"Then let's play some games! Birthday Bella chooses first!"</p><p>"You guys play whatever you want," Bella informed them and brought her tiny cake a bit closer to her face as if examining it with a critical eye,</p><p>"I'm going to eat my cake, and then I'll accept the illegal gift."</p><p>"Catan," Jasper suddenly announced as if he was sniping shotgun which caused Emmett to pout while Edward grinned wildly as if he'd been challenged to a duel,</p><p>"You're on Major."</p><p>"Here we go," Rosalie sounded completely unenthusiastic about the chosen game but settled around the metal framed glass low table in the middle of the living room exactly like the rest of her siblings.</p><p>After gingerly blowing out the candle and making a secret wish, Bella very carefully moved to the love seat which had it's back to the wide glass wall but provided a splendid view of the Cullens' activities within the sitting room. Carlisle joined her sitting close enough to be intimate but not interfere with her plans to eat her tiny cake.</p><p>"Why don't the rest of us just play Mario Party?" Alice offered which had Rosalie quickly moving away from the game that Jasper and Edward were setting up swiftly. Her blonde hair practically flying behind her as she moved to entertainment center in order to set up the Game Cube.</p><p>Emmett too followed suite as he plopped down on the sofa perpendicular to Bella's love seat. As they all began their different methods of entertainment for the first part of the evening, Bella very carefully placed her slice of cake into Carlisle's lap," Hold this"</p><p>"My pleasure," Carlisle commented mildly amused as he brought a hand up to better balance the tiny plate as well as the tiny accompanying fork on his thigh while Bella began digging through her purse. It only took a few moments to find her brand new camera which she'd tucked into on of the inner pockets of the bag.</p><p>"Ta-Da!" She smiled toothily which Carlisle returned with light shake of his head but he was perfectly happy to obey her directions in order for her to get a perfect shot of the precious cake that had been no doubt special ordered for the occasion.</p><p>"I'm never asking where Edward got this cake," Bella informed him as she began flipping through the shots she'd taken on the view finder, happily sharing the screen with him.</p><p>"He would tell you if you asked," Carlisle replied, still holding the desert in question as his eyes scanned the picture being displayed for him.</p><p>"A magician never reveals his secrets and all that," Bella replied as an explanation and Carlisle simply kissed her on the temple as she once more scrolled through to the next picture.</p><p>"I believe this one is my favorite," Carlisle declared and Bella couldn't help but think it was a sappy thing to say as the one he'd picked was of the cake very exquisite being displayed at a small angle while Carlisle held it with both hands over his lap. You could hardly tell it was him, but perhaps that was the notion that made him enjoy it so much.</p><p>"Yeah, it's the clearest," Bella decided right then because liked she about 2 others pretty equally until Carlisle had made his preference known.</p><p>Suddenly she had a daring idea, it was foolish but Bella didn't care how risky it was as she asked,</p><p>"Will you take a picture with me?"</p><p>As he seemed about ready to tell her how reckless the request was, Bella explained, "Holding the cake together."</p><p>"I'll take it!" Alice suddenly shouted from the other side of the living room and Bella wasn't sure if the girl had seen something or had innocently overheard the conversation and was excited for the idea.</p><p>Dropping the pretense that nobody could actually hear the conversation going on between Bella and Carlisle, Emmett paused the game as it was his turn to go while Edward and Jasper halted their aggressive campaigns against each other and began rising to their feet.</p><p>"Apparently I have no choice in the matter," Carlisle teased his prescient daughter but there was not heat in his words as he too got up before offering a hand which Bella took. In a split moment Alice appeared at Bella's side in order to pluck her camera out of the Human girl's grasp.</p><p>"Alright scoot, backs to the wall!" Alice was too excited to not to have seen something and so Bella decided for the optimum picture she'd obey the tiny Vampire girl's instructions.</p><p>Bella turned around and put the low table behind her as Jasper and Edward vacated the vicinity, the brothers happy to stand behind Alice with Emmett as Rosalie simply stood off to the side appearing surprisingly patient.</p><p>Then, Carlisle held the tiny cake with his right hand as Bella took hold of it with her left. With them posing just so, Alice snapped two shots before declaring,</p><p>"Perfect!"</p><p>Suddenly Carlisle picked up the fork and scooped a corner off the treat before offering it to Bella in the most surprising turn of events that had her heart pounding in her ears. It was an action she hadn't thought he'd take and Bella couldn't help the blush that burned it's way across her face as she leaned forwards and ate the bite of cake which Carlisle had presented.</p><p>The vanilla creme frosting combined with a surprising chocolate and raspberry interior hit her tongue and Bella tried to focus on that instead of the fact that Emmett let out a wolf whistle while he clapped his hands as if they'd kissed or something more scandalous.</p><p>Distantly she registered that another picture had been taken but Bella was too busy taking the fork from Carlisle's hand before placing it back on the plate and trying not to make a fool of herself. She then turned to Alice with her palm stretched out,</p><p>"Thank you Alice."</p><p>Alice smiled brightly and handed the camera back with a twinkle in her eye, "You are very welcome!"</p><p>Edward stepped forward with a grin, "You should get that printed and make it a tradition."</p><p>Bella ignored him as she turned on her heel to look up at Carlisle and say something, anything, but it seemed it wasn't to be.</p><p>Instead her foot caught on the carpet and Bella lost her balance, fortunately Carlisle's Vampire speed was sufficient to catch her before she completely fell but Bella manage to hit her leg on the corner of the metal framed low table.</p><p>Her heart was suddenly in her throat as Carlisle released his hold on her and Bella realized that her skin had broken.</p><p>A small trail of warm blood was trickling lightly down her calf.</p><p>"Jasper, it's OK," Bella found herself saying suddenly independent of her own will as she recalled that his eyes had still been black when she entered the home and the blond boy had wished her a happy birthday with the rest of his siblings.</p><p>Time felt heavy as Bella watched helplessly as Jasper roared and lunged from his place next to Alice. Edward, working on instinct alone, shoved her away with a force that had Bella flying back and into the glass table.</p><p>It was like a switch went off behind Carlisle's eyes as he then grabbed Edward by the neck, throwing him bodily at Jasper as a feral rumble ripped from his own chest.</p><p>Bella tried no to move as she was no longer just cut on her leg lightly but glass had embedded itself into the back of her left forearm, the sting of it deep and desperate. Making her feel even more helpless as Emmett grabbed Jasper in a headlock and ripped the boy's head right from his shoulders causing him to collapse like a sack of potatoes. It took everything inside her not to scream at the horrifying sight of Emmett's brutality as he protected her.</p><p>Something like a dagger pierced through Bella as she grit her teeth.</p><p>"Emmett that wasn't necessary!" Alice screeched horrifically as she fell to the ground on her knees next to the body of her Mate.</p><p>"Rosalie I have to get out of here," Emmett said instead of a reply to Alice as he gently laid Jasper's head on the ground. The blonde girl quickly grabbed his hand and tugged, leading him out of the house like a lifeline.</p><p>The imminent danger passed, Carlisle too fell to the ground almost bonelessly as he began to look Bella over to exclusion of everything else.</p><p>"Oh God, Carlisle I'm so sorry," Edward's tone was desperate from his place where he'd apparently holed himself back into the corner where the two wide glass walls met,</p><p>"Bella I didn't mean to-."</p><p>"Get out Edward," Carlisle's tone was emotionless and Bella wanted to reach out to him, but knew that if she did he'd demand she not move or risk getting further injured by the slivers of glass shattered around her,</p><p>"Help Alice and get out."</p><p>Alice was still very gently gathering Jasper's body up as if Bella's blood was nothing to the visceral panic of having the poor boy in pieces. Which Bella understood but had no words to provide comfort with as everything in her was screaming to focus on Carlisle and not let him leave her sights.</p><p>Cautiously, Edward moved towards Alice and did as he was told by delicately picking up the decapitated head of his brother. The boy whispered to his sister quietly before Alice practically followed him blindly carrying Jasper's body towards the woods outside.</p><p>"They'll reassemble him away from the house," Carlisle began speaking with a tinge of worry once his children had all left the room,</p><p>"He won't hurt you."</p><p>"Carlisle, look at me," Bella finally forced out and his golden eyes immediately locked onto her own brown ones. There was such a frantic energy in them that she swallowed back her own anxiety,</p><p>"I'll be fine."</p><p>Instead of smiling he pressed his lips together tightly before giving a very small, singular nod, "Don't move."</p><p>Then Carlisle carefully positioned himself on her right side away from Bella's damaged limb as he placed an arm under her knees and at her back, effectively lifting his Mate completely from the wreckage without jostling her or causing more damage.</p><p>"Well," Bella sighed as he cradled her against himself and began carrying her up the stairs,</p><p>"It was fun while it lasted..."</p><p>Carlisle made a noise that wasn't a laugh, no, his expression seemed as if he was much closer to crying than anything else.</p><p>"Isabella, Jasper almost-"</p><p>He stopped himself and took a breath he didn't need, "Jasper lost control of himself tonight."</p><p>"He was doing a challenge day," Bella reminded him, because there was no way that Carlisle didn't know that, and the poor Vampire didn't need to suffer more than he already had via the vicious way he'd been stopped.</p><p>"And he should have hunted before you arrived," Carlisle countered softly, Bella leaned her head against him.</p><p>"If we keep going it will just end up at me saying that none of this would have happened if I wasn't Human and as Alice was keen to remind me, I still have 5 more birthdays," she replied truthfully, there was no way to avoid accidents, not while she was still fragile with a beating heart.</p><p>Finally they reached his study and he very meticulously placed her onto his desk before grabbing a medical bag he had stored in the corner of the room.</p><p>Carlisle's study was a precious place to her, the walls lined with books and now memories that she'd hoped to forever cradle in her heart long after it stopped beating. She hated seeing him within the walls of it appearing so fragile and terrified as he began setting out what he needed in order to repair her injury.</p><p>Very quietly he came up around the other side of the desk so that he was positioned behind her. Carlisle's cold fingers very tenderly wrapped around her elbow,</p><p>"This is going to sting a bit at first, but I'm going to administer a localized anesthetic so you'll only feel the normal tugging as I remove the debris."</p><p>"You're ignoring me," Bella observed as she felt the needle enter her arm for the anesthetic he warned her about, of course she winced at the sensation and tried not to think too much about it.</p><p>"What would you have me say?" He asked as he began to pluck out the small chunks of glass from her wound, as he did, Carlisle meticulously placed them into a small glass bowl causing them to clink almost delicately.</p><p>"That I'm right," Bella offered not trying to be petulant but truly feeling as if she could be opened with him about the matter,</p><p>"Mistakes are going to happen. I'm Human, you're all Vampires. It's only natural."</p><p>"How can you be so accepting of it?" Carlisle's voice sounded near disbelief, as if her ability to think rationally about the situation was difficult for him to wrap his head around.</p><p>"Because, I love Jasper," Bella informed him simply, truthfully, "And I know that if he could help it he wouldn't do it."</p><p>"I know that too," He replied very carefully as if trying to make her understand that her acceptance wasn't what he had been expecting, "As angry as I was in the moment you were injured I'd already forgiven him because I've experienced Blood Lust, for the first two centuries of my limited immortality, I lived it.</p><p>"So how can you, a very Human young woman, continue to be so gracious? Even after your experience with James?"</p><p>"I know one day I'll live with it too," it was something she didn't think too much about, not when she still had a few more years to process it, but Bella knew she had to remind herself of that fact the moment she's realized she was injured.</p><p>Suddenly she felt his lips pressed to the back of her head, Bella wondered at the action as Carlisle inhaled slowly before he began to clean her wound with antiseptic,</p><p>"Forgive me, but it's difficult for me to think on that," Carlisle admitted suddenly, his voice close to trembling,</p><p>"Call it hypocritical, but while I enjoy thinking of our time together as endless, I do my best not to dwell on the consequences it may have on your soul."</p><p>Bella swallowed suddenly as something like fear wrapped it's claw around the place she kept safe for him in her chest,</p><p>"My soul?"</p><p>"I have no illusions," Carlisle began very quietly and she could tell from the tugging sensation that he was beginning to apply the sutures,</p><p>"Even though I hope very deeply that I will at least get credit for trying, I know in my heart that there is a chance that I am damned."</p><p>"Carlisle," Bella couldn't believe what she was hearing but part of her could, had he not told her that she had everything to lose by loving him?</p><p>"You can't be damned, you're too good."</p><p>"Perhaps I wasn't," He acquiesced but then Carlisle uttered the next words like a confessional,</p><p>"But I know I truly must be now for what I am planning."</p><p>"I don't understand," she tried to, of course she did but he seemed to be speaking in riddles which she needed to chase.</p><p>Fortunately he was willing to explain, even if it was quiet in a tone that bespoke such guilt it threatened to break her heart,</p><p>"I need you to understand that every Vampire I have created was done so in the moments in which their human life was leaving them.</p><p>"I have always thought it too cruel a thing for me to cut a life short."</p><p>Bella's protest bubbled up in her chest but he pulled her hair aside, and kissed her neck exactly where the chain of her precious gift lay,</p><p>"But I will change you regardless, for I have committed a great sin against God to love you, but should this be blasphemy, I would hope it to be gentle.</p><p>"I welcome damnation if having you is the price."</p><p>Bella turned her face towards him and found the man still hovering there behind her, slightly offset to allow for her movement.</p><p>"Carlisle, I still don't think you're damned. Not for being a Vampire and especially not for loving me so much that you want me forever.</p><p>"Not when it's what I want too. I believe, as silly as it sounds, that love as long as it's good and true can't possibly be a sin."</p><p>Finally Carlisle gave her a smile, it was small and barely there but it existed nonetheless as he pressed his forehead to hers. Still he was cool and the sensation was soothing from all the panic and adrenaline from the events of the day as he wrapped her fixed arm in a sterile bandage.</p><p>When he completed his task, they sat like that for a moment simply together before he sighed, "I supposed it is time to take you home."</p><p>"No way," Bella immediately rejected the offer, her proverbial heels were ready to dig themselves into the ground like a pack mule who knew that a ledge was unstable,</p><p>"I'm not leaving this house until I can look Jasper in the eye and tell him that I'm not angry and I love him very much."</p><p>"Never stop being perfect," Carlisle requested impossibly in lieu of an answer before scooping her up into his arms one more time and to Bella's surprise not knocking any of his books of his desk. He then began moving toward the door.</p><p>"Where are we going?"</p><p>"Well, if we're to have a family meeting in the morning, because that's when the others will likely be back from hunting, you need to get yourself to sleep right now," Carlisle replied easily without even wavering in his stride and Bella realized that she was very much being carried to his bedroom.</p><p>Her stomach was churning and bubbling but she reminded herself that she'd been in there before, just after prom she'd slept on those very blue and comfy sheets.</p><p>"I have to call Charlie," she said instead of voicing her nerves and Carlisle had the audacity to reply,</p><p>"I'm not stopping you."</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>"He's more myself than I am, whatever souls are made of his and mine are the same." - Emily Bronte [Wuthering Heights]-this is the only quote not directly cited in the text so far</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Chapter 3</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>They really just keep doing what they want regardless of the plot I have set out for them.</p><p>Rude as hell.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>They'd whispered together about what schools she was planning to apply to for college and Carlisle very gently caressed her face until Bella was taken by sleep.</p><p>When morning came he was still laying next to her, only a small space heater was humming on the floor near the foot of the bed and Bella smiled at feel of it from her place tucked up against her Mate. Two wonderful nights of sleep was something to treasure even if it was a precursor for what would no doubt be a very tense family meeting.</p><p>Bella clutched at her companion's shirt, an action which caused him to chuckle airily, "Isabella, I can tell you're awake."</p><p>"I'm not pretending to be asleep for <em>you</em>," she whispered against his chest in mild complaint but ultimately knew what had to be done as she forced one of her eyes opened in order to look up at him a bit foggily,</p><p>"But I guess I should get up, y'know, for school."</p><p>"When were you planning to tell Charlie you were injured?" Carlisle nuzzled her hair softly and Bella wished that she could just lay there forever and make all their problems go away. Because she hadn't told Charlie about the 5 sutures that had made their home in her arm for the next 4-5 weeks, Bella knew if she had that he'd refuse to let her stay the night.</p><p>And Bella absolutely needed to stay the night.</p><p>"Well then I guess I have to tell Charlie it happened this morning," regret was clear in her voice, she was keeping enough things from him, and it felt a bit awful to be lying about when an injury occurred as well as how,</p><p>"I tripped and fell through the table, at least that's close to the truth."</p><p>"Indeed it is, how are you feeling? Last night was very intense and I know you are likely still attempting to process it, " his tone was truly solicitous and Bella felt waves of his affection practically wash over her,</p><p>He was right though, Emmett had completely stopped Jasper in his tracks with such violent force that Bella had no idea what to think. But only Emmett and maybe Edward could answer the whys of that. So, instead she asked Carlisle about his own actions,</p><p>"I'm a bit overwhelmed still, and confused," Bella struggled sharing her emotions. Her thoughts were her own and while she knew Carlisle would likely never judge her, Bella always thought of her mind as a place where she didn't have to hide and belonged only to her,</p><p>"Especially over the way you reacted... I- I wasn't expecting you to do that to Edward."</p><p>She didn't know how to explain it, Bella wasn't scared or frightened of Carlisle, but seeing him so ready to hurt his own son, a Vampire he created and had been with for nearly 100 years was something that she hadn't thought him capable of.</p><p>"He meant well," Carlisle said and he sounded as if he was speaking very deliberately and trying to get the words right,</p><p>"But in that moment he'd injured you and Jasper was trying to get to you as well. There was one way to get them both out of reach of you and while it was a bit harsh, I was still in control of myself enough that I didn't actually harm him.</p><p>"Edward understands that it was about your safety. Just as I understand that while we are all bound together by our lifestyle and love, Jasper and Alice will always choose each other first as will Emmett and Rosalie.</p><p>"Should a situation arise, and I have to choose between you or Edward it will always be you. Always."</p><p>"That's not fair," Bella frowned and she could feel her brow scrunching together in consternation,</p><p>"You've loved them longer, been with them all for decades. They're your children."</p><p>Carlisle heaved a great sigh, "And they are all very much capable of taking care of themselves should they need to, but Bella, you have been the reason I've continued on in this seemingly endless loneliness.</p><p>"I couldn't bear to lose you, not now and not ever."</p><p>After a moment of quiet contemplation Carlisle began, much to Bella's disappointment, to move as if to removed himself from her, "Alice has left you an outfit on the foot of the bed, so I recommend changing and making your way down quickly for our meeting.</p><p>"I'll be heading to the basement to see if we have anything that can be cobbled together into a decent breakfast."</p><p>He was on his feet in a moment and making his way to the door as Bella fully registered the words he'd spoken, "Why the basement?"</p><p>Stopping in his tracks Carlisle tilted his head a bit to look at her, "Simply because that's where we store our groceries."</p><p>Bella immediately sat upright, as she was presented with a mystery that she couldn't begin to even understand, "Why do you have groceries?"</p><p>Carlisle appeared on the verge of a quiet chuckle, his eyes practically twinkled, which was a strange contrast to their heavy conversation just before, "Isabella, Forks is a very small town and people would notice if we never went shopping."</p><p>"So you have a basement full of groceries?" Bella felt an incredulous laugh begin to bubble up inside of her as the thought of Carlisle pushing a shopping cart while his children dumped random human food inside of it filled her head.</p><p>She'd been shopping and never seen them, but that was besides the point!</p><p>"Not exactly full," He was smiling as if genuinely entertained by her disbelief, "Every two weeks I empty our stores and drive the groceries to the food bank in Seattle."</p><p>"That's it," Bella declared as the knowledge that the Cullens had actual food in the house fully registered for her,</p><p>"You're all never ordering out for me again."</p><p>"None of us can cook save for Emmett," Carlisle reminded her rather patiently, still clearly amused by her reaction, "Even then he's more of the 'rustic chef'. Ask him to pit smoke a hog and he'll do just fine but frying an egg is beyond him."</p><p>"Then I'll cook it," Bella replied through a laugh which was huffed out lightly, "Honestly! The fact that no one told me this before is ridiculous!"</p><p>Carlisle only chuckled as he rushed back to her, placing a gentle kiss on her lips too fast for Bella to properly respond before he was back to the door,</p><p>"Well then we'll have to purchase you some cookery! Alice will love that."</p><p>Bella only groaned facetiously before he made he way out of the room to do exactly as he'd promised. As for her, she very carefully removed the soft night shirt and pants combo that Alice had set aside the night before in a small basket out side of Carlisle's room.</p><p>She was happy to find the fashionable Vampire girl's offerings for the day were exactly to Bella's taste as the long sleeve was a bit looser with a button up style front in order to account for her bandaged wrapped arm.</p><p>As she dressed Bella knew she was going to have to decide what to do. Either got to school with her busted arm and not tell Charlie until after he got off his late shift, or go straight home in order tell her dad immediately about her injury.</p><p>The second sounded like the best option, as he'd likely be suspicious if she hid the injury, or even angry that she'd not told him immediately. Bella was feeling guilty enough though so heading straight home and missing one day wasn't going to be a big deal. Especially after everything that had happened.</p><p>But first, before she went to her father and made her excuses and built more delicately on her small tower of lies and hidden truths, there was a blond Vampire boy that needed assuring. One who was an empath and would be able to tell if she was lying from a mile away.</p><p>So, after dressing herself and taking a calming breath, Bella focused on the love she had for Jasper and Alice. How they had protected her and listened to her that day in Phoenix while they continued to provide protection.</p><p>Alice's words came back to her from that day, <em>"Jasper, Edward, and me do. We decided to love you a very long time ago."</em></p><p>It was enough to steel her resolve as she made her way out of the master bedroom and very delicately descended the stairs alone. As she did, Bella could hear the quiet chatter of the family who had assembled in the living room.</p><p>She couldn't hear the actual words, only the noise of hushed whispers.</p><p>As she was halfway down the second set of steps, Emmett appeared on the landing, his black curls a bit messy and his golden eyes much brighter than Bella had ever seen them. In his hand was a small paper plate which was likely left over from some pizza she'd eaten, atop it was a hot pocket.</p><p>Bella smiled at the boy, "Nutritious."</p><p>"Hey, it's the best we could do with what we've got," Emmett replied widely grinning, an expression which showed of his dimples,</p><p>"You're lucky we have a microwave."</p><p>An actual laugh came to her then as she reached the bottom of the stairs and took the plate from him gratefully, "Thank you Emmett."</p><p>"No problem," the burly boy shrugged as Carlisle appeared next to them with a tight smile.</p><p>Emmett seemed to take that as his cue to rejoin his Mate in the living room and Bella folded the flimsy plate into a makeshift hot pocket holder before taking a bite. Carlisle's hand entwined with her free one so that they could join the rest of the family together.</p><p>The first thing Bella noticed was the fact that everyone was standing. Jasper was positioned directly between Emmett and Edward instead of with Alice, who was sort of unnaturally still next to her copper haired brother.</p><p>"It's good to see you feeling better Jasper," Bella smiled and tried to recall all of her affection for the boy, it felt like a bitter knife in her stomach that he wouldn't look at her, his eyes drilled to the floor. She pushed that away though, this was about him,</p><p>"I was worried that you'd think I was angry. You know I'm not though right? I love you enough to know that you didn't mean it."</p><p>Jasper finally looked up and his bright golden eyes bore into her, they were wide and practically glistening with Venomous tears she knew would never fall.</p><p>"Jasper wants to head to Denali for a while," Alice spoke finally breaking the awful quiet that had permeated the room,</p><p>"Like Edward did."</p><p>"We should all just leave completely," Rosalie spoke through gritted teeth and Bella noted that Emmett quickly took her hand.</p><p>"I'm not leaving Isabella," Carlisle replied firmly, it was so resolute Bella had to take a breath.</p><p>"You can stay Carlisle," Edward shook his head and his tone sounded almost tortured, "5 years is nothing to wait.</p><p>"We can all come back together when she's changed. Its the safest way."</p><p>"Except that's irresponsible at best and reckless at worst," Emmett announced rather boldly gaining the entire floor,</p><p>"Victoria may not be skulking around now but she's still gonna want a bite outta Bella for what we did to James. We don't even know if she'll have company.</p><p>"Carlisle can't take care of her by himself, not if he's up against two or more Vampires."</p><p>"Not to mention how horrific it will look if Carlisle lost custody of all of us and only months later it came out that he's in a relationship with Bella," Alice choked out appalled and Bella agreed with both of them.</p><p>"What was that Alice?!" Edward suddenly hissed, Bella realized they were sharing a Vision or Alice had thought on one that had already occurred.</p><p>"It won't be anything if the rest of you stay here!" Alice tried and Bella finally spoke up on the matter,</p><p>"Alice, if it's important you should share it."</p><p>The tiny Vampire girl swept her gaze over the room and she closed her eyes for a moment before slowly opening them and declaring,</p><p>"Last night when Jasper and I were hunting, after Edward left us, I had a Vision of Laurent killing Bella in the forest.</p><p>"Her truck was there so I must have been just off the road."</p><p>Bella felt Carlisle become still as death in his place next to her and she did her best to squeeze his hand. Dying wasn't something she dwelt on, she was willing to sacrifice herself for her family, people she loved. Being willing to put everyone else first was how she'd been able to see clearly enough that she needed to leave Renee's life, how she'd been able to decide that making herself bait for James was the best course to take. </p><p>But being murdered without reason wasn't a way she was about to go out, not when she had a million things to live for. There was no way that she wasn't going to use every single bit of her Human strength to fight.</p><p>A stillness coated the room and Jasper once again stared at his feet as if her death would be all his fault should it come to pass. Bella's heart ached for the boy who no doubt felt beyond guilty for everything that had happened the night before and she wondered if the Vision had occurred when he'd made the choice to leave. How that must have made him even more angry, directing all that pain inwards.</p><p>"Then Alice and Jasper will go to Denali for a little while and everyone else will stay," Bella tried to be the one to push forwards, be strong.</p><p>"Emmett and Rosalie can get away for a weekend if it's too much but I'm sure everything will be fine if they come right back. Carlisle and Edward will be enough until then."</p><p>Rosalie was staring at her, Bella realized, her topaz eyes burning like a fire that the Human girl just couldn't understand. The blond Vampire girl was still a mystery to her, Bella knew that Rosalie cared about her family, her protests over the Human girl had been about safety and the exact kind of accidents that had transpired the night before. Yet, Bella wondered if there was something else. Something deeper that made Rosalie stare with such severe emotion.</p><p>"That's only if they want to," Bella continued, not willing to be swayed by the tension permeating the air,</p><p>"I don't want anyone to leave, but I'm not going to stop them either."</p><p>She took another bite of her hot pocket then, it was a forced action as Bella was no longer hungry but didn't want Emmett and Carlisle's rather kind gesture to go to waste.</p><p>Determination filled her though.</p><p>"None of this would even be a problem if we'd all just left Bella alone," Rosalie suddenly revealed her true feelings on the matter, it was heated and almost desperate,</p><p>"Look at us! Scrambling around trying to keep her alive for another 5 years when it's hardly going to make a difference because we'll be the ones killing her anyways!"</p><p>The words had Bella's heart pounding in her ears while he chest began to feel as if it was on the verge of splitting from the pike that had been run through her the night before. Fortunately Carlisle took that moment to gently put his arms around her waist, tucking her closely against him in a clear attempt to provide comfort,</p><p>"Rosalie, you're upsetting Isabella."</p><p>The blonde Vampire girl grit her teeth and looked ready to spit fire at the words her father spoke, as if she didn't care a single whit about Bella's feelings on the matter.</p><p>"Rose," Emmett's tone was soothing as he too drew his Mate close to him, "You know that's not an option anymore.</p><p>"She's one of us now and we protect our own."</p><p>"We're not the only ones who can protect her," Rosalie suddenly declared and while the words had a very clear meaning on the surface, Bella was confused as to what they were  truly attempting to convey. After all, the Cullens were the only Vampires she could trust, perhaps the Denali too once Bella had actually been introduced, but the way the blonde had spoken it didn't sound like she was  talking about a Vampiric Guard.</p><p>"No," Edward protested suddenly, spitting out the word like it was foul in his mouth, "That's not an option."</p><p>"I am not leaving Isabella so the point is moot," Carlisle reminded them sternly. He then looked over his children and reinforced what Bella herself had said,</p><p>"None of you are being forced to stay here with us. I will hold no grudge if you leave so as to keep Isabella safe.</p><p>"But there is no power which can take me from her side."</p><p>"Death will," Edward was clearly angry and perhaps stressed by the situation they had been placed in,</p><p>"If we all leave, and Victoria and Laurent show up demanding blood for James, you'll die."</p><p>"Then I'll die," Carlisle said the words with such force Bella couldn't stand it,</p><p>"Carlisle no. No one is dying. Not if I can help it! If- If-"</p><p>Suddenly it dawned on her what was best for the family and she couldn't stand it. The place Carlisle resided within her cracked like a mighty oak falling and splintering as it crashed against the rock hard ground. She ignored the mighty warning and trudged forwards, mustering all the power she could.</p><p>The same power she'd used to stay home every night and do bills, to wash the dishes, make dinner, shutting everything and everyone out only to end up telling Renee that she wanted to live with Charlie. The very same power that had Bella dismissing her Guard and entering the Ballet Studio alone. </p><p>All alone. </p><p>"If you all have to leave me then I understand. I'm not worth dying over."</p><p>A noise came from Carlisle's throat, it was like a suppressed guttural scream and it rocked through Bella like a hurricane.</p><p>"Take it back, I beg you," Carlisle grabbed her shoulders frantically but carefully enough not to harm her as he turned Bella so that she could look at him, his eyes were frantic as if she was once again in danger of being mauled, her chest still quaking like a glass house on a fault line,</p><p>"Tell me to stay! Please!"</p><p>Bella shook her head violently, and the feeling of falling apart impossibly intensified causing a small scream to rip through her but she refused to let it out as she pressed her lips together. Tears began burning in her eyes as she tried to hold back what felt like the four winds pounding within her. </p><p>"Bella do it!" Jasper finally broke his shamed silence, his tone frantic like death was on his heels, "Your Bond's gonna shatter like a fire cracker if you don't!"</p><p>"Stay!" Bella finally cried out, fearing the worst might happen, that she might actually forever be separated from the man she loved so much she'd give him eternity. Her selfishness winning out against all else,</p><p>"I lied, I want you to stay but I can't stand the thought of tearing you all apart!</p><p>"I told you! I didn't want to be this! I didn't want to join you if it meant you lost your family!"</p><p>Carlisle wrapped her in his arms and Bella stupidly tried her best not to drop her hot pocket as she returned the embrace. Finally the ache in her chest was finally becoming a gentle throb again.</p><p>"Holy shit," Emmett whispered like he'd just witnessed a train wreck that had caused untold destruction, "What the hell have you two been doing that your Bond is so messed up?!"</p><p>"Nothing apparently," Alice shuddered a sigh clearly glad that the worst had been avoided, "That's the problem."</p><p>"Please don't ever tell me to leave again," Carlisle whispered the plea into her hair as he cradled her close, "Promise me."</p><p>"I promise," Bella could feel her tears beginning to fall warmly down her cheeks on onto Carlisle's shirt as he gently rocked her back and forth,</p><p>"But I can't just sit here and accept the fact that you staying means you dying."</p><p>"I'll stay," Edward declared and Alice heave a great sigh of relief which turned to an actual smile when Emmett too said,</p><p>"Me too. I can't accept that either."</p><p>The dark haired Vampire turned to his Mate, "If you want to head up to Denali, I'll take time on the weekends to see you. It's alright if you leave, but I can't just let Carlisle lose her not after all this time."</p><p>"Fine," Rosalie's jaw was tense as she spoke her eyes still hard to read, "I'll stay, for Emmett."</p><p>Not loosening his hold on Bella, the Vampire holding her rested his cheek atop her head so that he could look upon his family, "Thank you, all of you. I cannot express what it means to me."</p><p>"Jasper and I are going to head up north," Alice reminded them all softly, her eyes met Bella's and they were hopeful, "We'll be back in no time though.</p><p>"You'll see. We'll be here before it happens."</p><p>"It's still happening?" Emmett sounded disbelieving and Alice turned to him, her tone still lighter than before but heavy,</p><p>"She's still going to be attacked and I don't know where it is because the location keeps changing, but it's always Laurent and there's always a vehicle."</p><p>"So Laurent wasn't going to wash his hands of the whole affair after all," Edward still sounded bitter and angry over everything that had happened and would still yet occur.</p><p>"There was always a chance that his visit was recon," Carlisle reminded them, very slowly he began to release Bella from his hold. Bella remembered thinking the same that day in the Ballet studio but it surprised her when Carlisle continued,</p><p>"We have to be prepared for the worst."</p><p>"You think they had a 3 way Split Bond?" Jasper whispered almost half disbelieving, still nervous to speak.</p><p>"That can happen?" Bella found herself startled by the notion but Carlisle kissed her forehead soothingly,</p><p>"Sometimes, but once a Bond is formed between a pair it's fairly easy to tell if they're waiting for a third.</p><p>"Our Denali cousins Tanya and Esme are Bonded and waiting, it's not uncommon."</p><p>"Oh," Bella processed that and realized that if all parties involved felt the same way she felt for Carlisle equally among themselves then it was simply a different way to love,</p><p>"That's nice to know."</p><p>"And it's dangerous," Edward reminded her shortly, "Because if that's the case we'll have two vengeful Mates on our hands instead of one.</p><p>"If we only get one of them, the last Vampire standing will likely be willing to raze all of Washington to get to you."</p><p>"One thing at a time," Carlisle said in such a tone that Bella got the feeling that their meeting was over,</p><p>"We protect Bella and hope to get them both. Until then, I only need to know if I am taking her home or to school."</p><p>"Home," Bella sighed, the weight of everything had exhausted her completely, everything in her was demanding not to leave Carlisle's side as her pain was still steadily thrumming instead of growing warm as it was supposed to in her Mate's presence, but she still had to talk to Charlie,</p><p>"I need a break, a bigger meal, and maybe better pain killers."</p><p>Carlisle huffed out a small laugh which was echoed by a couple of his children, Bella wasn't paying them attention but would put money it being Emmett or Edward.</p><p>"Let's get you a prescription then."</p><hr/><p><br/>Bella had never sat in the front seat of the Mercedes.</p><p>So it was strangely comforting as she, for the first time, did so. At her feet was a small gift bag containing the dress and shoes from the night before. Around her neck Polaris, and in her left hand Carlisle's was tangled almost lazily with her own on the center console.</p><p>The solidness of the moment made her feel like her feet were firmly on the ground and would never leave again until even the stars fell from the heavens.</p><p>Bella knew she'd made a mistake asking him to leave, their Bond was deep and vast but it had not yet reached the point where it could never be revoked. There was nothing she wanted more than to be with him and live with his family, but Bella valued them all far above herself. It was simply how she loved. She felt guilty though for saying it, knowing that they were still at risk if they separated. So, as she stared at Carlisle wrapped up in his double breasted coat and scarf, she decided to tell him the truth.</p><p>"I don't want t go home," Bella said the words and finally the icy pain inside of her began to defrost in the smallest of ways,</p><p>"Carlisle I just want to be with you and shut everything else out."</p><p>"That's the Bond," Carlisle replied steadily as he turned off the forest drive and they took to the road leading into Forks proper,</p><p>"All the unsurety, and fear with James as well as last night with Jasper, it drives our instincts to fully Establish the link."</p><p>"What does that entail?" Bella felt like she knew, deep inside her if she fantasized all the way to the end of the scenario of just being with Carlisle alone with the rest of the world locked away, she had a very clear idea what she wanted.</p><p>"It would require us to completely lose ourselves to each other," Carlisle described the act delicately at first then, seeming to think better of it as they were alone, away from well meaning prying ears,</p><p>"Making love to you would mean that no matter the time or distance our Bond wouldn't break."</p><p>"But that's not an option," Bella filled in the gaps because he was so determined to go slow, she appreciated it really but the fact was she felt like she was being tortured slowly,</p><p>"Because you don't want me yet."</p><p>"Isabella I wanted you the moment I saw you for the first time in the ER and you were so frazzled, not knowing how my heart tugged me so close to you that I barely realized it until I had nearly kissed you," Carlisle confessed almost breathlessly and her heart skipped a beat as warmth finally began edging out the cold inside of her,</p><p>"I simply feel we shouldn't continue past what we have now until your father knows about us."</p><p>"Well," Bella filled her cheeks with air and exhaled slowly, a bit shocked by the turn of the topic from sex to her father. Not only was she no longer whimsically willing to fantasize but her entire mood was shifted to her uneasiness about the whole situation regarding Charlie,</p><p>"At least you're not waiting until we're married."</p><p>"Though I will want a Human wedding where we make our vows, we will technically be married by my kind's standards the moment the act is complete," Carlisle admitted a bit slyly and Bella couldn't believe she was blushing while thinking about having to tell her father about her 400 year old Vampire boyfriend in order to have sex and be instantly married.</p><p>"Talk about a private ceremony," Bella found herself blurting and couldn't take it back no matter how much she wished to invent time travel but fortunately Carlisle chuckled brightly at her rather indelicate joke.</p><p>Quickly he brought up their linked hands and kissed her's before once more resting them on the console between them.</p><p>"At least tell me this isn't about my soul," Bella hoped that he didn't have a misguided notion about needing Charlie's approval in order to have her. Which would absolutely murder her because Bella was beginning to think Charlie would let them carry on merrily over his dead body.</p><p>"Isabella," the Vampire sighed but it came off as affectionate as he continued to focus on the road, not quite at the speed his children enjoyed but still a bit faster than was likely legal,</p><p>"You spend so much time worrying about everyone else, that you don't realize when other people worry about you."</p><p>"So this is about me?" she was confused suddenly, because Bella was nervous as hell to have sex but that was because she was a virgin. She knew it would be a bit awkward and perhaps embarrassing, but sex with Carlisle? He'd take his time, he'd be gentle, and Bella wasn't worried at all about the man she'd chosen for it.</p><p>So why was telling Charlie so important to him?</p><p>"My Virtue will be perfectly safe whether or not Charlie knows Carlisle, most parents don't know when their kids start having sex."</p><p>Carlisle actually began chuckling then, likely amused at her determination to have him combined with her disbelief over his request to tell her dad.</p><p>"It's not about virtue or tradition," Carlisle assured her with a smile, then very kindly he informed her,</p><p>"I simply don't want you to feel regret. When we have sex, I don't want it to be coated in guilt because we're lying to your father.</p><p>"When we make love, I never want you to feel you have to hide it. So unless you can tell me that, when we do tell Charlie and he asks if I've had my very wicked way with you, that you will be very happy to confess that I have, then I will not touch you until he knows that we are romantically involved."</p><p>He kissed her hand again, still smiling, his tone flirtatious in a way he hadn't quite allowed himself yet. Some how his playfulness helped Bella understand better, but also made her wish he wasn't so absolutely good and righteous.</p><p>Bella shook her head laughingly at his words, "Alright, but in the meantime, birth control takes time and so should I be worried about anything? Maybe Mr. Doctor?"</p><p>"Please, Mr. Doctor was my Father," Carlisle teased and Bella actually chortled at the strangeness of it, as that was normally the kind of joke she'd have told to him.</p><p>"But, to answer you truthfully Vampires are unable to change and grow so we are quite unable to have children," Carlisle explained to her and Bella frowned for a moment as she considered that,</p><p>"Alright so how many Vampire-Human relationships do you know of? I mean, I kind of got the impression that if a Vampire Bonds with a Human it's usually 'Bite first fall in love later' "</p><p>"Mostly, you are correct," he replied thoughtfully, "But, our Un-Bonded cousins in Denali have been known to enjoy the company of Human men."</p><p>"Right and so they can't get pregnant because their bodies can't change, but mine can Carlisle," Bella knew it was probably stupid to be so worried but she was only just 18 and this wasn't the 1800s, she wasn't about to go from taking care of her mother to taking care of her father to getting pregnant with a liger baby,</p><p>"So how many Vampire men do you know that have been with Human women."</p><p>Silence reigned for an uncomfortable stretch before Carlisle spoke, "None that didn't end in the woman's death."</p><p>Bella took a deep breath and was grateful they were talking about this before they actually decided to just plunge into it,</p><p>"So the scientific method states that you don't actually know if you can get me pregnant."</p><p>"If I could it would have occurred a very long time ago and the Volturi would have regulations for situations such as ours.</p><p>"Its the reason Immortal Children were created and are now taboo."</p><p>"I have no idea what that is," Bella informed him trusting that he would understand that she was referring to the term Immortal Children.</p><p>"Children who are changed into Vampires, they were so uncontrollable, as they were slaves to their instincts just as all children are, that the time in which they were being created is considered and era of Plague upon our world" Carlisle explained simply as if it was a fact of life that at some point in history Vampires were actually transforming children in a desperate attempt to have babies of their own, </p><p>"Their tantrums would level entire villages and their thirst ran rampant."</p><p>"That sounds awful," she couldn't imagine putting a child who barely understood life through that kind of transformation.</p><p>"They were very beautiful I'm told," Carlisle said the words with a sadness and Bella wondered if he had known someone who had created such a sad sad child, "Now though, if they are created both the child, the Creator, and the Coven who harbor it are destroyed."</p><p>It painted a brutal picture of both such a terrible time and the power which the Volturi held. She did feel a bit guilty that the words eased her mind, knowing that it had been tried and she had no fear of becoming pregnant on accident. Bella didn't know if she was completely happy though. Carlisle was already an amazing father but Bella had never actually wanted children of her own. it was different with the Cullens. She was happy to marry a man with children of his own and help take care of them if that was what they wished but having her own babies wasn't appealing to her as it was to some. Yet she thought that if Carlisle had wanted a child she could likely grow passionate about the idea.</p><p>Now she'd never know.</p><p>Bella's mind was still heavy with thoughts as Carlisle pulled up to the Swan house, Charlie's cruiser was still in the drive and Bella truly didn't want to leave the comfort of Carlisle's car. She was surprised when the man himself actually exited the vehicle in order to open her door in the gentlemanly manner he always maintained.</p><p>Bella couldn't help but find the action risky, but Charlie would likely not mind as she was injured so she gingerly accepted her Mate's hand and allowed him to aid her out of his car.</p><p>"Don't forget to pick up your prescription," Carlisle reminded her softly and Bella knew if they weren't in front of the house with Charlie inside he'd kiss her.</p><p>"I won't," Bella smiled and grabbed her bag from the front seat before swallowing back her nerves over Charlie's reaction to her situation and as confidently as she could manage began making her way to the house.</p><p>Not so surprisingly Charlie was out of the front door to meet her practically striding down the lawn, "Morning Dr. Cullen, there a reason Bella isn't in school?"</p><p>Her father's tone was tight and held a level of disbelief coated in suspicion that made Bella's stomach feel heavy like lead.</p><p>"Chief Swan," the Doctor nodded his head as he slowly made his way back around to the driver's side of his Mercedes, his tone was casual and smooth, "Isabella had a small accident and I recommended that she come home directly. I'm sure she'll fill you in on the details."</p><p>Charlie immediately turned his attention back to Bella as if he thought she'd be suddenly missing a limb.</p><p>"I kind of destroyed their glass coffee table with my butt this morning," Bella said without ceremony and she was pleased that Carlisle had to press the back of his hand to his mouth to cover up his laugh as he loaded himself back into his car,</p><p>"Fortunately only my left arm needed stitches, 5 to be exact."</p><p>Charlie sighed and didn't even pay any mind to Carlisle as he drove away without incident, "What am I gonna do with you Bells?"</p><p>"Let me sleep until my shift at Newton's?" She offered and Charlie gave her a completely deadpan expression which Bella knew meant that if Dr. Cullen didn't want her going to school, she sure as hell wasn't going to work.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. Chapter 4</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>*rubs my little hands together* </p><p>I can't believe I already broke 20k with this chapter.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>"I know you don't like celebrating your birthday but that was like two days ago," Jacob Black's tone was eager as could be as it came from her flip phone which was laying opened on her nightstand,</p><p>"The last time we hang out was last weekend and you're gonna tell me that you can't come over?"</p><p>Bella had him on speaker as she sat on her duvet covered bed and cleaned her gauze for the morning. As she applied the antibiotic gel she shook her head at her friend's determination to get her down to his house. She had to give him points for trying though.</p><p>"Jacob, my arm is pretty banged up and I have a shift at work after school."</p><p>"Then what?" Jacob prompted a bit forcefully, clearly trying to make a point. Bella had to admit he was right though. Tuesday had been a disaster while most of Wednesday was spent trying to sleep while failing miserably because the Bond kept jostling around in side of her like a temperamental chihuahua.</p><p>Bella's call to her mother had consisted of platitudes about Renee not needing to fly across the country simply because her daughter had needed stitches, again. At this point she was surprised Charlie hadn't tried to coat her in bubble wrap.</p><p>"Because if you say you're going to the Cullens I'm going to actually lose it."</p><p>"Jake, c'mon, don't make this about Edward," Bella sighed, the boy hadn't gotten over his suspicion of Edward. Now that she'd 'fallen backwards through a glass table', Jacob had planted his flag on his hill and was fully prepared to die on it gloriously.</p><p>"But it's about him isn't it?" Jacob's tone was genuinely concerned and Bella closed her eyes slowly trying to remind herself of all the reasons  she couldn't just tell her friend that she was actually seeing Carlisle and don't worry, Edward only pushed me into the table to make sure Jasper didn't tear my throat out. Beside Carlisle already threw him across the living room so it's all good.</p><p>"It's not," Bella exhaled, slowly and she knew it sounded like a sigh but the air managed to blow away all the things she wished she could confess at the moment. Mostly though, she was starting to experience and overwhelming guilt for neglecting Jacob as she was still trying to process the fact that Jasper and Alice had officially reached Alaska some time in the early hours of the morning.</p><p>Two of her best friends just gone from her life until they were ready to come back. Which they needed to do ASAP because a vengeful Vampire wanted Bella dead. Which was monumentally stupid if you thought rationally about the whole affair!</p><p>James was the one who decided to take on a huge Coven but apparently Victoria, and possibly Laurent, weren't rational at the moment. No, they were more blood thirsty in the most terrifyingly literal sense.</p><p>"Listen, I'll call you after work and, if I feel up to it, I'll drive down and we can decide on what we're going to fix up," Bella finally caved, she did miss Jacob and he deserved a bit of attention. Especially since he was the only one besides Carlisle who hadn't complained about her request for no gifts.</p><p>Then again Carlisle got special treatment, being the only exception to the rule.</p><p>But he was the only exception to a lot of Bella's rules.</p><p>"Alright," Jacob didn't sound entirely convinced but Bella wasn't feeling at her best, not with the Bond being so demanding and refusing to settle down. Her longing for Carlisle seemed to only grow every time they parted and she was about to start climbing the walls.</p><p>Now was not the time to tell Charlie, and Carlisle said he wanted to stay as they were until her dad knew which meant that Bella wouldn't even get her date that she'd been practically dying for. She understood his reasoning, and on some level agreed with it, that didn't mean it wasn't torture.</p><p>"I just wish you hadn't kept your summer job, we could be hanging out so much more now that you have half days."</p><p>"You still have full days Jacob," Bella reminded him a bit chidingly but she knew he wouldn't mind, and Jacob didn't if his snort was anything to go by as she continued,</p><p>"And I'm not going to deal with Billy staring me down for turning you into a hooligan by having you ditch just to hang out.</p><p>"Besides, I have like two more weeks and I'm done with it."</p><p>"Yeah well," Jacob sounded completely unapologetic about the whole thing,"Speaking of school I have to head out."</p><p>Bella sighed and knew that she too would have to grab something quick to eat before hoping in The Beast and hitting the road herself. With the sun shining brightly outside the Cullens were likely enjoying a day of games and the like trying their best to ignore the absence of two members of their family.</p><p>"Drive safe Jake," she said a bit more miserably than she intended as her mind went to the Vampires who were still in residence, "And I'll probably see you when you get off school."</p><p>"Just don't go falling through a window or something before then," Jacob teased lightly and Bella shook her head a bit at his antics but only gave a very tolerating,</p><p>"Goodbye Jacob."</p><p>Before hanging up on him and finishing covering up her bandaged wound with the wrap Carlisle had given her. </p><p>She hated when her wounds were so deep that they needed careful treatment, it was such tedious work but she at least knew that she was caring for it properly. Carlisle had written her a prescription for just a few doses of the more mild pain relievers that you couldn't get over the counter, just in case, along with her mandatory antibiotics to prevent infection. There was something odd to her about that, perhaps she knew it was because they were dancing along the edge of an ethical violation by letting him treat her in his house for something she could have easily gone to the hospital for.</p><p>In any case Bella shoved thoughts of him aside as it wouldn't do to get lost in thought over him and all the things she wanted but knew she wouldn't be getting for at least a little while longer.</p><p>Like that date, and perhaps something a little heavier than the kisses they'd shared.</p><p>Shaking herself into the present Bella fiddle a bit with Polaris to make sure the pendant was properly oriented before she headed down the stairs with her school bag in hand. Charlie was still in the middle of an impromptu double shift that began the day before and would likely be back home before she was.</p><p>So Bella threw together a bologna sandwich, which wasn't the best, but it was better than nothing as she'd spent a while talking to Jacob on the phone and didn't have time to cook herself anything more fitting for breakfast.</p><p>Besides, she was tired.</p><p>Absently Bella reminded herself to tell Carlisle that she was having trouble sleeping, it was likely the one thing about the Bond that he wouldn't be able to tell for himself. Yet, Bella was struggling to figure out a way to convey it.</p><p>So many more important things were happening and her light insomnia that had been plaguing her on and off since the James debacle wasn't exactly the most pressing. Not when the Cullens were trying to figure out what the hell was going on with Laurent and Victoria while Jasper isolated himself as punishment for nearly killing her.</p><p>On top of that, she'd had time to think on the things James had claimed in the Ballet Studio and began to wonder a bit about her prescient friend. Alice had never spoken about her Human life, but his tale was too specific, yet vague, not to mean something.</p><p>Bella wished for the first time that she was older.</p><p>That Carlisle and her didn't have to dance this dance and that she could be enough right then.</p><p>By the time Bella finished her sandwich she was forced to remind herself she wasn't supposed to be thinking about the Cullens or Carlisle as she took her pain medication as well as her antibiotics with her last few gulps of orange juice.</p><p>"You're not gonna lose it at school," Bella informed herself as she quickly washed out her glass and placed it in the dish rack. As she grabbed her keys, locked the door and climbed into her truck, Bella took a deep breath.</p><p>Closing her eyes Bella then took another. For a moment she just felt the air in her lungs, "C'mon, you're going to go to school, let Jessica look at you like you've destroyed her life, your going to go suffer through a 4 hour shift with Mike, and then you're going to hang out with Jacob."</p><p>Bella slipped her key into the ignition and turned her truck over as she opened her eyes.</p><p>The radio offered barely any options save for the local morning show, Bella didn't care much about music. She was the kind of person who could really listen to anything and if that made her basic it wasn't exactly new to her.</p><p>She supposed she was living up to her 'old lady cred' when she decided that listening to the local DJs talk about horrific blind date stories that their listeners had sent in via email.</p><p>Bella let herself smile at a few, and was pretty surprised when she pulled into the school parking lot and didn't feel so miserable. Perhaps it was the pain killers combined with the rather ridiculous tales woven by the DJs, whatever it was, she actually found herself ambling into school without the sour mood that had plagued her all morning.</p><p>Not wasting time by going to the cafeteria, Bella made her way towards her locker in order to grab her books for the day and store the homework she'd finished but wasn't quite due.</p><p>As she neared her destination, she found herself caught off guard as Angela Webber stood idly right next to Bella's locker. Angela's own locker was in a different block so the girl was clearly waiting for Bella.</p><p>Oh what a tangled web.</p><p>"Morning Angela," Bella greeted softly, trying to force a good mood and hoping it didn't come off as too unnatural. Fortunately if Angela noticed, she at least appreciated the effort as she smiled back brightly.</p><p>"Good morning, I hope you're feeling better," Angela adjusted her purple framed glasses a bit nervously,</p><p>"I know you just had your birthday so getting sick must have been awful."</p><p>"Oh," Bella fiddled with the lock on her cabinet and popped it opened, then without meaning to sort of bitterly informed the other girl,</p><p>"I wasn't sick, I tripped and fell through a glass coffee table."</p><p>"Bella that's awful," Angela truly seemed appalled at her bitingly blase tone regarding the event as she began searching Bella for any clear injuries,</p><p>"You weren't hurt too badly though right?"</p><p>"I'm fine," Bella tried her best to regain her equilibrium, it wouldn't be good to have people worrying,</p><p>"It happened after my sleep over with Alice on Tuesday, so Dr. Cullen stitched me up. I'll only have them for a couple of weeks so it's not too big of a deal."</p><p>Angela smirked  then, a secret little smile as she said something that Bella never expected, "You're so lucky. I mean, I know he's just Edward's dad but he's really attractive, I don't know how you're able to spend so much time around him.</p><p>"If it was me I be making a fool out of myself."</p><p>Sour bile rose up into Bella's throat as Angela spoke, fortunately though the comment was innocent. If Jessica had said the words it would have been lecherous and a bit infuriating, but it was not so with Angela. The girl thought of Carlisle as <em>'Edward's dad'</em> like she, and everyone else, were supposed to. He was a man set apart, single and attractive but if you tried to get close he'd freeze you to death with a cold shoulder.</p><p>Jessica had called him frigid as <em>Antarctica.</em></p><p>But Bella felt sick as she tried to say that it wasn't like that. She tried to force out the lie that she didn't find Carlisle attractive. Instead, of a proper refutation, Bella's mouth said,</p><p>"It's not that great, honestly I was more worried about Alice feeling bad."</p><p>It was partially true, Bella was very worried about Alice and Jasper, but it was another card added to her carefully constructed tower which was going to fall down around her ears if she wasn't careful.</p><p>"How about you though?" Bella forced herself to focus on anything else but the memory of Carlisle as he kissed her neck where her now permanent chain fell, promising to change her no matter the cost,</p><p>"I mean, has Jessica said anything about you still talking to me?"</p><p>Which was partially true. Angela had spared a few moments for Bella, exactly like the one occurring, but that was it Bella supposed she was lucky, seeing as Angela an her never did manage to get around to that girl's night. Part of Bella wished they had. It was a missed opportunity to make memories and get closer but it seemed Bella was destined to be a horribly awkward and awful friend. Part of her wished that she could be more opened far quicker but her need for the defenses around her heart always won out.</p><p>Angela shrugged a bit lightly and offered a tight smile which Bella thought didn't belong on the other girl's face. Being so kind and easy going, she didn't deserve to be placed in the no man's land between the warring parties</p><p>"It be wouldn't fair if she did. You've been telling us you aren't dating Edward since the start and I know you were probably just having a bad day.</p><p>"Jessica doesn't see it that way though."</p><p>"You don't-" Bella paused and tried her best to remember that this was different. Angela wasn't bound to her utterly and completely and telling her to leave wouldn't hurt anyone but Bella herself. If anything, it would be easier on Angela.</p><p>"You don't have to stick around Angela. Jessica's been your friend for years and I won't blame you if you drop me to keep her friendship"</p><p>She didn't want to look at Angela as she said the words so Bella shoved her storable homework into her locker and uselessly pretended to look for a pencil she knew was in her bag already.</p><p>"Bella that's not fair," Angela was clearly upset by the words, a fact which was surprising but Bella knew the girl was someone who didn't enjoy conflict. So perhaps it wasn't too shocking that Angela didn't like Bella's offer.</p><p>"I'm not telling you I don't want you around," Bella did her level best to reason with the girl. As awful as it was, she had so much drama already happening that she didn't need the teen stage play to kill her from excess,</p><p>"Just that, if it get's too much, I'll understand you choosing Jessica. It's not like I don't spend most of my time between Jake and the Cullens.</p><p>"I've hardly been a good friend to you."</p><p>No longer being able to pretend she was busy, Bella shut her locker and latched the shackle lock onto the hasp.</p><p>"We can still hang out," Angela offered and she appeared half hopeful but half afraid. In that moment Bella wondered what she did to inspire that in a girl as kind as Angela. Perhaps she herself had nothing to do with it though and Angela was simply just the kind of person who embodied their name.</p><p>"Alright," Bella offered a real smile then as affection bloomed anew, it was a small smile but it was genuine,</p><p>"Next time Jake and I go to the movies I'll be sure to give you an invite."</p><p>"That sounds fun," Angela agreed heartily, her smile brightened and she adjusted the strap on her back pack. The bell signalling the beginning of the day rang and Bella gave her cursory wishes for a good day before heading to her first class of the day.</p><p>History was once more spent with the critical eye of Jessica occasionally sent her way while Bella tried her best to remind herself that the red head was just a normal high school girl whose feelings were hurt and being hostile in return would do her no favors.</p><p>Mostly it worked.</p><p>At least until Tyler Crowley, a boy she hadn't even spoken to since she rejected his guilt induced invitation to prom, turned around from his place in front of her and asked with more contrition than necessary,</p><p>"Can I barrow a pencil?"</p><p>Bella had forgiven him for the event with the van, even if Edward hadn't. She also didn't care enough about his opinion to still be miffed by his incessant apologies after Bella had already given absolution.</p><p>So, being a rational Human being, Bella replied, "Yeah of course."</p><p>She then reached into her bag, and pulled out her pencil case before popping it opened and finding a cheap mechanical pencil she was willing to never see again. Simply because that was the way of borrowed pencils in high school.</p><p>Once she' confirmed it had lead, Bella offered it to him, "If you need more lead I have a whole thing of them so just ask."</p><p>"Sweet, thanks Bella," Tyler smiled and it was soft in a way that made Bella realize that he'd been nervous over her reaction to his innocuous request. She tried not to be irritated over the fact that he was likely under the belief that she held a grudge.</p><p>As he took the proffered pencil he pause a bit, head tilted oddly as he was twisted around in his chair. His eyes focused on her chest and Bella was about to say something rude to his rather obvious ogling but Tyler surprised her,</p><p>"Is that a Christmas star?"</p><p>Suddenly Bella felt something similar to a shot of adrenaline in her veins while a cooling sensation ran down he spine.</p><p>"Yeah, it's not for Christmas though, it's just the north star," Bella replied as casually as she could while releasing the pencil, doing her best not to chew her lip nervously at the sudden question.</p><p>"Lauren's birthday is coming up,and she said she wanted jewelry, " Tyler explained a bit casually, and Bella had no idea who in the world he was talking about. The only Lauren she knew of was a Lauren Mallory who was far too popular to walk anywhere near her or her Human 'friends'. Which it could have well been because Tyler was on the Captain of the Basketball team and nearly as popular.</p><p>Whatever the case, it was clear enough that he was asking how much it was and where she got it so Bella had to think fast as hell.</p><p>Fortunately, she had a friend who always gave her things to wear that were far too expensive for a teenage boy to afford, "Alice gave it to me for my birthday. I think she said something about having to order it so I have no idea where to look."</p><p>It was the boldest lie she'd ever told that didn't involve covering up something supernatural.</p><p>"Damn," Tyler sighed but then gave a 'what can you do' look then turned back around in his seat after offering a quick, "Thanks for the pencil though."</p><p>"No problem," she almost failed to say the words and she wondered if anyone could tell what a liar she was.</p><p>Bella knew why she had to do it she wasn't an absolute idiot, though sometimes she did wonder.</p><p>Still, it felt too close to being ashamed for her to be comfortable.</p><p>In that moment Jessica's stare felt less critical and more righteous.</p><p>The rest of the day trudged on and in English she was glad for the semi-solitude while Mike was too busy with Eric to begin nosing around again and no one actually cared about Bella anymore unless it was in relation to her activities with the clan of Cullens</p><p> </p><hr/><p> </p><p>At the end of her short school day she was able to head to the store with her work uniform tucked under her arm so that she could change for her shift in the bathroom. A task that proved a bit difficult with her stitches, but a combination of experience and patience was key to making the task possible. Even though half way through Bella felt like humming out the Mission Impossible theme in sheer frustration.</p><p>Newtons was never very busy unless it was a Friday or the weekend. Bella usually gave what mandatory attention she needed to the customers but wasn't exactly the most socially gracious being on the planet which meant she was the one usually doing stock or other side tasks while Mike or one of his parents worked the register.</p><p>"Welcome to Newton Outfitters, if you need assistance feel free to bring your questions to me," Bella recited the words from her place behind the counter doing returns as she heard the bell chime indicating that a customer had arrived.</p><p>Mike was on the register taking payment from someone Bella found familiar but couldn't quite place the face of. Likely a parent of one of her schoolmates.</p><p>"Thanks Bella, we're just here for a couple new poles for Seth and me," the new customer replied and the familiar voice had her looking up to find Harry Clearwater and a young boy who had to be in middle school.</p><p>Offering a smile to both of them she didn't know what possessed her, perhaps it was the fact that she'd been hiding less and less or the semi-familiar face was a nice break to the monotony, but Bella said,</p><p>"Y'know Harry those poor fish probably know you by now, I wouldn't be surprised if they have posters of your face lining the riverbed as a warning."</p><p>Mike made a strangled noise from his place behind her, likely thinking she'd finally cracked and gone insane. Fortunately though Harry gave a quiet chuckle while Seth beamed brightly as if it was the funniest thing he'd ever heard.</p><p>"Charlie's just as bad y'know!" the younger boy informed her with enthusiasm as he bounded over to her and offered a hand,</p><p>"He talks about you a lot when we go fishing, I'm Seth."</p><p>A beat.</p><p>"But you know that cause dad just said so."</p><p>He was adorable, Bella couldn't help but think of him as cute. Like an over enthusiastic boy scout selling popcorn at the local shopping center.</p><p>Happily she took his hand and shook it, with a teasing smile, "Yeah but it's good you told me just in case he had another son running around that I didn't notice."</p><p>"I can see why Jake likes you," Seth laughed and it was bubbly in an innocent way which recalled Emmett's own boyish manner.</p><p>"That's nice of you to say because Jake has no taste at all," Bella joked knowing it was something Jacob himself would find hilarious . Seth laughed again and she was glad to see that the boys apparently shared a sense of humor.</p><p>"A few months ago he said you might come out fishing with all of us," Seth recalled and Bella realized that she had, in fact, told Jacob that she might go. Right after her rather wonderful first hike with the Cullens.</p><p>Before everything went absolutely wild.</p><p>"Yeah," Bella nodded and wondered about that, it would be a good way to connect to Charlie as she'd been wanting to. She really needed to step up her efforts for him,</p><p>"I'd forgotten but now that you said something I think it would be pretty cool. Maybe I'll ask Charlie about it."</p><p>"Sweet!" Seth cheered a bit more enthusiastically than a boy who barely knew her should and Bella wondered at his rather rambunctious zest for life.</p><p>"Seth, leave Bella alone she's working, " Harry called over from his place perusing the fishing poles,</p><p>"Sorry Bella."</p><p>"No problem," Bella called right back not wanting the boy to get in trouble for being a social butterfly,</p><p>"I'm just doing a couple returns, right Mike?"</p><p>She turned to look at Mike Newton who was sitting on the small stool behind the register that he was allowed to perch on when he wasn't helping a customer. He had clearly been shamelessly watching them interact and Bella realized it must have been extremely alien for him to see her be so comfortable.</p><p>So open.</p><p>Especially with a stranger. Except Seth wasn't really a stranger was he? Harry and Charlie went fishing all the damn time with Billy and Jacob. Seth was practically a cousin she hadn't met yet in the same way Leah Clearwater was an old friend she hadn't spoken to since they were 9 and the other girl almost accidentally broke Bella's arm trying to teach her how to wrestle. </p><p>Picking up his slacked jaw Mike sputtered, "uh- um- Yeah, it's cool I mean we're not busy at all."</p><p>"Still though," Bella turned back to Seth, "You better pick out a pole before your dad picks one for you."</p><p>"Right!" Seth agreed still smiling like a sunny day, "I'll see you later then! Maybe?"</p><p>"Probably," Bella laughed at his seemingly endless cheer as he practically skipped over to his father and the many fishing pole options.</p><p>It wasn't long before the pair of Clearwaters brought their purchases up to Mike. Bella was a bit taken aback with how short Harry was with the boy at the register. Not that he was rude, only he made no real conversation or attempted niceties besides a 'thank you' when handed his receipt. All the while Seth was practically bouncing in place next to him.</p><p>She wondered if Harry just happened to have a gruff exterior as Charlie did and was only open with her by virtue of his friendship with her father. It was funny to think about.</p><p>As she watched the two Quileute men leave she sat on her own little stool behind the counter having finished the few returns.</p><p>Mike surprised her then as he turned his blue eyes in her direction, "I can't believe you got Mr. Clearwater to laugh."</p><p>The boy's expression was genuinely a bit awed and Bella wondered what kind of reputation Harry had. Mostly she'd seen him come in and they'd just greeted each other politely and moved so the current development was a bit strange.</p><p>"You're really funny," Mike announced as an add on with great shock, as if that too was a great secret of the universe he hadn't been privy to. Bella wasn't sure how to respond to that.</p><p>Mike wasn't someone she talked to much and definitely wasn't a person she was willing to have a conversation about real things with.</p><p>"Thanks, I don't tell jokes at school cause I have a limit per day and if I go over it they'll come take me away," Bella replied not knowing why she kept talking instead of just taking the compliment like she normally would.</p><p>Mike wasn't someone she cared to make laugh. Her jokes were for Charlie, Jacob, Carlisle and the rest of the Cullens. People she loved. Perhaps her head was on worse than she realized.</p><p>Her colleague and classmate just stared at her like she'd grown another arm out of her stomach.</p><p>The silence went on far too long for Bella's taste before Mike finally said, "Y'know Jessica means well. I'm sure the two of you could be friends again if you just tried to talk."</p><p>Letting out a long exhaled Bella shook her head lightly. Edward may have been from another planet but Mike was straight from Earth and wasn't that funny? Because Bella mostly understood Edward but Mike was like a complete enigma to her that couldn't be known lest her brain melt.</p><p>"Nah," Bella replied a bit awkwardly. She didn't owe the boy an explanation, but she would make her intentions clear if only to take her and Jessica out of the horrible limbo they were engaged in,</p><p>"That ship has sailed for me."</p><p>Mike swallowed and shook his head lightly, clearly he was protesting and Bella wondered what for as he rebuked her, "You're just going to give up? I mean what about the rest of us? We miss hanging out with you too."</p><p>"Mike," Bella stared at him, really let him know all her focus was on him as she very succinctly informed him,</p><p>"You didn't even know I was funny."</p><p>Bella wondered later if it was worth it.</p><p>To say those words and end the strange stand still with Jessica. In the end though she couldn't actually take it back and Bella didn't think she'd want to despite everything else that would eventually follow.</p><p> </p><hr/><p> </p><p>"First of all, I have to be home by 9," Bella informed Jacob as she stepped into his house. She had come over directly from work so she was still wearing her red polo with her name tag as well as her khakis and work boots. Her hair was pulled back into high ponytail, but Bella knew she probably looked like a mess and a half with how tired she was,</p><p>"And if you don't feed me I'll die and my ghost will haunt you and the rest of your decedents for all time."</p><p>Jacob laughed incredulously as he closed the door behind her then turned around. She noted that he somehow seemed taller than the last time they'd hung out, wider too somehow which was odd since it had only been a few days.</p><p>"Don't be so dramatic!" the boy teased lightly but was happy to lead her towards the living room,</p><p>"Pizza's on the way."</p><p>Bella followed him and as she entered into the cozy house further she found Billy watching sport highlights with the captions on while the audio was practically muted.</p><p>"Hey Billy."</p><p>Her greeting was awkward and a bit halfhearted as the man turned his heavy gaze onto her. For a moment it was like he could see all of her sins laid out before him.</p><p>Billy Black and Bella Swan had an interesting relationship. The man had practically known Bella all her life and his late wife, Sarah, was easily the person she thought of when the word mother was used by anyone in a general sense.</p><p>Sarah had been reliable and steady in a way Renee never was. The woman was a pillar of the Black house, which was why her death had caused Jacob's two older sister's to leave Forks. While Rebecca was living all the way in Hawaii with a husband who was a professional surfer, her twin sister Rachel had thrown herself into he computer engineering courses the first chance she got to attend Washington State.</p><p>The absence of the 3 women were keenly felt.</p><p>Making the matter worse was his knowledge that the Cullens were truly Vampires.</p><p>He was the only Human that knew that she was spending most of her days with a Coven of Animal Drinking Vampires and was likely very keen on finding out why.</p><p>Billy meant well of course. He only wanted Bella to be safe and cared for but it wasn't like she could confess to him that she wanted Carlisle to be the one to do the loving and caring. She couldn't tell him, it wouldn't be fair to Charlie for his friend to know and it wouldn't be wise to be sharing that with the man who was Jacob's father.</p><p>Not when Jacob thought their Tribe's Histories were hokey bedtime stories.</p><p>Ever since the incident with James, Billy had looked at Bella like she was a poor lost soul. A girl who had gotten in over her head needed a hand in getting out.</p><p>"We'll be watching," he'd told her one quiet moment in the months while her broken leg was healing. Jacob had run upstairs to get her an extra blanket for her recovery nest, and Charlie was in the kitchen grabbing a beer for the both of them.</p><p>Bella hadn't known what he meant, but the words had been said a thousand times silently whenever she came down to the Reservation and he was there.</p><p>"Bella," Billy smiled a bit but his eyes were sad as they always seemed to be when she came around recently,</p><p>"It's good to see you here and safe."</p><p>Bela gave him a tight smile and made to sit on the sofa while Jacob tossed himself back happily next to her. His weight jostled the couch which caused her to hiss.</p><p>"Crap! Sorry Bella," Jacob winced as if he'd forgotten her injury, likely because of the thin long sleeve she wore under her polo which covered the wrap. The boy sat up straighter and made to reach out to her but Bella waved him off.</p><p>"It's fine," Bella assured him softly, "I'm fine. Probably just need to take my pain killers again."</p><p>"Jacob told me you fell through a table," Billy informed her kindly, yet there was an edge to his voice and Bella wondered what he theorized really happened. Being aware of Vampires made his pool to draw from practically limitless and Billy wasn't a simple man. Charlie couldn't tolerate idiots.</p><p>No, Billy Black was as sharp as a cracking bull whip and something in his eyes in that moment seemed twice as deadly,</p><p>"And Dr. Cullen fixed you up."</p><p>"Yeah no thanks to her stupid boyfriend," Jacob groused a bit which surprisingly caused his father to frown. Gears turning in his head which Bella needed to put a stop to as quickly as she could.</p><p>"Edward and I aren't dating Jacob, we're just friends," Bella reminded him very promptly with all due exhaustion. Unlike Jessica, he was worth the struggle because she owed him from when they were all little and Bella had forced him to eat a mud pie which had gotten him sick for a week.</p><p>"Bella you know that's hard to believe," Jacob's face was slack and he appeared as tired as she herself felt from her tireless nights,</p><p>"He dragged his dad all the way down to Arizona to bring you back, he's literally the only single guy in that family and you spend so much time with them you're either already dating or will end up dating at some point."</p><p>Bella saw something inside Billy's eyes change and she needed to get out of the conversation quick. As artless as it was she forcibly reminded him,</p><p>"If we're just going to talk about your wild theories about my love life again I'm gonna leave because I came to discuss what kind of junkers to look for."</p><p>"Fine," Jacob practically huffed out defeated for the time being as he more calmly rested back onto his side of the sofa. Finally he very reluctantly followed her recommended topic of conversation,</p><p>"I was thinking something small, maybe a couple of quads or something so we can go out riding together."</p><p>"Quads?" Bella chuckled a bit in disbelief. Carlisle wouldn't mind, he'd worry but he'd trust her not to be irresponsible. Charlie though?</p><p>"Charlie would kill me if I even though of  riding something like that."</p><p>"There's safety gear," Jacob reasoned and Bella had to give it to him, there was such thing as padding and helmets for those sorts of things. Really it was a good idea but a part of her worried about putting herself in more stressful situations when she was having a hard enough time as it was with the Bond being so unable to settle itself.</p><p>But, if she talked to Carlisle about the problem she was sure they'd be able to figure it out.</p><p>Besides that, repairing the things was going to take a while and no doubt by the time whatever recreational vehicles they managed to procure were ready for actually riding, Bella would have found a solution to her issue. As for Charlie's likely disapproval of Bella riding those sort of things, she figured that it was more invested in spending time with Jacob than the actual vehicles.</p><p>In 5 years it wasn't going to matter and riding the damn thing would probably be fun. Jasper had a Ducati and if she enjoyed whatever she and Jacob ended up repairing together maybe it would be a way of bonding with the empath down the line.</p><p>And wasn't that a strange thought?</p><p>Bella realized would have to ask Carlisle for permission to store her's in his portion of the garage and make sure to only ride slowly in the meantime even if it got her laughed at a bit. Jacob was nice enough to understand and not really be offended by her caution.</p><p> </p><p>"We'll see," Bella acquiesced partially only because Billy was there still listening. Watching her as if he had transcended even Edwards inability to read her mind,</p><p>"But if you want a quad we can get you a quad, maybe even a dirt bike, whatever fits in our budget."</p><p>"You'll see," Jacob smiled as he leaned over and poked her forehead obnoxiously as if he was 4, "I'ts gonna be awesome and by the time I'm through with you, Bella Swan will be a real life grease monkey."</p><p>That was enough to draw a laugh out of her at the though. If that was the consequence so be it, she'd rather be a bit of a grease monkey than have to bother Jacob to repair The Beast when it eventually decided to quit on her.</p><p>"Alright, should I get a pair of overalls and a pink tool set?" Bella teased a bit which had him shaking his head in quite the long suffering manner,</p><p>"First I'll teach you how to change a tire. Then we can talk about tool sets."</p><p>"Sound like a plan," she agreed.</p><p>And it did.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0005"><h2>5. Chapter 5</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>This for all of you hopeless romantics that suffered through Equinox and shouted in triumph literally of figuratively when these two finally kissed.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Bella's difficulty sleeping persisted for the rest of the week.</p><p>It didn't help that none of the Cullens showed up for school even though it was cloudy as any other day. While Bella knew only Edward was in town to attend, the rest of the students were buzzing about what could have made the 3 Cullens vanish.</p><p>Fortunately no one was brave enough to approach Bella about it, she was after all the only person who could possibly know, but between the thing with Jessica that was about to over-boil and everyone's weirdness about her friendship with Edward, she was off limits for information.</p><p>That didn't mean she and Carlisle hadn't worked out what she'd say if someone asked.</p><p>Which was fortunate because on Monday, while Bella was making herself and Charlie a quick scramble with left over sausages and potatoes from Sunday, he was quick to ask about it when a silver Volvo arrived on the curb outside.</p><p>"I thought Alice drove you to school on Mondays," Charlie observed sipping on his coffee, and part of Bella knew that he'd memorized the Cullens rotation. How could he not?</p><p>They were smooth as clockwork and while her dad wasn't normally around when they picked her up, he definitely saw her dropped off by whomever was scheduled on Guard duty for the day.</p><p>"Alice and Jasper went up north to see some relatives," Bella explained as she lowered the fire and, as was her routine, made her way over to the door and unlocked it. She ignored Charlie's raised eyebrow as she ambled back over to the stove,</p><p>"It's just for a while I think Alice said something about an estranged aunt being really sick."</p><p>"And her brother didn't want to go with her?" Charlie sounded a bit surprised and Bella forced herself to remember that her dad was referring to Emmett and not the copper haired Vampire very casually ambling up her driveway.</p><p>"Well she was estranged and Emmett isn't the kind to really look back," Bella shrugged as she finished the scramble and began to serve it with the toast which had already been buttered and laid out on the table.</p><p>Edward, entered the house casually as could be. Bella realized very early on that the Cullens didn't like knocking. It was...</p><p>A thing.</p><p>Something tiny and inhuman that she was sure should be unsettling but had just become routine. While she'd never asked, Bella had reasoned that because of their very keen sense of hearing they always knew when someone was coming. At best it was it was grating to have someone banging around trying to get your attention when you already knew they were there.</p><p>At worst it was probably like tapping on a fish bowl, them being the fish who had to just ride out the awful waves.</p><p>"Good morning Chief Swan," Edward greeted as he took off his sunglasses and Bella noted they were both unnecessary as well as ridiculously fancy.</p><p>"Edward," Charlie replied evenly, a bit wary of the boy as of he was about to grab Bella and run out the door to never be seen again at any moment.</p><p>"You're really early," Bella observed as she served her father's plate and as she made her way to the fridge in order to pour her morning glass of orange juice she tried not to laugh as she offered,</p><p>"There's some scramble in the pan still if you want some."</p><p>Charlie sipped his coffee as he eyeballed Edward who sat himself down gingerly at the table with a bit of a smile that was clearly full promised of vengeance as he huffed out,</p><p>"I already ate, thanks."</p><p>Bella made her way over to the table and placed her orange juice down only for Edward to stand up, so that he could pull her chair out for her like the proper boy from the 1910s that he was. He seemed to realize what he'd done a bit late as Bella slowly sunk down into the chair,</p><p>"Thank you Edward."</p><p>"Mmmhmmm," Edward replied a bit awkwardly returning to his own seat while Charlie looked at them both like they'd just started an entire production of My Fair Lady complete with costumes and dance routines.</p><p>Charlie seemed to shake the action off as he began eating his breakfast.</p><p>"So there a reason you came early?" Bella asked picking up her own fork in order to scoop up her mix of scrambled eggs, sausage, and potatoes,</p><p>"Because having you here to watch me eat is practically straight out of a horror movie."</p><p>Bella tried to ignore Charlie's interest in Edward's reply as the Vampire boy sort of just folded his arms on the small table with a tiny shrug,</p><p>"I may or may not have your illegal birthday present in my pocket."</p><p>She'd forgotten about that.</p><p>Really, who could blame her after everything that had happened that night? The cake was a tragic casualty and Bella was more worried about Jasper, and then Alice's Vision of her dying, than she was about a present that could apparently fit in Edward's pea coat.</p><p>"Illegal?" Charlie piped in a bit confused and Bella shoved a huge forkful of eggs into her mouth and stared Edward down so that he was forced to explain. An act which had the boy give a bit of a forced chuckle.</p><p>"Bella said we were only allowed to get her one present for her birthday," Edward very slowly explained as if everything hinged on the way he worded his answer. Bella thought that it just might actually so she payed careful attention to the Vampire's words,</p><p>"So we got her the necklace she's wearing but Carlisle didn't know about her rule and got her these."</p><p>Edward pulled an envelope out of his pocket then and placed it on the table between Bella orange juice and her father's coffee. Charlie looked at the thing like it was about to explode or something equally heinous.</p><p>Bella swallowed her eggs and took a drink of her orange juice before finally putting Edward out of his misery and grabbing the gift his siblings had all decided to infringe on her rights with.</p><p>She was glad she'd cleared her mouth, as when Bella opened the unsealed envelope she found herself staring at two round trip tickets to Jacksonville with write in dates,</p><p>"Edward what the hell is wrong with you guys?"</p><p>Charlie's gaze was sharp as her turned to her, practically oozing protectiveness he gently took the gift from her hand and examined the tickets himself, before very skeptically asking,</p><p>"Dr. Cullen bought these?"</p><p>"They're for Bella and Alice, or Jacob," Edward shrugged a bit more nonchalantly than the pricey gift required, and in that moment Bella hated him so much she would have refused his ride to school if there wasn't a crazed Vampire after her.</p><p>"No," Bella didn't care that it was rude as she yanked the tickets out of Charlie's hand and shoved them at her kind of step- son,</p><p>"I can't take these, it's way too much."</p><p>"They cost less than your necklace Bella it's fine," Edward assured her but Bella suddenly felt like her soul was leaving her body over the fact that her tiny little Polaris cost more than a direct, round trip across the entire country for two.</p><p>Charlie choked.</p><p>Bella wished she could bore holes into Edward's brain with her mind for giving her the tickets in front of her father. He probably had a reason but she didn't care about it if he was going to be throwing around how much it all cost. Really it was very likely he was trying to bully her into taking them like Alice had done with the dress.</p><p>"Edward, I appreciate the sentiment but I can't."</p><p>"Bella, how many times are you going to be able to see your mom during your years at college?" Edward asked suddenly, urgently, and what the Cullen kids gift meant was starting to sink in,</p><p>"And I know your applying to places in New England and Britain when you get out of your community courses. So it's gonna be a bit of a trip even after you graduate.</p><p>"Especially if your going to be doing post grad programs."</p><p>"Bella doesn't know what her major is gonna be yet," Charlie reminded him a bit uncomfortably. No doubt agreeing with her rejection of the pricey gift but unsure of how to display the support. Edward frowned slightly though as her father spoke and suddenly Bella felt naked. For once she wished the boy could read her mind as everything in her screamed for him to keep his mouth shut and say absolutely nothing.</p><p>"You didn't tell him?"</p><p>Bella didn't want to talk about it, she only ever allowed herself to even THINK about it when she was alone with Carlisle and she could pretend that the world consisted of only them. Where she could imagine her future as his wife and the way they'd live when her blood lust had cooled and she was stable enough to work with teenagers on a regular basis.</p><p>Immediately Bella got to her feet and grabbed her half finished plate of food before making her way to the kitchen in a rush.</p><p>"Bella what the hell is he talking about?" Charlie looked between them like she was about to tell him they were getting married right out of high school. Which, she wouldn't mind to much if it was a very different Cullen, but that was besides the point.</p><p>"I can't believe you Edward," Bella put her plate on the counter and scrapped the contents of it into a small disposable paper bowl she'd grabbed from the cupboard. Suddenly she was overwhelmed with his siblings insistence on treating her like this when Humans were around.</p><p>"I don't see why you're acting like this is a big deal," Edward frowned clearly not understanding the boundary he'd just barreled over willy-nilly and very quietly something inside her snapped.</p><p>Pivoting around on her heel for God and Charlie to witness Bella pointed her spatula at the boy and warned,</p><p>"Edward Cullen I'm going to tell your father about this. You know he doesn't like it when you all start bullying me into things before I've decided if I want to do them or not!</p><p>"You know I haven't told my dad about it yet because I haven't even made a decision! I have half a mind to drive myself to school!"</p><p>Immediately she regretted the tone she'd taken as Edward's golden eyes widened and he ducked his head like a little boy cowed from being told off for dragging mud into the house. Edward's reaction wasn't what had her feeling sick though, it was Charlie's still silence as he stared between them.</p><p>Witnessing a glimpse into the truth.</p><p>Bella was in charge and that was on full display as Edward very apologetically whispered, "Sorry Bella."</p><p>It was silent for a moment as the scene settled over them and Charlie refused to move as if reality would break should he budge even an inch.</p><p>"I'm thinking about getting a degree in Theater Arts," Bella declared suddenly so that Charlie was in the loop. They were words she hadn't really said out loud to anyone, but Carlisle had likely assumed and Edward had gleaned it with his telepathy.</p><p>She couldn't help but think there was no privacy in this goddamn family.</p><p>"You're not even in drama anymore," Charlie was gaping and, yeah, Bella had dropped drama for senior year so she could have half days. It had been a loosely cobbled together plan as the dreams of a little girl was glimpsed as a possibility and her tiny little heart had ran with it.</p><p>She had forever to figure out if that was what she actually wanted but it was something to try. A dream revived as it joined hands with Bella's brand new one of spending forever with Carlisle and his family. She couldn't take dance yet, but that would come later, first she needed a solid background in theater that she'd been neglecting.</p><p>"When my seasonal work is done at Newton's I can join Drama Club," She explained a bit tensely not sure how to even begin with the conversation.</p><p>It wasn't something she was supposed to be talking about with Charlie for a very long time, probably not even until she was able to gradually turn him over to her thinking. Maybe even not at all if she decided to just go forward with a degree in Classic Lit.</p><p>Edward though was determined to make her life a living hell, apparently.</p><p>"And when I graduate I can take a year at Community College to get my Art Credits up so I can get into a good University," Bella finished telling him her extremely rough plans for that particular course of action.</p><p>She made her way back to the table with her breakfast in hand complete with a picnic fork, as she took hold of her backpack. The signal was enough to have Edward on his feet to ready to follow her lead.</p><p>"What brought all this on?" Charlie was clearly confused and a bit frazzled by the sudden decision for Bella to pursue a degree in fine arts instead of literature like he and Renee likely thought she would. There was little doubt that her parents had expected her to be an English teacher who wrote a light novel or two.</p><p>Which she still might do.</p><p>After all she might just live a thousand lives.</p><p>"I just-" Bella wished that this wasn't how it had all come out, that Edward hand't been an absolute brat and caused this,</p><p>"Literature is fun, I love it but I don't know if I want to make a career out of it. This is just another option to think about.</p><p>"So Theater and maybe one day dance. Nothings for sure, I haven't even really made any solid plans yet it's just an idea."</p><p>It sounded insane because Charlie hadn't known.</p><p>Nobody had known that secret thing in her heart she had only spoken once in response to Carlisle's deep prompt.</p><p>
  <em>"Tell me something about yourself you've never told anyone else."</em>
</p><p>Charlie glanced at Edward a bit and Bella wished that she was the telepath and could know what the man was thinking as he sighed,</p><p>"You know, we'll talk about this later. In the mean time I don't want you to be late for school."</p><p>"Yeah," Bella nodded shortly and actually reached out to give Edwards unyielding form a light shove which he allowed to move him.</p><p>"And don't think you distracted me!" Bella hissed at the copper haired boy as she scooped the tickets for Jacksonville off the table,</p><p>"I"m taking these but you're paying for them in ways you can't even conceive yet."</p><p>Edward maintained his contrite silence as Bella said her goodbyes to Charlie and guided the way out of the Swan house leaving her father to eat his breakfast in absolute confusion over everything that had just unfolded in front of him. The boy shuffled stifly and as he opened the car door for her Bella just glared,</p><p>"The absolute nerve."</p><p>Loading herself in Bella pulled her buckle on while Edward closed the door and performed a Human jog over to his side of the vehicle and sliding into the driver's seat.</p><p>"I wasn't trying to make you upset."</p><p>"But you did," Bella informed him trying to keep herself from yelling. She wasn't going to be the kind of person who yelled in situations like this. Her voice came out tight as a result, "And that's not an apology."</p><p>Starting the car Edward let out a stream of air, "I'm sorry I brought up your plans for college with Charlie before you wanted to and put you in an uncomfortable position."</p><p>"And?" Bella prompted further suddenly her chest was pulsing with need, "What else did you <em>just do</em> in front of my father?!"</p><p>"I'm sorry I disrespected you," Edward sounded so uneasy over it but Bella felt like it needed to be said, because they kept doing it. Over and over and Bella realized that Carlisle was right. They only did it because she never scolded them.</p><p>So it had come to this.</p><p>Her scolding Edward.</p><p>"I can't believe I said that in front of him! Like- Like I'm your mother!" Bella cradled her face in her hands as Edward finally pulled away from he curb,</p><p>"What does he even think now?!"</p><p>"He's always been pretty difficult to read," Edward informed her softly with a tinge of regret, "I get loose ideas and tone but nothing beyond that from him."</p><p>There was a silent moment before he added, "And you are my mother Bella."</p><p>She didn't know if she was going to laugh or cry but Edward kept driving and the weight of everything kept pressing down on Bella until she let out a horrible whine like an injured fox. Of course she knew, but it was still something she was getting used to. Because the only time she'd ever taken charge was in the privacy of their family, never in front of Humans, especially not her father!</p><p>"I didn't know you had all that stuff planned already," Edward whispered as if trying to lift her mood but Bella just grit her teeth and was surprised when she actually snarled at him,</p><p>"Because I haven't told Carlisle yet Edward."</p><p>"Oh," Edward spoke uncomfortably, clearly realizing the actual gravity of what he'd just did. Bella just wished he wasn't the way he was all the time.</p><p>"And what makes it all worse is that Alice usually picks me up on Mondays," Bella informed him still covering her face in misery as her feelings just continued to pour out,</p><p>"So I feel like I'm being ungrateful because you're pulling double duty now."</p><p>"Bella you don't have to feel guilty," Edward sighed and seemed to be scrambling to think of what to say,</p><p>"Emmett will be picking up Alice's shifts starting next week, I actually came to pick you up to explain what happened with Jasper a bit better for you."</p><p>"I got cut, he was thirsty," Bella finally lifted her head from her palms determined not to cry like a fool,</p><p>"There's not much to explain."</p><p>But there was. The more Bella had thought about it the more strange the whole incident had seemed.</p><p>"I can see you thinking," Edward sounded nervous but pressed forwards rather stalwartly, "Ask your questions. Go on."</p><p>He was offering, so Bella took a breath and decided she shouldn't waste the opportunity to get a grasp on his insights. Especially regarding aspects of their lives she was still learning about.</p><p>"How come one little cut set him off when he spent practically all day at school with hundreds of kids being knocked about all day?" were the words that finally came out of her as she temporarily put her upset aside.</p><p>"You remember that day in Port Angeles? When Jasper and I picked you up?" Edward prompted and Bella did remember that day. The brothers had probably saved her life and been more forthcoming than ever before.</p><p>"When Jasper made fun of me for being alright in a car full of Vampires when he knew damn well the Bond had already shut off my fear response to your Species?" Bella replied a bit tartly as she suddenly reflected on that day with her current level of knowledge,</p><p>"Yeah."</p><p>"I also said you were the best thing I've ever smelled in over 100 years, that your blood calls to me." Edward reminded her and that was pretty creepy, sure. The copper haired boy trudged on,</p><p>"You smell really good to everyone, but for me you're like... Excuse the term but it's like a hit of heroine every time I get your scent.</p><p>"Jasper lost it because your particular allure. Then I hurt you and I increased the risk even more."</p><p>Bella shook her head. She understood of course, that she apparently smelled like a special tasty treat to him, it was sort of horrifying, but she wouldn't accept that at face value,</p><p>"But you'd never actually kill me Edward. Your whole family has chosen again and again to drink from Animals."</p><p>"I've killed people before Bella," Edward sounded like he was pleading with her to understand and she tried her best as he kept on, "All of us, except for Carlisle, have killed people."</p><p>"Those were accidents," Bella reasoned, she knew them, they weren't murderers running rampant and Edward wasn't about to scare her off.</p><p>"Not for me," Edward revealed suddenly as he gripped the steering wheel and Bella would have thought he was using his full strength if he wasn't superhuman,</p><p>"I once rebelled, not long after I was Created I couldn't stand the life Carlisle had made for us. So I went out to see what it was like to hunt.</p><p>"Mostly I'd stalk theaters and alleyways for rapists, murderers, thieves, any criminal I could justify myself playing Judge, Jury ,and, Executioner for."</p><p>"That must have been a very hard time for you," Bella felt a lump forming in her throat at the thought of Edward wanting to try Human blood and actually wading through the dark minds of the worst of Humanity just for a taste,</p><p>"Seeing into those people's twisted minds so deeply just to be sure. It must have driven you half mad."</p><p>How powerful Blood Lust had to be to make a kind boy like him turn so desperate.</p><p>"Bella I killed people," Edward hissed at her and she let out a long breath. There was a million things she could say, no doubt he wanted her condemnation. Was he telling her this to give her a reason to yell at him?</p><p>No. This was about what had happened with Jasper. On some level, perhaps Edward was trying to instill rational fear in her since the Bond wouldn't allow a natural one. Otherwise this was about something else she couldn't place.</p><p>"I know that Edward," Bella swallowed back her upset at his attempts to control her view of himself with fear,</p><p>"But you can't change that. We can only think about all the people you saved and hope that they did enough good to make up the difference."</p><p>Watery was the laugh he let out, it was desperate and almost weak, "How can you say that?! You're mad at me and you just say stuff that makes you sound like you're practically ancient."</p><p>"Edward," Bella sighed and began to use her fingers to massage her temple, "Just because I'm angry with you doesn't mean I don't still care about you.</p><p>"What is this really about? I can't read your mind. You need to just tell me why all this? The tickets, and the telling Charlie, you driving me with the confession.</p><p>"It's not you. Are you trying to get me to yell at you and scream? Condemn you? Because it's not going to happen."</p><p>She took the moment to shove her picnic fork into her paper bowl before shoveling scramble into her mouth. Careful not to spill it anywhere.</p><p>"Maybe I just want you to be mad at someone," Edward sighed finally confessing what had been actually bothering him,</p><p>"It's not Jasper's fault he's been at this for less time than the rest of us."</p><p>"And it's not your fault either," she said after swallowing her food, Edward was a strange boy and it seemed he carried a lot of guilt she was't aware of,</p><p>"I told Carlisle that we have to expect accidents to happen. It's natural. I'm Human."</p><p>Silence reigned over the car for the rest of the drive and when Bella finished her food she just held the empty little bowl in her lap until Edward pulled into his parking spot at the school.</p><p>He reached over and took her paper bowl before she realized something and it brought such pain in Bella's heart that she felt like she might cry, "Edward please don't tell me you've just been bottling this up since the party."</p><p>Gritting his teeth the boy moved to open his door but stopped short.</p><p>"I was so scared we were going to lose you," Edward whispered with such fragility Bella wrapped her fingers around his wrist, the one that was holding her trash, as he continued,</p><p>"Carlisle's just insisting on moving forward and Rosalie is acting like this all proves she's right while Emmett's been acting like ever things going to be fine.</p><p>"Who am I supposed to tell? When I can see everyone around me is either minimizing everything, or acting like this is the end of the world in an attempt to cope? Who do I talk to?"</p><p>"Me," Bella replied and realized that she meant it with everything inside of her, "If you feel like you can't talk to Carlisle you talk to me.</p><p>"It's my job to worry remember?"</p><p>Once more he huffed out a vulnerable laugh, "Yeah, that's why you're my mom."</p><p>It was the second time he'd said the words without jest and humor. All the other times it had been said by any of the kids there was always a tone of joking or levity but this? The moment was real and true.</p><p>Edward had accepted that she was his father's Mate and that made Bella his mother.</p><p>"Yeah, I am.</p><p>"Which means I'm still going to tell your father what you did."</p><p>Edward snorted.</p><p> </p><hr/><p> </p><p>"You know, everything I know about chess I learned from the computer game," Bella informed Carlisle from her place sitting across a completely set up as well as half played board,</p><p>"I used to play it between loads of laundry as a break from cleaning back in Phoenix."</p><p>They were sitting together with a small pop up card table between them, a top the flat surface was a beautiful glass chess set that Bella couldn't help but think was a piece of art. Carlisle's soldiers were the 'blacks' but the color of them was a translucent sea green while Bella's whites were pure clear glass.</p><p>Emmett was campaigning on whatever shoot em up game he was playing on his Xbox while Edward backseat gamed since he wasn't allowed into the music room for the rest of the week due to the ludicrous display with Charlie on Monday. Which to be fair was a self imposed exile so it wasn't something Bella felt guilty over. Though she was concerned over Edward's need to self recriminate.</p><p>Just as much as she worried over the fact that the morning in question had ended up being another display that Charlie had internalized and never brought up.</p><p>Rosalie, according to the boys, was happily tinkering away in the garage and wasn't likely to come out any time soon.</p><p>"And how did you fair?" Carlisle smiled as he made his next move, his ocher eyes twinkling like sunlight with what had to be amusement because Bella knew enough that she could see he was about to destroy her miserably.</p><p>"About the same as I'm doing now."</p><p>Like magic they both said, "Poorly."</p><p>Which caused Bella to snort a laugh and place her hand up on her forehead at the word. It was nice to spend time together, even if the absence of Alice and Jasper was felt everywhere she looked. Bella couldn't tell herself they were hunting and it was impossible to pretend they were just somewhere else in the house.</p><p>"The more you play the better you'll do," Carlisle insisted kindly and Bella gave him a look which no doubt conveyed exactly what she thought about that,</p><p>"I aint gonna be in shape for the tournament Chief."</p><p>The man chuckled but his eyes were intent on her as he watched Bella move her next piece on the board,</p><p>"You're doing just fine for a beginner."</p><p>"So all my years of training against the computer mean nothing?" Bella teased which caused Carlisle to smile with all of his teeth as he shook his head at her refusal to be serious.</p><p>He was dressed casually in a pair of black jeans and an oxford whose sleeves were rolled up and Bella tried to keep herself from admiring his well toned arms more than she should. Yet her eyes kept going to them each time he reached up and moved one of his chess pieces.</p><p>"Perhaps it would mean something if you weren't so distracted," the very wicked man replied and Bella's mouth was suddenly dry as he gaze at her through his honey colored lashes.</p><p>There was no way he was doing it on purpose, Carlisle had given her a gentle kiss to welcome her back into his home but had done nothing more.</p><p>Her slow seduction was occurring in Bella's brain as it was being filled with hormones which were making her insides feel like they were slowly becoming jellified the longer the table was between them.</p><p>"Well I haven't been sleeping to well, so I guess that could be part of it," Bella willed that to be the reason, and not the fact that Carlisle seemed to get more and more desirable the longer they were apart.</p><p>Her stomach was beginning to churn as he tilted his head at her while a concerned expression over took his features. A tightness like a spring pulled taught was starting to form deep inside her while Bella felt like she was hot and cold all at once.</p><p>It was like she was slowly going mad and seeing Carlisle through a non-Bonded Human brain and losing it from his Vampiric beauty. Her skin was buzzing like a thousand ants while her chest pulsed like a phantom heartbeat filling the empty spaces between her own.</p><p>Carlisle swallowed hard.</p><p>And Bella realized it was happening to him too.</p><p>"Are you having nightmares?" Carlisle's tone was soft, concerned and clearly truly worried for her but there was a smoldering fire in his eyes that Bella couldn't really ignore.</p><p>"It's just," Bella reminded herself that she had been planning to tell him about this for some time and now the opportunity was perfect. Even if her brain was slowly shutting down,</p><p>"Every time I start to drift off the Bond begins to ache and feel cold. I'm sure it's nothing but It's terrifying and I barely sleep most nights."</p><p>"When's the last time you had a full night's rest?" the strange fire in his gaze was cooling as the man's concern grew. Bella wondered at his ability to focus while she couldn't stop her eyes from drifting to his lips while they formed words,</p><p>"On my birthday when you were next to me."</p><p>"All right," Edward suddenly stood up from his place on the couch and jostled Emmett's shoulder roughly catching the couple's attention immediately,</p><p>"C'mon Emmett, you and I are going for a run and maybe a rematch for last week is in order."</p><p>The larger Vampire looked at his brother oddly before casting a barely there glance in the direction of the pair who were playing chess. Emmett smiled, and it was lopsided with a hint of knowing that made Bella want to throw her king at him.</p><p>"Yeah alright," Emmett paused his game as he stood before using the remote to turn of the TV, his smile still leaning toward lecherous as he waggled his eyebrows at Bella which caused her to huff out a laugh before returning her attention back to Carlisle. Only to find him smiling at her lightly, as if Emmett's teasing didn't' phase him one bit.</p><p>While it had Bella blushing madly.</p><p>In no time the two boys were out of the house and practically blurring their way into the forest.</p><p>Bella knew they need to talk but when Carlisle lifted the card table with one hand to removed it from between them, only to offer his other hand, she fell into him. As tightly as her feeble human strength could she reached out and linked her finger with his own only for Carlisle to pick her up like a princess.</p><p>It was a lot.</p><p>But when he kissed her right then and there in the living room, holding her like a blushing bride the feeling of ants marching on her skin faded. Reverently she brought her hand that wasn't around his back to cup his neck as she rather softly played with the hairs that fell behind his ear.</p><p>"Do you mind going to the bedroom?" Carlisle whispered against her lips as he pulled away and Bella inhaled sharply but knew that he just wanted more privacy from Rosalie who was in the garage,</p><p>"I don't mind."</p><p>Bella knew as they walked slowly in silence that there was a talk to be had but her heart was pounding like a freight train while his cold slender fingers practically kept dancing where they cradled her. He kept kissing her temple and something inside her had Bella lightly caressing his jaw and chin with her finger tips.</p><p>An almost fatal need to be connected to him, deeper and deeper.</p><p>Carlisle placed her on the bed completely before very gingerly untying her shoes and pulling them off like some sort of reverse Cinderella situation. Then, he casually kicked off his own black loafers as he climbed onto the bed next to her like a lumbering panther.</p><p>Inhaling softly Bella tried to quell the intense buzzing of electricity which was drawing her to him like a lightening rod as Carlisle cradled her to himself as he had the night of her birthday party.</p><p>"Are you comfortable?" He asked carefully and Bella leaned into his completely frigid, yet somehow soothing form.</p><p>"Completely," Bella sighed as something in her loosened. While he was cool to the touch the place he dwelt withing her was finally beginning to fully warm in a way it hadn't since the night of her party,</p><p>"But that'll change when I have to go home."</p><p>"Perhaps then it's time to entertain a particular fantasy you shared some time ago," Carlisle offered and she took a moment to think before pressing her lips together in a suppressed smile as she realized what he was rather loosely offering her.</p><p>"You mean you want to sneak into my room and watch me sleep?" she couldn't help the chuckle that bubbled up in her as her mind truly formed what that would mean,</p><p>"Carlisle, you can't possibly do that every night. What about when you need to do a late shift?"</p><p>"Then I can at least check on you during my lunch," he reasoned and Bella was beginning to see that it was a viable plan. An unconventional one for sure but it was functional in theory.</p><p>"Well if Charlie finds you he's going to be livid," Bella reminded him of their very precarious situation As nice as having Carlisle with her every night to soothe her sleep, they needed to be rational about this.</p><p>Bella never locked her door unless it was to get dressed, that was how she functioned as she didn't have anything to hide. So it would be a bit weird to suddenly start doing it every night.</p><p>"I'm sure I'll be perfectly able to hear him coming and act accordingly," was the rather true response. Carlisle had his senses and speed on his side, so Bella pressed the side of her face to his chest and listened to his still heart which now impossibly beat inside of her as she declared,</p><p>"Alright, let's try it."</p><p>"How do you want to go about it?" Carlisle asked casually as if he wasn't talking about breaking into the Chief of Police's house to lay in bed with his barely legal daughter.</p><p>Which, Bella had to hold back a laugh about, because this was so reckless it was ridiculous,</p><p>"Well first we should go on a date, I've always wanted to try ice skating."</p><p>Carlisle huffed out a chuckle before kissing her softly. it was slow and patient as most of their kissed had been, it left her filled yet wanting all in the same stroke.</p><p>"I'll work on arranging Ice skating," he assured her as she pulled away from him so that she could breath,</p><p>"Until then, I would like to get you sleeping sufficiently as soon as possible."</p><p>"So I'll leave my window unlocked waiting for a creature of the night," Bella suddenly felt bold as she pushed herself up and kissed him with more heat than they had shared since prom. He responded equally to her and Bella found herself pulling away slightly as she gasped,</p><p>"I want to- I- Carlisle I want to taste you."</p><p>"Good lord," he whispered with such worshipful awe Bella thought he might run away before he moved to close the distance between them once more, this time he opened his mouth slightly and Bella followed suit allowing him entrance and meeting his ministrations with equal fervor. </p><p>She found him oddly sweet like tea which had been stirred with cinnamon, which was strange to her as Bella knew that the taste was his Venom as she carefully did her best not to scrape herself on his teeth.</p><p>It was strange and a bit awkward at first at the pair attempted to find a rhythm.</p><p>Bella may have laughed as she accidentally knocked their noses together in a mockery of kunik but in the end they found an easy pace for them to intensify their affections.</p><p>It was funny, she thought, as Bella gripped his button up and pulled herself flush against him while Carlisle practically fumbled in order to move so that she was resting more on top of him than beside, that she had never realized how fun making out could be.</p><p>Carlisle's over cautious hands never groped or grabbed, they were content to caress her arms, face, and hair while Bella felt herself bold as her own fingers finally explored her Mates shirt covered chest as well as his strong arms when they weren't running through his silken strands of hair. Part of her wondered at his slight floundering when it came to how to touch her as if he was unsure or as uneasy as Bella herself.</p><p>It made her wonder if he wasn't as worldly as she had believed. Nearly 400 years was a very long time to be alone and Bella didn't doubt that he had eased his struggle with others, but his tentative touches, shy, and nearly afraid mirrored her own in a startling fashion.</p><p>Still though, their time spent together, slowly becoming acquainted in the smallest of ways was an occasion that she would think on for a very longtime to come.</p><p>This was more than they had agreed on but Bella was hungry and Carlisle was equally eager to drink her down so long as it remained fairly innocent with fleeting shy touches.</p><p>It was enough.</p><p>As they both agreed to stop so as not to tempt passion further, and Bella rested against him for a small nap she sighed contentedly.</p><p>For the time being it was enough.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0006"><h2>6. Chapter 6</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Teenage romance bites, but stay in school kids.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>It was like a strange dream come true to have Carlisle Cullen climbing through her window on that Thursday evening as Charlie was already asleep down the hall.</p><p>Bella knew better than to tempt fate, so she dressed herself in her normal vest shirt and gym short pajama combo and hoped for the best.</p><p>And the best did in fact arrive as she watched the man himself, quiet as church mouse, slide opened her bedroom window before climbing in from the tree just outside of it. He moved so gracefully that Bella couldn't help the smile which formed on her face as he shut the window softly before turning to her with a light grin.</p><p>"Welcome to my parlor," Bella whispered from her place laying back on her bed, the word were said under her breath knowing his delicate ears would pick her them up loud and clear.</p><p>"You will find that I am no fly and neither are you a spider," Carlisle replied as he crept slowly across her bedroom floor. He was in a plain t-shirt and jeans which was the most casual thing he'd worn as even his hiking clothes had consisted of athletic gear.</p><p>"Perhaps we're both caught in a web," Bella shrugged before finding herself lounging in bed accompanied by the man who had kissed her within an inch of her life just hours before.</p><p>He pressed his lips to her forehead and after having been so close earlier that day, Bella was happy to find her mind calm, completely unaltered as she gazed upon him as he made himself at home on her bed. No longer was his beauty overwhelming but once again comfortingly calm like a summer breeze.</p><p>She happily tucked herself into him as she had every time before, letting out a sigh in contentment.</p><p>"Rest Darling, you have many hours to catch up on," Carlisle whispered as he kissed the top of her hair. As he did Bella found that her senses filled with him. His scent of old leather and antiseptic, as well as the feel of his lower temperature pressed along side her, was a combination which had her eyes growing heavy with sleep in no time at all.</p><p>When morning came, the low beams of light danced across her room and Bella woke to find herself still in Carlisle's arms. It was almost as if he hadn't moved or even breathed in all the hours she rested and Bella felt something comforting at the thought of him being there as a silent but watchful sentinel.</p><p>"We have to tell Charlie," was the first thing out of her mouth, even as it was uttered groggily with barely with any level of volume.</p><p>"Good morning to you too," Carlisle replied easily but with a modicum of surprise laced in his quiet tone, "What brought this on?"</p><p>"You were right," she sighed a bit and Bella knew she was risking him not coming back or kissing her like that again, but he had set his boundaries as well as requirements for when they made love and they were teetering close to breaking them,</p><p>"If you're going to keep coming here at night to help me sleep I know that eventually, with everything else, it's going to start eating me alive."</p><p>Wasn't that funny? It was one thing to think you wouldn't mind, but as soon as they were sort of forced to wade a bit deeper into their relationship that it turned out that she, in fact, very much minded.</p><p>Hadn't they just agreed not to go further and now Bella felt like they were tumbling rather naturally down a precarious rabbit hole.</p><p>"You're regretting yesterday," Carlisle swallowed and Bella's heart ached at that.</p><p>"Not yesterday, and not this," Bella assured him firmly, still trying to be quiet, she didn't regret it one bit but with all the other goings on, as well as the lies, tension was starting to pile up,</p><p>"Carlisle I just- I don't want to hide you. I want to go on a day trip to Port Angeles to see the aquarium without worrying about people seeing us.</p><p>"I want to tell Charlie so I don't have to keep lying about how much I love you. There's no reason to start shouting it in the streets but he's my dad, he deserves to know.</p><p>"Besides I'm pretty sure he suspects somethings going on."</p><p>Carlisle sat up slowly so as not to make too much noise and Bella realized that Charlie must still be in the house which was a terrifying notion as he murmured to her,</p><p>"If you truly want to tell him we have to make plans for it. There's a very real chance he'll forbid contact."</p><p>Maneuvering herself so that she too was sitting up and her back was against her headboard Bella turned her eyes to meet her Mate's. Pouring all her worry out she replied,</p><p>"I'm not leaving you Carlisle. I promised."</p><p>"I don't want you abandoning your father," Carlisle whispered as he rested his cheek atop her head lightly,</p><p>"Charlie is a good man and he doesn't deserve that."</p><p>Bella knew that he was right. She didn't want to just throw herself into the Cullen's house. It would make people start talking and they didn't need that level of attention with everything else that was happening.</p><p>With her being 18 they could likely weather the storm, but what they really needed to minimize the risk completely was Charlie's blessing. Which Bella really didn't think would be happening, at least, not at first.</p><p>"If he says no," Bella was tentative with her words and knew that they were going to sound almost cruel, but she was perfectly aware that she was being selfish and had moved past caring,</p><p>"We can take a weekend in Seattle or something and try and talk again when he's calmed down."</p><p>"That's a start," Carlisle agreed lightly but it was clear that he was nervous over the topic they were inching towards fully exploring,</p><p>"I believe a family meeting is in order to discuss this more fully. In the meantime I believe it would be reckless to stay longer.</p><p>"Especially since I have my shift in only a few hours."</p><p>Bella couldn't disagree with any of that, particularly with the need to call for a family meeting. After all, this would effect the entire Cullen family. Because it was the first real step towards everything coming out publicly.</p><p>They could show no weaknesses.</p><p>Charlie was going to have to see that his family had no problems with the relationship . It would ultimately be a test run for things to come. When every single one of them would be facing scrutiny over the fact that Dr. Cullen was dating the Police Chief's 18 year old daughter.</p><p>Every member of the Cullen Clan would have to present a united front if they wanted to weather the small town storm that would be kicked up by it.</p><p>Bella prayed in her heart that Charlie would come around before things came out. That he would be wiling to stand by her and allow his respect for Carlisle to win out against the fact that he believed the Doctor was 32.</p><p>"Yeah, alright" Bella kissed him lightly and found comfort in the developing familiarity of it before she sighed,</p><p>"Be safe on your way down the tree."</p><p>His departure was just a quiet as his entrance and when Carlisle had completely cleared out of her room, the memory of his presence was practically dream like. Bella leaned back onto her sheets and inhaled the remnants of him which were left behind and knew that they were trudging close to falling into that fathomless pit.</p><p>Less than half an hour later her alarm sounded and Charlie could be heard shuffling around down the hall in the manner he always did when he had the day shift.</p><p>Bella took her time to shower, change her gauze, and get dressed in clothes that wouldn't be too hard to maneuver in. By the time that was done she was on her way downstairs to make a quick breakfast that for both herself and Charlie to eat.</p><p>Since he had work a breakfast sandwich of ham, egg, and cheese would have to do. It was simple and could be wrapped in foil to be enjoyed when he got into the station.</p><p>Bella hummed to herself a song that she was sure didn't actually exist as she made up lyrics about the toast and eggs she was scrambling and the tale she gave a melody continued all the way to her stacking the food together before wrapping her dad's into tin foil.</p><p>She absently noted the sound of a rather large sounding engine idling outside, but she assumed it was a passerby since Edward had claimed he'd be pulling double duty for the week.</p><p>"Y'know," Charlie sounded practically exhausted as his boots hit the landing, Bella turned to him and found that once again his eyes were turned outside to the curb,</p><p>"I don't actually recognize that thing."</p><p>Bella peeked out the kitchen window only to find a fire engine red hulking SUV idling on their curb like it belonged there. She frowned and was about to deny knowing it either until the passenger door opened and Rosalie Hale stepped out looking like a billion dollars.</p><p>"Um...." was all Bella could say as she watch the blonde begin making her way up the drive with the elegance only models seemed to possess.</p><p>Realizing what was about to occur, Bella shook off the shock from her addled brain before rushing to the door in order to unlock it .</p><p>"So they're driving you to school now?" Charlie was clearly confused as he watched his daughter grab his foil wrapped breakfast as well as her own sandwich.</p><p>"Apparently," Bella choked out a bit confused about the fact that Rosalie was the one about to come through the door.</p><p>"They're not even in school anymore," the man replied and it was clear that this didn't fit with his own rationalizations for not complaining about the Cullens driving her practically everyday.</p><p>Before Bella could reply Rosalie pulled the door opened as if she was Alice and did this all the time, before in the kindest tone Bella had ever heard from the Vampire girl,</p><p>"Morning Chief Swan."</p><p>Charlie looked at the girl like he was seeing an apparition, likely because Rosalie was not a Cullen he associated with Bella,</p><p>"Morning."</p><p>Bella grabbed her bag and Rosalie stood there expectantly and the very Human girl felt like she'd fallen into the twilight zone.</p><p>"Good Morning Rosalie," Bella tried her best to sound like she expected the other girl but it obviously came out a bit odd,</p><p>"Is it alright to eat in that? It's looks like it's worth more than me."</p><p>"I doubt it," Rosalie responded instantly as if she was stating a truth of the universe, "What are eggs to carpet shampoo?"</p><p>Bella took that as a strange allowance and said her goodbyes to a still confused Charlie as she followed Rosalie towards the huge monster of a vehicle. Drawing closer Bella realized that this was a HUMMER 2.</p><p>Suddenly she wasn't sure she could eat at all, let alone do it in the SUV.</p><p>Rosalie surprised her again as the Vampire girl opened the back door and offered, "If you need help getting in and out just ask.</p><p>"I don't want you tearing your stitches."</p><p>Bella swallowed and switched her sandwich to her left hand before reaching up to the handle and gauging the height of the SUV,</p><p>"I think I have it, thanks."</p><p>Rosalie just stood there, watching.</p><p>So, mustering all her courage Bella hauled herself into the behemoth of a vehicle and once she had, Rosalie shut the door before easily hopping into the passenger side. Peripherally, Bella noted that Charlie was getting into his cruiser just as Emmett knocked her out of her rather odd state by saying,</p><p>"Welcome to Cullen Transportation Services, where would you like to go today?"</p><p>"Good morning Emmett," Bella smiled at the boy who just smiled back widely showing off his dimples. He appeared far more enthusiastic than his Mate over the circumstances as Rosalie seemed determined to stare out the window.</p><p>"Seattle? Port Angeles?" Emmett continued with the joke and Bella finally huffed out a laugh.</p><p>"School Emmett, some of haven't gotten their high school diploma."</p><p>"Sounds boring," the curly haired Vampire teased as he finally pulled away from the curb. Bella couldn't help but feel like she was in some sort of monster truck.</p><p>The thing was huge and still had a new car smell which made her wonder if they'd decided on this instead of the Jeep because it was something shiny and exciting.</p><p>"Yeah I'll live though," Bella said right back and was surprised that Rosalie's silence wasn't as heavy as she'd expected it to be. It was just there.</p><p>"Be glad you only have to do it once," he informed her as sagely as he could and Bella wondered at that.</p><p>"You don't actually go to high school every time you move right? Because that would be awful."</p><p>"Nah!" He seemed eager to please as he explained, "Sometimes we live in Mated Pairs within our territory or go to college but use Carlisle's house as our 'Home' for the holidays and weekends.</p><p>"Forks is just really perfect so we all started young to stay longer."</p><p>"Good," Bella was happy to hear that, she didn't think she could watch merrily as they all repeat the same song and dance every 4-5 years,</p><p>"I hate to think of you all having spent your lives bored to death."</p><p>"Rose and I are lucky, we're older looking so we can play newly weds as often as we want," He turned to share a smile with his Mate and the girl returned it fully as if Bella wasn't even there,</p><p>"You're even luckier though. You get to age out completely and do whatever you want after you change."</p><p>"Bella could do whatever she wants regardless of whether or not she changes," Rosalie broke her silence with an irritated tone and Emmett was happy to soothe her,</p><p>"Babe, you know I'm just excited to get rid of those creeps and get out of here."</p><p>Ostensibly he was talking about Victoria and Laurent and Bella could see his point. Their apparent desire for revenge did present an issue when it came to their ability to leave and Bella changing would make it a lot simpler.</p><p>Rosalie made a sound that Bella couldn't interpret but it was apparently enough for Emmett to continued driving on with a smile as his Mate popped a mix CD into the player to fill the silence for the duration of the ride.</p><p>Pulling up to the school was a whole other story though.</p><p>For the first time in ages, people were staring at the sparkling new HUMMER 2 that had pulled into the drop off zone. Bella could see not only Jessica and Mike openly gaping from their place talking on the lawn but Tyler had his arm around Lauren as he and another boy began shoving each other excitedly at the sight of the SUV.</p><p>Swallowing hard, Bella was about to push the door opened when Rosalie declared, "Don't, I've got it."</p><p>"As fun as it would be to rush you the the ER right now and see Carlisle flounder, we don't need you falling on your face from such a high drop," Emmett teased lightly and Bella was glad that someone thought her inability to stay upright for long durations was humorous.</p><p>Rosalie quickly swung opened her door before hopping out and pulling Bella's own side opened. The Vampire girl then put out a hand.</p><p>For a moment it felt like the world had shifted completely as Rosalie's face held no strange emotions, only a simple expression of neutrality as Bella placed her palm into the proffered hand.</p><p>Like the other Cullens, Rosalie's hand was cold yet smooth, but somehow delicate in a way not even Alice's had been. The support was enough for Bella to get out of the vehicle safely and she was surprised when Rosalie offered a tight smile.</p><p>"Thanks," Bella offered, returning the expression lightly, feeling like something had begun to shift like the loose stones on the sides of a path over a cliff which could tumble only to bring about an avalanche.</p><p>The other girl just nodded before shutting the backseat and climbing right back into the red SUV.</p><p>Emmett wasted no time, once Bella was clearly on the sidewalk he drove away.</p><p>Fortunately for her, Edward had been leaning against the small brick wall that lined the elevated lawn. So the boy strode over to her without any fuss, which prevented any looky loos from descending with their many questions.</p><p>"I would ask how the ride was but there's something more important happening," Edward's tone was grave which had Bella's heart quickening as he gave a slight look around before lowering his volume,</p><p>"Angela's in the girl's room off the cafeteria crying and you should probably get in there."</p><p>Before he'd even finished his sentence Bella's legs were moving.</p><p>She knew.</p><p>Oh, Bella knew the many things that could cause a girl as sweet and kind as Angela to cry. Something inside of her was suddenly thirsty for blood as she cut her way through the curious glances and whispers while Edward followed hot on her heels.</p><p>Edward could be applied to for the whys and whens but Bella couldn't help but think that it would be best to allow Angela herself to grant those things to her. Bella was a girl who had her own secrets and knew that if a telepath went blabbing them, even if they meant well, she would be livid.</p><p>So she pushed aside whatever had just occurred between herself and Rosalie as she made her way into the cafeteria, then over to the bathrooms. Edward was happy to stop at the door and he gave Bella a look which she somehow knew meant that he wouldn't let anyone interrupt them.</p><p>Without saying anything, Bella pushed her way into the girls room and the moment the door was opened, Angela's quiet sobs filled her ears.</p><p>The door swung shut haphazardly and Bella crept close to the stall which she could hear the crying originating from. Gently, ever so gently she called out,</p><p>"Angela, it's Bella. Do you need me to call someone for you?"</p><p>Surprisingly the bathroom stall opened revealing Angela, her eyes red while tears stained her round cheeks. Splotches of angry crimson covered her face while the girl's glasses were messily pushed onto the top of her head.</p><p>There was snot, and Bella wondered how long she'd been crying.</p><p>"Bella? How'd you know I was here?"</p><p>"Edward said he saw you run in," she answered easily, it was getting so much easier to lie. But Bella ignored that and carried on trying to help,</p><p>"Do you need anything? I'd offer to listen but I don't want you to talk unless you want to."</p><p>Angela huffed out a bitter laugh that brought more tears and Bella wished she was better at this.</p><p>"Eric broke up with me."</p><p>The reveal was startling.</p><p>On some level Bella knew that Angela and Eric had continued dating after prom, it was just a thing. Like how Mike was still seeing Jessica, and everyone obnoxiously wondered when her and Edward would be <em>official</em>.</p><p>It was just a fact she had in her mind regarding life at school.</p><p>"Oh Angela that's awful!"</p><p>Angela snorted and it was so ugly that Bella couldn't help but think it didn't belong as the other girl sobbed and corrected,</p><p>"Technically I broke up with him."</p><p>Bella took a breath and closed her eyes as she leaned against the divider between the stalls so that she could look at Angela better through the slightly opened door. She sincerely hoped that Eric hadn't cheated on her, but it was the only thing coming to mind as Bella tried to carefully ask,</p><p>"What could possibly have happened? You guys looked really happy together."</p><p>Taking a deep breath Angela used a napkin that looked like it came from the cafeteria to wipe her eyes as she began very meticulously,</p><p>"Mike told Jessica that you told him that there was no chance of being friends anymore, so she demanded that everyone stop talking to you.</p><p>"I told her that you were still my friend and it would be unfair since you didn't  mind me talking to her. That was when Eric took her side and said that he had to because Mike is his best friend and that we couldn't be together if I was going to be hanging out with you."</p><p>"That's bullshit," Bella cursed and it wasn't normal for her to say that sort of thing but the amount of red she was seeing practically blinded her.</p><p>It was so stupid! By that logic, Mike should have dropped Jessica for being the one causing all the drama! Why was Angela the one getting shafted?!</p><p>"I know," Angela sighed before hiccuping, her shoulders began to shake as she tried to push forwards, Bella couldn't help but be amazed at the other girl's strength,</p><p>"I told them it wasn't fair because you didn't mind that I was still hanging out with Jessica and that it wasn't right to be giving me ultimatums because his friend's girlfriend couldn't just let go of the fact you had one bad day."</p><p>Bella could see it then.</p><p>What happened.</p><p>Her theory was confirmed as Angela's crying started back up, "So I told him I couldn't be with someone who would choose his friend's girlfriend over me and that we should just be neutral because it was between you and Jessica."</p><p>Closing her eyes in horror Bella took a deep breath as Angela finally finished, "He said he wan't gonna change his mind because it was about Mike not Jessica so I did it.</p><p>"I told him we were through and-"</p><p>She started sobbing in earnest again so Bella finally opened the stall fully, then in a quick decision wrapped her arms around Angela who gasped.</p><p>"Bella?"</p><p>"It's alright," Bella whispered as she began to lightly stroke Angela's shoulder, the other girl then completely turned herself into her and began sobbing in earnest.</p><p>"You're right, it wasn't fair. Eric shouldn't have put you in that kind of situation, it was cruel of him."</p><p>They sat there as Angela cried, clutching Bella's hoodie like a lifeline until the first bell rang and then the second. Still she sobbed while Bella stroked her hair like Angela was a child, doing her best to provide as much comfort as she could manage to a girl she was still just getting to know.</p><p>It was a bold decision, as Bella called out, "Edward, pull the car out front."</p><p>Angela calmed her sobs before pulling away slightly, "Edward isn't in here."</p><p>"Doesn't matter," Bella took a napkin from Angela's hand and helped wipe her face, "The three of us aren't going to school today."</p><p>"What?!" Angela's crying had calmed a lot, she'd likely begun to run out of tears, but her expression was now confused,</p><p>"We can't just ditch school!"</p><p>Suddenly, Bella grew determined that they would. Because she was 18 and Charlie wouldn't get a call if she just left. As for Carlisle, he'd trust she knew what she was doing pulling Edward out of school for the day.</p><p>He'd probably think it was cute.</p><p>"Yeah we can," Bella smiled softly, then added, just to be safe because Angela was still 17 until December, "Unless you think your parents will find out and get angry."</p><p>Angela shook her head lightly, something was starting to shine in her eyes, to Bella it looked a lot like hope, "They won't get a call. I've never missed a day."</p><p>"Then let's get out of here," Bella offered a hand up which Angela took tentatively, still unsure about the course she was being offered no doubt,</p><p>"Where are we going?"</p><p>"We'll figure it out in the car," she replied easily as she guided Angela out of the stall, "First let's wash your face alright?"</p><p>Nodding Angela released Bella's hand and began cleaning her self up, there was still a heaviness to her and Bella doubted it would be the last time the girl cried, but it was good to have her willing to leave the bathroom stall.</p><p>She watched as Angela scrubbed the tear streaks and rubbed her eyes with cool water until they were no longer so angry and her face was beginning to even out in tone again. Last he pulled her glasses back down to their perch on her tiny nose.</p><p>Bella immediately took her hand and began leading her out of the Cafeteria and out to the front of the school. There weren't many teachers out, and being seniors they had the right to come and go as they please most of the time.</p><p>As requested, Edward had pulled his Volvo to the pick up area while Angela had been cleaning up.</p><p>"You get in the front," Bella smiled kindly, not wanting Angela to get lost in the backseat. The other girl looked at her like she'd gone insane to be sticking her next to <em>Edward Cullen</em>, but Bella ignored it as she slid herself into the back.</p><p>Having no other choice, Angela did as she was told right before Edward practically gunned it by human standards which caused the girl next to him to yelp.</p><p>"Edward be nice," Bella chuckled a bit as she leaned forwards to pat Angela's arm in assurance,</p><p>"He's a speed demon but he's fine."</p><p>"Where are we headed?" Edward asked, and Bella should have figured he'd ask but hadn't thought beyond moving Angela out of school away from prying eyes,</p><p>"Well, somewhere Charlie won't figure out I decided to ditch with you."</p><p>"So home, since Emmett and Rosalie are headed up to Port Angeles to shop for luggage."</p><p>"Home it is," Bella agreed and wondered what her life was becoming as she pulled out her phone before thinking better of it and asking,</p><p>"Should we call Dr. Cullen?"</p><p>Edward pulled a face, and Bella wondered at it until she realized it was probably because she was referring to his father so formally, which was kind of adorable.</p><p>"You know he has a morning shift," Edward replied a bit cautiously as he spared a glance to the girl in his passenger seat. Angela looked like it was slowly beginning to dawn on her that she was about to see the Cullen's legendary house at the end of the old forest road.</p><p> </p><p>Jessica Stanley, eat your heart out.</p><p> </p><p>"But if he comes home for <em>lunch</em> then what is he going to say if Angela's still there?" Bella pressed trying to cover all her bases. She didn't want anyone to be made uncomfortable by her scent on top of Angela's own.</p><p>Edward, fortunately picked up what she was putting down, "Yeah alright you call him, I guess."</p><p>Angela looked back at Bella in surprised which made Bella want to brain Edward with her phone. Then again, she should have been expecting that, because Edward was driving and pretending to be Human so it wouldn't be good for him to call while on the road.</p><p>Bella hoped that she could pull this off as she hit Carlisle's number on her phone under 'Dr. Cullen', which she'd labelled it as just in case anyone saw his ID.</p><p>It rang twice before his voice filled the speaker, quickly it became apparent he was concerned, "Isabella is everything alright? Why aren't you in school?"</p><p>"Hi Dr. Cullen. I hope I'm not bothering you but I'm calling cause Edward is driving," Bella forced out in the most blase tone she could muster at the sound of his worry,</p><p>"Angela Webber just broke up with her boyfriend and she's in no condition to be going to class so, Edward and I were hoping to bring her around to the house. Is that alright?"</p><p>Silence reigned for a moment and Bella thought Edward was about to burst out laughing with the way his eyes were gleaming while he pressed his lips together. If he were Human he'd be turning red from holding in his mirth.</p><p>Then, in the most professional tone he'd ever taken with her, even more clinical than even the first time they met, Carlisle replied, "Of course. Tell Edward he's free to use my card to order in if he wants.</p><p>"I'm sure the two of you will be responsible with it."</p><p>"Thanks Dr. Cullen," Bella said the words and it was alien to just end the call with, "Sorry for the sudden call."</p><p>"It's not a problem," he affirmed still sounding stilted and Bella wished she could give her I love yous but forced herself to just give out a quick,</p><p>"Bye."</p><p>Then hung up.</p><p>Edward fortunately didn't start busting a gut, because Bella would have had to shove him out of the car if he had. She knew though that Angela could definitely feel the weird atmosphere that had built in the car.</p><p>"He says it's fine and we can use his card for food," Bella informed them because Angela didn't hear it even if Edward's Vampiric senses had allowed him to.</p><p>"Cool," Edward was clearly trying to keep himself together as Bella looked to Angela,</p><p>"What's your favorite kind of ice cream?"</p><p>"Uh, strawberry?" Angela was clearly lost and it probably didn't help that they were clearly dancing around the phone call.</p><p>"We have strawberry at home," Edward replied like the good son Bella knew he could be.</p><p>"Alright, so we'll go to the house order pizza and spend the day watching stupid movies. How does that sound?"</p><p>Angela took a deep breath and looked about ready to cry all over again, "Yeah it sounds really really good."</p><p>"Perfect," Bella smiled.</p><p>Edward did too.</p><p> </p><hr/><p> </p><p>"He just always seemed perfect all the time," Angela sighed as she put a spoonful of Talenti strawberry gelato into her mouth.</p><p>They'd eaten half a pizza together while Edward just sat there making his disappear in an act of Magic Bella wasn't going to question.</p><p>"Nobody's perfect," Edward informed her which was said surprisingly with a level of kindness Bella didn't think was possible for anyone to say such a thing with.</p><p>"Dr. Cullen probably is," Angela said dreamily while the male lead on the TV shot up an entire truck full of black vested villains. Because apparently Angela's idea of a stupid movie was a blockbuster action hero movie which, to be fair, made sense.</p><p>"Yeah, no," Bella snorted as she took a bit of her chocolate gelato and tried not to think about how much it had cost because the label was so fancy it was terrifying.</p><p>She realized too late what she'd said as no one replied to her. Slowly turned to Angela who was looking at Bella thoughtfully while Edward was staring at her like she was an idiot.</p><p>It was time to back track and talk trash about her boyfriend, apparently. Bella wasn't ready for that at all. Because while it was true that he wasn't perfect, Carlisle was the kind of guy who proved romance wasn't actually dead and gone.</p><p>"I mean," she began as she swallowed her bite of gelato, as she dug into her brain for any points of contention that didn't involve Vampires, "Edward's right, nobody's perfect, and I've spent enough time with the Cullens to know Dr. Cullen is no exception to that rule.</p><p>"Like, for example, his favorite Jane Austen novel is Mansfield Park!" Bella said the words and realized how crazy she sounded but didn't care as she trudged on,</p><p>"The guy's got something against Jane Eyre and honestly thinks Fahrenheit 451 is Bradbury's finest work , and while it's good, Dandelion Wine is right there!"</p><p>Angela was looking at Bella as if she might as well been speaking Swedish while Edward was beginning to crack up at her rant.</p><p>"As you can see, Bella only sees my father as a glorified librarian," the boy chuckled and Angela actually smiled a bit at the so called revelation.</p><p>"Sometimes a man's only good for his books," Bella replied as she leaned back into the couch glad that Angela was once more watching her movie and eating her ice cream while trying to remember that Eric wasn't worth her time or tears.</p><p>She'd have to apologize to Carlisle for that final remark later.</p><p>As the movie continued to it's logical conclusion of the rogue agent getting free and kissing the chick that has been assisting him, Bella was surprised to find her phone start ringing.</p><p>So as Angela and Edward began debating over what to put on next, Bella found herself her cellphone out of her pocket, she looked at the ID and smiled as she flipped the device opened before standing and making her way just out of the living room so as not to bother the others as they chose their next flick.</p><p>Pressing the phone to her ear, Bella could see Angela putting some DVD into the player as she herself greeted, "City Morgue."</p><p>"Oh, this must be the wrong number," Jacob replied playing a long, "I thought this was Dave's BBQ"</p><p>"That's next door" Bella chuckled as her friend made a rather convincing retching noise,</p><p>"That's disgusting Bella."</p><p>"What do you want? I'm having a movie day with Angela," She smiled as she said the words, still happy to be hearing from Jacob despite the circumstances.</p><p>"Well I won't keep you too long, just wanted to ask you to the theaters on Sunday. Leah Clearwater should be coming, she's..."</p><p>"Going through a bad break up...," Bella recalled easily. Jacob had been trying to get the girl to come out with them but Leah had been stubbornly refusing calling Jake annoying. Apparently he'd worn her down though.</p><p>Bella didn't know if that was a good or bad thing, it just depended she supposed how the boy had gone about it,</p><p>"You think Angela could come too? I told her I'd send her an invite the next time we went out and she's going through a rough patch too."</p><p>"Yeah sure," Jacob replied nonchalantly, "I mean, I know this is your unholy plan to form a league of female assassins but as long as I can be your Charlie we'll be fine."</p><p>"You're planning on paying then?" Bella teased him but the boy just laughed.</p><p>"No way, your the one with a job," he responded with equal lightness and Bella shook her head a bit at him. Honestly, one day he's complaining about her always being busy and the next he's telling her that she has to fund everything because <em>she</em> has a job.</p><p>There was no pleasing him.</p><p>Still though she was smiling, "Well since I'm paying I guess I can at least let you choose the movie and show time."</p><p>"Of course, we can't let you do all the work," Jacob replied with all the put on helpfulness that he probably could manage,</p><p>"Leah says she'll watch anything with explosions and I think Bleak Streets is the only thing likely to fit the bill."</p><p>"Sounds good," now that she knew Angela didn't mind action thrillers it was a great middle ground,</p><p>"What times is it showing?"</p><p>"If you guys want to get something to eat first then we can go at like 7," Jacob sounded like he was looking at the showtimes in the paper as there was a rustling noise,</p><p>"Or 8, anything after that will be too late for Billy to be letting me out."</p><p>"Oh is your bedtime still 9?" Bella asked sweetly which had him groaning petulantly.</p><p>"Not all of us are senior citizens allowed to creep around until dawn," Jacob returned but there was no heat.</p><p>"So that you don't get turned into a pumpkin, we'll catch Bleak Streets at 7," she decided right then, "Anyone else coming or should it just be the four of us?"</p><p>"You're not going to invite that weirdo right?" Jacob whispered and Bella could see Edward begin to smile slightly from his place on the couch as he gave her a slight glance which meant that he could still hear the other boy on the phone.</p><p>"No, Edward turns to pumpkin at 7 so he won't be coming," was her facetious reply and Jacob dropped it at that.</p><p>"You have any idea when we'll be able to go out shopping for junkers?" Jacob asked suddenly and Bella hadn't thought about it, but he was right. Her time at Newtons was almost over so they'd need to go junking soon.</p><p>"How's the 15th of next month sound? I'll be done with work and we can make a whole day out of it. Maybe bring Leah along if it all goes well," Bella supplied and he seemed to mull it over a bit on his side before finally responding.</p><p>"Yeah alright," he sounded thoughtful as if he was really going through his head, which was likely since Jacob was the one who tended to take Billy to his Doctor's appointments and other important events,</p><p>"That actually sounds good."</p><p>"Well, I hate to cut this short but I've left Angela alone with Edward too long and they barely know each other so I should get back," Bella informed him briskly which had Jacob making a bit of a disappointed noise but he ultimately let her go.</p><p>After saying her goodbyes and sliding her phone back into her pocket, Bella slumped back onto the couch, "How's Sunday sound for going to the movies?</p><p>"Jake just called to invite me and whoever I wanted.We're gonna watch Bleak Streets at 7, maybe get something to eat first."</p><p>"I'm not going," Edward very kindly rejected, "I apparently turn into a pumpkin at 7."</p><p>Angela gave him an odd look but seemed to brush off the comment, "That sounds kind of fun.... Yeah, alright. I did say I'd go next time you did something like that."</p><p>"If you cancel I won't mind," Bella smiled brightly, assuring the girl, after all there was no telling how Angela would feel.</p><p>"I'm sure it'll be fine," Angela replied confidently and Bella hoped it would be.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>RIP to Charlie. Cause of Death: the endless parade of Cars the Cullens seem to be having in front of his house</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0007"><h2>7. Chapter 7</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>This is short but it's exactly what I want it to be</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>She was in her night clothes as she brushed her hair when the tell tale click of her window locking shut reached her ears. It was a noise Bella knew that Carlisle only made so that she was aware of his arrival. The smile that spread across her face couldn't be repressed as she turned around to find the man in question lounging on her bad as if he'd been there for ages.</p><p>"I feel like I should apologize for calling you like that earlier," Bella chuckled a bit and she knew she should't be laughing but the sparkle in Carlisle's honey colored eyes paired with the light tugging at the corner of his lips told her that he too found the situation humorous.</p><p>"Forgive me but I have no memory of you calling me, Isabella," Carlisle's tone was light and teasing in a way that made Bella have to hold back the laugh threatening to bubble it's way out of her chest while he overly pleasantly informed her,</p><p>"I do remember Edward's friend from school calling me, but not my Mate. After all, my precious Isabella hardly needs my permission for anything and would never address me so coldly."</p><p>There was a light clacking noise as Bell placed her brush on to her dresser, then taking a moment to shut off her room light leaving only the glow of her lamp, she made her way over to the man on her bed.</p><p>In an act of boldness, which she seemed to have in spades that day, she tossed a leg over him. Climbing onto her Mate so that she was straddling his hips in a way that made Carlisle inhale sharply but he didn't attempt to change positions or remove her. Instead his icy hands gently gripped her hips and Bella could feel the band of her night shorts shift while her loose shirt happily fell over the tips of his fingers.</p><p>"Well Dr. Cullen," Bella pressed her forehead to his, a she did so she found him practically still as the grave, eyes shining with lips slightly parted, all while she grinned down at him spreading her hands on his chest,</p><p>"I'm sure Edward's friend appreciated your generosity, and won't be calling again for a very long time."</p><p>"Don't address me like that with those eyes," Carlisle sounded like he was begging quietly for mercy as he swallowed hard,</p><p>"I find my control lacking enough when I'm with you."</p><p>Startling, that's what it was. To find herself having so much power over this kind man who was so beautiful and generous that there was no doubt in Bella's mind that he could have anyone he pleased. Somehow though, a quirk of Survival and Biology had led him to her.</p><p>And not only had it pointed him in her direction, but Carlisle walked that path with open arms, choosing to pursue it when he could have walked away.</p><p>He chose her and Bella was happy to pick him right back once she was given the chance.</p><p>It was enough to have her tilting her head ever so slightly before pressing her lips to his, an action Carlisle welcomed as his broad hands ran up her back, fingers playing delicately against Bella's spine still covered in a cotton shirt as she herself clutched at the fabric which covered his stomach.</p><p>Pulling away just slightly Bella sighed, realizing that if they continued she would be breaching his boundaries, "We should talk about something else."</p><p>It was really the best course of action, all things considered.</p><p>"Perhaps my copy of The Scarlet Pimpernel which you have either stolen or sold off because I have not seen it in ages," Carlisle offered lightly which caused Bella to snort indelicately as she ducked her head before sliding herself down his body. Tucking herself against him so that his chin was atop her hair and she was completely blanketed over him.</p><p>"Would you believe me if I said I hadn't finished it?" Bella pressed her smile into him as Carlisle's reply caused his chest to vibrate,</p><p>"I would, though I find it difficult to believe since you very easily could have finished it while you were recovering before your date to prom."</p><p>"Have I had it that long?" as she asked the question, Bella realized she had in fact been in possession of it since their initial discussion of Petrarch. It felt like that was almost lifetimes ago an not separated from her by simply a few summer months,</p><p>"How negligent of me."</p><p>Carlisle began very gently stroking his hands up and down her thighs without any real intention. Bella basked in the feel of him as it caused something below her stomach to start tightening without her permission as a fire began to kindle inside of her.</p><p>"If you find it boring you don't need to finish it," he offered and Bella knew that Carlisle's words were completely sincere. They didn't always agree on books but it was fun to debate them anyways,</p><p>"Nah, I'll try to get through it so I can tell you exactly which part made me started liking it, or where I decided it was a complete waste of time."</p><p>That did get a light chuckle out of him and in that moment Bella hoped it would always be this easy as she found the coolness of his skin seeping into her and lulling her to sleep as he continued to comfortingly stroke her bare legs. Was this cheating? For it this to come so easy? Bella had always been told of nervous blushing and being unable to look a boyfriend in the eye, but while she did get shy and shrink back it was never when they were like this. Being alone together was the simplest thing in the world. Perhaps it was being around others which was difficult, because part of her felt that loving him was almost too sacred to share. Or even the fact that she was afraid that it wouldn't be understood?  Whatever it was, the fact that she could lay over him and feel his hands on her and not risk her heart exploding made Bella think she might have it a bit too easy.</p><p>This was another thing she'd take selfishly. Probably not anywhere near deserving of it, Bella was going to grab the tranquility with both hands and run with it. Later nerves could have a place, when they had clear plans to make love she could blush and squirm, but she wasn't going to let the future effect this moment.</p><p>"Will you be here when I wake up again?" She whispered, softly, afraid that if she spoke louder she'd be pulled out from her drowsy state.</p><p>"Likely not," Carlisle replied and there was regret in his tone which Bella took into her heart.</p><p>"That's alright," Bella whispered as sleep's hands pushed her out to sea, all while Carlisle kept her afloat as she drifted towards the endless horizons that her dreams would span even beyond the skyline.</p><p> </p><p>When morning did come, he was indeed gone, but Carlisle's departure wasn't what rustled her from sleep.</p><p>No.</p><p>It was the ringing of her cell phone on the nightstand as someone called far earlier than Bella normally woke on a Saturday.</p><p>She groaned then proceeded to rolled over towards the noise in case it was important, and she reached out, grasping practically absently for the device all the while it blared out it's incessant tones. Finally as Bella was able to grab it before unceremoniously yanking the charging cord from the port, she looked at the ID and felt all her upset fade away into eagerness.</p><p>Flipping the phone open, Bella paused as a small slip of paper fluttered out of it. Grabbing the paper to investigate later, she flopped backwards onto her messy sheets, sleepily sighing out as a weight she hadn't been fully aware of lifted, "You have no idea how good it is to hear from you."</p><p>"I miss you too," Alice's bright tone chimed like a birdsong that Bella hadn't been blessed with in an age, even though, in actuality only a few very long weeks had passed.</p><p>"Happy October."</p><p>"You did not call to remind me that it's October," Bella smiled at the other girl's odd way. People liked to think Alice was weird, but they were Human weren't they? How could they even begin to see the precious wonder of the girl who could see free will in action?</p><p>"But, I'll accept if you tell me how you and Jasper are holding up."</p><p>"Jazz is..." Alice trailed off a bit and Bella knew the girl was probably trying to decide whether or not the information should be shared,</p><p>"He's doing better. I think he misses his brothers the most."</p><p>"And you?" Bella asked because she had inquired after both of them for a reason. There was no way that Alice hadn't felt as bad as her Mate did for leaving,</p><p>"Are you holding up fine?"</p><p>"As fine as I can be," was the placating reply and Bella wondered what the girl was holding back. Whatever it was, Alice only tended to grin and bear it for important reasons,</p><p>"I'm starting to think we might not make Ice Skating. Carlisle keeps going back and forth on the date and you honestly have to tell him to just pick one."</p><p>Bella let out a laugh at the realization that, of course Alice saw that they were going Ice Skating. Hadn't Carlisle said he'd make it happen?</p><p>"Don't laugh Bella!" Alice was clearly pouting at the fact that she was going to miss such an outing,</p><p>"It looks like it's gonna be so much fun! Be sure to invite Angela because Charlie might not let you go if I'm not back yet."</p><p>Bella took that to mean that Ice Skating was going to happen before they set the record straight with Charlie. Which meant that they had a bit of time to discuss it further,</p><p>"Alright, do you have a time frame? Because this is going to sound crazy, but I need you since I have no idea how to do this 'Break up Therapy' thing beyond the pizza and ice cream stage."</p><p>"You can take her for a little retail therapy Bella , it's not that hard," Alice laughed as if it wasn't the most ridiculous thing she'd ever said in her life,</p><p>"It's just matching colors and not getting anything too ostentatious or kitschy."</p><p>"You're forgetting something very important," Bella was still smiling as she very succinctly informed her sort of daughter,</p><p>"I have no taste at all."</p><p>Technically she was being honest, but Bella was also avoiding the fact that in order to take Angela shopping she'd need money. And while most of her funds were for the Junkers, Bella had a little bit left over for other things, but even if they went to an outlet store the trip would likely deplete her funds.</p><p>She wasn't about to go to Carlisle and ask for money either.</p><p>That would be practically tasteless. Bella knew he'd be happy to hand over his card and let her buy the moon if she wanted, but the idea of it kind of turned her stomach.</p><p>Gifts were bad enough.</p><p>Bella couldn't bear Charlie thinking that she was with Carlisle for money.</p><p>That's what everyone was going to think though right? No matter what she did, on some level everyone was going to think she was laying down and thinking of England, praying that Carlisle would toss a few thousand dollars her way.</p><p>A place deep inside her chest rumbled and even taking a deep breath wouldn't calm it as Bella tried to remind herself that she'd already considered this and decided it was worth the rumors to be with the Cullens. To get everything she ever wanted.</p><p>It barely helped.</p><p>"Bella , you're starting to scare me a little. Tell me if you're alright," Alice's voice was soothing as could be and the words were enough to bring Bella back down to Earth. It was nice to know Alice had her back.</p><p>"It's passed, I'm not fine but I will be," Bella heaved a great breath and it was finally working to calm her again, "I just don't think I can take Angela shopping."</p><p>The tiny Vampire informed her very brightly then, "Well, unless something changes, Jasper and I aren't coming back until after Halloween but before Veterans day. So I recommend asking Rosalie for help if you decide to do the shopping thing."</p><p>Bella frowned and felt the loss all over as the knowledge that she'd have to wait a whole month to see Alice and Jasper again. She knew that Jasper needed the time to come to terms with everything that had happened but Bella just wished she could be there for them in person instead simply in spirit.</p><p>Then the thought of asking Rosalie for anything was horrifying. Rosalie was the only member of the family Bella hadn't exchanged more than two or three sentences with. Bella had started growing comfortable thinking of the other's as her potential children.</p><p>But Rosalie?</p><p>The blonde was three planets and the entirety of Antarctica away from being close to Bella even thinking of her as more than Emmett's Mate.</p><p>"Yeah I think shopping's a no go," Bella replied a bit sad to let Alice's suggestion down because of her own discomfort. the prescient girl was always so earnest and genuinely kind that Bella couldn't help but feel a bit of pain at disappointing the tiny girl,</p><p>"Maybe we can have sleep over."</p><p>"Oh Bella!" Alice suddenly cried out with such cheer that it was practically deafening, "Yes! If you want, you can go to my room and raid my closet for a few things! Get some fancy pajamas or some of the unopened make up sets!</p><p>"You have my total permission to take whatever you want so long as it's not a crest or Jasper's!"</p><p>Bella felt more than a bit less weird about that suggestion so after a moment of consideration she agreed, "OK, if it helps Angela I'll do it."</p><p>"I'm so excited and I'm not even gonna be there!" Alice sighed dreamily and Bella pressed her lips together trying not to laugh at the other girl's excitement.</p><p>"Well i'm sure you'll make up for it when you get back," the Human girl assured her lightly.</p><p>Alice's reply was coated in a promise of mischief, "Oh you bet I will! If you think I'm missing the chance to take you shopping then you have another thing coming!"</p><p>Finally sitting up Bella shifted so that her legs were folded together. It was nice to hear Alice genuinely excited to come back, she only wished that Jasper was equally enthused but, while Bella had his number, she didn't want to push him too much.</p><p>"Trust me, I'm bracing myself for that as best as I can," Bella teased lightly but the other girl was completely unbothered as Alice grew silent for a moment.</p><p>Whatever it was, a Vision or another conversation happening in the house, when Alice returned she was apologetic, "Carmen and I are going out hunting with Irina. So I have to go, but stay safe and have fun with the new friends you're making!"</p><p>"Alright, go get something to drink," Bella replied as nicely as she could manage, as she didn't really know how the etiquette around feeding worked but Alice gave a 'will do' so she must not have done so bad.</p><p>Closing her phone, Bella put it aside and unraveled the odd bit of paper that had been stuck inside of the device.</p><p>Biting her lip she couldn't hold back the face splitting smile that overtook her as she read the neat scrawl on what amounted to a tiny bit of scrap paper which read,</p><p>
  <em>"Think of me."</em>
</p><p>And she did.</p><p> </p><hr/><p> </p><p>"Any plans today?" Charlie asked as he sat in his usual morning spot at the dining table as he cut at his very special waffle that Bella had deigned to make that morning.</p><p>As for the girl herself, she was a bit distractedly dipping her toast into the yolk which was pooling next to her potatoes.</p><p>"Not really," Bella replied a bit absently as she tried to focus more on the happiness of the evening spent with Carlisle as well as the good parts of Alice's call. It was difficult not to see it as a hard reminder that she still wasn't quite enough.</p><p>There was a part of her lacking.</p><p>"All my plans are for tomorrow."</p><p>"Oh? You going over to the Cullens again?" Charlie asked so clumsily that Bella had to remind herself that her father was in fact a cop and capable of subtlety. He was just bad when it came to her for some reason.</p><p>"Nah, I'm meeting Jake and Leah at the movies with Angela Webber," Bella felt like she was lying even though it was the complete honest truth.</p><p>"That's good," the man actually appeared happy in a way Bella hadn't seen him for a while. It ached that she wasn't trying harder even though she'd told herself to a thousand times.</p><p>"You going fishing with Harry?" Bella suddenly asked and realized this was it, this was the moment she used that power inside her for Charlie.</p><p>"Yeah," he took a sip of his coffee, none the wiser to what she was about to do to him, "Billy might come too but I'm not sure."</p><p>"Jake or Seth gonna be there?" Bella wondered, and to him it must have seemed idly, but she was using what she always had on him. She never considered it cruel, the thing she did. Because it wasn't about hurting people, it was about cornering them, knowing the course and taking it.</p><p>"Nope, just us two today," Charlie informed her clearly a bit surprised that she was asking for details. Bella had never been an outdoorsy person and the few times she did go fishing with Charlie was when she was little.</p><p>Those were mostly nice memories of Jacob and his sisters playing with her in the water and on the shore.</p><p>So, as she had intended from the start, Bella went in for the kill, "Cool. Hey, next time Seth or Jake go, can I come?"</p><p>Charlie, of course, choked on his coffee.</p><p>"You want to come?" his tone was so incredulous that Bella's heart nearly broke at the sound of it.</p><p>"Yeah, I mean" Bella shrugged and tried to find the words that would let him say yes, "I'm just gonna sit around at the Cullens with Emmett and Edward or sit around at home if I don't.</p><p>"So why not sit around on a boat? Besides, even if Jake doesn't come, I met Seth at the shop and he'll probably be happy to have someone to talk to."</p><p>Charlie was staring at her like he was going to suddenly wake up from a coma and be told that the past 5 years had been a dream.</p><p>"Besides, I've gone hiking with the Cullens, played baseball, and Dr. Cullen said something about ice skating later this month, so why can't I go fishing with you?" Bella reasoned and she could see his heart softening to the idea.</p><p>"Well if you really want to," the words tumbled out of him like he was afraid she'd change her mind last second. Her heart grew a bit then, as if making space for more love.</p><p>"Yeah, I really want to spend time with you," Bella replied and there was not an ounce of fiction in it,</p><p>"I don't want to get in the way of you guys hanging out though so, if Seth or Jake come I won't mind joining."</p><p>Part of her felt like she'd failed him, as Charlie kept casting her hopeful smiles through the rest of the meal and the other part of Bella was glad she'd decided to do it. It wasn't likely Charlie was ever going to be invited out hiking with the Cullens, that was too dangerous, so Bella would have to go to him.</p><p>Hadn't she been going to everyone else?</p><p>For Jacob she'd agreed to learn a bit of mechanics, for the Cullens she'd started playing video games and let them throw her a party. Angela had her raiding Alice's closet for a yet to be planned sleep over while Bella was already planning ways to implement Leah into her schedule.</p><p>Carlisle was the only one who seemed to lack effort to love. Bella didn't need to read the classics to keep up with him, she already had them in her head. Chess had been something she was already interested in and Bella practically felt like it was instinctual to just meld into his mind when they were together.</p><p>So, of course Charlie required effort too.</p><p>"Yeah," Charlie swallowed like he was forcing himself not to get emotional, "I'll tell Harry and I'm sure he won't mind having you around for a day."</p><p>"Great," Bella smiled then, hoping she conveyed just how hopeful she was for this going forwards. Hopefully they could make some memories this way together.</p><p>The rest of breakfast was taken in silence and Bella was glad that Charlie wasn't the kind to buzz with excitement over things as he just finished scooping his eggs and eating them casually, between sips of coffee, until they were all gone.</p><p>She was happy to gather up their dishes and start cleaning them as well as the pots and pans she'd used that morning to make breakfast. By the time she was drying them all, Charlie was finished getting dressed and in the middle of laying out his equipment on the dinning table in order to make sure it was all in place.</p><p>Bella thought it a bit funny that this time, when a vehicle pulled up to their home, it was Charlie being whisked off.</p><p>He said his 'goodbyes' and 'be safes' , which Bella returned happily, before he was out the door riding shotgun in Harry Clearwater's truck.</p><p>The silence that filled the house then was much less warm than that which had come before it. She dried her hands thoroughly and wondered a bit at what to do with herself before she decided that Carlisle was right.</p><p>She had a book she had been unreasonably neglecting, and it wasn't the translated Canzoniere she'd practically ran through a thousand times already.</p><p>As she ambled up the stairs Bella reminded herself that it wasn't that she found the book boring. No, the thing was a piece of literature history she was happy to indulge in and was practically blessed to be loaned an edition of such great value. It was simply the fact that she'd been in the middle of reading it when everything went wild.</p><p>Well, wild-er.</p><p>So it was hard for her to pick it up when she felt like a completely different person. Carlisle would have understood, but Bella didn't really feel it was important.</p><p>Bella wondered if she should just start the whole thing all over again.</p><p>It was a solid idea, and since she had the whole day to herself then it was practically already decided. After all, it had been a while since she spent a whole day just reading a book.</p><p>As reverently as the book demanded, Bella slid it out from the place of honor she kept on her shelf for it right next to her copy of Wuthering Heights that she'd never broken the spine for. Then realizing that this was the perfect chance, she headed out to the front of the house.</p><p>Folding herself up on the porch swing, Bell opened her borrowed book and took a long breath, inhaling the smell of aged ink and paper before she once more began to take in the words written so long ago.</p><p>Taking her time, she turned the pages and reflected on each scene, motive, and possible meaning but still rode the story through.</p><p>Eventually when the cool weather got to be too much, she went inside and continued reading in the living room after procuring herself a throw blanket. Bella even made herself a few cups of tea through it all and the recharge it gave her was almost sinful.</p><p>She practically felt guilty, being so content to spend all that time in solitude when she could have easily ventured over to the Cullens to spend her afternoon with Edward or Emmett. But Bella couldn't regret spending the whole day relaxing and reading, only taking breaks to eat or dress up a new cup of tea.</p><p>The only thing, she felt, would have made the event perfect was having Carlisle there. Not to talk or discuss her book with. As much as she would have loved laying against him as she relaxed, Bella knew that even if he was simply sitting across from her doing his own reading she would have been content.</p><p>Was that normal?</p><p>To want someone's silence like that?</p><p>Bella thought it might be part of love but she wasn't quite sure.</p><p>Perhaps it was just her.</p><p>That would be alright, she mused as she made what had to be her 5th cup of tea. Stirring in a little bit of milk and sugar Bella wondered at what he was doing. Working, likely, saving lives in the ER or doing little check ups. If Jessica Stanley was to be believed he was also fighting off nurses with a stick.</p><p>And funnily enough Bella laughed at the image it invoked.</p><p>By the time Charlie arrived home and Bella was starting dinner, she was more relaxed than she had been in weeks. The combination of taking a whole day to herself with the wonderful nights of sleep having her Mate provided was starting to make her feel more like herself again.</p><p>There were still things to worry about.</p><p>But they could be taken as they came.</p><p>And when Carlisle returned to her that night through her window, Bella could happily say she could return his book.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0008"><h2>8. Chapter 8</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Longest chapter yet </p><p>I didn't want to separate these events because they happen in the same day and I'm already thinking this might just change into a 30 Chapter story after all....</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>It was Sunday morning, the second of October, when Bella found herself once again sitting on Carlisle's desk in his study. The Vampire who owned to room unwrapped her bandage slowly as he spoke in a tone that was far less professional than was probably warranted for their purposes,</p><p>"They may bleed slightly, but that doesn't mean it should hurt. If you feel more than a slight tugging say so."</p><p>Bella couldn't help but be slightly amused at his attempts to go about the whole thing properly. As she had arrived that morning for a family meeting and been reminded her stitches were due out. Since Edward hadn't returned from his hunt the previous evening it was a perfect opportunity to get them done.</p><p>So Carlisle, apparently, was making his best attempts to pretend that she hadn't been woken by his kisses just a couple hours before.</p><p>"You're not going to hurt me Carlisle," Bella assured him lightly as if he was actually worried about such a ridiculous thing, especially when he spent hours upon weeks surrounded by blood and frail human bones which needed setting.</p><p>Removing slightly less than half a dozen sutures wasn't exactly harrowing.</p><p>A cool sensation caressed her skin as his slender finger pressed lightly around her mostly healed wound and Bella had to take a breath against the chill.</p><p>"Yes, but I'd at least like to pretend that treating you is remotely appropriate as I don't intend on allowing anyone else the privilege," he replied sounding a bit shy as the sound of snipping carried over her shoulder informing Bella that he'd begun cutting the tiny wires.</p><p>"So, Dr. Clementine and whatever his name was that got me out of my brace and immobilizer were anomalies?" Bella teased as she felt him begin tugging out the suture with all due gentleness.</p><p>"They were," his breath ghosted across her shoulder and Bella wondered for a moment why before cold lips pressed against her skin that had been exposed by her rolled up short sleeve,</p><p>"I know it sound barbaric, but I don't believe I can tolerate anyone else touching you when you are so vulnerable. Not anymore."</p><p>"That's not reasonable," Bella informed him a bit startled by the words. He'd never been the kind to control her or try an determine what she could and could not do. Unease would have crept into her heart if she didn't know him so well, instead Bella probed a bit deeper,</p><p>"If I get hurt again, I can't just come running to you Carlisle."</p><p>Quick as shot he was in front of her, his eyes were practically oozing affection as the Vampire brought his hand to cup Bella's cheek reverently, with a grin he spoke,</p><p>"I know. It's simply how I feel. Nothing so silly as having you treated by someone else is going to anger me.</p><p>"Consider it the musings of a foolish old man."</p><p>That, made her return the smile before covering his smooth hand with her own, "Alice called yesterday and made demands for you to set the Ice Skating date because it's apparently driving her wild not knowing if she's going to be able to go.</p><p>"So if you know what's good for you it's gotta be after Veterans Day."</p><p>Hand slipping from it's place on her cheek, Carlisle leaned forward, pressed his forehead to her shoulder and laughed. Both of his palms were splayed on the desk as he continued chuckling rather helplessly while his shoulders shook.</p><p>It was a surreal experienced to have him laughing so absolutely unexpectedly and unrestrained. No doubt completely taken by the non sequitur.</p><p>Bella wanted to see it more.</p><p>After a moment Carlisle gathered himself but remained tucked into her like she so constantly did with him. His cool breath puffing out against her neck,</p><p>"I'm glad to hear Alice and Jasper decided to contact someone before our meeting, it's good she called you."</p><p>Overwhelming was the sense of profound love and affection that Bella suddenly felt for Alice. She had somehow assumed that the girl had been in contact with her siblings, perhaps her sister or that Jasper had been having deep conversations with Edward about everything that happened.</p><p>Not once did Bella believe that pair had given everyone else equal radio silence.</p><p>Yet, Alice had called her.</p><p>She hadn't called her father or siblings.</p><p>Bella was hit with the sudden knowledge of what their conversation had contained.</p><p>Tears threatened to fall Bella's face and as she shuddered, Carlisle pulled away slightly to wipe the small bit of moisture away with his thumb. Before he could ask the question that was clear on his face, Bella took a breath,</p><p>"I'm glad too. She sounded better when we were done talking."</p><p>Carlisle gave her a light peck on the lips, "Good. I know you worry about our children and it brings me happiness to know they are willing to come to you."</p><p>"It scares the hell out of me still, but I'm getting used to it," She replied honestly.</p><p>He then got to work fixing her sleeve so that it was no longer exposing what remained to be healed.</p><p>"So I've got the all clear?"</p><p>"Just be careful for another week and you'll be fine," Carlisle once again smiled as he pulled away completely, but not before offering his hand which Bella was more than happy to take into her own.</p><p>Together they made their way down to the living room where it seemed Edward, Emmett, and Rosalie were all sitting on the sofa with a phone on the new coffee table that Bella had been trying to ignore for the fact that it was a nice polished wood in contrast to it's predecessor.</p><p>Carlisle sat himself on the love seat which Bella thought nothing of joining him on, hands still linked.</p><p>"We're all here, so I suppose we can begin," the Cullen Patriarch was in full form as he said the words.</p><p>From the phone came Alice's voice, sounding just as well as it had when Bella had spoken to her the morning before,</p><p>"Great! Then should we start with the Vision or the thing you and Bella were planning?"</p><p>Bella had a feeling that Alice wasn't talking about Ice Skating.</p><p>Carlisle looked to Bella and she realized he was silently asking her what her preference was. So after a short consideration she decided,</p><p>"The Vision is more important, out of the two, it can't be put off for better timing."</p><p>A small ghost of a smile graced Carlisle's features as Alice was happy to inform them of what she'd seen,</p><p>"Well, before the vehicle was always switching between a few of our cars while Bella's truck appeared most often, but now it's stuck between the truck and Chief Swan's police cruiser."</p><p>Carlisle's fingers tightened where they were tangled with Bella's own and proved as effective as a lightening rod for the suddenly shock and fear which rocked her at the thought of Charlie being present for the danger.</p><p>The man who was so like her, yet different, being there to watch his daughter be viciously targeted. Bella felt sick knowing that they'd likely kill him first. Torture her with her own father's death for a thrill.</p><p>Swallowing hard she focused on her hand in Carlisle's and borrowed his strength as Alice continued,</p><p>"The location isn't mixing around as much but I haven't seen one I know well, so I'm assuming it's on the other side of the Treaty line.</p><p>"Which explains why I haven't seen past the initial attack, but there's something else."</p><p>"What more could possible go wrong?!" Edward sounded sick to his stomach and Bella realized that she'd been so focused on the phone containing Alice's voice that she hadn't realized that Edward and Emmett had risen to their feet.</p><p>"It's not Laurent anymore. Somehow the person's gotten blurry like the decisions of who is gonna do it is up in the air."</p><p>"Like they've recruited someone else?" Bella realized suddenly as all eyes were on her. Because if Alice's Vision was shifting between the two options of the Cruiser and her truck then that meant Victoria and Laurent had likely decided to only attack when the Culllens weren't' around.</p><p>If she started going places with Charlie, as she'd recently decided, then it made sense that his cruiser would start showing up.</p><p>So it stood to reason that if Victoria and Laurent were playing eeny-meeny-miny-moe, it would shift between the pair.</p><p>Alice's Vision of the attacker becoming blurry meant they might not want to get their hands dirty and were trying to figure out a way to get someone else to do it.</p><p>"Yeah, actually," Alice agreed sounding relieved that someone apparently understood that her visions were choice based like she was always saying they were. It wasn't that hard to get.</p><p>"The cruiser makes sense," Bella began to explain her reasoning to the Cullens who still seemed a bit surprised at her ability to grasp Alice's gift, "Yesterday I made spur of the moment plans to go fishing with Charlie , we're planning to spend more time together."</p><p>"Who would they get?" Emmett asked incredulously as he crossed his arms, Edward was pacing around like caged animal while Rosalie stared at the phone as intensely trying to comb through her mind for answers.</p><p>"Well, if it's still one person, they'd want to make sure they could take however many of you might show up before the job gets done," Bella blurted out, she wasn't a tactician but....</p><p> </p><p>"Jame's mistake was going in by himself against all your gifts and strength united."</p><p>"Bella's right," Carlisle took a breath and his words were intense, "They won't risk making the same missteps.</p><p>"Not when they stand to lose each other. If they convinced a stranger to help, they wouldn't be risking anything."</p><p>"You think they might Create someone?!" Edward's tone was livid as his eyes grew pitch black as he apparently read his father's mind.</p><p>"A Newborn would be strong enough to take two or three of us if they were properly trained," Carlisle agreed and Bella realized she was missing something.</p><p>"Why? I mean, what makes a new Vampire different from the rest of you?"</p><p>She realized they were all looking at her again as she amended,"I mean besides the uncontrollable Blood Lust, obviously."</p><p>Because if she understood one thing, the Blood Lust was probably going to be the hardest to control.</p><p>To her surprise Emmett snorted and Carlisle impossibly kissed her on the side of her head as he exhaled harshly as if holding back a chuckle while Rosalie stared at her like Bella had revealed a hidden ability to take her own head off and reattach it.</p><p>Edward had a palm covering his eyes and looked either ready to laugh or cry and Bella couldn't say which because he was covering so much of his face.</p><p>Jasper revealed that he was in fact listening in with Alice as his voice came over the speaker, "There's nothing more dangerous than a Newborn Bella."</p><p>Carlisle seemed to hear the reluctance in his son's voice so he continued on,"There is never a time in our Kind's lives when we're at our most uncontrollable, but also our most powerful.</p><p>"For their first 6 months, Human blood and tissue from their own lives still exists inside of them, and that makes Newborns stronger, faster, and much more dangerous."</p><p>"Eventually it fades, but in the past whole armies of only a handful demolished covens to take over territories," Jasper spoke up again and the confidence in his tone betrayed such knowledge that it made Bella shudder at the idea of what destruction could be wrought by such a strike force,</p><p>"Wars were fought in moments. A single day would change the landscape of Power."</p><p>"Newborn armies are forbidden by the Volturi," Edward was no longer covering his face and had chimed in as if in an attempt to remind them all of something important.</p><p>"And they're conspicuous as hell," Emmett seemed to scoff in disgust at the idea of one being raised.</p><p>"So if they do Create a Newborn, it'll likely just be a single one, for the purpose of killing Bella," Rosalie said the words coolly and her gaze hadn't faltered since Bella had spoken.</p><p>"Why would they change their minds though?" Edward wondered aloud, confusion was clear as his brow pinched,</p><p>"It doesn't make sense."</p><p>Bella realized then that she couldn't just keep believing in coincidences, "Alice, is there a chance they know how your Gift works?"</p><p>Once more there was silence which caused Bella to simultaneously feel out of the loop and like she had all the answers.</p><p>"I've never met them before and the only Vampires who know about me are the Denali, the Volturi, and our family."</p><p>"What about when you were human? Did you have your gift then?"</p><p>Heavy was the weight of Rosalie's gaze on Bella, Emmett too was beginning to look at the Human girl like a stranger while Carlisle scooted himself closer to her on the love seat in an almost protective manner while Edward's jaw grew tight.</p><p>"I don't remember my human life Bella," Alice's voice was soft and sad. Bella wished then that she could have told her this in private, but at the moment it seemed important, like this was somehow a piece of the puzzle she hand't realized was vital.</p><p>Swallowing hard, Bella tried to be strong as she took a breath and responded, "In the Ballet Studio, James talked about hunting a Human girl who was put in an Asylum because she could see the future.</p><p>"That one of the staff Changed her to keep her safe. I didn't'- A lot was going on and I didn't think about it until recently.</p><p>"Alice if that was you, Victoria and Laurent might know how your gift works."</p><p>It was horrifying, the cold hand that gripped her deep inside at having not realized sooner how much this could mean to Alice, but Bella hadn't known that the Vampire possessed no memories of her Human life either. Yet, still in gnawed at her for being stupid and not sharing it right from the beginning.</p><p>How awful the timing of their separation had been and Bella had been so bent on helping Alice feel better she didn't want to bring it up on the first phone call, and now? It was all her fault if this was enough to kill her and Charlie.</p><p>"Isabella," Carlisle was on his knees in front of her and Bella realized she was trembling as he held her face in his hands softly,</p><p>"Why are you so distressed? You've potentially solved several of the mysteries that we may have been stuck on if you hadn't put in your insights.</p><p>"There's no reason to be upset, you've brought Alice hope, that when all this had passed, she may found out who she was."</p><p>"But I should have figured it out sooner!" Bella protested as bitterness over her inability to find a better moment for disclosure to Alice,</p><p>"I should have told Alice once I knew and she would have figured it out in seconds! We've been working at a disadvantage and we didn't even realize it!"</p><p>"I don't understand," Carlisle frowned it wasn't angry, just confused and a little bit helpless.</p><p>Jasper knew what she meant though, because he immediately said,"Because if they know how Alice's Gift works the entire Vision may be unreliable so long as they make sure to change their plans last second."</p><p>"Shit!" Emmett cursed as soon as the words registered and Edward took a deep breath but his expression was that of a boy about to commit a crime while Rosalie just continued to look at Bella like she was an alien.</p><p>Carlisle too offered Bella and odd expression, as if she was a bit of a puzzle, but said nothing save for, "Isabella, what matters is that we know now and that means we can start planning accordingly."</p><p>"And what is the plan?" Emmett prompted, clearly ready for a fight, he was obviously upset with their inability to act directly, "Because either the whole thing is a lie or Bella and her dad will be getting a visit from a Newborn."</p><p>"Neither are pleasant prospects," Carlisle looked over his shoulder slightly as he agreed with Emmett's sentiments fully. The Doctor gathered Bella's hands up in his own without moving from his spot kneeling before her.</p><p>"We start an around the clock guard," Edward declared and Bella immediately knew that was impossible.</p><p>"You can't watch me 24/7 , keep an eye out for Victoria and Laurent, while all staying fed," Bella reminded him of the most important thing that needed to be done if they were to all make it through this,</p><p>"Carlisle is spending the nights with me and you're already taking me to school. That has to be enough because your father cant just stop working.</p><p>"I mean, we still don't even know how Charlie's going to react if we tell him about us."</p><p>"Well if he doesn't approve you can just move in," Emmett's tone was only half joking and Bella tried to find it funny but with the situation being what it was, she couldn't manage it. Even Carlisle who seemed to always have a smile for the boy gave a soft,</p><p>"Emmett, be kind."</p><p>Bella wished she wasn't so weak.</p><p>"It wouldn't be wise for her to move in anyways," Edward chided his brother with harsh reminder of Bella's very Human inefficiencies,</p><p>"We couldn't risk having an accident, not with Bella. The fact is she smells too good for me to deal with 24/7.</p><p>"There's no telling what that'll do to Jasper, feeling my thirst all the time."</p><p>Bella took another deep inhale to fill herself with calming oxygen as her heart ached and a screaming anger filled her marrow,</p><p>"We have to think about Charlie too. If he get's caught in the middle there's no way they'll keep him alive.</p><p>"I can't- I refuse to say goodbye to him before I have to."</p><p>"You don't have to though!" Rosalie rose to her feet and she had such conviction in her voice that Bella half expected fire and brimstone to begin raining down,</p><p>"There's nothing this life can offer you but Carlisle and he'll have you, no matter what! You could grow old and grey and he won't leave you!</p><p>"You can do anything! Be anything! Why are you choosing this?!"</p><p>Carlisle at last rose to his feet and turned to his daughter," Rosalie now's not the time to-"</p><p>Practically against her own will Bella found herself on her feet with a hand on Carlisle's chest, cutting him off in his surprise.</p><p>"Because I'm selfish," Bella said the words and they were the truest ones she'd ever spoken aloud in all her years. All her life Bella had kept herself silent. Her worries and feelings came second to the people she loved</p><p>That was her power. She could swallow back her own dreams, hopes, desires, figure out someone else's, and help it come true. Meeting Carlisle had changed something inside of her though. A need that couldn't be squashed or fought grew like a gaping maw that would never be satisfied and while she was never good with feelings...</p><p>In that moment, Bella found the words.</p><p>They weren't shouted, cried, or screamed. Bella spoke them calmly with all the surety of truth that she could muster as she let her convictions guide her,</p><p>"It's not enough for me to know that Carlisle will love me until I'm dust in the ground, Rosalie. I'm selfish and I'm greedy and I want to to see it.</p><p>"Every smile, laugh, and happiness that he experiences I want it to belong to me. No one else. I won't die and put it to chance that he'll love me and only me forever I'm going live and make sure of it."</p><p>Heavy silence echoed through the room and Rosalie's eyes shone with something like confusion as Bella shuddered with the emotion overtaking her as she pressed forwards unwilling to stop,</p><p>"And I want to dance. Dancing was my first love that broke my heart and this body? This version of me wasn't good enough so I had to give it up. The one thing I ever asked for and I wasn't good enough.</p><p>"All my life I've lived for other people and put their happiness first! I'm still doing it every day. I moved here so my mom could live her dreams and before that I spent everyday doing bills, shopping, cooking, cleaning , and everything else Renee refused to do because she wanted to go out and have a good time!"</p><p>Carlisle gently put his arms around her but Bella wasn't finished yet, as she wiped her own hot tears which had begun to sting against the corners of her eyes,</p><p>"Choosing to join this family is the one selfish thing I've ever done in my entire life and I refuse to let anyone make me feel like it was the wrong choice. I won't back down from this.</p><p>"It's practically disgusting, but I'll risk Blood Lust, murder, pain, and violence if it means I can love all of you, stand by your sides forever and maybe get the chance to dance."</p><p>Still no one moved and Bella was sure nobody was even breathing after her emotional hurricane that had just rocked the living room. She refused to feel ashamed though,</p><p>"So let's figure out what we're going to do to keep all of you fed, Charlie safe, and maybe just maybe I'll get what I want too."</p><p>"Yes ma'am," Emmett spoke but it wasn't supposed to be funny or cute, it was honest and that was enough for Edward to agree with a simple,</p><p>"Right."</p><p>Rosalie's face twisted into something like anger and frustration before she let out a heaving sigh, then rushed out of the room to go upstairs.</p><p>"She'll be on the balcony," Alice's quiet voice informed them all, "She can hears us from there."</p><p>Emmett cast Bella an assuring smile before he, at a much more sedate pace, followed where Rosalie lead. Bella was glad he had gone to her. But still, guilt rose up in her for the chance that she may have hurt Rosalie's feeling, but Bella pushed it away. This was the one thing Bella was't going to compromise her own convictions in for the love of someone else. There would be time later to deal with this monster that seemed to keep growing between herself and Rosalie. At the moment Emmett was the best choice to speak to her.</p><p>In the end the Cullens came to an agreement on a small guard rotation, nothing too drastically different from what they had in place. Mostly it was Alice who had to maintain a stricter focus on Bella, and the pair of Vampires who threatened their family.</p><p>The fact was, Jasper had been right. There was no way of telling if their plan was truly the Vision Alice kept seeing, or if Laurent and Victoria were playing games with them. Bella thought that the best strategy was one that could be changed at a moments notice.</p><p>Hope for the best but expect the worst was a motto she might just start living by.</p><p>Especially since they all had agreed if they were going to tell Charlie, it would have to be before Alice and Jasper returned.The plan for a small get away, if Charlie was extremely disapproving, was amended to become a trip to Alaska in order to retrieve the wayward pair of Cullens in the Bella's time of need.</p><p>It was all they could do and as she sat with Carlisle once more while the others had fled the house to work off what energy remained built from the intensity of their meeting together, Bella felt the overwhelming need to say,</p><p>"I'm sorry.</p><p>"I know you expected me to say something romantic about how you'd waited long enough that you deserved to have me forever or how I didn't see the negatives because of how happy we'd be.</p><p>"It's probably disappointing to hear what I actually feel."</p><p>Bella expected him to say that he loved her anyways, perhaps even that with time she would grow and love him enough that he would be the only reason she needed, the only thing she wanted. What she didn't see coming was for Carlisle to get to his feet and put out both his hands as if in offering,</p><p>"Will you dance with me?"</p><p>Practically on instinct Bella gave a confused scoff at the display, "Carlisle you know I don't-"</p><p>She cut herself off as she realized what had almost left her mouth as the Vampire before her continued with, not what Bella was about to recite from habit, but the truth, "I know how you don't dance because you love it and you believe you're not very good at it?"</p><p>Bella couldn't help but huff out a laugh. He was right, and she had told him that, so her only protest left was, "There's no music."</p><p>Carlisle rushed over between heart beats to the stereo system in the cabinet above the movie shelf and pressed a button before once more he was standing with his hands out in offering directly in front of her. Just in time too, for the quiet tones of <em><span class="u">Open Arms</span></em> to begin playing gently and Bella couldn't' help but wonder who had been in control of the radio last.</p><p>Instead of complaining about 80's music though, she acquiesced and took hold of her Mate's hands. Once she had, Carlisle pulled Bella close. It was a reflection of that first night they ever spent together, only this time there was a quietly reverent ballad to set the rhythm as they swayed.</p><p>Bella couldn't understand why his reaction to her words, her apology had been to play Journey and ask that she dance. It made no sense as her brain desperately scrambled to figure out what message he was attempting to convey only to be stopped short the moment the chorus hit.</p><p>"Is this enough?" Carlisle practically whispered as they very slowly moved to the music and Bella wondered at the lyrics. That perhaps he had chosen the disc and song in the spaces between breaths just for her.</p><p>And as he pressed his cheek to the top of her head ever so gently, Bella closed her eyes in order to focus on his response to her earlier apology,</p><p>"Is this enough for you to see how happy your words have made me? How you have eased my I fears that the Bond had clouded your reasoning skills to the point that you had only chosen me for my own happiness?</p><p>"There is nothing , no words I could use to express how overjoyed I am that you have chosen this, us, for reasons beyond myself.</p><p>"And in the same breath to hear you express how you desire me so completely and utterly that you would sacrifice your very Humanity to own me until I have nothing left.</p><p>"How could I be disappointed?"</p><p>He pulled back to stare into her eyes as they fluttered opened and Bella could see him, the man who had expressly told her that he was willing to burn in hell to have her. Indeed this sin, should it prove to be one, would be the gentlest blasphemy there ever was.</p><p>"I guess I just keep underestimating you," Bella whispered feeling her love for this man grow into something black and inky like the depths of the void that couldn't be traversed, explored or even fathomed,</p><p>"Trust me, after this I'll never do it again."</p><p> </p><hr/><p> </p><p>Bella had pilfered his scarf.</p><p>She knew Carlisle had likely noticed but not cared, still though, Bella had stolen it and wrapped it around herself like a safety blanket. Not taking it off even as she sat in her truck in front of the Diner that she frequented every Wednesday with Charlie.</p><p>Jacob was already outside having some sort of animated conversation with Angela and another girl that Bella knew had to be Leah Clearwater. She had medium dark skin and jet black hair which she wore in a braid that came to her mid back.</p><p>The group had immediately noticed The Beast as Bella had pulled into the parking lot, her two friends had even offered her small cursory waves as she passed them by where they stood congregated around the Rabbit. It was a bit of a surprise until Bella absently recalled Angela had met Jacob at that bonfire.</p><p>It made sense then, for the easy going boy and the girl with overflowing kindness to reintroduce themselves to each other.</p><p>Pulling into a parking space, she cut the ignition and reminded herself that this was good for her.</p><p>Spending time away from the Cullens was healthy and as natural as those suburban mothers who had book clubs where they traded pie recipes.</p><p>It was difficult.</p><p>For Bella to climb out of her truck and make her way across the asphalt towards the group it was practically a journey. One where she had to switch her mind from 'Cullen Mode' to 'Human Mode' which felt more like 'Lying Mode' than anything else.</p><p>Absently, she fiddled with the ends of Carlisle's scarf as she approached the group, "Hope you all weren't waiting too long. Taking my stitches out took longer than expected."</p><p>"Nah you're good," Jacob smiled reassuringly before turning to Leah, "Leah this is Bella, you might remember her from such hits as forcing me to eat mud.</p><p>"Bella this is Leah, and I know you remember her because you said that she traumatized you."</p><p>"I said Charlie thought you were trying to kill me when you attempted to show me how to wrestle," Bella clarified and offered the familiar girl her hand,</p><p>"But I fully admit to feeding him mud."</p><p>Leah's reception was cold as she took the proffered hand and shook it with a firm grip, "I remember you. Didn't you stab yourself with a fishing hook?"</p><p>Immediately Jacob snorted and Angela looked at Bella like she was about to admit she'd died from tetanus and was actually a ghost. As for Bella herself she only smiled as she released Leah's hand before shoving it into her pocket, mirroring it's twin,</p><p>"Which time? In the thumb or my foot? Cause there was two."</p><p>"Damn," Leah genuinely seemed a bit horrified but Bella continued to be as open as she could manage in the face of this kind-of-but-not-really-stranger.</p><p>"So what's the wait time?" Bella decided it wasn't time to go over her many scars and exploits as the list was practically endless.</p><p>"Another few minutes," Angela replied gingerly, "Apparently a bunch of the basket ball guys got a table just in front of us so they have to seat them first."</p><p>Bella absently hoped that Mike wasn't there. Tyler she could handle, but Mike wasn't someone she wanted to see unless it was mandatory. After all, there were still a couple of shifts left for her at Newtons.</p><p>"So you've all just been waiting out here freezing?" Bella couldn't help the incredulous tone of her words, as she began to mess with Carlisle's scarf again.</p><p>"I'm not cold," Leah replied rather succinctly as Jacob just shrugged,</p><p>"It's not exactly snowing."</p><p>Bella looked at Angela and the girl sort of shuffled her feet, "I don't mind it. My coat's keeping me as warm as I need to be."</p><p>"It's October," Bella reminded them and when nobody moved she sighed," I'm not risking getting a cold."</p><p>She then moved towards the door and swung it opened so she slip into the building. Benches for the express purpose of patrons patiently passing the time within were provided and Bella wasn't going to take them for granted as she shuffled in, wiping her shoes on the welcome mat as the heated air washed over her.</p><p>There were 4 benches in the dinner for waiting parties. Two which faced each other right as one entered the establishment, the second pair were positioned the same way, just a few steps forward running perpendicular to the Host's podium</p><p>Angela was the first one to follow her in and was practically skipping through the door as Bella settled on the rather garish red bench to the left of the Podium.</p><p>Occupying the two benches by the entry way was an elderly couple, across from them a small family of 3. Bella was fortunate to grab the one she did as the seats parallel to her played host to Tyler Crowley, and a few boys she didn't recognize. Angela was right though as all of them were sporting Letterman Jackets.</p><p>"Bella! I did't know you hung out here," Tyler smiled brightly at her as if she was his friend, just in time for Leah and Jacob to amble their way into the foyer.</p><p>"Does eating count as hanging out?" Jacob mused aloud as he approached before Bella could get her brain together over the weird comment that Tyler had made.</p><p>"If it does Charlie and I hang out here every Wednesday," Bella smiled at her friend and feeling more comfortable with both Jacob and Angela, even Leah provided a bit of confidence.</p><p>"That sounds like it sucks," Leah replied and genuinely sounded kind of bummed by that tidbit of information but Bella just shrugged. She was used to it, and besides, Charlie only did it because he felt a little guilty to have her cooking all the time.</p><p>"It's not so bad," was her easy reply, "They have some good cobbler and I'd live off their fries if I could."</p><p>Tyler made no effort to introduce his friends as Leah and Jacob joined Angela and Bella on the bench across from him, but for some reason he insisted on keeping the conversation going.</p><p>"It's kind of weird to see you without Edward following around, but I guess I'm not with Lauren all the time so it's not that strange."</p><p>Jacob looked at Bella with an expression that was simultaneously smug and a bit disgusted as Leah asked,</p><p>"Who's Edward?"</p><p>"Cullen," was Jacobs succinct reply and Bella just wished that the Cullens weren't such a point of interest for the entire damn town.</p><p>"Ugh," Leah made the noise using the back of her throat so it came out closer to a retch than a groan,</p><p>"You actually hang out with those weirdos?"</p><p>"They're really nice, at least, Edward was really nice when we had our movie day," Angela defended without any heat, she was earnest and Bella thought it was nice to have someone in her corner,</p><p>"Dr. Cullen even let us order pizza even though he was at work."</p><p>Leah still looked skeptical but one of the boys with Tyler let out a, "Whoa! You've been to the Cullen's house?! I hears it's practically a mansion."</p><p>"Yeah!" Tyler nodded in agreement apparently having gotten over his reluctance to speak with Bella because of the incident with the van, "You gotta tell us what it's like."</p><p>Angela looked at Bella like she was nervous and didn't know what to say which was fair. After all, Bella was the one who was always over and Angela had only seen the place once. Even then she'd only been in the living room and the bathroom that was down the hall from the kitchen.</p><p>But Bella wasn't Angela who, if she could, would share polite details. Nor was she Jessica who would gush and talk about every last detail of the paintings upstairs and Alice's walk in closet full of designer clothes that were kept just out of range of Jasper's paints.</p><p>Bella wouldn't tell them about their enormous TV and stereo system with speakers built into the ceiling for surround sound or the endless amount of movies, CDs, and video games they owned. It wasn't anyone's business that Rosalie had an underground 10 car Garage while her main work room could contain 5 cars.</p><p>Or how Edward had a music room where he mostly played piano but was known to pick up the harp or violin should he not think a particular piece was suited for his instrument of choice.</p><p>Never would a word of detail on Carlisle's book and painting filled study pass her lips.</p><p>"They're just people," Bella reminded everyone stiffly instead, technically telling her first lie of the night as she clutched the soft tasseled ends of her borrowed scarf,</p><p>"And it's just a house."</p><p>Tyler seemed to take that as the dismissal it was as he shrugged a bit awkwardly before turning back to his friends.</p><p>"Do you deal with that all the time?" Jacob appeared a bit grossed out by the prying and Bella knew the feeling. Yet, his annoyance had an edge to it she wasn't used to seeing on the gentle boy.</p><p>"Not always," Bella shrugged a little bit helplessly because mostly people ignored her and lusted after her 'insider knowledge' from afar.</p><p>"Nosy assholes," Leah murmured a bit under her breath and Angela giggled a bit at it before the basketball boys were taken off to be seated relieving them of any stiltedness that might follow from her short response about the Culllens' house.</p><p>Determined not to ruin the mood of the evening before it really started Bella did what she did best,</p><p>"Doesn't matter, what does though is the fact that me and Jacob are supposed to buy a couple of junky Quads or Dirt Bikes next weekend and I refuse to be trapped alone with him in a junkyard where he'll be free to run wild.</p><p>" So, if either of you want to come and help me stay sane, just say so."</p><p>Angela didn't seem to excited at the prospect but simply said she'd think about it while Leah actually appeared intrigued by the offer. Jacob though?</p><p>"I'm not that bad!" He groaned a bit petulantly, "I mean if you need Leah to hold your hand because you don't know a muffler from a gear shift it's not my problem."</p><p>"Yes it is," Bella argued falsely, and she couldn't help the amusement that was shining through her tone, "Because you're the one who's supposed to teach me."</p><p>"She's got you there idiot," Leah smirked then, and Bella was happy that the other girl finally seemed to be having half decent time.</p><p>"I knew I shouldn't have introduced the two of you," Jacob groused but Angela was smiling at him like he was the funniest thing on the planet,</p><p>"If you two end up taking over the world I want a cut."</p><p>"You're cut is we won't kill you," Leah deadpanned and Bella was surprised at how loud her chortle was at the savage delivery of that.</p><p>"Aw C'mon!" Angela chuckle softly but her tone was a bit placating, "Jacob isn't so bad! If you keep him around you can find a use for him."</p><p>"Combination jester and mechanic," Bella couldn't help but tease which actually had Leah bark out a laugh before she covered her mouth, wearing a shocked expression as if she hadn't actually planned on having a good time.</p><p>"If you guys are just gonna just bully me I'm gonna leave and take Angela with me because she's the only one with a heart," Jacob groused again clearly unoffended but playing put upon nonetheless.</p><p>Bella reached over Angela in order to give the boy a light shoulder shove, "You know I only bully you because I care!"</p><p>"Oh so you harass your other friends too?" Jacob sounded genuinely shocked as well as teasing,</p><p>"Because Angela doesn't seem anywhere near as bullied as I am."</p><p>Bella rolled her eyes at him but said nothing as Angela just smiled brightly between the two while Leah appeared a bit more pondering over her observations on the pair.</p><p>Eventually the Host came around and seated them.</p><p>The early dinner was taken while Jacob began spouting theories over how the movie would end which had Leah threatening him with a spoon if he guessed right and spoiled it for her. As for Angela, she kept smiling and laughed a bit more at Jacob's jokes than she had in very long while. It was good to see her starting to feel a little better.</p><p>Of course the girl would take much more than a few days time to get fully back on her feet, but it was good to see Angela being a little less miserable.</p><p>By the time they were all line for concessions, Bella was surprised to find herself in a conversation with Leah about the best way to eat nachos.</p><p>"They have to be the pickled jalapenos or I'll die," Bella was explaining as Leah was shaking her head practically exhausted,</p><p>"Those things aren't spicy at all! What's the point of putting them on if they're not at least making your throat burn."</p><p>"It's a flavor thing," Bella argued good naturedly, "The tanginess with the cheap cheese is perfect when you have fresh tomatoes and the ground beef is seasoned right."</p><p>"Who the hell puts fresh tomatoes on nachos?!," Leah stuck out her tongue in clear disgust at the idea of it,</p><p>"Just put some salsa, what the hell is wrong with you?"</p><p>It ended up being pretty funny when neither of them ordered anything more than a drink since they had all just eaten a full meal which had Jacob griping for being the only one with a popcorn because, according to him, he was a growing boy.</p><p>Which Bella could see, because if she didn't know better then she'd think the kid had started steroids with how big he was getting. If she'd thought he'd grown the last time they talked it was even more obvious he was filling out.</p><p>The movie itself was no piece of art, but being an action thriller with a standard lackluster ending for a movie that was released in a October but wasn't a horror.</p><p>Strangely enough, Bella found herself perfectly happy to sit between Jacob and Leah while several explosions lit up the screen. Angela would giggle with Jacob every time a completely unrealistic stunt was shown while Leah would gag each time the lead male practically harassed the love interest with his affections.</p><p>All in all it was a pretty fun time as all 4 of them ambled out of the theater and Jacob sighed, "Well another weekend another movie to trash online."</p><p>"Honestly it wasn't as bad as the last one," Bella reasoned playing a bit of devil's advocate because they were pretty much the same when it came to quality,</p><p>"That one was at least about a father and daughter and had 100% less unrealistic romance."</p><p>"What the hell do you know about romance?" Jacob joked but Angela was on her side as she saddled up next to the boy casually,</p><p>"You don't have to know about romance to know that Bleak Streets was practically a horror movie."</p><p>"It's the whole Abduction Romance thing that's freaky as hell," Leah added her own two cents clearly miffed as she moseyed along besides Bella in front of the other two,</p><p>"It's why Terminator sucks."</p><p>"Amen!" Bella praised heartily getting Jacob to groan while Angela nodded sagely at his side behind Leah.</p><p>Whatever Jacob was going to say was cut off as a familiar voice edged over from behind them, "Oh! It's Bella and Angela.. And friends..."</p><p>Their quartet practically spun around in unison to find Jessica Stanley holding hands with Mike Newton looking ready to flee the country while Eric sort of shuffled his feet behind them, a girl Bella knew from History was next to him but her name couldn't be recalled beyond the fact that it began with an A sound.</p><p>"This isn't necessary Jessica," Bella immediately used the tone she only ever took with the Cullens when she wanted them to listen.</p><p>Leah cast her a startled glance but said nothing while Angela ducked her head, her good mood quickly vanishing. Bella could have kissed Jacob as the boy took hold of Angela's hand, nothing intimate, just a simple cupping gesture for support.</p><p>"I'm surprised you're not with Edward, or is he not talking to you since Alice and Jasper skipped town to get away from you," Jessica trudged forwards anyways and Bella forced herself not to fiddle with Carlisle's scarf.</p><p>Instead, Bella did the best thing she could and grabbed Leah's hand in the same way Jacob had taken hold of Angela's before turning back around, ready to walk away.</p><p>Leah, having no investment in the situation looked happy to leave, Angela sort of lightly tugged at the boy holding her hand but Jacob didn't seem like he wanted to budge until Bella called to him,</p><p>"C'mon Jake just leave them."</p><p>It was about to work too, but Eric had to open his mouth and say, "I can't believe you're here with another guy."</p><p>Which had Jacob releasing Angela's hand and spinning around like a hurricane while Leah and Bella's mind's apparently fused together. Because as Jacob pushed forwards to actually swing at the guy like he hand't said something standard and petty, Bella and Leah both leapt forwards to form a wall in front of their friend.</p><p>"Jacob don't be a freaking idiot he's just some loser!" Leah urged sounding more angry than anything else while Bella felt her own tone was just a tad bit more calm,</p><p>"It's not worth it. Let's just Angela get out of here."</p><p>Pressing a hand to his shoulder, Bella realized he was burning up and shook the realization away to deal with after Jacob had been calmed down from whatever rage had overtaken him so suddenly.</p><p>"That's cute," Jessica oozed condescension as Mike stayed silent and bore witness to the scene,</p><p>"Get your new boyfriend to pummel your old one. You dropped Eric so quick it makes me wonder..."</p><p>Jessica's tone was dripping with such licentious implications Bella had a brief insane moment where she wondered how bad it would be if she actually just let Jacob go.</p><p>"Does being a bitch take practice or is it natural?" Leah's tone suddenly sounded dangerous and Bella saw both Leah and Jacob begin seething while Angela's face was so shaken the girl looked read to cry.</p><p>Mustering all the authority she could Bella demanded, "Both of you let's go right now or so help me I'm telling both of your father's about you almost getting to a fight in the Megaplex!"</p><p>Whatever red the two had been seeing, that threat was enough to shake them from it as both Leah and Jake finally fell back and turned to walk away once more. Bella moved to follow but something snagged her.</p><p>Immediately a little voice told her that Jessica had grabbed the scarf.</p><p>"What are you their mother? I mean wearing this you do look 40."</p><p>Jessica was touching Carlisle's scarf.</p><p>Perhaps it was the stress from the family meeting piled onto the fact that she seemed to be the only one keeping her head. Maybe even then there was a bit of wild possessiveness over the man whom the scarf belonged to. Whatever it was, something inside her tore as she spun around. It took everything in Bella not to punch the smug look off the red headed girl's face. Bella instead grabbed the piece of cloth and yanked it out of Jessica's hand with such force it was surprising it didn't tear,</p><p>"Touch me again and find out what happens."</p><p>The cold steel of the threat was enough to have Jessica stepping back slack jawed, as if she hadn't thought Leah and Jacob would actually do something but Bella would. Or perhaps she was simply more afraid of a girl she knew.</p><p>Even worse, it was likely Jessica didn't care a whit about the Quileutes.</p><p>"C'mon Bella you know she didn't-" Mike was cut off as Bella shot him a severe look telling him exactly what she thought about whatever excuses he was going to make for his girlfriend.</p><p>"I'm sure Mr. Clearwater and Mr. Black will be happy to hear you and your friends were harassing their kids.</p><p>"So don't worry, I'll tell them for you."</p><p>Mike swallowed hard and Bella ignored the glances their confrontation had been earning as she pivoted on her heel and passed between Leah and Jacob, then grabbed Angela's hand,</p><p>"Let's get you home."</p><p>"Thanks you guys," Angela whispered as they all exited the cinema and Bella couldn't help but feel none of them really deserved it.</p><p>"It's no problem," Jacob muttered as Leah echoed the sentiment.</p><p>"Are you alright?" Bella turned to the boy, now that they were away from the potential alteration she could worry,</p><p>"You're practically a space heater with the way you're burning up."</p><p>Leah frowned and placed a quick hand on Jacob's face as if to confirm Bella's observation, "Holy shit Jacob! I'm surprised your not keeling over!"</p><p>Bella frowned as the boy took a breath but shook Leah off, "I'm fine."</p><p>"You better tell Billy," Bella worried as Angela appeared equally distressed over the development, likely the stress from before stacking.</p><p>"I'm driving you home," Leah stated, not even giving him the option to refuse, "He'd kill me if I let you drive with a fever like that."</p><p>"Fine whatever," Jacob didn't seem happy at all with the development, "I feel fine though, it's probably nothing."</p><p>"There's a flu going around," Angela pipped up helpfully as she adjusted her glasses, still obviously shaken by the encounter that had just occurred, "Better safe than sorry I think."</p><p>He gave the Angela a tight smile but stopped complaining as Bella grew impossibly grateful that Jacob wasn't completely unreasonable.</p><p>"Hey, Leah, can I have your number?" Bella suddenly realized she had to act fast, "If this lump gets sick I'll need a way to invite you out again."</p><p>Leah once again looked surprised as they reached the area they'd all parked in but made quick work of pulling a pen out of her purse and writing her number on piece of scrap paper,</p><p>"Just don't go giving it out."</p><p>Bella agreed not to as she took the paper and watched Jacob climb into the Rabbit, still a bit upset, no doubt about being driven in his own car. She decided then and there she'd call both Leah and Jacob in the morning to make sure that he wasn't too sick and that she hadn't caught whatever he was nursing.</p><p>As the pair pulled away Angela sighed, it was a bit melancholy but her words were hopeful, "Ignoring that whole thing with Jessica, I had a good time."</p><p>"Me too."</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0009"><h2>9. Chapter 9</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Communication is sexy</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Charlie had gone to work by the time Bella's alarm went off.</p><p>Carlisle too, had left extremely early in the morning. He'd tucked another note in her phone, the paper's edges stuck outs slightly and when Bella unfolded she found the words, <em>Have a wonderful day</em>, in his precise yet quick penmanship.</p><p>The day before had been exhausting to the point that part of Bella wanted to just stay home and tap out but if she was anything, she was determined. So, she crawled out of bed and got dressed because that was just what you had to do sometimes.</p><p>You had to rely on your 365 year old boyfriend's saccharine love notes to get you through the day.</p><p>Bella absently munched on her rather lacking breakfast of toast and eggs as she turned her phone over in one hand. Leah's number had been punched in then saved the moment she'd gotten to the truck and while Bella knew it would be weird, she supposed one of them had to make the first phone call.</p><p>Still though, Bella put it off as she finished her eggs and toast then somehow managed to be out the front door just as Edward pulled up to the curb.</p><p>She gave him a lack luster smile as he opened the passenger side  door for her, he returned the gesture winningly as he pulled off his sunglasses and handed them to her, "You look like you need these more than me."</p><p>Rolling her eyes Bella took them and plopped them on her face before she proceeded to buckle in while Edward loaded himself back into the vehicle and pulled them away form the curb,</p><p>"I thought you were sleeping better with Carlisle."</p><p>"I am," Bella pulled out her phone and decided it was now or never because Jacob needed a call too, but that could be done after her shift at work,</p><p>"So imagine how bad it would be if he hadn't stopped by."</p><p>Edward pulled a face that told her exactly how worried he was about how exhausted she apparently looked as Bella pressed call on Leah's number.</p><p>Leah was a year older than Bella herself but seemed to be taking time off of school for reasons only she and her family knew. Bella didn't know of the other girl worked or not but was happy to find her answering the phone after only 3 rings.</p><p>"Hello?"</p><p>"Hey Leah, it's Bella Swan, I was just calling to make sure you're feeling alright," Bella did her best to sound pleasant and suitably concerned,</p><p>"I know Jacob was looking sick and I was hoping you didn't catch whatever he did."</p><p>"I'm fine, but according to Billy the idiot is puking his guts out," Leah replied simply as if it was no bother at all that the boy she'd driven home had gotten seriously ill.</p><p>Bella pressed lips together as worry over her friend began to fill her, "I'll see if I can call him later to see how he's holding up.</p><p>"But I was also wondering if you'd like to hang out, do a whole sleep over thing with Angela. I mean, I know Angela needs it and God knows I need a break."</p><p>"It's not gonna be like, talking about boys and watching romcoms right?" Leah's tone was a bit sour and Bella tried to remind herself that the older girl was supposedly suffering from a bad break up.</p><p>"Nah, it's gonna be more poker with fancy pajamas and horror flicks," Bella offered, as she was the one setting it up and the whole itinerary was up to her.</p><p>"I'm not gonna lie that actually sounds fun," her reluctant tone was a bit disheartening but the words themselves boded well for Leah's attendance,</p><p>"When you planing it for?"</p><p>"Well," Bella mulled it over and knew Charlie would be thrilled over the fact that she was hanging out with girls her age, especially if one of them was Harry's daughter, so she could pick whenever,</p><p>"How's this weekend sound? I mean junking's happening next weekend and I'm trying not to fill to many because I'm supposed to go fishing with Charlie."</p><p>"Yeah sure, what the hell," Leah folded like cardboard sounding for all the world like she had nothing to lose and everything to gain.</p><p>A smile broke out across Bella's face and she hadn't known that she was so hopeful, "Great, I'll tell Angela. Bring a movie if you want but I'm buying food."</p><p>"Cool," was the only reply forthcoming before Leah hung up without ceremony.</p><p>"Friendly," Edward observed sarcastically and Bella closed her phone as she cast him a long suffering stare.</p><p>"She's going through some things. Jacob said it was a bad break up."</p><p>"You're going through things," the Vampire countered plainly as if her problems were more important just because they were different,</p><p>"She's probably just angsting."</p><p>"Not everyone can be targeted by vengeful Vampires Edward," she reasoned trying her best to be sensible,</p><p>"To Angela and Leah, getting their hearts broken is the worst thing that's ever happened and that makes it just as important as my problems."</p><p>"The world isn't exactly ending for them," Edward reminded Bella of all that she stood to lose if Victoria and Laurent go their way,</p><p>"They're human and that means they each have a flexible heart that will fall in and out of love as many times as it wants to.</p><p>"On top of that they're not even adults but they're treating puppy love like the real thing, as if they'll never recover."</p><p>Bella wondered if things looked so small to him because his Gift had allowed him to see a million people go through the same things over the century he'd been alive, or if Edward was simply biased because of his affection for her. He didn't come off as trying to be cruel or condescending though so she tried to help him see her own point of view,</p><p>"It's a sliding scale. If I'd gotten my heart broken I'd probably act like the world was ending too."</p><p>It was a surprise as Edward choked out a laugh that didn't sound humorous at all, "If Carlisle broke your heart it would be because he was dead, and trust me, I've seen broken bonds. Some Vampires have gone insane from it.</p><p>"So yeah, it would be the end of the world."</p><p>"You're not being fair," Bella protested, a new theory bloomed. Perhaps his viewpoint was skewed simply because he hadn't thought of love from any stand point other than a Vampire's for far too long,</p><p>"It doesn't matter if they weren't really in love or they were, the point is they're brokenhearted. That hurts no matter what your age or species is."</p><p>Edward hummed a bit at that, as if he was trying to reconciled that view with his own, "They're lucky you're so wiling to help out. I mean, if you needed someone, who would you go to?"</p><p>"I can always talk to Carlisle," Bella reminded him easily, and it was true, if things got too much she knew that he was only a phone call away, and late at night when the world was asleep she could whisper to him if she needed it.</p><p>Edward didn't look completely sold on that but said nothing as they pulled into the parking lot of the school.</p><p>As usual the made their approach together and entered the Cafeteria, Edward went off to get his breakfast while Bella slid into a seat at their table happy to find that Angela was already there munching on what appeared to be a slice of breakfast pizza.</p><p>"Whats up? You sleep well?" she asked Angela without even bothering to take off Edward's sunglasses. Carlisle's scarf was still at home around Bella's shoulder's as well. It was all a bit shameless but it wasn't like anyone could tell.</p><p>What teenager had seen the man dressed casually? And why would they memorize the kind of scarf he wore?</p><p>"Could have been better," Angela smiled but it was weak, clearly she too didn't enjoy her night too much after that scene in the theater.</p><p>Just in time for Bella to realize that Jessica was trying to murder her through a really pathetic attempt at a bone chilling gaze, Edward plopped himself down in the chair next to her as he practically tossed his pizza on the table before sliding it in Bella's direction,</p><p>"There a reason why everyone seems to think that you attacked Jessica in a blind rage at the Megaplex?"</p><p>Bella pulled his pizza towards herself and pulled one of the little sausages off and popped it in her mouth,</p><p>"Because she was trying to start a fight with me and Angela but almost got Jacob and Leah."</p><p>Edward tilted his head at her like she was crazy, but his expression was still clearly amused and Bella realized, yeah, she hadn't exactly broken it down for Carlisle the night before but at the time she was too exhausted to even think about the ordeal again.</p><p>Picking another sausage off the pizza she frowned, the memory of what had happened caused Bella's chest to stir as if it had happened all over, "Jessica also may have grabbed <em>my scarf</em>..."</p><p>Suddenly he looked like he'd witnessed a gruesome murder as he spared a quick glance to Angela before leaning forwards and whispering, "Bella, you need to tell me what you did to her."</p><p>Angela was beginning to look between them with a bit of suspicion while Bella felt a creeping worry start to crawl it's way up her spine at the intensity of the echoing of the previous night's emotions rushing through her,</p><p>"I just snagged it back and pretty much dared her to touch me again."</p><p>So great was the sigh of relief that Edward let out that it was even cathartic for Bella herself. The Vampire looked at Angela again, which made Bella realize that he probably wanted to explain why he was so worried, and why it had effected her so much, but couldn't.</p><p>Bella snagged the last bit of meat off the pizza, slid it back to Edward, and frowned, "Is it... a thing?"</p><p>"Yes it's... a thing," Edward replied softly but left it at that as Angela was clearly becoming worried about their intensity.</p><p>"Are you guys alright?" the poor girl had stopped eating her pizza at some point so she could continue to stare worriedly at them.</p><p>A thing.</p><p>Bella tried to suss out what that meant but she couldn't really figure it out. She was Human after all, and any instinctual behaviors she exhibited would be due to the Bond. Which to her knowledge simply drew her to Carlisle, kicked her natural desire for him into overdrive, made her less susceptible to Vampiric Beauty, and shut off the danger alarm in her brain in the face of his species.</p><p>Unless it was responsible for the sudden possessiveness she had felt but that hardly quantified because it was a scarf, not Carlisle himself.</p><p>"Yeah," Bella forced the words out as her curiosity about what had happened burned at the back of her mind like a bonfire,</p><p>"I just don't want Charlie hearing I got in a fight when I didn't."</p><p>Because she was the kind of girl to leave people to themselves when they needed it, Angela dropped it in favor of a separate topic,</p><p>"Well, I already have a 9 o'clock curfew so if my parents hear about what happened they can't do too much more."</p><p>"Why do you have such an early curfew?" Bella couldn't help the frown on her face, Angela wasn't exactly the rebel hearted girl who sneaked out late and was in danger of drag racing and drinking.</p><p>Angela seemed a bit taken aback by the words before she collected herself, "Those bear sightings.</p><p>"I mean there were those animal attacks and then people have been seeing bears all over the forest roads."</p><p>Bears.</p><p>Bella felt like there was something she was missing as Edward suddenly looked uncomfortable, if he were human the boy would practically be squirming in his seat which was odd.</p><p>"Well, do you think you'd be allowed to have sleep over at my house?" Bella hoped that it would be alright, it would be weird for it to be just her and Leah. Angela was shy, but out going enough that their little trio would be much more palatable.</p><p>Taking a moment to think Angela took a nibble at her pizza, "It should be fine, as long as it's on the weekend and we don't go anywhere too late."</p><p>"I'm just planning for pizza and horror movies, maybe cards or something," Bella shrugged a bit hoping that wasn't too weird for a sleep over. Leah hadn't seemed to think so, which was good sign right? For a moment Bella wished that her sleep overs with Alice had been a bit more traditional,</p><p>"When I called Leah I told her to bring a movie and we can do it this weekend."</p><p>Smiling brighter than she had all morning Angela nodded, "That sounds really fun, I'll ask my parents but I'm pretty sure it will be fine."</p><p>The rest of the school day past fairly quickly. There were of course the few people who cared gossip so they whispered about how Bella had 'attacked' Jessica or how she was crazy. Bella tried her level best to ignore it all and focus on having a good day despite the suspicious glances.</p><p>She reminded herself that she only cared about the opinions of a select few people and if she was going to worry about anyone, her brain should be trying to work out how to approach Rosalie for an armistice or how to tell Charlie about everything because honestly Alice wasn't going to be able to tell her until they'd worked the hows out.</p><p>Still though, having so many people glance at her like a zoo animal about to go on a rampage was enough to have Bella feeling a bit antsy by the time lunch arrived.</p><p>Because of the new arrangement, Bella had brought her work uniform with her and left it in Edward's car. The Vampire would be driving her to Newtons and it was just a small change, which was noticed immediately by Mike.</p><p>After Edward promised to pick her up and drove away, Bella had rushed to the bathroom in the store in order to change into her uniform for her 4 hour shift.</p><p>Immediately after she stepped out Mike was practically tap dancing behind the register as he nervously shuffled around. It hit her then that he was an absolute moron who really never thought anything through. Really, he spent all that time with Jessica and had probably just kept telling himself that Bella wouldn't be working much longer at the store so it was fine.</p><p>The fact was though, that she hadn't finished just yet and he probably hadn't thought of the consequences of escalation while she was still an employee.</p><p>"You didn't drive your truck today," he practically mumbled nervously as if she had actually attacked him and his girlfriend in public like Jessica was telling people. Or maybe he was just feeling guilty over it but didn't care because he thought having a girlfriend outweighed any sins she committed.</p><p>"Yeah, people who love you get protective when you're getting harassed," Bella replied not even hiding her opinion on the matter. Sure, Edward couldn't give a dime for Mike and Jessica's idiocy, but the Human boy didn't know that it was really about murderous Vampires. Really what was the difference? If she was living a normal Human life it would be par for the course to have a friend drive her because of harassment.</p><p>"Chief Swan doesn't know about.. Um.. What happened... Right?" Mike looked sick at the thought and Bella, for a moment, wished it was the kind of thing she was happy to tell Charlie just to see the kid squirm.</p><p>Call it vindictive but she was angry. Not just about the scarf, that was just a catalyst.</p><p>No.</p><p>Bella's anger was bubbling because they'd all thought they could get away with it because Angela was the kind of girl who shrunk back in the face of conflict combined with the fact that Jacob, Leah, and Bella were nobodies to them. Sure Bella hung out with the Cullens but her and Edward weren't <em>Official</em> so in everybody's eyes that meant she was basically a hanger on.</p><p>Something very nasty inside of her almost replied, 'No but I'm gonna tell Dr. Cullen and boy is he not gonna like it.'</p><p>But Bella wasn't petty, or that big of an idiot so she just gave him an even, neutral expression that she made sure to pour every ounce of disapproval and disbelief into which shut him up for the rest of the day.</p><p>She had a feeling her strange mood from the night before and unwillingness to relive the scene so immediately had effected Carlisle a bit more than she thought. That was just a theory though, one which was born from the fact that when her shift was over, and Edward's Volvo pulled up to where she was waiting in front of the shop, her chest exploded with warmth.</p><p>It was a bit jarring but as she looked to the driver through the windshield Bella found, not the telepath, but Dr. Carlisle Cullen looking like he practically came straight from his shift in the ER.</p><p>Quickly, so that nobody who cared to look would notice, Bella climbed into the passenger seat. Equally as eager to leave, Carlisle was pulling out of the parking space before Bella was finished clicking her buckle into place.</p><p>The moment she had though, Bella leaned over the center console feeling for all the world normal while Carlisle turned to her quickly to grant her requested peck on the lips before turning his attention back to the road.</p><p>"I'm starving," Bella sighed as she plopped down into her chair feeling much more relaxed than she had all day.</p><p>"Would you like to pick something up?" Carlisle offered easily and Bella wished that they'd had time to just get pots and pans so she could make something at the Cullens but that was another thing that needed to wait.</p><p>"Sure, just a quick burger should be good," Bella sighed, basking in the relaxed atmosphere of the ride.</p><p>"How was your day then?" Carlisle's voice was soothing and it was clear he had been worried after she'd wanted only his quiet the night before, how Bella ached only to feel him near without needing words. It was telling how well he knew her that the Vampire hadn't pried, nor was he pushing her to share even so many hours later.</p><p>"Pretty tiring considering Jessica's been telling people I attacked her at the Megaplex, Mike is being an absolute jerk and only looking to cover his own ass all while I'm trying to figure out how I'm going to tell Charlie that I'm dating a 365 year old Vampire, " Bella was vomiting words at that point but Carlisle simply listened patiently as he pulled into the Drive Thru at Bartelli's.</p><p>A tiny local hamburger joint.</p><p>They were teetering here, on the edge of being seen together in Edward's car by someone who knew them. It was such a horrifying thing to realize too late and Bella reached for her buckle as she whispered,</p><p>"I'm climbing into the back seat."</p><p>"I'm not having my Mate climb into the backseat," Carlisle replied suddenly very serious, as if she'd hurt his feelings. Bella knew that he meant well but they couldn't be acting so shameless.</p><p>"It's not a crime to pick up my son's friend from her shift at work, we're not doing anything wrong.</p><p>"Besides, in less than 3 weeks it's not going to matter because Charlie will know."</p><p>Bella swallowed realizing that his words were true. They had a mandatory 'Before Halloween' requirement on that particular bagged feline.</p><p>"But," he continued with such understanding Bella couldn't help but love him just a little more, "If you genuinely think it's an issue, then you can hide in the backseat."</p><p>"Like a criminal," Bella huffed out a bit frazzled as he echoed, "Yes, like a criminal."</p><p>While he was clearly a little bit amused by that last addition, Carlisle was keeping the car from pulling up to the speaker to order so that Bella could make her decision. There was no one behind them yet but she knew that dinner was about to start and that wouldn't be true for very long.</p><p>For a moment, Bella wondered if she was becoming overly paranoid.</p><p>She'd never had real friends who were close enough that she didn't mind being driven around by their parents. So she tried to think, if Harry Clearwater ended up telling her that Leah was busy and so he'd come to pick her up instead, what would Bella do?</p><p>Get in the car without question probably.</p><p>Because Harry was a trustworthy guy who had known her father for years.</p><p>Technically Charlie had known Carlisle for a few years before Bella even came into the picture. Her dad respected and trusted the Doctor too. The men had worked together.</p><p>"Alright, I'll stay in the front seat," she sighed, knowing that she had probably become overly cautious since Carlisle had been laying with her every night and Bella was still wearing his scarf. Something had to give and someone had to notice.</p><p>But, Bella reminded herself that that nobody who knew her worked at the burger joint.</p><p>Besides, the only people who went to Bartelli's were old people, cops, and tourists that got hungry on their way to Seattle. They were 24/7 and had several 'healthy options' including zucchini fries. On top of that, Jessica didn't have a job while Mike worked with her, Tyler, she was pretty sure had some sort of internship with his dad while Eric bagged groceries at the local Food Mart.</p><p>The likely hood of someone she knew actually seeing them together in the drive thru was tiny so she took a breath as well as a modicum of comfort in that knowledge.</p><p>Carlisle dared to give her a peck on the cheek and Bella blushed as she shook her head at his rather reckless behavior in the borrowed vehicle. Her decision had him pulling up and, at Bella's request, getting a small combo meal.</p><p>As they idled there in the line he turned to her again, "I'm sorry about your apparent falling out with Jessica and the subsequent smear campaign she seems to be on."</p><p>Biting her lip and feeling vulnerable Bella reminded herself that this was the one person who would never judge her. Hadn't she promised to stop underestimating his feelings for her?</p><p>"I'm just scared about what's going to happen when Angela, Leah, and Jacob all find out I've been lying to them.</p><p>"What if they think you're taking advantage of me and say they can't support me? They'll leave and I'll have to deal with everyone thinking I'm some sort of Sugar Baby for the rest of my Human life."</p><p>Carlisle took her hand and entwined their fingers over the console, a silent show of solidarity as he made an attempt to provide comfort to her,</p><p>"I wish I could ease your worries and say that no such thing will happen, but all I can do is say that we can't control what other's think.</p><p>"That, and if we manage to ease your father's worries regarding our age gap then the worst of rumors can be avoided."</p><p>"But what if we can't convince Charlie? What if he says I'm not allowed to see any of you again? I can't move in, and I can't move out on my own."</p><p>The line began to move and Carlisle followed it as he very steadily replied, "Isabella, let's go for a walk when we get to the house. There's no need for you to raid Alice's closet immediately and I believe that you'll be very pleased to see the cottage down our forest walk.</p><p>"It needs some repairs but if we start now it will be in livable condition before Halloween."</p><p>The car stopped in front of the service window and Bella swallowed hard at the realization of what he was saying, what plan he'd likely been holding close to his chest, worried she would think he was forcing her hand, "You'd live with me in a cottage?"</p><p>"I'd live with you at the bottom of the sea," Carlisle replied but his smile dropped immediately as it came before he yanked his hand out of hers. The service window suddenly opened as Carlisle rolled his window down.</p><p>The change was jarring but Bella had to remind herself that this was fine. They'd talk more during a small jaunt into the woods.</p><p>Carlisle was getting his card back as Bella tried her best not to look over at the window. A girl asked if he wanted any sauces and he turned to Bella,</p><p>"Isabella?"</p><p>Not wanting to be rude she turned to look at him and her eyes met the drive thru worker's. It was like something out of a horror movie as the sea green eyes of Lauren Mallory stared back at her equally thunderstruck.</p><p>"Just ketchup is fine Dr. Cullen."</p><p>Lauren clearly heard the practically mumbled words as she slowly nodded before slamming the service window closed. Bella noted that Carlisle looked distinctly confused but hid it with what was likely centuries practice at a poker face.</p><p>Instead of Lauren, a very bored looking middle aged woman returned to the window and handed the bag of food over with little fuss and Bella felt like she'd just been in a fever dream and had gone temporarily insane from stress.</p><p>As Carlisle pulled out of the drive thru and began his way down to the house he took a moment of silence as Bella stared a bit confused at her bag of food before he finally broke,</p><p>"What just happened?'</p><p>"That was Lauren Mallory."</p><p>A thoughtful frown pulled at the corner of his mouth, "The Banker's daughter?"</p><p>"Yeah," Bella sort of said the words still shocked at seeing the blonde girl wearing a fast food uniform.</p><p>Lauren Mallory was so popular that she acted like the only man she dressed for was God himself. She'd always just been there to Bella, far to popular to even look at the Police Chief's daughter, far too pretty to have the same boys after them.</p><p>Though Bella kind of wondered why Lauren hadn't given her hell over the Cullen situation.</p><p>Really the other girl was an untouchable concept outside of Bella's purview and only recently came to her peripheral as 'Maybe Tyler's Girlfriend I'm not sure'. The Mallorys were rich, not as monied as the Cullens, but well off enough that Lauren didn't need to be working at a fast food joint.</p><p>Bella had her own secret though and wasn't about to be prying into other people's.</p><p>"That was weird but I can live with it," she ended up shrugging it off as she stuck her hand into the bag, digging around for a french fry to nibble on,</p><p>"I mean who are <em>we</em> to question it?"</p><p>Carlisle shook his head a bit but there was a light smile on his face once more as Bella took a bite of her fry, "You want one?"</p><p>"Don't be gross," he said in such a way that Bella couldn't help but chuckle a bit and that was basically the mood for the rest of their ride to the house.</p><p> </p><hr/><p> </p><p>The forest walk wound it's way from the side of the house with the garage, Bella had seen the small white stone steps many times before and simply not asked because it led into the woods. A place she wasn't very keen to go as the outdoors was not exactly her favorite place to spend her time.</p><p>But after finishing her meal in the dining room, Carlisle had taken her hand in order to lead her down that small winding path.</p><p>It was entirely lined with shrubs which she knew would be green, likely blooming with flowers and life in spring, but at the moment all their color was faded as the foliage insisted on remaining dormant to retain life in the cold.</p><p>"This must be breathtaking in the spring," she sighed as the reached a suddenly clearing in the winding path behind the house.</p><p>Carlisle had been nothing but truthful as there in the open area sat a small, perhaps one or two room cottage that resembled more of a cabin than any rustic cottage Bella had ever seen. It had two windows up front and chimney made of red brick which was lovely because the rest of the home too appeared made from stones of various browns and grays. When the roofing was laid, the color was no doubt a beautiful natural reddish shade but likely needed work as now many areas were faded.</p><p>It had probably seen better days and Bella wondered at the fact that it wasn't so run down as she imagined a home which had been sitting for what must have been more than a few decades.</p><p>He responded to her by kissing her temple and when he spoke his lips grazed her hairline, "It will be."</p><p>After a moment of Bella staring at the over grown weeds as well as the tangle of thorns and thistle in the garden beds in front of the property Carlisle began moving again, tugging her along gently,</p><p>"Would you like to see inside?"</p><p>Bella beamed at the prospect, "Of course it looks amazing."</p><p>Very carefully the Vampire guided her through the overgrown grass, every once in a while he would even lift her over a rock or particularly large root which Bella didn't mind at all as Carlisle would grant her a peck on the lips each time he place her feet back on solid ground.</p><p>Entering the cottage was another story.</p><p>Lonely.</p><p>That was how Bella would describe the bungalow, it was such a lonely little place that was barren of furniture and any sort of decoration.</p><p>Some of the wooden floor boards had cracked and a few of the wall bore scratched, likely from having played host to wild creatures. Leaves were strewn a bout, the reason for those things were clear as she found the bedroom, only to realized the window which looked out of the side of the house was broken inwards. Likely from an animal.</p><p>All the while Carlisle held her hand through the two room cottage. It's kitchen practically ancient but the sitting room did indeed poses a fireplace which appeared functional.</p><p>"Carlisle, this would need a lot of work," Bella frowned, as she wondered at his assurance that it could all be done in nothing but a few weeks.</p><p>"I have the funds," Carlisle assured her lightly and she knew he'd pay any price for her but Bella looked down at their joined hands as she confessed,</p><p>"I just- It feels like you keep buying me things and while I know you don't care about the money, it still feels strange to accept it."</p><p>"Isabella, you still have 5 years left until your apparent age is equal to my own," Carlisle reminded her softly as he cupped her chin with his thumb and forefinger, guiding her brown eyes to meet his own topaz ones,</p><p>"This would be a perfect place to stay while you visit your father without opening the main house. I could wait here for you in the day and not worry about being seen.</p><p>"After all by the time you're 22 people will be suspicious if I'm not beginning to show a few signs of aging. According to them I'll be nearing 40."</p><p>"So you've been planning on renovating it for a while," Bella observed as he sort of reached out a bit helplessly with her free hand only to gently place it on his hip,</p><p>"And this is just moving your plans up."</p><p>"Yes, but I would tear it down and build an entire house here if you wanted," Carlisle began to grin mischievously and Bella privately thought the expression had promise,</p><p>"I'd buy you and Island and name it for you if you'd let me."</p><p>"Save that for our honeymoon," Bella teased a bit incredulously but knowing he wasn't fully joking she added, "Which is a mostly a joke, don't get me and Island without telling me first because that's terrifying."</p><p>Carlisle laughed a bit as if he couldn't help it, then he proceeded to move his hand from her chin to fully cup Bella's cheek softly, "You have to remember that I've been waiting a very long time for you. I have over 300 years of love I have been saving just for you."</p><p>Bella blinked slowly at the words, "I mean, not all for me. You've obviously had lovers before."</p><p>As she said the words his expression seemed to fall into a more concerned thoughtful one so Bella tried to assure him as she stepped closer, putting him in kissing range,</p><p>"Not that I mind. Living endlessly not knowing if you'd ever find someone to be with forever must have been difficult. I'll never be upset knowing that you shared a bed with a lover because it got to be too much."</p><p>"Isabella," Carlisle's tone was practically tortured as he gazed down at her, "I know it must be difficult for you to comprehend but I would never share such an intimate connection with someone if I didn't love them.</p><p>"It goes against my morals and my goal of pleasing God for the chance of salvation. Marriage to a Vampire who drank Human blood would be appalling.</p><p>"By the time I did know women who drank Animals I had already begun to believe that there may be someone out there I could Bond with."</p><p>Pressing his cold forehead against her's Carlisle whispered like a prayer, "Though you have not waited for me, I have waited for you. Isabella unto you I will surrender you my flesh, soul, and existence.</p><p>"The only first I could not give was a kiss, as when I was a  very small boy I fancied I'd marry the milliner's daughter because she was the fastest runner in our townage."</p><p>Bella choked out a desperate laugh at his anecdote but her heart felt like the engine of a jet as it roared in her ears at the revelation he'd just bestowed upon her.</p><p>"Partly my concern about us having sex is because of the fact that I know I will be sorely tempted to lose my self control as I give myself to you," Carlisle closed his eyes as if he was apologizing for his lack of experience, for waiting nearly half a millennia so that he could only ever be with the one he'd call wife.</p><p>So he could lose his virginity to Isabella Swan and marry her in the way of his Kind in one act of love.</p><p>"Don't apologize for being a virgin," Bella pressed her lips to his own stony pair, chilled like marble but so much more beautiful,</p><p>"Some people never have sex, and some people wait because they want to. I just- I just thought it was reasonable to assume you'd had sex because you'd been alive for so long but if you haven't then that's fine too."</p><p>"It hasn't been difficult," He nuzzled her nose softly in a way that Bella had grown to love, as it was intimate yet gentle in it's simplicity,</p><p>"I've always been a man who preferred literature, art, and philosophy to the curves of a woman.</p><p>"Though, upon meeting you I began to understand what other men found so appealing."</p><p>Bella couldn't help it as her cheeks began to burn at the compliment, Carlisle moved both his hands to her hips as he continued his praise of her,</p><p>"Your curves, the softness of your lips, even the way your hair flows around you. It could bring a sinner to change his ways and lead a saint to sin. Isabella you are all that God intended a woman to be. All kindness and understated goodness paired with a heart that could save the devil himself for it's capacity of acceptance.</p><p>"And I long for the day I can lay down with you and show you just how much I have missed you until you came into my life."</p><p>It was so much. Bella felt like her heart was about to pulse out of her chest and latch onto his in a strange ritual of sharing souls as they stood there in the run down cottage simply holding each other.</p><p>She knew that she wasn't so pretty.</p><p>But that was how Carlisle saw her, every inch of her he desired in the same way Bella lusted after him.</p><p>"I'd say something about how handsome you are but I'd probably just make a fool of myself," Bella whispered as she swallowed back her own feeling of being unequal to such praise,</p><p>"I'm sure you've heard it all before."</p><p>"Not from you," Carlisle replied as he pulled her against flush him a bit more forcefully than he likely intended,</p><p>"And you're the only woman whose opinion that matters when it comes to such things."</p><p>"Well privately I've always thought you were as beautiful as a breeze on an Arizona summer day, " Bella felt a bit silly as she said the words but he didn't laugh, nor did he tease her so she went on,</p><p>"And I keep thinking that with your kindness, generosity, and self control that you're practically a wonder to behold. It's an honor to love someone like you."</p><p>"The pleasure and privilege is mine," Carlisle replied with such affection it made her knees weak.</p><p>It was funny that after such a conversation they were able to discuss colors and woods for the cottage. Drapes and furniture, the first home of many they would decorate together.</p><p>All the while, in the back of her mind, Bella kept wondering about their first time together, what it would be like if no one actually had ever driven the bus before, as it were.</p><p>Terribly awkward, most likely, Carlisle was going to have to practically grit his teeth and suffer through what would have to be slow and gentle by Human standards, as a Vampire it might practically be torture.</p><p>On top of that Bella wondered at how he claimed he feared a loss of control from eagerness and excitement. How would that translate as her heart pounded causing blood to rush through her veins in anticipation.</p><p>They'd have to do a lot of talking.</p><p>She'd have to tell him if he was hurting her even if it was barely anything at all. Bella would have to trust that Carlisle had the self control not to crush her, break her hip, or even accidentally tear her hair out.</p><p>A caress could turn into bones breaking and Bella knew it would be much harder on him than herself if she was injured.</p><p>She trusted him though.</p><p>Dr. Carlisle Cullen was able to spend hours unphased as he performed surgery. All that blood and delicate tissue, years of hard work and discipline.</p><p>All of it would be put to the test.</p><p>Bella had complete faith they'd be fine.</p><p>Still, she understood better that it would take time and patience. Perhaps a bit more making out to get used to the rush of passion and lust until they were finally ready and comfortable to take that plunge.</p><p>Together.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0010"><h2>10. Chapter 10</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Yeah, what the hell Lauren</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>This was getting ridiculous.</p><p>Bella had packed up a few cute but casual night dresses that Alice had clearly intended for the Human girl as well as an unopened mud mask which the Vampire girl had absolutely no use for.</p><p>One hand on her hip as she stood deep inside Alice's walk in closet, with Carlisle sitting on Jasper's painting bench just outside, Bella wondered if the prescient girl wasn't really all knowing.</p><p>"She's a menace and I'm never trusting her again," Bella frowned and tried not to be disappointed at the phone she had pressed to her ear ringing through to the answering machine before she was forced to hang up. Because leaving a voice message was something she was never going to do.</p><p>She wasn't an animal.</p><p>Looking up from his medical journal, that Bella knew he could read in seconds but had decided to leisurely stroll through, Carlisle called to her,</p><p>"You know Alice means well."</p><p>"Remind me not to let her pack my luggage on our honeymoon," Bella groused as she closed her phone before sliding it into her pocket.</p><p>Jacob hadn't answered his cell when Bella had called him while waiting to be picked up after her shift, and now he still wasn't answering the landline. Not even Billy had come to the phone which was odd as hell.</p><p>"I'm sorry, I didn't know we were engaged, have you set a date?" Carlisle's tone was light and playful but Bella turned to him feeling bold,</p><p>"Not yet I'm thinking sometime after Halloween though."</p><p>There was a silence as they shared a look, and Bella smiled sweetly as she could manage while turning what had to be three shades deeper than Emmett's HUMMER.</p><p>Fortunately she was saved from whatever Carlisle was about to say after he licked his lips slowly as her phone began ringing. Quick as could be, Bella flipped it opened,</p><p>"Jacob?"</p><p>"Yeah, it's me," the boy sounded muffled as if he was under a mountain of blankets as well as a few pillows for good measure,</p><p>"Why are you calling me so much? Don't you have other friends?"</p><p>His tone came off as halfheartedly joking but there was too much misery to it for Bella to truly feel the boy was anywhere near healthy. She attempted to make contact with Carlisle and found the Vampire had turned back to pretending to read as if he wasn't listening to her conversation.</p><p>More of a symbolic gesture but it was appreciated nonetheless, "Yeah but none of them are sick.</p><p>"Leah said you were throwing up."</p><p>"I doubt she used those words exactly," Jacob chuckled tiredly and Bella shook her head at his apparently indomitable spirit,</p><p>"How are you holding up?"</p><p>"Alright, Billy keeps staring at me like he's expecting me to keel over any second but it's just the flu," Jacob assured her lightly but he sighed a bit, probably upset with the timing of it all.</p><p>"So are we rescheduling Junking? I mean, I don't know how long you usually stay sick with this sort of thing," Bella wished she did, but it was her first cold and flu season in the great pacific northwest.</p><p>Fortunately thought she had a fabulous boyfriend who insisted on administering her vaccines the moment they were available for the region.</p><p>"Nah, you and Leah have fun looking for something. I'll make sure to call you if I'm feeling up to it," he really sounded miserable so Bella pursed her lips together, wondering what she could do to help out even just a little bit.</p><p>"If you want I can make some soup and bring it down," she offered lightly, it was all she could do really. Jacob mostly needed rest and medicine but a good old chicken soup never made anyone worse.</p><p>"It's fine, I'd hate if I got you sick too," was the morose response and she couldn't really argue with that as it was probably very similar to what she'd say if a Human friend wanted to bring her something when Bella herself was ill.</p><p>"Well get some rest and I'll hopefully see you soon."</p><p>"Yep," was Jacobs only response before hanging up. Bella frowned at her phone but returned it to it's place in her pocket as she exited the walk in closet .</p><p>"I'm sorry about your friend," Carlisle's words were kind and so Bella gave him the best smile she could manage at the moment before making her way over to the man and sitting across his lap.</p><p>Carlisle immediately made room for her and placed his arms around her waist, hands on her hip to support the position. His medical journal laid to the side almost forgotten if it wasn't for his perfect memory as Bella laid her head against his shoulder.</p><p>It was strange to be so comfortable with another person still, everything was so quick yet slow and yet moving at the perfect pace that Bella couldn't describe properly.</p><p>"I love you."</p><p>"I love you too," Carlisle responded instantly and Bella felt the words wash over her as she sighed.</p><p>Bella stayed silent and tried to figure out why she had been overtaken by such sudden melancholy. Perhaps it was because everything was about to change and Jacob had gotten sick to the point that it was likely that they wouldn't get the chance to spend time together until Charlie knew.</p><p>And if Charlie knew Bella would probably have to tell her friends, because she couldn't hide it from them, it wouldn't be right.</p><p>"Do you think Jacob will still be my friend when he finds out about us?"</p><p>"You've known him how long?"</p><p>"Technically," Bella thought back to when they first met and couldn't properly recall it. Jacob had been in her life practically every summer of her childhood. Jacob had always been Jacob, never a stranger or needing introduction,</p><p>"All my life."</p><p>"Then he'll come around," Carlisle slid his hand down her thigh and squeezed it lightly as if in assurance,</p><p>"So will Charlie eventually. You'll be able to make precious memories with Jacob as well as your father, and when you become like me, they'll live forever in you. Never fading, any time you miss him you'll be able to recall every moment so long as you focus on them when you're a Newborn."</p><p>"That sounds sad," Bella whispered quietly and couldn't help but hear the tragedy in his voice as she recalled Carlisle saying he'd been friends with Ephraim Black,</p><p>"And beautiful."</p><p>"Yes it is," Carlisle replied softly and she inhaled, his scent filled her nose before washing over her as it overwhelmed all of her other senses like a warm blanket, completely wiping away her rain cloud as the cool of his marble skin radiated into her and Bella finally understood why she'd reacted that way about the scarf.</p><p>Without need for explanation Bella simply knew in her soul as she kissed his jaw lightly.</p><p>After a moment, simply basking in one another,  Bella realized it was time for her to go. There were so many things she still needed to do and it was a school night so very reluctantly she climbed out of Carlisle's arms and sighed lightly,</p><p>"I need a ride home."</p><p>"Rosalie volunteered earlier," Carlisle confessed a bit meekly as if he had hoped Bella wouldn't be too shocked by the turn of events. Really it was bound to happen again and if Bella was going to spend forever with the Cullens then it was better sooner than later.</p><p>"Alright, as long as it's not the HUMMER I'll be fine," Bella tried her best to put on a brave face as she made to grab her bag of plunder but Carlisle beat her to it with a charming grin.</p><p>"Allow me."</p><p>Permitting the show of gallantry Bella was willing to loop her arm into his and be guided to the foyer of the house. It wasn't surprising to find Rosalie already in her jeep pulling out of the garage as the pair made their way down the stairs.</p><p>Bella tried to push down her nerves and remind herself that Rosalie was just like Emmett, Edward, Alice, and Jasper. She was another one of Carlisle's children to love and learn to understand, even if Rosalie herself was reluctant to submit herself to being known.</p><p>Carlisle walked Bella out of the house and after loading her bags into the back of the vehicle he kissed his Mate softly while Bella tried not to be embarrassed as Rosalie sat silently through the scene.</p><p>"I'll see you tonight," he promised and Bella only replied with a simple, "I look forward to it."</p><p>She then climbed into the passenger seat of the jeep and buckled herself in before Rosalie pulled out of the driveway. The radio was not on and the Vampire driving didn't seem like she intended for it to be turned on for the ride.</p><p>Bella knew that with Rosalie, she couldn't pry or chase, it was a waiting game and up until that moment they'd been slowly drawing closer until colliding.</p><p>The impact was made as they exited the forest road and Rosalie spoke, her tone was calm and Bella couldn't help but think it carried a reflection to it,</p><p>"Will your dad be home?"</p><p>"He's got a few more hours, he's pulling a little over a shift and a half to cover all the call outs for cold season," Bella replied, she knew it was a bit more than Rosalie had probably expected but the Human girl couldn't help her nerves.</p><p>Which was made worse by the fact that the blonde Vampire said noting in response for the rest of the drive. Bella wondered at the odd behavior but didn't have to wait too long to find out as when they pulled up to the Swan house, as she made to get out, Rosalie too began to unload herself from the jeep.</p><p>Swallowing a bit nervously, unsure of where the whole scenario was leaving, Bella ambled her way up the drive as Rosalie followed sedately.</p><p>If it was anyone else who Bella barely knew, she'd be getting murder vibes but Rosalie was Carlisle's daughter. The Vampire girl was above that, she probably just wanted to call Bella an idiot and be on her way.</p><p>Making short work of the lock, Bella led the way into the home as she turned on the light before tossing both her backpack and her bag of pillaged items from Alice's closet onto the dining table for later. Noting immediately that Rosalie closed the door to the house and locked it for what was probably good measure.</p><p>Bella watched cautiously as the blonde folded her arms across her chest, "Alright. Ask me."</p><p>The first thing that came to Bella's mind was 'ASK WHAT?!" but the other girl clearly thought that she had some burning question on her mind so instead of saying something stupid she took a steadying breath.</p><p>Gathering her thoughts, Bella tried to form a question out of everything that had built between them,</p><p>"Do you hate Carlisle for creating you?"</p><p>Rosalie's face no longer appeared impassive and cold as it filled with something like confusion blended into surprise,</p><p>"No, he was trying to save me. What does that have to do with anything?"</p><p>"I'm as lost as you," Bella shrugged a bit not really sure how to proceed.</p><p>"I thought you were going to ask why I hated you," the other girl sighed, her arms suddenly fell limp at her sides a little bit childishly.</p><p>That was enough to have Bella confused. Looking around the dining room she wondered if Rosalie was going to say more but since she didn't the Human girl replied,</p><p>"Rosalie, you can't hate someone you don't know, that's just jealousy."</p><p>Then after a bit of consideration added, "Unless they're completely Immoral, like rapist or murderer, but I suppose their actions kind of reveal all you really need to know."</p><p>Rosalie put a hand on her hip while the other came up to cover her face before it slid down, lingering over her mouth, eventually it mirrored it's twin on the other side of her waist. The entire time the Vampire girl was sending Bella such a look that the Human girl had no idea what to say.</p><p>It wasn't a foreign one but usually Edward wore it before telling Bella she sounded like an old lady.</p><p>"What are you a horoscope?" Rosalie finally asked a bit incredulously as it was the only thing she could think to say in the face of such a response,</p><p>"You sound like my grandma and she was born in 1876."</p><p>Bella could have said a thousand things in response to that obviously condescending and a bit inflammatory comment but Rosalie wasn't Jessica. She was a Cullen and seeing as Emmett was her Mate, there had to be something else to her reaction.</p><p>"Yeah well Edward's told me the same thing except his grandma was a little older."</p><p>The silence that filled the space between them was a bit awkward as Rosalie stared at her like she was an interesting puzzle that didn't have all the pieces it claimed to.</p><p>"I don't think you hate me," Bella decided to speak, because of they were finally going to have a reasonable conversation she wasn't about to let it die,</p><p>"I think you're scared I'll be very Human and break Carlisle's heart from dying or hurt your family because of the risk my relationship with him is should it go public too soon.</p><p>"Probably, you also think I'm running full tilt towards becoming a Vampire without really considering that I won't even get to see everyone I love die before I become a creature mostly blinded by Blood Lust.</p><p>"But that's only what I've gotten from the few things you've said to me. I might be wrong."</p><p>Rosalie was staring at her a bit hotly but Bella couldn't say why. It was heavy as if the girl could see into Bella's very soul.</p><p>Jaw tense, Rosalie took a breath she didn't' need before exhaling, "When I was Human all I wanted was a Husband, a family of two maybe three little children that I'd watch play with their father on the lawn while I made lemonade in the summer.</p><p>"We'd grow old together, happy, watching our grandchildren running and laughing where their parents once did."</p><p>Bella swallowed hard at the beautiful image Rosalie painted, it sounded like a perfect life, one she'd planned in dreams a million times, a thousand versions, just to get it right.</p><p>"Sometimes, I think that if I'd survived my death, fate would have been kind enough to lead me to Emmett. Maybe I'd have gotten that life with him," Rosalie looked close to tears then and Bella wished for a moment that they would for once fall as the blond poured out her souls to a practical stranger,</p><p>"We were born the same year. Almost a thousand miles away but we still could have found each other somehow.</p><p>"We'll never know and we'll never have that because we're frozen. Forever we'll just be this. I'll never meet our children or know what it feels like to see his hair grow grey as laughter lines finally become permanent evidence of the years we spent together.</p><p>"You can still have all that. Bella you're giving up a life like the one I always dreamed of. None of us had a choice but you do and you're choosing wrong."</p><p>Tears fell, but they weren't Rosalie's.</p><p>Bella tried not to let a horrible noise of anguish escaped from her throat as she wiped away the water from her cheeks. Tears that had began overflowing for this young woman who could have had it all.</p><p>But it was easy from above wasn't it?</p><p>Emmett and Rosalie were perfect for each other, their Bond was proof of that. Except if they were Human could they have really known? And if they did find each other could they have loved until the end like that? Those were questions which also couldn't be answered.</p><p>"That sounds like a perfect life," Bella tried her best to sound kind, because Rosalie didn't need to be made to feel like her dream was foolish or dumb,</p><p>"But it would be perfect for you. Not me."</p><p>Rosalie remained silent so Bella took that as permission to keep going, "I've never wanted children. Only recently have I realized that I don't mind Carlisle having kids because you're all gown and you don't need a mother to hold your hand and teach you who to be.</p><p>"As for the rest of it.</p><p>"I can't have that life because I don't want anyone else. Carlisle is it for me. Even if I grew old with him by my side we'd still never have kids. I'd grow weak and grey while he stayed young forever, people would mistake him for my son eventually. I'd die and he'd spend the rest of his existence missing me.</p><p>"He'd live on, having waited nearly half a millennia just to love me for a few decades at most."</p><p>"Rosalie, there's no fantasy for me about him being Human, because if he was he'd have died centuries before I ever had a chance to meet him," Bella choked out a bitter laugh as she shook her head at the notion, how lucky Rosalie was that her match had been born so close to her own human life span,</p><p>"Imagine? Never knowing that someone so perfect for you walked the earth and you'd just live like that, hoping to find them but never being able to because you happened to be born in the wrong century?</p><p>"I try not to think about it. How cruel that it would have been for Carlisle to have died never knowing that one day I'd be here, feeling like my everything was wrong but living my whole life never understanding why."</p><p>Bella took a breath and tried to put what she needed to say into words, this was possibly one of the most important conversations they'd ever have and she couldn't mess it up,</p><p>"Before I met your family, I felt like an Alien. Like I was just observing the world through a fish eyed lens. Never feeling like I could just be me, unable to connect with people, and always just coasting along content with feeling like my dreams had passed by.</p><p>"And then I didn't.</p><p>"I met you all and it was like the world was filled with color. For once I understood! I could make sense of why and how and it was like suddenly I was real."</p><p>She shuddered, it was like ripping open her chest for a stranger to see confessing it all but Rosalie needed to know, needed to see. Even if Humans didn't understand how she loved them all, it didn't matter. Rosalie was going to be her family though and that was worth the mortification,</p><p>"On top of getting a family that I finally felt like I belonged to, I got the guarantee that I'd love them forever. That I'd have a husband who would never cheat on me, lie to me, or hurt me in anger because he's not Human.</p><p>"He's a Vampire. It's a gift. If we were Human love might fade away or he might find that he wanted someone else, maybe she'd be prettier more perfect, but Carlisle isn't Human.</p><p>"I am though, and that means' I'm not enough yet. I can't guarantee I'll love him like that and I want to. I want to give him that and I'll say it a million times until you believe me.</p><p>"There is noting I'll not risk for it."</p><p>"Blood Lust, murder, pain, and violence," Rosalie echoed Bella's own words from just nights before as she took in everything that had been said,</p><p>"What happens if you regret it? You're giving up everything."</p><p>"I'm gaining a lot too," Bella reminded her softly, "You should know, you're part of the plus side."</p><p>"You've started making friends," Rosalie tried again, a different angle, "Angela, Leah, Jacob, all of them are Human. Why do you hang out with them if you don't feel real with them?"</p><p>Bella sighed a bit and knew this was going to sound insane, "Just being with you isn't what makes me feel real. Knowing that Carlisle and all of your siblings have seen who I am and still want me in your family.</p><p>"That's what makes me feel real. It gave me the confidence to reach out to my friends. Sure, I'll miss them but life is full of losing people in strange ways.</p><p>"When I change, I won't regret it. Life's too short not to go all in and immortality is too limited to have regrets.</p><p>"These next five years I'm going to live them like my last because once I'm like you, I intend on focusing on every single moment to make them last forever."</p><p>"I may not agree with your decision," Rosalie swallowed and Bella wondered what emotions she needed to digest in the moment,</p><p>"But I think I'm beginning to understand you."</p><p>"Thank you for sharing your feelings, I know it was probably difficult," Bella offered hoping to pour all her real genuine gratefulness into the words,</p><p>"I think I'm starting to get you better too."</p><p>Rosalie didn't seem pleased exactly, but her face was softer than it had ever been as she said, "God, you even sound like Carlisle."</p><p>Bella smiled a bit at that, "You know, if this means we're going to start talking more, maybe you can go junking with me and Leah and Jacob next weekend."</p><p>Rosalie frowned and began making her way to the door clearly not ready for that kind of thing just yet,</p><p>"No way, take Edward or Emmett as your guard I'm not dealing with your little friends."</p><p>There was no actual heat in her words so with a shrug Bella saw Rosalie out the door, "Suite yourself! And drive safe!"</p><p>Rosalie did not deign to reply as she got back into her jeep and drove away, her tires practically screeching.</p><p>It felt like a beginning.</p><p>Something brand new was starting and Bella couldn't wait to see where it led.</p><p> </p><hr/><p> </p><p>"is there a reason Lauren keeps looking over here?" Angela asked inconspicuously as Bella was flipping through her English textbook searching for the page they'd left off on for their vocabulary questions.</p><p>"Yeah but I've decided I don't care so you shouldn't worry about it," Bella replied casually while Edward ignored the whole conversation to say,</p><p>"You just passed it."</p><p>Bella stopped her page flipping only to find that the Vampire was correct and she'd over shot her target. Edward then reached over her as he turned the few pages she needed and Bella suddenly had the urge to pat him on the head so she did,</p><p>"Thanks."</p><p>"No problem," Edward smiled and kissed her with chasteness on the temple, and that was new, but not unwarranted as she sort of maybe had thought of doing the same to Jasper or Alice when she saw them next.</p><p>Of course, she knew Angela was looking at them like they were weird. Their behavior wasn't exactly the most normal thing in the world, and honestly Bella had no idea what a Human friendship between her and Edward would even look like.</p><p>She understood why people thought they were dating but Bella never treated him different from Alice. They held hands and she leaned on them, gave hugs and apparently familial kisses were going to be a thing.</p><p>It was so soft that she could very easily imagine Carlisle kissing one of his sons on the top of the head.</p><p>Though, she wasn't about to kiss Angela, Leah, or Jacob any time soon so perhaps it was more about that than anything else.</p><p>"She's still looking over here," Angela informed them as she too began to scribble down answers on her chosen sheet of paper,</p><p>"It's getting weird."</p><p>"She's not going to come over," Edward assured, likely having read the looky loos mind and gleaned the information. Angela didn't appear fully convinced but seemed to grin and bear it as their last class of that Wednesday trundled along at a snail's pace.</p><p>Bella was happy that Edward didn't need to ask why Lauren was eyeballing them and Angela wasn't the kind of person to pry if she'd been told not to.</p><p>All in all Bella had only dealt with a few weird looks all day, mostly because Jessica was still insistent that she was a danger to society.</p><p>Carlisle was right, they hadn't done anything wrong so if Lauren tried to say something about seeing them together, well, she didn't have a leg to stand on outside of the fact that they had been seen at all.</p><p>Especially since Bella was friend with nearly all of his kids.</p><p>Soon to be all, fingers crossed and all that.</p><p>"Have you heard from Jacob?" Angela's sudden shift in conversation topic startled Bella so she had to take a moment before recalling her conversation with the boy,</p><p>"Yeah, he's got that flu. I'm supposed to call him again though so I'll tell you if he's getting better."</p><p>Angela hummed lightly as she pursed her lips, while also tapping her pencil against her cheek one, then twice, "We should take him some soup."</p><p>"Jake already vetoed that," Bella shrugged lightly, "He'll be better in no time though. It's just the standard yearly virus.</p><p>"Nothing too bad."</p><p>"Right," Angela once again didn't appear all too content with that, but Bella had told her all she could in that regard. Honestly, it must have seemed like she was trying to hide something all the time while the other girl just let it happen.</p><p>There was a bit of a cloud over their little trio for the rest of the class period and when the bell rang, Angela gave her goodbyes as she had to head over to the science building for an extra block as a teaching assistant.</p><p>As it was Wednesday, Bella had driven herself to school but Edward was keen on following her home so together they began walking out of the building chatting about various meaningless things.</p><p>"Lauren is following us and is planning on cornering you at the truck. Plan?" Edward suddenly leaned down to Bella's ear and whispered the words and she wished her life would get simpler instead of increasingly tangled.</p><p>"It's fine, I'll deal with it."</p><p>With a shrug, Edward didn't argue as they exited the main building, splitting into two separate directions as their vehicles were parked in vastly different sections of the lot.</p><p>Bella swallowed back her nerves at having to deal with someone she didn't know and was in the middle of convincing herself that she could do it, just act like herself and it would be fine. Lauren immediately came into view as Bella rounded to the drivers side of her truck and before the blond girl could say anything the brunette spoke,</p><p>"Get in the passenger side Lauren."</p><p>With that, Bella loaded herself into The Beast and popped the lock opened. For a moment it looked like Lauren wasn't actually going to do it. Then, after shaking her head the girl pulled opened the massive truck door before sliding into the beaten up leather bench.</p><p>Once the door was shut Bella started the engine and turned to look at Lauren who was about to open her mouth but was cut off as the brunette declared,</p><p>"Don't say anything, I don't care."</p><p>Lauren's face was openly shocked, then her expression morphed into a vicious sneer, "You don't care?"</p><p>"You talk to Jessica sometimes right? What has she told you about the Cullens?" Bella prompted, she had a point but Lauren was reasonably cautious as she replied,</p><p>"Nothing."</p><p>"That's right," offering a put on smile Bella grit her teeth, "Because I keep my mouth shut and I don't actually care.</p><p>"So whatever you're going to threaten me with or say to keep me from talking about the fact that I saw you working the drive thru at a burger joint isn't going to matter because I don't care.</p><p>"I have my own dreams that won't come true so what do I care about people who only know my name because they think I'm dating Edward Cullen?"</p><p> </p><p>"You expect me to believe you're not going to ask about it or tell anyone?!" Lauren was clearly out of her element and floundering a bit as she scrambled around.</p><p>"Yeah, I just told you I wasn't and offered pretty good proof," Bella shook her head a bit miffed that people were so insistent on calling her a liar.</p><p>"You won't even tell Tyler?"</p><p>"What like I'm his friend?" Bella let her dumbfounded expression really convey her feelings on the matter. People acted like they were living a goddamned soap opera but Bella was fairly sure the lives of the people in Forks were, overall, pretty ordinary.</p><p>Well...</p><p>She was boring herself, the Cullens were technically the ones with the thrilling lives.</p><p>"Honestly I'm thinking if anyone asks why you came over to me I'll say you wanted me to back off the guy cause he asked me to prom last year or something, " Bella shrugged a bit nonchalantly. It wasn't the worst lie in the world and would help whatever drama was unfolding in Lauren's life.</p><p>"Oh my God it's disgusting how perfect you are," Lauren literally sounded like she was about to throw up.</p><p>Not wanting to go down the route of just how not perfect she was, Bella asked, "So are we done? I mean, I'm not going to say anything."</p><p>"Can you make sure Dr. Cullen doesn't say anything to my mom?" Lauren bit her lip and her wide green eyes shone brightly in fear and Bella realized that she'd stumbled upon such a tangled web it was likely an entire rabbit hole.</p><p>"Um.. What does your mom do?"</p><p>Lauren's nasally voice didn't do her any favors as she sort of choked a bit, "She's a Doctor in pediatrics."</p><p>Bella almost laughed.</p><p>Almost, because the fact was Carlisle had immediately recalled Lauren's last name based on the knowledge that her dad owned the bank and not because of the fact that her mother was a colleague. Which meant he either didn't know her or had met her but didn't care to learn the woman's name for some unknown reason that Bella refused to form theories about because down that route lay insanity.</p><p>"Yeah I'll tell him, I guess," Bella had no idea what the protocol was here because Carlisle would totally listen to her, but it wasn't reasonable to think that a normal 'friend's dad' would obey that kind of request,</p><p>"I can't actually guarantee it though I mean..."</p><p>Lauren swallowed but nodded her head in understanding, "God I can't believe he saw me like that."</p><p>"I'm pretty sure he didn't care, I mean... I was in my work Uniform too," Bella reminded her easily,</p><p>"It's not exactly a scandal for a teenager to be working a minimum wage job."</p><p>"You would think that," Lauren scoffed and Bella was beginning to wonder why the hell the girl wasn't getting out of the cab,</p><p>"He's like, a thousand light years out of your league but he's single and If i just- If I can just play my cards right I could get him to look twice."</p><p>The girl's tone was actually starting to sound a bit grasping and Bella decided that she was entering the danger zone as a burning sensation began clawing it's way up her throat at the thought of Carlisle being out of her league. Honestly she was also a bit appalled at the idea of Lauren desperately chasing after a man she thought was nearly 33. Sure, Bella was actually dating him but she was aware of the truth of the matter, and there was the whole Vampire Eternal Soul Bond on top of it all. If Carlisle had actually been Edward's 33 year old Human dad that made a move on her, Bella would probably have run screaming to Charlie.</p><p>"Yeah, I don't want to have this conversation about Edward's dad in my truck," Bella informed her tightly, trying her best not to let her know exactly what she thought of the plan Lauren was apparently forming in her head.</p><p>"Right," Lauren shook her head as if she didn't believe Bella was worth the time it would take anyways. The terrified nervous creature that had reluctantly entered The Beast was becoming a kitty with claws,</p><p>"Anyways, if I hear you yapping after all, I'm going to make your life hell."</p><p>"Sounds fun," Bella offered a forced smile wishing that the girl would just leave, "But I'll take a rain check. Make sure to slam the door or else it won't latch and it'll bounce back."</p><p>Lauren shoved the truck door opened with such a force that Bella had no idea what the other girl was even thinking but decided not to care about that either as she did as she was told, slamming the door with excessive force.</p><p>As Lauren cleared the tailgate in her rush to get away Bella pressed her forehead to the steering wheel and screamed.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0011"><h2>11. Chapter 11</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I want to thank all of you for your comments and kind words. It really keeps me writing so constantly.</p><p>I also want to say that rating changed because of the new tag.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>"I've never had a sleep over before and I'm kind of panicking," Bella knew her tone was frantic as she marched around her bedroom in an attempt to calm herself. Carlisle was on speaker phone as she did her last minute tidying waiting for Angela and Leah to arrive,</p><p>"This might just be my only real one and it needs to be perfect!"</p><p>"You'll do wonderful, just have fun and be yourself," Carlisle's tone was encouraging but he clearly thought the whole thing was amusing, or heaven forbid, cute,</p><p>"It's not as if these girls are strangers Isabella."</p><p>It was Saturday, the 8th of October and Bella was nearing the stage of nerves where she was going to throw up,</p><p>"Carlisle. I have two weeks before I go fishing with Charlie on the 23rd and you know what comes after that.</p><p>"I want what could be my last weeks here to be perfect and I cant'- I'm scared."</p><p>Friday the 28th was going to be D-day. It had been decided on just the day prior when Charlie very happily informed Bella that Harry was bringing Seth fishing on the second to last Sunday of October so, though it was a tight squeeze, they decided to tell Charlie together the Friday after.</p><p>Carlisle would drive her home from school and they'd present a united front as they confessed their intentions.</p><p>It was terrifying.</p><p>"Isabella, just be sure to take plenty of pictures of it all," was his solution and she would have kissed him if he'd actually been in the room with her. The camera she'd been gifted had practically been gathering dust in her bag so Bella pulled it out and plugged it in hoping that it would have a good enough charge for the night.</p><p>"You're a life saver, I don't know what I'd do without you," Bella sighed as she finally began to calm down, at the idea of being able to take snapshots for the duration of the little party.</p><p>"I have every faith that you'd have figured it out," Carlisle was clearly smiling as he spoke and Bella imagined it. He was sitting in his study talking to her on the phone surrounded by books and paintings and Bella practically felt like she was there, standing before him as she had so many times.</p><p>"Tonight's gonna be lonely," Bella said the words and was glad they didn't feel as cheesy as she thought they would.</p><p>"It's only for one night," he replied softly, sounding for all the world like he would miss laying with her.</p><p>The sound of a car reached her ears which caused Bella to peek out her window as Leah pulled up in a champagne colored Toyota,</p><p>"Leah's here so I have to go, I love you."</p><p>"I love you too, have a good time."</p><p>Immediately Bella hung up the phone and sort of half rushed down the stairs careful not to trip. Leah was halfway to the door and by the time the dark skinned girl moved to knock, Bella took extreme unadulterated pleasure in opening the door.</p><p>"What's up? Since you got here first you can choose what kind of wings we get," Bella smiled as if she hadn't just done what was likely the creepiest thing Leah had witnessed when coming around to visit.</p><p>The other girls' eyes were a bit wary and as she entered the house slowly replied, "Cool, just get buffalo with blue ranch."</p><p>Leah looked around like she was being pranked and Bella pushed back the laugh threatening to escape her while her guest tossed her bag onto the couch,</p><p>"Sounds good. There's a deal with 2 mediums so I'm gonna get a Hawaiian and a sausage black olive is that good?"</p><p>"Yep," Leah's reply was short and Bella was glad that Angela was on her way as she dialed the number for the pizza place.</p><p>Fortunately the third girl arrived just after Bella had placed her order. She pulled the same door shenanigans with Angela which had the other girl equally as wrong-footed as Leah had been upon entering the house. Bella couldn't help but start to understand why people liked pulling pranks.</p><p>Finally, having all of them together meant they could begin so Bella pulled out a deck of cards as well as a stack of monopoly money. She gave them both a smile,</p><p>"All right, I did the math and we're all gonna start out with roughly 6 thousand dollars each. Whoever earns the most money before the pizza gets here has the privilege of picking our first movie of the night. They'll even get an extra 2 thousand next game."</p><p>"This is amazing," Angela looked as if she'd never even conceived of playing poker with monopoly money, but Leah was grinning like a cat.</p><p>"So, you both know the rules right?" Bella began dealing out the money as Leah took up shuffling the cards without prompting,</p><p>"Hell yeah, I used to kick Rachel and Rebecca's ass at this, we always played with paper clips though.</p><p>"The monopoly money is a cool idea."</p><p>"Jasper taught me with it, " Bella confessed easily and looked to the third girl who hadn't said anything,</p><p>"You play before? If you haven't we can take a couple rounds to teach you."</p><p>Angela frowned a bit at that, she seemed a little nervous and Bella knew that as a pastor's daughter the girl probably hadn't been exposed to most games that were traditionally linked to gambling.</p><p>"I know the basics but I haven't played more than a full game with my uncle," Angela disclosed a bit shyly, which had Leah shoulder checking her a bit.</p><p>"Well if you know the basics, then the best way to get better is flying by the seat of your pants," Leah replied simply as she began dealing out,</p><p>"This Omaha or Texas Holdem?"</p><p>"Whatever Angela knows," Bella replied as she slid the small piles of fake cash to each player.</p><p>"Which one is the 5 card one?" the girl in question asked a bit confused and Bella smiled at her as Leah stopped dealing, then cast Angela a bit of a look before sighing,</p><p>"Alright then this is gonna be a bit simpler than I thought."</p><p>"Angela's only played once," Bella reminded the dark skinned girl which had her shrugging noncommittally in response.</p><p>"5 Card draw is neither, it's the base game though so we're good," Bella informed Angela softly and made sure to ignore Leah's slight disappointment at the change in plans. Angela appeared a bit less nervous with the knowledge that the game would be in it's easiest incarnation.</p><p>Bella wasn't going to judge the girl, she herself had only learned poker because Jasper and Edward wanted to teach her something they were ridiculously good at. Bella had won a couple of games but Edward was skilled regardless of is inability to read her mind, while Jasper was still a huge challenge.</p><p>They'd all have to play again.</p><p>Quickly it became apparent that one of them had far more experience at hustling than the other two. Bella didn't mind though as she content to snap pictures of the two girls while Angela even snagged up the camera to take a few pictures of Leah and Bella while they all bluffed and trash talked like there was actually money on the line.</p><p>It came as no surprise then, when Leah had nearly cleaned them both out by the time the pizza delivery driver pulled up. Not that Bella hadn't put up a fine fight, it simply seemed that Leah had an excellent poker face accompanied by pure luck of the draw.</p><p>The car arriving on the curb caused Bella to immediately rise to her feet, laying her hand face down to get the door which had Leah looking at her oddly again.</p><p>"Don't tell me you're going to do it to them too."</p><p>Bella smiled and knew it had to have come across a bit mischievously as she felt like a bit of a trouble maker, "It's fun and it's harmless."</p><p>"It's straight from a horror movie," Leah replied completely serious while Angela looked on the verge of agreeing but refraining in order to be polite.</p><p>"Well it'll be a fun story for them to tell that isn't about how horrible customers are," She decided for herself despite what seemed to be the general consensus on the matter. So before the deliver guy could even raise his fist and Bella made sure to give a bright smile as she pulled the door opened.</p><p>"uh.. Swans?" The guy obviously felt awkward about the whole thing so Bella had mercy as she agreed and gave him payment as well as a tip she felt was generous.</p><p>After checking the pizza's toppings she thanked the guy and he was on his way. As soon as she brought the food in though, Leah and Angela seemed to decide it was time to eat as they began working together to clear the table.</p><p>Fortunately they were happy to all pile into the living room and start their first movie, which was the one that Leah brought.</p><p>It was cheesy flick that was more suspense than actual horror which Bella appreciated as she ate her pizza and only half payed attention while their little group mostly made fun of the cast of characters poor decisions.</p><p>The whole thing was as much fun as Bella had hoped it would be and by the time all three girls were full, Angela was putting on her own movie while their hostess consolidated the pizzas into one box.</p><p>Angela's choice was fully a suspense thriller they had all seen so conversation during it was a bit more free flowing than Leah's' pick.</p><p>"I think I saw this one before prom," Angela confessed with a bit of a frown, "God, I think Eric threw up half way through into the popcorn bucket because he actually got grossed out by the Alien Autopsy."</p><p>"What a wimp," Leah scoffed out condescendingly and while Bella agreed she had no idea what to say to that. Fortunately Leah had her covered,</p><p>"Sam and I saw this together. It was one of our last dates before he dumped me for my cousin."</p><p>Bella almost cussed as she whipped her head around to the girl at the far end of the sofa, Angela was kind enough to whisper softly, "That's really horrible."</p><p>"Yeah well," Leah's face scrunched up her anger completely justifiable with the entire situation,</p><p>"I just found out they're engaged now so good for them right?! I should be happy that my supposed best friend is getting married to such a goddamned good guy!"</p><p>The words were practically a snarl while Bella was lost at what to do. Renee never had any relationships that got so serious that they led to severe heartbreak until Phil came along, and even then the guy married her.</p><p>Charlie didn't date and Bella herself had never had a boyfriend until Carlisle and, well....</p><p>That wasn't' exactly going to help her know what to say in the particular situation she found herself in.</p><p>"I'm sorry, I have no idea what to say," Bella tried her best to be honest but in reality she felt absolutely useless,</p><p>"You didn't deserve that, nobody deserves that."</p><p>"Bella's right," Angela nodded passionately and Bella was so glad for the other girl's presence,</p><p>"Eric and I only dated for a few months and while I don't know how long you and Sam were together, getting abandoned like that for someone else feels like being stabbed in the back.</p><p>"It's awful and cruel that they'd got engaged so quickly after you guys broke up."</p><p>Leah pressed her lips together and Bella realized through the low light in the living room that the girl was crying as her shoulders shook,</p><p>"He had the nerve to say he was sorry and he just left! Like I didn't matter!"</p><p>Angela made a bold move then and Bella watched feeling a bit helpless as the other girl brought her arms around Leah like a blanket of assurance. It was akin to magic as Leah clung to Angela as the two began crying together while Bella felt like an outsider in her own home.</p><p>"You matter, we both matter Leah," Angela whispered and Bella was left in amazement at the power of understanding that was able to develop between the two girls. Leah let out a guttural scream as if she was trying to yell down the walls of the universe,</p><p>"Then why does it feel like no one else cares?! He runs around with his stupid friends and everyone acts like I'm being selfish!"</p><p>"Well they're wrong, it's normal to feel lost and abandoned," Angela assured sounding so wise it nearly made Bella smile as the girl added,</p><p>"At least, that's what my mother told me."</p><p>Uselessly Bella just sat while the movie played and Leah eventually calmed in Angela's arms, no doubt the two of them would leave closer than would have been possible otherwise.</p><p>It was a surprise then that Angela spoke up, frowning a bit, "You're really warm, are you alright?"</p><p>"God I better not be getting Jacob's stupid bug," Leah choked out but it was a humorless laugh.</p><p>Finally Bella felt that she could speak up and break through whatever bubble the two had created, "Maybe we should turn in early. I have a few night dresses and whole mud mask thing.</p><p>"It'll be refreshing and we can set up in my room for a another game of poker while the masks set."</p><p>"Yeah alright," Leah nodded as if she would have agreed to anything at the moment so the three of them did just that. It was more sedate than Bella had planned but she wondered if Leah and Angela perhaps needed this exact thing.</p><p>It was while they were playing their game of poker, all three of them in rather fancy night gowns sitting legs folded on Bella's bed that the sound of Charlie arriving home could be heard.</p><p>"I'm folding for the sake of saying hi to my dad," Bella announced as she set her cards down which was met with absolutely no resistance as she climbed off the mattress and made her way out of the room.</p><p>Carefully Bella crept down the stairs and found Charlie already munching on a slice of Hawaiian Pizza, still in uniform.</p><p>"You look like a bog monster," the man deadpanned and for what felt like the first time in hours Bella laughed.</p><p>"Thanks, we're gonna get to sleep after we wash it off," she smiled at her dad, "I just wanted to say hi and put the left overs in the fridge."</p><p>"I'm surprised you have any," Charlie mused as he took a sip of his beer he'd procured pretty quickly,</p><p>"At least you look like you're having fun."</p><p>"We are," Bella nodded as she took the box of leftover pizza and simply slid it into the fridge,</p><p>"I'm glad I did it."</p><p>"Good," the man didn't say much more but it was clear he was pleased about her making friends, probably excessively so because of Leah.</p><p>"Good," Bella replied easily as she made her way back up the stairs to the girls. In a few minutes they'd wash off their masks and Bella would set herself up on the floor while Leah and Angela agreed to share the bed because they were her guests.</p><p>As the two girls fell asleep rather quickly, Bella found herself staring at the wall unable to find comfort.</p><p>She'd gotten spoiled.</p><p>Having Carlisle there every night to lull her into dreams with his assuring presence and suddenly he wasn't available and Bella was staring at a wall wishing she could just doze. It took ages to finally become drowsy.</p><p>And when sleep finally found her, Bella thought it felt more like cloying cold hands than floating off to sea.</p><p>Suddenly she was feeling warm. Fire was licking at her flesh and Bella cringed as the heat began slashing through her flesh as it clawed at her bones. Wherever it was, she couldn't see and as Bella tried to move a force held her down with such crushing power that she panicked.</p><p>Immediately she began struggling as brimstone began piercing her heart like sharp white hot needles.Yet Bella couldn't do anything stuck pinned by an unseen force that wouldn't let up.</p><p>There was no moving, no way out, until she-</p><p>"BELLA HOLY SHIT!"</p><p>Eyes snapping open Bella realized she was screaming as Leah was on her knees by her side looking like she'd seen a ghost. Angela stood in the corner of the room with her arms wrapped around a pillow clearly terrified of what night terrors had seemed to overtake her friend.</p><p>As for Bella, everything ached. It felt like being hit by a bus and the worst part of it was her heart throbbed painfully as if it had grown 10 sizes too large as she sat burred in what should have been a comfortable nest of blankets and pillows just beside her own bed.</p><p>Suddenly Charlie's voice was calling from the hall, "I'm coming in."</p><p>It was then that her bedroom door swung opened and the man appeared in flannel pants and white t-shirt looking frazzled and disoriented,</p><p>"Is everything alright?! What's going on?"</p><p>"Bella just started screaming" Leah swallowed and shot Bella a look like she expected her to start up again,</p><p>"It scared the hell out of us."</p><p>Charlie frowned and moved toward his daughter, Leah immediately got out of the way and joined Angela in the corner of the room. Taking a knee, her father looked her over as Bella began to sit up, her whole body trembling. She didn't even know if she'd be able to speak with how raw her throat was suddenly feeling.</p><p>"Bella you have to talk to me, did you have a nightmare?"</p><p>She felt pathetic as she forced her burning throat to say, "Yeah."</p><p>How selfish and weak had Bella become that her sleep was so reliant on Carlisle that one night was enough to leave her feeling so abandoned that the Bond drew her awake so violently? It was harrowing and terrifying all at once to wonder at the implications of such a thing.</p><p>"I don't remember what it was about," Bella rasped out feeling the need to diffuse the situation, there was no way that Carlisle hadn't felt that. The only thing holding him back from running to her was no doubt the sleep over.</p><p>Charlie didn't look like he was anywhere near backing down as Bella wrapped her blanket around herself,</p><p>"I'll be fine."</p><p>"It like 4 in the morning," Leah informed her still sounding absolutely horrified by whatever had just happened,</p><p>"Are you sure?"</p><p>"Yeah," Bella took a breath and looked her father in the eye, "I'm fine. I'll be fine it was just a dream."</p><p>Not really able to do anything more, Charlie placed a comforting hand on her head before sighing,</p><p>"Alright well get some rest."</p><p>Bella nodded as her dad stood to his feet and reluctantly left the room as he cast a couple of glances back towards his daughter. Leah and Angela sort of crept back over to the bed. As Angela asked,</p><p>"Are you sure you're alright? That was really scary and I don't want you to go back to sleep just to start screaming again."</p><p>"Don't worry, I can fix it," Bella grit her teeth as she sort of scrambled to her feet like a new born deer. Once she was up she ambled to her closet and hoped that this was going to work. It didn't' take long to find what she was looking for as Carlisle's scarf still smelled a bit like him and so Bella had taken to wearing it on colder days.</p><p>She took the time to wrap it around herself so that when she breathed the lingering fragrance of his skin would fill her senses.</p><p>It must have looked strange to the others but Bella didn't want to risk more questions so she practically collapsed back onto her nest of blankets while the other two girls watched. They didn't ask any more questions though as the pair cautiously slid back under the duvet.</p><p>Fortunately Bella's theory was correct.</p><p>She didn't wake up screaming again.</p><p>Morning though?</p><p>It was awkward and stilted as the other girl tiptoed around her like she was the fragile one. As if Bella was about to break if they spoke or moved wrong. She felt hopeless and wished she wasn't so weak.</p><p>Fortunately though, they didn't say anything as they ate their eggs and pancakes. While Leah seemed ready to bail out at any moment, Angela at least kept a sympathetic air about her as if she understood something that everyone else couldn't. Charlie just sent her curious glances coated in worry but nothing more was said on the matter.</p><p>Bella had a feeling that it wouldn't be brought up again unless her sudden night terrors returned, which they wouldn't.</p><p>Carlisle would be sure of that.</p><p> </p><hr/><p> </p><p>After Charlie had left for a visit down to the Clearwater's and Bella's two friends had left for their own weekend plans, Bella found herself in her bedroom hitting call on Dr. Cullen's contact on her cellphone.</p><p>The man worked the night shift so he answered up in less that two rings and when Bella said, "I need you, can you come over?"</p><p>He had arrived within the hour.</p><p>It was surreal to feel so exhausted and lost for an entire morning only to find herself in his arms as all the tension slipped away.</p><p>Bella was content to spend her late morning trying her best to seep into his crystalline bones and as she kissed him with more force than she had ever been capable of. It was suddenly nerve wracking as Carlisle had whispered gently against her neck, hands daring to slip up her thin shirt,</p><p>"Tell me what you need Darling, I'll give you anything you need."</p><p>And Bella nearly choked from her place astride his hips, "I just need to feel you touching me."</p><p>So he had.</p><p>With shaking hands Bella had found herself under him as her fingers nervously unbuttoned his oxford while Carlisle laid open mouth kisses against her neck in a mockery of his instincts. Bella was keenly aware of her blood rushing in a torrent through her veins as she completely opened his blue button down only to slide her hands up the white t-shirt he had on underneath.</p><p>Feeling his marble flesh with her warm hands was enough to have Bella keening softly while Carlisle's own fingers played against her tummy.</p><p>It was shy and fragile as he hovered over her, his hips precariously close to being cradled between her thighs as their gentle touches and shy kisses were shared.</p><p>The chill of his skin slaked a fire inside of her as Carlisle dared to completely remove his oxford and undershirt before his own finger trembled in an attempt to remove Bella's own blouse,</p><p>"Is this alright? You have to tell me if it's alright."</p><p>"Keep going, it's perfect," Bella inhaled sharply as more of their bare flesh pressed together once her own shirt had been removed. Carlisle too, was clearly nervous as he, for the very first time, lay a gentle palm over her breast. It was like electricity was beginning to build down her spine as he touched her, even through the fabric of her bra.</p><p>The fragile caresses was enough to have Bella tossing her head back, eyes blown wide as her jaw dropped in a silent cry while Carlisle began kissing what flesh was left uncovered by her rather plain bra.</p><p>She couldn't help the sudden buck of her hips which had her grinding up against his own and in that moment Bella felt him. His desire for her clear and the action had Carlisle pushing off the mattress, practically flying across the room in an attempt to flee from her as he tightly balled his fists, jaw clenched to the point it was trembling, while he wrapped her arms around himself protectively,</p><p>"Forgive me I almost. I-"</p><p>Feeling like a brand new person, Bella rushed to her hands and knees as she sort of bustled to the edge of the bed,</p><p>"It's alright. This is enough, we don't need to do anymore if you don't want to. Just hold me."</p><p>Fear was clear in his eyes, as he swallowed down a mouthful of Venom, the same liquid that was beginning to dry stickily against her skin, "No, I want to keep going. I know it's necessary if I get accustomed to you like this, making love to you will be less of a risk."</p><p>A lopsided smile made it's way across her face, Bella knew what he meant but it was still sort of funny that the way he spoke was so telling of his anachronistic nature,</p><p>"It's only necessary huh?"</p><p>That brought a tiny grin to the corner of his mouth as Carlisle's hands unclenched, arms no longer creating a barrier between them as they fell to his sides .</p><p>Bella took him in then, all stony curves and angles carved from ice like her own personal Adonis, it was enough to get that slowly building pressure inside her belly turning inward until it ached. She felt empty in a way that could only be satisfied by him.</p><p>"C'mon, let's keep up our necessary practice," Bella tried to come off playful and teasing but the need she felt had her voice dipping in what must have sounded like a poor attempt at sultry and seductive.</p><p>Carlisle though didn't seem to mind at all as his eyes, which had been a glowing honey when he arrived, were wide and black like a wild thing before he sped over to her. With as much force as he'd apparently allow the man hitched her thighs around his hips once more as he kissed Bella until she was breathless with it.</p><p>Pressed together like that they continued to simply feel each other as he ran his hands down her thighs. Carlisle's fingers applied pressure in a way that had Bella crying out while her hands scrambled helplessly for purchase against the unyielding skin of his back.</p><p>It was intense and wonderful all at once before he suddenly released her thighs, replacing his hold on her with a grip on Bella's purple comforter as he groaned into her mouth helplessly from where they were kissing,</p><p>"How far do you want to go Bella? How much of me do you need?"</p><p>She didn't know, Bella wanted his everything but that wasn't going to happen just yet and this was only to test his control and so as her heart pounded in her ears she acquiesced, "This is good, this is all I need for now.</p><p>"I won't push you further, it's not fair."</p><p>"Bella, everything I have is yours, don't ever be afraid to ask for it," Carlisle whispered but it sounded almost desperately strangled. They'd need more time, more moments like this to be ready but Bella was happy that the time was coming soon for them to no longer need to hide it.</p><p>"Then this is what I'm asking for," She replied as she cupped his face in both of her hands, "Just this."</p><p>They didn't spend the whole day in bed together, eventually the couple had to leave the small sanctuary of Bella's bedroom. Fortunately though, Carlisle had a cottage that was in the middle of being renovated for them to peek in on the progress of.</p><p>Bella wasn't sure if it was normal to still have her skin buzzing long after they'd finished their time together but as she examined the different paint swatches, as well as the brand new flooring that was being laid, it was always there amid every other happiness Carlisle incited within her.</p><p>It carried her through the week as Angela sent encouraging smiles as if hoping that Bella would open up about what mysterious horrors had overtaken her that night of their sleepover.</p><p>As Edward grew strangely antsy over the Idea of spending a day with Leah and Jacob.</p><p>Meanwhile Bella was struggling to keep her hands to herself while Carlisle laid in her bed and would grant any desire she wanted so long as it wasn't anything beyond what amounted to foreplay without contact below the waist.</p><p>They were getting closer.</p><p>And every night left her feeling blissfully content as well as ready to panic as it brought her closer to the 29th.</p><p>She could only accept it though.</p><p>After all, it was for the best. </p><p>Keeping the Secret was one thing, but Bella didn't think she could keep telling so many unnecessary lies.</p>
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<a name="section0012"><h2>12. Chapter 12</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Fluff, fluff everywhere</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>It almost felt like casting off shackles as Bella bid farewell to Mrs. Newton when her last shift ended.</p><p>There would be no reason for her to go back as she would be going to college the following year and a job wouldn't be advisable if she wanted a social life on top of her curriculum, no matter which one she chose.</p><p>Standing outside of Newtons felt like she was exposing herself, but since the building had a wide display window as well as the fact that it faced the main street, Bella was completely out in the open for the world to see.</p><p>Which technically made her safe as she waited for Edward to arrive.</p><p>Turning her phone's sound up, on since she wasn't aloud to have the volume on during work, Bella frowned as she realized Jacob had preemptively text her.</p><p>It simply read, 'Can't make it still sick'.</p><p>Which was a bit strange since he was usually the kind who called, but if he was genuinely miserable still, Bella could understand his insistence on a short text. It would be a bit strange that the first outing looking for bikes to repair with Jacob, lacked the boy himself, but Bella was content to suck it up and try to wrangle Edward while also trying to convince Leah that she wasn't about to go off the deep end after that horrific display the weekend before.</p><p>Still, standing there outside of Newton's, something inside Bella told her to call.</p><p>Not wanting to bother Jacob, she settled on the house number as she selected the Blacks' residence on her contacts list. Bella put the phone to her ear and mentally began to ready herself for a small conversation with Billy about how his son was holding up and perhaps even a chance to actually bring the guy soup.</p><p>After 4 rings the headset was picked up and Bella waited for Billy's calm but heavy tones but instead it was Jacob's lighter carefree voice that answered,</p><p>"Do you seriously have to call every time? Paul already gave me the heads up."</p><p>"It's Bella?" She frowned at the fact that Jacob was apparently fielding calls from someone as well as a Paul. That wasn't what got her hackles raised though.</p><p>Jacob sounded for all the world recovered. No misery or rasping was evident in his voice. Not even coughing or sneezing as he awkwardly paused.</p><p>Then after a couple of beats, "Bella I thought I told you I wasn't going to make it."</p><p>"Yeah I was hoping Billy would tell me how you're holding up," Bella tried not to be angry. Jacob was a big boy and there was a chance he was just starting to feel good, only sitting back from their outing as a safety measure.</p><p>"Uh... He's not home," Jacob answered slowly as if he wasn't sure what to say and Bella closed her eyes at the weird evasive nature he was suddenly displaying,</p><p>"Alright, so how are you holding up?"</p><p>Edward pulled into the parking lot and Bella walked out from under the veranda so that she could climb into his Volvo while Jacob answered,</p><p>"Uh.. doing better, but I'm probably gonna be out for a few more days."</p><p>"That Jacob?" Edward tilted his head a bit as if he didn't recognize the voice while Bella buckled herself in.</p><p>"Yeah he's still sick."</p><p>That had her Vampire friend frowning as Jacob piped up, his tone suddenly more cold than ever, "Are you with a Cullen?"</p><p>"Yeah, Edward's going Junking with Leah and me," Bella felt even more confused as the Vampire in question drove out of the parking lot so that he could get them to the designated junk yard to meet with the third member of their group for the day,</p><p>"We're getting dinner afterwards."</p><p>"Uh-huh," Jacob sounded like his eyes were rolling all the way to the back of his head as he said the words and Bella suddenly felt a bit defensive.</p><p>"Jacob if you're sick I don't want to keep you."</p><p>If she didn't know better, Bella would have thought the boy on the other side of the phone was gritting his teeth as he informed her,</p><p>"I'm sure you don't. Just make sure your creep of a boyfriend stays away from Leah."</p><p>With that he hung up leaving her feeling like they'd just argued.</p><p>"What in the world was that?" Bella whispered and turned her gaze to Edward only to find the boy frowning with his brow scrunched a bit in consternation. It was troubling as this wasn't the first time he seemed nervously wrong footed about something that didn't actually seem that much of an issue.</p><p>And if it made Edward uncomfortable that meant there was more going on that he could say. It wasn't a conversation they could have, this talk needed to be with Carlisle. Only Bella had to figure out where to even start that conversation.</p><p>Because saying: '<em>Honey? Bears and Jacob being sick seem to make Edward nervous, is there a reason for that? No? That's reasonable</em>,' was completely off the table.</p><p>Edward, as expected said nothing about the conversation so she was forced to put it to the back of her mind. A place that wasn't exactly empty a the moment with all the worrying Bella had been doing over reuniting with Jasper and Alice as well as her sprouting relationship with Rosalie, perhaps it cold be tucked right next to the Charlie issue.</p><p>They pulled up to the scrap yard and as Edward opened Bella's door, something came over him as he grabbed took her hand happy to pull her out of the passenger side as he shut the door. Bella wasn't sure what was happening as her son then slung an arm around her shoulder almost possessively.</p><p>"Edward what's going on?"</p><p>"Nothing, let's just meet your friend and scout some bikes," he brushed off her concern which wasn't something he was supposed to do. Which meant it was probably about the thing that had him worried so it wasn't just Jacob, but Leah too.</p><p>"You're acting like a possessive boyfriend and not my future son," Bella hissed lowly so that Leah wouldn't hear from where she was waiting for them just off the front office.</p><p>Edward's focus was on Bella as he chuckled lightly, "I have no idea what you're talking about.</p><p>Bella gave him an unimpressed look but turned her attention to Leah who it seemed had seen them coming as she was now focused directly on them.</p><p>"Well I'm glad I didn't have to wait too long," Leah greeted without much fuss, "Who's this?"</p><p>"Leah Clearwater this is Edward Cullen," Bella smiled and looked between them, "Edward this is Leah."</p><p>"Cool," Leah offered a hand and Edward immediately removed his arm from Bella's shoulders and took it in a handshake.</p><p>"Hi?"</p><p>His tone was off and Bella cast him a short glance out of the side of her eye as he suddenly seemed like a kid whose mother had dropped him off in front of the wrong store at a midnight release of a book and he was calculating weather or not to run to get his copy or just count it a loss.</p><p>"You're hands are cold as hell," Leah pulled her hand out of his with a startled expression, "Do you have a thing against heaters?"</p><p>Edward shook his head while his mouth moved but he didn't' exactly seem recovered from whatever crucible he was going through, "I have bad circulation."</p><p>Leah looked at Bella for a moment as if asking if he was alright, she just shrugged before dragging him into the office for their appointment.</p><p>Bella went up to the counter and gave her name while Leah and Edward stood to the side content to wait. By the time she had the section that the Junkyard kept their recreational vehicles, they appeared to actually be talking.</p><p>Which would have been fine.</p><p>Except when she rejoined them with the paperwork Edward was saying, "We have some cousins in Alaska, maybe you could meet them sometime. I'm pretty sure they'll be coming down soon to meet Bella."</p><p>Leah looked like she was a bit weirded out by Edwards open demeanor which, to be fair, Bella knew him to be pretty shy around new people.</p><p>Edward smiled at Bella with a dash of smugness, "Leah said that your friend Jacob has been practically quarantined because he's so sick."</p><p>"How'd you get on Alaska?" Bella frowned a bit as she led the way out of the office and towards the actual yard where a worker took the papers she was given, then proceeded to lead them through the heaps of scrap to their location.</p><p>"He asked about my family, so I mentioned having a cousin who moved here because she's getting married," Leah sort of bitterly hissed and Bella realized exactly what cousin her friend was referring to.</p><p>She had no intention of touching that with a 100 foot pole so Bella trudged on, "Yeah well I'm pretty sure all of Edward's cousins are either already married or out of his league."</p><p>"Not to mention in their 20s," Edward huffed out a laugh but then stopped as if he realized exactly what he'd just implied and who he was with.</p><p>It was a wonder if the conversation could get anymore awkward when Leah said, "You and Jacob ever decide what you were looking for?"</p><p>"Probably a set of dirt bikes," Bella was happy to be back on more stable ground as the worker got them to the section and stood to the side so he could supervise their perusing.</p><p>"We don't have to get anything today, right now it's mostly going to be price checking and if we find a deal then I'll come back with Emmett and my truck tomorrow."</p><p>"So are you a mechanic too?" Edward asked a bit more curiously than he normally seemed and Bella tried to ignore his weirdness that had started with the call from Jacob.</p><p>Leah shrugged a bit as she pushed a bit of scrap metal with her boot clad foot, "I dabble, I'm not a gear head or anything."</p><p>Edward shot a glance at Bella who had no idea what the hell he was trying to tell her before he turned back to Leah, "So what do you like doing?"</p><p>"Have you ever been cliff diving?" Leah suddenly smiled a bit wryly, "It's like high diving but off a cliff."</p><p>"Yeah actually, I've done it a few times. There's this place in Ontario call the Grotto that's pretty fun."</p><p>"Well here there's a cliff off First Beach that's a real rush," Leah informed him a bit evenly as if simply imparting information before she turned to Bella,</p><p>"The three of us should do it some time. It'll be cold as hell but as long as the weather is good it's perfectly safe."</p><p>After a moment Leah added, "And by the three of us I mean the two of us and Angela."</p><p>Bella looked up from where she had been examining a particularly promising pair of bikes, "Yeah sure, Life's too short not to live a little."</p><p>And wasn't that hilarious for her to be saying?</p><p>"You're not jumping off a cliff," Edward immediately declared, his face was completely serious and if he was anyone else the tone of the words would have been forbidding. Leah actually gave him a rather disbelieving look.</p><p>"If Leah says it's safe then it's safe," Bella wasn't about to let him order her around, not even Charlie told her what to do. He didn't seem to like that at all as Bella watched him press his lips together in upset.</p><p>"You know that you're different than normal people Bella, you can't just be reckless."</p><p>"So now I'm being reckless because I want to have a bit of fun?" Bella couldn't even begin to fathom where the hell this was coming from,</p><p>"But riding a dirt bike isn't dangerous?"</p><p>"That's different, you're probably not going to go over 15 on that thing until... Well until you're older," Edward said the words and it was clear what he was trying to say but Bella hadn't realized he was so keen on her safety,</p><p>"Cliff diving can go wrong a million ways if you've never done it before, what if you land wrong or end up hitting your head?"</p><p>"None of that will be a problem if the weather's good, besides I'll go first and spot them," Leah sighed as if he was being unreasonable but Bella knew Edward was just making his attempts at being cautious. She was clumsier than most people but Bella didn't think it warranted such a level of concern.</p><p>But...</p><p>"Look, Leah and I can go cliff diving," Bella let that hang in the air as she really decided to do it then smiled, "See my future self didn't show up with her time machine so we're good."</p><p>Edward looked like he was ready to scream but since Alice hadn't called then they were fine and he didn't' have a single leg to stand on.</p><p>"Jeez," Leah sort of scooted her way past Edward and joined Bella near the more promising selection of quads and bikes.</p><p>Keeping an eye on them but still doing his own search Edward remained within his Vampiric hearing range and Bella wondered at his odd behavior while Leah whispered,</p><p>"He's a real piece of work, I can't believe you hang out with him."</p><p>"Normally he's sweet," Bella chuckled nervously at that, she sounded like a girl defending her asshole boyfriend,</p><p>"I think he's just got a lot on his mind."</p><p>Leah grunted but didn't say anything else as Bella noticed Edward sending them some of the strangest looks yet.</p><p>All in all it wasn't exactly the nightmare she imagined it might be but in between Edward asking Leah questions about her hobbies and Leah acting like he was the weirdest guy she'd ever met in her life, Bella was about to just bodily haul the Vampire out of the junkyard and tell him he wasn't allowed near Leah ever again because he was giving off Grade A absolute creep vibes.</p><p>Somehow even worse than when Bella herself had met him on that day that his eyes had been black with thirst and Edward had no doubt wanted to rip her throat out in front of everyone in Biology.</p><p>Fortunately for her Leah had her own damn car and when they said their goodbyes Bella didn't have to deal with the ride with the two of them.</p><p>Once Edward was pulling away from the junkyard Bella couldn't help but ask, "What in the world is wrong with you today?"</p><p>"I don't know!" Edward practically shouted back sounding like he was terrified that he'd been possessed by some sort of ghoul.</p><p>"Well I don't need your  gift to know that Leah thinks you're a creep," Bella sighed as she pinched the bridge of her nose,</p><p>"How can a telepath be so bad at making friends with someone?"</p><p>Edward just inhaled deeply before exhaling like he had a beating heart he was trying to keep steady. Bella did the same except it probably did her more good than her Vampire friend.</p><p>"I choked," he declared rather obviously and Bella just pat him on the shoulder as she realized he was genuinely upset at his own inability to get Leah to like him,</p><p>"Try again. It worked with me right?"</p><p>"Right," Edward didn't sound convinced but if anyone could do it, Bella knew it was him.</p><p>"How bad was it really?" she asked a bit reluctantly, hoping that Leah didn't actually think he was an irredeemable nitwit.</p><p>"it's pretty bad," he confessed and it sounded to her like it cost Edward a lot to admit that. Which was strange as he never seemed to eager to please any of her other friends. It was his prerogative though and perhaps it had to do with the Treaty the Coven had with the Tribe.</p><p>Bella stopped her mind on that for a moment.</p><p>Something niggled at her brain as she realized that the Cullens being Vampires and the Treaty were obvious facts. The first was a no brainer for her at that point and the second had been mentioned by Carlisle and Alice for sure. There was something making it seem important though but as she racked her memory it seemed she needed to tuck that thought away as well.</p><p>"Well, you're pretty great so you'll do fine on take two," Bella assured him as she reached over and mussed his perfectly coiffed hair which had the desired effect of getting him to laugh.</p><p>He smiled at her toothily and Bella didn't let up her own assuring grin as Edward returned his focus to the road, she wondered what he was thinking but let it rest.</p><p>There was a difference between being helpful and overbearing after all.</p><p> </p><hr/><p> </p><p>"What do you think a about camellias in the front garden?" Bella leaned her head against Carlisle's shoulder where they sat together on a blanket spread across the clearing in front of the cottage.</p><p>The whole area had been cleared of overgrowth, rocks, and other such eyesores. As for the building itself, the contractors were taking a day off but there was already the beginnings of the inside being stripped as the surrounding area was filled with the building supplies they would be using to remodel.</p><p>"They bloom in winter and I think it'll be nice to have color."</p><p>"Shall they be red?" Carlisle asked softly and Bella recalled that he had declared his favorite flower the Chrysanthemum.</p><p>Joy, optimism,fidelity and long life, that's what he'd said they represented so Bella turned to him and smiled,</p><p>"Alright, what do red camellias mean?"</p><p>"Love," Carlisle kissed her lightly on the forehead.</p><p>"Passion" his next press of lips was on her nose.</p><p>"Desire," he whispered and Bella took the initiative to kiss him softly as she recalled one of her favorite moments from To Kill a Mockingbird,</p><p>"And to kill them, you must pull them out from the root."</p><p>"Exactly," Carlisle smiled with his teeth at her addition, "They'll be perfect."</p><p>"I'm so happy to have you," Bella sighed as she kissed his cheek, leaning herself into his side, not seeking anything more than assurance,</p><p>"With everything that's happening I'd be going crazy if you weren't here."</p><p>"Like what? "Carlisle asked and it was so simple and casual but if anyone else had asked Bella would have shrugged. Not him though.</p><p>Carlisle had this air about him that made Bella want, not only to know every bit of his story, but to share her own,</p><p>"Jacob. He's sick but he doesn't sound like it. Edward's acting weird about it and not to mention his oddness with Leah.</p><p>"On top of that I'm not sure I'm going to be able to hold it together long enough for us to have a first date."</p><p>"Well I'm not really capable of speaking on the first three subjects," Carlisle pulled her impossibly closer to him as he laid a cheek a top her hair,</p><p>"But I have plans to take you to the Feiro Marine Life Center in Port Angeles. You did say you wanted to go with me to the aquarium, after all."</p><p>She couldn't help it as she chuckled at his solicitous nature. Bella had tossed out a random activity and here Carlisle was planning on fulfilling it,</p><p>"Oh, you have plans?"</p><p>"After we tell your father, and once Alice and Jasper have returned, you and I will be taking a day trip together," Carlisle informed her confidently and Bella couldn't argue with it as he nuzzled her hair,</p><p>"I'll get to hold your hand as we walk on the pier, and perhaps we'll even kiss over the tide pools."</p><p>"So you have plans," Bella teased lightly and Carlisle inhaled deeply, and suddenly she knew that her aroma was washing over him, filling every ounce of his focus like an emotional hug,</p><p>"Oh Isabella I have so many plans for you."</p><p>"Don't spoil them," she encouraged him with a modicum of excitement to her words, "I like surprises when they're from you."</p><p>She couldn't help it as her hand played with Polaris where it hand around her neck. The present had become a permanent piece of her daily wear and Bella found herself attached to it in a way that she'd never thought possible.</p><p>Carlisle had shifted her ideas on plenty of things though.</p><p>Marriage had always been such a huge terrifying monolith that, according to Renee, meant you were stuck. Frozen in place wherever that person had decided to keep you and it was a death sentence if you chose too hastily to tie yourself to the wrong person.</p><p>Because that's how Renee had viewed Charlie and Forks. The wrong person and the wrong place.</p><p>And Bella had believed that. Most of her life she was terrified of becoming someone's wife and ending up their mother, stuck and unable to grow.</p><p>It was kind of hilarious then, that Bella had decided that she never wanted to change, frozen forever at the age of 23 so that she could be with a man that made her soul soar.</p><p>Being Carlisle's wife didn't look so terrifying from where she stood.</p><p>But he was the right person, and wherever he was Bella knew it would be the only place she would want to be.</p><p>A white wedding didn't seem so scary in the face of becoming like him so they could have what could be thousands of years together. If he wanted it soon, Bella didn't think she'd mind that either.</p><p>What were rumors of her getting knocked up in the face of the ones they'd have already weathered together?</p><p>"You know, I think I might just start believing in miracles because of you," Bella teased which had Carlisle moving so quickly it was practically a blur as she found herself with her back flat on their blanket. He loomed over her with a smile as his hip rested next to Bella's own.</p><p>"You're behind Miss Swan, don't you know that I began believing in them the moment you agreed to have me?"</p><p>Sliding her hands around his neck Bella bit her lip as she shook her head smiling, "I'm sorry I've kept you waiting again."</p><p>Lightly, Carlisle brushed a few stray hairs from her face, "Something in you took a thousand years to get to this world, it is my honor to only have had to wait 363."</p><p>"Keep saying stuff like that and see what happens Dr. Cullen."</p><p>He kissed her lightly, still smiling as if he hadn't just told her the most saccharine thing in the whole history of the universe, and Bella hadn't loved completely.</p><p>"Haven't I warned you about calling me that while looking at me with those eyes?" Carlisle kissed her jaw and suddenly it was heavier.</p><p>"They're just my eyes," Bella argued lightly as she pressed her cheek to his own, daring to lay a light caress of her lips on his earlobe.</p><p>Carlisle pulled away, his expression remaining impossibly bright, "I know."</p><p>She couldn't help it as she laughed before he fell to the ground next to her so that they could lay shoulder to shoulder. Loosely Bella linked their fingers which Carlisle instantly obliged.</p><p>"Will it always be like this?" Bella sighed basking in his nearness, it weighed in her chest like the sun itself.</p><p>"No," Carlisle replied and it was honest so Bella appreciated it, "Love takes work, and we'll have to always ensure we continue to talk.</p><p>"Not just about the important things, but the simple ones too."</p><p>"I love you like a well tended garden," Bella sighed suddenly inspired, "With constancy and effort."</p><p>"I don't recognize that," Carlisle admitted absently and Bella closed her eyes slowly as she proudly admitted,</p><p>"Because I just made it up right now."</p><p>He inhaled sharply and Bella found herself suddenly in his arms rolling onto the grass like a child. They only stopped when they were a few yards away from their blanket and Bella was on top of him.</p><p>"Say it again," Carlisle's requested giddily like a child who had been told they could have whatever their heart desired.</p><p>Bella swallowed and realized that she had more to say as she embellished the thought in a way she had never quite managed before.</p><p>But with Carlisle, it was like breathing, to just be as she whispered,</p><p>"If it rained tomorrow or in a year from now, I'd still love you. I love you like a well tended garden or a candle on a dark night.</p><p>"With constancy and effort.</p><p>"I love your flaws, and your perfections. Wholly and completely for who you are and where you've been."</p><p>"Never stop being perfect," his begged reverently as he cupped her face with his cool broad hands. Bella leaned her head down to press against his chest and felt rather embarrassed by her attempts at poetry for him.</p><p>Carlisle had always had a way with words that he wove to express how deeply he felt. Bella never thought she'd manage it, but through the repeated mortification of showing herself to the Cullens, she'd somehow reached this.</p><p>A place where her fear and nerves didn't manage to bungle it all up.</p><p>It was what he deserved as her confession when he'd promised to love her like the sun, but he had it now.</p><p>Carlisle was her garden and she was his North Star.</p>
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<a name="section0013"><h2>13. Chapter 13</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Oh dear</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Jacob had said he'd be better in a couple of days so Bella called him the following Tuesday.</p><p>The call had gone straight to voicemail so Bella called the house hoping to get Billy. Unfortunately it rang through which led to the decision to try again later.</p><p>Later came before it was time to sleep and the same thing happened. Carlisle sat on her bed watching Bella pace as she ran a hand through her long hair, worry over her friend building. Of course, being caring and compassionate, Carlisle had held her and assured Bella that Jacob was likely simply missing her calls or had a valid reason for it.</p><p>There was something in his eyes though, as sadness which Bella couldn't place, like a silent apology and she suddenly felt like she was missing something important.</p><p>What sealed her suspicion was the fact that when morning came, he'd replaced the scarf she'd pilfered with another one which lacked tassels but had an embroidered C. It wasn't the scarf though, but the note pinned to it which simply read, <em>'All I own is yours'</em></p><p>It was not only a love note, but Carlisle was making clear that he would only ever keep something from her if it wasn't his to give and it was driving Bella insane as she tried to puzzle out what the hell she was missing.</p><p>Something inside of her told her that she knew.</p><p>But trying to remember was like going to a library, having the catalog telling you a book you want is there as well as it's location on the shelves, but once you found it the pages were blank.</p><p>Her only option was to keep calling Jacob, but both him and Billy seemed keen to dodge her attempts to reach them. They both had to be doing it, because statistically Billy would have to have picked up at some point if he wasn't in on it.</p><p>It was Thursday the 20th when Bella decided enough was enough.</p><p>She was running out of time and so after Edward dropped her off at home, Bella loaded herself into her truck and drove down to the Reservation.</p><p>As she crossed into the Quileute lands, Bella felt an odd sense of forlorness about them. It was likely she and Jacob would fall out. He clearly had gotten something in his head about being her friend and pairing that alongside her relationship with Carlisle?</p><p>It was going to be a death sentence to any time they may have spent together in the future. The clock was ticking and Bella needed to do this before time ran out and the whole game was over.</p><p>Fear was filling her heart, down her spine it dripped like a leaking faucet as Bella pulled up to the Black's house. The place was so painfully familiar and Bella wished, oh she wished that things hadn't gotten so strange.</p><p>But they had, so she steeled her resolve, not willing to give up her friendship without a fight as she trudged up to the door that was as familiar as Charlie's. Tightly she wrapped her borrowed scarf around her and knocked.</p><p>She wasn't surprised in the least when the door opened to reveal Billy Black ready to stare her down with the best of them as he said,</p><p>"OH, Bella, it's good to see you."</p><p>It rang so full of evasive double meaning she strove to calm the hell down. Bella inhaled and let Carlisle's lingering aroma do the job. Absently she felt guilty relying on him so much,</p><p>"It's good to see you too. I was hoping to check on Jake since he hasn't been returning my calls.</p><p>"Being sick for so long can't be good for him."</p><p>Billy's expression was about as far from pleased as he could get without visibly being disturbed and Bella wondered what kind of game they were playing now.</p><p>"He's been better for a few days," were the words the man in the wheel chair replied with, his tone cautious as if he was trying to see if she knew or remembered something which only served to make Bella's brain feel all tingly again as it raved against her skull to recall the information she was missing.</p><p>Billy though didn't seem even close to giving anything away, "Right now he's out with friends though, he will be for a while."</p><p>"Right," Bella nodded, accepting the artless dodge but glad that they were at least respecting her enough to confess that Jacob wasn't actually sick anymore,</p><p>"Thanks, can you tell him to call me later? Maybe when he gets back?"</p><p>"If I remember," Billy refused to promise and she just knew that was his way of evading a 'no' so that she'd be unable to argue or accuse him of lying or any other foul play.</p><p>Then, as if his sudden changing of the rules wasn't bad enough the man jutted his chin out lightly as if indicating something,</p><p>"That's a nice scarf, strange choice of letter though."</p><p>Bella decided that she wasn't going to let him do that, not when he was being so damn cryptic and secretive,</p><p>"It's borrowed."</p><p>With that she bowed her head lightly, "See you later Billy. Thanks for seeing me."</p><p>"I'll see you again no doubt," He replied in such a tone dripping with accusation that Bella had to take a deep breath in order to turn herself around and head back towards her truck.</p><p>She slid onto the beat up leather bench and pressed her forehead to the steering wheel trying to ground herself. Billy was always like that when Jacob wasn't around, hell he was like that when his son was around sometimes too. Bella wanted to scream in frustration.</p><p>It was everything.</p><p>All of it was crashing down on her and she wished things were simpler. Not for the first time regretting that she wasn't older so that half of her problems would just be non issues. If she was stronger, then she wouldn't already have her phone out preparing to call Carlisle just to tell him that she was so tired that she was helpless with it.</p><p>She was about to press call when-</p><p>
  <em> <strong>Thump Thump Thump</strong> </em>
</p><p>Bella jolted in surprise at the noise but as she turned her head to the passenger side door where it had come from, she sighed before leaning over in order to pop the lock.</p><p>Leah looked harried and a bit frantic as she hopped into truck. It was completely unexpected but the Clearwaters did live down the road so it was likely the girl had seen Bella's truck and rushed over.</p><p>"Is everything alright?" Bella frowned and the look Leah gave her was heart stopping.</p><p>"No."</p><p>Bella swallowed as her friend continued, "Can you drive us down to the beach?"</p><p>Immediately Bella turned the truck over and pulled out of the Black's driveway. The haunted look in Leah's eyes was enough to have her obeying without question. There were rabbit holes and problems that she didn't care about, whatever Leah needed to say was not one of them.</p><p>Not when Bella herself had agreed to reach out to her.</p><p>It wasn't surprising that Leah remained silent as Bella drove the way, but ever so often her passenger would glance at her and reveal her scrunched up brow of frustration.</p><p>When they pulled onto the beach, Bella popped The Beast into park and was once more startled as Leah pushed the door opened before slamming it without needing to be told. Likely from whatever emotions were overtaking her.</p><p>Following suite, Bella hopped out of the truck and tried her best not to trip and fall face first in the sand. Fortunately she did not munch it, unfortunately Bella did stumble only to be caught by Leah,</p><p>"God, you're like newborn cow."</p><p>Bella choked out a laugh at the words but thanked the girl for her help anyways. After that the two began trekking along the shore in silence. Patience was a virtue Bella had in spades for most things so she enjoyed the quiet until her companion decided to speak.</p><p>Absently they ambled until The Beast was almost a the same span as a neighborhood block away when at last Leah broke the quiet as the salty breeze whipped around them,</p><p>"What did Billy tell you?"</p><p>"That Jacob's been better for a few days and that he's out with friends," was Bella's immediate response as she tried not to heave a sigh that was beginning to build inside of her,</p><p>"Which is nice because he's been dodging my calls ever since we went junking."</p><p>"He's been hanging out with Sam," Leah informed her and the absolute poison in the words could have killed a rhino as the other girl grit her teeth,</p><p>"Before Sam and I broke up, he'd been acting weird for a while. Cut all his hair off like someone had died.</p><p>"He even got a tattoo. It was crazy but he never seemed any different when we were together. I mean, he'd get frustrated a lot but he was always a nice guy so I just thought it was stress of college applications."</p><p>Leah shook her head as if she was still lost in her maze like puzzle of memories of a happier time for herself. One where her future looked a lot less bleak,</p><p>"After he started dating Emily, he changed even more. He has this gang of local guys running around with him.</p><p>"All of them have the same goddamned tattoo and are allergic to shirts or something. I saw Jacob with them the other day and I was so pissed."</p><p>Bella swallowed down all the new information and had a bit of anger of her own starting to build up inside her at the thought of Jacob being taken in by some sort of gang. The fact that Billy seemed to be condoning it was wild and she couldn't rationalize it.</p><p>Leah wasn't done though as she barked out a bitter laugh, "The asshole told me to back the hell off and stay quiet about it, told me especially not to tell you like he could fucking boss me around!"</p><p>"Why are you telling me all this?" Bella ducked her head and felt her confusion completely overtake her,</p><p>"I mean, I appreciate it a lot, but I feel like we barely know each other and there's no reason for it."</p><p>Taking a deep breath the dark haired girl turned to look back at the truck before her brown eyes met Bella's own. Leah's soul practically shone in them, fragile and beautiful like her angular features,</p><p>"Y'know I didn't like you at first. Jake wanted to hang out and I was happy to do it but when he said you were going to be there I kept saying no.</p><p>"I thought he had a crush on you and that you were kind of leading him around like bitch."</p><p>Bella wanted to protest but Leah didn't let her, "He convinced me he wasn't actually interested in you, so I went.</p><p>"And you told that stupid basketball idiot to shut up about your friends because they were just people living in a house and I <em>got</em> you.</p><p>"You're not a bitch, you're just too nice for your own damn good to the point that you have nightmares and your dad doesn't even know why. Nightmares your scarf can apparently chase away."</p><p>She was starting to feel naked like this girl was slowly deconstructing her house of cards instead of demolishing them like Bella had thought would happen if anyone started looking too close. It was horrifying as she felt nailed there to the soft sands of the beach,</p><p>"I'm not some tortured brokenhearted girl."</p><p>"No but you know what it's like to hurt," Leah replied and it was so raw Bella wondered how old her soul really was as she kept on,</p><p>"I don't know what happened to you, but it fucking sucks doesn't it?"</p><p>Bella let that thought sink into her as she knew the Bond she shared with Carlisle only reacted so violently in her vulnerable moments because she'd put herself in danger with James, then had willingly placed herself among his family knowing that accidents could happen,</p><p>"Leah, I've chosen everything I've been through. I can't complain about the scars it leaves."</p><p>"You're pretty alright after all, Swan," Leah gave a rather weak smile and she couldn't help but think it felt a bit real, even if her tone seemed to disagree with Bella's claims.</p><p>"Well, I'm glad we're becoming friends," Bella shrugged a bit but then added, "And thanks. For telling me about Jacob, and trusting me enough to share all of that about Sam."</p><p>"We're not friends yet," Leah snorted, but she seemed eager to toss off the heavy atmosphere, "Not until I get to see you jump off a cliff."</p><p>With that Bella watched her friend turn on her heel and begin booking it towards The Beast. Immediately Bella began to follow at practically a snail's pace as she shouted after the older girl,</p><p>"It's freezing right now! I'm not waiting until spring to call you my friend Leah!"</p><p>"We'll get wet suits and do it on Saturday!" Leah called back from her place just a little further up the beach. She was clearly laughing at the idea of having Bella and Angela practically freezing to death in the ocean.</p><p>" I'm fishing with Charlie on Sunday!" Bella cried out in a groan, "I have to go to bed early on Saturday!"</p><p>"Tomorrow then!" Leah refused to back down and Bella wished for a moment she had made friends with someone a little less completely insane.</p><p>Bella then, of course, tripped and fell.</p><p> </p><hr/><p> </p><p>"I don't think this is safe," Angela said the words as Leah zipped the back of her wet suit up completely as if in rejection of her sudden realization of how high the cliff they were jumping off actually was.</p><p>Bella too, was looking down from the precipice at the waters rather easy current against the jagged rocks below,</p><p>"Charlie was right all those years ago. You are trying to kill me."</p><p>"Don't wimp out now!" Leah groaned, genuinely sounding peeved at them. Bella had to hand it to her. She'd slapped this whole thing together extremely quickly and if it wasn't for her short timeline...</p><p>Well Bella would be putting the whole thing off entirely until the weather was warmer. Then again, maybe that was Leah's intention, to get them agreeing to the mad scheme and having them cornered before their logical brains could back out.</p><p>"I really haven't' thought this through," Bella exhaled filling her cheeks and letting the air out slowly,</p><p>"God Edward was right, I'm going to bash my head in and die a virgin."</p><p>That had Leah snorting while Angela let out a very long sigh as if it was the stupidest thing she'd ever heard but was refraining from saying so.</p><p>"Who the hell are you going to lose it to?" Leah rolled her eyes having none of Angela's reservations,</p><p>"Last time I checked, you didn't even have a boyfriend."</p><p>"A girl can dream," Bella replied weakly, knowing her best bet was to be facetious because it was her own fault for bringing it up,</p><p>"Someday my Prince will come."</p><p>"Y'know I never knew you were so dramatic," Angela chuckled a bit at that and Leah didn't give Bella a chance to respond before saying,</p><p>"Who have you been hanging out with?"</p><p>The words were dripping with sarcasm but it was light and humorous so Bella shot her a halfhearted glare as she tied up her own hair into a bun,</p><p>"You're hilarious. Next time I jump off a cliff I'm not bringing you."</p><p>"This is safe right?" Angela asked for what seemed like the thousandth time as Leah let out a choked laugh containing equal exhaustion and assurance,</p><p>"<em>YES</em>. Seth and I do it all the time. Sam and his stupid friends do it too. It's like a stupid ass test of courage.</p><p>"Once you do it though, you'll want to go again, trust me."</p><p>She smiled at them and Bella figured that it made sense. Technically she was risking her health every night making out with Carlisle since he could literally turn her bones to dust if he was so inclined.</p><p>This was practically a walk in the park.</p><p>"I just hope I don't get sick," Bella decided and Leah scoffed a bit at the notion before giving them one last run down on how to jump (forwards, not straight down) how to hit the water, (feet first one hand to the side and the other over your nose) and lastly how to get back to shore (swim towards me there's a natural smooth stone ramp).</p><p>Lastly, Leah pumped a fist into the air, gave a giant whooping sound, then proceeded to run before taking a mighty leap off the cliff.</p><p>Bella felt a mild horror swimming with awe as she watched the girl go soaring, then plummeting down from impossible heights. All the while her loud whooping noise followed her down.</p><p>There was a slow moment as both she and Angela bore witness to Leah slamming feet first into the water before disappearing completely below the waves.</p><p>One.</p><p>Two.</p><p>On three Leah broke the surface and Angela released a tense breath of air while Bella realized that her jaw had dropped and needed picking up as their friend swam her way to shore in what seemed like a fairly relaxed fashion.</p><p>"I'll go next," Bella found herself declaring as Angela's head whipped around towards her, eyes bugging out like she'd just confessed all of her dirtiest sins to the other girl.</p><p>"You can't be serious!" Angela practically cried out in protest, suddenly grabbing Bella's hand as if she were a flight risk,</p><p>"I was just about to say I couldn't do this at all! This is crazy!"</p><p>"Life's too short to not run at it full tilt," Bella laughed a bit hysterically at the idea of her being the one to once again say such a thing. Renee would be having a heart attack because this certainly wasn't what the woman had meant when she told her daughter to get a hobby outside of reading.</p><p>"It's about to get a lot shorter if you do this," Angela seriously looked distressed so Bella folded their hands together completely between them.</p><p>"Angela, you're right, neither of us have to do this. We can hike back down to the truck and Leah will just tease us for being cry babies for like 3 seconds before she starts complaining about being hungry or something."</p><p>Angela swallowed hard as her hold on Bella relaxed. Once she had completely let go, Bella felt a rush of adrenaline as her heart began beating like a war drum,</p><p>"But I'm going to do it anyways."</p><p>With that she turned on her heel and before she could second guess it, cower, or shrink back, Bella ran towards the cliff and took a flying leap forwards.</p><p>It was exhilarating.</p><p>Immediately she straightened herself as best she could, feet down, Bella clenched her left hand at her side before her right clamped her nose shut.</p><p>The fall was impossibly slow yet the air rushed passed her like she'd been shot out of the barrel of a gun. For a moment she wondered how close to flying it was before her feet broke the surface of the ice cold ocean as it's gaping maw swallowed Bella whole.</p><p>It would have been worse without the wet suite, she knew, but ice cold water enveloped her and the sensation was somehow comforting as the chill began to seep into Bella's bones before she started pushing against the waters in order to bring herself up to the surface.</p><p>Something in the distance caught her eye.</p><p>Like a red flame flickering beneath the waves, a lost piece of cloth or an equally free flowing material. It was odd.</p><p>The color tickled a part of her brain that was refusing to react but suddenly the dull warmth in her chest that kept Bella steady was being infused with the icy touch of the waves surrounding her.</p><p>Immediately she tore her attention from the object, and devoted her power to resurfacing.</p><p>It was seconds before she did. Instantly Bella gasped for air as her lungs filled up. Leah was wading towards her frantically, which told Bella that her lingering contemplation underwater had lasted much longer than intended.</p><p>With as much urgency as she could manage, in hopes of soothing Leah's fears, Bella swam towards her.</p><p>Once she was in reaching distance, the dark skinned girl bodily hauled Bella out of the water as she rather frantically declared,</p><p>"I can't believe you! Do you know how scary that was?! I thought I was going to have to tell Charlie I'd killed his daughter for real!"</p><p>"Sorry," Bella chuckled regretfully as Leah helped her up the natural stone ramp, "I saw something underwater and I-</p><p>"It was weird."</p><p>"You're weird," Leah chided weakly as she finally released her, apparently too soon because Bella slipped and made to catch herself on the side of the cliff only for her left hand to hit a rather sharp edge.</p><p>"SHIT!"</p><p>Bella cried out in anger and utter contempt for her stupid habit of harming herself in the stupidest of ways. Fortunately Leah was happy to help finish hauling her to the beach.</p><p>Once they were on solid ground Bella began to examine the palm of her hand bitterly, "This is gonna need stitches,"</p><p>"Damn it!" Leah groaned but Bella already knew what to do as she closed her hand to keep the cut from tearing more before ambling towards her truck in order to grab her shirt that she'd brought over her bathing suite so that she could use it to wrap around her hand completely.</p><p>"Angela hasn't jumped yet," was the only thing Leah said as she came over to where Bella was performing rather barbaric first aide on herself.</p><p>Carlisle was going to freak out.</p><p>"She's not jumping," Bella informed her simply as the pain hadn't started up quite yet, it seemed there was still a few minutes of shock and adrenaline to burn through,</p><p>"I'm pretty sure she's hiking down."</p><p>"Will that be alright?" Leah obviously hadn't dealt with the kind of wounds Bella had before if that's what she was asking.</p><p>"No, I need to get to a Doctor or else it'll get infected. I might even lose mobility if the cut was deep enough."</p><p>Fortunately the solution presented itself in the form of the Rabbit barreling full speed down the beach road until it couldn't go any further. Jacob was flying out of the car practically shouting fire down from the heavens with the amount of rage he was bringing with him,</p><p>"What the hell do you think you're doing?!"</p><p>"We're cliff diving asshole," Leah snarled practically snapped her teeth at the boy who'd arrived like a bat out of hell.</p><p>Jacob looked at her like she was an absolute Grade A moron, "Oh shut up Leah! You should know better than to be taking Bella cliff diving!"</p><p>"I didn't know you were my mother Jacob!" Bella felt anger begin burning inside of her at his sudden arrival paired with the unnecessary attack on Leah. He'd avoided her all week and now he arrived to crash their party and yell at them like they were toddlers?! Bella wasn't going to let that happen.</p><p>The other girl was emboldened by the words as she continued Bella's train of though with, "We were just having fun and Bella was safe until she was already out of the water!"</p><p>"Well you're not having fun anymore!" Jacob hissed and actually grabbed Bella's good wrist with such a force it was shocking as she cried out,</p><p>"LET GO OF ME!"</p><p>"I'm taking you to Urgent Care!" Jacob snapped back at her like it was actually his business, his <em>right.</em></p><p>Something primal inside of Bella roared to life in the face of Jacob's impossibly hot hand gripping her wrist with a bruising force.</p><p>The pitch black, inky void that had formed inside of Bella began to rapidly consume the pulsing warmth in her chest that was the constant reminder of Carlisle until the veins of magma suddenly burnt out cold.</p><p>Instead of ice, freezing obsidian filled her bones and Bella began thrashing as she screamed, "LET GO! LET GO! LET GO!"</p><p>As if the stone silence which had begun to consume her had reached out violently towards him, Jacob released her as fear clearly etched it's way across his face while the protective but peaceful void began to retreat back into the Bond where it had originated.</p><p>"What have they done to you?" Jacob sounded almost horrified, which had her wondering what great change he had seen in her while Bella pulled herself behind Leah in an attempt to find shelter from him.</p><p>"<em>I'm</em> taking her to Urgent Care," Leah snapped out suddenly as if she hadn't been scared by the display, and Bella realized that the other girl had seen it before,</p><p>"<em>You</em> are staying here to make sure Angela get's home safe when she's done hiking down!"</p><p>Jacob's expression made it clear how displeased he was with the situation, "I've been Bella's friend longer!"</p><p>"Shut up!" Bella cried out and she still felt cold, like she'd never be warm again, as if Jacob's heat had sapped all the comforting light the Bond always provided,</p><p>"Leah's taking me! I don't want to even be near you right now!"</p><p>The devastation that crashed across Jacob's face would have mattered to her, but Bella's phone was ringing so she ran around to the driver's side of her truck to reach in and grab it, ignoring the boy's complaints while Leah screamed at him to just shut up and listen.</p><p>Not even looking at the ID Bella flipped her phone opened, "I'm alright."</p><p>"Oh thank God!" Alice's unexpected reply came like a horrifying tidal wave, "I'm so sorry! I saw you cliff diving but it wasn't until the last second that Victoria showed up!</p><p>"I have no idea how she -"</p><p>"Wait Victoria?!" Bella hissed as she tried to keep an eye on Leah and Jacob but it seemed she didn't have to as Leah came around to the driver's side where Bella was on the phone and declared,</p><p>"Get inside, the idiot is staying for Angela."</p><p>Bella climbed in, then slid over to the passenger's side as she listened to Alice rather frantically explaining," She came out of the water and was going to attack you then it all just went black! Who are you with!?"</p><p>"Leah Clearwater but Jacob Black just showed up," Bella informed her and Jacob glared from his place next to the truck as Leah turned the damn thing on.</p><p>"Tell your leech of a friend to mind her own damn business about what happens on our beaches," Jacob spat viciously.</p><p>"I heard him," Alice snapped clearly disgruntled by his interruption, "Then you're alright?"</p><p>"I'm fine," Bella replied easily, Jacobs eyes boring into her as Leah pulled away from him, heading towards the reservation,</p><p>"But I have to go, something happened and I need to call-"</p><p>Casting a glance at Leah she wished she could have driven herself, Alice got the message though and immediately hung up without saying goodbye. There would be time to talk about the fact that Bella had seen Victoria in the water later, meeting to discuss what that meant for her that the Vampire was clearly traveling through land their Coven wasn't permitted on. But since the immediate threat had passed, she had someone else to assure.</p><p>Before Bella could dial his contact, Dr. Cullen's name was blaring across her phone as it rang.</p><p>"You're popular," Leah observed clearly wary of her conversation that had just happened with Alice, as Bella hadn't said anything about being injured but assured the Vampire girl she was alright.</p><p>"Oh you have no idea," Bella sighed as she put the call through and her heart flooded with regret as she greeted,</p><p>"Hey Charlie I'm still with Leah."</p><p>There was a pause as Carlisle likely registered what she'd just said, "Isabella what in the world is happening? I felt, Bella I felt- It was like I was leaving my body It was so terrifying I didn't-"</p><p>"Oh, yeah I did manage to jump, but on the way up I cut my hand so I'll be going to the Urgent Care I think?" Bella felt like crying as she tried to comfort him, convey just how terrified she really was and how much he was needed but couldn't be had,</p><p>"Jacob showed up though, I guess he saw us. He was being a real jerk and grabbed me pretty roughly.</p><p>"It's still sore and think it might bruise."</p><p>The silence was heart breaking as Carlisle likely had to pummel himself not to act at that moment, Bella hated making him feel so helpless but was selfish enough that she couldn't hide what was happening.</p><p>"Don't go to the Urgent Care," Carlisle's tone was pleading, if he could be the man would be on his knees with the desperation he was conveying,</p><p>" Isabella please, tell your friend to meet Edward just off the reservation so he can take you to the hospital and come home to me."</p><p>"I can't," Bella actually sobbed then which had Leah looking at her like she was an alien, but she pushed through.</p><p>There was no way Charlie would have her meet Edward and get taken to the hospital. Charlie would be happy with the Urgent Care that Leah was taking her to.</p><p>"I think I might stop by the Cullens afterwards though. Ed- Edward wanted to loan me a movie."</p><p>It was inhuman, the sound Carlisle made on his side of the line, "Bella, I need you."</p><p>And what could she say to that?</p><p>"Leah take me to the edge of the reservation."</p><p>"Um? We're going to urgent care," Leah reminded her like she was an idiot and Bella hated doing it but she demanded,</p><p>"I don't want to go to urgent care I want to go to the hospital."</p><p>"No way," Leah shook her head as if she'd witnessed a murder at Forks General, "My dad would kill me if he knew I went there."</p><p>"That's why I'm asking you to take me to the edge of the Reservation, I'll text Edward and he can take me," Bella tried to remain calm with Carlisle still on the line, no doubt hearing every words and hanging onto each syllable by a thread.</p><p>"That's crazy," the other girl hissed and it was clear that she thought Bella was being delirious from blood loss or some unrealized knock to the head,</p><p>"I'm not-"</p><p>"You are," Bella demanded softly, it was like a fragile piece of her was dangling between life and death,</p><p>"Please, I need this from you. It sounds insane and I'd drive myself but my hand is busted and I know Charlie would kill me if I tried.</p><p>"But I will try regardless if you don't."</p><p>It appeared to be dawning on Leah that Bella's rabbit hole was a lot deeper than the one she'd imagined as the dark skinned girl swallowed,</p><p>"I'd say no, but you jumped off that goddamned cliff so that means we're friends."</p><p>With that Leah cussed and turned the truck around as she hit the gas and changed her course to the main road leaving the reservation.</p><p>Bella pressed the phone to her ear then, "I love you, I'll see you soon."</p><p>"I love you too," Carlisle's reply was soft like it would drift away at the slightest breeze but it was there nonetheless.</p><p>He hung up and was likely out the door like a shot or had already been loaded up in the car with Edward. Either way Bella fiddled with her phone as she pretended to put in that text.</p><p>All the while Leah was looking at her like a stranger as the other girl drove The Beast to the location that had been requested.</p><p>"You have something against the Urgent Care?" Leah finally asked as Bella snapped her phone shut.</p><p>"Not particularly," Bella replied and tried her best not to panic with the residual desperation rocking through her. It was building again, almost to the point where it had been when Jacob laid hold of her wrist.</p><p>Making a humming noise Leah left it to stew but her eyes remained questioning as they ever so often glanced towards Bella's place in the passenger seat.</p><p>Carlisle's Mercedes was parked at the invisible line which marked the edge of the Reservation and Leah frowned at the car which was no doubt unfamiliar to her,</p><p>"That's not Edwards car."</p><p>"He couldn't make it," Bella lied easily feeling her tension begin to ease away, knowing her Mate was within running distance. Leah apparently wasn't happy with that as she slammed on the breaks before reaching the line.</p><p>"Bella who the hell is in that car?"</p><p>"It's just Dr. Cullen," she assured her friend, it took every ounce of self control she had not to jump out of the truck and run to him,</p><p>"Don't worry, I'll be fine Leah."</p><p>"You said Edward, you didn't say his dad," Leah argued sounding betrayed and Bella wondered if Carlisle could hear them.</p><p>"Does it matter?" Bella asked desperately as she popped the lock on her side of the truck and Leah grabbed her upper arm eyes blazing,</p><p>"There's a difference between me leaving you injured and bleeding with a boy I know and a man I've never met!"</p><p>"Charlie knows him," Bella reminded her starting to feel desperate, hoping that he didn't get out of the vehicle, because she knew that if the Vampire did, she'd completely lose her mind. Bella could feel deep in her soul that the moment she saw Carlisle she wouldn't be able to pretend, not now,</p><p>"I trust him. I didn't think it mattered."</p><p>Leah's searched her, for what, Bella wouldn't be able to say. Whatever the other girl found it had her releasing the hold she had on Bella's arm. Something like a sigh of relief echoed inside of Bella's bones.</p><p>"I'll stop by later with Angela to bring your truck back."</p><p>"Thank you," Bella then slipped out of the cab and slammed the door. It took every ounce of self control that she possessed not to run towards Carlisle the moment her feet hit the asphalt.</p><p>It felt like days before she managed to reach the Mercedes' door. Pulling it opened, Bella slide into the passenger seat and resisted the urge to kiss him.</p><p>Leah could still see them through the windshield.</p><p>Slow torture it was, as Carlisle's face was stone cold empty, the very same as it had been the night of her birthday party. His eyes just as wide and practically lost.</p><p>"I'm here," Bella assured him and the moment she spoke, he slipped the car into drive and flipped around, away from the Treaty line before practically speeding towards his home.</p><p>His silence was nearly brutal but she knew that he likely couldn't afford to speak until they were safely ensconced within his bedroom or study, somewhere all his own.</p><p>A place secure enough that he could care for his Mate.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0014"><h2>14. Chapter 14</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Look, I'd say I'm sorry but I'm really not.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>He didn't talk as he pulled up to the house, nor did Carlisle break the silence as he opened her door before scooping his Mate out, carrying her as he had the last time she'd needed treatment.</p><p>Bella pressed herself against him and was not surprised at all that he did not vocalize his intentions before ferrying her into the house, up the stairs, past his study and into the bedroom.</p><p>Placing her down gently onto the bed, Carlisle pressed a kiss to her forehead before both of his hands gripped the left sleeve of her wet suit, then proceeded to tear through it like wet tissue paper all the way up to the place it met the neck hole.</p><p>Bella swallowed and spared a moment of regret for the thing, as well as the sheets as it seemed she was going to be dousing them in salt water and sand in much the same way she feared that Carlisle's passenger seat had been. Though the fact of it didn't appear to register to him as he got to work unwrapping the shirt from her hand.</p><p>She watch him grab his medical bag from the closet before he started cleaning her wound with small squeeze bottle of what appeared to be saline. Carlisle, being a professional, ensured that her ruined shirt caught all of the liquid.</p><p>"You need to talk to me Carlisle," Bella tried to pull him out of what she was quickly deciding had to be 'crisis mode'.</p><p>Instead of properly speaking to her about what he was feeling, the Doctor continued his laser focus by requesting, "Wiggle your fingers for me Isabella."</p><p>Sighing she complied which only had him inhaling as if relieved when all of her fingers still seemed in working order. Worshipfuly, the man laid a kiss at the pulse point of her wrist, then he spoke again, his words came out slow and heavy,</p><p>"It's deeper than it is long, You'll only need 3 sutures but understitching will be necessary."</p><p>Bella had suspected then that he wouldn't be talking about anything but her treatment until he was finished with the task. Perhaps it was some deep-seated instinct to get her back in working order, as Alice had shut down over Jasper that fateful night.</p><p>So Bella let him work.</p><p>Carlisle injected as small amount of anesthesia, ostensibly the same as the time prior, once it had taken effect the Doctor did indeed institute understitching, before finally securing three sutures into her skin.</p><p>Surprisingly though, he did not wrap it immediately. Instead the Vampire pulled out a loose plastic glove that was closer to a what a lunch lady would wear than a Doctor before he proceeded to slide it onto her hand. Having accomplished that,  Carlisle secured the base of the glove closed with tape.</p><p>"You'll need to shower before I wrap it. Make sure not to use your hand at all."</p><p>Bella frowned as she looked at her torn wet suit, then to her injured hand, before finally examining the sleeve that was still intact. His tearing of the material which covered her left arm made sense as she wouldn't be able to take off the skin tight suit without causing further harm but, Bella wasn't sure how she'd go about getting the rest of it off with one hand.</p><p>"Can, you get the rest of it off?" she requested a bit shyly as she knew it amounted to asking for him to rip her clothes off of her. Absently the part of her which was longing for him, needing the man to cover her with his own body and press their flesh together until she felt whole again, filed that thought away for the future.</p><p>"Of course Darling," Carlisle leaned forwards as if to kiss her but stopped, suddenly nervous. Bella had no such reserves as she closed the gap between them while his chilled fingers tore through her other sleeve with preciseness. Then, Carlisle deepened the kiss before he yanked on the front of her suit and tore it in half up the chest.</p><p>Bella gasped lightly against him as her Mate peeled the fabric away from her body leaving only the rubber like pants. Feeling him so close, freeing her of the constraining fabric had Bella at last starting to warm against the impossible panic from before.</p><p>"You have to shower Isabella," he said the words and she wondered who they were for as Bella felt his long fingers begin to slide against her stomach in a caress that could quickly get out of control. All she had left on was her bikini she'd worn beneath the protective gear and everything within Bella was screaming to just pull him closer instead.</p><p>"When I get out, will you hold me?"</p><p>"Yes," Carlisle replied like a vow so she pressed her uninjured hand against his stone like chest.</p><p>"Then you have to get off me and let me clean up."</p><p>With that he removed himself from her, and Bella could see that it took a good portion of his self control to do it.</p><p>The shower she took was mechanical as it served only to free her from the sand and salt on her skin. It proved difficult to wash her hair evenly, but with a bit of determination, Bella figured it out eventually. Agitation was humming through her still, the Bond unsatisfied by the little contact they'd had to sate it.</p><p>She tried to focus on getting done but as she turned off the water, Bella realized that her right arm was no longer just sore, the skin had become a mottled angry red with the edges beginning to darken slightly.</p><p>Jacob's hand clearly imprinted on her flesh from how fiercely he'd grabbed onto her.</p><p>That primal thing in her raged as the void surged up once more as she realized that Jacob Black had marked her violently without reason or cause. As if her skin was his to mark and claim in a way only Carlisle's passion should ever be permitted.</p><p>"Isabella," Carlisle's voice was at the door, "Darling, please say something."</p><p>"Jacob bruised me pretty badly," she couldn't help that it came out as a sob, finally the water ceased pouring over her and Bella tried to gather herself and not lose it all over when she was safe and away from the situation. There was a rumble coming from the other side of the door and Bella realized Carlisle was growling.</p><p>In an attempt not to torture him further, she grabbed the towel that had been set out, wrapped it around her as quickly as she could manage,</p><p>"Come in here Carlisle."</p><p>Immediately the door opened and the Vampire began checking her over, gently his hands examined the portion of her forearm which had been damaged. His growling still echoing against the tiles, despite the low tones of it.</p><p>After he'd looked his fill at the injury, the man scooped her up again before speeding her over to the bed and depositing her lightly. Absently she noted the sheets had been changed.</p><p>It was a bit of a jarring experience to have Carlisle practically buzzing round the way he was. Normally his speed and strength were only displayed when necessary or in times which he was trying to impress her. So having the man plopping her on the bed then in the next breath wrapping her hand with a bandage, was quite an experience.</p><p>Once he'd finished though, Carlisle sat himself next to her as he tilted his head. Gently he reached across her body so that his fingers brushed her bruised wrist. They blazed an icy trail across it as if attempting to mourn the injury.</p><p>At last, he spoke about something that wasn't pressing or immediate, "I don't want you to be alone with him again when you're on the Reservation."</p><p>Something that felt like a whole lemon lodged in Bella's throat at the softly spoken demand, "Carlisle, you can't tell me what to do. Sure, Jacob was acting like a jerk but that doesn't change the fact that he's still my friend."</p><p>It was almost terrifying as the broad hand which had been caressing her injury suddenly appeared to gently cradled her neck and cheek with reverence while his thumb pressed lightly at her bottom lip. Carlisle swallowed hard and there was something like Armageddon in his eyes,</p><p>"He hurt you, and you were somewhere I could not reach."</p><p>His other hand was then brought to mirror the action of it's twin, Carlisle's voice was pleading, "I'm just a man Isabella. I'm just a man. "</p><p>"You can't tell me not to see my friends," she argued softly, trying to help him see how unreasonable that was, but Carlisle shook his head as if it was costing him everything,</p><p>"I only ask you not be alone with him on the Reservation. Anywhere else I can reach you, I can find you.</p><p>"Our treaty forbids me going to you on Quileute Land."</p><p>Jacob had scared her. The boy had terrified Bella to the point that she was screaming and cowering behind Leah. The request from that point of view was reasonable and Carlisle had only asked for her not to be alone with him. </p><p>That was probably wise regardless of the Treaty seeing as Jacob had caused her harm.</p><p>"Alright, but only because he hurt me," Bella acquiesced after her consideration of it. Her Mate relaxed then, as he fell silent before offering her a kunik, his eyes practically hypnotized.</p><p>She felt a bit odd only wearing a towel but Carlisle didn't attempt anything untoward as his hands slid down from her neck and face, to her shoulders. He kissed her jaw lightly and Bella swallowed while the man began to lay open mouth kisses on her jugular. He left cool traces of Venom across Bella's skin which had muscles below her stomach churning tightly in growing anticipation.</p><p>"Carlisle."</p><p>"Hmmmm?"</p><p>"I have to get dressed."</p><p>"I want you," Carlisle whispered against her flesh desperately and Bella sighed at the though of having him right then and there. The Bond was only just becoming comfortable again as he laid his affection into her skin, but making love to him?</p><p>"We can't," Bella felt strange for being the one to protest as she had been on the cusp of begging for it on her knees just after her birthday. This was obviously brought on by the absolute terror he must have experienced through the Bond,</p><p>"You know we can't. I'd be taking advantage of you."</p><p>A chuckle ghosted against her neck as Carlisle's voice vibrated softly while he continued to lay kisses on her,</p><p>"Forgive me, but the idea of you taking advantage of me, while possible, took me off guard. "</p><p>Bella sighed at that but Carlisle very lightly added, "You're right of course. It will be satisfying enough to hold you."</p><p>"I still need to get dressed."</p><p>Later, much later, when Bella was in a borrowed set of clothes from Alice's closet and she was laying on top of Carlisle in his bed, did her mind finally right itself and realize that she'd effectively abandoned Jacob and Angela to the mercies of Victoria.</p><p>Bella was beginning to understand what Carlisle had meant when he claimed that if it all came down on the wire, he would always choose her. It would never actually be a conscious decision, because in the moment it would seem like the only thing to do.</p><p>To let everything else fall away until only what Carlisle needed mattered.</p><p>It was dangerous and sweet.</p><p>Fortunately though, Bella could call her friend from the comfort of her boyfriend's arms.</p><p>Angela had very carefully informed Bella that Jacob took the initiative as he hiked up to meet her, which would have been startling if Leah hadn't called and informed her about the accident.</p><p>It was a relief to know that neither Angela or Jacob were hurt and had safely made it down to find Leah with The Beast.</p><p>Something about the story seemed off though, like Angela was editing herself carefully and wasn't that interesting? For the girl to speak to Jacob only to begin sounding a bit like Billy when informing her that all was well.</p><p>Bella pushed it aside and told herself to be glad that they were alright. Carlisle's company could be enjoyed without feeling guilty over what had transpired.</p><p>After hanging up the phone, she contented herself at another attempt to completely melt into him. A task that Carlisle seemed to enjoy as it involved sparse kisses and whispers in the dark.</p><p>In those moments they did not have to worry about Victoria, Jacob, Jasper and Alice's return, or even the fear of their first time together breaking her somehow. They could let all of that go, just for a short while as they simple allowed themselves the comfort brought by laying in the arms of someone you loved.</p><p> </p><hr/><p><br/>Sunday morning Bella woke up, bright, early, and surprisingly refreshed to a note that read <em>'You are nothing short of everything'</em>. Which did miles towards making her giddy with enthusiasm.</p><p>Nothing was going to spoil this day for Bella, she was determined and hungry with it as she dressed into her oldest pair of jeans and a worn long sleeve after having cleaned her stitches and re-wrapped her hand.</p><p>Charlie had been absolutely livid about the injury but then Bella informed him it had simply come about from a fall, he didn't look very impressed but allowed it to pass.</p><p>She was terrified of letting him see the bruise though. It was gnarly and blue but very clearly a hand print.</p><p>So a long sleeve to cover it was in order which was just as well, Bella had plenty from covering up her bite scar.</p><p>That morning consisted of a simple breakfast for them, as she made a scramble before packing a set of sandwiches in the cooler Charlie had set out on the counter filled with water and a few sodas. Together the Swans buzzed around as they readied for their rather highly anticipated fishing excursion.</p><p>After both of them had finished eating, Bella let Charlie wash the dishes as she headed upstairs in order to grab her camera and wallet from her bag, then she made sure to secure her phone into her pocket.</p><p>Pulling her hair back into a ponytail in the same manner she used to for work, Bella didn't think she looked to bad. Her only worry for the day would be to make sure she didn't get her stitches wet. Even then, it was October so nobody was swimming.</p><p>By the time she was ready, Bella found Charlie fully equipped and prepared to go with his gear in the kitchen.</p><p>She felt like she was 10 again, ready to go fishing with her dad, so Bella broke out her camera, "Alright, I'm getting a picture of us before we leave."</p><p>Charlie wore his surprise on his sleeve as he replied, "You're really excited about this."</p><p>"That's why you gave me the camera right? So we can make memories together?," Bella asked brightly.</p><p>And yeah.</p><p>Perhaps that was what she was feeling. 5 years was a tiny drop in the bucket to what her life might be, and if the Cullens had taught her one thing it was that she shouldn't waste time.</p><p>Stretching out her uninjured hand, Bella took a picture of her and Charlie together and was happy to find it half way decent. There would be plenty more by the end of the day so she didn't need to go through them quite yet.</p><p>It wasn't long before Harry Clearwater's truck pulled up and Bella was happy to grab the tackle box as Charlie carried the rest of his gear out the door.</p><p>"Look who's being converted," Charlie called out almost proudly as Bella waved lightly at Harry.</p><p>Seth, who was in the passenger side of his father's truck gaped openly, "Jake's not gonna believe this!"</p><p>Bella shook her head at the boy but only smiled as she loaded Charlie's tackle box into the truck before turning to younger boy,</p><p>"It's good to see you too Seth."</p><p>While they were putting the gear into Harry's truck bed, the Swans would be taking Charlie's cruiser out to the lake. It was just how they did it. Mostly it was convenience, and they didn't need a designated driver as there wouldn't be beer because Charlie was a better example than that. Besides they usually saved drinking for afterwards.</p><p>Bella slid into the passenger side of Charlie's cruiser and reminded herself that this was for her father whom she loved and if it made him happy that was all that mattered.</p><p>"Y'know, if you backed out now I wouldn't be offended," Charlie observed and it was only half teasing but it came a cross like he was giving her an out.</p><p>Sticking her tongue into the side of her cheek Bella huffed out a weak laugh, "Well the jokes on you, I've been wanting to go fishing with you since my hiking trip with the Cullens."</p><p>Just as when she first proposed the outing, Charlie was practically gobsmacked by the things she was saying and Bella was happy that she had that truth to prove just how serious she was about this.</p><p>"Alright then," the man gave a nod and they were pulling out of the drive, following Harry down to the lake.</p><p>As they drove Bella looked out at the forest road and wondered at it, Alice would have texted her if she'd had a Vision, that paired with the fact that the prescient Vampire had said that the attack wouldn't happen until after her and Jasper's return... Well, it did a lot to sooth her worries that had kicked up.</p><p>"You won't need to change your thing while we're out there right?" Charlie suddenly asked, his eyes still on the road as well as Harry's truck. Bella took a moment to realize he was referring to her stitches,</p><p>"Nope. Once every 12 hours so I won't have to do it until we get home. Can't get them wet though."</p><p>"Right," he nodded a bit but apparently wasn't content with the quiet just yet, "Any idea when they'll be coming out?"</p><p>"Dr. Cullen said 4-7 weeks because the skin is so delicate," Bella informed him a bit lightly, she tried not to get lost in the memory of exactly what they'd been doing when Carlisle had informed her of that fact.</p><p>Charlie took the information in stride as he sighed, "That seems like a while but I guess it makes sense."</p><p>Silence overtook the ride and Bella pulled out her phone on a whim and sent off a text to Carlisle which only read,</p><p>'Gone fishing.'</p><p>Charlie said nothing about her fiddling with her phone, not even when Bella got a response of,</p><p>'Don't fall in.'</p><p>Bella pressed her lips together in an attempt to suppress a smile, 'I didn't realize I was texting Emmett'</p><p>'Just concerned about the stitches,' was the pragmatic response so she obviously had to reply,</p><p>'And not about me? Rude.'</p><p>Bella had to cover her mouth as Carlisle was apparently not having her lip since he sent, 'I thought you were supposed to be spending time with Charlie today.'</p><p>'Touche,' was the only thing she could say to that as she closed her phone. Charlie was sort of eyeballing her but said nothing. It wasn't as if he could see who she was texting, but Bella thought better of doing it again.</p><p>After a while they did reach the lake and Bella was happy to get a chance to stretch her legs as their little quartet made their way to the docks. The boat they took out apparently belonged to a man they all referred to as Old Quil. Bella had never met him but apparently his name was Quil, he was old, and he had a boat he lent out as well as a grandson also called Quil. Which perhaps said enough.</p><p>"Bella," Harry got her attention as they were loading the small motor boat up with gear, and she wasn't too surprised as he hadn't gotten to say hello quite yet,</p><p>"It's good to see you here with us, and safe."</p><p>
  <em>Chills.</em>
</p><p>They ran down her spine like an electric current as the words washed over her in a tidal wave of unchallenged certainty that Harry Clearwater knew. He knew everything Billy knew and somehow felt the need to make her aware of it too.</p><p>"Yeah, I mean, I thought it would be nice to spend some time with Charlie," Bella smiled tightly, realizing she was going to have to tread lightly around him in the same way she always needed to around Billy.</p><p>"You're not afraid of worms right Bella?" Seth suddenly asked as he saddled up next to his dad with a skip in his step. It seemed his zest for life was not a one time thing and more of a constant.</p><p>"No way," she replied to him easily, happy for the distraction from Harry who knew too much,</p><p>"You know when I was 10 Jacob dared me to eat one."</p><p>"No!" Seth's jaw dropped in a mix of disgust, awe, and horror, "Did you do it?!"</p><p>"No way," Bella snorted and proceeded to climb into the boat just after Charlie did the same. Seth and Harry followed suite in not time at all, once they confirmed each member of their little quartet was secure, Charlie detached the boat from the dock before setting off into the lake.</p><p>The small fishing boat's motor was sufficient for maneuvering and Bella was happy that it wasn't the kind made for speed. Leisurely was the pace that their little group moved across the lake until Harry and Charlie quit bickering about where to cast their lines.</p><p>Seth kept covering his snickers while Bella tried her best not to smile indulgently at them and their strange method of communicating through short answers and strait forward 'no that's a bad ideas'</p><p>Finally as they settled on a place to set anchor, Bella was happy to watch Charlie tie his bait and cast off without too much fuss. Mostly she stared out on the water and wondered what lurked beneath.</p><p>"You know I'm glad to finally see where all the fish I cook is coming from," Bella observed a bit plainly but there was a still some humor in it.</p><p>Seth's grin was practically glowing, "Yeah, It gets less impressive the more you come out, but the wait makes you appreciate fish fry more."</p><p>Charlie hummed at that, which Bella couldn't help but take advantage of as she pulled out her camera from her hoodie pocket in order to snap a shot of both him and Harry with their poles cast.</p><p>"Oh! Can I see?" Seth leaned a bit over to her and Bella handed him the camera with a modicum of caution.</p><p>It was still brand new after all, and they were sort of surrounded by water, "Yeah just, it was birthday gift from my dad, if you drop it in the lake ..."</p><p>"You're gonna follow it," Charlie finished and Bella actually huffed out a genuine laugh as they shared a small look of understanding.</p><p>It was nice.</p><p>Seth appeared duly nervous as he took the camera with care before taking a picture of himself and Harry, then snapping a shot of what was likely Bella and Charlie as he seemed to lean back ever so slightly in order to get their side of the boat.</p><p>With his wiggles out, Seth happily handed the thing back without incident.</p><p>After a few fish had been caught Bella decided it was worth it to open up a little more as she asked Harry,</p><p>"So, when should I expect the next batch of Fish Fry? Because dad wouldn't stop talking about it this morning."</p><p>"Hey!" Charlie was smiling as he called out his complaint, Bella took an irreverent snapshot of him with her camera in response. Which just had Seth laughing.</p><p>"I'm not sure," Harry sounded a bit morose over the question and answer, "Maybe if I just make a batch for you two Sue will stop giving me grief."</p><p>"You still refusing to go get that checked?" Charlie frowned a bit and Bella realized she'd accidentally set off a land mine as her dad sighed,</p><p>"High Cholesterol is no joke Harry, Forks General is just right there too. It'll take less than a day to get a prescription from Dr. Gerandy."</p><p>"I'm not going to Fork General and I'm not driving all the way to Seattle," Harry informed him as if that was the end of it.</p><p>"I thought you guys had an Urgent Care near the Reservation," Bella mused as she sort of glanced at her hand which was on the mend. Leah would have taken her there if the Bond hadn't been in such a state,</p><p>"Can't you just have a Doctor there check it out?"</p><p>"They don't have the qualifications," Charlie informed her a bit more bitingly than she expected from him, as if this was an age old argument,</p><p>"The Urgent care is good for a cold or a stitch up but not anything too specialized."</p><p>"I'm still young," Harry cast off all the worry over him, "My Kung Fu is still strong and I could wrestle a bear if I wanted.</p><p>"Sue just likes to worry too much."</p><p> Charlie just hummed ambivalently before he dropped it though and Bella was glad as she slipped her camera back into her pocket. She hadn't realized they were still arguing about the whole thing regarding her favorite Doctor.</p><p>Jacob had made it seem like Harry and Billy had decided to let it rest but apparently Charlie's worry over his friends was endless so that particular argument wasn't going to actually die any time soon.</p><p>Great.</p><p>All in all fishing wasn't the slow torture she thought it might be.</p><p>Yes, it had great lulls of waiting and nothingness, but knowing her being around to keep Seth entertained had Charlie's eyes practically shimmering every time she glanced at him, well it was worth it.</p><p>Bella managed to get a few more shots, several of them were of Harry and Charlie showing off their fish or comparing the sizes of their catches.</p><p>By the time they were loading up to head home, Bella was tired from being out all day and socializing, but it wasn't the kind that made her want to lock herself in her room forever.</p><p>So, as she got home, she placed her camera on the table and went up to shower as well as clean her stitches.</p><p>Once they were wrapped up and Bella was in her comfortable home clothes, she had enough energy to go downstairs and start heating up leftovers. Partly, Bella wished she could start cleaning the fish in the cooler the way Charlie had taught her, but that was out of the question for obvious reasons.</p><p>She lost herself to the mindless work and was happy to reflect on the time they'd spent together.</p><p>The sound of footsteps came down the stairs so Bella began talking, "I had a lot of fun, I wouldn't mind doing it again."</p><p>"Really?" Charlie still sounded like he didn't quite believe it.</p><p>"Yeah really," Bella continued stirring a pot of vegetables she was heating "I took a lot of pictures. Camera's on the table so maybe later we could go through them together."</p><p>Charlie didn't answer and since Bella was certain he hadn't left she looked up from her task and turned her focus to him. She found her father there by the dining table with her camera in his hands as if he'd been absently flipping through the snapshots of the day but he was frozen.</p><p>Staring at the viewfinder like his entire world was crashing down around him.</p><p>And suddenly Bella remembered that, with everything going on, she'd never done anything with the pictures from her birthday party.</p>
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<a name="section0015"><h2>15. Chapter 15</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>It took 4 versions of this chapter before I could even tolerate it</p><p>I've taken too long already though and in the immortal words of Jake Parker: "Finished Not Perfect" I'd rather have a thousand finished projects than a single half done perfect one.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Death itself could have been passing over as silence filled the entire house. Bella swallowed hard and attempted not to give anything away,</p><p>"Is something the matter?"</p><p>Charlie pulled his eyes from the camera in his hands, his expression bordering on thunderous as he turned the display towards Bella, revealing to her exactly what he'd seen,</p><p>"It depends on why you took this picture."</p><p>She'd known of course, that Charlie had somehow circled around or flipped to it. A picture not even Bella had looked at, as Alice was the one who'd taken the thing in a moment of inspiration. Perhaps Bella was afraid of it all this time. The damned photo belonged on a list labeled something ridiculous like 'Top Ten Pictures Taken Before a Disaster' or another equally inane title.</p><p>But now, she took the time to stare at it, Bella could see the problem went beyond the fact that Carlisle Cullen was feeding a freshly 18 year old Bella Swan cake.</p><p>Carlisle's expression was clear. His eyes were wide in wonder while his smile remained a bit shy, though his lips were slightly parted in an unmistakable passionate longing at Bella's own flushed enjoyment of the sweet treat.</p><p>It was damning.</p><p>"Dad," Bella tried to remain calm as everything inside of her was screaming to run, get out, abort the mission. This wasn't right! This was wrong! They'd had a plan and it had just been blown to kingdom come because she was a complete idiot,</p><p>"I know that it looks bad but-"</p><p>"How long?" Charlie cut her off, clearly realizing that she wasn't going to deny the facts so he was pushing forwards. Demanding information,</p><p>"How long has this been going on?"</p><p>And suddenly she was exhausted.</p><p>All the fight just drained from her body as a choicless, hopeless, tiredness consumed every sinew and bone of her body.</p><p>There was too many unnecessary lies that had been told purely because she wasn't good enough yet. Too many half truths and brushed aside concerns because Bella was trying her best to conceal a love that she knew down in her gut that Charlie would immediately forbid.</p><p>"Since my birthday," Bella closed her eyes and let the storm come as she almost whispered the horrible half truth of it. Charlie was quiet as if he hadn't expected the raw honest confession. When Bella opened her eyes slowly he was staring at her as if she was a stranger.</p><p>His face pale as he messily placed the camera onto the table while a hand ran through Charlie's dark brown hair.</p><p>"Carlisle is a good man," she forced the words out through a burning throat which was growing tight with sorrow for the pain she was putting her father through, anger for ruining the plans they'd laid, and bitterness that this had to even be an issue,</p><p>"I love him."</p><p>Charlie inhaled deeply as if he was trying to calm himself, "Bella he's a grown man. He's 33 years old and if he'd started young he could nearly be your father.</p><p>"<em>That Man</em> has no business doing anything with you but beyond making sure you don't keep his kids out past bedtime!"</p><p>"I know," Bella choked out a sob as she agreed. He was right, she had no business loving Carlisle, and it was almost depraved that she didn't even care,</p><p>"But that doesn't change the fact that I love him."</p><p>Charlie looked like he was going to be sick, as he covered his mouth in abject horror, "I should have known! I didn't want to think the worst, so now it's my fault! I tried to rationalize it by saying that he was a good man, with kids, who was just taking care of you like a second father!</p><p>"I even told myself that you'd never be taken in by smooth talk and a handsome face. "</p><p>It was Bella's turn to begin feeling her stomach churning with nausea as it became clear that Charlie was starting to spiral in his violent shock of disbelief and betrayal,</p><p>"The <em>worst</em> part of it all is that I <em>defended</em> him! Billy and Harry are always going on about how he's no good, and I told them they were wrong! That he was a loving father who cared about the people in our community more than money! Bella I <em>fought</em> for him!</p><p>"It turns out that me trusting him means I've been looking the other way while a grown man took advantage of my baby girl!"</p><p>"He's not!" Bella argued feeling all her love for the Cullens bubbling forth into a passion she couldn't even begin to understand the depths of, all while the Bond flared to life as she felt it spread through her body like veins of gold in a slumbering mine,</p><p>"He's not taking advantage of me! Dad please just listen! We're not sleeping together! He's too much of a gentleman to do that before we've been on a real date!"</p><p>Charlie wasn't a man who yelled. The only time Bella had ever heard him raise his voice was during a sports game or if he'd cut himself while cleaning fish. Even then it was less angry and more put upon distress.</p><p>But, in that moment, something within her father's eyes ignited with righteous fury as he actually thundered like a electricity which lit up the mountains in a storm,</p><p>"Bella you don't have to be dating to be having sex! He's a grown man who's been flirting with you since you met him! I thought he was just being nice, but all those times? The winking, the smiles, and even that damn scarf!</p><p>"He's practically been grooming you while I just looked the other way!"</p><p>Bella ducked her head no knowing what to say as his words pierced her through the heart like super heated knife, "Dad we're not having sex! Carlisle respects me too much to be sneaking around behind your back."</p><p>"Alright, say I believe that he hasn't- hasn't-" Charlie stuttered violently as he was clearly losing his train of thought, unwilling to let it trek too deep down that path as he shook his head bitterly,</p><p>"But that doesn't mean he hasn't pressured you into other things! Bella, when was the first time he convinced you it would be alright to kiss him?! Because this picture is from your birthday and he'd already gotten you willing to let him do this!"</p><p>The hardest part of it all was the fact that Bella knew she'd have to lie. <em>Again</em>.</p><p>Her relationship with Carlisle had been a peculiar one from the start.</p><p>From a Human standpoint it was awful and clearly someone was being taken advantage of, either he was a pervert who preyed on teen girls or Bella was a money grubbing gold digger who'd managed to convince a guy it would be alright to break a few moral codes for an exhilarating affair.</p><p>No one would ever believe that he loved her the way he did, how soft, pure, and true it was.</p><p>A sweet blasphemy.</p><p>So she told her truth, one that Charlie may find appalling but the only thing she could manage in the wake of all the choiceless lies she'd already told.</p><p>"I'm the one who chased him, I told him how I felt and Carlisle didn't feel comfortable about it because I had only just turned 18," Bella swallowed down the rest of it, not willing to risk the true facts of it escaping. They had kissed before then but it hardly quantified in the narrative as Carlisle hadn't dared touch her again for the sake of decency and respect,</p><p>"So I waited a little while before telling him I wanted to be with him and Carlisle told me that he couldn't do that because it would be disrespectful to me if we were seeing each other while lying to you.</p><p>"We were planning on telling you on Friday. You weren't supposed to find out like this."</p><p>Guilt filled her lungs as Bella drowned in it, Carlisle had been right. She was grateful, so blissfully grateful that they had waited to have sex. There was no way she could proudly claim that while trying to convince her father that the love of her life wasn't taking advantage of her.</p><p>Tears began burning in her eyes as Bella fought down the horrific fear and desperate agony, this was a real fight and if she didn't' win it, she might just lose what she had with Charlie forever,</p><p>"Dad, please understand. Carlisle is a good person."</p><p>She wished that she could tell him the truth. That Bella was aware that Carlisle was just a man. How she understood that better than most as she'd felt him tremble, heard him growl and beg. A strong man, yes, but he had his weaknesses and a breaking point.</p><p>Charlie blinked at her, the muscle in his jaw twitched as he clearly tried to process the words, her excuses and half baked lies served up and garnished with sprigs of truth sprinkled about.</p><p>"Bella, I know you think you like him but if Dr. Cullen was really a good man he'd have told me immediately what was going on," Charlie said the words and it was like they were being engraved into stone,</p><p>"I don't want you seeing him anymore. His kids either, now that I know what's been going on it's clear to me they've been in on this whole damn thing."</p><p>She could not hold back the sob that wracked through her body as frenzied tears scorched their way down her face.</p><p>Almost mundanely she turned off all the burners on the stove with much more petulant aggression than required before turning back to Charlie and trying to muster up her boldness. The strength to hurt this man she loved for the sake of her own selfish dreams of being the person to make Carlisle smile forever.</p><p>"I don't need your permission."</p><p>Without warning, Bella felt that void embrace her and it was like her soul was soaring as the inky tendrils of it surged in her veins in lieu of blood.</p><p>"Yes you do," Charlie was starting to lose color as he likely realized exactly what she was about to say,</p><p>"Because I'm your father and I'm not letting him, or any of his kids in this house again. Bella I'm trying to protect you! I know you think I'm being mean, but honey, no grown man twice your age is ever going to be good for you.</p><p>"You're still a kid. A real man's better than that. I wouldn't be surprised if you weren't the first girl he's done this to."</p><p>"I know you're not angry at me," Bella let the easy current take her, and she willingly sunk to the bottom of the inkwell,</p><p>"You're angry at him for taking advantage, but you're wrong. He loves me, just as much as I love him. I know how that sounds, but it's the truth."</p><p>With that Bella let it guide her as it moved her legs out of the kitchen and up the stairs sedately. Of course Charlie came after her, his tone confused and bordering frantic,</p><p>"Bella, what are you doing?"</p><p>She ignored him as the eerie alien calm swallowed all of her panic, fear, and tears while she pulled out her phone, hitting dial on Carlisle's number just before swiftly barging into her bedroom and locking the door behind her. Leaving Charlie in the hall panicked.</p><p>Putting the phone on speaker Bella laid it on the bed so she could grab her big bag. Then she began stuffing as many changes of warm clothes she could manage into it, her boots several coats. </p><p>Alaska was cold.</p><p>Two rings later, Charlie was demanding she come back out to talk, and Carlisle answered his phone frantically,</p><p>"Isabella what's going on?! Where are you?!"</p><p>"I'm home," Bella felt her throat was still tight and prepared for another round of broken whimpering despite the calm which had swallowed her whole,</p><p>"But I need you to come get me because we're going to Alaska early."</p><p>"Are you talking to him?!?" Charlie cried desperately from his place locked out in the hall.</p><p>"I'm already on my way," Carlisle assured her,"be packed and ready, And remember that I love you."</p><p>"I love you too," Bella practically bleated before she shut the phone and shoved her medications for her hand into the hastily packed bag.</p><p>Carlisle's scarf quickly found a home around her neck before she shouldered the bag and took a deep breath as she opened the door.</p><p>Shock.</p><p>It hit her like a brick to find Charlie sitting in the hallway next to the stairs, all red faced and crying. He was a man who's emotions always murmured like a wispy creek and there he was, like a child weeping bitterly.</p><p>His eyes registered what he was seeing. Bella with her bag looking ready to leave and he bolted to his feet like hell itself was on his heels.</p><p>"Bella, you are not leaving this house, you promised you were staying her with me. That you wouldn't leave again," Charlie's voice was breaking as he stood there in his own home looking like he'd taken a wrong turn in the woods and needed help finding the way back to familiar territory.</p><p>The man was so near desperate the knife in Bella's chest twisted.</p><p>"It's not forever," Bella informed him and she didn't recognize her own voice, it was strange and calm in a way she never thought it would be in the situation she found herself in,</p><p>"And I promised I wouldn't leave Forks. I can't- I'm going to Alaska for a couple of days with Carlisle to help pick up Alice and Jasper.</p><p>"When I get back we'll talk again. Carlisle will come and we'll sort it all out alright?"</p><p>"No it's not alright! You can't go to Alaska!" Charlie was desperate as he reached out to grab the bag but Bella pulled  away from him before his hand could get a grip on the strap over her shoulder, unfortunately it meant he laid hold of her right arm.</p><p>Bella hissed as Charlie accidentally squeezed her injury before letting go with such violence it was almost as if the'd been scorched.</p><p>"I barely grabbed you," he whispered silently horrified, as if he suspected something sinister, and it made her blood boil when Charlie pleaded, "Bella show me your arm."</p><p>She grit her teeth as she shook her head, "It doesn't have anything to do with this conversation."</p><p>Bella swallowed hard and hated herself in that moment. Why couldn't she have been enough? Why did Carlisle finding her have to be riddled with so much hurt?</p><p>"I'm leaving for a few days and you can't stop me. I'm 18."</p><p>It was funny, she'd never sounded so much like a petulant child in her life. Wasn't that the way of things though? Poets could write that they would burn and salt the earth for the sake of love and the world swooned, but as soon as a young person said it they were being dramatic and didn't know what love <em>really</em> looked like. Even to call out such a double standard was viewed as immature.</p><p>Bella realized in that moment that she could say anything, tell her father about how Carlisle was her garden and how he'd chosen her to be his true north but, because of her age, nothing would change his mind.</p><p>Not ever.</p><p>"Bella, Bells. Please don't do this," Charlie actually choked out the words while unshed tears began to shimmer across his muddy brown eyes,</p><p>"Men like him don't let girls come back home."</p><p>Bella wondered distantly at the fact that normally she'd stay. She'd wrap her arms around Charlie and apologize for scaring him, only to beg that he not forbid her from being with Carlisle forever.</p><p>She would swallow back her own dreams just for a little while for Charlie's happiness. What kind of selfish beast had she become that such a thing didn't appeal to her?</p><p>Like a monster she embraced that viscous obsidian ink as it extinguished any inclination for her to recant the determination which was coursing through her.</p><p>"He'll bring me back," Bella tried her best to convey the truth of how he loved her but Charlie didn't appear moved at all, not even as she assured him,</p><p>"Carlisle is my boyfriend, not a serial killer. He'd never hurt me or try and keep me from you."</p><p>She took a breath before making an attempt to push past Charlie, her father didn't' resist, but he wasn't about to back down as he chased her down the stairs.</p><p>"Think about what you're doing! This is crazy! Think about your mother, how am I supposed to tell her I let this happen?!"</p><p>"I'll call her," Bella would have stuttered but she was beyond being overwhelmed by all the anger and upset that was rapidly filtering and renewing itself until it completely filled her.</p><p>Finally, Bella pushed her way out the front door.</p><p>Relief flooded through her with the welcome replenishing of liquid heat as Carlisle's car pulled up to the curb, just as he'd promised. The man himself flying out of the driver's seat appearing for all the world like an avenging angel as he met Bella halfway up the lawn.</p><p>Cool slender fingers took gently hold of her shoulders before sliding down her arms only to cup her elbows as Carlisle laid a soft kiss on her forehead. Bella realized that he was still dressed for work as the strong scent of antiseptic wash filled her nose instead of his normal comforting aroma.</p><p>"I'm fine," Bella assured him and tried not to hack out a half laugh, half sob as she realized his name badge was still dangling from his neck.</p><p>"Bella don't do this," Charlie demanded fiercely as he halted just behind her, it broke Bella's heart to hear it.</p><p>"Chief Swan the neighbors are watching," Carlisle informed her father succinctly and Bella realized that he was bordering on crisis mode as her Mate pulled her towards himself a bit more ferociously than he would under more normal circumstance.</p><p>"I don't give a damn!" Charlie hissed like a wounded wild thing, "That's my daughter you're trying to take from me Cullen! She's my baby and I won't let you just leave with her!"</p><p>Bella turned herself slightly in Carlisle's arms, sure not to pull away as she once again attempted to reason with her father, "I need him dad. It sounds insane and I know you think I'm just a stupid teenager whose being brainwashed, but I love Carlisle so much that I can't leave him.</p><p>"So as much as I want to live with you until I leave for college, I can't stay if you don't at least try to understand how I feel."</p><p>"You don't need him Bella, and I'll never be able to look you in the eye again knowing I've failed you because you think so," Charlie replied, his voice mournful, twisting that knife in her chest.</p><p>"Let's go Carlisle," Bella pressed her good hand into his marble like form and he, of course, obeyed, ushering Bella to the car as Charlie begged and pleaded for her to change her mind.</p><p>To stay.</p><p>Carlisle shut the passenger door and seemed to just turn to stone as Bella began to sob once more as she sat in the front seat of his Mercedes, her tears brand new flowing hotly with the grief of what she'd just done. She could hear Charlie's tone turn violent and dripping with vitriol as he spat his outrage toward Dr. Cullen.</p><p>Bella covered her mouth in anguish as her Mate joined her in the vehicle, completely ignoring her father, before pulling away from the curb.</p><p>Abandoning the man who'd loved and took Bella in when she had lost her place with Renee.</p><p>"All will be well," Carlisle whispered to her gently as he carefully cupped her bandaged hand over the console in his own,</p><p>"He will no doubt calm down, and regret you leaving. When we return, he'll be more willing to discuss the situation."</p><p>"I just wish I was already enough, that being with you wouldn't hurt him so much," Bella sobbed knowing all her insecurities were pouring out and being laid bare. Carlisle kissed her injured hand.</p><p>It was his turn to beg and plead," Tell me you don't truly think that? Isabella you are more than enough. Everything you are is far too great for a man such as me."</p><p>"If i was really enough I'd be older. Then I wouldn't have to hurt Charlie, we could just get married and runaway. You could change me without all the worry, all the trouble!" Bella was crying in earnest, her deepest fears and worries overtaking her completely,</p><p>"I'd be a Vampire and you wouldn't' have to worry about breaking me every time I take my shirt off!"</p><p>"If you were older my family would have had to leave Forks , a place we all consider our favorite home, earlier than planed," Carlisle protested with such conviction it had Bella pausing as she stared up at him in surprise,</p><p>"Isabella if you were older I would have bitten first and fallen in love later to have you. Your mother and father would have never gotten 5 years to make memories with you.</p><p>"I would have begun our immortal life together mourning what Human life you could have lived if you had simply been a few years younger. Wishing that I could have given you more time!"</p><p>It rocked Bella to her very core to hear such a confession. That Carlisle was truly grateful the she was so much younger.</p><p>That she had time.</p><p>Time that the Culllens all wished they'd had.</p><p>She felt almost stupid then, but only almost.</p><p>Feeling a little bit childish, Bella wiped away her tears and strove to see from his perspective. It was all so simple and easy. Carlisle thought that Bella was lucky that she even had the chance to mend her relationship with Charlie instead of simply dying and never getting a goodbye.</p><p>Of course she could see where Carlisle was coming from. Part of Bella regretted feeling so useless, but the fact was there were still plenty of issues that came with her age of 18 compared to Carlisle's perceived 33.</p><p>She didn't know why, but Bella found herself sobbing again, it was a horrible desperate thing, "I love you so much. Sometimes it terrifies me."</p><p>"And you will always have me, " Carlisle assured her, the words were like balm to her soul as the harrowing intensity of the event of the night washed away with them.</p><p>When they pulled up to the house, Bella's heart felt drained of everything it had ever contained. It couldn't even offer up surprise as Rosalie stormed out of the house and up to Bella once the Human girl was out of the car.</p><p>Bella had no clue what to do but the Blonde Vampire girl apparently had a plan as she wrapped her arms around the brunette in a rather surprisingly fierce hug.</p><p>Sparing a confused glance to Carlisle, the man only smiled softly at the pair of girls as he hauled Bella's bag out of his backseat.</p><p>"Thank you?" Bella tried a bit confused but grateful for the comfort before Rosalie pulled away, her expression a bit unsure,</p><p>"Alice isn't here so I figured you wouldn't mind me filling in for the emergency."</p><p>She couldn't help that she started crying again which had Rosalie stroking her hair lightly before Carlisle handed the bag off to an Emmett who arrived outside between Bella's sobs.</p><p>Once free of his burden, Carlisle pulled Bella away from Rosalie and into a hug which she fell into like a skipping stone tossed into a river. It was desperate as she gripped the man's shirt while her tears ruined it completely. Slowly he guided her to the house and up the stairs down the now familiar path towards his room.</p><p>She didn't even care that she was hungry, Bella just wanted to be alone and it seemed he agreed as he shut the door behind them.</p><p>Caressing her face Carlisle kissed her forehead with such fragility Bella almost felt made of glass as something else took over her senses and she found herself reaching out trying to pry open his shirt with her one good hand.</p><p>"No no no," Carlisle gently batted her fingers away as he lightly tsked, "None of that, not tonight. "</p><p>"I need to feel you," Bella begged and she knew it was ugly, she was a mess from crying and feeling like the world was ending until her entire being had been hollowed out. Still though, tears kept coming,</p><p>"Please."</p><p>Cupping her face with both hands Carlisle pressed his forehead to her's as he once more denied her, "I don't want to take advantage of you, especially after what has only just occurred with your father.</p><p>"My conscience can't take that."</p><p>"I don't want-" Bella cut herself off and tried to really find the perfect words, it had been awhile since she'd felt so lost for them in his presence,</p><p>"I just need to feel you. You don't need to touch me."</p><p>"Oh," the syllable was a long sigh filled with something like desire as Carlisle quickly began taking off his own shirt in such a rapid fashion Bella had to push away her desire and lust to make way for her urgent need just to feel.</p><p>Once he was free and bare chested, Bella reached to the buckle of his pants, "All of you. please I need-"</p><p>He obeyed.</p><p>That was how Carlisle, wearing only his cotton briefs, began undressing her with such gentle worship it made Bella's knees feel weak. Her skin buzzed until she was finally in her underthings, the moment Bella found herself freed of the unnecessary constrictions, she pressed herself against the ice cold stone of her Mate. Her own chest pressing just below his while her head found a cradle against his shoulder and neck.</p><p>Eager hands found Bella's thighs as Carlisle, like it was nothing, lifted her fully off the ground, wrapping her legs around his hips only for him to fall carefully backwards onto the bed where Bella continued to just embrace him.</p><p>There were no rushed kisses or exploring hands.</p><p>Just two figures pressing into each other as one's chill absorbed the heat of the other.</p><p>Bella closed her eyes and focused on the feel of his stone smooth skin, the scent of it, and texture against her own bare Human flesh. Slowly she inhaled and let the aroma that was still a bit too coated in antiseptic, wash over her. It was enough though.</p><p>It was enough.</p><p>Later she would wake to find him slowly stroking her sides all the way down to her thighs, no intent, just an action born from his basking in the privilege to do so. Bella would kiss his jaw and neck as she asked for the dinner she'd missed only to be brought a nearly cold burger and fries that Rosalie had apparently run out for.</p><p>In the morning they would head for Alaska.</p><p>Alaska which had it's own issues of Jasper's likely ongoing self recrimination and Alice's likely nerves about what had almost happened on the beach at La Push. The Denali who Bella had never met but were going to be her family just as the Cullens were.</p><p>Would they like her? Would they be like Rosalie and believe she was wasted on a Vampire, even one as good as Carlisle? Bella hoped that they approved of her, even if it was just a casual acceptance of the circumstances at hand.</p><p>One thing she did know for certain was that they couldn't stay in Forks, they had to get away for just a little while.</p><p>Charlie would likely come banging down their door otherwise, and Bella didn't know what to say or do if she should face him so quickly after their argument.</p><p>There was definite terror.</p><p>What was to come?</p><p>She didn't know.</p><p>Carlisle didn't seem to know either, so Bella took that as a sign that it was alright.</p><p>For once, she let it rest.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0016"><h2>16. Chapter 16</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Renee is a bad mother but WE BEEN KNEW</p><p>Also, I will repeat that communication is the sexiest, even sexier than actual sex. I should rate this E for how sexy it is.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>It was just going to be the two of them.</p><p>Rosalie, Emmett, and Edward would be staying behind to keep their territory both claimed and patrolled for Victoria. According to Edward they would be pretending the house was closed though so any prying eyes or ears would believe all the Cullens had fled together.</p><p>A united front.</p><p>So as Bella sat in the passenger seat of the Mercedes staring at her mother's contact in her phone, she was practically shaking. Carlisle, of course, had his hand resting over her's in a way that wouldn't jostle her injury but Bella could barely keep herself calm as she breathed.</p><p>There was still an aching hollow exhaustion from the night before which loomed and Bella was glad for it, otherwise she'd likely be on the verge of hyperventilating. At this point she was too exhausted to do much more than shudder and keep doing breathing exercises.</p><p>The drive to the Seattle Airport wasn't nearly as long as the one Bella had been on with Alice and Jasper to Phoenix earlier that year.</p><p>"I'm supposed to call Renee and I have no idea what to even say," Bella closed her eyes and tried to ignore the light ambient noise of the radio as it's music played to stave off most of the boredom,</p><p>"But I don't want to put it off, this is too important."</p><p>She had a feeling that Charlie was going to be expecting a call from his ex-wife post haste regarding the situation of <em>'What to Do With Bella and her 30 Year old Boyfriend'</em>.</p><p>"If it's privacy you need, I'm sure pulling over at the next rest stop will be no trouble at all," Carlisle offered easily, and Bella wished she could borrow his confidence, at least his ability to remain calm with such a harrowing call looming on the horizon.</p><p>"It's not about privacy, it's about having to tell my mom that I'm running away with Edward's dad to Alaska to get away from Charlie's disapproval over us dating," Bella blurted a bit indelicately, but Carlisle didn't laugh, he simply continued looking thoughtful over the matter. A fact which she was glad for.</p><p>He always seemed to know the difference between when she was actually trying to be funny and when her awkwardness just took the wheel.</p><p>"May I suggest simply telling her plainly?" Carlisle didn't seem to be joking, and that was excellent, because Bella wasn't laughing. Not even as he continued with,</p><p>"No matter what you say she'll be shocked I'm sure, so why not simply go the least complex route?"</p><p>"Just tear it off like a band aid," Bella sighed as she actually pressed call on Renee's number. She'd gone cliff diving and let a Vampire put his mouth on her neck, there were much scarier things than a horribly awkward phone call to her mother.</p><p>"You're calling her now?" Carlisle actually looked surprised and Bella gave him a bit of a glare as she brought the phone to her ear,</p><p>"It's now or never and I'm not taking a plane ride to Alaska panicking over it!"</p><p>He tilted his head in acquiescence and Bella let out a particularly deep breath as the phone continued to ring. Normally she called Renee on Wednesdays after school.</p><p>Their conversation always seemed the same. Bella would ask after Renee and Phil, her mother would go on a bit about how hard it was doing chores again and how she along with her still rather new Husband enjoyed their nights on the town. She'd then turn the conversation to Bella to ask about boys and school.</p><p>Bella would brush off the first and go on a bit too long about the second to distract from the fact that she never talked about boys at all anymore. Then Bella would do a spiel on all the things she's been getting up to with her friends.</p><p>Mostly the Cullens but also Jacob, now Angela and Leah as well.</p><p>So Bella pinched her eyes shut and clenched her teeth as if bracing for a car crash while her mother took forever to answer. Because Renee was always misplacing her damn phone.</p><p>Just before the voicemail kicked in Renee's voice put Bella out of her initial misery as it cheerily chimed, "Bella! You can't be off of school yet, are you ditching?"</p><p>Her tone was dripping with mischief as if it was the best thing in the world that her daughter was on a slippery slope towards delinquency. Bella swallowed hard and forced out a chuckle,</p><p>"You could say that. I mean, technically I'll be ditching all week because I'm in a car headed to Seattle so that I can go see Alice in Alaska."</p><p>"Honey, you didn't tell me Alice was in Alaska," Renee's tone was clearly perturbed and Bella pushed her bandaged hand gently into Carlisle's for strength. This was her fault. She never shared anything important with her mom anymore.</p><p>"Yeah, her aunt is dying," Bella rattled off the lie trying to get back on track, "But that's not the only reason I'm calling."</p><p>"Well yeah! Obviously Charlie letting you go to Alaska alone is HUGE!" Renee scoffed as if she was blown away by her ex-husband's sudden laid back and 'cool' attitude.</p><p>It was time to confess, so Bella looked at Carlisle, he was mostly focused on the road, but he spared a golden glance her way which was finished off with a warm slight grin of encouragement. Bolstered, Bella let it all out.</p><p>"He's not," Bella bit her lip and reminded herself that she was proud of her relationship with Carlisle, and that Renee was just the kind of careless spirit who would allow it so long as Bella showed no shame,</p><p>"I'm going with Carlisle, he promised to take me when he picked Alice and Jasper up. I would have told you but we decided to go early because Charlie found out we were dating and didn't have the best reaction."</p><p>It felt nasty, to practically be putting it all out like she was trying to completely scandalize her mother all the way to Timbuktu and back again, but Bella wasn't going to shrink back. Not after the night before, not ever.</p><p>"Dating Alice?!" Renee of course purposefully misunderstood because she didn't want to face what Bella was actually saying so the girl took another breath before reiterating more plainly,</p><p>"No mom, I'm dating Carlisle."</p><p>There was a long stretch of silence.</p><p>Then, "And you're on a road trip alone with him."</p><p>"To pick up Alice and Jasper."</p><p>"Dr. Cullen."</p><p>"Yes."</p><p>Renee let out a long harsh breath, "Oh, Bella. Honey no. He's-"</p><p>"Edward's father, twice my age, and older than Phil?" Bella cut her off trying her best to come off facetious but there was a bitterness there that couldn't be shaken from her vicious stand of defiance that she could not afford to waver in,</p><p>"Blond maybe? Was that what you were going to say?"</p><p>Carlisle snorted, Bella gave him a very unimpressed glance before focusing back on her mother.</p><p>"Bella. Before I say anything at all. I want you to tell me one thing about him that you like that isn't about sex or his looks," Renee's tone was far more grave than Bella had ever heard her and she realized, for the first time, the woman was trying to step into the shoes of a mother.</p><p>It was ironic really.</p><p>"I like that he hates Jane Eyre even though it's one of my favorite books, mostly because our arguments about the Brontes are my favorite," Bella informed her plainly without shame or fear,</p><p>"And I'm still a virgin, thanks for the faith in my ability to keep my head with an older guy."</p><p>It was rude but Bella hadn't kept her pants on for so long just for her parents to have such absolute distrust in her ability to keep her hands to herself.</p><p>Honestly.</p><p>Renee didn't laugh, she didn't yell either so that was good. What her mother did do was say, "Bella, I have seen you grow up and become this amazing young woman. You're smart, generous, and you kind of have your head too far into books.</p><p>"I've trusted you with so much, but honey...</p><p>" I can't approve of this. Not without seeing the two of you together and knowing he's not just with you because you're so young."</p><p>"He's not mom," Bella tried to assure her but knew that she couldn't really do much better. She took a another glance at Carlisle and he gave her a wink which actually managed to make her laugh.</p><p>"Bella?"</p><p>"Sorry, Carlisle is just making faces at me," Bella shook her head a bit as her mother grew silent again over the line.</p><p>"He makes you laugh then?"</p><p>"Yeah."</p><p>"When are you getting back from Alaska?" Renee's tone was suddenly all business and Bella had a sneaking feeling what this was about which had terror sort of seizing at her heart as she replied,</p><p>"Probably Friday or Saturday. It just depends on Alice and Jasper."</p><p>Bella's theory was confirmed when Renee hummed for a moment then with determination informed her,</p><p>"Phil won't be free until thanksgiving, but I'm going to see if I can come up earlier than that. This is important and I'm willing to drag you back to Jacksonville if I don't approve."</p><p>Refraining from arguing Bella grit her teeth at the idea that she could be dragged anywhere she didn't want to be taken. Especially by a woman who had practically just whimsically accepted the idea of her barely legal daughter dating a man older than her own husband,</p><p>"Just keep me updated. I want to make sure my schedule is free and, since Carlisle likes to switch his shifts depending on the hospitals needs, he'll need to know so he can get off."</p><p>Renee agreed and after a stilted conversation where he mother was clearly uncomfortable Bella was able to say her goodbyes before hanging up.</p><p>The numbness from the day before hadn't left her, not when they reached the airport, and not when Carlisle kissed her for God and everybody to see as they boarded the plane.</p><p>Bella figured she just needed more rest so she slept the entire flight.</p><p>When she woke up she still wasn't better.</p><p>If anything she almost felt worse as if her soul had never returned from that blackness, even though her body had.</p><p>There was much more important things to focus on though as Carlisle loaded their luggage in the rental car. Bella couldn't afford to cry again about Charlie, worry about Jacob, be angry at Renee's blase devil may care attitude, and everything else when she had to be strong for Jasper.</p><p>Carlisle kept sending her worried glances but Bella just tried to offer a smile. He offered an easy expression back and she felt her soul sink ever deeper into that abyss.</p><p>It didn't make sense.</p><p>Every time she'd felt lost and heavy to the point of going mad, Carlisle's touch, smile, and voice was always enough to help her through it. Comfort that staved off her worries for a while, in his arms she could forget just a little bit.</p><p>So why wasn't she feeling better? Being with him like this as he drove for miles across what seemed like an endless stretch of snow covered tundra and mountains lining the horizon. It should be making her feel free.</p><p>And yet, Bella was beginning to feel trapped.</p><p>The more she tried to push it all back for later, the more her mind reminded her of Charlie crying in the hallway begging her not to leave because she'd promised.</p><p>She'd promised.</p><p>Why hadn't Bella kept her promise?</p><p>Bella could see a house approaching in the distance and reminded herself to be strong but couldn't in the face of the reminder of how much Charlie had loved her so passionately and bravely.</p><p>How he, a man who had only spent a few months of his life with her had been ready to rain down hell because he was scared for her safety. All while Bella's own mother, who was supposed to have raised her for the other 98% of her life had practically just tossed her hands up as if to say 'oh well'.</p><p>Her shoulders began quaking as all the tears she'd thought dried up began flowing again as the guilt of it ate her alive. How was she supposed to survive? How was Bella supposed to be strong when she no longer knew how?</p><p>Carlisle slammed on the breaks just down the path from the house as he turned to her,"Darling, why are you crying? I thought you were feeling better."</p><p>She couldn't bring herself to answered him as she saw a small crowd of people waiting outside which only made her begin sobbing uncontrollably.</p><p>Immediately Carlisle turned off the car, then unbuckled himself, before racing over to her side and opening the door. Quietly he murmured to her, "I'll take you somewhere safe."</p><p>A bit louder she heard him shoo the crowd away, his family that had been hoping to meet her had instead met nothing but a horrible weak mess of sobs and snot. Bella couldn't even speak as her throat burned and her soul sank ever down into that black ink.</p><p>Curled up like a screaming toddler Bella felt herself be hefted up by Carlisle and carried swiftly.</p><p>Where? She could not guess, for it was a place she'd never been, but once Carlisle set her down on a bed in a rustic looking room, the man knelt before her. His golden eyes were bright as if he too were about to cry which made Bella's agony grow until her bawling was practically a wail.</p><p>Cool hands cup her her face and Carlisle's voice broke like a man desperate, "Isabella you need to tell me what's wrong,"</p><p>"I ruined everything!"she finally cracked, her voice sounded like static to her own ears,</p><p>"I was supposed to meet your Cousins and I was supposed to be strong for Jasper! And now I'm up here crying like a pathetic idiot where they can all hear me!"</p><p>"They can't hear you Isabella, this room is a guest suite and for the Denali that means it's soundproof," Carlisle assured her softly, gently, like she was about to shatter,"And I ask that you not call yourself an idiot."</p><p>Perhaps she already was breaking.</p><p>"You started crying before we reached here though, you haven't been quite yourself all morning," Carlisle stroked her face lightly,</p><p>"What happened with Charlie is difficult and I'm not surprised to find it weighing so heavily on you, but you know we'll be going back to him. I'll not keep you from him, he deserves better than that."</p><p>Bella shook her head and heaved a gravelly sigh which blended with a hiccough.</p><p>"If that's not it then tell me what it is," Carlisle pleaded so desperately it made Bella feel even worse as she cried,</p><p>"Everything! Renee's a horrible mother! Charlie loves me so much and I just abandoned him and broke my promise in one awful selfish act!</p><p>"Victoria nearly killed me on Alice's watch so she's probably feeling awful while Jasper's probably been thinking I'll hate him now that I've had time to think!"</p><p>It just kept coming then,</p><p>"I should have held it together for them! They need me right now and I'm falling apart! I'm supposed to be the one who worries I'm supposed to be the one who doesn't break!"</p><p>He was staring at her wide eyed, shocked as if she was something else and not his Mate Isabella swan. Carlisle stroked her hair with a quivering hand, his topaz eyes shimmering with Venom pooling over them,</p><p>"Isabella, you're still just a young woman. You can't shoulder everything alone, that's why I'm here. To aide you in bearing the weight of it all."</p><p>"You shouldn't have to help me make my problems go away Carlisle," Bella sobbed again, her face hot with exertion and her chest was beginning to ache form all the shaking,</p><p>"I should be strong enough to deal with them! That's why I'm your Mate"</p><p>"Bella you don't have to be strong for me!" Carlisle was close to hopeless, so desperate was he to convey the truth of the matter to her,</p><p>"Be strong for our children,yes, but not for me!"</p><p>Suddenly he fell backwards, he sat there on the floor like a doll whose strings had been completely cut and covered his mouth in clear horror,</p><p>"Bella I've shown you parts of myself I've never given any other. You've seen me weak, pleading, and desperate.</p><p>"Every member of our family, including the Denali, they look to me as this paragon with legendary self control and compassion. To them all I'm practically a symbol of discipline and steadfastness.</p><p>"But I've shown you what I truly am.</p><p>"I've trusted you with my jealousy, rage, lust, and selfishness so please don't be afraid Darling, you do not need to be strong for me."</p><p>Slowly he got back onto his knees and Bella watched as he laid his head into her lap like a small boy,</p><p>"Isabella. Give me your weakness, selfishness, despair, and pettiness. All the things you've never been able to show for fear of disappointing everyone you've ever taken care of.</p><p>"You're to be my wife. I'm the one person who you should never worry about needing to be strong for.</p><p>"We're not here for anyone else but you, my love. I've brought you here for your own reprieve from the chaos I've wreaked upon your life."</p><p>Bella found herself unable to do anything but curl around him as she continued to weep bitterly.</p><p>For everything.</p><p>All the stress she'd built up all the pain she'd caused everyone she loved through her selfishness. Through it all Carlisle held her steadily like a mountain being battered by the four winds.</p><p>Slowly as she wept, the numbness began to seep away. And as she allowed the fact of this trip being for her and no one else seep into her world, Bella's soul began returning from that dark place as she whispered between gaps,</p><p>"I should have asked you to take me to Port Angeles. At least then he'd know he could get to me if I called. All I could think of was helping Alice and Jasper but I've just hurt Charlie even more."</p><p>"If you apologize to him I will not be offended," Carlisle laid a gentle kiss on her knee, "I should have considered his feelings when planning to take you away from the consequences of our confession.</p><p>"All I could think of is how you would benefit from seeing our wayward children again."</p><p>"I'm just tired of all the lies, the ones that I shouldn't be having to tell," her heart was no longer unfeeling as she murmured the words into his hair, Bella's tears finally beginning to dry up completely while she began running the fingers of her good hand through her Mate's straw colored locks,</p><p>"I want to be proud of loving you, but I can't do that if I keep lying to everyone."</p><p>Carlisle turned his head a bit more in her lap so that he could look at her more clearly. His hands moved to gently caress her denim clad calves while he carefully informed her,</p><p>"It seems a bit counter productive, as I do not wish to worry you further, but I wasn't lying when I told your father the Neighbors were watching.</p><p>"Several of them saw the commotion. Which mean's it's unlikely that we will ever even be capable of hiding again."</p><p>Bella waited for the fury, anger, or panic to overtake her but she found that it wouldn't come. Instead, something closer to resignation than comfort welled up as she choked out a pathetic laugh,</p><p>"That's probably a bad thing, but I can't find the energy to be mad about it. Should I be worried? Because I'm not."</p><p>Letting out a sigh she confessed, "I'm just too tired for anything else."</p><p>"Then rest," he urged her tenderly as he laid another press of his lips to her knee, "I'll speak to Esme about getting you something to eat, but until then rest and even use the shower if you need it.</p><p>"Relax until you are truly and completely ready to reunite with our children and meet our extended family. Even if it takes a full day."</p><p>"I feel like saying 'thank you Darling' or something equally affectionate but I can't think of a pet name that would suite you," Bella sort of chuckled without humor as she never really considered herself a pet name person.</p><p>Renee called Phill 'Baby' and 'Sugar' and 'Sweetheart' so all of those seemed a bit to weird to be calling Carlisle. She sort of maybe loved when he addressed her as 'Darling' but he'd come up with that naturally.</p><p>"If you really wish to call me some affectionate epithet, I do not mind whatever you decide," Carlisle was smiling as if he had some great secret only he knew and Bella had no clue why until he lifted his head from her lap and nuzzled her nose in that way he did,</p><p>"You once called me Honey, though you likely don't recall it as you were quite busy with other things."</p><p>Bella raked her mind and tried her best to figure out what he was talking about but came up with absolutely nothing before she just gave up with her tired brain and softly requested, "What was I doing?"</p><p>"You were sleeping in a in the back of an ambulance with pain medication coursing through you," Carlisle confessed with such quiet reverence she wondered at the memory he clearly treasure,</p><p>"I rode with you and the EMT and when you turned to look at me through your very hazy eyes, you asked 'Is that you Honey?'"</p><p>Bella choked out a laugh at the story he apparently had kept to himself for some time as Carlisle sighed, "I asked if you were calling me Honey, for the EMT's sanity of course, and you said 'No I'm talking to Carlisle'."</p><p>It was too much as she started to genuinely laugh through the haze of tiredness, "No, you're making that up!"</p><p>"I'm not, I simply don't enjoy thinking about that day," he replied and Bella understood that much at least. The story was funny to be sure, but the situation hadn't exactly been a bundle of laughs.</p><p>"So rest," Carlisle reminded her as he pulled away before rising to his feet, "I'll speak to Esme and join you here soon."</p><p>"Thank you, Honey," Bella bit her lip feeling a bit awkward as she said the word but the shine in Carlisle's eye was worth the foreignness of the word.</p><p>He was worth a lot of things.</p><p> </p><hr/><p> </p><p>Having left Forks at 6 in the morning, they had arrived at the Denali's home at a few hours past noon. Bella had eaten a quick breakfast of a hot pocket and a bigger brunch at the Seattle Airport while waiting for their flight.</p><p>So, that was why, when she woke from her power nap at around 4:30, Bella was very glad that Carlisle was there to welcome her back to the land of the living with peck on the lips and a declaration of,</p><p>"Esme made you a cottage pie."</p><p>"Esme can cook?" Bella knew it came out garbled but he understood because he just smiled as he replied,</p><p>"Esme is probably the only one of use here who can cook."</p><p>She sighed in relief because that meant the woman had probably been smart enough to buy things Bella could actually use for simple meals during her stay with this particular branch of the family.</p><p>"I'm going to take a shower, and then I'll go meet them all."</p><p>He agreed easily with that plan and that was that.</p><p>Meeting Esme and Tanya was like meeting Snow White and Prince Charming in the flesh respectively. Only Prince Charming was a strawberry blonde bombshell with curves that could make Saint Peter sin while Snow White's eyes could likely kill a man a ten paces if she was so inclined.</p><p>Which was why it was a bit jarring when Tanya rushed up to Bella and took her hand in a gentle shake as she grinned like a firework on the 4th of July,</p><p>"You're far more beautiful than Alice described!"</p><p>The strawberry blonde Vampire then tossed Carlisle rather mock stern look, "She's wasted on you really."</p><p>Not having any idea on how to proceed Bella was glad that Carlisle wrapped an arm her waist before resting his head atop her mousy brown hair as he declared,</p><p>"I'm perfectly aware but I've tricked her into staying so I ask you don't steal her away."</p><p>Esme decided it was her turn to speak as she wrapped her arms around Tanya's waist from behind, kissed the blonde's cheek before propping her chin on her Mate's shoulder and sighing,</p><p>"I'm so happy for the two of you! Tanya and I have worried so much about Carlisle these past years and I'm so pleased he's finally found you."</p><p>"Thank you, but I think I'm kind of the real winner here," Bella could feel her cheeks heating up as she had little practice in being so bold with her Mate in front of strangers.</p><p>Kate and Irina were equally beautiful with their hair of flaxen curls that tumbled like waterfalls over their shoulders. Their feminine features were so beautifully balanced that Bella had the thought that they could easily pass as member's of Rosalie's family.</p><p>Both of them shone with an eagerness as they kept glancing between Bella and Carlisle with interest in a way that made the Human girl fear they'd corner her and begin trying to pry all the sordid details they could manage from her.</p><p>Olive skin and hair like a starless night described Carmen though, she stood just behind the other women happy to have Carlisle introduce Bella to them all as her Mate Eleazar had his arm draped over her shoulder in casual intimacy. He too was inhumanly handsome with coal black hair, a strong jaw which balanced his easy eyes.</p><p>They were more casual in their curiosity though when Eleazar kissed Bella's hand like some sort of regency gentleman, there was something in his expression like curiosity, or perhaps confusion.</p><p>The best part of it all?</p><p>Every single one of their eyes were gold, shining like beacons with eagerness.</p><p>Bella scanned them all happily and shook their hands, accepted their strangely excited kisses to the cheek and half hugs a bit awkwardly simply because that was her nature to be reserved.</p><p>Her determination though was strong as she politely made her greetings to these new Vampire friends and once social rule allowed, Bella removed herself from Carlisle. Then passed by them all in order to head towards the back of the living room.</p><p>The vaulted ceilings were beautiful in the rustic themed home which was practically a great lodge with many rooms and beautiful lights. Bella couldn't help but think an expert had meticulously picked out each piece of furniture and bobble to ensure beauty and balance.</p><p>Nothing though, was more wonderful to her than the sight of Alice holding Jasper's hand as they stood back, reluctant to greet her.</p><p>"Don't I get a hug?" Bella opened her arms towards them as she tried her best to recall all her love and affection, "I came all this way to see you after all."</p><p>Alice swallowed hard but her face which had been nearly nervous broke into a smile as she released Jasper's hand and rushed Bella at inhuman speeds, stopping inches before the Human. Bella only smiled wider as the tiny Vampire girl wrapped her deceptively  frail looking arms around around the Human.</p><p>Fulfilling her secret wish, Bella laid a kiss onto the girl's short black hair, "I've missed you so much it's almost crazy."</p><p>Alice inhaled deeply as she slid out of Bella's hold her face clearly full of something like surprise and love, "I'm so sorry I-"</p><p>"Don't," Bella shook her head, feeling more herself than she had in a very long time as she put hand on Alice's perfectly round cheek,</p><p>"I know how your gift works, you're not some all knowing deity. You don't ever have to apologize to me for your visions being wrong or arriving at the last possible moment.</p><p>"You don't even have to say sorry if you keep them from me. Sometimes staying quiet is the only thing you can do to keep the people you love safe."</p><p>Alice looked like she was about to cry as she brought her hand up to her mouth before going in for another hug which Bella allowed with more delight than it probably merited.</p><p>After Alice had her fill she dragged herself fully from Bella's arms and the Human girl turned to Jasper. Offering an encouraging smile she put out a hand,</p><p>"Can I have a hug yet? It feels like I've been waiting forever and the house is too big without you and Alice to fill it up."</p><p>Jasper did start crying.</p><p>Tears didn't fall of course, but his shoulder shook as he heaved a dry sob before Bella found herself in his arms like a trick of magic as the boy pressed his forehead into her neck and sobbed like a child.</p><p>Bella very gently stroked his hair in comfort, as she focused on her forgiveness and affection for the boy who'd listened to her, protected her, and loved her so very much so early on in her time with their family.</p><p>"It's alright Jasper, I was never angry," she whispered to him, not caring that the Denali were watching almost gobsmacked by the whole thing,</p><p>"I was just sad because you were so scared that I was."</p><p>Jasper inhaled deeply and slowly he grew calm. Bella wondered if it was from her own emotions feeding him but didn't ask as he pulled away a bit shyly before tucking his hands into his pockets,</p><p>"It's good to see you mama."</p><p>It was enough to have Bella laugh as she replied, "It's good to see you too Jazz."</p><p>Having finished her reunions she turned to the Denali who were still staring, looking for all the world like they'd witnessed Moses part the red sea while Carlisle just beamed like Christmas had arrived early.</p><p>"Carlisle said Esme made me food? I don't want it to cool too much because it's probably going to be best before it needs to be reheated."</p><p>"Yeah," Esme shook herself from whatever the Denali were seeing,</p><p>"Follow me to the kitchen I'll show you where everything is! Jasper says you cook so feel free to make whatever you want."</p><p>Bella tossed a small parting smile to the two Cullens before promising to catch up later, as she joined Esme in the trek to the kitchen, Carlisle waylaid her briefly to plant such a kiss on her that the Human girl was seeing stars for a full five minutes after. His whispered, "Never stop being perfect" rang in her ears even longer after.</p><p>She wasn't completely better.</p><p>Her feelings were still a bit muted and weary but having talked to Carlisle, being reminded that there was one person she could talk to and just be weak in front of helped.</p><p>Now that Charlie wasn't in standing before her in the flesh with all his righteous indignation and justified fury,  Bella had so many regrets.</p><p>She wished she'd kept her head and hadn't sounded like such a lost child. It likely hadn't helped her case with her father but it was still difficult to find the words with Charlie. Bella had spared herself from being known by him too deeply and this was where it had led.</p><p>An inability to communicate with him as well as she did with the Cullens whom she'd laid out her opinions to repeatedly.</p><p>It wasn't irreparable though.</p><p>She could fix it the same way she'd come to Carlisle and poured out all her weaknesses and fears.</p><p>Esme puttered around the kitchen while Bella watched from her seat on an elevated stool set up against the rather large island. The woman was practically buzzing eagerly as she set out a plate and a glass of lemonade. Bella couldn't help but find it extremely sweet as Esme served her a square of cottage pie with such a bright grin it was making the younger girl smile too.</p><p>"This looks really delicious, thank you," Bella offered as she picked up her fork and cut into the meal.</p><p>The sound of conversation could be heard in the other room and Bella's heart was still with Alice and Jasper. Their reunion was only a beginning. She'd still need to really talk with him before he'd likely feel right about going home.</p><p>But it spoke volumes that he was happy to hug her the way he had.</p><p>That Carlisle had let him.</p><p>"It's my pleasure! I can't imagine what they've been feeding you down in Washington," Emse chuckled a bit, likely knowing exactly how varied the Cullens cooking skills were as she'd once lived with them all.</p><p>"Mostly hot pockets and take out," Bella informed her spooning her first bite into her mouth and once the food hit her tongue she sighed out blissfully,</p><p>"I need this recipe."</p><p>That had the woman laughing softly and her voice was so lovely it was like the tinkling of a wind chime, "I'll write it down."</p><p>"I can't wait until I can get some pots and pans for that house," Bella half complained as she took a sip of her lemonade that was so perfectly balanced she was sort of suspicious over who Esme had been cooking for, but stayed silent on the topic as she recalled what Carlisle had shared of the woman's history,</p><p>"I'm seriously tired of pizza and hamburgers whenever I visit."</p><p>Letting out a hum Emse agreed as she sat herself down across from Bella, "It will probably be healthier for you that way."</p><p>It was like an actual horror movie as Bella had to sit there and eat her food while Esme , a complete stranger, watched keenly.</p><p>That was until Carlisle came into the kitchen with a rather charming smile and asked, "Can you give us a moment?"</p><p>Esme, of course, vacated her seat as she happily agreed to let the couple talk before fluttering her way to the living room, effectively saving Bella from the mortifying ordeal of being watched eating.</p><p>She let out a slow stream of air, unwilling to let the woman hear her heave a sigh of relief as Carlisle moseyed up to Bella before sitting down in Esme's vacated seat.</p><p>"How are you feeling?"</p><p>"Better, but not... perfect," Bella replied taking another bite of her food, glad that Carlisle pulled out his phone, likely cheeking his messages and whatever work e-mails he might have gotten,</p><p>"I'm sorry I dragged you out of work. It's going to be a mess when everyone hears about why you left so quickly."</p><p>Carlisle looked up from his phone even though Bella knew he didn't actually have to as he offered a gentle grin, "While I'm sure my popularity with patients will go down, I do not fear being fired.</p><p>"You're 18 and legally they can do nothing, besides I've never cared about rumors and idle small town talk. If I had, I would be a rather poor practitioner."</p><p>"Spoken like a true Ice King," Bella teased a bit as she shook her head and scooped up some mashed potato,</p><p>"Jessica said all the ladies were frustrated because you were as frigid as Antarctica."</p><p>"And how have you found me?" Carlisle tilted his head just so and Bella could see small bits of shine on his delicate straw colored eyelashes. Her heart skipped a beat at the sight of him so easy with her in a place he'd likely been a thousand times but was alien to her own body and mind.</p><p>"Seeing as I told Jessica that I was pretty frigid too, just the right temperature," Bella offered a bit of a smile as she turned away to get a sip of her drink.</p><p>"I'll be honest," Carlisle's tone shifted from the airily light flirtation from before as he shared with her,</p><p>"My greatest concern is how you will be received at school. I know there is already contention with Jessica and that girl Lauren you who followed you to your truck..."</p><p>He trailed off and Bella was beginning to see his concerns. She had been so focused on how to apologize to Charlie when they got back and how it would effect Carlisle's work, Bella hadn't stopped to think about the absolute anarchy that would likely erupt when she walked into the cafeteria and everyone knew.</p><p>"Alice can't exactly fight for your honor against Jessica Stanley if she attempts to assault you."</p><p>The idea of Jessica coming at Bella swinging had her holding back a snort. Sure, everyone had been a bit weird about her friendship with Edward but that was a boy supposedly her age.</p><p>There was definitely going to be some crude and cruel things said about Carlisle.</p><p>Jessica's preferred method of melee were words after all.</p><p>Lauren was a wild card and Bella knew that the other girl believed she had blackmail on her. So she wasn't concerned too much on that front.</p><p>"I'm more likely to punch Jessica than she is me," Bella informed him a bit oddly as the words tried to cling to her throat in a way she wasn't completely sure about.</p><p>Perhaps it was because she anticipated Carlisle's rather blankly surprised reaction, "And why is that?"</p><p>"If she calls me a money grubbing gold digger I'll just walk away," Bella informed him as she placed her fork on her plate which was nearly empty. She took a breathe then,</p><p>"But if she says something about you or the kids? I have no idea how I'll react and it's sort of starting to scare me now that I'm thinking about it."</p><p>"Then perhaps having one of the children nearby isn't such a bad Idea," Carlisle offered simply,</p><p>"I would hate for you to get in trouble with your father even further."</p><p>"You're right, he's gonna ground me forever and I don't want to know what he'll add to it if I get in a fight," Bella gave a tight smile because she was ready for Charlie to ground her and set a 7 O'clock bed time with call ins and forbidding sleep overs unless it was under his roof as well as any trip that lasted longer than a few hours hike.</p><p>She was ready to comply with it all.</p><p>It was what she deserved for doing what she had, they would all be reasonable restrictions she could obey so long as he didn't forbid her from dating Carlisle she'd do anything he asked.</p><p>"Are you going to call your friends?" Carlisle suddenly asked and Bella was glad that he brought it up because she truly was terrified to do it.</p><p>"Maybe later, or tomorrow, I'm already getting tired thinking about it."</p><p>"If you're done, then," Carlisle stood and nodded towards her mostly cleared plate, "You can begin getting to know our extended family better."</p><p>"That sounds fun."</p><p>And it was.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0017"><h2>17. [Interlude : Carlisle Cullen]</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Hi, I wanted to do Carlisle's POV as a halfway marker, but the events didn't shake out that way. SO, I've decided to do his POV for an interlude during their visit in Alaska. I would have made this a side story/one shot and might do more that way... I just wanted to have a little interlude with him that was still plot relevant before the next chapter...</p><p>For reasons....</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>"Sometimes, I believe my time has passed me by, that if she was Human she has gone from the world or her time as an immortal ended before we could ever chance to meet," Carlisle was surprised by his sudden candor with Eleazar.</p><p>It was the closest he'd ever come in his 352 years to opening up to someone else about the deep aching loneliness that practically clung to his back like a demon whose weight equaled his own times two.</p><p>He was just so exhausted.</p><p>Tired of having his children pair off every decade or so only to leave him like a solitary tower they could rally around when they missed the noise of a full house. Even Edward preferred solitude to Carlisle's company.</p><p>What boy frozen at his age could desire to live in the head of a weary and love sick old man who longed for a concept? It was't love if you'd never met them, it was simply a pathetic longing that kept you wandering through the ceaseless days with no real reason to enjoy the scope of it all.</p><p>"Carlisle, my friend," Eleazar's tone clearly displayed his own bewilderment at Carlisle's despondent declaration as he, in all his wisdom, practically fumbled,</p><p>"If there is any logic or fairness in this universe then you haven't waited for simply nothing. We are all made of the same stars, perhaps whatever will make her up is merely taking longer to arrive here.</p><p>"She would have to be a rare creature indeed to deserve someone so good as you."</p><p>"No," Carlisle leaned against the railing of the deck as he closed his eyes against the sight of the falling snow on the tundra which surrounded the home Esme and Tanya's family kept,</p><p>"She would only need to be understanding. "</p><p>Because every morning his heart sinned as he cursed the sunrise for arriving before her.</p><p>It was funny, the conversations that came to you in the strangest of moments.</p><p>As, that was the very scene which was playing through Carlisle Cullen's mind only a sparse decade later as he watched Isabella Swan, his Mate found at long last, writhing on the floor of a ballet studio, and screaming in agony.</p><p>While <em>someone else's Venom</em> was attempting to plunge it's way to her heart as Carlisle, swiftly but gently attempted to tie a tourniquet around her leg which had suffered a severe compound fracture.</p><p>It was all he could think of as the entire scope of his knowledge scrambled to find a way to save her from being frozen at the age of 17, cursing him to a life of pretending.</p><p>
  <em>Always pretending.</em>
</p><p>Inside of him, the Bond he shared with her which had always been cool and powerful like an ancient primordial sea in it's great calm, ignited as something like white liquid fire spread through him. Her own half of their connection breaking through to him and pulling him forth, begging to be saved from whatever danger had befallen her.</p><p>The moment he realized what he had to do, it was a choicless thing. His body moved without even considering the ramifications of the fact that Carlisle Cullen, 362 year old Animal Drinker, was about to consume Human blood for the first time.</p><p>Gently, kindly, twistedly he grabbed her wrist and whispered, "I love you."</p><p>Giving her that so her soul may know it should he commit the hellish sin of killing her.</p><p>With that, he could not waste anymore time. Carlisle had sunk his teeth into her wrist in an exact mirror of <em>That Vampire's.</em></p><p>Aro had always called Human blood an addicting Ambrosia which would never truly be described as anything but the only heaven their kind would ever experience. Edward had once left him for the allure of that chance to guzzle down such a forbidden nectar.</p><p>All of his children save for Rosalie had lost their minds completely to the pull of Human blood and killed with little remorse.</p><p>Each time they all shook their heads and whispered 'too bad, too bad' and moved on from the tragedy of it.</p><p>It was no surprise then that Carlisle had been afraid.</p><p>Jasper screamed and lunged at him viciously only to have Edward, sweet boy, fight the empath off so that Carlisle could complete his task. For only Edward could read his thoughts and know what was being attempted.</p><p>Carlisle was so afraid as he let her hot life force fill his mouth as he took his first pull.</p><p>And he tasted her.</p><p>Isabella.</p><p>The girl whose blood was bordering on irresistible to every one of his children, especially poor Edward, was the first and last Human he'd ever drink from.</p><p>She tasted like the bitter salt of his unshedable tears, anguish, and the eternal loneliness that he would face should she perish. No frenzy or panicked feeding over took him as he drank down the sour bitter flavor of his own bleak and hopeless future without her.</p><p>It was such an unnatural abomination for him to drink her, as if it was an sin equal to boiling a calf in it's mother's milk.</p><p>Once her blood was clean he released her, no sooner and no later. Carlisle sealed her wound with his own Venom as a primal urge filled him to ensure no trace of <em>That Vampire</em> remained. He had no shame as he cradled her against him begging God not to take her in his desperateness, even though she was mostly out of the thicket of dense dark forest of danger she'd been lost in.</p><p>There was no shame in him.</p><p>Not for her.</p><p>He knew what he was.</p><p>They all considered him a virtuous and righteous man.</p><p>Carlisle was duly proud of his accomplishments, his maintenance of his self-control and dedication to his lifestyle. His oath to help people.</p><p>None of that meant he wasn't just a man.</p><p>A very old man who had fallen in love with a girl who somehow understood. She saw him and did not think him this great being of awe, nor did Isabella view him as a great monster needing to continually pummel itself to please God.</p><p>In the low light of her childhood bedroom with her father down the hall, when Carlisle touched her with lust in his heart while a fire burned in his belly, and he tasted her skin. That was first time in his existence he had ever felt clean.</p><p>It was monstrous and perhaps he was worse for not caring.</p><p>Yet, as he stood once more on that railed deck surrounded by snow, Carlisle couldn't bring himself to regret any moment that had led him there.</p><p>Every wrong turn, stumble, and fall had brought him to that very moment as his silent heart was filled with so much love that it was near beating for the first time in nearly 400 years as Isabella made snow balls as fast as humanly possible while Alice and Jasper tossed them at Kate and Irina who were engaging in much the same activities behind a makeshift wall of snow.</p><p>Occasionally the Human girl would attempt to toss a snowball for a surprise attack on their Denali cousins, and a few even landed. Much to Jasper's elation and their cousin's mock chagrin.</p><p>While Esme and Tanya had been eager to meet Isabella, Carlisle was surprised at how much of a shine Irina and Kate had taken to the girl.</p><p>His girl.</p><p>Every member of the Denali coven had been frozen between the ages 21 and 29. Eleazar being the oldest physically. Tanya, their leader, was the oldest in truth. She was even older than Carlisle himself.</p><p>Kate and Irina came close to her though in actual age.</p><p>So it was rather amusing to see the two practically buzzing around Isabella. It wasn't quite a 'New Toy' mentality as it seemed, from his perspective, to be curiosity over the girl who had been able to Bond herself to Carlisle Cullen and bring such a creature of self denial to his very knees.</p><p>Carlisle fell a little bit more in love with Isabella as she visibly took it all in stride.</p><p>No doubt she was more worried that they'd disapprove of her, but there was nothing that could cause that after the scene with Alice and Jasper on that first day. How she'd displayed her hold over them like a hen gathering her lost chicks under her wings.</p><p>"Your Isabella is remarkable," Esme leaned on the railing next to him to watch her sisters-in-law playing so gently but exuberantly with her siblings.</p><p>"She prefers Bella," Carlisle corrected, because he was a bit selfish and liked that he himself was the only one permitted to call His Mate by her full name. It was an innocent thing but he was hungry for it,</p><p>"But I agree, she is nothing short of perfect."</p><p>"She must love very deeply to have been so effected by her father's disapproval," Esme mused and it felt to him a little too much like prying but she didn't mean to offend. No, Esme was a kind and adventurous soul who enjoyed caring for others.</p><p>She made Tanya, who was a bit more hot blooded and sharp clawed a perfect match.</p><p>Though it spoke to Isabella's own ability to keep her own thoughts close to her chest for the sake of everyone else that Esme hadn't puzzled out that it was not only about Charlie.</p><p>He couldn't help but think that if Isabella and he had talked before they arrived in Alaska, that the Denalis would be a bit worried and slightly appalled at Isabella's callous behavior as she romped around with Jasper and Alice looking for all the world carefree.</p><p>A pillar for the children nervous to come home.</p><p>Even as she still whispered to him in the night about how terrified she was to face Charlie again, that he would not forgive her.</p><p>"Charlie Swan is very good man, even I hope to reconcile the situation to him, as rather inappropriate it is from a Human stand point," Carlisle gave her that, it was regret able that Isabella's father was hurt, but the Chief of Police was right.</p><p>They had no business carrying on and loving each other.</p><p>But sometimes love was found where it simply wasn't supposed to be.</p><p>Never had Carlisle ever fantasized he'd meet his Mate in the ER, nor had he thought she would have been such a point of contention in his family before he'd even laid eyes on her simply by being Edward's singer.</p><p>His first thought about Isabella had been that she was troublesome.</p><p>And wasn't that cosmically hilarious?</p><p>It was easy from a bird's eye view though, to see every soul who belonged together when they didn't even know it. Perhaps it was God's way of showing his mercy to the dark creatures they had become by allowing them the one thing he hadn't permitted Humans.</p><p>To meet that perfect person and simply <em>know</em>.</p><p>There was a cruelness to it as well.</p><p>Because if Carlisle had not, by chance and foolishness, been turned that fateful night in sewers of London, he would have died long ago. Married a woman who was likely bookish and hearty enough for labor that was required of a Clergyman's wife, and he would have perhaps been content.</p><p>Never knowing that Isabella would be born centuries later and waiting for a man who would never come because his bones were buried alongside someone else's centuries before she was even a thought.</p><p>Perhaps they were the lucky ones after all.</p><p>"You seem different," Esme smiled at him knowingly, a bit too much so as she began to show a few teeth,</p><p>"Bonding to someone reveals things to us that we never knew. I hadn't ever thought I was the kind of woman to compose sonnets about my spouse but here I am!</p><p>"So what has Miss Bella taught you Carlisle?"</p><p>He didn't know what to say to that. Really it was an innocuous friendly question from someone who loved him dearly. A good friend and daughter, but he felt like the answer was perhaps a bit too intimate to share with anyone else but Bella.</p><p>How could he tell Esme that Isabella had taught him that his children had needed someone to show them that they were not monsters? How could Carlisle confess that Isabella was teaching all of them to love themselves despite the danger they posed to her constantly?</p><p>That she was showing him how to be selfish, to want and to take without regret.</p><p>"I believe that I am still learning," he replied instead of disclosing the full truth. It felt like a betrayal to share with Esme his true feelings on that particular matter.</p><p>Perhaps it was because he feared disappointing her with the knowledge that he'd lived for so long, yet he'd been unable to be what his children needed.</p><p>His own flaws and self recriminations had gotten in the way of it, or even that there was a bestial creature that was growing inside of him that desired only one thing.</p><p>Esme was apparently content with that answer, as Carlisle knew she would be. It was exactly his way to give such a non-reply to such a heavy topic to keep from burdening those who relied on him.</p><p>And didn't that make him and Isabella quite a pair?</p><p>They talked more, about Tanya's desire to remodel one of their other homes in the northern part of the state, and how Esme was absolutely in heaven picking out draperies and furnishings. Carlisle reminded himself to ask her for a few catalogs that Isabella may like.</p><p>There was a cottage that still needed filling after all.</p><p>It was in the middle of their talk that he caught the sound of Isabella informing their children that she was a little wet and too cold to be out any longer, before she began trudging her way up to the house.</p><p>Jasper, ever the southern gentleman, made her squeal as he hauled the Human girl over his shoulder and up the walk faster than her very clumsy pace would have allowed.</p><p>Carlisle shook his head at the boy but was pleased to find his son deposit Isabella gently on the deck. Giving a glance to Esme, Carlisle politely excused himself from their conversation and went to meet the Human girl where she was attempting to wipe the snow off of her pants with her one good hand.</p><p>"Need help?"</p><p>Isabella looked up at him with a mock glare which he couldn't help but let out a chuckle at while she replied,</p><p>"No thank you, you just sat there having coffee talk when I was fighting a war."</p><p>"Forgive me," he knew he was likely grinning more than the situation merited but she'd just come in from playing with their children and Carlisle couldn't help but think she was at her most lovely,</p><p>"But technically I'm a medic and I would have been no help whatsoever, save for now. I need to make sure your stitches aren't too wet."</p><p>Dragging her feet against the front mat to get the remaining snow off of her boots, Isabella let out a put upon sigh, but there was a shine in her eye,</p><p>"Alright, I guess if you really want to play Doctor that bad..."</p><p>Somewhere behind him Irina practically chortled before Kate shoved her sister for her rather immature behavior. Fortunately, Emmett was a fixture at their house so Bella just shook her head good naturally and moved on,</p><p>"I should probably call Angela and Leah too, they're probably worried sick.'</p><p>So they'd be going to their room then, Carlisle didn't mind it as he pressed a kiss to her temple before taking her hand, tangling their fingers together but wanting more as they made their way into the lodge in tandem.</p><p>As they ambled up the stairs the Human girl sighed, "It's so beautiful out here. I know I'll comeback again, but there's a peacefulness that just makes it easy to shove everything away for a little while."</p><p>"It's the magic of the frozen desert, civilization is miles away and the solitude allows us to be who we wish to, free of the constraints of society," Carlisle replied easily, everything was easy with her,</p><p>"No doubt it would be the same in a house in the middle of the great Sanoran Desert you are more familiar with."</p><p>"Probably," she shrugged a bit but he knew her well enough to see she was thinking on the matter a bit more.</p><p>Once they reached the guest suite, he was a bit startled to find her immediately undressing without prompt or request for privacy. It was enough to get those low kindling embers in his stomach glowing brighter.</p><p>How comfortable she was, baring her flesh to him, willing to display herself in the harsh light of day.</p><p>He tried to busy himself grabbing his medical bag at a Human pace to allow her at least the decency of him not completely ogling her like a teenage boy with no self control.</p><p>When he turned around, she was wearing the simple silk robe that Tanya had provided that morning. The deep sapphire blue made her look brighter than the jewel itself as she began to unwrap her wounded palm.</p><p>He got to work pulling out antibiotic cream, and a new bandage to protect the sutures from snagging on the wrap and as Isabella fully uncovered her injury he was pleased to smell that the cut was still healing well and remaining uninfected.</p><p>As a Doctor he'd been up close and personal with thousands of Humans. He prided himself on his ability to ignore their rather pleasant smells and more intimate reactions to his Vampiric beauty. Especially when he offered gentle smiles of comfort to his patients.</p><p>No one could ever accuse him of having a terrible bedside manner.</p><p>With Isabella though? Even though treating her himself was already a blatant ethical violation, Carlisle couldn't help but be swept up in her aroma.</p><p>Strawberry shampoo coated on the surface, but the honest scent of her skin was like the echoed memory of honey cakes. Kissing her proved that her flavor was so sweet it might give him a toothache if he were capable of it.</p><p>Which was why, being like this, kneeling before her while she wore only her undergarments and a thin robe, he couldn't resist planting a light kiss on the wrist of her injured hand. It wasn't as if he would be distracted from his work completely, the action was simply a small temptation he was not above giving into.</p><p>Not when they were alone.</p><p>She, of course, didn't' even flinch, though her heart beat a bit faster reminding him that she felt it too. That pull which would inevitable lead to their collision.</p><p>"No moisture appears to have effected them, though I'll have to replace the wrap to ensure that it remains that way," Carlisle offered her a smile and found Isabella watching him intently, with her wide brown eyes. Others would call them doe-like but Carlisle was aware that this creature before him was no prey, she would swallow him alive the moment he permitted.</p><p>She replied with an almost shy grin as her heart rate increased once more, and he realized that she was raking her eyes down his kneeling form.</p><p>"That's good, I'm glad I didn't ruin them."</p><p>"If you don't mind the company, I would not be offended if you called your friends," Carlisle offered in an attempt to distract himself from the sudden musk of her arousal that had begun seeping into the air, feeding his own burning desire for her that had been a murmur under his flesh since the moment they met.</p><p>He watched as she took a deep breath and let it out, her heart calming slightly as she did so, "Yeah that's probably a really good idea.</p><p>"Just.. Hold on for a second."</p><p>Not one to argue with such a simple request, Carlisle watched as Isabella lay herself a bit gawkily onto her side in order for to be capable of reaching the denim pants she'd discarded. The shift of her vestment allowing him to see a bit more than she would have likely intended for their rather casual setting but he was glad she trusted him so much as she didn't even attempt to fix it.</p><p>Even as he himself turned away, focusing on rather uselessly examining the new wrap he'd retrieved from his bag.</p><p>Once she was sitting straight up again Isabella flipped her phone opened as she once more placed her left hand in front of him. After a small beat she stopped and let out a bit of a amused laugh,</p><p>"I should have just asked you to get it."</p><p>"I would never have presumed," Carlisle looked back up to her, no doubt his amusement at her rather graceless antics shone through. She truly was remarkable and he would miss that part of her. The one that fumbled around and ambled about cautiously.</p><p>Though it would likely permanently be preserved in her habit of blurting out a paragraph and a half of words in a rush when she was overwhelmed by her many thoughts. He knew he'd cherish that part of her even more when Isabella took on a less fragile form.</p><p>It was an honor, to preserve this part of her alive forever in his memories though. There was no way he would regret changing her, keeping her forever. He had grown too selfish in his love for her to ever attempt to convince Isabella to go back on that choice.</p><p>No.</p><p>Missing that part of her would be easy. They would be fond memories to look back on, in perhaps the same way Human couples looked back on their younger days with fondness. Never wanting to exchange their years together for something so trivial as a trait they'd grown out of.</p><p>So, he got to work applying cream to her sutures, just enough to keep them from overly sticking to the bandage, as Isabella pressed call on one of her contacts. Absently as Carlisle gently wrapped her hand once more, he wondered which of her friends she'd chosen to contact first.</p><p>It was't long before that unasked question was answered as the voice of Angela Webber came through,</p><p>"Bella! I've been going crazy and I couldn't decide if I should call. I didn't know if you would even answer!"</p><p>"Hey, Angela," Isabella was in her element as her beautiful voice grew soothing, it was not quite the tone she used for Alice and Jasper, but there was a comfort to it nonetheless as he finished wrapping her arm and made to leave her for privacy's sake.</p><p>"It's alright, I'm safe and I'm not in any danger," Isabella said the words as she gazed up at him with wide pleading eyes.</p><p>Stay.</p><p>That's what they said.</p><p>And who was he to argue?</p><p>So Carlisle laid himself down on the queen size bed and watched her, listening to the conversation she was having.</p><p>It was no surprise at all when she laid down next to him, pressing her back into his chest.</p><p>"I'm in Alaska with Alice and Jasper's relatives. You've probably heard about what happened with D-"</p><p>She cut herself off and in an attempt to provide strength, comfort, or whatever else his Mate may need, Carlisle placed a hand on her stomach. It was barely covered by the robe but he had no intent on bringing her any carnal pleasure with the touch.</p><p>"Carlisle."</p><p>"Is it true?" Angela's reply came so quiet and unsure, Carlisle himself didn't know the girl well enough to puzzle out how she may respond to the affirmative.</p><p>Bella though, she used her injured hand to gently guide his own under the fabric of her kimono causing his fingers to press against her hot flesh.</p><p>"Yeah, we've been seeing each other since just after my birthday."</p><p>Primal, that was the only way which could describe the urge that swept over him as she so very proudly declared their relationship. Carlisle had to remind himself that this was important to Isabella, he could not ruin this as he allowed that bestial thing to crash through him. Only permitting his control over himself to waver in the slightest as his fingers stroked the heated skin of her stomach with a bit less innocence.</p><p>She took a breath as her friend in Washington remained silent for a long moment and he could see Isabella's throat working as she swallowed back whatever fears she was experiencing. The sound of it was enough to have him nuzzling her hair in an attempt to be closer to her. The strawberry scent was mostly faded and replaced with a hibiscus concoction that their hostesses had provided.</p><p>"Bella I don't even know what I'm supposed to say to that," Angela sounded devastated. It was enough to have the girl in his arms taking a deep breath, clearly she was invested in this conversation and wanted to keep her head.</p><p>Carlisle himself stopped breathing. Focusing only on the beat of Isabella's heart, he reminded himself that Angela was right. It was wrong for a 18 year old girl to be sleeping with and dating a 33 year old man.</p><p>That was the Human way of it.</p><p>He'd a been a Vampire too long.</p><p>Apparent age stopped meaning anything once the Human mindset was shed. If he'd changed Isabella right then and there, and she was frozen a young woman, no Vampire would bat an eye at their pairing. No Vampire would care at their disparity in appearance.</p><p>It simply didn't matter in a society where 17 year old boy was actually 200 and his 28 year old husband was only 50.</p><p>Really did it matter that he was already 363 to Isabella's 18? In 1500 years when she was 1518 and he was 1863 it wasn't going to look like much was it?</p><p>"You don't have to approve," Isabella sounded close to breaking but her tone remained steady as Carlisle did his best to pour his affection into her with only the light stroke of his hand along with the press of his nose into her hair. Deeply the Vampire inhaled.</p><p>"I just- I can't have more people telling me it's wrong when he treats me right. He respects me, and listens to me. Angela, I know he's a lot older but he's a really good man."</p><p>"So... Not an over glorified librarian then?"</p><p>Confusion immediately filled him but Isabella laughed, it was a beautiful laugh which made her smile broadly and originated deep inside her belly which caused her slight frame to vibrate against his own granite form.</p><p>"No, but remember what else I said that day?"</p><p>"He's not perfect," Angela sighed and Carlisle knew that Isabella could probably feel him smiling against her hair as she replied,</p><p>"He's flawed, but I think he might be perfect for me. Just me though."</p><p>"You're coming back right?" the girl's voice was suddenly tense and Carlisle couldn't help but think she may have become uncomfortable with Isabella's confession but he remained quiet as his Mate sighed.</p><p>"Yeah, at the end of the week. I'm actually going to call Leah too, have you heard from her? Does she know?"</p><p>"No," Angela was sounding a bit broken up and Carlisle could hear Isabella's pulse quicken at that tone while the other girl continued,</p><p>"She's not answering my calls.... Bella I think I messed up."</p><p>"Messed up?" Isabella's tone grew worried, and she shifted a bit in his hold which Carlisle allowed, hoping his chilled flesh wasn't causing her temperature to drop too low.</p><p>He'd have to bring out her heater again.</p><p>"Leah likes you better than she likes me," she assured her distressed friend, "There's no way you messed up.</p><p>"You'll see, she's probably just caught a cold from going diving in the middle of winter and is too busy sleeping it off to talk."</p><p>Then, Carlisle heard something that he was sure not even Isabella expected as Angela Webber confessed, "I kissed her when she dropped me off at home."</p><p>"In my truck?" was Isabella's first response and it was simply curious and he realized that she'd never said anything about Esme and Tanya... He'd never thought much of her reaction because Vampires never thought much of any of those things, especially when Bonds were involved.</p><p>She'd hardly even flinched when Jasper brought up 3 Way Split Bonds....</p><p>"What does that have to do with anything?!" Angela sounded a bit perturbed, offended maybe, as if Isabella was going to demand she pay to clean out the old beat up leather seats of The Beast because of a little lesbian kissing.</p><p>"Because I need details!" the girl in his arms demanded, "Honestly! Did she kiss back?! Or did she react really badly right off the bat? Or did Leah even react at all? This is important Angela.</p><p>"She might like you back but feel weird about it because of your really recent break ups or she might be straight and you'll have to talk it out to make sure you stay friends!</p><p>"Though if she's really mean about it I don't think we can keep hanging out with her."</p><p>Carlisle had never heard his Mate so frantically interested, practically gossipy in the most sincere way. It made his heart feel so vast that it might just start beating again.</p><p>"You're not freaked out.. that I like girls too?" the terror in that small voice was so plain that Carlisle could feel his Mate's muscles tense as Angela nearly sobbed,</p><p>"That I might be bisexual?"</p><p>"Angela," Isabella's voice was finally so soft that it rivaled the way she had spoken to Jasper upon their reunion,</p><p>"It takes all sorts to make a world and if you're bisexual that's perfectly fine."</p><p>
  <em>'love as long as it's good and true can't possibly be a sin'</em>
</p><p>He was completely mad for Isabella Marie Swan.</p><p>Something like a quite sniffle came from the other side of the line and Carlisle couldn't help but kiss Isabella's crown as Angela choked out,</p><p>"Yeah in your truck. I didn't' even help her take it back like she asked before I messed it all up!</p><p>"When it happened, Leah didn't run or get angry she just, didn't do anything. Like I scared her stiff it was really awkward that I tried to say sorry, or goodbye but she just drove off."</p><p>Closing his eyes he listened to her impart what wisdom she could from her limited experience while comforting Angela. Assuring her that no matter what Leah's reaction to her feelings might be, there was no reason to be ashamed of them.</p><p>Carlisle just held Isabella and continued to stroke her bare skin until Angela's confidence was restored even if only slightly.</p><p>There was only so much a single phone call could do after all.</p><p>And when Isabella said her goodbyes and hung up her phone, all he could do was press his lips to her's in something far deeper than a sweet caress. Something stronger and more needful as she chuckled against him and eventually succumbed to his passion for her.</p><p>Even just a little bit.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I rewrote the outline AGAIN because of some stuff but we're back on track.</p><p>When I was doing rewrites I was just like 'I'm too gay to have this many het couples' so yea.... Happy B-Day to the few of you who wanted Angela/Leah</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0018"><h2>18. Chapter 18</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Hi... Sorry...</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>On Tuesday Bella knew that she couldn't put off her talk with Jasper any longer.</p><p>Alice and Irina had made it very apparent that they all wanted to play in the snow later and Bella had the feeling that if she didn't talk to him before then, it would never happen. There would always be this strangeness between them where he'd likely know she'd forgiven him but without proper closure...</p><p>Bella needed to give that to him.</p><p>So in the early hours of the morning as she puttered around making breakfast, while Carlisle was hunting with Esme and Tanya , Bella wasn't surprised when Alice sort of just moseyed into the kitchen.</p><p>"Jazz is out back on the deck watching our Cousins have a snowman building contest, he's playing referee but it's not taking much of his focus if you want to talk," Alice informed her, without so much as a good morning and Bella was relieved that their routine was going to pick up exactly where it left off.</p><p>"We need to talk too," Bella reminded her as she flipped her over easy eggs in the pan, before sparing a glance to the sausage patty she had in the next pan over.</p><p>Alice leaned back against the island and shook her head, "Not really. I know you're not angry but I think....</p><p>"I'm pretty sure I'll be good after taking you on a bit of a shopping trip when we stop over in Seattle on the way back home."</p><p>She couldn't help it as she let out a laugh at the much tinier girl's blatant antics, "Alright, I'll go shopping for 1 outfit. Only one though and it's not because I think our relationship hinges on it. It's because I like you too much to say no."</p><p>A bright beaming smile was the answer given as Bella shook her head and turned back to pull her sausage off the fire, soon after that, her eggs joined it on the plate. Toast came next and finally her hash which she'd started a bit late.</p><p>It was a heavier meal, but the comfort was a bit necessary. Alice very casually sort of vanished somewhere into the house, likely to attempt to give Bella the illusion of privacy with Jasper. There was no way the prescient girl hadn't seen the discussion already, or that the various members of the Denali Coven wouldn't hear it.</p><p>Bella reminded herself that a lack of privacy was the norm, so with her plate in hand she took herself out to the deck. As promised, facing the seemingly endless blanket of white snow and ice, Jasper was standing, hands in his pockets watching Irina and Kate building an army of snowman while Carmen and Eleazar did the very same about 3 yards away.</p><p>"Whose winning?" she asked casually placing her plate on the railing and using her good hand to pick her fork up off the plate, then proceeded to cut into her eggs. As she took her first bite Bella recalled forgetting to salt them but didn't mind it as there was likely enough sodium in the sausage already.</p><p>"Kate and Irina, but it's to be expected. Kate's actually almost as fast as Edward so any game of speed is usually easy to call early," Jasper replied and Bella thought it might have sounded casually comfortable, but the boy hadn't even spared her a side glance and to her that alone said enough.</p><p>"Where do you rank?"</p><p>Finally he looked at her, his gaze a bit puzzled and Bella lifted a forkful of sausage and hash up to her mouth, "In speed."</p><p>She took the bite and Jasper gave her a single shoulder shrug as he turned his focus back to the contest, "I'm not the fastest, not the strongest...</p><p>"I've always taken a bit of pride in my tactical know how. You should know what I mean."</p><p>That did confuse her a little, but Bella didn't let it stumble her as she chewed her food, then swallowed thoughtfully. What could possibly have made Jasper think she had any tactical ability whatsoever? It was a bit funny to think that of her, the girl who tended to just bluster through things.</p><p>"I really don't but I'll take the compliment," Bella teased a bit lightly and Jasper once more looked at her with that puzzled expression.</p><p>"You figured out that Alice's Visions might be a set up before anyone else did and you even realized that they might drag in a bit of new blood too."</p><p>"Not before you I bet."</p><p>"But I have a head for tactics."</p><p>Shaking her head Bella smiled at the boy not knowing what to say. There was no way she was some great mind that could navigate a battle field. After all, she couldn't even win a game of chess against the computer when it was on medium.</p><p>"I just know how Alice's Visions work."</p><p>Jasper didn't look completely convinced but he didn't turn away again as he watched her eat for a few moments, Bella oddly enough didn't mind it. Then, he said something she knew she would never forget,</p><p>"You set up that Honey trap for James and it worked. If you'd been a Vampire he'd have been dead before the rest of us arrived."</p><p>"I just knew what he wanted-"</p><p>"And planned accordingly," Jasper cut her off, his amber eyes intense as if trying to really convey the weight of his words, what it meant,</p><p>"That's being tactical, seeing a situation, knowing your enemy well enough to be positive how it'll play out. Understanding people and cutting to the heart of what they'll do, say, how to make them lose.</p><p>"How to make them win."</p><p>"You really know what you're taking about," she observed, a bit taken aback by his sudden passionate words as Jasper had always seemed like a calm collected boy. Alice had referred to him as sensitive, which Bella could understand, he was and empath after all.</p><p>"I was the youngest Major in the Confederate army for a reason," he actually smiled then, as if he was a bit proud of that particular accomplishment.</p><p>"The Confederate Army? Doesn't seem like the kind of place for a sensitive southern boy like you," she did her best to keep her tone light, but there was a truth to them. Of course she knew there had been much more to the civil war than the abolitionist movement but that was quite a big sticking issue.</p><p>So her heart practically sang as Jasper leaned in as if about to disclose a great and wonderful secret,</p><p>"Yeah well it's the best place to be. Down South not many questions get asked when a Major is escorting Runaway Slaves in seemingly the wrong direction."</p><p>From the pit of her stomach a laugh bubbled up and made her actually shake, the mirth that filled her at the knowledge that this Vampire had been a member of such a movement as the Underground Railroad while serving with the Confederate Army was almost too much!</p><p>No wonder he felt so confident talking about battle plans and effectiveness.</p><p>"You must have so many stories," Bella sighed as she tried to get more of her potatoes, her eyes felt a bit watery from her previous laughter,</p><p>"Saved so many lives."</p><p>"Not enough," Jasper's expression fell then, and Bella pursed her lips a bit as he explained with something like shame,</p><p>"Not as many as I ended after I was Changed."</p><p>He sighed and Bella wondered at him as the boy closed his eyes, seemingly lost back in those days when things were different. How disparate she couldn't know, but Jasper appeared like he wasn't very keen on sharing just yet,</p><p>"Even worse, not as many as I've taken without meaning to."</p><p>"You haven't been at it long," she tried a bit gently. Edward had said that, hadn't he? That Jasper had been at their diet of Animal blood for the least amount of time,</p><p>"Mistakes happen. Especially when you're starving yourself. I figure your thirst isn't exactly helped by your Gift."</p><p>Especially with everything she knew about Edward's extreme draw to her as well as how apparently very appetizing to everyone, save for Carlisle, she smelled. Part of her wondered if it was a Bond thing or a Carlisle thing, because the Doctor didn't seem keen on anyone's blood whatsoever.</p><p>"That's not an excuse for what I almost did to you," he argued, but it sounded weak to Bella's ears, like he wanted to be wrong, "What I might do again."</p><p>No.</p><p>Jasper sounded like he needed to be wrong, like a man who required proof of something that he could not see or touch.</p><p>"No, but it doesn't matter," Bella looked him straight in they eye and gave him the only thing she could, the only thing she had,</p><p>"Because I'll forgive you each time. No matter what."</p><p>"And if I kill you?" his eyes shone brightly with emotion and once again tears which gathered but did not overflow.</p><p>"Jasper, we'll just have to make sure we're not alone, not until you're confident enough that you won't," Bella took another forkful of eggs into her mouth and wasn't surprised to find them getting cold,</p><p>"I trust you but that doesn't mean anything if you don't trust yourself. So if you're uncomfortable, we'll make sure there's always someone with us until you don't have to worry anymore.</p><p>"Whether that's in 3 years or 5 years it'll be your call."</p><p>A chuckle escaped him then, there was no amusement but Bella thought it was a good place to start. She was a bit confused then as he reached into his back pocket and pulled out what looked like a small black cardboard box. He said nothing as he offered it up and Bella took it with a modicum of confusion as well as caution.</p><p>Very carefully she opened the rather flimsy thing and choked, "Jasper no!"</p><p>There in that black little container, that had to cost less than a full dollar for all it's quality, sat an aerosol can of hairspray as well as a mini candle lighter, both designed like key chains.</p><p>"It's a hell of a lot better than Mace for the things you'll be up against," Jasper urged strongly, the force of his words shook Bella to her very core as if he knew something that she didn't as he explained,</p><p>"There's more things that wander the forest then us Vampires and fire's effective against pretty much anything."</p><p>And suddenly she knew.</p><p>Or she remembered rather.</p><p>The rest of the story that Jacob had told her about the Cullens original arrival in Forks, "Like Shape-Shifting Spirit Warriors who become Wolves?"</p><p>Jasper didn't seemed shocked in the least as he gave a slow single nod, "Like Shape-Shifting Spirit Warriors who become Wolves."</p><p>Bella closed her eyes and just shut the lid on her box. There wasn't anything she could do or say as she slid the thing into her hoodie pocket.</p><p>Later, she'd attach it to her truck keys. Jasper was right about one thing. It was going to be a hell of a lot better than Mace if she came face to face with Victoria or Laurent. But in that moment she sighed,</p><p>"Alright. Cool, that's horrifying and I'll process it later. Probably have to sit Carlisle down but that'll probably end up being interesting at least."</p><p>Jasper's laugh was actually bright then, as if he thought it was the most hilarious thing in the world that Ephraim Black had actually been able to turn into a Wolf!</p><p>God! Was that what Billy had meant?! They'd be watching! But if that was the case, then there was Wolves in the Tribe already.</p><p>Something inside of her whispered, <em>Sam.</em></p><p>Sam and his little gang of friends who ran around allergic to shirts. Jacob, who got sick and was avoiding her.</p><p>Called Alice a leech.</p><p>She shuddered out a sigh. This was Jacob's fault really. The guy had shot himself in the foot twice without even knowing it when he'd shared those stories with her. Not that Bella was going to complain, though the Quileute Elders might not have too many kind things to say on the matter.</p><p>"Alright, so whose idea was the pocket flame thrower?" Bella decided to take one thing at a time, and that other thing? The one that was some how a bit worst than the mini arson set she'd just been gifted? That was for Carlisle.</p><p>Jasper finally went back to his duty of looking out on the Denalis as they continued to make actual army lines of snowmen,</p><p>"Technically it was a passing fancy of mine when we stopped for gas on our way up to Seattle."</p><p>"And it didn't quite just pass because of Alice?" Bella couldn't help her incredulous tone at the thought of Jasper seeing the two separate items and in his very horrible state of self loathing thought of giving it to Bella as 'Vampire Mace'. Only for his wife to tell him what a GREAT idea it would be.</p><p>Honestly, there was something about that which seemed a bit ridiculous, yet horrifying all the same.</p><p>Jasper shook his head and genuinely radiated amusement as if it was a fond memory or something which was even weirder, but Bella supposed it really wasn't any of her business as he informed her,</p><p>"Just keep it on you, Alice says it'll bring good luck."</p><p>"And if I've learned anything you shouldn't bet against her," Bella chuckled, she couldn't help it as Jasper just nodded and it was good.</p><p>He even provided a bit of commentary on the snowman competition, until it was time for her to take her plate back inside. A fact that Bella took as a sign that they'd be alright.</p><p>She was pretty sure of it.</p><p>In the end Jasper's prediction had be right.</p><p>Kate and Irina won the snowman war with flourish and enthusiasm.</p><p>It was funny.</p><p>Bella had enjoyed the little moments she'd had so far, even with her regret and need to talk to Charlie buzzing beneath her skin like a thousand angry ants marching off to war. The only thing which could sate them were words of reconciliation with her father. She wished she could share this with him.</p><p>This place of ease and awe.</p><p>Later, Carlisle would called it desert magic, and it truly was. A powerful spell which fell over your soul and made things look so easy. Everything was so much easier with nothing around you but distance and vast emptiness. You could just let everything else slip past forever, no notion of time save for the seasons.</p><p>Even then, in the snow covered landscape, that could only be judged by daylight hours and if you never slept? Well all of that might become background noise.</p><p>It was such an interesting way of life...</p><p>The Denali were a family in every way that mattered. It was amusing to think that the Cullens were technically more nuclear. Wasn't that something? A nuclear family of Vampires where the mother was the youngest.</p><p>Bella found she didn't mind it.</p><p>Not anymore.</p><hr/><p>On Wednesday Bella was bamboozled, absolutely taken completely by a scam.</p><p>Kate and Irina were hustlers, Bella couldn't help but feel like a bit of a fool.</p><p>The two Vampire women had taken a bit too much of an interest in her. They weren't exactly as horrifically blatant as the immature population of Forks High, but Bella also gave them leeway because she was a brand new relative and her existence would actually effect theirs.</p><p>So when Irina offered billiards lessons in their game room and claimed, "We'll make it like a mini girl's night."</p><p>Bella had thought that meant it would be an hour or so of all the ladies hanging out while Carlisle, Eleazar, and Jasper made themselves scarce. She didn't think the 'mini' part was referring to the fact that the only people playing pool would be Kate, Irina, and Bella herself.</p><p>The fact was, she had half a mind to turn around and flee, but Bella was made of sterner stuff than that.</p><p>Besides, Kate and Irina weren't Jessica Stanley or Lauren Mallory with their desperate grasping motivations. These were beloved relatives of Bella's own family. They meant well even if their means were a bit suspect.</p><p>So as Bella stood there in the billiards room with only the two blonde Vampires for company, she took a breath, put her good hand on her hip, and declared,</p><p>"You know next time you just want the three of us to hang out you could just say so. The whole subterfuge thing wasn't necessary."</p><p>Kate and Irina shared a look that seemed a bit at a loss, but Bella was grateful when the former replied a bit apologetically,</p><p>"Sorry, we know you want to spend time with Jasper and Alice but since Carlisle hardly ever leaves your side, it was bit difficult for us to get a bit of girls time in with you."</p><p>"And with us being the only two Un-Bonded members of our Coven, it would be a little weird to attempt a couples activity," Irina added in a tone which actually sounded a bit miffed to Bella's own ears. She wondered how old they were.</p><p>If they had been waiting a very long time to fiind their own Mates or were just a bit jealous and feeling a bit left out.</p><p>"Well, as suspicious as the circumstances are... I'm still up for a bit of pool," Bella sighed as she tried to puzzle out the two women. Both of them were indeed beautiful with champagne colored tresses, but Kate had more long and slender face and her hair was straight. Irina though, had a strong handsomely square jaw with much wavier locks framing her high cheek bones,</p><p>"Though with my busted hand I don't know how well I'll do."</p><p>"You'll be fine!" Kate smiled a bit too brightly and fluttered her eyes as she grabbed one of the pool stick things and tossed it to Bella lightly,</p><p>"This is a cue!"</p><p>Or a cue apparently...</p><p>Which Bella attempted to catch one handed, for obvious reasons, and failed miserably which had Irina snorting as she covered her mouth looking more than just a bit apologetic over her outburst.The stick clattered uselessly and Bella simply gave them both a smile,</p><p>"Welcome to my variety show, this is pretty standard."</p><p>With neither of them willing to reply, Bella just a bit awkwardly bent down and grabbed the cue from where it had rolled across the floor, "What's next then?"</p><p>Kate and Irina took turns explaining how to make a shot and which balls went in what order while sharing rather odd glances with each other. Bella got the very unique feeling that they had no idea what to do with her now that they had her. It was almost unbearable.</p><p>Almost.</p><p>Because when Bella was trying her first shot out she mustered up all her courage to ask, "So, what do you two like to do? Besides tricking people with horribly mangled hands into playing pool?"</p><p>Neither of them seemed to realize she was joking but they moved passed it as Kate sort of awkwardly replied, "The normal things, dancing in clubs, watching movies, going into town for events.</p><p>"Sometimes we even bring a guy or two home."</p><p>Right.</p><p>Carlisle had told her that the Un-Bonded members of the Denali Coven enjoyed the company of Human men on occasion, "You must have some pretty amazing self control, I mean... To be able to be with a Human without them noticing you're different or even y'know, breaking anything."</p><p>"Or draining them dry," Irina said the words plainly as if she expected the Human to be appalled by the fact that they were Vampires when Bella herself was spending every night in bed with one.</p><p>"That too, but I didn't want to be rude," Bella smiled and attempted her first shot.</p><p>It was awful.</p><p>"Well with lots of trial and lots of error we've gotten to the point that it's relatively easy so long as we've fed," Kate very easily began adjusting Bella's form which was likely atrocious,</p><p>"I figure you know that though, what with Carlisle going hunting practically every morning."</p><p>Bella turned to look at her but only saw a bit of a licentious grin on her face, as if they were gal pals and this was the beginning of a juicy gossip session.</p><p>Great.</p><p>She managed a rather lack luster break that time but Irina was happy to inform her it would be much better once Bella's hand was healed and she didn't have to baby it.</p><p>"So, what about you? What do you like to do?" Kate pulled the conversation away from the more intimate topics.</p><p>"Well when I was little I used to want to be a ballet dancer," Bella found herself confessing it rather easily then, as Irina reset the balls for the Human's next attempt,</p><p>"I was never quite coordinated enough to get it down so I turned to books, I tend to prefer nights in with a cup of tea and a classic to going out on the town,</p><p>"I do enjoy going to the movies, though it has to be with the right people."</p><p>It was the most she'd ever shared about herself so openly and quickly and Bella nearly felt like she was standing there naked in front of two strangers. Even worse the whole house had probably heard it very easily.</p><p>"I love dancing!" Irina practically cheered as she removed the rack from the balls, "Perhaps, if you wish... I could teach you a little when you are a bit more..."</p><p>"Yeah," Bella found herself sighing the word. It was so strange to just have people know. That one day she would no longer be Human,</p><p>"That would be nice, I won't be able to take proper classes for a while and getting taught by you would probably keep me from going stir crazy."</p><p>They were nice.</p><p>A bit stand offish, but Bella wasn't one to judge such behavior. Not when she herself was the kind to shrink back from strangers. Sure, whenever Bella mentioned her Mate, they both got a bit of a sly grin but she figured that had more to do with the fact that Carlisle had apparently been a solitary being for most of his life.</p><p>She hadn't realized that.</p><p>Not until he was confessing how he too ripped himself opened constantly for her did Bella realize that he had likely been even more lonely that she first believed. Kate and Irina supported that theory as they almost treated Bella as if they were intimidated.</p><p>By what she couldn't know.</p><p>But it showed especially when Kate had asked, "When do you plan on making the Change?"</p><p>"We've decided to wait until I'm the same apparent age as Carlisle," Bella confessed it out loud for the first time to someone else that wasn't a Cullen and it almost felt mischievous.</p><p>Irina didn't appear too pleased but instead of saying anything negative she observed, "I suppose living among Humans would be easier that way. With you being younger it would look strange."</p><p>"Right," Kate pursed her lips a bit and Bella wondered why they didn't quite approve of the choice to wait. Perhaps they thought she was merely playing games?</p><p>"I just want to be their mother to everyone, everywhere," Bella explained and saying it so plainly lit up her chest like a sun going supernova,</p><p>"I never want anyone to question who I am to any of our children."</p><p>She realized then, that was the first time she herself had ever referred to all of the kids as her's.</p><p>"So you're actually going to be their mother," Irina appeared a bit surprised by that and Bella was beginning to feel a little wrong footed.</p><p>"Yes, but only if they don't mind," Bella shrugged bit she tried to keep in nonchalant but Kate's eyes were shimmering oddly as she heaved out a delicate sigh but said nothing.</p><p>"Now, since you asked, I get to! When did you both Change?"</p><p>Irina laughed then, perhaps at the sudden audacity she was showing, or in realization that Bella was trying to make the atmosphere which had built a bit less awkward, whatever it was though the woman replied,</p><p>"I'm the youngest. Though Kate and Tanya predate me by only century. All of us were born sometime after 1000 A.D."</p><p>"Birthday's weren't' really kept track of in the same manner back in those days," Kate added pulling herself from whatever reverie she had lost herself to with that sigh,</p><p>"The three of us share a Sire, though Tanya was blood related to her as her Great Niece. Irina and I were changed for our resemblance to her, so that Tanya could have sisters."</p><p>That was something wasn't it? To gather children for yourself based on their resemblance. Bella found it a bit odd, but who was she to judge a woman who was not present to defend herself?</p><p>It was also rather mind blowing to hear they were so old, so much older than even Carlisle.</p><p>"That's incredible, that you've all stayed together after all this time," Bella found she couldn't hold back her awe,</p><p>"It must be amazing to have each other, and know each other so well."</p><p>They both smiled again, and their easiness returned as they shared a glance.</p><p>For the rest of their time together the sister shared a few anecdotes about their many years together. Tales of painting entire cities red with Tanya, as well as a few 'newer' ones which Involved Esme and Carmen.</p><p>Accounts of chasing men down an entire street at human speed because the idiot thought he could get fresh with one of them. Regaling Bella easily as they spoke of whirlwind tours Europe and Asia.</p><p>It was practically enrapturing to hear them talk about all the things they'd seen, all the fun they'd had together. Bella hoped dearly that one day she'd have just as many tales to share.</p><p>When the evening crept up on her Bella was tired from spending so much time socializing but in no way was she exhausted as she made her way into the room she was sharing with Carlisle.</p><p>The man himself was sitting in bed wearing a t-shirt and his cotton briefs, reading a book. The sight of him waiting for her was enough to cause Bella's heart to race as she ambled over to him in order to plant a kiss on his cheek.</p><p>"You had a good time then?"</p><p>"It was great," Bella sighed a bit and tried to focus on the fun and not the few moments of strained conversation where they had all been attempting to get to know each other,</p><p>"I'm gonna take a shower alright?"</p><p>Carlisle hummed his agreement before stretching up to give Bella soft peck on the lips, one she sighed into without difficulty. Pulling away, she entered the bathroom so that she could clean up.</p><p>It was slow going with one hand but she'd mastered the art so she couldn't complain too much. The water washing over her, as well as the knowledge tha Carlisle was waiting for her in bed looking so attractive was enough to reinvigorate her just so.</p><p>But the time she finished washing the grit and grime of the day away, Bella realized it was Wednesday.</p><p>They had already been in Alaska for 3 full days and only had 2 more at most.</p><p>Taking a deep breath, the girl pulled on her bath robe, removed her hand covering so she could dress it up. Bella looked at herself in the mirror and closed her eyes.</p><p>2 days.</p><p>Opening them she got to work drying herself as well as her hair and while that also took some time it was worth it not to catch a chill when she went to bed later.</p><p>Instead of dressing into the nightwear she had laid out for herself earlier, Bella grit her teeth.</p><p>2 days.</p><p>Then she wrapped herself into that sapphire blue kimono that Tanya had gifted her before walking out of the bathroom. Carlisle turned to her as he placed his book on the nightstand and she felt a wave of smugness as he raked his topaz eyes up and down her body.</p><p>Clearly surprised that she was not in her nightdress, his eyes wide, lips parted, "Isabella?"</p><p>Barely jostling the mattress, Bella sat herself down on the edge of the bed, right next to where Carlisle's hip was located. She gave him a bit of a smile,</p><p>"So yesterday I found out that Jacob's probably a Shape-Shifting Wolf and Jasper kind of confirmed it. Jacob was the one who told me, I'd just been so focused on the part about you that I'd just let it rot away in the corner of my brain until now."</p><p>He clearly hadn't expected that and his rather deer in the headlights expression made her laugh, it was so out of place but perfect,</p><p>"I'm trying to say that you don't have to hide that from me anymore. I know."</p><p>"The Treaty forbids us from revealing them," Carlisle confessed, finally seeming to catch up to what was happening, "Though by tradition you were made a member of my Coven the moment you accepted me, the Quileutes would only see you as Human.</p><p>"They are not bound by Vampiric custom, after all. I would have told you, I know you have worried much about your friend."</p><p>"Thank you, for explaining though, without really explaining," Bella ducked her head, feeling a bit foolish as she sat there in nothing but a thin silken robe, but wasn't that what relationships were sometimes? Being a bit silly and awkward but doing it anyways because it was the right thing to do?</p><p>To talk.</p><p>"I wish I could have done better," Carlisle sighed and Bella could see the regret in his eyes, "They are not the only Shape-Shifters of the world."</p><p>Carlisle sat up straighter so he was no longer so casually leaning against the headboard, but he was within kissing range as he informed her,</p><p>"I could have tried to tell you about the Panther-Men of the Rain forests along the Rio De Janeiro, the Hawk Women of Europe or the Snake Tribes of Asia.</p><p>"Many people who have kept the magic of their ancestors alive to preserve themselves against the dark creatures who still roam the earth."</p><p>"Like Vampires," Bella sighed and Carlisle said nothing but his eyes agreed with her completely. It was enough.</p><p>Before she lost her determination, Bella climbed onto him as quickly as she could manage, her actions were clearly welcome as Carlisle laid himself back against the headboard once more to allow her better positioning as she straddled her Mate's hips.</p><p>It was exhilarating as she sat a top him, nothing between them but his own boxers as Bella leaned down and began kissing his neck, all of her desire and desperation for him beginning to swell almost frantically. Trying to keep her head just a little, Bella slid her good hand up his shirt, feeling the definition of his toned stomach.</p><p>Against her lips she could feel his throat work as he swallowed, Carlisle's hands found her thighs as he gasped out, "Bella slow down, what are you doing?"</p><p>"I want you," Bella confessed her intentions. 2 days wasn't enough, she needed him and there would hardly be another golden opportunity for their first time for a very long while.</p><p>Immediately she halted as he choked out, "Isabella no, you're emotionally turmoiled and are likely fearing our separation if Charlie decides not to come to terms with the situation."</p><p>Bella sat up trying to keep her heart from racing and failing as she fully sat on him, "You're wrong.</p><p>"I've made my choice already. I'm ready to do everything for Charlie, but the one thing I won't do is stop seeing you.</p><p>"That's what the cottage is for."</p><p>Carlisle was staring at her then, wide eyed as if he couldn't believe how calmly she replied to his denial. As if he hadn't expected her to have already decided so easily.</p><p>"The fact is we have a sound proof room for 2 more days and its the only time we'll be able to have the privacy of no one knowing what we're getting up to for a very long time.</p><p>"There's no way in hell that Charlie's going to let me and you have a weekend trip to Seattle in a Hotel and all the kids are going to know exactly what's going on if we kick them out of the house.</p><p>"I want you, I've wanted you for a very long time and I'm ready. I know what this is going to mean to you, to our family.</p><p>"There's nothing I want more than to be your's forever, I never want anything to break what we have, not even Death."</p><p>"Dear Lord," Carlisle whispered and in that moment he grabbed hold of her softly and picked her up off the bed. Gently Bella's back hit the mattress as he laid her down sweetly and her robe began falling opened, revealing what she'd already known to the man laying opened mouth kisses like wild fire down her neck,</p><p>"Say it, Isabella say the words."</p><p>"Carlisle I want us to try having sex, I know you won't hurt me and you'll stop if I ask."</p><p>And he gave in.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0019"><h2>19. Chapter 19</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>This is a straight up love scene for the entire chapter. I don't think it's Explicit because I dance around a lot of the details but if even one of you thinks it is I'll change the rating. </p><p>Welp, now that I've said that:</p><p>Alexa, play 'Iris' By the Goo Goo Dolls</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Bella could feel her heart pounding like a feral creature attempting to claw it's way out of her chest as Carlisle sat back on his haunches and stared down at her completely bare form.</p><p>His mouth was open is such unadulterated awe that she wondered at what he was seeing as the blatant appreciation of her body caused her to blush and squirm just a little nervously. That was quickly replaced with confusion as Carlisle very carefully peeled his own shirt off before completely removing himself from the bed like a shot.</p><p>Immediately, Bella sat up and frowned, her nerves had begun turning into a slight panic at the sudden abandonment. Had she been wrong? Had he not been as ready as she herself had been for what seemed like eons?</p><p>"Carlisle? Is everything alright?"</p><p>She didn't need to leave the bed as he was standing in the middle of their borrowed suite, not breathing, moving, or really anything at all as his hands were up in the universal signs for <em>'wait a second'</em>.</p><p>"If we're going to attempt this I don't want to take any risks with you," Carlisle sighed out and to her ears it sounded like a wild thing which was climbing the walls of it's cage,</p><p>"I may not be able to impregnate you, but the amount of Venom that will be coming in contact with your internal organs isn't the most advisable.</p><p>"It's one thing for us to kiss and for you to ingest what is merely a fraction of a teaspoon but this is going to be a much less negligible quantity."</p><p>"We don't have condoms," Bella swallowed hard and was beginning to feel this was never going to happen but Carlisle only appeared before her in a flash, then stroked her face gently as his eyes once more roved her bare form. It was nerve wracking to be completely vulnerable to him, laid out and wanting.</p><p>"We do, I-," Carlisle took a deep breath then and sort of gave a nervous laugh, "Our hostesses have been a bit too accommodating and there are a variety in my clothing drawer."</p><p>Closing her eyes Bella tried not to feel the horror at that, it was sort of fortunate for them, but really it was more than slightly embarrassing. Though, she knew she shouldn't be ashamed, it was just new and a bit terrifying.</p><p>"Alright, anything else?"</p><p>Carlisle was suddenly over by his dresser and pulling out not just a packet but the whole box before he rushed back to her placed it as well as small handful of foil packets on the nightstand.</p><p>He turned to her, his face grave but Bella could see him practically trembling as his skin nearly rippled from the force of it,</p><p>"You need to tell me if I'm hurting you, even just a little. It would be horrific if I tore something inside of you, I couldn't- It wouldn't- Bella you have to make sure to tell to me regardless of how small it seems."</p><p>She couldn't help the fidgeting she did as she slowly began to shimmy out of her silk robe. Biting her lip nervously Bella reminded herself if she couldn't talk about it she probably shouldn't be doing it,</p><p>"Isn't it supposed to hurt? Even just a little bit at first."</p><p>"Oh, no Bella," Carlisle pressed his forehead to hers and Bella felt vulnerable in a way that she never had ever imagined was possible, as if he'd touched her down to the very marrow,</p><p>"It is one of the greatest Cons of very selfish men to have fooled so many young girls into thinking it needs to hurt and be bloody."</p><p>A cool gentle hand cupped her neck as he began laying chilled kisses on her shoulder, "Trust me, I'm a Doctor. It will be uncomfortable initially and perhaps there will be a light sting if your Hymen is still intact as well as particularly thick.</p><p>"But otherwise, as long as I ensure you are pleasured and truly prepared, it will simply only be slightly distressing , at first, from the lack of use your muscles have had until now."</p><p>"Oh," Bella sighed out as the man pulled away a once more, feeling the loss she watched him head towards their small closet, "That's good."</p><p>A smile then broke out across her face as she began feeling a little less self conscious with her exposure as Carlisle pulled out her heater. With a light, if shy smile, he explained,</p><p>"Just in case you find yourself uncomfortable from the chill."</p><p>Bella felt calmer then.</p><p>This was Carlisle, and he loved her. Her nervousness drifted from that tinge of fear of embarrassment and bungling things up, shifting instead towards eagerness.</p><p>Slowly, he approached the bed and just before reaching it, Bella watched as this man she loved so dearly tucked his thumbs into the waist band of his boxers and half eagerly, half shyly pulled them down his thighs, allowing them to drop down to the floor.</p><p>Her breath hitched as she took him in completely as he had done to her just moments before. His desire for her already beginning to strain itself into full excitement and Bella forced herself to tear her eyes from it so she could look Carlisle in the eye.</p><p>Standing before her, he was everything.</p><p>Forever in his eyes, starlight in his bones, paradise in his mouth and Carlisle Cullen was more than perfect.</p><p>She felt the mattress dip as he knelt at the foot of the bed. Crawling towards her like something desperate.</p><p>With a gentle nudge, he spread her thighs as he lumbered over her like a panther, she began to lean back into the soft bedding, her head landed on the pillow with little fuss and Bella tried to keep herself from trembling as Carlisle's hands once more began running themselves over her body making that hot coiled spring inside her begin tightening.</p><p>His own straining passion for her hovered dangerously close to the junction of Bella's thighs as Carlisle began to carefully make love to Bella's flesh. He kissed her neck first , leaving a trail of kisses on the swell of her breast, daring to taste her and touch her softly as her desire for more grew like a tidal wave within.</p><p>All she could do was try her best to keep breathing steadily while attempting to bring Carlisle his own pleasure. Very determinedly Bella began to feel him, marble like flesh freezing compared to the rising temperature of her own excited very Human skin.</p><p>They had done this part of the dance before, languished in it like kids touching in the dark clumsily until they had grown to know what the other preferred so as Carlisle kissed her belly, Bella allowed herself to feel no shame as small keening noises escaped her throat, all while her fingers threaded into his honey blond hair. Stroking his scalp in a way she knew made his chest rumble.</p><p>Then, his hands and wintry kisses went lower than he had ever dared before.</p><p>"Isabella, tell me how to touch you, tell me what you like," Carlisle's soft and tender voice was harsh with desire and it was enough to have every part of her quivering as his slender fingers began running their way along her thighs.</p><p>And she told him.</p><p>And she loved him as his cold icy digits began to caress her center gently, moving only as Bella commanded, guiding his every feather light touch until his perfect memory took over and Carlisle was able to bring something like electricity to life beneath her skin.</p><p>It was instinctual as she rocked her hips against the gentle ministrations of his hands, Bella couldn't help but hold tight to his golden tresses as she lost herself to him.</p><p>Then, in a moment where the world was quiet he reverently tasted her, and it was enough to have her crying out against his lips while they brought waves of sweet bliss careening through her like a hurricane. Something like a prayer ghosted against her core and Bella felt it not just in her veins like bottle lightening but the Bond in her chest exploded until it was ever expanding, too large for her tiny frail form to contain.</p><p>All she could do was writhe and thrash while chanting, "Carlisle, Carlisle, Carlisle." Over and over like a sacred prayer while her weak hand gripped harshly in his blond hair like a lifeline while he worked her.</p><p>It was easy to understand then. How he could break her as Bella was already losing herself to the feeling of white hot aching emptiness that was growing below her belly.</p><p>Carlisle murmured words of love and encouragement between his languid drinks of her, while his fingers kept on until Bella found her first sweet release.</p><p>Even then, he continued to gently bring her down from the sudden sharp blissful high of it..</p><p>Shivers moved through her like an earthquake. He was a natural disaster that Bella was glad to be swept up in as he once more crawled his path up her body. This time his eyes were black, pupils blown so wide that his iris was but a mere sliver of gold.</p><p>"How do you feel," Carlisle whispered, his lips brushing lightly against her own as Bella could smell herself on him and as she released her hold on his hair she ran her fingers downs his body.</p><p>It was then that she knew that forever would never be enough.</p><p>Not with him.</p><p>"Perfect," Bella smiled as she nuzzled their noses together, he looked how she felt and the only words she could find to describe it was love drunk,</p><p>"I'm ready, I want to feel you inside of me."</p><p>She feared he might shy away as Bella could feel her cheeks burning at her wanton desperation but Carlisle kissed her like a man dying allowing her to taste their mingled flavors and it caused that fire in her to renew. Carlisle then removed himself from her slightly to grab a small tinfoil package from the nightstand, making arrangements for her to be protected from his Venom.</p><p>With that task completed, he kissed her again and Bella felt more than saw then, as one of his broad hands took hold of her hip in an almost manic rush, but it was still kindly.</p><p>With his left hand braced above Bella's shoulder Carlisle pulled away from their kiss which had her gasping while the man once more pressed their foreheads together,</p><p>"You're going to do this Bella, I don't want to hurt you. Lift your hips."</p><p>Bella obeyed and she could feel him, his length pressing against her and Carlisle shifted his hips and she could feel him positioned perfectly as he nearly begged, voice thick with lust,</p><p>"Push against me, let me feel you Darling."</p><p>Using her elbows for leverage Bella took a breath and stared into his eyes, there was a burning wild fire in them that made her swallow hard as she took in how truly mad he appeared. His lips parted wide, hair tousled from her desperate clinging, and Bella realized in that moment that love was too small of a word.</p><p>Slowly, together they moved and Bella found her jaw dropping with the strain of it only for Carlisle's hand to move from her hip and down between them where they were meeting. It was easier then as her lover laid soft kisses along her jaw interspersed with tiny sounds of pleasure until their hips were flush together in an awkward strain.</p><p>Bella arched her back and let out a groan she could not hold back at the feel of him. It was so much!</p><p>She slid her hand around to his back as she made and attempt to ground herself in the moment and breathe, just breathe and get herself past the intensity of it. All while the pulsing heat in her chest had gone supernova, extending beyond her body the inky blackness at the edge of it crept in like the bleeding water colors of a painting but there was nothing but calmness to it.</p><p>Just cool comfort.</p><p>Carlisle's hand, no longer between them, had once more found a place on her thigh as Bella watched him. Jaw clenched so tightly that the muscle was twitching. The Vampire shook his head as if fighting back some mighty urge while his body trembled over her. The grip on her thigh grew tighter as they sat there attempting to get used to the fit of them.</p><p>It was shocking then when he released her leg and slammed his hand down on the mattress, his jaw dropping and she suddenly realized he wasn't even breathing.</p><p>"I'm ready," Bella rasped out and realized that her throat was tight and desperate for him as he struggled with his self control, "Move whenever you need too, I'm ready."</p><p>"I just, I-"</p><p>Carlisle shook his head again, still not breathing, likely using whatever air was left in his lungs from before, "I want to press myself against you and If I move I'll crush you."</p><p>Not one to be daunted by the idea of him being so much more powerful than her own delicate form, Bella took a breath trying to calm her pounding heart as well as the nearly over whelming feeling of the Bond exploding into some sort of neutron star.</p><p>Running her fingers lightly down his back she made her best attempt to sooth him, the poor desperate man who wanted her so badly it might just destroy her,</p><p>"It's alright, I've got you Carlisle, I have you."</p><p>It was almost madness but Bella swallowed hard as she asked, "Will it be alright if I move?"</p><p>Carlisle released something between a choking noise and a hiss as he nodded frantically, his blond hair flying wildly.</p><p>So, Bella laid herself on her elbows, planted her feet a bit more firmly on the bed and moved.</p><p>Above her Carlisle began practically seething as she worked herself awkwardly. It didn't feel the most pleasant as he was not made of flesh and she was unsure of how to go about it.</p><p>Bella couldn't take it, how could she move and squirm all at once on her back?! It was nearly impossible, but as she was about to ask for a shift in position she cried out in surprise.</p><p>Carlisle, using both his hands laid hold of her thighs and hitched them up higher before leaning over her, bracing himself on his elbows, then he began to thrust.</p><p>Crying out desperately Bella began appreciating it better, the feeling of him moving over her as she attempted to meet his undulating. Her blood was rushing like an ocean in her veins all while she cried out for him, her hand uselessly scrambling against his stomach until she managed to find some purchase by holding onto the back of his neck.</p><p>"Bella, Bella, Bella," Carlisle let out a in a litany like a desperate prayer in between noises of pleasure cut under a low rumbling sound in his chest and lungs.</p><p>They moved together like that, both keening and desperate, and Bella once again felt that hot tight ache building inside of her when Carlisle shifted, just so, it became accompanied by the sensation of a million fire works going off from the top of her head all the way down to her toes as she begged him not to shift again,</p><p>"Like that, don't stop, just like that Carlisle oh, God!"</p><p>She found her peak once more as she could feel her muscles working and Bella cried out in exquisite agony as she arched her back and found her bliss.</p><p>Carlisle though, he was still moving, chasing that impossible goal as he was once more gritting his teeth, Bella felt a guilt well up inside her as the Bond burned out cold completely like flash fire doused.</p><p>Helplessly she watch him as he whimpered and continued to move over her, stimulating her now oversensitive body in pursuit of completion. She felt like a light inside her was fading and Carlisle's eyes grew frantic while his right hand suddenly began slamming over and over on the mattress as if he was attempting to release a desperate rage.</p><p>"Please! Please! I need you, Bella I need you."</p><p>She realized then that strange weightless sensation she was experiencing was linked to Carlisle's desperation.</p><p>Because if he didn't the Bond wouldn't Establish Fully.</p><p>"Cum for me, please I need you," Bella cried back her own longing feeding his frenzied state.</p><p>Distantly, as Carlisle hand slammed down one more time, Bella registered the sound of tearing but was too enraptured by the sight of her lover's jaw going slack in a strangled cry.</p><p>Eyes wide as he finally found his satisfaction inside of her.</p><p>Then, that cold empty washout in her chest <em>exploded.</em></p><p>Not with the familiar heat which she knew so well or that inky blackness which sometimes made itself known.</p><p>But as Carlisle pulled himself from her body and began gathering Bella up into his arms in an attempt to feel her skin, draw her even closer than he had been able to during their love making, that blackness had grown soft in texture.</p><p>Not longer was it thick or viscous, but like a vast cloud which consumed her entire body as well as Carlisle's. That light hadn't vanished either.</p><p>Instead of a single sun, Bella could feel a million tiny points of light spread out vast against the dark.</p><p>She waited for them to fade back to their former states but as Bella caught her breath, her heart calmed and Carlisle nuzzled her neck like he'd never let her go again it never did.</p><p>"It feels like the universe," Bella sighed and she felt so overwhelmed by it that she clung to him desperately, "Why is it like that?"</p><p>"Because our halves of the Bond are no longer separate things," his voice was distant as his cold hands continued to grasp at her,</p><p>"They never will be again."</p><p>Suddenly she was tired and Bella's eyes were drooping from the exertion of it all. Muscles she'd never used until that moment were beginning to feel tense in a way the girl was aware that meant they'd be sore in the morning,</p><p>"Good."</p><p>"You've made so happy," Carlisle sighed and placed a kiss on her shoulder where his face was tucked into her as they lay with her a top him, pressed together and holding tight as if a tidal wave was threatening to sweep them apart from each other.</p><p>"I love you," Bella informed him sleepily as her bones began to feel heavy, "I hope I can always make you happy."</p><p>"You will," Carlisle swore like an oath, it was heavy yet feather light all the same. As if him loving her was a truth etched into the universe that could not be revoked or altered,</p><p>"And I'll always endeavor to make you so."</p><p>Suddenly, with what felt like an entirely new galaxy in her very soul, Bella sighed out against his skin, "You're my home now I think. So that won't be too hard."</p><p>Closing her eyes, she found her self jostled a bit which caused her to frown and groan at her Vampiric pillow, "I'm trying to fall asleep."</p><p>"We need to clean up, it's not good to sit in a mess all night and it risks infections," Carlisle informed her but there was a lightness to his tone that Bella knew was coated in love. He was a Doctor and so she wasn't going to argue. Thus, with wobbly legs she sort of rolled off of him and stood up.</p><p>She found him watching her clearly amused from his place on the bed and Bella realized his arousal had not retreated though he'd reached climax.</p><p>"Can you seriously go again?" it came out as a bit of an exhausted and disbelieving groan but Carlisle got to his feet, not even weary in the least because of his biology.</p><p>"I don't get tired Isabella," he smiled and it carried so much mischief and promise Bella's own interest was sparked.</p><p>"That's something," Bella's brain was a bit frazzled still though and only later would she realize that, when the time came, they could technically go at it forever and never quit.</p><p>And wasn't that something to look forwards to?</p><p>She spent the night in Carlisle's arms with her heater going. It was almost exactly like every night before but the Bond settled between them and Bella could practically feel him in every small twinkle of each star as the sound echoed across the vast fathomless space in between in a song only they would ever know.</p><p>A smile played on her face, even as she dreamed, as Bella Swan sunk into the beautiful comfort of her new found state.</p><p>In the morning Carlisle would make sweet love to her again.</p><p>And for the rest of their two days they'd explore each other, find what the other needed as well as how to satisfy it.</p><p>Additionally, to Carlisle's clear embarrassment and Bella's mortification, apologized to Esme for tearing her mattress while Irina was practically crying laughing in the living room.</p><p>Bella was finally his and Carlisle was at long last her's.</p><p>No matter the distance or time, Bella Swan and Carlisle Cullen would never be torn asunder. No matter the circumstance or cost they would always know that the other was out there, living, searching for a way back.</p><p>By all standards of Vampiric custom she was Carlisle's wife.</p><p>On their last night together in Alaska, they took a break so as not to strain her Human body, but Carlisle had stroked Bella's hair and whispered,</p><p>"Now, you are legally a Vampire in the eyes of the Volturi. You have the rights to know all that we know and have what we have. No Human in Volterra or a serving family could disrespect you and our children will not be looked down on for bowing to your wills."</p><p>"Why?" Bella tilted her head as well as she could again the pillow it rested on. They faced each other and the comfort between them had only grown,</p><p>"I mean, why would the Volturi recognize any Human like that? I mean... Bite first and all..."</p><p>Carlisle smiled at her as if he thought she was the most wonderful thing and Bella couldn't help but privately return the sentiment that he was truly everything.</p><p>"Sometimes, there are extenuating circumstances where a Mate can't be changed. Say they have a congenital heart defect, the transformation would be too much for them, their heart would stop and death would take them before immortality could be reached," Carlisle explained it softy and Bella couldn't help but think such a thing tragic.</p><p>To find someone only to never even have the choice of forever with them.</p><p>Making the most of what time you had was clearly the best option, and she understood, "That's... That's really sad."</p><p>"I know," he agreed and kissed her forehead, Bella felt grateful then, that she had been blessed with so much. Time, a family, and so much love it was hardly even quantifiable.</p><p>"Well, with those cases a heart transplant would likely be the best route, even then it would be risky," Carlisle sort of mused on the matter and Bella wondered at his mind. A Doctor through and through.</p><p>"What other limits are there? On being changed?"</p><p>"Age, besides the cut off at children, adults passed a particular age are too fragile to survive the stress," he moved his hand from where it was caressing her hair down her back until it rested a bit too happily on her rear,</p><p>"A Human body could suffer too much damage for the Venom to repair, though it is in some ways miraculous, there are limits.</p><p>"I intend on not needing to take such risks with you."</p><p>Bella surged forwards and renewed her claim over his lips and together they moved with familiarity. When she pulled away Bella sighed,</p><p>"I love you, and if something ever happens to me, even if I'm not the right age I won't mind you doing it."</p><p>"I know," Carlisle closed his eyes slowly, his face growing something close to serene, "But I thank you for the permission."</p><p>There were a thousand things still.</p><p>Leah's inability to answer her phone and Angela's clear but silent disapproval of Bella's relationship with Carlisle. That on top of the possible blooming relationship Leah and Angela might or might not have.</p><p>The conversation with Charlie that was pending and how everything was about to change because of their Full Mating.</p><p>Yet,none of those issues altered the fact that in that moment, Bella was completely and incandescently happy.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>This is the longest love scene I'll ever detail out because it's their first time and ALSO the bond being Fully Established, all the others will be even more vague and less detailed.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0020"><h2>20. Chapter 20</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>You're grounded for 'til college</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>On Saturday morning, Bella precariously sat on the edge of the tub and as she shaved her legs and reminded herself that it was a good thing. They couldn't bubble themselves in Alaska forever and she would be going back to Charlie. She owed him so much and hadn't exactly repaid that recently with her behavior.</p><p>Absently Bella rinsed her razor under the low running water and sighed before grabbing a rinse cup which she used to rinse whatever stray shaving cream was left on her legs before turning the knob off.</p><p>Slowly she climbed out of the bath and made her way into the suite she was sharing with Carlisle through the already opened door. He was sort of busying himself by very swiftly packing all their belongings with the exception of the outfit Bella has set out for herself already.</p><p>In the middle of his buzzing about Carlisle stopped, wrapped an arm around her and with an easy smile planted kiss onto her lips which Bella was more than glad to return.</p><p>Sex hadn't really changed them.</p><p>Part of her wondered if that was how it should have been. In her head it seemed right, that the only thing that felt magical was the fact that Carlisle had gone Hunting on Thursday morning and that starlight space inside of her hadn't altered in any way. It's rhythm was sure and steady as if he were by her side.</p><p>Otherwise Bella felt the same as always when Carlisle held her and or kissed her.</p><p>"It's too early for the Human to be alive right now," Bella allowed herself a small huff as they parted and Carlisle released her so that he could zip up his luggage.</p><p>"There is a 4 hour plane ride you will  have a perfect opportunity to sleep on," he reminded her easily and Bella knew that, she was simply tired but Carlisle was Carlisle and was just being his normal helpful self which had her feeling a bit warmed with affection.</p><p>"Has Alice complained to you about us ruining Ice Skating yet? She says the whole things vanished," Bella informed him of the bit of information that had their daughter a bit miffed over the whole thing.</p><p>Privately she wondered if there was even a future where they told Charlie and he actually allowed Bella to go to Seattle with them for a whole day because if that was the case, it sounded like they'd gotten the shortest stick possible.</p><p>Reminding herself it didn't matter and it didn't do to dwell Bella just shoved it away as she slid out of her bathrobe and began dressing into her clothes for the day. Bell knew Alice hated it, but their whole stay in Alaska she'd been wearing her own sets of baggy shirts and frumpy hoodies with comfy washed out jeans.</p><p>It was sort of funny because she was pretty sure Alice wasn't actually angry.</p><p>At least Bella didn't think she was.</p><p>"We sort of expected that," Carlisle observed as he shouldered Bella's bag while also grabbing his own, an action she'd complain about if her hand wasn't so useless. At some point Bella had ended up with what she considered the 'original' Carlisle scarf with the tied off tassels while he wore the embroidered one,</p><p>"Perhaps we can reschedule it for when the situation improves."</p><p>Bella offered him a smile in agreement before she reached out and took his hand in her good one before they began making their way down the stairs to join Alice and Jasper where they were saying their goodbyes to their cousins.</p><p>When the couple reached the middle landing Bella could hear their voices chatting away and Carlisle informed her a bit oddly as if he himself wasn't sure how to feel about it, "It seems we are to have company."</p><p>She didn't understand until they reached the bottom of the stairs and found Kate and Irina with their own luggage beaming like it was Christmas and New Years all at once.</p><p>"Oh, well this is gonna be awkward," Bella sort of blurted as she thought of them returning with two absolute drop dead gorgeous blonde women the same age as Carlisle only to have them shack up in his house. While his 18 year old girlfriend was going to be all but forbidden to see him.</p><p>"We'll be staying in Port Angeles," Kate informed her smoothly as if she'd picked up exactly what Bella was putting down,</p><p>"The easy distance means we'll be able to help when called on but won't put a strain on the... "</p><p>She trailed and Bella closed her eyes, holding back a snort as Irina completed a bit stiltedly, "Situation."</p><p>"You shouldn't," Bella shook her head a bit more than bothered by their decision, "I mean, I know you mean well but I don't think it would be right to drag any of you into my mess.</p><p>"It's bad enough that I have to rely on the kids."</p><p>Before she would have been angry about her own shortcomings. Her Humanity was a Gift Carlisle treasured at the moment so Bella did her best to remind her self of that fact.</p><p>"Well tough luck," Irina scoffed but it wasn't exactly mean spirited, more smugly cheery, "We're coming whether you like it or not Auntie Bella."</p><p>Closing her eyes in horror at the nickname Bella groaned out a quiet "Oh my God."</p><p>Alice squealed while Carlisle buried his face into her hair where she could feel him smiling like like it was going out of style. In the end she wasn't their mother and Carlisle wasn't about to reject a a few extra hands so Bella sort of backed down as gracefully as she could and thanked them for their kindness.</p><p>Despite Bella's own reluctance to accept them risking their lives to help someone they'd only known a few days.</p><p>With that sort of settled, Bella gave her own goodbyes to Esme, Carmen and Eleazar, since Tanya would be driving her sisters to the airport, that farewell was to be done later. Though something strange transpired when Eleazar shook her hand and once more kissed it in his gentlemanly way.</p><p>For he didn't only say his piece but added, "And I cannot wait to see you Changed, you will make quite a Striking Immortal."</p><p>The words had caused her entire family to stiffen, and Carlisle's tone was bordering on concerned as he asked, "Eleazar, my friend, I am sure Bella appreciates the compliment but we were not aware of any particular..."</p><p>He trailed off as if attempting to find the correct words, "Traits which would make her so."</p><p>Bella tried her best not to be offended at that. Carlisle had always called her beautiful and never spared his opinions on her, so he definitely had a reason to be protesting the fact that she'd be 'striking' or whatever.</p><p>Perhaps it was some sort of code?</p><p>Jasper provided a bit of insight, "Actually, Edward's never been able to read her, so that's probably what Eleazar's sensing?"</p><p>"I'm lost," Bella very happily informed them as they all seemed content to talk around her. Carlisle of course sighed. She raked her mind for information about Eleazar and only found his introduction to her. He'd seemed seemed more keen on catching up with Carlisle than showing interest in Bella herself.</p><p>So she knew his name, of course, and his Gift to see and understand the Gifts of other Vampires. On the surface it wasn't as impressive as Kate's, who was able to run an electrical current of untold voltage over her skin, but it was a very valuable skill that had many uses for information collecting.</p><p>"I mean, it's not like I'm a Vampire, I can't have a Gift like you all."</p><p>Eleazar a bit awkwardly trudged forwards with his own explanation, "Well, some Humans do show signs of such super natural powers and I can indeed see them, but my ability to do so varies depending on how powerful their Gift manifest in their mortal form.</p><p>"At first I had thought your Gift was simply weak but I realized around the middle of your stay that I was having a hard time simply because it was so powerful.</p><p>"I am quite surprised Jasper's functions on you and I would not be surprised if Kate's did nothing even now."</p><p>"I'm not understanding," Bella felt an odd churning nervousness in her stomach and Jasper looked at her a bit oddly as Eleazar looked at them all as if he wasn't sure how to explain. Carlisle pulled her slightly closer to himself as if his steady form could bring her calm and on some level it did.</p><p>Finally Eleazar settled for, "Your mind is very secure. It is almost like some sort of Shield."</p><p>"And you couldn't have said anything sooner?" Jasper was clearly a bit more disgruntled than usual as he took a step forward, and Bella turned to him surprised,</p><p>"Jasper, I'm sure Eleazar thought we knew. Especially since Edward can't read me."</p><p>The empath fell back a but didn't apologize. She wondered at that, if his protectiveness was born from what had happened between them. Could he really have been so effected by it that he'd lash out at his cousins for holding back on information? It was startling to say the least.</p><p>"Eleazar?" Carlisle prompted the other man, and the Vampire in question smiled but to Bella it appeared a little forced.</p><p>"Indeed, had I known that you hadn't realized this, I would have told you sooner than when you were making to depart from us," Eleazar's tone was light but it was Tanya who spoke up, ever the one in charge,</p><p>"I'm sure we'll all be spending more time together in the future and if Bella's Gift is latent, currently there is no real urgency to it's discovery."</p><p>It was true, that was something to worry about much much later. Like 5 years kind of later.</p><p>"In the meantime I suggest you take caution should you encounter other's of our Kind," Tanya's tone was truly concerned, so much so that Bella took her words to heart instantly as The Denali's leader advised,</p><p>"Not many will understand you waiting to Change her, some may even view it as a decision to test the Volturi."</p><p>Bella wondered at that. Carlisle had only just said that she was legally untouchable for knowing the secret because of their Established Bond, but he'd also claimed just after her birthday that most of the unions he'd heard of between Vampire men and Human women ended in their deaths....</p><p>It painted a gruesomely tragic picture of history.</p><p>She supposed there was no way to really prove they were Bonded though. The Cullens accepted it because Carlisle had claimed it, then it was the same for the Denalis. Wasn't that strange, no one had actually asked about the Bond. Bella recalled that when it had first manifested, and she was attempting to pry information from Jacob, something inside of her hand't wanted to talk about it.</p><p>Even now the thought of describing it more than she had to Edward that night in his car, it seemed too personal.</p><p>Private.</p><p>Carlisle and Bella agreed with Tanya that they would take due caution, on top of the already rather difficult circumstances, before all the Cullens loaded into the rental car. Irina, Kate, and Tanya piled into one of their vehicles as Tanya would be driving the car back home while her sisters flew onward to Seattle.</p><p>Finishing up their rounds of goodbyes, Alice and Jasper loaded into the backseat happily while Carlisle helped Bella into the passenger side before slipping behind the steering wheel and heading out at what had to be a new land speed record towards the airport.</p><p>As the house grew smaller in the mirror Bella ignored the fact that Carlisle was practically maxing out the speed on their rental, and in doing so she couldn't help but bring up the one thing that was still a bit confusing to her,</p><p>"So... 'Striking' is a Code Word for what? 'Having an Interesting Gift? Because in Human it means drop dead gorgeous and I'm pretty sure that's not what Eleazar meant."</p><p>She knew she was no prize and that, while Carlisle loved her dearly and treated her like she might just be the closest thing to Aphrodite, that was just his personal opinion.</p><p>Her Mate appeared thoughtful and Alice sort of giggled as Jasper hummed at the observation. Though Bella was happy that Carlisle was the one to reply,</p><p>"No. Eleazar meant precisely that. Though, I know that makes me sound rather cruel for denying it, you must understand that Vampiric Beauty standards are completely different to Human's.</p><p>"To me you will always be the most beautiful creature I have ever beheld, but Eleazar was judging you on a rubric outside of physical and emotional beauty."</p><p>That....</p><p>Made sense.</p><p>Bella couldn't imagine judging Vampire's attractiveness on how they looked when technically every single one of them had perfectly balanced features and were transformed into the peak of beauty for whatever race they happened to be.</p><p>Jasper was the one to clarify, "I don't mean to sound smug, but technically in our Coven at least, the most 'beautiful' members would be Edward and Alice. My Alice ranking Number One, easily."</p><p>Bell had twisted in her chair as the boy had begun to speak and couldn't fight the smile that broke out across her face as the two in the backseat shared a kiss.</p><p>"Jasper would be a close third," Carlisle added easily as if it was simply information he'd always known, the statement drew Bella's attention back to him,</p><p>"As his gift is incredibly useful, paired with his skill in battle I'd say some would rank him over Edward if that's where their tastes ran."</p><p>"This all sounds a bit..." Bella trailed off an didn't really know what to say in the face of it while not being offensive for sort of judging their culture but  Alice saved her as she chirped from her place snuggled with Jasper in the back,</p><p>"Shallow? Of course it is, we're talking about totally arbitrary beauty standards! I mean, Emmett and Rosalie love each other just as much as Jasper and I do but that's because we're compatible! We share interests but also have our own things.</p><p>"Sure, other Vampires might have opinions on how attractive we are but you're not about to run off with Edward because he's technically hotter than Carlisle.</p><p>"That would be stupid."</p><p>Bella couldn't help the laugh which bloomed and sprouted up from her stomach at the idea of it. She supposed that such a stance was reasonable. It wasn't as if people only fell in love with actors and models. After all, it was one thing to appreciate those features and something else entirely to pursue them outside everything else.</p><p>"So," Bella couldn't help it as she bit her lip and beamed a bit too widely at her sort of brand new lover as butterflies danced in her stomach before she teased,</p><p>"Tell me Dr. Cullen, what traits of yours are considered 'Conventionally Attractive' by Vampire standards?"</p><p>Carlisle tossed her a bit of saucy look meaning he knew exactly what she was doing, the fact only stirred the pot as Bella began to chuckle at his slight reluctance. With Jasper and Alice remaining ominously quiet in the back it appeared no one would save him.</p><p>"Well..." he started with a sigh but Bella could tell it was amused rather than actually put upon, almost as if he'd rather be having this conversation in private but was trudging forwards anyways,</p><p>"My Coven is the second largest in the world and since I have so many talented children, we possess the equivalent of a Vampire Strike force.</p><p>"Because of this we've maintained a cordial relationship with the Volturi to assure them that we have no plans outside of living peacefully among Humans.</p><p>"On my own I am nothing very special."</p><p>Bella covered her mouth as her mind, for some strange and horrible reason brought up Jessica's words from the very first time she had ever heard about Carlisle Cullen and his children,</p><p>"So you're the 'Vampire Boy Next Door' except for the fact that you have a literal army of children."</p><p>That had Jasper chortling while Alice joined him with her own high pitched giggles. Carlisle too appeared amused by her break down as his only response was to sigh out in a facetious tone,</p><p>"You have such a way with words Darling."</p><p>Delight at the situation rose tenfold as Bella tried to contain her absolute mirth at the situation though, there was no hiding it from Jasper. It was absurd to think of Carlisle as the<em> average</em> one in their relationship, that was, if Eleazar was to be believed.</p><p>It had tickled her so much that Bella couldn't help but blurt out, "I can't believe I'm Mr. Darcy."</p><p>Which caused such a fit of laughter to erupt from the backseat that Bella couldn't help but join because Carlisle too was pressing his lips together as if fighting back a laugh at the horribly awful joke of it all. His shoulders were shaking betraying the fact that he couldn't actually contain the amusement he was feeling at the absurdity of comparing herself to Mr. Darcy.</p><p>"If that is what you want, then I do not mind being your Elizabeth Bennett," Carlisle turned the tables on her smoothly, he teeth showing as he broadly grinned shooting her a glance that she could not help but feel was more tender than the rather ludicrous words warranted.</p><p>"No, if anything, I'd say you're more Benedict to my Beatrice, or Gilbert to my Anne," Bella ducked her head as the rather sentimental words escaped her. As beautiful as the story of Pride and Prejudice was, she could not reconcile that to their own relationship.</p><p>The pair of them had always talked and had fallen into friendship before dancing into love. Somehow, to her, that was more romantic than any tale of misunderstandings and disparity.</p><p>"May I remind you that in this situation that you are Gilbert," Carlisle teased and Bella lost it all over again.</p><hr/><p>The shopping trip in Seattle was excruciating.</p><p>Bella knew that Alice knew that she knew that there was a particular outfit they were looking for but both of them were pretending for sanity's sake that the situation wasn't what it was in order to make sure everything unfolded as it should.</p><p>And that Bella was living in a universe where that made sense.</p><p>"C'mon!" Alice oozed positive energy and Bella really appreciated the girl's efforts as Jasper and Carlisle had made themselves scarce the instant their quartet had gotten close to the anything that resembled a men's clothing store.</p><p>So, Bella found herself with Alice in the middle of Soma with a tiny 4 foot 10 Vampire that had the audacity to say,</p><p>"Consider this our first proper Mother-Daughter excursion!"</p><p>"I said one outfit," Bella reminded the girl as her eyes scanned the plentiful racks of lingerie and evening wear which made the purpose of their visit clear,</p><p>"Hardly any of this counts as more than a bathing suit."</p><p>The idea of their daughter trying to sex Bella up for Carlisle was horrifying. Blame it on her Human sensibilities clashing with the Vampiric ones of their Coven which she could not yet fully understand, but the experience had to be akin to going mad.</p><p>Alice gave her a bit of an unimpressed look as she sighed without sounding like she was calling her an idiot, "This is just our first stop! An outfit consists of underwear too! After this there's LuluLemon with a lot of athletic lounge wear. It'll be right up your alley."</p><p>This was Alice's love language. She was a giver who gave clothes.</p><p>That was just how she was.</p><p>Bella reminded herself of that and took a breath, "Alright, let's find the perfect outfit."</p><p>With a limit of 2 hours, they had their work cut out for them especially since Bella needed to eat something at some point between shops. The whole trip was a whirlwind of bras, underwear, and rather scandalous baby doll dresses until Bella was landed with a sheer lace chemise the color of blood as well as an underwear set that she found surprisingly comfortable to the point that she made the mistake of piling more than one color into Alice's arms which had the Vampire practically vibrating like a tuning fork that had been slammed against the sidewalk.</p><p>Bella tried her best to ignore the price tag and focus on Alice's jubilance at the Human girl having permitted and taken part in the whole, rather indulgent, affair.</p><p>Mysteriously as they vanished, Carlisle and Jasper met up with the ladies outside of the Lululemon while Bella found herself munching on a food court burger and not minding it. She'd been able to cook all of her own meals through the week so she didn't quite mind the fast food at the moment. Besides that was part of the travel experience.</p><p>Run around and eat fast food.</p><p>The term 'Athletic Lounge Wear' sounded a bit oxymoronish, and as Bella perused the store she realized that it kind of was, while also being exactly the kind of thing she wouldn't mind wearing. It was a happy medium between Alice's need for everyone to dress like they' walked off the runway and Bella's own desire to just be comfy.</p><p>Not that she was about to go around wearing yoga pants, Bella wasn't going let Alice rip her denim jeans out of her cold dead hands.</p><p>"Maybe, you should look in the shorter sleeves... maybe 3/4s? " Alice sort of nudged as Bella as the Human girl was stuck on the long sleeves.</p><p>"Alice, my scar," she reminded the girl but Alice only frowned a bit and urged,</p><p>"Yeah, but Charlie will be happy to see you're showing a little skin."</p><p>Carlisle, from his place shifting through the men's Jackets turned towards them, clearly having heard Alice's words and become concerned. Bella wished their hearing wasn't so good for a moment as she sighed.</p><p>Alice was right though, Charlie had known something was wrong with her arm.</p><p>The bruise Jacob gave her was faded completely and the only bruises left were the ones on her thighs and other places that Carlisle had been a little too enthusiastic with. None would be visible if Bella wore the kind of blouse Alice was recommending.</p><p>"Yeah alright."</p><p>"And a skirt!" Alice cheered and that was the line.</p><p>"No skirts Alice, not today."</p><p>The Vampire girl huffed but didn't argue as Bella eventually promised to go shopping for a pair of pants later because there was no way in hell she was going to talk to Charlie looking like some sort of suburban Soccer Mom in Lululemon athletic pants.That would have made him think Carlisle had overhauled her brain with the Stepford treatment or something.</p><p>It was bad enough that she was arriving in a $88 dollar loose fit blouse with her nicest pair of jeans and a ballet slippers looking like she'd just gotten back from some sort of family holiday vacation.</p><p>There was only so much she could do to kill her chances at her dad listening.</p><p>One more time, Bella ignored the sales price and sort of wished that Carlisle hadn't paid fore her entire haul himself. It was a glimpse though at what was to come as he kissed her lightly in the middle of the store and asked, "Are you sure this is all you wanted?"</p><p>"I told Alice ONE outfit, your daughter is a menace and I won't give her space to argue."</p><p>Bella tried to ignore the sales clerk exchanging a look with the other as if they were going to be screaming about the creep and his 15 year old girlfriend for the next 40 years of their lives.</p><p>Having worked in customer service herself, Bella knew on some level that they didn't actually give a single fucking damn about the odd pair. Really, it was her own issue. She hated knowing that people were going to just put them in a box and slap a label on it before calling it a day.</p><p>That barely anyone would be close to the truth of it.</p><p>It was good that they had time to fix it.</p><p>Bella focused on that instead of the present.</p><p>And as Jasper drove them to Forks with Alice in the passenger side allowing Bella to lay herself against Carlisle in the safety of the backseat where he sat in the middle so she would be able to have a secure seat belt while they sort of just cuddled, she whispered,</p><p>"Will you still come through my window? Even though you don't have to anymore?"</p><p>She didn't care that Jasper and Alice could hear when Carlisle kissed her with all the tenderness of a snow drop which fell out of the sun,</p><p>"Of course. I'll lay with you until you no longer wish me to, even if it's until you never need to sleep again."</p><p>The words steeled her for what came next.</p><p>As they pulled over at the entrance of the forest drive, Alice and Jasper each gave Bella a hug before bidding her goodbye. It felt like a book closing.</p><p>No.</p><p>Like the end of a chapter as they began to walk their way up the gravel path hand in hand, while Bella climbed back into the front of the Mercedes. She watched them turn down the drive behind the trees and just knew in her heart they'd begun to run back home.</p><p>"I love you," Bella sighed as Carlisle shut the driver's door and she turned her eyes on him. It was a moment of something.</p><p>It wasn't nothing after all.</p><p>The man leaned over the console and Bella met him halfway, as their lips parted she pressed her forehead to his and her throat tightened but she pushed past it,</p><p>"I love you."</p><p>"I love you, I love you," Carlisle replied to both of her declarations with a reverence and while Bella had known they would be fine, she was glad for the moment as she settled herself back into her seat. Carlisle then proved Charlie wrong and drove her back to her father.</p><p>Pulling up the Charlie's house, technically her house still, was similar to how Bella had experienced her home in Phoenix.</p><p>Like a slice of frozen time had been preserved.</p><p>The Beast sat there in all it's beat up glory and Bella was relieved to see Charlie's cruiser next to it.</p><p>Carlisle was the first one to get off the car and Bella had stopped minding his and everyone else's habit of opening the door for her. So, she patiently waited as her Mate did so. Stepping out was like entering the world again, as if Alaska had been a different timeline they could simply step out into.</p><p>Desert Magic indeed.</p><p>Taking her lover's hand Bella kept her breathing steady while he grabbed her bag from the trunk before smiling at her softly,</p><p>"Are you ready?"</p><p>"I better be," she let out laugh that was more nervous than anything else before Carlisle shamelessly kissed her temple and nuzzled her hair in front of God and everybody.</p><p>Amazing fell short to describe it.</p><p>"Then let's talk to your father."</p><p>The walk may have been 1000 miles or one step, Bella wouldn't have been able to say as they approached the door. For the first time ever she knocked on it like a stranger. It was no surprise that there was a light shuffling sound before a pause.</p><p>Then, the tread of boot on the tile floor became like a stampede, likely as Charlie caught sight of the Mercedes out of the window.</p><p>It stopped and when the door opened Bella swallowed back everything as Charlie stood there staring at her like the most precious thing in the world. She let go of Carlisle's hand then, gently he let her fingers slip from between his own frigid ones as Bella fell forwards and wrapped her arms around her father.</p><p>"I'm so sorry! I shouldn't have left you like that! I should have waited until morning or stayed the night at the Cullens!</p><p>"I could have even just went to a Hotel! I'm so sorry! I can't tell you how much I regretted going so far away from you!"</p><p>Strong arms, Human and warm with the love only a father could give embraced her tightly, "You scared the hell out of me! You're going to be grounded until your 50!"</p><p>"That's fine!" Bella couldn't help it as her throat was beginning to burn with regret and sorrow at harming the heart of this man,</p><p>"I'll go to bed at 7 until I'm 300 if you tell me that's what it takes!"</p><p>Charlie inhaled sharply and pulled away from her but refused to let go of his daughter as he placed his rough hands on her shoulders before turning to Carlisle. In that moment he was a fearsome thing, like a dragon lashing out and protecting it's horde of finest gold,</p><p>"If you ever take her away from me like that again, I will kill you. Life in prison would be a thousand times easier than the hell you put me through Sunday night."</p><p>"I understand if you can not forgive me," Carlisle's tone was cold but contrite and Bella could feel it in her soul that he was barely sorry at all for it. Which, to be fair, she wasn't going to hold against him. Charlie was her dad not his,</p><p>"But I do regret the pain I've caused. You are a good man and I should have given you more respect than I have."</p><p>Charlie's eyes narrowed at him and Bella tried to move them all inside as she spoke up, "Dad, we need to talk and I don't think any of us can wait for tomorrow."</p><p>"You're right we do," her father sounded like he was barely containing his rage as he pulled Bella under his arm protectively,</p><p>"As much as I don't want to. As much as I wish I could just tell you to get the hell off my property and keep your entire family away from my girl, I have to know what the hell you think you're doing."</p><p>"Inside dad," Bella attempted as desperation clawed it's way up her spine, "The neighbors have seen enough don't you think?"</p><p>"Damn right," Charlie sighed as he finally pulled Bella inside without so much as an invitation to Carlisle. Bella cast him a look, attempting to convey all her apology but the Vampire just smiled at her lightly when he followed.</p><p>As if he was just glad to see all of Charlie's rage on him.</p><p>Carlisle set her bag down on the dining room table and Bella felt awful as her father continued to glare at the man like he'd suddenly manifest laser vision that could vaporize the Doctor on the spot.</p><p>"So, spit it out, what the hell do you think you're doing running off with my 18 year old daughter who you've apparently been trying to seduce since you met her when she was a very underage 17," the calm to Charlie's voice was deceptive as there was a clear rumbling like a thunderstorm trying to shake his skeleton apart.</p><p>"I know, there is nothing I can say that will make you trust or believe me," Carlisle's voice was steady, but Bella could hear a war cry under it and she hoped to God that this didn't end up escalating to Charlie shouting and Carlisle going cold and still like the Grimm Reaper himself,</p><p>"But I have found in Isabella something I've never discovered in anyone else and that is... She is.."</p><p>He trailed and Bella realized suddenly, that Carlisle was trying not to spout his usual poetry. That wouldn't work with Charlie, the man would just think the Vampire was being an asshole.</p><p>"Easy to talk to, listens and has a point of view that continually alters my own. I just want to make her happy, be the one to make her happy. And I never-</p><p><em>"Never</em> thought I'd say that about anyone, let alone one of my patients, especially one that is friends with my own children."</p><p>Carlisle let out a long sigh and Bella couldn't help but think he seemed more ready to do battle than vulnerable in his quiet calm.</p><p>"She's a child," Charlie protested, his breath short and clearly he was trying to maintain his cool head, "What are you going to do when she goes to college? This does't end happy. People are already talking about how you kidnapped her and have been taking advantage of her since before the Arizona fiasco!</p><p>"Hell, one of my own boys at the station asked me if I was going to press charges! Do you know how many people have come over here this past week telling me they won't go to the hospital until they see you gone?!"</p><p>"I can imagine more that half the town," Carlisle replied and Bella wanted to rail on him because his tone had come across a smidgen too smug for an apology and this was not the time to laugh about all the broken hearts Bella was going to be dancing on. Charlie didn't notice though as Carlisle continued,</p><p>"But as long as Isabella doesn't mind then I don't care either. I've already told her what I want.</p><p>"Chief, you are right to see me as this man trying to take your daughter away. Seeing as I'm nearly twice her age, it's reasonable, but I do want to do right by her."</p><p>Charlie appeared uncomfortable with the sentiments being expressed as he turned to Bella and inhaled sharply, "You haven't said anything about any of this.</p><p>"Bella he's a grown man. When you're in a relationship you need things in common as well as things to do on your own. Sweetheart I know you're mature for your age, but this? Bells I can't imagine you being happy with a man who has a career, a mortgage and a whole life behind him."</p><p>Then, daring to do better, Bella decided to do right by Charlie, to do for him what she'd done already for so many others and ripped herself opened,</p><p>"Dad, have you ever heard of the Italian writer Petrarch?"</p><p>His face said it all, the Chief of police was a bit gobsmacked but likely knew a leading question when he saw one so he replied, "No, you know I haven't'."</p><p>"He's the Father of the Renaissance and the Modern Italian language," Bella steeled herself but found herself snorting out a laugh when Carlisle added with a modicum of humor,</p><p>"And that Father of Humanism, you very aggressively reminded me of that fact, if I recall."</p><p>"And the Father of Humanism," Bella nodded as she looked her father in the eye and could see something in there was a startled by that exchange,</p><p>"And Carlisle is the first person I've ever met who knew who I was talking about when I brought up Petrarch. People don't-</p><p>"People don't really understand me when I really want to talk, It's like I'm speaking an alien language but Carlisle has always been able to translate it. I know he wants a wife, I know that he wants to take me on dates and that people will look at us and think I'm dating him because he's filthy rich with a 15 car capacity at his house.</p><p>"But dad, I know he's willing to follow me to college and support whatever career I choose and that he loves me enough that if I told him to leave right now and never come back he would."</p><p>Looking between them her father's agitation seemed to build but what Bella didn't expect was for Charlie to pull away from her and begin rubbing his forehead like he had a migraine.</p><p>"Bella, what happens when you want kids? If you go to college and wait for that then he'll be in his 40's and when they're 16 he'll be in his 50's at 18 he'll be..."</p><p>Charlie was running out of steam and Bella couldn't help but feel like she could see his thoughts running rampant and realizing in real time the same thing that she was.</p><p>The entire relationship was a bit unconventional but once she was in her 20's the 15 years between her and Carlisle would be practically nothing.</p><p>That having kids in your 40's was something people did every day.</p><p>The only issues were that the timing was all off, he'd found her too early, and he'd taken in supposed nieces and nephews from a sibling who just happened to be either extremely older or had started young.</p><p>It was like watching her father go through a crises as a delicate hope bloomed in her chest.</p><p>Because she was only 18.</p><p>17 when they'd met and it wasn't right at the moment but in 5 years who would look at a 23 year old and a 38 year old and think it was weird?</p><p>"How serious are you?" Charlie demanded from Carlisle like the devil himself was in his living room, and Bella's heart was racing at the raw emotion in her father's eyes as the man pointed a harsh finger at her Mate,</p><p>"Because I won't have you running around with her, making promises, taking up all her love, and then hanging her out to dry the moment you're bored! I won't have that! I won't take part in that!</p><p>"Carlisle I used to respect you and if you felt so guilty about it that you didn't come to me that tells me you're ashamed of her! Of what you feel for my daughter or that you've done this to a dozen other girls and are scared I'd dig it up!"</p><p>"I'm not ashamed," Carlisle declared boldly and the sound of it ricocheted like a comet ping ponging of the zillions of stars that spanned her entire being and raced across the black to etch a path to the man she loved,</p><p>"I only remained silent because I wanted to give Bella the choice of when to tell you. There has never been anyone, and I know that sounds a bit like a flowery lie a manipulator might tell, but I've lived a very solitary life.</p><p>"First I poured everything into my studies to get into a good school and then Medicine was everything. Once I had a good job, I had to take care of my nieces and nephews. Sure, they're like my own now but the situation demanded so much time and effort that life has just kept passing me by.</p><p>"Chief, I want to marry Isabella and make her Mrs. Carlisle Cullen one day, but only if she'll have me."</p><p>"That's a lot Bella," Charlie's tone was the same as before, "I don't want to lose you like I just did, and I know you think you like him but Bella that's a lot for girl your age.</p><p>"He's got a whole future with you planned. What have you been wanting? I doubt it's all that."</p><p>Ducking her head Bella suddenly felt tears rolling down her cheek at the overly sanitized Human version of Carlisle's tale, because she knew the truth.</p><p>The bits of hundreds of years that spanned in between.</p><p>"All of it," Bella swallowed and tried to keep her head, her cool and calm, "I wouldn't mind graduating from college Bella Cullen if that's what we decided down the road.</p><p>"I've thought about it for a long time and I want that. I even thought about what you said and you're right dad, I don't need him.<br/>I don't need Carlisle at all, I could live without him but I want a future with him so badly it sometimes feels like I do.</p><p>"But I <em>do</em> need you dad. So whatever restrictions you put on us I'll do it. I don't want to lose you. I don't think I could bear it."</p><p>Heavy was the gaze that roved between them and Charlie heaved a deep shuddering breath as all the fight just seemed to leave him,</p><p>"If you're just screwing around here I'll find out about it. Do you hear me Cullen?"</p><p>"I do," Carlisle nodded slowly and Bella couldn't help but think it was delicate as if he was trying not to shatter the easing atmosphere as her father shoved his hands in his pockets.</p><p>"8 O' clock, I want you home every night at 8. You're not allowed sleep overs unless it's here with your friends and no trips anywhere that isn't Port Angeles.</p><p>"Even then I want you to check in with me when you get there and when you leave and you better have Angela or Leah with you none of Cullen's kids I don't trust them anymore."</p><p>The air was like a wind tunnel as every single word dropping out of Charlie's mouth slammed into Bella like a sledge hammer even as he went on,</p><p>"You drive yourself to school and you drive yourself back. If you visit the Cullens at all you're telling me the day before.</p><p>"You can go on dates but the curfew applies and I have to know the day before on that too. If i think of anything else I'll tell you."</p><p>"Breathe Isabella," Carlisle's gentle tone broke through her shock as he places a light hand on her forearm and suddenly Bella was gasping for air she hadn't realized she had been forsaking.</p><p>Knowing Carlisle wouldn't mind, Bella rushed forwards away from him and careened once more into her father, Charlie again wrapped his arms around her,</p><p>"Bella I'm trying to do my best here. I have no idea what I'm doing but I'm trying."</p><p>"I know," Bella choked out and it felt desperate,"I know. Thank you for trying. "</p><p>"I just don't want to lose you Bells," Charlie whispered and Bella knew that Carlisle could hear Charlie's heart breaking in those words, that he would have never even given the conditions if he thought there was a chance Bella would stay. She took a glance at her Mate and his face betrayed nothing but a soft reverie for the scene before him.</p><p>When the Swans parted Bella kissed her father lightly on the cheek hoping to convey her love even more, it was a light caress, one she may have given one the kids and it caused Charlie smile, if only a little bit.</p><p>Carlisle gave a small and rather strained goodbye, one that Bella soothed by taking hold of his coat and pulling him down for a light, chaste peck on the lips while Charlie turned away as if witnessing a betrayal.</p><p>It was small..</p><p>Minuscule even.</p><p>But a journey of a thousand miles always started with one step.</p><p><br/>Carlisle was out the door and Bella took a breath as she slowly, almost cautiously turned back to her father where he was standing  and wasn't even surprised when Charlie informed her,</p><p>"I still don't approve. The only reason I'm even setting restrictions because I don't trust you not to see him in secret if I said no altogether.</p><p>"Bella do you understand? I don't trust you anymore! I look at you and I see a strange girl who used to be quiet and shy who suddenly ran off with Fork's most eligible bachelor to <em>God knows where</em>  <em>Alaska.</em>"</p><p>"I know," Bella sobbed and she was startled at the feeling of a bright star traveling to her like a message of love, </p><p>"I'm going to try to do better, I don't want to hurt you anymore dad. I've just kept hurting you over and over."</p><p>"Bella you're my baby girl, you're gonna break my heart a thousand times whether you like it or not," Charlie sighed and that was the most beautiful thing she'd ever heard from him, it was almost poetry,</p><p>"What I don't like is that you seem like you've become someone else ever since you started up with him."</p><p>Bella wondered if that was true? Had she really changed so much? She didn't think so, but there was a part of her that couldn't help but think she might have. As if Carlisle had lifted her from a stack of old rusted metal, sharpened and polished her until she shone like a decorative sword.</p><p>She'd become more herself than she had ever been as he'd helped her peel away all her quiet insecurities and stood back so she could bloom.</p><p>How different was Carlisle?</p><p>From what she'd seen he was likely very different from what his friends had known him to be.</p><p>"I'm still me," She attempted to assure her father, but it came out weaker than she intended. One day she wouldn't still be her, she'd be Blood Thirsty and ravenous until her mind once more was tamed and she became another version of herself that was frozen that way forever.</p><p>"Let's hope," Charlie sighed and tore his eyes from her as if he couldn't bear to look her in the eye as he said,</p><p>"For your sake that you're right about him, because if you aren't I don't know what I might do."</p><p>Bella really didn't know what to say that wouldn't sound petulant or immature so she just accepted the words and let them wash over her.</p><p>Knowing she was right was enough.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0021"><h2>21. Chapter 21</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Dawn of the first day 72 hours remain</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>A cold hand running up an down her stomach woke Bella and she sighed as her eyes fluttered opened against the sparse light in her room. Carlisle was laying beside her, as promised and she couldn't help but smile as she groggily pushed herself up only to be met halfway in a lazy press of lips like an ocean washing away foot prints on the sand.</p><p>"Good morning," Bella sighed quietly and Carlisle slowly gifted her a kunik.</p><p>"Good morning Darling."</p><p>He then kissed her again with a little more intention and as Bella found herself eager to return it she still managed to pull away, "Charlie still home?"</p><p>"No," Carlisle replied and it was heavy as he began, a bit too eagerly for a Sunday morning, mouthing her neck and leaving more Venom than Bella was used to when they were still clothed.</p><p>Gently, Carlisle scraped his razor sharp teeth against her shoulder and it sent a wave of shiver's down her spine as he whispered,</p><p>"I want you, is that alright? I know you might not... After last night..."</p><p>Bella shifted herself until she was facing him and was surprised to find the genuine nervous reluctance in his eyes, shining like she would tell him no because the magic of isolation and distance was gone and Charlie was still hurting so much from what they'd done to him.</p><p>As if now that they were back in Forks he wasn't her Vampiric Husband.</p><p>"Carlisle, I love you," Bella ran her hand up his cotton shirt with a smile that she knew had to come off a bit more shy than she'd intended,</p><p>"I won't mind having sex here as long as Charlie isn't in the house."</p><p>It wasn't quick after that, but it was a dance slowly becoming more comfortable as their hands peeled away the sparse layers between them. Bella couldn't help but long for her hand to be healed fully so that she could do more for him as they simply felt each other letting those smoldering coals they'd been keeping gently stoked ignite like a bonfire.</p><p>As they gently rocked together, Bella's finger's ran up her lover's stomach and chest while Carlisle gripped the iron bar bed frame while keeping his other hand on her hip in a tight hold which wouldn't quite bruise.</p><p>He was getting better at that.</p><p>Leaving marks only when he meant to.</p><p>She reveled in the feeling of him between her thighs moving at a pace that was satisfyingly quick and made her gasp out his name like an oath, even though she knew the gentle roll of their hips would have her reaching her completion before him.</p><p>It was simply a disparity of species that Carlisle needed a bit more time so Bella did her best to cry out words of love and desire as he continued to thrust after her own climax had been reached until they were both fully sated.</p><p>The feeling of basking in their love making in a place so familiar as her room was heady and almost too much for her. Bella though was content to kiss her Mate languidly until she needed to clean herself up.</p><p>Strawberry shampoo and her fresh scent hydrating body wash were welcome as Bella showered for the first time in a week with her preferred scents. As lovely as the Denali's choices were for their guest room, it was nice to feel that extra piece of home.</p><p>When Bella returned, fresh and clean, to her bedroom Carlisle was in his cotton shirt and boxers as he flipped through Bella's marked up copy of Wuthering Heights in his place lounging on her bed.</p><p>"You should leave the box of condoms here," Bella tried her best to sound casual, as she was a firm believer in the fact that if someone was going to be having sex then they should be able to communicate about these sort of things,</p><p>"Or at least let me write down the type so I can go buy some to keep in the nightstand."</p><p>Carlisle looked up from his tour of her book as he slowly closed it before sitting up a bit straighter,</p><p>"I will let you keep the box, though anything of the same sizing made of polyurethane will be fine."</p><p>"Not latex?" Bella didn't exactly have an allergy and it wasn't like anything could touch Carlisle's diamond like flesh.</p><p>"Latex, and polyisoprene are prone to degrade with chemicals and my Venom isn't an exception to that. Polyurethane won't breakdown. Though they are a slightly less pliable it's the only option that will prevent Venom regularly entering your body."</p><p>That was..</p><p>She supposed breakage was an issue in the first place but a barrier was the only way to prevent Carlisle's rather reasonable concerns. After all, if his Venom could eat through latex that mean it likely wouldn't be pleasant to have that inside of her.</p><p>Suddenly a wave of unadulterated panic swept over her as s Bella inhaled deeply and attempted not to freak out.</p><p>This was something they should have talked about before! It was so small though as she was so used to thinking of protection as contraceptives! Bella wasn't so much of an idiot that she didn't know there were other uses for them but this was a whole other level of risky.</p><p>"Carlisle what are we supposed to do if it breaks? I can't exactly take a morning after pill for Vampirism!"</p><p>He was in front of her then while Bella's heart was beginning to feel like a jack hammer echoing in her brain. Carlisle cupped her face in his hands and the tone he took was soothing, his scent swept over her, comforting and cool as he assured,</p><p>"If it breaks I will be able to feel it. There is enough control in me to stop and care for the situation before it should be come an issue.</p><p>"Your health is more important than the pleasure we find together. I will not risk you. Besides, one mistake will be uncomfortable but it won't be enough to alter you by much unless it enters your blood stream."</p><p>"Right, I'm sorry I freaked out," Bella forced as smile as she shook her worry away, but Carlisle kissed her forehead,</p><p>"There is no need to apologize Isabella, we should have discussed this more thoroughly. I'm only glad to have talked before we met with the situation and you believed I was unprepared."</p><p>Leaning into him Bella sighed in relief as he wrapped his arms around her waist. It was still early and she knew that he'd be leaving soon. It would be dangerous for him to be seen though, so he'd likely exit through the back forest with the stealth only a Vampire could lay claim to.</p><p>"I have to get dressed," Bella pulled away once she was beginning to feel a bit more calm over the matter,</p><p>"I was hoping to go swing by Leah's and see if she'll talk to me. I'm a bit scared though, she might be avoiding Angela from embarrassment but I'm pretty sure her parents have a lot more to do with the radio silence she's giving me."</p><p>Carlisle hummed lightly as he very gently stroked her towel clad hips as well as her back, "I know you are worried but I fear that I must ask you to hold off on such a visit.</p><p>"The Quileute Elders will no doubt have very strong opinions now that the truth of the matter is out and I fear you going to the Reservation without proper preparation."</p><p>"So a family meeting first, then Leah," Bella tried not to groan, she wished this wasn't so political and she could just waltz over and bang down the Clearwater's door, but she was Carlisle's wife in all the ways that mattered.</p><p>She would need to be able to speak on behalf of the family if Harry or Billy decided that enough was enough and she needed to be confronted.</p><p>"Precisely," Carlisle inhaled and Bella wondered how strong the scent of her shampoo must be at the moment but said nothing as he slowly released his hold on her before planting a small caress on her lips.</p><p>"I'll tell Charlie I'll be going to your house after school tomorrow then."</p><p>It was the best option.</p><p>So as Bella readied herself for the slow Sunday of holing herself up in solitude,  Carlisle sneaked himself out of the house.</p><p>She sent a text to Angela letting her friend know that she'd arrive safely back in Forks, and then spent the rest of her day catching up on chores that had been neglected in her absence. Charlie was an adult who had lived alone for a very long time so it wasn't as if he was normally messy.</p><p>Mostly she found herself doing her own laundry and finally printing out the pictures from her camera which had been very somberly left on her dresser just next to Bella's bedroom door. It was a cruel reminder of that awful night but Bella pushed through it determined to move forwards, repair that heart she had broken piece by piece and earn his trust back as best as she could manage.</p><p>The most awkward and stilted part of the day was when Charlie arrived home to her making dinner. She wondered if he'd eaten out all week or had just subsisted on box mac n cheese because of all the gossip running rampant like the new plague.</p><p>She herself hand't heard anything yet, but Bella knew exactly how much like wildfire bad news like theirs spread through the sleepy town of Forks.</p><p>"You talk to your friends today?" Charlie asked with a clear dose of nervous energy and Bella took a moment to stir the pot of chili she was making.</p><p>"I texted Angela but she hasn't said anything back, she's... I managed to talk to her earlier his week though."</p><p>The man hummed as he took off his work jacket and hung the outerwear on it's hook. Bella felt like an alien. The house was some how to empty and too big to contain her properly without rattling around like a bead in a maraca<br/>"Carlisle asked me to come over tomorrow, y'know, to talk to-</p><p>"His kids about what's happening."</p><p>Bella hated herself in that moment as she'd grown so complacent in Alaska that the words 'our kids' almost came out of her Human 18 year old mouth in a conversation with Charlie, who was one step away from trying to see what would happen if a Human attempted to punch a Vampire.</p><p>"What time will you be home?" Charlie's tone was immediately stiff and Bella turned on the oven light to check in the cornbread before turning to face him,</p><p>"I was planning on going to see Leah after so probably just before 8?"</p><p>"Planning to see Leah?" Charlie didn't sound convinced at all and Bella knew she probably deserved that as he took a breath,</p><p>"Just call me when you leave the Cullens alright?"</p><p>"Right," Bella nodded and knew she shouldn't fight but her father didn't move from his place in the doorway still wearing his work clothes.</p><p>He stared at her and for once Bella felt like a zoo creature in her own house before in a mildly terrified and tortured tone Charlie asked,</p><p>"You're being safe right? You and C- Cullen are using... protection."</p><p>Great.</p><p>Just perfect.</p><p>Bella tried not to choke on her own spit as she realized Charlie thought she was heading over to the Cullens just to screw around.</p><p>That he would even ask.</p><p>It was one thing to talk about contraceptives and sex with Carlisle, it was an entirely different ball game when her Father was the one asking the questions. Mortification was enveloping her as she knew she had to answer.</p><p>She had to be honest too,</p><p>No telling him she was still a virgin.</p><p>Charlie was likely under no illusions over the fact that she and Carlisle had vanished to Alaska for a full week, he knew that Bella wasn't going to just be building snowmen with Jasper as well as playing pool with Kate and Irina.</p><p>Bella wasn't sorry...</p><p>She was confident that Carlisle wouldn't have wanted to make love that morning if Bella was still a virgin. Taking her first time in her full size bed that she'd kind of grew up in was probably grounds for being sent straight to hell.</p><p>But they wouldn't have had the chance any time soon, there was no such thing as perfect but Bella had privately though the experience was close. Because it had been them and Carlisle had clearly suffered just as many nerves as she had. Impossibly it had been beautiful in it's fumbling and unsurety.</p><p>Mustering all her confidence and reminding herself that despite what Charlie thought, they weren't really doing anything wrong, Bella replied and she knew her face was as red as a stop light,</p><p>"Yeah dad. We're being safe."</p><p>Under his breath Charlie hissed out, "Jesus."</p><p>Running a hand through his hair, Bella's heart went out to him as his eyes looked wet with emotion that made her wish she could impossibly just tell him the whole truth.</p><p>"Alright," Charlie choked and Bella knew that some part of him had hoped. Prayed even that she was still a virgin. It made sense, no dad would want their kid out having sex with a man so much older. Still, she was glad she hadn't lied.</p><p>She didn't want to lie anymore where she didn't have to.</p><p>Necessary lies.</p><p>They didn't feel so bad compared to the ones that had finally just been wiped away in one fell evening.</p><p>"Well I made it clear to the guys I wasn't going to press charges, that you're 18 and I can only do so much about who you see.</p><p>"That's all I'm doing though. He can put out his own damn fires over at the hospital."</p><p>Bella nodded before putting on an oven mitt and taking out the cornbread, Charlie kept watching her as she stuck a toothpick into the tray before pulling it out clean.</p><p>"Do you think you'll be alright at school?"</p><p>"I'll be fine," Bella assured him and finally she felt completely confident, not even an ounce of worry or concern,</p><p>"It's Jasper and Edward we'll have to worry about trying to fight for my honor."</p><p>A noise escaped the back of Charlie's throat and it was a strangle confusion that had him putting his hand on his hips and finally breaking as he demanded,</p><p>"Bella I can't wrap my head around it and you need to explain it, but what the hell is going on with those kids and you? You're the same age as them and they all just-"</p><p>He cut him self off as he looked at her expectantly, and Bella remembered the moment she'd first gone to the Cullen's house. How she had felt like they were offering her up as a sacrifice for their father as they all escorted her to where Carlisle had stood on the landing.</p><p>By Human logic they should all hate her or at least be revolted by her very existence and what she meant for their family.</p><p>Instead they all teasingly called her mom until they genuinely meant it.</p><p>"They just want Carlisle to be happy," Bella tried to tell as much as she could without giving it all away,</p><p>"He's done so much for them so they're trying to be supportive. As unconventional as it is, you have to remember he's the same man who adopted two more kids so that Rosalie and Jasper wouldn't have to be separated from Alice and Emmett when they left their foster home."</p><p>"Unconventional," Charlie heaved such a great lament it was the most worrying thing of the evening . Bella turned off the oven and set the cornbread's tin on the cooling rack before stirring the chili again to ensure it didn't burn.</p><p>"Yeah."</p><p>And it was the last he'd say for a while.</p><p> </p><hr/><p> </p><p>On Monday morning Bella woke up alone, but Carlisle had left clear evidence of his departure in the form of his black double breasted coat laying across her vanity chair.</p><p>Attached to it was a sticky note, with not his own words, but a scripture.</p><p>
  <em>"Set me as a seal upon your heart, as a seal upon your arm, for love is strong as death, jealousy is fierce as the grave. It's flashes are flashes of fire, the very flame of the LORD. Many waters cannot quench love, neither can floods drown it. If a man offered for love all the wealth of his house, he would be utterly despised." -<strong>Song of Solomon 8:6-7</strong></em>
</p><p>Covering her mouth Bella swallowed back the overwhelming love that crashed through her like an incoming tide against the rocks, pulled by the force of the moon upon the earth. As he moved her in the same fashion simply by moving himself in the way he walked and smiled.</p><p>It was ridiculous and romantic in a way that he wished to lay such thorough claim to her. To allow Bella to show no shame. The scarf had been her small secret confession for only her and the other Cullens to see and know.</p><p>But this was clearly a man's coat, far too big for her and a little too fancy. Everyone would know that she did not give a damn.</p><p>It was shameless and Bella dared. The girl cleaned her stitches, got dressed, and instead of grabbing her hoodie, she slid into Carlisle's coat. His familiar scent immediately engulfed her and Bella's heart warmed, another bright shimmer echoed across the universe which their Bond contained.</p><p>The thing was practically a mini dress that hit just below her knees when on Carlisle the piece of outerwear reached his mid thigh. Nevertheless, she took it as he armor and Bella wrapped it around her like a coat of mail before grabbing her truck keys which she'd attached Jasper's Vampire Mace onto.</p><p>Charlie had already left and Bella could feel her nerves slipping away as she reminded herself that Edward, Alice, and Jasper would be there. And when they couldn't be, none of the teachers would allow a volatile scene.</p><p>The drive was calming as Carlisle filled her senses and the radio played that stupid show about dates gone weird.</p><p>By the time she pulled up to the school, Bella was able to block out all the silent stares her truck was getting. Which was good. Because this time it was much, much worse than when she was just 'the new girl'.</p><p>Climbing out of The Beast, before anyone could even make to approach her, Bella was joined by Alice, and Jasper who had been idling by the empath's Ducati just a few spaces away. The pair flanked her like two mighty pillars.</p><p>She said nothing to them, not even as Edward fell into step behind her as he climbed out of his Volvo that she had missed, but was parked closer to the school.</p><p>All eyes were on them like they were a bomb about to go off.</p><p>Bella tucked her hands into the Jacket's pocket and was surprised when Jasper scented the air nearly conspicuously before complete calm washed over her as if he'd taken the comfort she was experiencing from the jacket and increased it tenfold.</p><p>No one dared to approached them as they entered the cafeteria, anyone who appeared like they might chance it was immediately quelled by a look from Jasper or perhaps even Edward.</p><p>Her guard in full force, it was enough to get everyone's chattering even louder as their group approached their usual spot where Angela was eating a pale imitation of a sausage scrambled.</p><p>The Human girl's jaw dropped as she caught sight of their group.</p><p>Edward pulled Bella's chair out which she silently accepted as Angela leaned forward, ashen faced,</p><p>"Are you wearing what I think you are?!"</p><p>"Mama looks good," Jasper's serious expression broke into a smile and Bella shot him a look which did little but make him pretend he wasn't grinning uncontrollably.</p><p>"Oh God," Angela pulled off her glasses before pressing the back of her hand to her eyes as she let out a huge breath,</p><p>"I thought you were all going to at least act normal about this!!"</p><p>"I don't know if you've noticed, but we're not exactly a normal nuclear suburban family," Edward said through gritted teeth and Bella knew he had to not only deal with what they were all saying, but what they were thinking. Jasper too could likely feel all the disapproval and disgust being poured out in concentrate towards their little quartet.</p><p>Perhaps Alice could even see some of the more rash decisions made Bella's way.</p><p>It was clear all three of the Cullens were on the edges of their seats and ready to have to bolt with Bella tossed over Alice's shoulder like some sort of dignitary being evacuated after an assassination attempt.</p><p>"So you all knew," Angela hissed, like she was holding out some hope that Bella had been skanking it up behind everyone's back and the Cullens clear support had taken the wind out of those sails.</p><p>She knew, due to undisclosable information, Angela was in the right. The same way Charlie was the hero of the story unfolding and Carlisle was the villain whose crimes were lust and gluttony in tandem.</p><p>"The age of consent in Washington is 16," Alice replied evenly and it was the harshest Bella had ever heard the tiny girl ever address someone,</p><p>"I was worried about Charlie pressing charges but he can't because Bella was 17 when they met so legally he wouldn't have a leg to stand on in court.</p><p>"The only way our father could have gotten in trouble is if he was Bella's boss or had custody rights over her."</p><p>Bella felt her jaw drop at that horrifying tidbit of information, "16!? Is nothing sacred! How the hell is the age of consent 16!?"</p><p>Alice shrugged noncommittally, "I don't know, I'm not the creeps who made the law alright."</p><p>Angela was staring at them like the were crazy. Which, to be fair, from her perspective they were being really hypocritical...</p><p>Oops.</p><p>"Bella this is insane," Angela slide her glasses back on, clearly she had no idea what to even say to it all but was making an attempt anyways,</p><p>"I'm not going to abandon you, clearly your other friends are biased, but I'm not going to be happy about this.</p><p>"Bella he's-"</p><p>"Don't," Edward's tone was so dangerous that Bella shot him a look as the copper haired boy head leaned towards Angela nearly looming,</p><p>"Don't even say it. She's heard enough of it and she's going to hear it a thousand more times. You're her friend Angela."</p><p>Bella wondered what the other girl was about to say that Edward had felt the need to completely cut her off. Even endangering revealing his ability to read minds as he did so.</p><p>"I'm trying to be the reasonable one!" Angela's distress was palpable and Bella wondered what everything must look like to this girl,</p><p>"Everything in my life has gone completely insane! First Leah's not talking to me then her mom's saying she's not allowed to talk to me until they have a chance to sort you out like you're some sort of deal breaker!</p><p>"Then I find out what they mean by 'When Bella get's back' is that you'd run off with Dr. Cullen to Alaska because you've apparently decided to American Beauty it!</p><p>"My dad hasn't stopped talking about how you're bound to lead me down the road of sin!"</p><p>Bella heaved a deep deep breath because Jasper was starting to vibrate in his chair like a noodle dancer in a car lot while Edward and Alice looked 3 seconds away from a crime.</p><p>"First off, Lester was married with clear issues and Second Angela was a bit of an idiot who let her little fantasy crush get out of hand and didn't understand what it would mean to have sex with a grown man old enough to be her father,"</p><p>Bella knew she was sounding insane but she was going to lose it and tear someone's hair out with the rage she was feeling and it wasn't going to be any of her friends,</p><p>"Third, don't you ever compare Carlisle to a man who chased a 16 year old girl for her body because he'd never had satisfaction in his own marriage. I don't care if he is ficitonal,</p><p>"Give me a little credit here. I'm not an idiot."</p><p>"Why are you focused on that part?!" Angela too, seemed on the verge of tearing hair of her own out,</p><p>"What am I supposed to say Angela?" Bella refused to feel tired and she was glad that Angela was discreet enough to keep her voice down like herself and the Cullens were. Well, the kids had all stopped talking because they'd likely say something rude and knew Bella wanted to keep Angela's friendship.</p><p>"That you're alright! That you're safe and you're not being hurt."</p><p>"I'm fine. I'm happy," she assured her friend but Angela didn't look pleased at all.</p><p>"Say that without your entourage of his kids."</p><p>"Ask me again in English," was the only thing she could say, Edward wouldn't mind ditching English. From their conversations, Bella couldn't help but think Edward wouldn't have minded skipping high school altogether.</p><p>Then the bell rang and Bella was forced to head towards History.</p><p>Her longest stretch of class that would be taken alone.</p><p>So, Bella grabbed her bag and was surprised when Edward hugged her before planting the most gentle of chaste kisses on her head,</p><p>"Be safe alright? I don't want you hurting your good hand."</p><p>Bella huffed out a laugh but agreed to not get into any fights that she couldn't help before Alice and Jasper both gave her their own hugs in full display of the students within the cafeteria.</p><p>They all stared at her as she rushed through the halls, ignoring them the best she could, pushing away everything they might be saying and the kinds of boxes they were shoving her into because they all thought they saw the whole picture.</p><p>Poor thing.</p><p>Poor thing.</p><p>She's dipping into someone else's daddy's wallet in exchange for virtue and decency.</p><p>The first bad thing to happen wasn't during history.</p><p>Because their teacher Mr. Acker wasn't the kind of man who let any tomfoolery occur under his watch.</p><p>No.</p><p>The first bad thing happened after when he asked Bella to stay behind and talk to him about make up assignments. On the surface it was kind of him and Bella knew she would have to approach all of her teachers about it.</p><p>But Mr. Acker had looked at her like he knew exactly the kind of girl she was when he handed her the folder and said,</p><p>"And Miss Swan, try to behave yourself with your classmates. It's bad enough that you've dragged a respectable family through the mud."</p><p>Bella nearly saw red but took the folder and grit her teeth as she refused to reply, refused to dignify that vicious statement with a response as she turned on her heel and stormed out of the room only to find Jasper waiting there to walk her to their shared Calc Class.</p><p>He clearly heard everything as he was still as a statue.</p><p>Bella grabbed his wrist with her good hand, it was cold and somehow rough but smaller than Carlisle's as her good sensitive southern boy had a more wiry frame,</p><p>"Jasper, C'mon. We'll be late for class."</p><p>Golden eyes turned to her as he nodded once before choking out a harsh laugh, allowing himself to be led by her,</p><p>"Next time use your mace."</p><p>Bella actually chortled at that but only shook her head at his rather gruesome reaction to what he'd heard. As the pair made their way through the halls, they gathered up a thousand judging glances that Jasper was determined to return tenfold as he informed Bella,</p><p>"Alice wanted me to tell you that if Edward goes through with ditching English, Lauren will confront you out on the lawn after school's over for you."</p><p>Bella sighed, and wasn't that great? She could either assure Angela and be confronted by the Queen Bee for playing holier than thou while she was sneaking around with the very man Lauren had been lusting after or have an undramatic day where Angela decides the Cullens were controlling brain washers  that wouldn't leave Bella along for 2 seconds for a reasonable person to talk her out of the course she'd set for herself.</p><p>Because Bella didn't need Alice's gift to see that's what would happen.</p><p>There was only one choice really, "I'll deal with Lauren, thanks."</p><p>"Everyone is going to see her grab you," Jasper warned and turned his bright sun drop colored eyes to her nearly pleading. Bella knew he'd rather preserve her the embarrassment and scorn but she didn't want to lose Angela.</p><p>Not now when she needed her friends the most.</p><p>"Then everyone is going to know she's a burger flipper Jasper. I'm not going to give up my friends because some- some girl thinks I stole a man who never looked at her once let alone twice."</p><p>Reaching their shared class, the empath propped the door opened for her and gave her a toothy grin, "You know I just came to a startling conclusion."</p><p>"And what's that Jazz?" Bella sighed at his sudden rather infectious smile as she filed into the room, the Vampire following behind shortly.</p><p>"Carlisle is the nice one."</p><p>Needless to say, when Calculus ended and Mr. Varner called Bella to stay behind, Jasper waited for her at the door, hovering ominously.</p><p>In English Angela stared at her like Bella had killed Edward and rolled his body down a canyon instead of just convincing the boy to ditch.</p><p>"Where's Edward," Angela, of course, asked because that was why she was frantically looking around.</p><p>"He left school early," Bella replied as she pulled out her book and began flipping to the assigned reading on the board,</p><p>"I told you that you could ask me again in English, I wasn't going to have Edward hovering around for it. That wouldn't exactly help my case."</p><p>Lauren Mallory walked in then and her eyes locked onto Bella like a heat seeking missile. Green ocean eyes bored into Bella as the popular blonde glided through the chairs and very delicately settled into her chosen seat for the day, still staring at the brunette as if there was murder in her heart.</p><p>"What's with her?" Angela looked between them and Bella sighed feeling like the day had gone on for decades instead of hours. They still had a family meeting to get through after this, didn't they.</p><p>Absently she hoped Irina and Kate would be there, it would be fun to see how they got on with everyone else,</p><p>"Ignore Lauren, I'm supposed to be telling you I'm safe, happy, and that Carlisle is a perfect gentlemen."</p><p>"Alright, sure," Angela shrugged looking a bit helpless, "But are you really?"</p><p>The bell rang and Bella closed her eyes and grit her teeth, "Yes, I'm really happy. I love him Angela and he loves me too, it's unconventional but it won't matter in a few years."</p><p>"What if he doesn't want you in a few years because he wants someone younger?" Angela frowned Bella wouldn't have it,</p><p>"Angela I know more things about him than I know about Edward. Guys who take advantage of girls don't talk to them like Carlisle talks to me.</p><p>"He's always telling me about himself, especially when I ask."</p><p>Something close to desperate overtook Angela's tone, "But Bella what if all that changes once you... y'know?"</p><p>Angela gave her a meaningful wide eyed expression and Bella found it kind of funny, at the same time she felt like Jasper may be right, Carlisle was probably nicer than her by a million light years,</p><p>"Oh, that's not a problem anymore we're fine. Nothings changed at all."</p><p>"Bella are you serious?" Angela actually seemed appalled by the confirmation of the fact that Bella and Carlisle were having sex.</p><p>"You were proudly proclaiming just last weekend that you hadn't."</p><p>The final bell rang.</p><p>"Yeah but then I had a week long trip with him to Alaska and it gets pretty cold at night y'know," Bella hissed out facetiously and her words were nearly completely covered up by the sound of their teacher, Mr. Berty, gently telling them all to shut the hell up an get their pencils out.</p><p>It was like Angela realized that they were talking about Carlisle, a man who was supposedly in his 30's, finally completely registered as she covered her mouth in something like horror.</p><p>"I'm sorry."</p><p>Bella swallowed back a sarcastic reply, instead she lowered her voice even more than before, "Don't be it was nice."</p><p>Angela was always kind above all things, her concern was righteous and she'd at least asked delicately over the matter even if it was a bit inappropriate to be discussing Bella's absent virginity in English class.</p><p>Fortunately it was not much later when they had their full assignments that Angela sighed, "I'm sorry if I offended you I'm just really worried about you and Bella, my life feels like it's falling apart because nobody wants to talk to me."</p><p>"Well I can assure you I have no more secrets left to tell," Bella replied a bit exhausted, one more necessary lie.</p><p>Angela seemed to appreciate it.</p><p> </p><hr/><p> </p><p>Bella braced herself like she was about to face Tyler's stupid van again as she and Angela made their way down the hall towards the front lawn. Dozens of students were headed out there for lunch and several seniors who got out, like Bella did, took to hanging out with their friends that were only a year or so behind them.</p><p>Every time she turned to look at Angela, who was talking about her plans to visit Leah in a day or so, Bella could see Lauren in the corner of her eye stalking them like some sort of house cat clumsily playing at being a lion.</p><p>Pushing the door opened Bella's feet hit the concrete just outside the pick up area where several dozen kids were just milling about.</p><p>Alice, of course, never lies and is barely wrong.</p><p>So when Lauren called out to her, poison dripping from her teeth like she herself was ravenous Bella only halted and hated. HATED that the girl had said,</p><p>"Isabella! OH Isabella! We're overdue for a chat!"</p><p>Angela, of course, looked horrified and Bella turned on her heel to face the blond girl who was made up perfectly and appeared everything fashionable and proper. A real blonde beauty.</p><p>"I don't think you want to do this Lauren."</p><p>"There it is," Lauren may have looked put together but her eyes were frantic like a wild creature who'd never been set free into the light in it's entire life,</p><p>"But I'm not going to take your no."</p><p>There were whole groups of silent teenagers looking at them like the apocalypse was about to happen and Bella wondered how many people knew that Lauren had her eyes set on the impossible goal of Fork's most Eligible Bachelor.</p><p>"Lauren, what the hell are you doing?!" Tyler swooped in and Bella was glad because this girl was clearly having some sort of breakdown. Bella knew, she was pretty sure that's what had happened to her in Alaska.</p><p>The boy tried to put his arms around the blonde in comfort to take her away or something but Lauren shoved Tyler off as she spat out, "Stop touching me Tyler! You're not my boyfriend!"</p><p>"That doesn't mean I can't care that you're making a scene!" Tyler countered clearly terrified of something happening and Bella wasn't sure what but Lauren ignored him as she marched towards the brunette.</p><p>Several small crowds had formed to watch the drama unfold.</p><p>"Tyler it's fine!" Bella hissed not wanting this whole thing to happen in public and reign down Principle Greene who, up until that moment, she had never had to deal with outside of the whole 'Bella almost died in the school parking lot' incident.</p><p>With that, Lauren grabbed hold of Bella's arm and dragged her to The Beast with so many gawkers that Bella couldn't even dream of counting them.</p><p>Bella reminded herself that Alice wouldn't have allowed this if Lauren was planning on murdering her, the brunette unlocked the truck for the other girl before loading herself into the driver's side.</p><p>"God we need to stop doing this, you know you're the only blond I know that's a nightmare," Bella grit her teeth as she tried to stay calm in the face of what was quickly looking like someone else's unraveling.</p><p>The very first thing that happened was Lauren screamed.</p><p>It was unholy and monstrous to the point that Bella gripped the steering wheel terrified, the stars in her dimmed before pulsing brighter.</p><p>Assuring.</p><p>"How did you do it?! " was what the blonde girl finally screeched instead of an actual question that made sense, though Bella had a horrible feeling that she knew exactly what Lauren was talking about.</p><p>A theory proven true when Lauren's green eyes grew manic, "You absolute <em>skank!</em> You just sat here and pretended to be innocent when you'd been screwing Dr. Cullen for- for- Who the hell knows how long?!</p><p>"Miss '<em>oh i don't care'</em> and <em>'don't talk about Edward's dad like that it's weird'</em>!</p><p>"It was supposed to be me! I'm so much hotter than you! So what the hell?! What the hell Swan?!"</p><p>Inhaling deeply Bella wished she could just tell Lauren precisely how many ways this whole scene was screwed from Sunday, but that would come off as hypocritical.</p><p>Honestly though, she didn't owe Lauren anything.</p><p>"I don't appreciate you reducing my appeal to how hot I am," Bella said instead because really what else could she say?! What could she say?!</p><p>"Oh god," Lauren tossed her head back and her head hit the truck's rear window making a 'thook' noise and Bella tried not to laugh at how close it sounded to a hollow bin,</p><p>"Don't tell me he's one of those creeps who likes virgins! God, I knew I shouldn't have put out to Ben in sophomore year!"</p><p>"He likes books," Bella still had no idea what to say to the absolute shit show that was unfolding as Lauren began bawling uncontrollable.</p><p>"It sucked too! I was spotting for days after and the bastard said I was such a sucky lay that he didn't want to take me to homecoming!"</p><p>"That's horrific," Bella muttered still unsure.</p><p>"God and I'm here flipping burgers trying to get out of this fucking town because my mom's screwing Dr. Foster and my dad's screwing probably everyone else!</p><p>"What the hell am I supposed to do?! Dad's blowing money left and right on his stupid girlfriends and mom's just trying to make sure she her claws in someone deep enough so that she doesn't have to actually start caring about money."</p><p>"Lauren, you can't chase 30 year old men you know nothing about because they're rich. It sucks, but that's how you ruin your life," she made an attempt, and Lauren looked at her like she was the devil himself.</p><p>"You would say that! You're the one screwing him!"</p><p>"I'm not- Lauren I'm not with Carlisle for his money," Bella began rubbing her forehead, she had a whole family meeting to deal with after...</p><p>Whatever the hell this was.</p><p>Lauren stared at her in near disgust, "Books?"</p><p>"And art," Bella replied a bit slowly, Lauren was practically a feral animal that needed to be approached cautiously with every word,</p><p>"He collects first editions, he started letting me read them. We started talking and then talking became arguing about what certain stories meant to say.</p><p>"And on my birthday he kissed me."</p><p>Silence.</p><p>Absolute quiet like the bottom of a pit echoed like madness as Lauren choked out, "Holy shit, that's really sweet."</p><p>And Bella was wrong in Soma because THIS.</p><p>This was what going mad felt like.</p><p>Lauren Mallory crying in her truck and saying,"I'm sorry, I just don't know what to do. God I just want to get out of here, this stupid fucking town and I can't.</p><p>"I'm going to be stuck here my whole life and I'll never be a model, all my dreams are just going to go up in flames because my stupid ass father keeps spending my college funds on weekends with his stupid girlfriends.</p><p>"Jessica's going to be valedictorian and Angela is going to get whatever second place is called, what do I care?! How the hell am I supposed to get into a good fashion school?! Huh?!</p><p>"I don't have the grades for scholarships! I don't have anything!"</p><p>"Lauren, why are you telling me all this?! I'm an actual stranger and it's kind of worrying me that you might not actually have anyone you can talk to" Bella glanced into her mirror and caught sight of Jasper casually leaning against her truck bed. Lauren hadn't noticed him but Bella thought she might soon.</p><p>"Bella, who the hell am I supposed to tell? Jessica? Yeah right! The whole school would know by tomorrow, the whole town would know by the next day!"</p><p>Lauren began wiping her tears and Bella wished she could help but there was already too much, so much happening in her life and another girl's problems would be far too much for her to take on on top of her own.</p><p>"I don't know what to say... I mean... I wish I could say something but I can't," Bella looked back at Jasper again and this time his eyes met her's.</p><p>Lauren noticed then and sighed, "I see your entourage has arrived."</p><p>"Yeah," Bella still was completely unsure of what even to do.</p><p>"Thanks for listening to me... and..." Lauren trailed and seemed to realize that Bella had effectively just sat there and did nothing.</p><p>"I should charge a premium," Bella shrugged and Lauren just shook her head.</p><p>"You won't tell anyone, I know. Because You don't care."</p><p>"Yep," Bella popped the 'p' and Lauren sighed as she got out of the truck, before slamming the door though she paused,</p><p>"This doesn't mean we're friends."</p><p>"I wouldn't presume," Bella trailed and then the blonde girl slammed the door, like she'd remembered from the last time.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0022"><h2>22. Chapter 22</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Sometimes you have to slow down</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Driving to the Cullens felt like crossing that expanse of space inside of her all the way to the next constellation. It wasn't so obvious or dramatic as before, as Carlisle being away had always taken the pulsing heat with him, but now no matter if he was by her side or somewhere else, Bella could feel those points of light between them shining gently.</p><p>Jasper and Alice trailed Bella on the empath's bike, and the Human girl was already feeling a bit tired from her half day but pushed it aside as she reminded herself that this was more important than whatever that had been with Lauren.</p><p>Popping The Beast in park, Bella climbed out of her truck only to have Alice and Jasper take their positions at her left and right respectively.</p><p>Their little trio made their way up into the comfort of home as Carlisle opened the door to greet them with a smile.</p><p>At least, he greeted Bella with a kiss and, "Welcome home Darling."</p><p>Alice and Jasper shuffled in past the them as Bella sighed, "Can I stay here forever? Because today was easily longer than the rest of my life."</p><p>Carlisle took her hand and nuzzled her nose as he offered, "If you need a moment to rest before our meeting no one will hold that against you."</p><p>Bella wasn't sure she wanted a Human moment right then so she sighed, "No, I don't want to put this off."</p><p>With a nod, Carlisle led her to the living room and Bella once more found herself tucked into his side on the love seat which faced the entire living room.</p><p>Rosalie offered tight smile while Emmett's own grin was wide enough to show off his distinct dimples,</p><p>"Damn I feel like I haven't' seen you in ages Bella! Good to have you Ma'."</p><p>"Thank you Emmett," Bella tried to offer her own light smile as Jasper and Alice took their places standing next to the sofa Rosalie and Emmett were residing on. Edward was sitting cross legged on the floor and Bella was happy to see Kate and Irina sort of just idling by the sound system.</p><p>"I'm glad you're here Kate, Irina, it's good to see you two so soon, even if it's not for the best reasons," Bella offered lightly glad to see the pair were able to make the small trip.</p><p>"Yeah well it's not like we can trust Emmett with you," Irina teased lightly as she tossed a rather saucy look at the boy in question.</p><p>"Not my fault I've only got room for one lady in my head," Emmett joked right back and Irina simply rolled her eyes in faux disgust as the claim got the curly haired boy kissed by Rosalie who looked brimming with smugness.</p><p>"Can we start?" Edward sort of piped up clearly more worried than everyone else seemed to be and Bella wondered if there was a reason for it.</p><p>"Alright Edward," Carlisle nodded slowly as he took a firmer hold of Bella's hand which caused her own concern to spike at the gesture,</p><p>"Rosalie, you informed me that you have something to say before we begin?"</p><p>"Last night Emmett and I caught Victoria and Laurent's scents while out hunting with our Cousins," Rosalie took the floor starting the meeting without flourish or pomp, the blonde Vampire sat up bit straighter as she pursed her lips,</p><p>"With Bella's sighting of Victoria and the fact that the trail went past the border..."</p><p>"It's clear they're trying to mess with us," Jasper hissed through gritted teeth and as what that meant washed over her, Bella felt like gravity was going to keep her where she was until time turned her to stone and the rain weathered her away.</p><p>"Between our Coven and the Wolves they must be having a hell of a time," Bella frowned pushing passed the sudden heaviness that was weighing on her and felt like there was something else,</p><p>"I mean, with Alice's Visions, Jasper's' tactical know how, and Edward's telepathy there's no way you guys shouldn't have caught them."</p><p>Jasper was beginning to nod slowly, the gears in his head visibly shifting, "The Wolves have superior tracking, probably even better than James. There's no way..."</p><p>"You think one of them has a Gift that's making it hard for us to get to them?" Edward hissed out in disbelief as if he'd yanked it out of Jasper's head.</p><p>Carlisle looked between Bella and their empathic son, his expression tight, "That's reasonable to assume."</p><p>"Hold on," Emmett put his hands up a bit as if to request everyone back up, "Who the hell blabbed to Bella about the Wolves!? It wasn't me!"</p><p>"Emmett, now's not the time," Carlisle's was gentle but it was clear he didn't want the conversation to get sidetracked and for them all to end up on a verbal fairy trail. Bella leaned into him a bit more and-</p><p>"Carlisle I know she's your wife but the Wolves won't see it as we do, they don't follow our customs," Kate's tone was quivering and Bella could see genuine terror overtaking the beautiful woman's features as her hands clenched. Irina too had stiffened slightly and begun looking around as if they'd be invaded at any moment.</p><p>"Jacob Black told me," Bella decided that it was necessary to keep things on track as she cast Carlisle a bit of an apologetic smile for taking part in the wandering conversation,</p><p>"He told me about you being Vampires too. Explicitly he said Vampires."</p><p>Carlisle chimed in easily, completing what she was trying to convey, "So we can deal with the broken treaty later. They are the guilty party."</p><p>Kate and Irina relaxed as the former let out a small sigh of relief as the latter crossed her arm and shook her head,</p><p>"What a stupid mutt."</p><p>"He's my friend," Bella exhaled and it filled her cheeks before slowly steaming out then she released it all at once,</p><p>"But, since we've brought them up, and they've been hunting the same target..."</p><p>"Bella," Jasper shook his head and sort of looked at her like her type of crazy had just sort of leapfrogged off his own a little too far down the path,</p><p>"We can't trust them."</p><p>"He hurt you," Carlisle reminded her softly, his tone was calm and soothing but Bella remembered how her Mate truly felt, "He marked your skin because he was upset that you were engaging in an activity that he deemed unsafe, even though you had passed through the actual dive unscathed."</p><p>There was a sharp intake of breath all around and Rosalie actually growled like a mighty rolling thunder as she stood to her feet like a shot,</p><p>"And you didn't say anything Carlisle?! That's your Mate!"</p><p>Carlisle took a slow breath and turned to Rosalie, like still waters with infinite depth he reminded his daughter, "They don't follow our customs Kitty, their Elder's wouldn't see Jacob Black's actions as harming a member of our Coven."</p><p>A pet name.</p><p>Bella tried not to think it was the cutest thing in the world as she added, "I don't see how at least informing them a little about Victoria and Laurent would do any harm.</p><p>"If anything it'll increase the chances of catching them."</p><p>"Isabella," Carlisle turned to her then as he seemed to try and form the words he needed, His eyes were bright and Bella could see that he wished to simply agree,</p><p>"Our relationship with the current pack is virtually nonexistent. If it were Ephraim's pack, meeting would be simple. A request via letter and we'd meet at the gorge but there is no trust with the current Wolves.</p><p>"They do not know us and I doubt they would agree to a parlay."</p><p>"But I know them, if they're who I think they are then all of those guys grew up with Jacob and have known Charlie all their lives," Bella replied, feeling something like willfulness stake itself into her,</p><p>"And Harry, Billy, I grew up with them too. They're on the Council and I know they'll at least listen to me a little if we try to talk bluntly and stop dancing around it."</p><p>Pressing his lips together Carlisle seemed to weigh her with his eyes as if he agreed but did not want to vocalize it, as if he nearly couldn't manage what that would entail. Jasper though had no qualms as he spoke up with a tone nearing hope,</p><p>"Having Established yourself as our Matriarch you would have the authority to speak on our behalf."</p><p>"That's only if the Bond is Fully Established," Rosalie countered Bella realized a few things.</p><p>Alice knew because she'd probably done her best to avoid seeing the details because how close she'd been watching Bella's future recently. Edward knew because Bella wasn't under the illusion that Carlisle hadn't thought about it.</p><p>She'd thought about it.</p><p>A few times.</p><p>Jasper knew because he was Jasper. The empath probably heard them apologizing to Esme.. Kate and Irina had thought they were being intimate before they got to Alaska.</p><p>Which was probably why they looked at Rosalie a bit askance as if the girl was talking nonsense.</p><p>"It is, so it's not an issue," Carlisle quickly informed her which caused Rosalie stare at them like they'd killed someone for a thrill of it and tossed them into the lake.</p><p>"Carlisle!" Rosalie was clearly distraught and Bella found herself moving without thinking. Perhaps it was the devastated tone or the way Rosalie's eyes looked like they were somewhere else, some when else. Or even just the sight of someone she was growing to love being in distress.</p><p>Whatever it was, Bella brought herself before Rosalie and took her cold dainty hands before offering an assuring smile, "I'm safe, we're fine. Carlisle hasn't hurt me."</p><p>Rosalie looked ready to march passed her and attempt to tear Carlisle's arm off before smacking him with it but instead of that, the blonde clenched her teeth so hard that Bella could see the other girl's jaw trembling.</p><p>Absently, she wondered how many people were going to try and bring up her sex life.</p><p>She was pretty sure most people didn't suffer through this many issues. At least Rosalie was worried about something reasonable though. Lord knew Bella was glad someone besides Carlisle had immediately worried about the possibility of her being crushed.</p><p>He was right it seemed, about them practically deifying his self control.</p><p>Everyone else just accepted he'd have the self control to do the deed without issue which was sort of horrifying when Bella had experienced the many trials of getting to where they were.</p><p>"Can we get back on the Wolves?" Kate clicked her tongue a bit impatiently and when Rosalie looked ready to snarl Bella squeezed her hand,</p><p>"We can talk a bit later alright?"</p><p>Rosalie was obviously dissatisfied but gave a sharp nod as she settled herself back down on the couch with Emmett. Cold hands covered Bella's shoulders and she realized Carlisle had come up behind her as he pressed his lips delicately to the back of her head and said,</p><p>"I truly feel that sending Bella to the Quileutes to set up a meeting is the best option. She will only have to relay a small amount of information on Victoria and Laurent, including a time and place for a meeting while also displaying the trust and authority she has within our family."</p><p>"If she's gonna give them the information, why do we even need a meeting?" Emmett sighed a bit petulantly as if he felt he was out of the loop. Bella wondered that he could not see what she was beginning to.</p><p>"Because Alice doesn't know where the Vision is taking place, she still hasn't figured it out," Bella reminded him and Jasper tossed her a smug grin.</p><p>"And that means the Vision with Bella being attacked likely takes place in Wolf country," Jasper explained easily off her observation.</p><p>"No, No no no," Edward was shaking his head and appeared like they'd just told him he was going to have to have a tea party with them all and be forced to eat the cakes,</p><p>"We are not relaxing our borders."</p><p>"For Isabella," Carlisle reminded him and Bella was surprised by the weight of his words and how much he hid in them, how he appeared so cold regarding the situation as he blatantly put her above everything else.</p><p>Edward sighed but didn't protest again as Jasper pinched the bridge of his nose, "I know this is the best option or Alice would have said something, but I don't like it one bit.</p><p>"As much as I want to be able to keep you safe I keep wishing there was another way."</p><p>Alice looped her arm through Jasper's in silent support and Bella too wished there was another way. That they could do this on their own without dragging even more people into her mess but if the Cullens were going to be able to protect her.</p><p>Protect Charlie.</p><p>Then the Quileutes would have to be informed of everything that was going on.</p><p>"And what about the 'Bella has to drive herself to school' Rule," Edward spoke up and she knew it was a matter of time before someone did. Because that left her vulnerable for the entire drive.</p><p>It was one thing to only have Wednesday, because if Bella was attacked in her truck on her way to or from school Alice would know it was a Wednesday and they could plan accordingly. With her driving everyday there was a problem.</p><p>"I'll trail her trip," Alice volunteered immediately as if she felt personally responsible for the situation and Bella's heart ached at that.</p><p>"Edward should do it," Jasper argued softly, as if he didn't want to hurt his Mate's feelings, "He's got a wider and more reliable range as well as speed. You'd be good but I think Edward will be better."</p><p>Pouting a bit the tiny girl nodded as if she could see that he was correct, perhaps she could.</p><p>"Alright," Edward accepted the assignment without fuss but Bella could tell he was still disgruntled regarding everything esle going on at the moment.</p><p>"Are there any more issues we need to discuss?" Carlisle opened the floor but no one was forthcoming with any of their own topics so the Patriarch ended the meeting. Bella turned to him and pulled on his shirt so that he would lean down for a kiss, which was easily granted.</p><p>Before she could enjoy it to it's end though Bella felt a chilled arm wrap around her own as Rosalie was practically sneering,</p><p>"Alright, break it up. I was promised a talk."</p><p>Bella pulled away and huffed out a laugh as Carlisle clearly appeared miffed at being interrupted.</p><p>"Hold that thought," Bella commanded teasingly as she let Rosalie drag her out to the second floor balcony, perhaps to give the illusion of privacy. She appreciated the gesture since they would no doubt be discussing more delicate topics while they had a full house.</p><p>Though, she was surprised when Kate and Irina showed up just as they did, Rosalie appeared equally startled by the turn of the tables as she heaved a gravely sigh,</p><p>"No, you two aren't staying for this."</p><p>"C'mon!" Kate grinned like this was going to be a slumber party in the middle of the afternoon, "Carlisle would never give us details and this is the closest thing we'll get!</p><p>"I mean, really! He's practically been a monk his whole life and now he fulfilling Bella's fantasies of playing Doctor."</p><p>"That's disturbing," Bella muttered because this was about assuring Rosalie and not gossiping about how good Carlisle was in bed, the worst part was that Kate had wiggled her eyebrows suggestively.</p><p>"Maybe she's more into the Priest thing," Irina sounded so close to losing it completely and Bella was beginning to feel mortified,</p><p>"Forgive me Father for I have sinned!"</p><p>Kate laughed heartily and Bella really was mortified when she said, "More like: Sorry Daddy I've been naughty!"</p><p>“Enough!” Bella put her hands up and just knew, she just knew that her entire body had lit up like a neon light the color of a fire engine as she tried not to choke at how the other ladies were taking.</p><p>God.</p><p>“We are not talking about my fantasies!”</p><p>“Let’s talk about mine,” Irina winked a bit too licentiously as she sighed, “How bout a mountain man with a Gift that could even out a 3 to 1 fight.”</p><p>Bella groaned loud and long, “We’re not talking about anyone’s fantasies!”</p><p>It was quickly becoming out of hand and she had no idea what to do. Especially when Rosalie began laughing like a child, as if everything was suddenly alright now that these two had decided to scandalize Bella Swan six ways from Sunday.</p><p>“Awww,” Kate pouted a bit facetiously as she trudged on anyways which caused Rosalie to laugh even harder,</p><p>“I just want a guy who’s tall and won’t mind that I can kick his ass.”</p><p>“Wow Kate, those are mind blowing standards,” Bella sighed, feeling defeated as she did. Fortunately Rosalie gathered herself together enough speak up.</p><p>“You two, C’mon, you know she’s not going to tell you anything. Bella’s not the kind of girl who kisses and tells.”</p><p>Even worse, was when Alice sort of just traipsed in walking the railing like a tight rope holding a glass bottled coke, "If we're having girl talk there is no way I'm being left out."</p><p>With that, she very sprightly hopped onto the balcony with a bright grin as the Tiny Vampire offered Bella the coke, "I just kicked all the guys out and we'll be good until whenever you're ready to leave!"</p><p>Bella took the soda and sighed a bit, this...</p><p>This shouldn't be too bad right?</p><p>Then, she realized that this would be the first time she really talked about her relationship with anyone who approved and she wasn't having it to justify it all too.</p><p>"Girl talk is healthy," Alice cheered as Bella took a sip of her drink and as she looked at the expectant golden eyes around her, the Human girl gave in completely.</p><p>"First, Rosalie," Bella swallowed her fizzy drink and took a breath, "Carlisle and I have been building up to intimacy since my birthday and had planned to Established the Bond very closely to telling Charlie so that we wouldn't have to worry about it.</p><p>"We established it in Alaska."</p><p>"The torn mattress!" Kate squealed gleefully, "Are you kidding?! That's all the damage he did the first time?! God he's like, like-"</p><p>"Inhuman," Bella muttered snarkily as she took another sip and wished she was old enough to get drunk for this conversation. Kate replied with a even and unimpressed expression which Bella only smiled rather unsympathetically in response. Really what had she been expecting?</p><p>“Alright,” Rosalie nodded a bit somberly now that all her laughter had subsided over the ridiculousness the Denalis had brought with them,</p><p>“We know Blood isn’t problem so.. I guess we’ll just have to trust he’ll maintain his self control for the next half a decade.”</p><p>“Which is really nothing,” Alice reminded them all as she casually leaned back against the railing,</p><p>“I mean Carlisle performs surgeries and he’s never even flinched.”</p><p>Bella snorted as she remembered that he hadn’t been able to breath at all while they had sex until the last time they’d shared each other in Alaska. Which was a mistake because everyone was looking at her like she was about to spill the beans that Carlisle was actually a, heaven forbid, <em>man</em>.</p><p>“I’m Fort Knox, if you want details get them from Edward,” Bella took a swig of her drink and really desperately wished she was 21,</p><p>“Talk about something else, maybe Kate’s amazing standards of any guy who’s over 5 foot 4 and Irina’s idealized version of Emmett.”</p><p>That had Rosalie snorting and it would have been derisively if it wasn’t coated in so much clear amusement, “Trust me Irina, you couldn’t handle a man like Emmett.”</p><p>“Maybe I want a guy that’s too hot to handle, I’ve waited long enough! Carlisle’s only waited 340 years and, if Eleazar is correct, he’s practically got a Goddess on legs.”</p><p>Pressing her coke bottle to her forehead, Bella tried not to turn even redder or else she was sure she’d just pass out from high blood pressure as Alice hummed,</p><p>“I’m fortunate that Jasper was the one who had to wait for me!”</p><p>Rosalie grinned like a cat as she very smugly reminded them all, “Does it really count as waiting when I was only a Vampire for a year when I found Emmett?”</p><p>“No,” Bella was shocked as she, Irina, and Kate all said the words at once like some sort of choir.</p><p>“One of us!” Irina cheered brightly like it was the best thing that had ever happened since the inception of non slip sneakers.</p><p>“One of us!” Kate more sedately chuckled as Alice and Rosalie just rolled their eyes. Bella found herself relaxing and wasn't that funny?</p><p>She hadn’t felt this easy all day, save for when she’d been kissing Carlisle. It was nice to just sit there and let a conversation wash over you. Perhaps this was why her mother liked ‘Boy Talk’ so much and Bella always dreaded it like it was some sort of unholy blight on the earth.</p><p>This wasn’t just ‘Boy Talk’ thought was it?</p><p>Irina and Kate were sharing their hopes and dreams about the people they wanted to one day spend forever with. The ones they closed their eyes and had hoped to find for a thousand years.</p><p>Dying to meet them for a thousand years.</p><p>“Fine, tall, willing to worship me because I can kick his ass, and has a heart of silver because I do not want a heart of gold. I need excitement in my life,” Kate announced firmly and Bella found herself overwhelmed with how she managed to still be so vague as the Human girl began chuckling.</p><p>Alice though pursed her lips seeming equally unimpressed, “Wait, so now he has to worship you? What happened to just acceptance?”</p><p>“I decided not to fantasize halfway,” Kate shrugged noncommittally and Bella lost it completely Rosalie rolled her eyes at the blase attitude.</p><p>"Alright," Alice sighed and looked at Irina, "What gift then? C'mon you have to have some sort of fantasy even if you don't get it?"</p><p>"I don't know!" Irina gave a nearly genuine shrug but there was actually a shyness there in her eyes and Bella realized that perhaps she was a bit more reserved than her easy going sister.</p><p>"Alright," Bella lifted her coke bottle, "I'm instituting a cone of no-shame. Putting it down right now."</p><p>"So what?" Rosalie shook her head slightly as if she didn't understand but Alice squealed like a kid on Christmas,</p><p>"It means that we each share something shamelessly and we can't judge each other for it!"</p><p>"Exactly," taking as sip of her drink Bella confirmed it as Irina smiled at the Human girl before informing her,</p><p>"I really like you now."</p><p>"I try."</p><p>"I'll go first!" Rosalie stepped forwards like she was approaching the plate and was up to bat, "Me and Emmett have a running counter on how many beds we can break in a decade. So far we've gotten away with 12 before Carlisle took us aside and said, <em>'Please Stop I know your'e doing this on purpose'.</em>"</p><p>That.</p><p>That had Bella absolutely rolling right next to Irina while the others looked at them like they were insane for finding it so funny. Though, for Bella, it was less about the thing itself, but the fact that Carlisle had said anything at all with his easy tone and manner, clearly desperate to save the beds for some unknown reason.</p><p>As Rosalie stepped back Kate stepped up to the plate and cleared her throat delicately as she sort of wiggled like she was bracing herself or something,</p><p>"Once, Tanya and I decided to have a competition to see who could seduce the daughter of the Mayor of a townage were were in at some point in the 1800s and she ended up asking to be with both of us at once and we immediately realized she was way too much for us to handle."</p><p>"Holy shit," Rosalie covered her mouth with such glee at the thought of the Denalis being out played by an incredibly lusty human.</p><p>"I would have done it if she hadn't ask for the other one to be my sister! Honestly!" Kate was obviously still amused by the whole thing and Bella shook her head at the horrifying scenario but could see the humor in it.</p><p>Alice sort of danced to the center and very primly declared, "Now maybe I'm not as exciting as you all but Jasper and I keep track of the cars we've christened as well as the continents."</p><p>Bella wondered at that.</p><p>These actual wild hearts were sharing such crazy things, she wasn't going to be able to compete at all! And this had been her idea! Bella reminded herself that this was just sharing shamelessly and wasn't a competition. They all knew she was still fairly virginal compared to all of their experiences.</p><p>Irina decided Bella would go last as she sighed and took her turn, "Mine's a fantasy! When I find my Mate I want him and I to go on a whirlwind tour of Europe and claim all my favorite cities for ourselves!"</p><p>That...</p><p>That was really kind of sweet.</p><p>Bella knew she wasn't supposed to say anything though so when Irina stepped down, the Human downed the rest of her soda in one go, mustering all the courage she'd learned from this family, Bella declared,</p><p>"I'm making plans to get Carlisle alone in the forest with me, a blanket, and my truck. Because I have plans for my truck bed. A lot of plans."</p><p>That was apparently enough to have them all laughing like it was the funniest thing in the universe to imagine Carlisle and her making like a country song.</p><p>So Bella did her best to fight down the blush that was once more overtaking her.</p><p>In the end the whole thing was pretty fun.</p><p>Surprisingly so.</p><p>She felt infinitely better than when she'd gotten off school so, as they all began chatting again in earnest, Bella counted it as a win.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0023"><h2>23. Chapter 23</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>You're a crazy bitch, but you're MY crazy bitch.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>With everything that had happened, none of the Cullens seemed bothered by Bella's decision to make her visit to the Reservation on Tuesday.</p><p>When Bella left the Cullens house she called Charlie and informed him she'd be home directly as her plans had shifted. Her father sounded only slightly perturbed by the information but he did not argue it nor did he push her to visit her friend despite her tiredness.</p><p>He did not even say anything on the subject through their stilted dinner together.</p><p>That night, when Carlisle climbed in through her window and Bella was brushing her hair before bed she immediately turned to him and sighed as she realized this was the second night in a row he came so early.</p><p>"How are things at the Hospital?" was the first thing out of her mouth because at that point it was the one thing she was actually willing to worry about. Carlisle hummed as he pulled off his shoes casually, as if he himself wasn't quite sure how to say it.</p><p>"I've been offered two options," He finally sighed as he laid back onto her pillows before swinging his legs up on top of her duvet,</p><p>"Our Chief Physician Dr. Gerandy cannot have me fired for the reasons I've already mentioned, and while the board will find our relationship a bit scandalous it is nothing to act so harshly regarding. It is not as if I took advantage of you when you were under the Hospital's Care...</p><p>"So, the choices I have been given are to reduce my shifts until the gossip cools down, or I may take a sabbatical and return in a year to see how the court of public opinion has ruled."</p><p>Bella heaved out a sigh, they knew this might happen. Carlisle had said he wouldn't be fired but there were so many other things that could be done.</p><p>"What are you going to do?"</p><p>"I was hoping to ask your opinion," Carlisle revealed and something in Bella heated up all at once as she put her brush away before turning off her main light.</p><p>As she crawled into bed with him she leaned herself into his cool, unyielding form as his scent overwhelmed her,</p><p>"I don't want you to give up working. We're not guilty of anything, especially now that Charlie's allowing it. Even if he doesn't approve."</p><p>It was true, they needed to present themselves as shameless and without fear. If they acted as if they had something to hide, people would begin to think they were right and he had taken advantage. Seduced her with promises of material gain in exchange for him to slake his hungers against her innocence.</p><p>Tenderly, slowly, Carlisle began running his slender fingers through her hair with almost an intense focus on the act of it, " But, it is strategically a better decision to take the sabbatical.</p><p>"I will be able to spend all night, every night with you. No more half hour visits when I work a night shift and I will always be here when you wake, until Edward trails you to school."</p><p>"Look," Bella sighed as she gazed into his copper eyes which shone in the low light of her lamp on the nightstand, he seemed to be a little thirsty but it was not an issue if they were only going to be talking,</p><p>"I get it. You want to protect me, but we can't pretend people aren't watching the family right now. If we start acting like we need to hide they'll only start looking closer."</p><p>"What if it means I cannot be there?" Carlisle's voice was bordering on desperate, as if he was genuinely afraid he would not have the chance to come to her when the time came.</p><p>When Alice's Vision struck.</p><p>“You know Alice would never let you accept a shift if it meant I would be hurt,” Bella reminded him and tried her best to imbue as much confidence in the prescient girl as she could,</p><p>“You’re being unreasonable again.”</p><p>“Only because it is you,” he breathed coolly against her neck before nuzzling it ever so intimately. Bella leaned back into his comforting touch.</p><p>“I know.”</p><p>Going to school the next day had felt like experiencing bugs tunneling under her skin while Jessica grit her teeth in the distance and Lauren acted like nothing had ever happened.</p><p>Something had to give though and Bella wasn't going to borrow trouble by worrying bout things that only MIGHT happen when she had a myriad of other things on her plate. So, it was with that attitude that she bid goodbye to Edward and Angela after English, proceeded to hop into her truck before heading down to the Reservation with the knowledge that the telepath would likely be trailing her until she reached the Treaty Line.</p><p>It almost felt like riding off to battle as she cranked up the shitty radio that only picked up the local stations and were playing a bunch of local bands in their afternoon spotlight. The last time she'd gone down this road was with Leah and Angela as they'd set off for Cliff Diving.</p><p>An activity that might as well have been a decade ago for all it was really about a week and a half.</p><p>Which meant Bella wasn't even half done with her stitches.</p><p>Wonderful.</p><p>Yet, she was barreling down the road trying to focus on the sound of star shine which echoed between her and Carlisle wherever he happened to be at the moment. He likely wasn't at the hospital.</p><p>Bella reminded herself that they'd known this might happen.</p><p>They'd walked into this with no illusions and eyes wide opened, even if they weren't supposed to have everyone knowing at the same time as Charlie did.</p><p>It was with a buzzing mind and heart that Bella pulled her truck in front of the Black Residence. She took a calming breath before feeling a bright flash like a nebula forming from two stars crashing together as if both she and Carlisle had needed comfort together all at once.</p><p>A new, but very welcome as well as assuring, sensation which swept up from her toes all the way into her marrow up past the crown of her head like a light shining out from the earth beneath Bella's feet.</p><p>She slammed the door and trudged with purpose towards the home.</p><p>Bella knocked three times and waited. She listened, her ears managed to pick up a bit of shuffling, the sound of Billy's wheel chair rolling against the wood paneled floor. Finally the door opened and revealed the man himself.</p><p>Before she could say anything, Billy's brown piercing, judging eyes nailed her to the ground as he worked his jaw and informed her, "Jacob is out with friends. You should leave."</p><p>Then, Bella tore away the velvet curtain they had been setting the stage behind every time they'd waltzed around the issue which had remained unspoken since that day in the kitchen when she'd refused him. Told Billy it was too late for her to go back.</p><p>This time though, it was a patent truth.</p><p>"I'm not here for Jacob, I'm here on behalf of the Cullens to give the Pack information on the Vampires they've been hunting."</p><p>"So they have decided that they will show no shame in this crime they have decided to commit," Billy spoke and it held the solemness only the River Styx could match for how it flowed,</p><p>"And this. The most heinous of abominations, for that Doctor to take a child and call her Mate."</p><p>"Billy, I'm here for the Pack," Bella stood her ground, she knew who she was, even if sometimes it felt like it wasn't enough. At the moment she needed to at least pretend to be.</p><p>"And who told you about the Pack Bella?" the man's eyes burned with accusation as if he knew exactly what she would say as she did her best to stand up straight.</p><p>"The same person who told me the Cullens were Vampires," Bella made sure to make her breath slow,</p><p>"Jacob."</p><p>All the emotion drained from Billy Black's face in an instant as the words likely sunk into his mind. Like a betrayal, or perhaps something softer, as the boy was his son.</p><p>Perhaps like a slap to the face?</p><p>Slowly he closed his eyes and took a breath before he opened them, still they were hard as granite, "Tell me Bella. What do you see in the eyes of a creature who goes through life pretending to be something it is not.</p><p>"Even when no one is looking it lies to itself and says it is not a killer."</p><p>"I see goodness," Bella replied, no thought or contemplation as she knew that every time she gazed into her lover's eyes she saw entire worlds that had been crafted just to contain him,</p><p>"Because if you do something when you're all alone, even when no one else can see, it stops being an act and becomes who you are."</p><p>Silence passed between them for a beat, then another as Billy heaved out a great sigh as if he did no know what to do, or say in the face of her determination. He managed though as he finally replied, with unease,</p><p>"There are worse things than your Christian concept of hell, and becoming like them is one of them. You can leave, break whatever magic hold he has on you before he seals it by destroying your spirit and encasing it in stone."</p><p>Bella would not let him do this, avoid her request and reject her choice. This was it.</p><p>"The fight you think you need to wage is already over," she informed him softly, and knew it had to break his heart but Billy's heart was not one under her protection,</p><p>"Nothing can destroy it. Even fire until he is ash will not end his hold on me."</p><p>Shuddering Billy bowed his head as she let out a noise somewhere between a sigh and groan of sadness, like a man who had not realized that he had been gambling on a miracle only to lose,</p><p>"I will take you to the Wolves, but Sam will demand answers of you."</p><p>"I'm ready to answer what I can," Bella informed him with all the determination she could muster and Billy nodded as if she was a ghost that had informed him what time her funeral would be, as if she was already gone from him and lost to the dense dark wood forever.</p><p>He told her the way.</p><p>Bella listened carefully and Billy instructed her on how to get to the Uley house which the boys were using as their base of operations. Carefully she took note of it and as she climbed back into her truck Billy called out one last time to her as if in a desperate plea,</p><p>"You may think you are brave or somehow contain more good than others for loving a Cold Creature, but you are not. Foolishness is not bravery and blindness is not goodness."</p><p>"Billy, I know exactly how greedy and selfish I am," Bella replied and she felt like her teeth were as razor sharp as the ones which grazed her flesh in passion on the mornings Charlie was not home,</p><p>"You don't have to remind me."</p><p>With that she slammed her door and drove away from her father's best friend. A man she knew cared for her nearly like a third daughter if only for Charlie's sake. Perhaps there was a tragedy in it.</p><p>But he had known.</p><p>Perhaps not who had captured her and danced away with her heart only to swallow it whole, but Billy had known she was spending her days with Vampires.</p><p>Vampires only wanted two things from Humans.</p><p>And Bella was so <em>alive!</em></p><p>He should have fought harder sooner if he truly believed her so at risk.</p><p>The road to the Uley house was unfamiliar to her as most of her childhood in Forks, at least the part spent on the Quileute Reservation, was spent between the Black and Clearwater Properties.</p><p>So the Uley house had the benefit of the fact that she did not associate it with fond childhood memories and dreams. Bella could think of it as a completely new place separate from those days she spent with Jacob in her childhood.</p><p>Well worn was the path to the property and Bella was glad for it as she pulled out front and parked. She'd been given her duty and there was only so much information she could share.</p><p>Especially on Bonds.</p><p>It felt so private she didn't think she could answer Sam's questions if they got deeper than simply if they existed and how powerful it was.</p><p>The house itself was well kept and the property expertly groomed. It's pine finish paired beautifully with the forest which surrounded the home from behind. Bella judged that it was likely a few bedrooms, perhaps two or three with an upstairs. The model was similar to Billy's own home and she wondered how the interior differed.</p><p>Bella knew she shouldn't have been surprised, but she still was, when 3 boys in cut off shorts and tank tops piled out of the house. She fought back the sensation in her throat that was akin to having swallowed a whole entire lemon, peel and all, as she realized Jacob was the flying point on the trio.</p><p>"Bella what the hell are you doing here?!" Jacob hissed like she'd came at him with a knife as she ignored the words in order to climb out of the cab of her truck and round the front.</p><p>Carlisle's coat still pulled around her and Bella tightened it's coverage as she replied with all the stubbornness she could,</p><p>"I'm here for parlay on behalf of the Cullens. So, unless you're in charge I'm not here for you Jacob."</p><p>"Bella don't be stupid!" Jacob was gritting his teeth as if she'd just declared she was running for Governor of Washington with the plan on funding her campaign with a bake sale,</p><p>"This is not you, it's whatever that freak Dr. Fang's done to you."</p><p>Bella roved her eyes over the boys and smiled as she did in fact recognize Embry and Quil. They were taller and much bigger than the last time she saw them, what felt like ages ago at that bonfire,</p><p>"I just said I'm here for parlay. This isn't about my relationship with Carlisle, not entirely."</p><p>"The hell it isn't!" Jacob took a step towards her and instinctively, Bella took a step back in fear as her body and mind recalled the last time he'd made such a violent move.</p><p>"Jacob!" harsh was the call and neither Quil or Embry has said it. The voice had come from the direction of the house, so Bella turned her head to find a young man she wasn't acquainted with, but was much larger than the rest though, his clothing was similar,</p><p>"What is the meaning of this?!"</p><p>"Bella just showed up man," Embry shrugged a bit as Quil backed away a smidgen as if he wanted no part in the chaos which was about to unfold.</p><p>"I've come on behalf of the Cullens to offer information regarding the Vampires your Pack has been hunting as well as request a meeting of our groups to determine what's to be done about them."</p><p>The older boy looked her up and down, judging and fierce, “Who told you about the Pack?!”</p><p>“Jacob,” Bella replied immediately before any accusations could fly in her face and cause any arguments or unnecessary rage,</p><p>“He’s also the one who told me about the Cullens being Vampires. So, that will have to be addressed too.”</p><p>This young man’s eyes appeared livid and he took huge breath as if to calm himself from whatever anger was about to over take him before shooting Jacob a stern glare,</p><p>“Is this true? Did you break the Treaty?!”</p><p>“It was before!” Jacob defended, and it would have sounded weak if it wasn’t so desperate as he gestured towards Bella like simply because they’d grown up together she should be an exception. Her childhood friend then turned his eyes to her, they contained something sick inside as he spat,</p><p>“Besides, I’m sure they were ecstatic when you told them you knew.”</p><p>“I’m here for a discussion on the invading Vampires,” Bella reminded them, this was not a conversation she was going to let wander as the Bond inside her had several stars which were distant from her pulsing like a drum beat.</p><p>"What do they care about having more Blood Drinkers around? It's not like they're in competition," Quil snorted a bit irreverently as if it was all some big joke. Bella tried to remind herself that they didn’t know.</p><p>That Charlie’s life may be in danger.</p><p>“Quil...” the young man who had questioned her knowledge of them offered a warning, but it was gentle as the younger boy just gave a half shrug practically unapologetic at his antics.</p><p>"Are you in charge here?" Bella asked hoping to cut to the heart of the matter. Carlisle would likely call her and ask how it all went and with the way he’d been acting the night before it would be sooner rather than later.</p><p>She also asked because these boys were supernatural beings and there was no ways that Bella was going to mess up with the Hierarchy.</p><p>"I am," the young man nodded, "I'm Sam, Sam Uley. Quil, as much as he was joking, is right. What do they care? And why send you?"</p><p>"Yeah why send their Human pet?" another boy joined them from out of the house and Jacob snarled,</p><p>"Shut up Paul."</p><p>"They care because Victoria and Laurent are out to kill me, and I’m here because Charlie is in danger because of it," Bella replied frankly, not willing to play games or risk losing their interest in the subject with a runaround,</p><p>"And I matter to them because Carlisle and I share a Mating Bond."</p><p>There it was, all out there for them to judge and weigh. Sam's expression shifted, only minutely and Bella wondered at it. How his eyes had grown less harsh and a bit deeper as if he'd perhaps drawn into his own head.</p><p>Any answers on the subject of Sam's opinion would have to be put off as Jacob to scoffed, "So what?! That's it?! He says you have some sort of Bond and you just go along with it?!"</p><p>"Jacob!" Sam scolded one more time and the boy in question began to seethe at being ordered around. It was so much different to the Cullens who moved and obeyed the Coven's power structure even when Bella herself couldn't enforce her place with her frail Human form.</p><p>"Follow me inside," Sam addressed Bella then and the girl nodded as the apparent leader of the Pack lead her into the house while Jacob and the other boys followed grumpily. She tried not to feel nervous in a house full of strangers. Jacob was there, but their last meeting hadn’t exactly been ideal.</p><p>Paul, who was still on the porch, waited for Sam to pass into the house with Bella before he fell into step with the others.</p><p>"This is Emily," with a small gesture out Sam indicated a young woman just a bit older than him who looked to be setting the table for a late lunch. Sam wrapped an arm around her waist only to kiss her tenderly in a manner which was clearly meant to inform Bella of exactly what Emily was to him.</p><p>As if she wasn’t perfectly aware of it already.</p><p>Absently Bella wondered why Emily was allowed into this world when Leah hadn’t been. What made her so different or special?</p><p>When the couple separated, and all the boys, save for Jacob and Sam, settled around the table. Bella chose to remain standing nearest to the door to face them fully for the conversation that needed to be had.</p><p>"So you're the Vampire girl," Emily greeted and it was clearly meant to be kind. Bella could have been cruel and replied with 'and you're Leah's cousin' but knew better. No matter how upset Jacob had made her, she was representing the entire Olympic Coven.</p><p>"And you're the Wolf Girl, it seems."</p><p>Emily ducked her head and blushed a bit as Sam once more demanded Bella's attention by saying, "So. What makes this so called Bond so important that the Cullens would go out hunting their own Kind?</p><p>"And why are these particular Cold Creatures after you?"</p><p>"Earlier this year we encountered them during a family baseball game," Bella began smoothly, it felt good to look someone in they eye that was not a member of her family and tell the absolute truth,</p><p>"What you may know as 'The Arizona Fiasco', was actually the result of a Nomadic Coven who had a 'Hunter' with them. Because the way my Guard is formed he assumed Edward was my Mate and went after me hoping to invoke the wrath of a telepath.</p><p>"He's ash now."</p><p>Inhaling slowly Bella swallowed back her feeling on the matter and tried to relay the information a clinically as she could, it was difficult but she managed,</p><p>"But the other two members of his Coven are out for revenge for, what is likely, their dead Mate. Full Mating Bonds don't break. Not ever and they won't stop until I'm dead or they are."</p><p>Apparently her words truly sank into the room as every one of them appeared stone faced and nearly shaken. Emily's hand had come to cover her mouth as if she was stuck with terror at the truth of what had occurred.</p><p>"So Edward didn't push you down the stairs," Jacob sighed out and it was almost comical if it wasn't for how horrific the truth was.</p><p>"No, a Vampire used me as a soft ball for a little while, y’know for fun," Bella grit her teeth as she said the words. It couldn't be helped, Jacob hadn't even voiced the actual cover story but his own stupid theory.</p><p>"And you share an unbreakable Bond with the Doctor?" Sam pressed suddenly, Bella found his face pinched in consternation as he cradled his own chin with his thumb and forefinger. Deep thought colored his brown eyes as no doubt a million things crossed his mind.</p><p>Bella couldn't even know what he was seeing. It didn’t matter though as she had been asked an important question,</p><p>"Yes."</p><p>"How do these Bonds form?"</p><p>"On sight."</p><p>"When did it happen?" Sam crossed his arms, his body closing itself off while his brown eyes betrayed that his mind had drawn deeper into a place Bella could not even begin imagine, all while Jacob watched them like a tennis match only to cry out in avid protest,</p><p>"You can't be alright with this! He's not even alive! He’s a thing!"</p><p>"I'm not alright with it Jacob! Now Quiet!" Sam snapped nearly viciously at Jacob which caused the boy to flinch back at his leader's tone. The younger's incredulousness was practically oozing from his pores but the scolding seemed to be enough to stave off his outburst for the moment as Sam seethed through gritted teeth,</p><p>"If it can't be broken, and it's something independent of their will, then what can we do ?! Nothing.</p><p>"Not while she still stands before us, Human and living.”</p><p>"It formed when Tyler Crowley's van almost crushed me," Bella pressed forwards ignoring Jacob's clearly growing outrage over every word being said. She knew that her friend was beginning to realize all those questions, those silences and awkward moments.</p><p>All of them were Carlisle.</p><p>The quiet love she’d grown and cultivated away from prying eyes blooming before him as he unknowingly provided the rain and food for it.</p><p>"Carlisle treated me in the ER and it formed the moment we saw each other."</p><p>Emily inhaled sharply and Sam bowed his head a bit as if he could not reconcile what must be done. Behind him the boys at the table grew restless as Paul shot to his feet and growled,</p><p>"You're lying! He's tricked her and trying to keep her tied to him so she doesn't try to escape by calling it unbreakable!"</p><p>"Quiet!" Sam once more had to demand obedience, but Jacob broke in again,</p><p>"He's right! They're trying to play us using her! Can't you see it?! Bella's always been too nice for her own good and now they're taking advantage of it!"</p><p>"I told you to to be quiet!" Sam was growing red in the face of such blatant disrespect, no doubt especially in front of a stranger.</p><p>Bella was truly starting to feel nervous. Even she had more authority over the Cullens. If she told Jasper to shut up, he shut up until the situation was over.</p><p>If Sam had this little control of a conversation....</p><p>She took a breath an steeled herself again. Reminding herself that just because their dynamics were looser, it did not follow that they were completely out of control. Perhaps this was simply how they held court.</p><p>It was strange to think they would behave freely in front of her though as Bella had a suspicion that if it actually came to negotiations, only she and Carlisle would be permitted to speak.</p><p>"The Cullens want to meet you for Parlay tomorrow night at 12 at the River Gorge. We hope, to make arrangements and share information that will make the hunt easier for both groups."</p><p>"We?" Sam's eyes narrowed and Bella inhaled deeply letting the aroma of Carlisle which still lingered on her coat fill her senses, refueling that nebula like ease,</p><p>"I'm Carlisle's Mate. That makes me in charge too."</p><p>She couldn't help casting a small glance towards Emily who hadn't spoken a word through the whole conversation. Her beautiful round face a bit nervous at the statement. What was her place her in this house of Wolves?</p><p>"We'll meet," the leader of the Pack agreed as the others hissed in complaint, but a glance quieted all of them but Jacob who let out another growl,</p><p>"Sam!"</p><p>"Enough!" Sam barked out and Jacob finally backed down completely before the young man turned his attention back to Bella, "Leave now, I don't want you on our land knowing what danger to you might reign down on us."</p><p>"I want to visit Leah," Bella refused to agree with that particular request. Because there was no way it could be an order. Bella was a Human and Sam wasn't her father,</p><p>"I won't leave until I have."</p><p>"Jacob can take you and after that you, leave," he sighed as if he knew he could not argue with her.</p><p>Good.</p><p>"Carlisle made me promise not to be alone with him on the Reservation," it was a bit cruel but she had promised her Mate and she would not break it,</p><p>"Not after what he did when I went Cliff Diving."</p><p>Jacob grit his teeth but Sam sighed but it was clearly dissatisfied. Be it with the situation or Carlisle's request and Bella's obedience, she didn't know,</p><p>"Fine. I'll go too."</p><p> </p><hr/><p> </p><p>It was strange, having the two boys sitting in her truck as Bella drove to the Clearwaters. Sam, who was on the end, had rolled down the window and Bella wondered a bit at it.</p><p>Jacob though wasn’t so polite as he gagged the moment they’d hit the road saying, “God, I thought you smelled bad inside! You smell like road kill doused in those old lady perfumes.”</p><p>That was was the first thing any of them had said since Sam had decided to join them in visiting his Ex-Girlfriend. Bella had a suspicion that he’d just wanted to make sure she left right after the definitely strained conversation they’d had.</p><p>Apparently the very tense and heavy atmosphere didn’t matter to Jacob though as he wrinkled his nose in disgust, “Roll down your window Bella, I’m gonna be sick.”</p><p>“We’re almost there,” Sam’s tone was lightly scolding but Bella grit her teeth as she reminded her friend.</p><p>“I can have a hand on the wheel or I can roll the window down.”</p><p>“I’ll hold it steady just- It’s killing me,” Jacob wheezed and Bella’s compassion for the boy she grew up with beat out her anger at his recent stupidity, as she released the wheel and began to roll down the Godforsaken window.</p><p>As promised Jacob held the steering wheel and they did not crash as Bella once more took hold of it and sighed out,</p><p>“Better?”</p><p>“A little,” Jacob replied clearly pouting like a child as he shifted to cross his arms. Bella shook her head at his behavior as it was more suitable to a toddler. Her hackles rose all over again as he muttered,</p><p>“It’d be better if you took off the damn coat.”</p><p>“Coat stays,” Bella informed him briskly, her voice harder than she’d thought it would be as she tried to stamp down her ire at his immaturity. Her friend clearly had something he wanted to say but was refusing to voice it around Sam for fear of the older boy scolding him for talking out of line.</p><p>Part of her was worried about the strange irritation that was beginning to build in her. She had known Jacob meant well and was willing to talk to him so why was she feeling so on edge?</p><p>Unfortunately there were no answers forthcoming and no more words were exchanged until they all arrived at the Clearwater house. Bella’s truck was a well known vehicle so it was no big mystery why Harry had made his way out to the porch before she’d had the chance to fully round the truck.</p><p>“Bella,” Harry’s eyes were so much like Billy’s that Bella felt something wild raging inside of her as this man put his hands on his hips and shook his head,</p><p>“How could you? And to Charlie?”</p><p>“Why is this any different?!” Bella spread her arms wide suddenly as all her frustration with their full blown judging disapproval just exploded out of her,</p><p>“How is it any worse that when you all thought I was dating Edward?!”</p><p>Then.</p><p>Harry revealed exactly why they were all treating her like she had already died, “Bella this is tearing Charlie apart. If it were Edward, Charlie would at least be spared the pain of knowing that you were with a creature who had seen days which my great grandfather had. Charlie would just think it was a boy you went to school with.</p><p>“But this?! I have only been permitted to see Charlie cry two times. Once was when you were born and the other was that Sunday you left him for that creature. It is awful enough that he is a Blood Drinker, but why must you break your father’s heart like this?!”</p><p>That.</p><p>Oh, that she could forgive.</p><p>She may be at the door for Leah, but Harry was not someone she was unwilling to talk to if these were his greatest complaints aside from the fact that Carlisle was a Vampire. Of course they’d be disgusted and angry but they couldn’t take her choices. They couldn’t even act until the crime of her Change was committed.</p><p>This wasn’t about that though.</p><p>“Harry, Charlie might be hurt right now but we have time,” Bella felt like something inside her was about to break as she called to mind Carlisle's assurances,</p><p>“With Edward I’d already be gone. This way I have time with Charlie, years even! He’ll probably even see me graduate from College.</p><p>“He’ll get to walk me down the aisle and so many other things he’d never get if it was Edward. He’ll see me all grown up.”</p><p>Harry’s jaw trembled at that, as if he had only been living in the moment of his friend’s current heartbreak. There were a thousand million things that could be said, but when Harry spoke, voice quivering with shining eyes he asked, “How grown up?”</p><p>“23 ,” Bella choked past her nearly overwhelming zeal and passion for what that would mean. At her side Jacob scoffed bitterly.</p><p>“They shouldn’t be planning to Change you at all!” Jacob spat out in near absolute rage as he turned to Harry,</p><p>“You can’t be alright with this! They’re messing with her head and trying to control her!”</p><p>“They aren’t ours to govern outside of them breaking the Treaty,” Sam reminded him solemnly, bitterly, and Bella bit back a any remarks as Jacob snapped his attention to the leader of his Pack,</p><p>“Which they’re planning on breaking in a few years apparently!”</p><p>“And we’ll deal with it then,” Sam rumbled and Harry stared at Bella from his place on the porch as he sighed, deep and grave,</p><p>"You know I can't accept this Bella, not even if Charlie does. It is unnatural and wrong."</p><p>Before anything else could be said on the matter Leah came storming out of the house looking even more harried and wild than she had that day of their talk on the beach.</p><p>“I thought I heard you out here, you crazy bitch!” Leah screamed and Bella couldn’t tell if it was angry, outraged, or just plain confused as the girl flew past Harry who made a small attempt to stop his daughter but failed.</p><p>“Hey Leah,” Bella was suddenly nervous all over again as the older girl stared at her like she had 4 heads.</p><p>“I can’t believe you! You! You!” Leah threw her hands in the air in such a display that Bella could only shuffle her feet while the other girl groaned and rolled her head back before her eyes fell on Sam and Jacob,</p><p>“You two can leave. Bella’s not going to infect me with her Dr. Love germs or whatever the hell!”</p><p>“Leah get back in the house,” Harry groaned, clearly already distressed from the conversation they’d been having and now with his daughter who, from what Bella could see, was acting erratic as hell.</p><p>“NO!” Leah screeched suddenly like she was begin attacked by some sort of wild animal, “Bella is my friend even if she’s being a stupid idiot!”</p><p>“Thanks,” Bella sighed and really had no idea what to say to that as Leah clearly appeared unwell. Her brown skin was flushed and while her hair was well kept, there was a manic energy in her eyes like she’d been cooped up for years.</p><p>Leah swung back around to Bella then, and her tone was once again jumbled, “I know you’re not stupid enough to screw an old guy cause he called you pretty once, but that doesn’t mean I don’t think you’re an absolute nut case!</p><p>“What the hell?!”</p><p>Jacob tried to step between them then and his own anger clearly came through, “Am I the only one here who sees how messed up this is?!”</p><p>“Oh get off your high horse!” Leah practically spat in his face, her teeth bared like she was feral with it,</p><p>“At least Dr. Feel Good isn’t fucking married! He doesn’t even have a girlfriend! Oh, but it’s alright when Sam does it because Emily and him actually <em>love</em> each other?!</p><p>“Bull shit!”</p><p>Leah turned to face both of the Wolves and was nearly frothing at the mouth as she ranted, “At least Bella’s just screwing some guy and not ruining a long term relationship! She’s not a home-wrecking slut!”</p><p>“What did you just say?!” Sam was livid and the careful lid Bella had seen him monitoring on his anger was clearly about to blow off.</p><p>“Jesus!” Jacob hissed suddenly as he leapt between Leah and Sam.</p><p>It didn't’ seem the older girl was having it as she screamed right back, “You heard me you bastard! Emily is a home-wrecking slut but I’m glad to be rid of both of you! Bella and Angela made me realize how lucky I fucking am!”</p><p>There was a rawness there, one that was clearly unhealed as Bella moved to offer comfort, “Leah...”</p><p>“Leah get inside!” Harry scolded as any father who wanted to prevent a scene involving his daughter would.</p><p>“Stop telling me what to do! Stop telling me to ignore that Sam ruined my life! He ruined it!”</p><p>“You're ruining your own life by being pathetic about it!” Jacob countered viciously.</p><p>Time slowed down like it had suddenly turned to gelatin and the air was made of cotton.</p><p>Bella had never actually seen a fistfight between two Humans. She wouldn't be able to claim it either because the moment Leah's eyes snapped onto Jacob like daggers her skin began to vibrate and quiver as something inside of Bella told her to GET AWAY.</p><p>Then, like something tameless, Leah lunged at Jacob as if she was going for his jugular. Bella shouted but the air was so heavy that it nearly felt like it was someone else,</p><p>"Leah no!"</p><p>In a blink.</p><p>In a moment.</p><p>In the space between heart beats.</p><p>There were suddenly two enormous Wolves wrestling and snarling, snapping , biting, yowling like mad in the Clearwater's front yard.</p><p>One Goliath russet colored beast stomping down a leaner but still powerful silver furred massive creature.</p><p>Arms, hot and searing were wrapped around Bella as she realized Sam was dragging her towards the house where Harry was still standing on the porch with his jaw dropped, wheezing until-</p><p>
  <em> <strong>CRASH.</strong> </em>
</p><p>The older man was collapsing onto the deck.</p><p>"Sam! Harry!" Bella screeched no longer caring for the battling animals who were slamming each other viciously against her truck so hard it might tip over.</p><p>Jacob and Leah.</p><p>Bella's mind reminded her.</p><p>Those Wolves were Jacob and Leah because Sam was holding her away from them.</p><p>Shaking herself from the shock she turned her full focus onto Harry.</p><p>"His heart isn't working!" Sam was suddenly frantic as he released her so that he could kneel by the Council Elder, and Bella was suddenly calm.</p><p>The vast infinite universe inside her had fully enveloped her, weightless on floating. Her madness and frantic panic locked inside one of the stars just beyond her reach where it could be heard but not effect her.</p><p>Immediately she pulled out her phone, "Sam do you know CPR?"</p><p>Sam's eyes snapped up to her, wild and shining as he too ignored that Jacob was dragging Leah off into the woods, "The basics."</p><p>"Then do it!" Bella ordered as she slammed 911 into her phone. Sam started immediately as if he was on auto pilot, in between breathes for Harry, the young man had the gall to say,</p><p>"Don't call the hospital!"</p><p>"What is Urgent Care going to do?!" Bella snapped harshly as the calm thinned at his nearly foolish words, Sam stayed silent then as she pressed the phone to her ear and put in the call.</p><p>It was brutal, as Sam kept Harry's heart barely pumping and they waited endless moments for the EMTs to arrive. Sue had to be gone to work while Seth was likely still in school. Bella told the Emergency Operator it all.</p><p>Only when they asked what Harry was doing, Bella bit the bullet, she put it all on the one thing they had all been discussing that wasn't forbidden, "I was arguing with him about my boyfriend!"</p><p>Sam radiated disbelief as Bella choked out the words and continued to relay the details of the fake conversation regarding their disapproval and how she'd grown up with Harry. He was like and Uncle but wouldn't let her see Leah because of her relationship with an older man.</p><p>Bella took it all as she covered their asses like the pro she was slowly becoming.</p><p>When the EMTs arrived and took over, Bella could hear Sam telling them the same story, only that he'd been passing by on his way walking to a friends house when he heard the yelling and came to help when Harry fell. He felt guilty because he'd dated Leah and it had ended so badly.</p><p>Several times Bella found herself looking Sam in the eye as something strange pass between them as they worked their story.</p><p>Even to the point that as Sam drove The Beast behind the Ambulance they immediately began strategizing.</p><p>Sam clenched the steering wheel but pulled out his own phone and tossed it onto the leather bench between them, "Call Sue, tell her exactly what happened and what we're saying.</p><p>"We keep it simple, sweet, that's it. Is Dr. Cullen working his shift?"</p><p>Bella slammed speed dial on her phone and placed it on speaker as she placed it down, "We'll find out right now."</p><p>She then picked up Sam's phone and began searching for Sue's number which was extremely simple to locate.</p><p>Carlisle picked up first with a deceptive calm, "Isabella, is this urgent?"</p><p>"Honey, that depends, did you decide to go back to work? And if you did, are you working right now?"</p><p>Bella closed her eyes and Sue answered so she pointed to the phone and so when Carlisle replied, "I'm about to clock in."</p><p>Absently she heard Sam running him down as Bella began explaining in soft, soothing tones to Sue what had happened to Harry. Since Sam explained to Carlisle that he'd suffered a shock form Leah's phasing, that was exactly what Bella told Sue.</p><p>Then Sam focused on driving as Bella broke down the cover story for Sue, all while Carlisle listened in on Bella's own phone.</p><p>Finally when all the phones were hung up, Bella heaved out as sigh as she leaned against her dash and tossed Sam’s phone right next to her own on the middle seat. Then, everything was real again and the weight of it all crashed over her as a tidal wave which destroyed rock formations and sand castles made of children's dreams.</p><p>“These things need to stop becoming crises, I’m going to go grey by the time I’m 20.”</p><p>There was a beat of silence and Bella tried not to let it all push her down, make her subdued. Sam very softly broke the silence and asked,</p><p>“When you met the Doctor, was it unbreakable from the start?”</p><p>“No,” Bella confessed it, because there was no reason to lie. No shame in admitting the truth of the matter,</p><p>“But he told me if we continued it would be and I did it anyways. I chose him.”</p><p>Sam pressed his lips together and Bella sort of wondered what he was thinking. He had been cool headed this whole time as if he was more comfortable leading and working towards a definite goal, or perhaps her own calm had effected it.</p><p>“Wolves....”</p><p>He trailed off in a tone close to unsure and Sam finally sniffed as if bracing himself, “We Imprint.</p><p>“It’s unbreakable from the moment it happens, it’s instant when you meet. Our people tell that Imprinting grounds the Wolf Spirit into this world.</p><p>“No matter how angry or wild I get I can never hurt Emily.”</p><p>Bella swallowed hard and wondered who he had hurt as Sam’s eyes shined a bit brightly, “So you’re saying that you Bonded to the Doctor.</p><p>“That it was against your will, but you had a choice to walk away, then didn’t.”</p><p>“Right,” Bella sighed and Sam shook his head lightly as if trying to wrap his head around that particular notion.</p><p>“Can he hurt you?”</p><p>“Yes.”</p><p>Sam exhaled sharply as if it wasn’t what he wanted to hear.</p><p>“He has to be able to bite me Sam. It goes against his Biological Drive not to be able to hurt me,” She reminded him of that fact, how important it was to Vampires to be bitten and Changed, to be given forever.</p><p>She was stuck with how strange it was to be justifying their relationship to someone who had all the facts. That Sam was just patiently listening and attempting to relate it to his own rather impossible sounding situation.</p><p>Because damn.</p><p>Bella didn’t know what she was expecting but it wasn't that. It made sense to her then, why Kate and Irina satisfied themselves with casual relationships to ebb away the loneliness. Anything more serious would be heartbreaking to end when they found their perfect match.</p><p>In the supernatural world of souls sighing and simply whispering ‘<em>oh, there you are’</em>, relationships like Leah and Sam’s were the most horrific of collateral damage. What a heart wrenching truth. Bella couldn’t help but feel even worse for Leah.</p><p>Even deeper was the tragedy that Sam couldn’t even have turned around and Chosen Leah instead.</p><p>Said, <em>“I don’t want perfect, I only want you”</em></p><p>Never even had the option.</p><p>A ringing sound came out of Bella’s phone and she took a deep breath as Sam pulled the truck into the hospital parking lot. She flipped her device opened only to be relieved to find Alice’s name on the ID,</p><p>“Alice, please tell me everything is going to be alright forever.”</p><p>“Well...” Alice trailed, as she sort of jokingly replied,“My Vision of you as Vampire in a few years is still pretty solid, so that’s good.</p><p>“But the immediate future? That’s what I’m calling about. I can’t see you and I should have the moment you left the Reservation.”</p><p>“Can you not see the Wolves?” Bella frowned she tried not to think about the fact that Alice could see her as a Vampire, and realized that such a blind spot was a bit concerning but made sense if the Vision was in the Wolf’s territory. After all, hadn’t Alice said she couldn’t see the end of it.</p><p>Sam parked in a decent middle space in the lot before handing Bella her keys and climbing out of the truck.</p><p>“No, I cannot so where are you?” Alice was clearly not having anything resembling fun with Bella practically in the dark .</p><p>“I’m with Sam at the hospital for Harry Clearwater, I’m sure your father will tell you all about it when he gets home,” Bella watched as Sam walked around to the back of the truck and waited at the tailgate as if he expected them to go inside together.</p><p>What a gentleman.</p><p>“Right,” Alice was clearly pouting but trudged forwards like the trooper that she was, “Are you going to call Charlie?”</p><p>“Crap!” Bella hissed as Sam continued to wait for her by the back of The Beast so Bella popped her door opened, grabbed her keys, then climbed out before slamming her door closed and joining Sam,</p><p>“I’ll call him when I get off the phone with you,” Bella was pretty sure Sue would want to stay the night and Charlie would probably offer to take Seth for the night. He was just a little kid after all and needed someone to watch him.</p><p>The odd pair of Bella and Sam began trekking their way to the hospital and she realized that this was going to be a bit of a tight situation.</p><p>Having her, Sue, Sam, all in a little huddle. Best case scenario they got Carlisle.</p><p>Worst case?</p><p>She didn't’ want to think about it.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0024"><h2>24. Chapter 24</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Life is like a Rube Goldberg Machine sometimes...</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The worst did not happen and that made things a bit more awkward than they would have if, say... Dr. Gerandy had ended up taking Harry's case.</p><p>Bella had to sit there next to Sam, across from Sue Clearwater and Seth, who had been pulled out of class, while a Nurse Phillips very gently said,</p><p>"Dr. Cullen will be with you shortly, he's working very hard to make sure your husband makes it through this.</p><p>"His situation does not seem to require immediate surgery, but there is a very real chance he can decline if he isn't stabilized. I'll be here keeping you posted.</p><p>"We're all rooting for him and your family."</p><p>"Thank you very much," Sue, a beautiful woman with ebony black hair and deeper brown skin than even Leah, was clearly distraught and was dabbing her eyes with a tissue while her other hand clenched tightly to her son's.</p><p>She was obviously torn over the facts that a Vampire was the physician, and grateful that a man who had studied medicine longer than their hospital had even existed was working to keep Harry alive.</p><p>Seth, poor vivacious and lively Seth, was muted as if all his colors had been sucked away.</p><p>"If you need anything don't be afraid to ask," Nurse Phillips smiled brightly, her light brown hair was tied up in a tight bun while her blue eyes shone sympathetically as they took in the waiting party.</p><p>Then, those icy irises fell on Bella which caused all sympathy to drop and her smile to become a bit forced, "Miss Swan, is there a reason you're here with the Clearwaters?"</p><p>Bella swallowed hard at the accusation, her phone was pressed to her ear as she attempted to contact her father. His office phone had rung through so she was calling his cell, but it appeared he'd left it somewhere as it continued to trill in her ear mockingly.</p><p>This woman's tone said everything, as if Bella being within 10 feet of the hospital meant that she was looking to get lucky or something equally disgustingly immoral. What did she think?! That she saw Harry Clearwater being loaded into an ambulance and thought<em> 'better hitch a ride with this family to go to the hospital and get a glimpse of that <strong>hunk </strong>I'm dating.'</em></p><p>She couldn't help the near contempt in her tone as Bella blinked slowly before she replied, "I'm sorry, I'm trying to get a hold of my dad so that he knows his friend is in the E.R.</p><p>"Did you say something to me?"</p><p>It was funny then, as Sam too leveled an even stare at the woman in medical scrubs as if he was waiting for her to justify the rather cruel and unfeeling question. Forks was a small town, everyone knew Harry and Charlie were friends, the only reason this woman had to speak up was if she hadn't been there long or was incredibly insensitive.</p><p>She knew who Bella was, that was for sure, so if she was new she was gossip hound to rival Mrs. Stanley herself.</p><p>Did she expect Sue to toss Bella out of the waiting room?</p><p>"My mistake," the nurse pursed her lips and Bella turned away from her as the line came to life and Charlie's voice came through,</p><p>"Hey Bells, there a reason you're not home yet. You didn't say you were going to the Cullens today."</p><p>"Hey dad, are you sitting down?" Bella sighed out and once Charlie was, she told him as gently as she could manage. It wasn't enough though as he immediately informed her he was on his way before hanging up in a flurry.</p><p>Just before he did though he urgently did exactly what Bella thought he would, "Tell Sue that if she wants to stay the night we can take Seth and go to the house to get whatever she needs."</p><p>"I don't mind getting her an overnight bag if she needs it," Bella agreed, then they said a swift goodbye before she was looking up at Sue with as much sympathy as she could manage,</p><p>"Sue, Charlie's on the way. So if you need anything we'll be able to get if for you alright. You stay here until Harry is in the clear."</p><p>Sue looked at her with wide eyes, her face blotched and tear stained from her fear, grief, and utter distress,</p><p>"Thank you Bella."</p><p>"How long do you think it will be?" Sam asked Nurse Phillips who was going over some paperwork with Sue. The Pack leader was a bit on edge, more so than he had been since the harsh words and rather difficult discussions. The political ramifications of what was taking place were too large to simply ignore.</p><p>Bella had made a call over Harry's life and Sam had basically allowed it. He was strong after all, he could have stopped her. Sam had also acted to ensure that Carlisle was the physician to get to Harry before anyone else could.</p><p>The Council would be livid, no doubt.</p><p>If Carlisle saved him it would be the opening of a door that held nothing but mysteries.</p><p>If Harry died on the table? it would be a disaster of such proportions she couldn't even fathom and yet Sam had been the one to ask for Carlisle's help in the truck.</p><p>Because the secret was more important than anything else and it was a terrible thing, but it was necessary.</p><p>Nurse Phillips turned her attention to Sam as if she hadn't realized he was there, sitting close enough to Bella for the girl to feel his radiating body heat which had to be supernatural.</p><p>"The moment Mr. Clearwater is stabilized Dr. Cullen will be in. "</p><p>Sue let out an immense sigh as the worst was not over and the moment it was she would be seeing the Vampire Doctor that everyone was talking about. The Vampire that they had all been avoiding the hospital for in the first place.</p><p>Nurse Phillips left soon after when no more questions were forth coming and their quartet sat in rather subdued silence. The only conversations being whispers between Sue and Seth.</p><p>It wasn't a private area, so there were several glances given her way as Bella sat with Sam and did her best to offer encouraging smiles to Sue as they waited for news on Harry. One or two Nurses gave Bella such horrifyingly blatant sneers that she nearly laughed.</p><p>Though, one Doctor's narrowed eyes was enough to have her clenching her teeth as the woman seemed to think she could melt Bella into goo from force of will alone.</p><p>At some point Sue started noticing the parade of looks Bella was earning. Most were a product of small town nosiness but it was getting ridiculous. Bella would have gone outside in order to wait for Charlie, but she didn't' want to abandon Sue and Seth to the judgment of having Bella with them. So the girl just ignored it as best as she could manage.</p><p>Sam seemed to be just as keen to let it roll of his shoulders like boulder tumbling down a mountain in the midst of an avalanche. Bella had the feeling he would rather be going back to his Pack but was staying to mediate whatever happened when Carlisle arrived.</p><p>Honestly.</p><p>The entire experience was just as bad as school except these were all adults and didn't have the excuse of immaturity and and inability to mind their manners and keep their noses clean. Really the behavior was appalling. For Bella's entire life it had cost her exactly $0.00 to mind her own damn business.</p><p>The only time she'd ever been a persistent busy body had been with the Cullens, and they'd practically tied a carrot to a stick and wiggled it in front of her to chase.</p><p>Perhaps it didn't' help that their whole story was that she and Harry had been arguing about how Bella's relationship was grounds on keeping her away from Leah, but they were working with what they had.</p><p>Her relationship with the man who was working on saving his life...</p><p>Bella's life was an actual soap opera at this point.</p><p>After a small eternity, at last, Charlie rushed through the doors of the E.R. He had clearly been off work for a little while as he was in his casual flannel with a white shirt and jeans. Bella bit her lip as she stood up to greet him with a tight smile as his light jog came to an end and he asked bordering on frantic,</p><p>"What's happening? How's Harry?"</p><p>"We don't know yet," Bella admitted and she saw Charlie and Sue share a rather strained glance. Both tense and uneasy over the lack of knowledge over Harry.</p><p>"Who- Who's his physician?"</p><p>"Cullen," Sue informed him, her tone soft but containing all the nerves that were no doubt itching under her skin like hives which only worsened the less you tried to focus on them.</p><p>Sam let out a rough flow of air that was too jagged to be a real sigh as he added, "Nurse Phillips was by but she barely said anything of use."</p><p>Charlie ran a hand through his hair as he moved his gaze over the Emergency waiting area as well as whatever staff were milling about. Bella watched as he settled into one of the plastic chairs and she herself took back the one she'd vacated to meet him which had her nestled between Charlie and Sam in what she knew had to make a rather odd picture.</p><p>The man was quiet for a time as they all waited, he broke it though as he leaned his elbows on his knees and asked Seth, "How you holding up kid?" You've been awful quiet."</p><p>Seth shrugged a bit as Sue smiled lightly at Charlie, likely grateful. Bella herself had no idea what to say to the boy so she was mildly impressed at her father's ability to seem to know what to do.</p><p>"Sue, if you'd like to stay the night, I won't mind taking Seth so he can sleep somewhere a bit more comfortable than a chair.</p><p>"I can take Bella to get you a bag and you won't have to worry about a thing."</p><p>"Seth," Sue turned to the boy next to her and he finally appeared to become alert as his mother asked,</p><p>"Do you want to spend the night at the Swans or your Cousin's?"</p><p>"I'll spend it with Charlie and Bella," was the murmured response, Bella's heart ached at the sight of the boy being so diminished in the face of his father's current health.</p><p>Sam leaned towards Bella and whispered on a level which was nearly inaudible,"I can trust Charlie with this."</p><p>It sounded like more of a question than anything else but she nodded slowly which had him continuing, "Tell your Doctor what I said. I have to go back to check on Leah and the rest of the boys."</p><p>"Sure thing," Bella assured the young man easily, but her voice was low so as not to allow Charlie to hear more than her quite tones.</p><p>Sam leaned away with a short, stiff, nod before rising to his feet. Bella turned her attention to her feet in an attempt to give Sam privacy as he said his goodbyes and no doubt made his promises to Sue.</p><p>With that the Pack leader gave Bella one more cursory nod before vacating the waiting room.</p><p>"What was that about?" Charlie whispered and Bella took a breath as she wondered what could even be said.</p><p>"Sam and I were the ones with Harry when it happened, well... I was with Harry and Sam was passing by," she sighed lightly and hoped her nervousness could be written off as the distress she was feeling,</p><p>"Harry and I were arguing... He din't think I should be allowed to hang out with Leah anymore..."</p><p>Charlie let out a noise between a groan and a sigh as he rubbed his eyes with the heel of his palms. Clearly he was exhausted and just plain tired of all the drama being bred from Bella's obviously shitty life choices.</p><p>Whatever he was feeling, he wasn't going to share it.</p><p>As to Harry's situation, their group wasn't to be left in the dark much longer as Carlisle arrived into the waiting room feigning exhaustion like pro wearing the whitest lab coat she'd ever seen.</p><p>Bella held back her rather incredulous smile as Carlisle pretended to hold back a yawn before he approached them fully. The Vampire only had eyes for Sue then.</p><p>The softness of Carlisle's voice in that moment recalled when he spoke to soothe his children, his eyes and entire demeanor was heart-wrenchingly  gentle as the Doctor addressed the distressed woman,</p><p>"Mrs. Clearwater. Your husband is going to be fine. Though it was touch and go for a while.</p><p>"We're going to have to keep him for observations for a night or so. Which means depending on how he looks in the morning we'll be able to say how urgently he will require a Bypass.</p><p>"I have  already begun making arrangements for you to have the option to stay with him overnight so feel free to make your own plans with that in mind."</p><p>"I'd like to stay with him," Sue's tone was tragically desperate as Carlisle nodded softly, Bella saw him clench his hand in an aborted move which was nearly unmissable, at least to her, and in her heart she knew that her Mate had wanted to reach out and perhaps pat Sue's shoulder in comfort.</p><p>But for the Quileute woman's sake, he'd held back, "We'll get you set."</p><p>"Chief," Carlisle nodded as he turned to Charlie his smile still soft as he addressed the other man who was clearly here for his friend,</p><p>"I trust you'll be helping Mrs. Clearwater then?"</p><p>"I will," Charlie's tone was gruff and a bit wrong footed but whatever else might have been said  was lost when Sue once more demanded the Doctor's attention,</p><p>"Doctor... for Harry's surgery and his continued care will you be...?"</p><p>Carlisle inhaled slowly and spared glance at Charlie from the corner of his eyes as Bella's heart began pounding in her chest like an 808.</p><p>"If you would prefer I could hand further care off to Dr. Foster, he's good at what he does and has likely done far more heart surgeries than I have," Carlisle's tone was easy and sympathetic for Sue's discomfort and plight.</p><p>Bella wished things weren't so difficult as Sue shook her head lightly, perhaps realizing how it would look on wider scale or not caring,</p><p>"I'll talk to Harry about it when he's awake."</p><p>"If you'd like you can see him now, he's sleeping but I'm sure it will be good for him to have a little company," Carlisle offered reassuringly and that had Sue standing slowly,</p><p>"When we get there I'll be happy to explain the details of his condition to you."</p><p>"Me and Bella will go get your stuff, when I come back I'll pick up Seth," Charlie spoke up and Sue tossed him a grateful smile as she agreed to the plans. The Clearwaters then followed Carlisle out of the Emergency waiting area to go see Harry.</p><p>"C'mon," Charlie stood after nudging his foot to Bella's own lightly. Charlie heaved out a great and heavy breath before the pair began making their way out of the hospital.</p><p>"I still have my truck so when you pick up Seth I'll take it and pick up something to eat," Bella offered as she pulled her keys out of her borrowed coat.</p><p>Charlie looked at her, really looked and apparently his haze of worry was beginning to lift as he sighed,</p><p>"Is the coat really necessary?"</p><p>"It's warm," Bella replied stiffly, tired of arguing, tired of just being tired. Carlisle's scent blanketed around her was the only thing keeping her on her feet. There was no way she was going to take it off at the moment.</p><p>Heaving as sigh, the man just agreed to the plan before shuffling them both into the cruiser.</p><p>As Charlie started the car he absently observed, "I'm impressed he didn't even look at you. A bit weird."</p><p>"He's working," Bella reminded him, a bit more stiffly than she meant to. She wasn't offended by it, Carlisle's work was important and there was no way she was so selfish that she'd be grasping for his attention when Sue's husband had nearly <em>died</em>,</p><p>"It wouldn't exactly have been professional of him to stop and say<em> 'hey nice to see you Isabella!'</em> while he was trying to comfort Sue."</p><p>Charlie snorted at that but said nothing to it as he pulled out of the parking space.</p><p>The trip to the Clearwaters was practically enough to take her out, but Bella reminded herself that Seth needed her to be able to get him food and comfortable for the night. That was her job and she needed to do it because he didn't have Leah to do it for him at the moment.</p><p>Because Leah had become a Shape-Shifter.</p><p>Bella was extremely close to just screaming her lungs out as she sat in the passenger seat of her father's cruiser while he parked just outside of the Clearwater's house.</p><p>This time she didn't even have the worst of it! Leah absolutely had that title taken but Bella still felt like part of it was her own damn fault too. Everything she touched seemed to just turn into a trial for everyone around her.</p><p>It was still early in the day, only about 6 and that meant Carlisle had been working his shift for a few hours. Feeling a bit greedy, Bell hoped that he was only picking up a tiny cover shift so that he could come to her at night because really she needed to maybe just melt into him a little.</p><p>Taking a moment to calm herself, Bella slid out from the police cruiser in tandem with her father as he hopped up the steps to the Clearwaters.</p><p>"Leah's at her cousins right now so she's not home," Bella informed him softly, a modicum of unsurety was clacking against her ribs like a pair of xylophone mallets trying to play a particularly exuberant ditty,</p><p>"We've called though so she knows..."</p><p>Charlie sort of made a noise of acknowledgement as he proceeded to slide the bottom of a decorative bird feeder before pulling out a spare key.</p><p>"We'll go in together, don't need you going through Harry's things on accident," the man planned as he unlocked the door with his borrowed key before opening it,</p><p>"I'll make up a bag for Seth too."</p><p>"Yeah," Bella nodded and fallowed him into the house without protest as her father lead her to the Clearwater's master bedroom. The house's interior was no where near as semi-familiar as the Black's home. It was strange to think she had been in it so much when she was small as the memory of it was nearly faded completely from her mind.</p><p>Charlie took a moment to grab a small duffel bag from a closet in the hall as well as a backpack. Both empty with clear purposes.</p><p>Together with Charlie, Bella made quick work of packing a half decent overnight bag for Sue, the poor woman whose husband had hung between life and death like a pendulum. She couldn't imagined what Sue was going through, it was so difficult to quantify that Bella was glad that so few things could bring harm to her Mate.</p><p>They worked in silence and Bella finished Sue's bag, around the same time Charlie had finished packing a change of clothes for Harry when he was discharged. Bella sat a bit nervously on the couch as Charlie packed up another bag for Seth.</p><p>Bouncing her leg wasn't a normal habit of her's, but Bella did it in a slow rhythm with such dedication she was beginning to think if she stopped her heart would join it. Which was obviously stupid but she couldn't help it. Everything from the moment Leah had shifted felt off...</p><p>Like that Gelatin and cotton had never fully faded from her brain, which caused a disconnect between her and her body. The feel of it was terrifyingly familiar and Bella did her best not to think of what it meant that she felt almost hollow as she had before her complete undoing in Alaska.</p><p>Charlie came ambling into the living room and their brief time in the Clearwaters' house was finished off by Bella locking the door as her father returned the key to it's place in the bird feeder.</p><p>As they made their way to the cruiser Charlie sighed heavily as if he too was holding an entire planet on his back but said nothing.</p><p>Quiet reigned until he was pulling up next to The Beast in the Hospital parking lot. With due heaviness Charlie looked at her, eyes shining like an overly polished doll's,</p><p>"Be safe alright? I'll be home late probably, I don't want to leave Sue worrying and I'm sure Dr. Cullen will need someone with a cool head to talk about what's going to happen with Harry's treatment.</p><p>"Don't wait up for me."</p><p>"Should I take the day tomorrow?" Bella asked, a bit reluctantly. After all, she had just gotten back from an entire week off school but it was still early in the year,</p><p>"I don't want to make you stay home from work and Seth shouldn't be alone. He could probably use a visit to his dad too, if Harry isn't discharged."</p><p>Charlie looked at her up and down slowly, clearly he was weighing whether or not he should just take the day off instead.</p><p>Slowly, if reluctantly, he nodded, "Alright, but only to watch Seth. No Cullens, not even the kids.</p><p>"The only person who should be coming over is Leah."</p><p>"Of course," Bella agreed easily, this wasn't about sneaking around or trying to get an extra day free, it was about letting Charlie take a day to wrap things up at the station so he could take his leave to help the Clearwaters.</p><p>This was about helping Seth and Leah.</p><p>So with that, Bella climbed out of the cruiser and offered a brief goodbye as she watched Charlie pull away. Bella proceeded then to amble towards The Beast before nearly falling in clumsily. The girl pressed her forehead to the steering wheel lightly as she let out a groan that had been building all day.</p><p>After a moment though, she got to work.</p><p>Things still needed to be done and she wasn't going to rest until everything she'd promised was completed.</p><p> </p><hr/><p> </p><p>Not wanting to get pizza, Bella decided on their local little Chinese place. She didn't eat there often as Charlie wasn't a guy who liked vegetables but there was no way he'd argue with whatever she got.</p><p>Especially since she was thinking of Seth and was going to always choose vegetables for someone younger than her. Bella herself wasn't very picky when it came to such things. Perhaps that made her an old lady, but Bella Swan was past consideration for her public image.</p><p>So, she pulled her even more beat up than usual truck up to the restaurant and climbed out with the energy of someone who had just suffered through 3 ordeals and knew for a goddamned fact they still weren't done.</p><p>Bella ambled slowly and wondered if she could ask for assistance in loading her bags if it was too much because of her bum hand but didn't think much more as she pushed opened the glass door causing the bell to ring.</p><p>The place was pretty still, but it was a weekday and most people in Forks likely only ordered Chinese to go or delivery.</p><p>Fortunately she wasn't nosy so she didn't really recognize anyone working the counter as she placed her rather large order of rice, chow mein, lo mein, and roughly 3 meat dishes with plenty of veggies. It was plenty, she didn't quite have and idea how much Seth needed to eat, but judging by his age and the fact that he was growing lanky, Bella reasoned it would be a substantial amount.</p><p>Bella had stopped caring too much about her funds because it was very clear that rebuilding bikes wasn't going to happen anytime soon, if ever.</p><p>That's how she found herself sitting in a tiny booth in a rather small Chinese food restaurant just fiddling with Polaris on the edge of losing her actual mind for how stressed she was beginning to feel from the hectic hurricane of the day.</p><p>The last thing she wanted was for Mike Newton and Tyler Crowley to come fumbling in as if they were trying to wrestle.</p><p>Neither boy seemed to have a care as Bella made a tiny attempt to sink into her corner booth and regret that she didn't just call in her damn order and wait for it at home.</p><p>This was her own damn fault.</p><p>She tried to ignore them as they ordered but when they made to settle themselves for their own wait in another booth, Mikes bright blue eyes found her. Bella could see it from the corner of her eye as he sort of shoved Tyler to attention.</p><p>As if they hadn't seen her at school the past few days.</p><p>No.</p><p>Because the Cullens weren't with her here so that meant they'd found their bravery.</p><p>Small towns were enough to get a mime screaming, Bella realized all together and yet she'd known it all along. With everyone knowing each other and gossiping about who was cheating on who and dating, and kissing and was seen flirting with in aisle 8 where they kept the tuna.</p><p>She wondered how anyone who sat in the middle of it and payed every whisper mind could stand it?</p><p>Hearing about how Mrs. Stanley burnt the edge of her pie and served it anyways so she must be on the verge of leaving her husband from discontent or how Lauren Mallory was so beautiful and confident living the perfect life, she's a shoe in for a good Fashion School, but haven't you heard she's flipping burgers so she must be doing drugs!!</p><p>Poor Isabella swan from a broken home found comfort with some one else's daddy because Charlie was too weak of a father figure.</p><p>
  <em>Shame on them all.</em>
</p><p>Nearly at a shuffle Mike approached her and instead of saying 'Hi' or easing into any sort of conversation the boy just awkwardly asked,</p><p>"Hey... Are you alright?"</p><p>Taking a breath, because no, she wasn't alright.</p><p>Her friend just became a Giant Wolf, Harry nearly died, and there were Vampires still out to kill her and Charlie too.</p><p>None of that was any of his business and how dare he?! How dare he act like he cared?!</p><p>Bella drummed the fingers of her good hand on the table as she tried to calm herself, it wouldn't be good to be anything less than perfectly fine here. Later she could scream into her pillow and rant on and on to Carlisle about how everything seemed to just become hurricane of disaster the more they tried to fix things.</p><p>Here and now though? Bella grit her teeth a bit and nearly hissed, "Hi to you too Mike,"</p><p>Because there was no way this was about poor Harry laid up in the hospital who just leapt out of the cold clutches of death . It was true word traveled fast in a small town but not that fast so this was about the other thing.</p><p>The thing she'd been defending for what felt like every waking moment since she got back from Alaska.</p><p>"Dude," Tyler sort of half groaned and half sputtered as he joined his friend before grabbing his sleeve a bit, "Leave it man..."</p><p>"No, Bella, c'mon. We worked together and you're a good person and if you and Edward were a bad idea this is like... a thousand times worse," Mike was nearing a frantic tone as if he'd run out of courage half way through. He spoke as if working with her made him an authority.</p><p>When he hadn't even known she was funny. When he stood back and always just watched Jessica, his girlfriend, act like an actual nightmare. And who knew? Maybe Jessica had just as sad a tale as Lauren but at least Lauren treated Bella like a human being and left her the hell alone.</p><p>Sure the blonde had oddly decided that The Beast was some sort of confession booth but she was sweet in a weird tragic way.</p><p>Jessica was a screeching, jealous, grasping girl who had harassed Bella and her friends. Dropped Angela because of Bella. All while Mike just condoned it all with silence.</p><p>Which was just as bad as joining in.</p><p>So when he had the nerve to stutter out, "If you're in trouble you can just ask for help... I know that-"</p><p>"Stop," Bella cut off whatever ramble he was about to go off on, instantly Tyler stiffened at her ice cold tone. Clearly much smarter that his friend who sort of just swayed awkwardly with his hands in his jacket pockets.</p><p>"I'm fine. My dad is the Chief of Police and if I was in trouble do you really think Carlisle would be working his shift at the hospital right now?"</p><p>"Is he?" fell out of the boy's mouth in confusion and Bella wanted to scream as she closed her eyes and wished for strength and calm that wasn't the emptiness that was filling her bones, she was glad to find it being replaced by that now familiar cosmos of light.</p><p>"Yes he is."</p><p>"You call him... By his first name....?"</p><p>"He's my boyfriend what else am I supposed to call him?" Bella couldn't help the exhausted tone of it as Tyler yanked on Mike's jacket harder.</p><p>"C'mon man, she's clearly good leave it."</p><p>Tyler turned to her with such deeply apologetic eyes while he appeared a bit frustrated and lost by everything, "I'm sorry about this Bella."</p><p>"Sorry about what?!" Mike sort of rounded on his friend but there was little heat or confidence, "Dude! He's like 40."</p><p>"And it's none of our damn business if Chief Swan's alright with it now so shut it Mike!" Tyler's tone was stronger than Bella expected and she wondered a bit at it. Tyler had seemed invested in Lauren though they weren't dating...</p><p>It wasn't her business though, Bella wasn't going to burden herself with those issues, which meant it was fortunate that her name was called to grab her food as Tyler sorta began tearing into Mike in a low tone that she couldn't really understand.</p><p>Bella stood and ignored them as she shuffled up to the counter before frowning a bit at the bags. There were a few too many and she didn't actually want to make two trips.</p><p>As she was about to ask the cashier for a bit of assistance Tyler appeared at her side, "Hey, sorry again about him... You need help? I know your hand is busted..."</p><p>Tyler...</p><p>Had been nothing but kind so Bella nodded a bit, "Yeah thanks."</p><p>To her surprised he scooped up all the bags with ease and gave a bit of a nervous smile, "Lead the way! Hey, does this make me one of the 3 kings? Hahaha! Get it cause you have the north star necklace thing...</p><p>"Sorry it's..."</p><p>He was so awkward and sweet about it Bella gave him a bit of a forced smile, "Nah, it's fine."</p><p>With that she led the way to her truck and Tyler continued to be a bit odd as he observed, "This is a lot of food... I mean I could probably eat it all if I tried but you're tiny."</p><p>Bella actually snorted at that while unlocking her truck and allowing him to piled the bags into the passenger side.</p><p>"Thanks, Tyler," Bella slammed the door once he was clear and the dark skinned boy sort of looked around nervously before he coughed.</p><p>"I know... Lauren is a lot... But after the other day she's been a bit better. I don't know what you said to her but it's good to see her feeling like herself again.</p><p>"I'm not gonna ask for details or whatever but I've known her since kindergarten and our mom's were best friends so I worry."</p><p>Oh.</p><p>
  <em>Oh.</em>
</p><p>
  <strong> <em>OH...</em> </strong>
</p><p>"You should tell her that," Bella sighed because really what else was she supposed to say?</p><p>"Yeah I should..." Tyler kicked the toe of his sneaker into the cement, "Y'know... If anyone gives you problems or anything I'll have your back.</p><p>"If Chief Swan doesn't mind it then it's none of our business."</p><p>It was so Human and soft and gentle the Bella huffed out a laugh as she gave a little shake of her head at the boy before her.</p><p>"Thanks, it means a lot," Bella shrugged a bit at him not really knowing what to do but Tyler just gave a bit of a facetious knock to her shoulder with his fist before beginning the short trek back inside.Bella crossed around to the driver's side of her truck but before she climbed in Tyler called out to her again.</p><p>"And Swan! Drive safe with that hand of yours!"</p><p>Bella just gave him another nod and smile before sliding back onto her worn leather seating and heading home.</p><p>Life was strange sometimes.</p><p>Wasn't it?</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0025"><h2>25. Chapter 25</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>No thoughts, head empty</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Bella ate her food alone in the quiet of the house and the time alone was enough to decompress most of the edge. She was still a bit frazzled from the hectic day but the anxiety was incredibly lessened by being swaddled in her own home all by her lonesome.</p><p>The hour was late so she put the food into the fridge before writing Charlie a brief note and leaving it on the counter for him to find. They could warm up the take out if they were hungry.</p><p>She had been told not to wait up so it would be better for her to go to bed. Seth would need stability and that meant Bella making breakfast for all of them before Charlie left for the Station.</p><p>Shuffling up the stairs, Bella grabbed a fresh towel from the linen cupboard and completely bypassed her room before covering up her stitches with a plastic glove so that she could take a shower.</p><p>Warm water flowing over her, down her hair, spine and legs. A relaxing sensation that Bella was grateful to as the grime, sweat, and stress all washed down the drain with the sud bubbles which cleansed her.</p><p>Her muscles relaxed, slowly and Bella knew she was spending more time under the spray than normal but she indulged herself until she was ready to turn off the water and wrap her fresh towel around herself.</p><p>As she pat dry her hair, Bella sort of just sedately wandered across her hall into her room.</p><p>Lightly Bella sighed as she sat onto her vanity and judged her hair dry enough to begin blowing it, but before she did, there was a familiar clicking of her window, mischievously she swiveled around on he bench, finger poised on the blow dryers trigger.</p><p>Holding the dryer out like a gun towards her bed where Carlisle was already lounging, Bella felt like a child as she cried,</p><p>"Freeze, in the name of the law!"</p><p>"You must be exhausted," Carlisle smiled brightly at her before Bella began drying her hair with a modicum of confusion at the fact that he was in her bed already. Not that she wasn't happy to have him.</p><p>Bella would never be sad to have Carlisle near.</p><p>"I am, but I thought you were working tonight," she observed a bit lazily while she dried her hair carefully. The man tucked his hands behind his head and informed her a little too brightly,</p><p>"When I said I was clocking in, I was returning from my lunch break."</p><p>"Ah," Bella nodded and they remained in a comfortable quiet, save for the blow dryer, as she finished drying her hair. The task itself did not take too long, Bella's hair was long but it was not particularly thick.</p><p>Taking the moments to watch him, Bella knew she was probably smiling like an idiot but didn't care. Nearly impossible was it to reconcile that this man as her's, with his perfectly formed jaw which was sharp yet soft, with well formed muscles like a male model.</p><p>Carlisle had always seemed more like he belonged on the silver screen than in in a small town Emergency Room. Like those Doctors in Soap Operas, if they were blond with a heart that could make angels weep at what quality of gold it had been crafted from.</p><p>Because he was so much more than lovely eyes, lips, and a body which made Bella's thigh's clench in desire.</p><p>Carlisle was heaven in his pure ability to just be good. Kind. True.</p><p>Once the dryer was unplugged she walked over to him slowly and gave a bit of a light smile with all the love in her heart, "I know it probably sounds messed up but I'm glad that you're here with me right now."</p><p>Carlisle moved so that he could prop himself up on his elbows as he returned her expression with a soft gaze of his own,</p><p>"It seems we are both feeling a little selfish tonight."</p><p>Bella pulled at her towel just a bit, an action which allowed it to fall completely to the floor as she leaned over him. Carlisle stayed perfectly still in that moment when she pressed her lips to his, soft and thirsty against the cool frigid from of his own stony mouth but they moved together nonetheless.</p><p>As perfect contrast.</p><p>Drawing herself away from him Bella reached out and cupped his neck, playing a little with the small hairs at the nape of it,</p><p>"Dr. Cullen, it may surprise you to hear, but I love you very much."</p><p>"I love you too, and I know that will not surprise you," he whispered back and Bella brought their mouths together more earnestly as what she wanted became clear when she climbed onto him fully before gasping into his mouth,</p><p>"You have too many clothes on."</p><p>Bella took pleasure as he sat up more fully before demanding with the fire of a volcano nearing eruption, "Why don't you fix that yourself?"</p><p>And she did.</p><p>That night Bella took her satisfaction from him nearly selfishly. She pressed her good hand against his stone chest, while Carlisle lay flat, arching his back beneath her.</p><p>Fingers spread wide against him, Bella braced herself and used her thighs to moved over him, chasing her pleasure as her lover ran his chilled hands over her body, halfway through sitting himself up in order to make love to the swell of her breasts while whispering tenderly into the night, "You're so beautiful Bella, you're so beautiful."</p><p>Between breaths she took him writhing in delight below her and the girl found herself completely caught by the beauty of her Mate. Golden hair messy like a halo splayed out against the pillow surrounding his nearly angelic face, framing eyes like gemstones full of nearly 400 years of love that he had hidden and protected from the harsh torrents of time in order to keep it safe just for her.</p><p>Only ever her.</p><p>Like a rolling tide in the full moon they pushed and pulled, Carlisle was the the heavenly satellite and Bella was helpless as the waters which were guided by it as she nearly screamed into the low light in the moment which she found her utter gratification with him.</p><p>As Bella curled over him, panting from the exertion of such a new position, Carlisle rolled them over so that he could carry on chasing his own bliss within her until finally they could both languish together.</p><p>The tension and anxiety finally completely washed from Bella's very bones as she simply breathed with him next to her.</p><p>Her lips grazed his chest while Bella whispered against him softly a confession, "I feel like everything keeps getting worse and worse."</p><p>Carlisle ran his fingers down her spine with the skillful reverence of a pianist playing an aria, "Not everything can be controlled and predicted.</p><p>"Sometimes... Life is messy and we simply have to trudge through the mud and rain until we see the sun again."</p><p>It was good enough for her as she suddenly sighed, "I guess that means Sam accepting the request to meet is a good thing? And maybe Leah won't hate me forever now that she knows the whole truth?"</p><p>"Yes," Carlisle nuzzled her hair lightly, "It is good that the Wolves are to meet us and hopefully negotiate... As for Leah.. I do not know her well enough to say.</p><p>"Though from what you've told me she is passionate and isn't likely to abandon her friends."</p><p>"She called me nuts, but she seemed pretty accepting," Bella admitted to him and herself,<br/>"There was a lot going on though so who knows..."</p><p>"Let's not borrow trouble," Carlisle reminded her and she agreed heartily. He never tried to offer instant solutions, only comfort. Bella knew if she asked what to do he'd give his own opinion then, but it was nice simply to unload it all.</p><p>Because that's what he was there for.</p><p>She didn't have to be strong for him.</p><p>Before sleep took her, Bella rid herself of their slight mess and pulled on a light night dress. Carlisle too clothed himself, but more fully in case he was required to beat a hasty retreat in the dead of night.</p><p>As she dozed against him, her Mate was still and watchful as he always was...</p><p>Sleep was taking her gently like a cloud which fell from the sky and coated the earth with fog. It had nearly completely swallowed her mind when Bella was suddenly jostled.</p><p>Carlisle <em>never</em> jostled her when he departed and the panic of it seized her heart like a wild animal as adrenaline shot up her spine.</p><p>Wide awake Bella shot up in bed, only to find herself crowded against the iron frame headboard with her Mate stone still like a statue with his back to her protectively.</p><p>Carlisle stood with his feet wide apart, shoulder braced forward practically looming, it was almost instantly that Bella realized all his focus was on her window which was still unlocked from his own entrance.</p><p>"What is it?" Bella whispered lowly, barely even hearing her own voice as her skin began to raise in goose flesh at the idea that something had her lover rattled to the point that he was on the brink of growling.</p><p>"A Wolf."</p><p>Bella had this rule about windows which was embarrassingly influenced by trashy literature but it was a thing nonetheless.</p><p>The only people who were permitted through windows in the dead of night for whispers in the dark were lovers who also happened to be your best friend. Even then they likely had asked in flowery terms for permission for admission.</p><p>Rapunzel knew how to do it and Bella was happy to have Carlisle because he's asked and she'd agreed.</p><p>Now the fact that someone was at her window in the dead of night, a supernatural creature no less, would be completely horrifying. But with Carlisle being there, acting like an immovable object, Bella was beginning to feel less terrified and a bit more pissed off.</p><p>"Is Charlie home?" Bella hissed out through her teeth as the sssshhhhk sound of the window sliding opened reached her ears, it clicked in to place indicating the intruder had pushed the pane to it's full capacity.</p><p>"Yes."</p><p>Then, like the biggest idiot she'd ever seen, Jacob Black practically rolled into the room, landing on his feet like a cat before straightening up.</p><p>Jacob's posture had her seeing crimson as he puffed up his chest, clenched his fist, grit his teeth and sneered in a whisper as if he too was aware her father and Seth were in the house,</p><p>"What the hell are you doing here?!"</p><p>"<em>Him</em>?!" Bella's incredulousness crashed through her like a wrecking ball brought down on a Lego set, it took everything in her not to scream it and alert her father that a boy had broken into her room,</p><p>"You mean Carlisle, whom I invited?! I should be asking why <em>you're here</em> skulking around like a criminal!</p><p>"This is my bedroom! I get dressed in here!"</p><p>Apparently it was a mistake to remind him of such a fact, because Carlisle's chest began to rumble low and dangerous which had Bella on her knees scrambling over her duvet in order to place a hand between his shoulders.</p><p>Her act quickly soothed the growl.</p><p>"Exactly!" Jacob practically crowed with clear outrage  into the low light of the small room which had to smell of both her and Carlisle in tandem, there was no way it didn't with how often he was in residence,</p><p>"Does Charlie know about this?!"</p><p>"That I'm Vampire Married?!" Bella felt like clawing her own hair out at his obvious lack of reasoning skills when it came to this. Apparently the only ones left in the world with sense were Carlisle, Sam, Charlie, and her,</p><p>Bella was about ready to just pack up and head out into the unknown. Carlisle wouldn't mind that, he'd probably enjoy the spontaneity... The kids would get it, it wasn't like they'd never see Bella again.</p><p>Really losing her mind and running away was sounding more and more appealing by the second.</p><p>"Married?!" Jacob's disgust and horror blended into an expression so horrific that Bella could only recall the time she'd gotten that hook stuck in her foot and tried to pry it out herself and the boy had nearly fainted screaming from all the blood.</p><p>His volume had broken just above a whisper though, so Bella scolded him with as much venom as she could humanly manage while attempting to maintain the clandestine nature of the entire occasion,</p><p>"Shut up! You're going to wake Charlie up and get shot for breaking into his daughter's bedroom!</p><p>"No, on second thought let him come because what Hell Jacob! What kind of creep are you that you thought this was alright?! What if Carlisle hadn't been here?! "</p><p>"I just wanted to apologize for avoiding you for so long!" Jacob's eyes kept switching between her and Carlisle, whom Bella was definitely keeping in front of her for her own sanity and the Vampire's.</p><p>Because honestly, Jacob just kept falling so far down on her list of grace he was basically a sticky note clinging on to the edge of the paper about to fly off because of all the bullshit that had just blown in.</p><p>"Harry almost died!" Belle reminded him, because apparently Jacob lacked object permanence now, "There's no way I'm going to school tomorrow! Why didn't you just come over then?"</p><p>Suddenly Jacob looked lost as if he hadn't even considered that.</p><p>Bella felt like screaming just to see what would happen if Charlie came in to see the actual stage play unfolding in her bedroom in the absolute dead of night.</p><p>"Is he just going to loom there ominously?!" was apparently the thing Jacob's brain decided to latch on which was fair, because Bella knew for a fact she was right and addressing that meant he'd have to acknowledge he was being a creep.</p><p>She was starting to see why Leah was always yelling at him.</p><p>"Yes, because it's my room and I get to decide who's allowed inside of it," she reminded him through gritted teeth, feeling all the world like he'd forgotten that fact.</p><p>Really! How hard was it to respect basic boundaries?!</p><p>"Since I do have that power I'm going to ask you to leave!" Bella gripped Carlisle's shirt tightly where her hand was resting on his back, she had no way of knowing if Jacob would respect that. Only hours earlier he'd been trying to talk over Sam, and Sam was able to turn into a Giant Wolf on command,</p><p>"Come back tomorrow through the front door like a normal person!"</p><p>"I'm not going to leave you with Dr. Death over here!" Jacob's eyes were nearing frantic as if Bella hadn't just been fine and dandy with the Vampire just moments before his intrusion.</p><p>"Get out of her room," Carlisle finally spoke and it was so rough, that it almost sounded like the man had been chewing glass the entire time they'd been talking. Yet, there was a quality to it which was familiar.</p><p>Venom.</p><p>Bella realized, his Venom had pooled into his mouth and was beginning to nearly froth between his teeth.</p><p>It was a high emotional response to intense stimulus.</p><p>Their bond pulsed and a distant but near neutron star collapsed causing shock waves of greens and reds to wash between them. An internal battle cry from her Mate's side of their universe.</p><p>Of course...</p><p>This room, this place.</p><p>It was theirs, sacred. The only place in Forks which Carlisle had been able to make love to her. Not even the home his Coven kept could claim that and here was Jacob breaking into their den.</p><p>A place only they should know.</p><p>Right after Bella had desperately taken him.</p><p>Jacob had yet to move and so Bella nearly barked her distress order, "Go Jacob. Now."</p><p>Finally he seemed to shake himself from whatever refusal had been circling through his mind and Jacob grit his teeth as he began climbing out of the window,</p><p>"I'll be back tomorrow."</p><p>"Through the door," Bella reminded him and she knew it came out harsh but she couldn't bring herself to care with all the rage which was vibrating through her bones at the sheer audacity of his violation.</p><p>Carlisle rushed over to slam the window shut as well as lock it after Jacob departed fully. Bella shuddered out a sigh as her stomach began turning at the realization that if Carlisle had been on a night shift Jacob would have climbed in willy nilly in the same way.</p><p>She'd have the window unlocked for Carlisle's normal visit during his break, and Jacob would have been in her room.</p><p>While she was sleeping.</p><p>It took Carlisle gathering her up against him on the bed to realize she was shaking at the thought of Jacob, a boy who'd grabbed her and hurt her, just waltzing into her room while she was vulnerable.</p><p>Violating the privilege only Carlisle was given.</p><p>Like it was his<em> right.</em></p><p>"I need you," Bella sobbed against his chest as she gripped her lover's shirt tightly. Carlisle pressed his marble lips to her forehead while his cool fingers brushed past the edge of her night dress.</p><p>"Charlie and Seth are barely asleep, it's a wonder they didn't hear the argument," Carlisle's teeth were still clearly gnashing at the events,</p><p>"I wish I could, claim you, assure you, but we can't. Just focus on me Isabella. Our bond is Full...</p><p>"It will settle down slowly if you focus on me."</p><p>Light caresses of his fingers danced over her face, through her hair while Bella ran her own hand over his neck, up against the flow of his honey colored hair.</p><p>In the dark she breathed until her heart beat for both of them and their starlit expanse was once more filled with the quite song of twinkling stars which no other could hear. Bella fell asleep against him as she grew sleepy, the strange disturbance having passed them by.</p><p>This time though, Carlisle did not wake her as he left and she suspected he'd done something reckless as when morning came, Bella's window was still locked.</p><p> </p><hr/><p> </p><p>With a love note which read, <em>'You are the silence between thoughts, and fill me.</em>' tucked into her denim jeans.</p><p>Bella had gotten up early but still missed Carlisle, there was a text from him which simply had his hours for the day. She was beginning to wonder where he got his paper for the notes but she also supposed that magician never revealed his secrets so he was safe from her prying on that front.</p><p>The house was quiet and Seth was curled up under what had to bet 2 blankets and a virtual pillow party on the couch as Bella tossed a bout 4 breakfast brats into the pan before starting to gather up ingredients for waffles out of the cupboards.</p><p>Cooking with one hand was difficult, mixing was harder, but that was why God and Julia Child had invented kitchen towels so she carefully rolled one up and utilized it in order to keep her bowl in place as the batter was whisked sufficiently.</p><p>Then, she allowed the bowl to set.</p><p>For the same reason, Bella used a food processor to grate the potatoes for the hash. The potatoes having been seasoned and the skillet readied she tossed a a couple of rounds of hash before covering it to steam a bit.</p><p>Once it was all set, Bella left it as she checked on the brats, then proceeded to pull out the waffle maker only to plug it in to heat.</p><p>By the time Charlie was up she had the sausages setting while the girl poured waffle mix with a little scoop she'd figured out was perfect for a single round.</p><p>"This is a lot," Charlie observed as he ambled down the stairs sleepily in his flannel pajamas and a print shirt declaring 'Olympic National Park EST. 1938'.</p><p>He was bleary eyed and Bella wondered if he was only up for the coffee which had started itself up about when the waffle maker had declared itself ready for it's first pastry.</p><p>"Seth's a growing guy," Bella smiled, despite Jacob's apparent best efforts, she was still feeling refreshed and clear headed for the day. The weight of Harry's situation still hovered but that was natural, it would hang over them all until he had his surgery,</p><p>"Besides, he needs a bit of comfort food."</p><p>Charlie began to serve himself a cup of coffee in his Mariners Mug, as he stirred it the man let out a slow sigh. Bella glanced his way to find him taking her in with a clear focus but what his goal was she couldn't say.</p><p>The observation was kind though, Charlie wasn't looking at her like a specimen as he had to Bella's mortification just a day or so ago. He also didn't appear as if he was going to say anything at all.</p><p>Bella wondered what she must look like running around buzzing like a bee with only one hand as she cooked a full American breakfast on a Wednesday morning. So early that her Cop dad was going to be able to enjoy it.</p><p>Taking a sip of his hot coffee the man puffed out a bit of air, "I'm surprised Seth hasn't woken up from all the smells."</p><p>"He probably won't be up until you leave," Bella shrugged with one shoulder, the kid was up all night worried sick about his dad afterall, he deserved to sleep until 11 and have an enormous home cooked brunch if he wanted,</p><p>"I'll just toast his waffles when he wants them."</p><p>Charlie nodded and took another sip, his eyes still strange upon her.</p><p>"How many eggs do you want?" Bella hummed as she took another waffle out and moved to check the hash browns.</p><p>Finding them ready to flip she did so casually as Charlie just answered,</p><p>"Two is good. Don't want to get too weighed down with all the stuff I'm going to be having to deal with today."</p><p>"Sure thing Chief," Bella teased and Charlie tilted his head at her only for her to realize that she was never really that silly with him.</p><p>Her weird was showing and she didn't mind that he could see it.</p><p>Shaking off the moment Charlie headed up stairs to dress and Bella finished up breakfast's prep before setting it all up on the table for her and her father to enjoy together.</p><p>She was pouring herself a cup of orange juice when he ambled down from the stairs fully dressed in uniform. Charlie hovered for a bit at the counter in order to serve himself more coffee and once he had, the man joined her at the table.</p><p>Seth was still a cocoon of comfort on the couch as they ate in silence.</p><p>Charlie thanked her for the breakfast and reminded her to be safe and good as he kissed the top of Bella's head and headed out the door with a thermos of coffee which finished off the pot.</p><p>Bella took the time to clean up as best she could without actually doing the dishes since that was Charlie's job at the moment for very clear reasons.</p><p>Fortunately though, before she could begin putting all the food into containers for later, Seth sort of just plopped out of his nest on the couch to shuffle into the kitchen, hair wild and free like a gazelle as he in an extremely groggy voice asked,</p><p>"Where's Charlie?"</p><p>"Left for work," Bella informed him brightly, she tried to give him an encouraging smile as she turned the heat on under the skillet again,</p><p>"You want food? I made plenty."</p><p>As any teenage boy would, Seth's face became a bit more alert as he sort of sniffed, licked his lips, then asked, "What is it?"</p><p>It was so innocent that Bella couldn't help the affection which welled up in her for the kid, "Hash browns, bratwurst, waffles and I'll make you whatever kind of eggs you like."</p><p>Seth let out a humming noise as he seemed to consider that a bit, "Do you have cheddar cheese? For the hash browns?"</p><p>"Yeah, we should have some cheese shredded from when I made chili," Bella nodded and then the boy's eyes lit up a bit as he ambled over to the table in order to set camp.</p><p>"Two eggs please, um... over easy."</p><p>Bella greased the pan lightly with their canola before cracking his eggs in one handed, before letting them sizzle as she began to serve him up a plate of food.</p><p>He watched silently from his place in nook, his dark cloud still in full force but Bella didn't blame the poor guy. Flipping his eggs Bella served up a separate plate of waffles for him before plating the sizzling over easy side and setting it all in front of him.</p><p>Seth's eyes were wide at the sight of it all as Bella bit her lip a bit nervously. Sue was a great cook and Bella herself was adequate. Charlie wasn't a picky guy and never complained about the bit of nutmeg she always added to the potatoes or about the fact that she always slightly singed the bratwurst edges to be sure they were cooked.</p><p>"Orange juice or apple?" Bella offered because it was what they had. Seth asked for the second as he began salting his eggs before proceeding to cut into them when she served him.</p><p>"Don't you have school?" Seth frowned a bit lightly as she shoveled a rather large pile of hash egg and sausage into his mouth but as the boy was unfazed while he chewed Bella only softly reminded,</p><p>"Careful don't choke."</p><p>Before she went back to the kitchen and actually answered his question with a little grin, "And miss hanging out with you? No way, we're watching movies today. You've got first pick since you're the guest."</p><p>Seth, as any 14 year old would be, could totally see that she was trying to distract him from his dad but Bella wasn't going to pretend that it wasn't happening so she added with some mischief,</p><p>"And then, when it's time we can go see if Harry's trying to wrestle with the Doctors in an attempt to break out."</p><p>That, got a small reluctant chuckle out of the kid which was a win in her eyes as she took a page from Emmett's book and left him the hell alone as he ate, only checking in once in a while like the world's most hands off waitress. After 2 hash browns, his sausage and the extra once Charlie ended up not eating, as well as two an a half waffles, with most of their apple juice, Seth was full.</p><p>Bella hadn't actually looked for their take out leftovers, and she wasn't surprised after that incredible showing to find there were none.</p><p>The kid could eat.</p><p>Once he was done though, he cashed in on her promise of movies as he knelt down by the Swan's rather humble collection for perusal. Seth hemmed and hawed for a little before he turned to her with a slightly reluctant expression,</p><p>"Are you sure you don't want to choose something?"</p><p>"If you don't pick I'm just going to pop in the BBC's Pride and Prejudice Mini series and that's almost 6 hours," Bella was only being half facetious as she could also throw on Anne of Green Gables but the running time for that was practically half.</p><p>"I have no idea what that is but it sounds boring," Seth confessed sounding a bit put off but not unhappy.</p><p>Bella gave him the biggest grin she could manage as she informed him, "It's a romance where they don't even hold hands or kiss until the last 5 minutes."</p><p>Seth gave a fake wretch but instantly snagged The Pirates of the Caribbean out of it's place on the shelf with more gusto than he likely would have otherwise. As he set it up, Bella made a quick trip upstairs to grab her make up homework so that she could work on it through the movie.</p><p>Really it was her best bet at getting as much of it done before her other Class Work buried her completely.</p><p>"Are you doing homework?" Seth's tone was casual but still muted as he settled atop his nest of blankets while Bella set herself up at the coffee table.</p><p>"Yep," she smiled lightly, not really knowing what to say.</p><p>"That looks like a lot," Seth stared at the pile like it was going to turn into a man eating tiger and lunge towards him at a second's notice. It was quite the look on such a young kid.</p><p>Bella started for a moment though, as she wondered...</p><p>... Did...</p><p>Did Seth know?</p><p>Harry had been completely livid and wild over it, Bella was sure that it contributed to the event of the day before. There was little to no chance he hand't talked to Sue about it. Probably raved a bit about poor Charlie and his awful daughter...</p><p>But was Harry the kind of guy to keep that kind of stuff from his kids? If he was, then how did Leah know? Well... She was Bella's friend and that may have been enough for her father to say something to her.</p><p>"Yeah I missed all last week," Bella said it casually, as she recalled that she'd just gone fishing with Seth. The boy had taken pictures with her camera that day it all happened too.</p><p>Yikes.</p><p>She was going by the rules they set though and Bella wasn't holding back, "I went with Carlisle, Dr. Cullen that is, to go get Alice and Jasper from Alaska."</p><p>"Oh," the boy observed the statement but said nothing else as the movie started up, Bella got to work and she wondered what he might think when he realized that it wasn't so simple.</p><p>It wasn't really his business though at the moment and that was all she was going to say on the matter to prevent any sort of scene. The kid was having a hard enough time as it was.</p><p>So that's how their morning passed.</p><p>Seth didn't pry into her life and the only things he said were regarding the movie. Mostly to inform her which parts he loved watching to the point that she let him have the control so that boy could rewind and play whatever scene he wanted at his leisure.</p><p>After a long stretch of silence though, as the fight with Barbossa was in full swing, Seth's still young voice asked with more gravity than she expected,</p><p>"Do you think he'll come home to day?"</p><p>"I don't know," Bella replied softly, not wanting to lie to the boy about his father when Seth likely knew more than she did about his condition. It wasn't like she could ask Carlisle. That was a HIPAA Violation, and they were already dancing in the fires of an ethical one,</p><p>"But, he's a fighter and Harry's made it this far so I won't be surprised if he's home before Friday."</p><p>Seth nodded lightly and that was all they said until it was time to see the man himself.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I'd like to make clear that I LOVE JACOB... Just.. THE BOY'S AN IDIOT SOMETIMES...</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0026"><h2>26. Chapter 26</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Get in losers we're going for a midnight forest walk</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Bella kept her eyes on the clock as she practically stumbled through her Calc homework wishing she was like Jasper who could practically do the math without even looking. Sure, he had probably felt like he was wasting time 'showing his work' but Bella would rather be doing that than gritting her teeth and wishing having 4 math credits wasn't necessary for College.</p><p>Seth was in the middle of Star Wars when Bella glanced at the time and shot a text off to Sue in hopes of an update. The woman very quickly replied that Harry was staying for one more night and that Seth would be welcome to visit as long as he wanted.</p><p>Bella decided then that it was time to shove Seth towards the shower so that Sue didn't think she was torturing her son. The kid showed zero reluctance to just ditch his movie at the promise of getting to see his dad.</p><p>So, after tossing a clean towel at the kid, Bella told him not to run up the stairs as he practically leapt into the shower to get ready for their trip to the hospital.</p><p>As she was gathering her papers so that they wouldn't be a problem later, there was a knock at the door and immediately Bella knew who it was. Sure a quick peek outside had her catching sight of the Rabbit, but there was just level of immediate dread for the confrontation that she had known before the Volkswagen had been spotted.</p><p>So, with a deep breath she straitened herself out and opened the door to let him the hell in.</p><p>After that ludicrous display the night before, she was reluctant to do so but there'd no doubt be a scene so Bella stepped aside as her childhood friend turned absolute chaotic dummy shuffled in appearing a bit more contrite than she'd expected.</p><p>Shutting the door Bella shoved her hands into her hoodie pockets, because Carlisle had stolen back his coat but left a scarf in it's place, one which she'd be wearing to the hospital because, honestly, she'd need it.</p><p>In his cut off jeans paired with a grey tank top, Bella could see Jacob's tattoo emblazoned on his shoulder. It was intricate as it was ornate, the pattern appeared to be two wolves facing each other within a circle. Still he sort of shuffled awkwardly as Bella sighed,</p><p>"Long time no see."</p><p>Jacob snorted clearly not finding that funny at all as he placed his hand on his hips in a stance Bella had seen Charlie make a thousand times when he was ready to scold her. It wasn't a welcome one at the moment as her friend from childhood replied,</p><p>"I was just trying to apologize about everything. Staying away from you, and keeping you in the dark...</p><p>"Sam had a gag order and his commands are absolute law. I literally couldn't talk about it with people who didn't know."</p><p>"Alright. Fine, Sam did some sort of Wolf Magic thing I don't understand in order to keep you quiet," Bella nodded and this was her life now so really her best options were to just accept that explanation and move onto things that actually needed worrying over,</p><p>"I was actually hoping you'd apologize for last night and for the beach because the last time we talked and it sort of went well was when I thought you were sick.</p><p>"Then before that is was just after my birthday and that was in <em>September</em> Jacob."</p><p>Jacob still looked apologetic but didn't' say the words so Bella trudged forwards, "What were you even thinking?! That I'd be ecstatic to see you breaking into my room?"</p><p>"We grew up together! I was thinking that we were best friends and that you'd kept secrets too!" Jacob's tone was lost and practically edging on desperate, what he wanted she couldn't even begin to fathom,</p><p>"I mean really?! Married?"</p><p>"By Vampire custom, most don't live among Humans so they don't normally do the White Wedding thing. Carlisle and I plan to though," Bella informed him calmly because this was something she knew well, though her voice picked up a bit of urgency as she dug into the problem she had with his actions recently.</p><p>As she voiced each one the girl lifted a finger on her good hand for emphasis,</p><p>"And I may have had secrets but I didn't avoid you for weeks on end, show up and leave a bruise that lasted for days only to end up sneaking in your bedroom window in the dead of night after having to spend most of that same day at the Hospital because Harry had a Heart Attack!"</p><p>"Alright yeah," Jacob nodded slowly then as his behavior really seemed to register with it all piled in front of him like a jury reading off a sentencing. There was something appalling about the fact that it took so much for him to see it,</p><p>"That sounds pretty bad when you put it that way."</p><p>Bella stood there waiting because that wasn't an apology and she wasn't just going to let him accept it was wrong and move on with their lives. Unfortunately she'd have to spell it out because Jacob's next words were,</p><p>"But unlike you, I didn't have a choice. You could have walked away. I know, when we're in Wolf Form we all share thoughts and Sam told us everything.</p><p>"Your Bond may be unbreakable now, and I don't know how, but you made it that way on purpose."</p><p>Focusing on the Bond, the Human girl just let the words flow from her, "You're right I did choose it, I never acted like I didn't. You'll never hear me blame anyone for all the things that have happened to me because I chose it. "</p><p>Bella jut out her chin and refused to back down from this, "I could have walked away a thousand times but I chose to make it stronger instead of quitting when it was tough because that's what love is. Staying when things get hard.</p><p>"And Jacob? You still haven't apologized."</p><p>"I'm sorry," Jacob finally sighed sounding more defeated than sorry, "I'm sorry for hurting you, scaring you and breaking into your room and keeping all this a secret.</p><p>"But I'm not sorry for being angry about it Bella! This is messed up and wrong in so many ways! He's not even alive! Do you even know how old is that THING you let watch you sleep is?!"</p><p>Feeling vicious Bella grit her teeth as she hissed out in a low tone, "364 but he was Changed at 23, and his name Is Dr. Carlisle Cullen and you can at least show him a little respect because he's the reason Seth still has a father to go visit!</p><p>"And you don't get to decide or weigh in. I made my choice."</p><p>"Bella you're 18! You should have waited!" Jacob's shoulders dropped as if he was truly grief stricken by her decision.</p><p>As if he'd rather her be dead than in love with a man like Carlisle. Who cared about her, treated her like she meant something, as if her thoughts and opinions mattered enough that he wanted to hear them for the next thousand years and perhaps even longer than that if they were lucky.</p><p>"Why would I wait when I already know it's going to last?" Bella pressed forwards knowing that Seth would likely be done washing up at any moment but trusting her low volume to be enough to conceal the real contents of her declaration as she poured every bit of earnest affection she had for the Carlisle into her words,</p><p>"Human marriage is just a bit of paper that people make a promise over only to break it 5 years later because they don't actually know each other and realized they were never actually in love.</p><p>"But our Bond is different. It's real and more permanent than any Human will ever be able to offer me."</p><p>"So what that's it? You're going to throw your life away?!," Jacob hissed, his pained expression so severe that Bella wished she could kick him in the shin and not break her toe. Who knew how sturdy he was now.</p><p>"I don't see it that way!" Bella sighed as she pressed the heel of her palm into her temple, "What makes them less alive?! Because their hearts don't beat?! Because they don't change?!</p><p>"Who said that's what living was?! I thought living was about seeing things, feeling things! Learning!"</p><p>"He's really got you fooled doesn't he? Like he's got his teeth in you so deep that you just can't see how messed up it is that he's dragged you into all this," the boy crossed his arms not letting it go.</p><p>Bella knew she wasn't special, she never was. Perhaps neither was Emily. All they were was two girls who happened to be tied to two men by Quirks of Biology and perhaps a dash of fate.</p><p>And that knowledge was enough to have her drop all her anger and resistance as Bella, plainly demanded with all she could,</p><p>"What makes it any different from the way Sam's got his claws in Emily? Because All I see are two Supernatural connections but you only accept one because it was Choiceless and you're closer to it because Sam's leading your Pack."</p><p>"That's different," Jacob shook his head in resistance as he made a valiant attempt to plow through her logic by force,</p><p>"Sam saw Emily and instantly she was everything! From that moment he knew that if he ever fell-"</p><p>"Gravity wouldn't catch him but she would," Bella cut him off sharply and Jacob stared at her wide eyed and nearly terrified at the words she'd spoken.</p><p>An impossible feeling to describe but she'd experienced it. There was no way she'd forget that feeling when she'd first seen Carlisle that day looking like a vision in a white lab coat to the point she had been sure she was concussed.</p><p>Jacob let out such a heavy sigh that Bella's heart ached as the boy turned away from her as if in shame or perhaps confusion and disgust with her. Only he knew in that moment as Jacob informed her,</p><p>"You can't compare what that thing did to you to what Sam and Emily have."</p><p>"Maybe you can't," Bella argued feeling a bit hopeless as she did. Jacob had been such a dear friend and she couldn't help but feel like she was cutting off a limb slowly with a hacksaw as he'd continually hurt her.</p><p>His rejection of this- when he knew all the facts, how beautiful her connection to Carlisle was, that it was pure, true, and everything all at once- it burned like pouring salt into the barbaric attempt to remove said limb,</p><p>"But I hardly see a difference."</p><p>"Sam can stop shifting anytime he wants Bella, once he does he'll be able to grow old with Emily," Jacob revealed suddenly, and the knowledge that Sam and Jacob's powers ceased their growing was sharp and felt a bit slanted as the boy informed her,</p><p>"That Doctor will never be able to do the same thing for you, he'll never give you kids, or anything else a normal person could."</p><p>Bella choked out a laugh then, but it was harsh and forced with all the bitterness she was feeling over the fact that this conversation felt like an ending. The close of her friendship with Jacob Black.</p><p>A boy she'd always thought no matter how long they'd been apart they'd just be able to pick up like nothing.</p><p>The sound of water in the pipes slowed above them and Bella knew then that the loud spray of water would no longer conceal their conversation from Seth so she shook her head slowly,</p><p>"You should go. We're never going to agree on this and I need to finish getting ready."</p><p>"You know I'm right," Jacob jabbed as if he'd won, as if he'd managed to make her regret and it was enough to have her hackles raised as Bella inhaled sharply at the burn in her marrow at his gloating.</p><p>"No, I just thought you might not appreciate me saying that we already have kids," Bella hissed under her breath knowing that she was risking Seth hearing Jacob and getting curious but she didn't care,</p><p>"And Jasper, Alice, Edward, Emmett, and Rosalie are already perfect. I don't need more."</p><p>That was enough to have him ashen faced and nauseous. Bella's jaw felt tight, and she wished, oh she wished that things weren't so difficult as Jacob shook his head, horror plain.</p><p>"I'm not going to sit and watch you just... play family with them. I can't," Jacob rushed passed her out the door and closed her eyes and let him go. She'd made her choice and this was Jacob's.</p><p>Even if it felt a little like bleeding out.</p><p> </p><hr/><p> </p><p>There would be time to deal with Jacob's declaration later, so Bella took her papers upstairs and began putter about putting them away so that she wouldn't have to be fumbling around with them all before bed.</p><p>Realizing that Seth's visit to Harry would likely go on for a couple of hours, she decided to grab a book. There was no way Bella was going to sit in there with the family, not with the official story being what it was, so she found herself kneeling in front of her bookcase in search of a book she could pass the time with when-</p><p>Her eyes caught sight of a plastic wrapped book slotted right next to her unbroken Wuthering Heights.</p><p>The sight of it made her want to weep as the spine of the tome declared 'The Tale of Genji' By Lady Murasaki-Translated by Arthur Waley.</p><p>1925.</p><p>It was the first book of the collection which had been translated and Bella was staring at the thing like it was about to turn to ash if she touched it.</p><p>Carlisle was literally her favorite being on earth and this... This just put him over the top on her Universal list.</p><p>Reverently as ever, Bella tucked the tome into her bag before heading down to the living room, grabbing her keys as she sat to wait for Seth to finish getting himself ready. Really, the wait wasn't long at all as the boy was bounding down the staircase radiating a nervous energy that Bella could only attempt to counter by remaining as calm as she could.</p><p>The drive was easy and Seth only asked how long he'd be allowed to stay which Bella informed him that it could be as long as he wanted.</p><p>Dinner would be had at the Dinner, it was Wednesday after all and the Swans were people of habit. Charlie hadn't said that he wasn't going to meet her so Bella's best bet was just to drag Seth down as the usual time.</p><p>She felt like some sort of bodyguard as she ushered Seth through the hospital while a dozen eyes all grazed over them repeatedly. Bella knew they were looking at her but it was all very clearly agitating Seth's nerves about seeing Harry. She just pressed forwards and got the boy she was escorting safely to his mother.</p><p>Sue was clearly grateful for the care as she actually wrapped her arms around Bella, quietly the woman whispered a thank you as she released the girl, then guided her son into the hospital room.</p><p>As for Bella, she set up camp with her rather lovely gifted tome on a chair just outside Harry's room.</p><p>This way, she could just let the world melt away as she attempted to absorb herself into the world's first novel as translated for the first time. Absently Bella thought that she should learn Japanese one day in order to read the original.</p><p>Perhaps she could learn that after Italian.</p><p>A bright shine twinkled within her and Bella glanced around to find Carlisle in conversation with another Doctor. A woman with lovely dark skin, she was African-American with her natural hair pulled back high.</p><p>So as not to be caught Bella immediately glued her eyes to her book as the pair approached in a conversation that she couldn't even begin to understand with the medical terms being tossed about casually.</p><p>Though, it was a bit funny that Bella found her heart warmed at hearing Carlisle so in his element.</p><p>The woman eventually simply walked passed as the man himself stopped in front of Harry's door to grab his chart. Bella pretended that she couldn't feel him next to her until he spoke up, clearly addressing her,</p><p>"How is Seth fairing?"</p><p>"Doing better," Bella replied not looking up from her book in the same way that he had not turned his attention away from the clipboard in his hands,</p><p>"Not perfect but he's talking again."</p><p>"Good."</p><p>Silence for a moment, and then Carlisle tucked the chart under his arm before turning a bit of a warm smile her way, "Enjoy your book Miss Swan."</p><p>With that, he pushed his way into Harry's room and Bella wanted do something childish like stick her tongue out but managed to contain herself to only shaking her head at him.</p><p>Honestly.</p><p>She probably loved him too much to be considered healthy.</p><p>Really that was the most she talked through her entire time at the hospital. Nobody was going to harass her for hanging outside of Harry's room, what would they say? Bella was his son's ride after all.</p><p>Nobody was going to pump her for information about Leah because everyone knew the Swans kept their mouths shut. Charlie had carefully cultivated that reputation and there was a reason people trusted him as the Chief of Police. The worst anyone would do was blatantly toss her rather askance glances as she dared to exist in a place of health and healing.</p><p>So there Bella Swan sat even as Carlisle left the room with only a smidgen of a smile and a wave while Bella simply nodded her acknowledgement of it. He was treating her like he did everyone else who happened to be helping out families, which Bella was grateful for.</p><p>She knew as with everyone, there were several different Carlisle's that existed.</p><p>There was Dr. Cullen who'd she'd just talked to, who first and foremost cared only for his patients. The man who had apparently weirded Charlie out by his absolute professionalism by caring only about Sue.</p><p>Then Dr. Carlisle Cullen who cared for his family and some said was dating the daughter of the Chief of Police. He was probably pulling his hair out from raising that many teens and it was proof he'd gone insane that he was dating one.</p><p>After that, Carlisle Cullen who led his Coven of Vampires kindly in a way that reminded Bella of King Arthur and the Knights of the round table. They all had a say but there was still a clear leader who had the power to rule with finality. A Paragon of virtue and Self-Control who was a guide to follow for any of their Kind who wished to abstain from Human blood.</p><p>And then there was Carlisle, just Carlisle. Who made love to her in the moments they could steal and unburdened himself to her as she shared her woes in exchange. This Carlisle as the one who revealed he was only a man.</p><p>Bella was completely confident that there were other versions of him that she had not met yet, but she couldn't wait. He would be another when he was hunting, and even when he was finally permitted to shed his last piece of self-control with her. When she was strong enough to never bruise or break against him.</p><p>Her mind wandered a bit, unable to focus on her book completely so Bella eventually just stared at the pages only pretending to read so that no one would bother her. She was pretty sure her lack of focus was due to the fact that the meeting would be happening that night.</p><p>The fact of it buzzed in the back of her head as Seth exited his father's room a bit more brightly along with a slight increase of pep in his step while asking what dinner would be as Bella led him out of Forks General and informed him of her plans to meet Charlie.</p><p>And it even sort of floated around as they all ate a bit awkwardly while Charlie informed them all that Harry was being checked out in the morning so he'd be taking Seth home first thing.</p><p>Bella ate her burger and tried to focus on that as Seth appeared to be in lighter spirits and actually regaled Charlie a bit with what movie's he'd been watching and how Harry had been doing during the visit. What Dr. Cullen had said and even more shockingly how Harry had requested that Carlisle actually perform his Bypass.</p><p>She'd almost choked on French fry when that little tidbit came out but, all in all, the whole thing was rather usual as they all ate their food, and loaded back into their vehicles before heading back home on a strange little conga line of Charlie's cruiser and Bella's truck.</p><p>Seth finished off his watch of the Star Wars trilogy when they arrived back home while Bella made another go at her book. Charlie sort of idly watched the movie which their guest had chosen and when it was time to go to bed, Seth practically baseball slid into his nest.</p><p>As if sleeping would help him fast forwards to morning when his dad would be home.</p><p>Bella did not have that luxury though as she bid her goodnight to them before heading upstairs and just laying in her bed over the duvet fully clothed as she stared at the ceiling.</p><p>Slowly the night grew darker, Charlie's shuffling around the house became silent and the stars fully coated the dark sky outside.</p><p>Then, when it seemed that Bella had been waiting for nearly forever, the sound of her window sliding opened had her sitting up straight to find Carlisle straddling the window sill. He was in a pair of jeans and zip up running jacket as he reached out to her before whispering,</p><p>"Alice says we need to do things very precisely if we don't want Charlie discovering you gone."</p><p>Bella ambled over to him quietly careful not to trip or stumble as she swallowed hard at the knowledge that this could end worse than she'd thought. For her Father's sake though, she needed to attend the meeting. To speak for him and have the Wolves know the words came from a place of love an concern. She did not trust them to trust the Cullens in this.</p><p>"Lead the way, Honey," Bella let him very attentively aid her out of the window and into the tree. Once the Vampire was fully clear of her window he wrapped his arms around her in order to carry her like a bride. Bella took a deep breath before Carlisle leapt out of the tree completely and his feet found the floor almost gingerly while she did her best not to squeal in mild terror at the fall.</p><p>She said nothing about it as he carried her stealthily to his car where it was idling just down the block, before he loaded her into the passenger seat.</p><p>Carlisle tossed her a smile and whispered lowly, cautiously, "We're not out of the woods until we get to the gorge, so we're not permitted to speak."</p><p>Bella nodded as he put his car into gear and drove them in a direction she knew led to a hiking ground. Really, Bella could hardly count the murder scenarios on her hand that she'd been in, yet it always ended fine. It was ridiculous really.</p><p>It proved a bit difficult to obey the instructions as she wanted to thank him for the book, the professionalism, and even just being so amazing that she'd never doubted he was going to pick her up for this meeting.</p><p>But she managed it as she fiddled with the edges of her hoodie trying to focus on the dark of the night blanketed around them. It was startling as he pulled into a trail head and parked right next to the HUMMER 2. Bella could see all of the kids gathered around the giant red SUV like a waiting court as Carlisle pulled the keys out of the ignition of his Mercedes.</p><p>He even sped around inhumanly to open her door.</p><p>Bella climbed out and was glad to see that everyone appeared as on edge as she herself was feeling at the moment but was caught short as Carlisle fell on a knee before her in the most surprising display yet.</p><p>Covering her mouth Bella held back a yelp and perhaps even a demand to know what the hell he was doing but Carlisle allowed the kids to circle them like some sort of ritual, so she held her quiet as he pulled out a small jewelry box.</p><p>It was too flat to be a ring and Bella's bones relaxed because she didn't think she could handle that along with everything else. A quick glance around saw all the children beaming, save for Rosalie who had a soft expression just short of a smile</p><p>"Isabella Swan, you have been a member of my Coven since your acceptance of me and by Law of Natural Order you have been my wife a full week," Carlisle was speaking with purpose but the words did not lack in warm affection as several comets sped too and fro between them in a light show,</p><p>"And now you are to stand by me in official negotiation."</p><p>He popped opened the small case and Bella nearly cried as tears stung at the corners of her eyes.</p><p>She had never needed or wanted a White Wedding with vows and paper. There were more permanent things Carlisle could offer.</p><p>Like sex and immortality.</p><p>Of course he wanted the Wedding so she was happy to give it to him.</p><p>But Bella knew in her heart that the moment she saw the ring it would not even come close to the overwhelming joy which surged through her like a herd of mustangs galloping through a spring valley in her veins.</p><p>Shimmering black and white and sitting daintily in his hands was his family crest on the tiniest of chains and her love for him impossible grew as he explained, "I had it fashioned so it may attach to Polaris."</p><p>And Bella shoved the box closed as she kissed him, Carlisle returned the action but pulled away swiftly as he pressed his cheek to her forehead as she sighed against him, "Carlisle this is more perfect than anything. I didn't think you'd give me this until I was like you"</p><p>"I wish we could linger," Carlisle's tone was genuinely distraught," We need to get it on you and to the gorge, but know that I had always intended to give this to you when our Bond was completed."</p><p>"Alright," Bella nodded quickly recalling his warning about Alice's Vision. So the ducked her head, and knew she was turning red as the burn of her cheeks blazed brightly while her Mate attached the crest to her favorite piece of jewelry. It sat perfectly as the star hovered directly over the lion as if it belonged and had always been one piece.</p><p>Emmett clapped once but Jasper pressed finger to his lips to hush the boy.</p><p>They couldn't be caught on a nighttime stroll with Bella by anyone.</p><p>Edward shot her a thumbs up which had Bella ducking her head into Carlisle as Alice just smiled even brighter than before.</p><p>"Let's head out," Carlisle scooped Bella up one more time and she did her best to hold tight as he whispered to her tenderly, "I love you.</p><p>"And I think I like you wearing that a little too much."</p><p>The kids had already headed out as per his order so Bella chuckled a bit before reminding him, "We need to go but, thank you."</p><p>Carlisle laid a peck of lips on her nose before carrying her off in the direction their children had headed. Bella did her best keep her eyes open and see the world blurring by in water color sound, washed blue by the late hour and illuminated only by the moon light.</p><p> </p><p>The distance seemed a bit farther than it had been during their hike and Bella clung tightly to her Mate as the cool air and his own temperature chilled her a bit more than she had expected.</p><p>Before they reached the gorge though, Carlisle's run came a complete halt as the pair of them reached a particularly sturdy foothold.</p><p>"Why are we stopping?" Bella frowned a bit but her lover was quick to assure her by caressing her nose with his own as he kept her in his arms and explained,</p><p>"I have forgotten to lay out the rules of parlay for you."</p><p>"Oh," Bella stared up at him and found that the stars above created an even brighter halo of his golden locks as she sort of just shrugged as best she could from her place in his arms,</p><p>"Explain away, Oh Vampire Husband."</p><p>That earned her a small chuckle as Carlisle smiled brightly before doing just as he'd promised, "Well Human-Vampire Wife. You and I will be the only ones permitted to speak.</p><p>"Edward will provide commentary afterwards while Jasper will add his own Intel on the meeting in the same debrief. There is a chance Edward will need to translate. But that is only if they do not trust us enough to show us their human forms. He will strictly be translating though and will not be adding his own perspective.</p><p>"Feel free to add your own points but we cannot contradict each other, not here. We can argue later but in front of the Wolves we must always agree with whoever speaks first on a matter be it me or you.</p><p>"So if you are speaking decisively..."</p><p>"Make sure I know that I have all the facts I can," Bella agreed. That was interesting to her. She had a thought that perhaps he'd say that she could voice her opinions but he could always overrule them. Or even that she could only sit and agree or add on to his points....</p><p>This was a bit more power than she was expecting and the prospect was jarring if not utterly frightening.</p><p>"You can't actually expect me to... make those kind of decisions," Bella tightened her grip on his jacket, "Carlisle I'm not- I cant'-"</p><p>"Do you love me? Our children?" He cut her off but there was not urgency to the words. Bella knew she did, like she knew her own name and she realized what he was attempting to convey to her.</p><p>"Of course I do."</p><p>"Then I trust you will only ever act in ways that will benefit our family. You are ours now, just as we are yours."</p><p>Biting her lip Bella tried her best to swallow that down but couldn't really reconcile the trust they all seemed to have in her so completely. It was humbling in the way standing at the bottom of the Grand Canyon or watching Niagara falls made a Human being feel so minuscule compared to the rest of the creatures of the earth.</p><p>"Besides," Carlisle's grin transformed into something more playful as she informed her with faux gravity, "According to Jasper having you there is near as good as having him."</p><p>"Ugh," Bella retched lightly at the empath's weird sense of confidence in her, him and his insistence that she was some sort of secret mastermind was going to drive her to drinking before it was legal,</p><p>"Fine. I can do this."</p><p>It helped though.</p><p>They were the last members of the Olympic Coven to arrive on their side of the gorge and Bella found the entire area beautiful as the river rushed down below against the stones, crashing and slowly eating away to make the small canyon that much more of a gaping maw in the earth below.</p><p>Carlisle carried her all the way to the front of their small assembly before setting Bella's feet down on a secure patch of earth and taking hold of her hand, entwining their fingers in a display of solidarity.</p><p>Bella took a breath then as she noted the others standing behind them. On her own side stood Jasper and Alice while Emmett and Rosalie were at Carlisle's back. Edward stood between the two mated pairs centered.</p><p>It was a very relaxed position as all the pairs were holding hands but a tension was rolling through the trees alongside the light breeze.</p><p>A rustling began and Bella held back a gasp as the Quileute Wolves made their appearance.</p><p>Carlisle had been correct to believe that they would not appear in their human forms. Bella took each of them in. Quickly she found Jacob, the russet giant and she also located Leah, as she was the only one with silver fur which glistened in the moonlight.</p><p>There was no way of telling which of them were Quil, Embry, or Paul. Sam would have been lost to her too but Edward filled his role immediately,</p><p>"Sam is the large black Wolf in the center. He asks you address him."</p><p>The Wolf in question was enormous, nearly Jacob's size increased by half and Bella could not help but stand in awe that Sam held such a power in him. It was amazing that all of them could be so majestic in their Supernatural Magics.</p><p>Ancient Magic in their blood that they had nurtured and kept safe for generations, centuries.</p><p>"First, my family thanks you for agreeing to this meeting," Carlisle opened in his easy tone while the gold of his eyes were focused on Sam as was requested,</p><p>"I know you may have protests to my Mating to Isabella but I ask we set that aside until the issue at hand is dealt with."</p><p>"What Issue?" Edward translated and his tone was bordering on challenging, "We have hunted your Kind for generations upon generations to the beginning of all things when men and spirits shared this realm.</p><p>"We understand that you and we are hunting the same prey, but I see no reason to discuss it further unless you have more information than Bella has shared then this meeting is useless."</p><p>Carlisle looked to her and Bella realized he was expecting her to speak, fill in the gaps of whatever information she'd given.</p><p>Wonderful.</p><p>Clearing her throat to ensure she didn't do something so monumentally idiotic as actually choke or squeak Bella did her best to project authority and sureness which she had a feeling fell completely flat,</p><p>"Alice has been having Visions of Laurent and Victoria or someone employed by them attacking me in what seems to be your side of the territory.</p><p>"Charlie is occasionally in these Visions, at least we assume he is because his Cruiser is present. Additionally, we believe one of them has a Gift geared towards danger avoidance.</p><p>"Which is the reason the efforts so far to catch or locate them has failed. Jasper and I theorize they may even have created a Newborn to make sure they can plow through whatever resistance the Cullens or your Pack presents."</p><p>"He asks what a Newborn is," Edward informed them and this time it was softer, as if Sam had actually been moved to thoughtfulness by her words.</p><p>The Wolves around him though were growing restless and beginning to snap and growl with malcontent as if the conversation was not the one they wished to have. Leah suddenly chomped on a nearby leg of a Wolf which was not Jacob and Sam reared up growling before slamming his front paws down in a show of force.</p><p>Jasper sent Bella a wave of calm and she wished she could glance over to him gratefully but held back on it so as not to take her eyes off the restless Pack of Wolves.</p><p>"A Newborn is a Vampire in the first Year of their immortality, specifically the first 6-8 months," Carlisle broke the term down quickly then as he explained,</p><p>"Our Kind are at our most powerful and most dangerous at that age. Human tissue and blood from their own bodies make them incredibly dangerous, but they are also a slave to their instincts.</p><p>"So Newborns are typically Created singularly."</p><p>"So what do you want? You've presented your information, you clearly desire something," Edward crossed his arms displaying a patient sort of expectant inquiry which did not match the fuss still going on on the Wolves' half of the gorge.</p><p>"That, in the event of Hunting these Vampires we relax the borders of our territories," Carlisle cut quick to the still beating heart of the matter as if he too had not a single moment to spare,</p><p>"With Isabella in danger I wish for short term permission to enter your side of our boundary in order to preserve her life or her father's life in the event of Alice's Vision coming to pass.</p><p>"You would also be permitted on our side should you find yourself chasing them only for the border to prevent further pursuit."</p><p>"What is your opinion on the matter Bella?" Edward asked her directly as if he was staring into her very soul, Bella wondered at it as she focused all her attention onto Sam.</p><p>Her opinion on the matter.</p><p>Well, Carlisle encouraged her to talk frankly and Sam truly seemed to try his best to understand their bond. Jacob too seemed terrified that she'd finished his sentence about gravity...</p><p>So Sam had said something similar...</p><p>"If I'm being honest," Bella took a deep breath and knew in her soul that appealing to Sam's heart which loved Emily choicelessly, unbreakingly, was the right thing to do,</p><p>"I believe that if I die on your land after you have rejected this request, it would be the same as if you killed me yourselves and, regardless of your viewpoint, I am already a member of this Coven."</p><p>Uproar was immediate as the Wolves gnashed their teeth, growling, snarling and snapping their jaws in a riotous protest to the words she had spoken.</p><p>Sam once more let out a mighty roar which had them calming to a quieter rumble.</p><p>"You will have also have killed me," Carlisle added stiffly as his grip on her fingers tightened. The statement had Jacob chomping down ravenously in their direction but Leah nipped him causing a bit of a scuffle before a bark from Sam ended it.</p><p>Honestly....</p><p>Bella was really unsurprised by it all. Forget Wolves, Sam was herding cats at this point.</p><p>"We accept on one condition," Edward cut through the din and Bella took another deep breath as the words washed over her,</p><p>"You do not hold Jacob's breach of the Treaty over our heads as he was still a Human and did not believe our Histories to be fact."</p><p>Bella looked to Carlisle and found him staring back at her, his amber eyes bright. They hadn't planned on using the breakage for this, and she wasn't sure how much they could ask considering the circumstances of Jacob and Bella both joining the Supernatural world and there being no actual damage done.</p><p>A moment passed between them and Bella realized his stand, so she smiled lightly, "We accept your terms. The Treaty is unbroken."</p><p>"And now," Edward sighed a bit frustrated, but it was different this time and sounded less like an attempt to convey Sam's feelings,</p><p>"We ask if you truly intend on killing Bella and breaking the Treaty yourselves."</p><p>"I would ask clemency in this one thing," Carlisle's form grew tense then and Bella suddenly realized he was afraid but being strong and brave for their family as well as their future,</p><p>"I have lived a very long life and waited a very long time. Our kind gets a single chance at the kind of love which will last beyond even eternity.</p><p>"And I have done my waiting. So if you do not grant forgiveness, though we have called the Olympic Peninsula our true home, we will give up this territory entirely to honor my promise to your people."</p><p>"We can grant you nothing at this moment," Edward crossed his arms in consternation at what seemed like the futility of it all,</p><p>"Bella is trusted, but we cannot fully and truly trust you."</p><p>Leah snarled then and actually made to snap at Sam which had the much larger Wolf chomping back. That did not deter the sleeker white warrior as she dug her teeth in like a vice and Bella realized that she was arguing for them.</p><p>For her father and for the fact that he was living and breathing still because Bella and Carlisle had worked together for it.</p><p>Saved him.</p><p>Sam shook her off though and Leah went flying through two other Wolves as she rolled through the underbrush and into a tree which caused the oak to shudder. </p><p>"The meeting is over, they're telling us to go," Edward informed them succinctly and yet it felt far from it.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0027"><h2>27. Chapter 27</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Sometimes the bullshit just keeps coming</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Debriefing was short, as Bella laid her head back against leather headrest of the passenger side of Carlisle's Mercedes. Her Mate had one hand on the wheel as he drove her down the dark road which was occasionally illuminated by scattered orange tinged street lights.</p><p>Carlisle's phone rested on the console set to speaker while the rest of their Coven were in the HUMMER using Emmett's phone in the same manner.</p><p>The Wolves had practically worn their hearts on their sleeves that night and Edward could only say that Leah did not like them, but did respect Carlisle. The young Quileute woman also associated Bella with Emily but not in a negative way and that had the Human girl's mind churning like a slushy machine which wasn't ready to serve treats.</p><p>Apparently Sam too had a respect for Carlisle but it was in abstract. More solid was the Pack Leader's trust in Bella.</p><p>And wasn't that something?</p><p>When the debrief was finished, Bella was the one to end the call before she sighed and sort of just put out there, "I really have more questions now, but only Sam or Leah could probably answer them."</p><p>"Well," Carlisle offered a glance but mostly kept his attention on the road, he could not risk them being seen,</p><p>"They respect you it seems so I doubt they will withhold any answers that actually effect you."</p><p>Bella wasn't so sure straight up asking them about what Edward had seen in their heads was a good idea, but perhaps she'd be able to get her answers by just talking to them. Talking seemed to help most of the times...</p><p>Renee never talked about anything that mattered and Charlie never seemed to talk at all unless he had to. Bella wondered if that was why talking had been so hard for her. Even talking to Carlisle about the things that were really important had come slow. He'd practically had to demand it from her.</p><p>She was trying now.</p><p>Bella knew that she could go to him.</p><p>But approaching Leah was going to be an entirely different story. With Carlisle there was no risk, no fear or anxiety. Leah's friendship could be lost though.</p><p>People lost other people every damn day.</p><p>Carlisle placed his vehicle in park as he pulled Bella out of her reverie saying, "I cannot stay the night with you. Alice's forecast for Thursday is unseasonably sunny until the afternoon."</p><p>"Alright but if you expect me to get up my tree with a busted hand you've got another thing coming," Bella teased lightly as he shook his head at her purposeful obtuseness. That earned her a light press of lips against her own.</p><p>Carlisle inhaled deeply, trembling and Bella knew what he wanted...</p><p>But they were in his car in the middle of the street. Charlie and Seth were sleeping in the house and so that wasn't going to happen, it was why she pulled away apologetically,</p><p>"Hey, I'll tell Charlie I'm heading over on Friday. Maybe you can show me your entire Set of the Tale of Genji."</p><p>"Or perhaps I can simply make love to you," Carlisle was apparently not willing to even play a little as Bella huffed out a chuckle, the fire breaking out on her face spread down her neck, across her chest, until she was sure the redness covered her completely.</p><p>"After Lady Murasaki," Bella agreed as she watched him climb out of his side of the car.</p><p>The trip up the tree was a bit terrifying as Bella kept thinking someone was going to see them but Carlisle assured her throughout that they would be perfectly safe. That Alice had only said they would not be caught so long as they didn't talk before the meeting....</p><p>Bella's mind snagged on that a bit and she just let it go because sometimes Alice was a perfect mystery but the ity-bittiest of the Vampires was hardly ever wrong. So, Bella accepted that Carlisle practically tucking and rolling her through the window was her best bet.</p><p>He was delicate and a bit over worried regarding the whole event but Bella just laughed about it and informed him that she felt like the worlds clumsiest burglar which got him to finally smile about the whole thing.</p><p>She wished she had the eyes to see him leave but Carlisle was too fast and a bit too stealthy for the likes of Bella Swan.</p><p>The experience of sleeping alone had been bordering on terrifying until Bella actually dozed off and did not wake until her alarm was blaring, the sun Alice had promised via Carlisle was beating down through her window all while the Human girl groaned from having only slept a meager few hours.</p><p>Bella soldiered through though and was able to clean her stitches as well as get a simple breakfast ready for the guys. Charlie came down in his casual clothes declaring he would have the next two weeks off to help out Sue out with getting Harry all ready for surgery.</p><p>Seth was vibrating at such a high frequency that she was sure the kid was humming from the force of it. It was sweet and Bella privately found herself a bit happy for Harry, that both his kids seemed to love him so dearly.</p><p>All in all the morning was fine.</p><p>They all ate, mostly in silence save for Seth's bouncing and Bella's reminding him to eat slow or he'd choke.</p><p>Everything was perfect until she said her goodbyes, climbed into her truck, and The Beast failed to start.</p><p>Hissing out a frustrated sigh, Bella climbed out of her truck and just knew that it had to be from her sparse use of the poor thing, only to begin driving it every single day like a work horse. It was a fragile thing and bound to perish.</p><p>So, she shuffled into the house as she shoved her keys into her hoodie, only to find Charlie and Seth pulling on their coats.</p><p>"Everything alright Bells?" Charlie frowned, apparently he hadn't heard the horrific death of her beloved faithful friend's last cries. The throes of the poor creature's death had been pure agony and pitiful.</p><p>"My truck won't start and it sounds like it swallowed an entire circus of clowns."</p><p>Seth guffawed so loudly Bella almost felt better about the whole thing.</p><p>Only almost.</p><p>Charlie sighed but it was kind as he ruffled her hair like she was 12 before scooping up his keys and grabbing the door which she still had her hand on. The man smiled a bit then,</p><p>"Alright, I'll drop you off then take Seth home."</p><p>"Thanks," her shoulder's slumped, allowing the stress of it to roll off. No doubt things could be done. It was a dinosaur but there had no doubt been worse patients, "I'll see if I can ask Jacob to look at it...."</p><p>She trailed off and wanted to die because Jacob wasn't just not talking to her anymore, he was refusing to even look at her,</p><p>"Or Rosalie... Probably Rosalie."</p><p>Yeah... Rosalie didn't hate the very idea of her anymore...</p><p>Their trio made it's way out of the house as Charlie replied, his tone disapproving as he frowned, "Why not Jacob? He's the one who got the thing running."</p><p>"Jacob and I haven't talked in weeks, and he showed up yesterday to tell me I was crazy and he wasn't going to watch me throw my life away," Bella informed him succinctly as she hauled herself into the backseat of the cruiser.</p><p>Seth appeared as if he was stuck between absolute horror at the words and glee that he was being allowed to have shot gun without having to snipe it. His expression ended up being one of wide eyed discomfort as the kid silently slid into the passenger seat.</p><p>Charlie exhaled slowly, like he was a deflating tire on an 8 wheeler who had just lost all 7 other wheels in a freak accident, only to end up getting a flat.</p><p>"Jake's a good kid," Charlie muttered clear enough for everyone to hear as he settled into the driver's seat and Bella was nearly sick to her stomach knowing that he was willing to practically agree. Charlie started the cruiser then,</p><p>"You should just give him a bit more time. Talk to him in a few weeks."</p><p>Bella shook her head and knew that from her father's perspective that she was being the unreasonable one.</p><p>Once again.</p><p>Bella was wrong wrong wrong and being childish by throwing a tantrum. Life was starting to get really frustrating when, depending on who she was talking to, she was either right and they needed to grow the hell up or she was ruining her own life while being an absolute selfish bitch about it.</p><p>Seth, clearly not knowing what in the world they were even talking about sort of just tapped his fingers against his knees quietly as the tension grew the longer Bella refused to agree with her father's clear prompting.</p><p>Finally she decided Seth shouldn't have to suffer as she replied, "Well, The Beast still needs looking at and I don't want you driving me when you only got off to help Sue."</p><p>Clearing the air, Charlie hummed a bit in agreement and instead of just letting it be done he said,</p><p>"Bella I just- I'm... I worry alright. You were making so many friends and now this.. this whole thing is chasing them all away."</p><p>Seth glanced between them and was clearly wondering where he'd taken a wrong turn in order to be bearing witness to the Swans, of all people, talking about their feelings.</p><p>"I don't want to talk about it in front of Seth," Bella reminded him of their plus one, "maybe when you pick me up we can get a burger and go park at a trail head,</p><p>"Really talk."</p><p>Charlie sighed but it no longer seemed burdened as he very softly answered, "Yeah alright."</p><p>The remainder of the drive was silent and Bella spent it trying to figure out how she was going to get out of the day alive without the Cullens around to protect her from the more vicious and outspoken of her classmates.</p><p>It was likely going to be the most brutal day.</p><p>She reasoned with herself that if she could get through it, well she could probably get through whatever other drama resulted from her being with Carlisle. There was bound to be plenty.</p><p>Forks was a sleepy little place and could keep a scandal going for ages they were so thirsty for excitement. Charlie would say that it wasn't their fault, there was little else to do, but Bella couldn't really agree.</p><p>Perhaps she was biased though.</p><p>For obvious reasons.</p><p>Eventually Charlie pulled them up to the drop off lane before Seth, very gallantly, hopped off in order to open the door for her since they didn't open from the inside.</p><p>Bella tossed him a thanks as well as a 'See you later' before trudging forwards into the trenches while her only escape drive away to the Reservation until it was time for her day of torture to be completed.</p><p>Shoving herself into the empty breakfast table, she was glad that Angela didn't take too long to show up with a bit of a wary expression. Fixing her glasses, Miss Webber said nothing as she ate her oatmeal while at least 75% of the student body stared at them as if Bella was toting a sign over her head that declared<strong> OPEN SEASON </strong>in bright red paint.</p><p>Bella was so close to just getting on her knees and praying that she be at least allowed to see Carlisle one more time before she died that she actually jumped when Angela asked,</p><p>"Where are the Cullens? I can't believe they'd actually all ditch you to go hiking with everything going on right now.</p><p>"That Dr. Cullen would just... It's messed up Bella."</p><p>Her tone was so close to disgusted Bella wanted to cry.</p><p>Because it <em>did</em> look terrible.</p><p>Awful even, but ultimately the scenario was unavoidable because there was no way in hell Charlie would have allowed her to go 'hiking' with them. He too, would have demanded that Carlisle just let his kids go to school because skipping one day of a little sun wasn't going to kill them.</p><p>"Listen," Bella made her best attempt at sounding frank and 100% alright with the seemingly callous abandonment to the flesh eating goblins who attended school with her,</p><p>"It's alright. We talked about it and I told him it was alright."</p><p>"Bella!" Angela didn't appear convinced at all as she shoved her spork into her bowl of oatmeal before leaning forwards, then practically hissing,</p><p>"They're the only reason Jessica hasn't  tried to kill you!"</p><p>That was interesting.</p><p>Bella wasn't aware that Angela could sound so pissed off.</p><p>Huh.</p><p>"Jessica's all talk," Bella shook her head and knew that the girl in questions mouth could get Bella herself in trouble if it said just the wrong thing,</p><p>"It'll be fine. It's not the end of the world. I'm a big girl and can take care of myself."</p><p>She wondered if her tone betrayed any of the actual terror which was coursing through her veins as Bella realized that she might just punch Jessica in the face.</p><p>Oh, it would be so close and it would all depend on what the girl ended up saying.....</p><p>Focusing on the Bond, Bella borrowed some calm from across the universe. Angela was on edge for the rest of breakfast and Bella hoped that she herself could manage to hop between classes like a skipping stone without anybody harassing her.</p><p>It worked out mostly.</p><p>Tyler was chill in History so all of Jessica's gleeful malice was contained to stares and whispers while the boy sitting in front of Bella radiated the absolutely chilling aura of <em>'TRY SOMETHING I DARE YOU'.</em></p><p>It wasn't anywhere near as effective as Jasper, but the emapth had his gift as well as nearly two centuries of being an absolute force of nature that Bella had the feeling could level a few mountains in a day if he were so inclined.</p><p>Nevertheless, it did the job and Bella wasn't bothered.</p><p>No.</p><p>It wasn't until she was heading to English that a hand grabbed hold of her backpack so roughly that Bella jerked around like a doll for a moment as she lost grip of her folder of make up work she'd been toting around which caused it to fly opened and more than a few pages to scatter before the folder itself skid across the floor pathetically.</p><p>The worst of it though was the fact that her feet, reliable in only one thing, slipped as Bella desperately attempted not to fall backwards.</p><p>Which, of course, happened anyways.</p><p>The sound of her landing flat on her back would have been gruesome enough but as she was wearing her backpack, Bella let out a scream as her books slammed into her spine.</p><p>The noise of the hall lulled but didn't completely quiet as people screamed in the halls all the damn time.</p><p>Hissing out a groan Bella began to self assess, her hand was fine, even if her elbows had slammed against the linoleum and jarred her bones. Fortunately she hadn't slammed the back of her skull as the books likely provided a buffer.</p><p>Heaving a deep breath she grit her teeth and opened her eyes only to find Jessica looking down at her laughing as if it was the funniest joke she'd ever seen.</p><p>"Aww, you do belong on your back after all!" The red head chortled and Bella was so close to kicking her in the stomach in a seething rage when-</p><p>
  <em> <strong>WHAM!!</strong> </em>
</p><p>Bella's jaw dropped as Lauren Mallory was flying in a blind fury as she swung a killer right hook right into Jessica's jaw causing the redhead to land right on her butt with a squeal.</p><p>"You're just jealous Bella's fucking hot enough for the Ice King himself and you can't even boil water!"</p><p>The blond girl was assembled as primly as ever as she leaned down to help pull Bella to her feet which the brunette accepted. Feeling a bit shell shocked from the whole thing, Bella stared at Jessica as she scrambled to her feet looking at them both as if they'd crawled out of some pit of hell.</p><p>"What the hell Lauren! Everyone knows you wanted Dr. Cullen for yourself!"</p><p>Lauren's green eyes blazed, the glass uranium of them scorching, "Obviously I'm not his type you dumb ass!"</p><p>Bella's soul was somewhere across the universe at the moment as she stared at the two girls screaming about her Mate as if there had actually been a competition.</p><p>Surreal.</p><p>It was like she'd entered a different dimension, but her thoughts were snapped back to reality instantly as Mr. Berty came storming out of the English class room with Eric scampering by his side. The man came at them like an ax murderer as he shouted down,</p><p>"What on earth are you three doing?! "</p><p>His appalled tone was not lost on Bella as the next words forthcoming filled her belly with unadulterated dreaded which caused her to sway on her feet.</p><p>"All three of you are going to the Principle Greene! Now! Swan, Stanley ,Mallory, shuffle!"</p><p>Once more, Bella was shaken as Lauren looped their arms together as if she was Alice or something. The whole time Bella's brain was stuck on a loop of:</p><p>
  <em>WHAT THE HELL WHAT THE HELL WHAT THE HELL WHAT THE HELL WHAT THE HELL WHAT THE HELL WHAT THE HELL WHAT THE HELL WHAT THE HELL WHAT THE HELL WHAT THE HELL</em>
</p><p>Mr. Berty herded them himself and Bella was boneless as her back and her shoulder ached from the fall. It was then Bella realized that Lauren was practically keeping her standing.</p><p>Perhaps she did hit her head.</p><p>"Bella needs a Doctor," Lauren was clearly gritting her teeth and Bella felt her brain getting a little foggy.</p><p>Oh, yeah she'd probably hit her head and her brain did that thing where it edited it out because it'd hurt too much..</p><p>Jessica's tone was callous as she snorted, "Another one?!'</p><p>"She hasn't said shit since Jessica pulled her down and I don't think she can walk right," Lauren sounded on the verge of caterwauling as Bella took a deep breath in an attempt to get her brain back in order.</p><p>"Principles! We'll bring the nurse in," Mr. Berty didn't actually sound too worried and Bella's tummy was starting to feel like a rolling pot which had begun to boil.</p><p>"Shit, Bella hey," Lauren's eyes were shining and Bella tried to talk but her mouth was full of cotton which was forcing it's way down her throat.</p><p>Suddenly the universe inside her felt like all the stars had burned out cold in a massive heat death.</p><p>Oh..</p><p>Oh no..</p><p>"The stars are going out," Bella managed to force out and later she'd realize what a complete moron she sounded like but it had been the most pressing issue. Because Carlisle could feel those stars going out...</p><p>He could feel them...</p><p>But it was sunny...</p><p>Shit...</p><p>"It's day time," Lauren replied in a way that sounded as if she'd never tried to comfort anyone in her entire life so Bella had the urge to pat her, which she did.</p><p>"It's alright. You'll get better."</p><p>"is she on drugs?" Jessica frowned and Lauren whipped her head around so fast her blonde ponytail flashed like a lightening strike sent from God himself to light up her rage,</p><p>"She's obviously hit her head you absolute--- UUURHGHGHGH"</p><p>The frustrated groan was cut off as Mr. Berty told them all to be quiet before shoving their rather ragged trio into the office and informing the secretary of what he'd seen and been told about the tussle.</p><p>Lauren aided Bella into a chair and the brunette thanked her, at least she was sure she made an attempt to before pressing her face into her hands when the back of her skull began to feel like a woodpecker was trying to build a nest.</p><p>Right.</p><p>She had hit her head after all.</p><p>
  <em>No sex for Bella today...</em>
</p><p>Lauren wrapped an arm around Bella's shoulder, ostensibly in support before whispering in the most angelic but horrified tone, "Bella, don't talk."</p><p>Oh. Oops....</p><p>Bella looked up at the two other girls as she slid her hands down her face only to find Jessica's lip busted and bleeding so much that there was a paper towel covered in blood pressed to it. The red head's entire cheek was blazing like a burning field just before planting season.</p><p>"You're gonna need stitches," Bella sighed but bile rose up with the air as she did.</p><p>"I'm concussed," she finally managed to choke out as she stared at Lauren's reddened knuckles, it was a study in contrast to find the blonde's nails perfectly manicured with white tips, her skin shining with health while her knuckles were red, one even had torn skin and a bit of blood.</p><p>Jessica was probably in a world of hurt.</p><p>"Principle Greene is ready."</p><p>It was a bit of a shuffle as Bella hurled when Lauren tried to help her up but the brunette ended up getting it on the carpet and Lauren's only casualty were her sneakers. They looked fancy though so perhaps it wasn't too much of an accomplishment.</p><p>Eventually all three girls were sat like eggs in basket in front of the enormous desk of Principle Greene and his beady little eyes framed by his rather thin face which matched the lankiness of the rest of him.</p><p>Mr. Greene was older than 50 but couldn't be more than 63 or so...</p><p>His hair was mostly grey but the roots of his side burns were still richly dark brown like some sort of reverse George Clooney.</p><p>"What do you have to say for yourself Miss Swan?" was the first thing out of his thin mumbly little mouth and Bella's brain was no longer off picking flowers.</p><p>Well most of it was among the tulips, but there was some sense to the blur, but she didn't manage to answer as Lauren screeched, "HER?! Jessica's the one! Bella has a concussion and needs to see a Doctor!"</p><p>"I'm not saying anything until my mom gets here," Jessica stuck her nose up like a poodle and Bella huffed out a gravely breath in a lame attempt not to let her churning stomach finish the job on Lauren's white shoes.</p><p>"She looks fine to me," Mr. Greene muttered, "So she can speak for herself."</p><p>"You can die from concussions," Bella informed him and it took a lot out of her to say as she felt the burn of stomach acid rise once more.</p><p>God she really hoped she wasn't about to host 'Sick Up Two: Electric Boogaloo' right then and there.</p><p>A moment passed and nothing happened so Bella sighed since she was in the clear.</p><p>"Well the nurse is coming," Mr. Berty informed them from his corner of the room he'd apparently set up camp in. He was sitting ramrod straight in sofa chair which looked like it was made from bricks and was positioned right next to a plastic looking ficus.</p><p>"I'll tell you what happened," Lauren scoffed as she looked around the room, "Jessica grabbed Bella's backpack and pulled her to the ground!</p><p>"She pretty much said Bella belongs on her back and so I punched her in her stupid mouth!"</p><p>Something like an electric ion storm began brewing in Bella as the stars hadn't quite rebooted themselves back up to their luster.</p><p>"This is so bad," everything in her was screaming to just leave, get out, go find Carlisle where he was no doubt climbing the walls in the glass cage of his house while the kids did their best to keep him from rushing to her himself.</p><p>Mr. Greene scolded Lauren and told her to stay quiet until the parents arrive and Bella wanted to ask why he'd even asked her then? Because he'd wanted the story so why was Lauren suddenly in trouble for giving it?</p><p>But instead she focused on trying to bring her stars back to life, desperately failing as her back was settling into a stiff soreness, the same as her elbows.</p><p>The woodpecker was still going at it like no tomorrow.</p><p>A small eternity passed as that distant storm brewed all the way into an actual planet consuming monstrosity and Bella just prayed that Carlisle was being pinned down by a pile of children.</p><p>Like a gunshot, the door to the office slammed opened and Mr. Mallory moseyed in like he owned the place. Bella groaned as the noise made the pounding spike for a moment. She turned what must have been a horrible weak glare at the man.</p><p>He returned her expression with the most smarmy smile she'd ever seen in her entire life and it gave her literal chills on top of every other horrid thing occurring to her body at the moment.</p><p>"Lauren, Sweet Pea, what's all this about?" The man asked but he wasn't looking at Lauren, his eyes instead remained on Bella as if he was trying to work something very interesting out.</p><p>Bella decided if she threw up again it would be on his designer three piece suit because nobody had ever taught him not to stare like a creep at girls.</p><p>Lauren made a noise too close to a retch to be a coincidence as she spat, "Jessica assaulted Bella so I broke her face."</p><p>Jessica was still sitting there seething and refusing to talk.</p><p>Mr. Mallory hummed but it wasn't really anything Bella could decipher.</p><p>Shortly then Mrs. Stanley rushed into the room and the moment her gaze shifted from Jessica, who the woman had obviously gone to first, it fell on Bella and Lauren. Immediately she sighed,</p><p>"What did you two do?"</p><p>"Mom!" Jessica broke out sobbing like a C list actress trying to make it into a block buster but was about to be cut from the casting call,</p><p>"Bella's been torturing me all year! She and her stupid friends attacked me at the Megaplex because I didn't want to hang out anymore after how she treated me before prom!</p><p>"Now she's got Lauren making up stories and punching me! Bella tripped like an idiot and they're trying to pin it on me!"</p><p>"Everyone heard you!" Lauren screeched like a vicious thing and Bella took another heaving breath as she focused as best as she could through the storm and fog in order to push herself up out of her chair and stare down Jessica before bellowing,</p><p>"You wouldn't stop calling me a liar, you grabbed me at the Megaplex because you couldn't stand that I didn't care about your stupid immature posturing and you're such a jealous grasping little girl that you attacked me in the hall and said I belonged on my back!</p><p>"Jessica Stanley, you are a conniving wretch of a child and I should press charges for slander and assault!"</p><p>"Bells?" Charlie's tone was so heartbroken as Bella looked up at him from her place where was shaking from the strain of her attempt to stand while supporting herself on the chair. Her father was in the same clothes from just a few hours ago.</p><p>Tired, he looked so exhausted and nearly like the world was ending again as he stood in the doorway of the Principle's office.</p><p>Mrs. Stanley didn't care for the Chief of Police's arrival though as she began protesting Bella's complete condemnation for her daughter's character, Jessica joined her. Uttering pure vitriol not only about Bella's behavior but her own upbringing.</p><p>As Mrs. Stanley spat, "I'm not surprised though! What should we expect from a girl who's father let's his friends be a bit more than neighborly with her!"</p><p>Bella couldn't help it then as she began sobbing in a screaming rage,"Shut up! It's none of your business! This is about the fact that my back hurts, my elbows hurt, and a maniac is taking a mallet to the back of my head!"</p><p>Turning to Mr. Greene, who had been trying to quell the yelling but was failing because of his soft tones, Bella hissed out with accusation,</p><p>"And you said a nurse was coming!"</p><p>This time when Bella heaved, Lauren grabbed the trash can so her mess all fell out into there.</p><p>Charlie moved like hell then as he wrapped his arms around her, "Bella what's wrong sweetie."</p><p>"She has a concussion!" Lauren choked out like she too was crying desperately, "Jessica grabbed her and pulled her to the floor where Bella hit her head!"</p><p>Bella realized that the blonde was crying, her perfect face growing red and blotchy in a way that very tragically made her appear familiar and friendly.</p><p>"Listen here," Charlie hissed through gritted teeth, "My daughter knows damn well what a concussion looks like and I can reign down hell on you if it turns out you've been keeping her here with it untreated!</p><p>"So I'm leaving with her! I don't care what the hell happened! My daughter is hurt and that comes first!"</p><p>With that Charlie tenderly began dragging Bella out of the office as she cried and cried feeling the horrifying ion storm beginning to consume everything to the point that even her father's fingers felt as if they were tingling on her skin.</p><p>"I'm sorry," Bella managed to force out between sobs as her father escorted her through the thankfully empty halls of the campus,</p><p>"I'm sorry daddy."</p><p>"Oh, Bells..." Charlie too sounded near tears, she knew what that sounded like now that she'd seen it and Bella had never wanted to ever hear it again but there they were,</p><p>"What am I gonna do with you? How the hell did this happen?"</p><p>Charlie oh so tenderly loaded her into his passenger seat before getting in himself. The man pressed his head to the steering wheel and Bella almost choked on her own tongue as he turned the engine over before pulling out of his spot. There was nothing but strained silence for a moment as they departed from the school</p><p>Clearly he was in distress and Bella could understand that as the electricity began pulsing, threatening to leave her skin completely, yet Bella couldn't stop her crying.</p><p>"Bells, Bells, Bells.... Tell me you didn't get in a fight about Cullen. Tell me my baby hasn't become the kind of girl who gets in fights over men."</p><p>"Jessica did it," Bella sobbed as the crackled of power around her was nearly tangible, "She grabbed my backpack and pulled it so I'd fall.</p><p>"She said I belonged on my back so Lauren punched her."</p><p>Charlie let out such as strange sound then, but Bella knew somehow that it was relieved and pissed off all at once.Grateful probably because she hadn't started it, angry because she'd been keeping it from him. She'd told Carlisle about Jessica but hadn't told her own father.</p><p>Bella's guilt consumed her at that.</p><p>It was even worse in the face of the accusation Mrs. Stanley had thrown his way while Mr. Mallory had raked his gaze over Bella like she was fresh meat.</p><p>Distantly, Bella realized that Charlie was asking why Lauren punched her, but she mostly missed it because her phone started beeping. For some reason-</p><p>Probably her concussion.</p><p>Bella though it a better idea to pull out her phone from her pocket instead of answering him. And as she flipped it opened, the girl realized that they were about to hit the forest lined road which led out of the residential portion of Forks.</p><p>Because the text from Alice simply read;</p><p>
  <em>Brace Yourself</em>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0028"><h2>28. Chapter 28</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>And the universe said, "I love you."</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The thing about Alice was that she only ever gave the information she could.</p><p>Bella's foggy brain was clear enough for her to understand that this was probably <em>it.</em></p><p>God.</p><p>"Brace yourself," Bella read the words aloud which, reasonably, caused Charlie to reply with a bit of frown,</p><p>"What?"</p><p>She could hear the blatant confusion because she hadn't answered his question about how come Lauren Mallory was the one getting into fisticuffs for her, and so Bella pushed herself to demand more urgently as she herself grabbed hold of the vehicle's interior,</p><p>"BRACE YOURSELF!"</p><p>Then, there was an unholy sound of crunching metal as Charlie swerved. Something had rammed into the cruiser and Bella took a breath as she realized that it was a <em>someone.</em></p><p>"What the hell was that?!" Charlie's upset colored everything as he checked his mirrors for what he likely thought was an animal or some piece of debris.</p><p>The hit was light compared to what Bella knew it could be. As if they were testing something out so seeing the opportunity, she screamed again,</p><p>"DAD BRACE YOURSELF!"</p><p>Charlie desperately  attempted to regain control of the vehicle before-</p><p>
  <em> <strong>CRUNCH!</strong> </em>
</p><p>
  <em> <strong>WHAM!</strong> </em>
</p><p>Weightless wasn't a feeling you got used to.</p><p>Bella's addled brain considered that, perhaps the only people who ever did were astronauts.</p><p>She wasn't an astronaut though.</p><p>No.</p><p>Bella was an 18 year old girl gritting her teeth as she screamed, her only good hand holding onto the passenger side door as Charlie's police cruiser flipped off the road. The collision had occurred on the driver's side of the car with a mighty crash like thunder which echoed through her concussed brain like the beads of a rain stick being tossed around like a baton on field day.</p><p>Everything had happened so fast that Bella couldn't speak, even scream, before Charlie's grip on the steering wheel became white knuckled from the mighty impact.</p><p>They had been the only ones on the road and Bella's crying started up anew as her aching back was jostled while they rolled down the shoulder, subsequently into the trees. Fallen hardwoods along with enormous boulders slamming against the tumbling vehicle elevated the ordeal beyond terrifying as she felt her soul attempting to leave her body in a mighty quake when, after what felt like an epoch the cruiser's momentum finally ceased.</p><p>Immediate Bella hurled.</p><p>It was barely anything but bile and saliva as she heaved, her entire boy thrumming as her dizziness increased tenfold.</p><p>She hadn't realized she was closing her eyes until the girl slowly forced them opened to find the light which peaked through the canopy of the mighty oaks too bright.</p><p>Another hit to the head had Bella seeing white spots like floating dust motes waltzing within a sunbeam.</p><p>"Bella," Charlie groaned and the girl immediately turned her attention to her father who had been driving. The swift action managed to get Bella feeling as if her organs were about to fully come up out of her mouth like some sort of Human starfish.</p><p>His head was bleeding and the airbags had failed to go off which would only register to Bella later as her entire body felt empty of everything, even her.</p><p>Not being able to speak, Bella forced out a weak noise so that Charlie could know she was still breathing, still alive. They were pinned so the passenger side was skyward and the seat belt which had torn through her hoodie was also digging into her flesh. The pressure of it informed Bella that the strap was the only thing keeping her from falling onto Charlie who was breathing heavily.</p><p>"Get them out of there," a steely voice demanded, it was accented slightly and Bella was struggling to place it until, with a mighty noise like scrapping metal, the cruiser was jostled upright.</p><p>It felt like flying around all over again. Yet, once the commotion settled again Bella managed to move enough to force herself to gaze out of the windshield.</p><p>Laurent stood there with a patient as well as long suffering expression as if he had all goddamned day to waste. His ebony skin was sparkling, black sapphire skin refracting the copious sunlight. It would have been beautiful if Bella hadn't known what it meant as his order truly registered and Charlie began gruffly shouting,</p><p>"What the hell who are you?!"</p><p>Risking sickness as well as taking her eyes off Laurent, she shifted to face her father only to find a woman Bella did not recognize at all. Her shining brown skin as well as her red eyes betrayed what she was though the woman began prying the cruiser door opened like ring pull can of fruit which caused Charlie to once more begin crying out,</p><p>"HEY HEY HEY!!"</p><p>His brain likely just as scrambled as Bella's own before she realized the tearing, grinding steel was not just coming from the woman's actions but behind her as a hand ripped the seat belt holding her in place before grabbing the Human girl roughly yanking her through the opening. The passenger side door lay mangled by the totaled cruiser as Bella could feel that ion storm burst out from her throat as she screamed,</p><p>"LET GO LET GO LET GO!!!"</p><p>Against her will she squirmed uselessly as a man, because he was a Vampire man with sandy blond hair, hauled her out into the grass and mud of the forest floor. He was yanking her around with a firm hold on Bella's jacket, like she was yapping dog to be toted around at the scruff of it's neck.</p><p>"Don't break them!" Laurent's tone was harsher, as if they'd drilled this a billion times and these strangers always failed him, "Especially you Kristie, I don't care how wonderful he smells. "</p><p>Bella bore witness helplessly as Charlie was dragged kicking and shouting as best as he could manage after such a jarring accident. The man was having a crisis as Bella could see his mixed up haze begin to lift enough for him to realize that a woman not too much bigger than his own daughter was hauling him around like a rag doll.</p><p>Bella wiggled hopelessly against the ironclad, nearly invincible, grip of her captor, she didn't care as she pushed her wobbling useless legs into the dirt and leaves in order to strain closer towards Charlie.</p><p>Charlie who had no idea what was happening as these people who shone in the sun like their skin being set ablaze were roughhousing them.</p><p>"Stop moving you stupid bitch!" the Vampire holding her demanded and Bella didn't care. Not about the jerk holding her, and not about how it likely didn't matter to him that Laurent wanted her alive. In that desperate moment only Charlie mattered as as she cried out,</p><p>"Dad! No! no!"</p><p>It was like being a child again.</p><p>Those perfect summers where she'd always have to say goodbye to him.</p><p>Her father's house where life was quieter and easier.</p><p>No bills, even fewer chores, her free time not wasted watching the world outside pass by because Jake had been there to fill in the gaps of her boring existence.</p><p>Endless days of going to the beach and building sandcastles. Rolling around in the sand, or even just digging holes as deep as they could in order to see whose was vast enough to have a dent after high tide the following morning. Days where Bella truly felt like a child, as Charlie fished and she swindled Jacob into doing stupid things...</p><p>Things she knew he only went along with because it made her laugh. Most of her life was lived with Renee, yet when Bella thought of childhood, the memories which were called to mind were those eternal summers burned into her heart. Forks, Washington lazy days where she learned to cook and simply existed as a little girl should.</p><p>Sarah Black teaching her to make strawberry lemonade while Rachel and Rebecca made sure Bella didn't cut herself. Billy and Charlie watching them all as they played tag, times when Bella fell on her face half a dozen times while the cloudy sky just moved lazily overhead.</p><p>Then Renee would come, take Bella back to the life of playing adult because her mother's own immature ways.</p><p>Except the gold of those days, the magic of those summers would revive like a ritual every year as she returned to Forks and started all over again.</p><p>Picking up where they all left off.</p><p>As if it would always stay, right where Bella left it.</p><p>This though?</p><p>At this moment?</p><p>Visceral terror was rocking through her body as she realized that the worst was coming true. She didn't care that tears and snot were beginning to flow out of her like a baby. There was still so much!</p><p>SO MUCH BELLA NEEDED TO DO!</p><p>To make up for! She still had to earn his forgiveness! Bella needed to unbreak his heart! Charlie needed to be convinced that Carlisle would take care of her! That she would be alright!</p><p>It couldn't end like this!</p><p>Bella knew her struggling was frantic and wild but she didn't care. She didn't care. She didn't care.</p><p>Not about her back which felt like it was about to shatter, her sore elbows, the incessant pounding woodpecker at the back of her head, or the fact that she was shaking with the force of her wailing.</p><p>"I said stop!" the man shook her roughly as, the woman, Kristie, handed Charlie off to Laurent. The dark skinned Vampire shot a glare at the man holding Bella as he snarled,</p><p>"She is mine! You do not break her Riley! If you break her then all of this is pointless! Do you understand?! Pointless!"</p><p>Riley...</p><p>He ducked his head a bit as if he'd been told off for breaking a vase from playing ball in the house and not almost ruining Laurent's revenge plot. His hold on Bella shifted from her coat to a rather aggressive grip on her long brown hair which had the Human girl crying out in pain as he tore some of it out with his brutal strength.</p><p>Her head started to sting sharply and Bell just knew he'd torn some of the skin of her scalp, but she pushed all her own agony away as Laurent picked Charlie up by the front of his flannel shirt. Her father fought wildly and uselessly as he only had words for Bella,</p><p>"RUN BELLA! GET OUT OF HERE!"</p><p>"Little Mrs. Cullen," Laurent chuckled as he ignored Charlie's pointless attempts to fight back and addressed Bella directly. Inhaling deeply the Vampire's chuckle grew even deeper,</p><p>"Ooooh! Carlisle's scent is all over you... It's in your skin and flesh like he owns you.. He does doesn't he?</p><p>"His Venom is practically in your veins, he was so tricky tricky that day... Making us believe you were Edward's. You both did this and you both deserve to suffer.</p><p>"You know you're such a boring little thing. If you had all just been honest nobody would be dead and we wouldn't have to be doing this! Why did you all have to be so deceitful?"</p><p>Oh, if Charlie's life wasn't hanging in the balance so precariously Bella would have rioted. Boo Hoo, poor James and his entitlement! His disregard for how large the Olympic Coven was and his reckless behavior as he practically danced to his destruction because he was an absolute asshole who had bitten off more than he could possibly chew, let alone swallow!</p><p>As if the Cullens wouldn't have done the same exact thing to him if Bella had belonged to anyone else but Carlisle!</p><p>The words had a different effect on Charlie, causing him to let out a strangled cry, "Leave her alone! She hasn't done anything! She's just a little girl!</p><p>"Whatever Cullen did she's not part of it! She's just a kid! She's never hurt anyone!"</p><p>"Let him go!" Bella cried out helplessly knowing in her heart Laurent wouldn't give her up. Never ever would the Vampire release her, but Charlie? Her father had nothing to do with any of this, she knew she was begging but she couldn't care. Charlie deserved so much better than the wretch of a daughter he'd been given.</p><p>Charlie was such a good man. One which she and Carlisle had just walked all over without even a by your leave. They'd just kept taking advantage, even now Charlie didn't know the time she spent with Carlisle. That every night her lover would come to her, her father just simply didn't think she had it in her to be so duplicitous.</p><p>To agree and appear to obey him only to turn around and just keep sneaking around.</p><p>Charlie couldn't even think of that sort of thing because he was just too good. He didn't see people as horrible and criminal. All the signs of Carlisle loving her had been overlooked because Charlie's ability to just carry on with his firm belief that everyone was truly innocent until they were proven guilty.</p><p>Even now, she was going to break his heart even more. Bella sobbed a desperately, even as the storm in her grew into a bestial thing which was capable of devouring star systems in one gulp, "Carlisle and I killed James! You know it was us! Our kids only did what we told them!</p><p>"Let my dad go! He doesn't even know! He doesn't even know! This is about making Carlisle suffer right?! To make him feel what you felt! When we burned James to ash in the middle of the desert! Then it's about me!"</p><p>Weakly she tried to fight against all the searing pain and dizziness threatening to overtake her, "Please! Please!"</p><p>"I'm glad you're begging... James didn't get you to beg did he? But I have managed it, and it feels so good," Laurent smiled but it was not bright or twisted, there was a sanctification to it like feeling the cool rain after a scorching summer day,</p><p>"But I can't let your little daddy go. I need him to make you suffer. If you suffer then your Mate suffers."</p><p>Something sadistic colored his grin then, as he began to bare his perfect white teeth to her in a threat, "And you and I both know there is only way to bring him ultimate pain.</p><p>"Isn't that right little Bella?"</p><p>"Bella what- What-" Charlie stuttered out, completely lost. Bella had just confessed to murdering someone with Carlisle and now this stranger was saying she knew what ultimate suffering was.That she had been through torture.</p><p>Charlie still didn't trust her, she was still a stranger, and it made her feel like her heart was splintering even as the Vampire brought her father close as Laurent inhaled deeply. Ice cold horror filled her as she realized exactly what he was about to do.</p><p>Something akin to a silent grenade went off in her heart as Laurent's teeth ripped into Charlie's throat.</p><p>Her own lungs likely ripping raw as she let out another blood curdling helpless scream at the sight of it.</p><p>Then, like some sort of twisted act of mercy Laurent threw Charlie to the ground where Bella was forced to watch her father begin twisting in absolute agony.</p><p>Her own mind recalled the torture of Venom and brimstone as it had flowed into her from just her arm. It had felt like days, but Bella's own experience had only lasted for, at most, half a minute.</p><p>Half a minute of the worst hell she'd ever experience until the day Carlisle put her through it himself, and Bella willingly bore her flesh to him like a sacrificial lamb. Letting him give her three days of torment.</p><p>But this wasn't that.</p><p>Charlie didn't know like Bella.</p><p>She'd know both times.</p><p>Charlie didn't get that luxury.</p><p>"STOP IT NO NO!" Bella screamed feeling bile rising up making her throat burn pathetically in the face of the absolute anguish which her father was experiencing. White raging fire was racking it's way through his fragile Human body and Charlie was convulsing with the the force of it.</p><p>"Watch," Laurent was in her face suddenly, he sounded like he was in awe at the fact that Bella was screeching wildly at the sight of her father's body tossing itself around on forest floor,</p><p>"Watch him suffer a while and then witness as I destroy him before he could become anything close to useful."</p><p>Charlie squirmed and it seemed that all thought of what was occurring around him left as the man began to scream out for something other than Bella. It was guttural, raw, and it yanked at Bella's heart like a puppet master when her father writhed in agony as he began to wail,</p><p>"MAKE IT STOP! NO! MAKE IT STOP! MAKE IT STOP!"</p><p>Then Bella's throat tightened and she felt like she'd never feel joy again as the man who loved her more than anything roared out,</p><p>"KILL ME! JUST KILL ME!"</p><p>She was lucky.</p><p>As her mind was not clouded by fear of Vampires or enthralled by their beauty. All the terror and torment Bella was experiencing was for her father.</p><p>Charlie needed her.</p><p>And in that moment Bella realized just how lucky she was, as in a desperate act, she yanked her truck keys out of her hoodie pocket. Laurent looked at her like she was an idiot before Bella grit her teeth and did it.</p><p>It all happened in moment, the spaces between heartbeats. Bella barely even felt real as she made the movements. As if everything around her was some sort of practice run and she'd be able to rewind if she flubbed it.</p><p>Despite that sensation, she got it in one go.</p><p>Ripping her stitches in the process, Bella grabbed her gift from Jasper and just let it loose.</p><p>Her wrapped up busted hand pulled the trigger of the lighter as her right hand busted the flimsy seal on the travel hairspray.</p><p>The closest part of Laurent had been his legs so that was what burst into a raging inferno like hell fire rising from the ground to consume him for his sin of harming Charlie Swan.</p><p>A truly good man.</p><p>His red eyes widened in absolute terror and utter shock as he began screaming. all the while he made feeble attempts to rip his clothing off but the marble of his skin had already been licked by the fires.</p><p>It was clear he'd expected something trivial and useless, likely he expected a more Human form of mace he could mock or else the Vampire would have moved. Bella knew that she'd only managed it because of that.</p><p>Because he underestimated her family's ability to protect her and her own reckless need to keep Charlie safe from being hurt again.</p><p>Bella half expect Riley to snap her neck but it seemed natural fear beat out his anger as the Vampire tossed her away from himself screaming bloody murder so that could back himself away from the raging fireball Laurent was becoming while he thrashed on the ground against wet the brush and foliage.</p><p>Riley and Kristie turned their ruby red eyes onto her as the only sound was Laurent's and Charlie's throes of agony.</p><p>Both dying in fire.</p><p>It was a frozen slice of time, one second, when Riley rushed towards her teeth bared in what seemed like slow motion before-</p><p>A flash of copper appeared.</p><p>Edward rolled on the ground having tackled Riley, Bella could only hold her breath as the two struggled violently before her.</p><p>Distantly the Human girl realized that a silver Wolf had arrived in the same moment as Edward.</p><p>Leah's teeth chomped as Kristie bolted from the quickly decaying plan. Later Bella would smile and shake her head as Leah broke it down like her greatest hits but at the moment Bella's focus was caught up on the Vampires scrambling, one attempting to get to her and the other once more fighting like the devil in order to preserve her alive.</p><p>While Edward was fast, apparently Riley was stronger as the red eyed Vampire rolled with the punches and managed to toss the copper haired boy away, slamming him into a tree.</p><p>Edward wasn't having it though as he rushed back for more. Swifter than Bella could truly process he pounced madly onto Riley's back, the Cullen boy's hand latching onto the other Vampire's brown hair like taking retribution for the treatment of Bella's own head. Savagely, the copper haired boy attempted to sink his teeth into his opponent's crystalline spine right at the base of his neck.</p><p>Riley managed to swing the telepath off of his back which caused Edward to fumble and roll across the ground which was littered with leaves and branches along with melted snow.</p><p>Slamming a boot clad foot into Edward's back, Bella saw her son's eyes grow wide in panic as, in a flash, Riley suddenly tore Edward's right arm from his body.</p><p>As she witnessed Edward's dismemberment, Bella found herself screaming so loud it drowned out Charlie's agonizing cries.</p><p>Riley shoved the one armed Vampire across the forest floor with his foot, dragging him through leaves and mud, the red eyed Vampire scoffed as if he was unimpressed, "You're pathetic! I don't know how Laurent and Victoria haven't managed to just kill you all already."</p><p>Edward suddenly laughed, his smile manic, "Get the hell away from my mom."</p><p>And Bella felt the storm inside of her ignite like an atomic bomb going off.</p><p>Carlisle.</p><p>He appeared slamming into Riley like a fright train as he bared his teeth.</p><p>Bella watched her Mate absolutely wild eyed and practically feral with it as Carlisle very nearly danced. Riley's' attacks only seemed to skim and roll off him.</p><p>Riley swung right and Carlisle let him follow through but permitted the momentum to spin his own body. The moment Riley's back was to him, Carlisle slammed his palm into Riley's throat with a force which had cracks appearing in his face, before lifting him into the air with one smooth but brutal motion, and hammering his entire body onto the forest floor. Carlisle ended it,  slamming his other fist down onto Riley's face like a hammer, shattering it down the fissures which had already formed.</p><p>Then the Calvary arrived as the rest of the Quileute Wolves rushed through the clearing accompanied by the rest of the Cullens as most of them pressed forwards to follow Leah's' hot pursuit of the Vampire which had escaped.</p><p>"Alice, Jasper stay, but hold your breath." Carlisle ordered before they could follow Rosalie and Emmett with the rest of the hunting party,</p><p>"Bella's stitches have torn."</p><p>Edward groaned and Bella watched as he attempted to reattach his own arm, but she could barely contain her own shaking sobs which still wracked her body. Helpless against everything that had just occurred.</p><p>Charlie was still screaming.</p><p>"My daddy!" Bella choked out deliriously as her hand was beginning to throb hotly where her stitches had ripped through the delicate flesh of her palm. It's pain was deep and Bella feared that the understitching may have also been compromised.</p><p>Carlisle finally turned his topaz gaze onto her then as he spoke to their children, while indicating a hand towards Riley's shattered form,</p><p>"Add this one to the fire your mother started."</p><p>Bella inhaled sharply even though she had snot in her nose which ran down her throat and made her choke. She watched as her Mate rose to his feet before approaching her slowly as if she was a feral animal.</p><p>Perhaps she was as her hands were still clutching Jasper's so very thoughtful gift to her as the adrenaline was beginning to fade and her dizziness was transforming into a bone weary need to collapse and wake up in a hundred years like Rip Van Winkle.</p><p>"Isabella, Isabella I know you're having a very bad day," Carlisle's tone was steady and gentle, as he drew closer to her, palms out placatingly. Even though she could clearly feel his half of their universe attempting to fold over and consume her's in a desperate embrace to perhaps reignite the stars.</p><p>This wasn't her Mate.</p><p>This was Dr. Cullen who needed to remain level headed as he informed her, "But you're going to have to make a choice."</p><p>"Save him," Bella begged as she felt herself begin becoming lost to everything as Carlisle shook his head,</p><p>"Bella, Darling I cannot do for him what I did for you.</p><p>"The Venom was injected into too large of an artery and it took us too long to get here. It's already reached his heart."</p><p>Carlisle knelt before her then then, cool hands cupped her shoulders and the storm blew away as the eye of it encompassed her like a sweet blanket of love and affection. Her hands released her weapon in a pathetic show of acceptance of his touch. His face was open and plain as he gave her the options,</p><p>"I can destroy him, or we can allow immortality to take hold. It has to be your choice."</p><p>"Dammit!" Jasper shouted like a he was attempting to shatter time and space as he slammed his foot into a boulder causing it to pulverize into dust,</p><p>"DAMMIT DAMMIT! "</p><p>Alice covered her face as if she was weeping, the force of her exhale causing her granite form to shudder as if she was mourning some great future only she could have seen.</p><p>Kate and Irina arrived upon the chaotic scene then as Edward sat up holding his arm in place until it's reattachment was a bit more stable. Bella ignored it all.</p><p>She ignored Jasper viciously chucking pieces of Riley into Laurent's kindling corpse while Alice helped slowly as if she never wanted to actually finish and face what was happening while Charlie Swan screamed for someone to kill him.</p><p>To end it all.</p><p>With her good hand Bella gripped onto Carlisle's jacket in a desperate bid to ground herself and cease her crying. Helping, only just barely, the connection was enough to have her heaving out like a small lost child,</p><p>"He's my daddy Carlisle."</p><p>And the selfishness of it all.</p><p>Oh the grasping desperation of her decision was so vicious she couldn't even look him in the eyes because of how wrong she knew it was.</p><p>How evil it made her to make such a choice.</p><p>When she did look up though, she could see it in his golden irises that he knew, and that he'd accepted it.</p><p>Because Carlisle accepted all of her.</p><p>The ugliness too.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>SORRY THIS TOOK SO LONG??? I had two FULL days of work and was too tired to work on it at all! Now though I should be on track for regularly scheduled posting!!!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0029"><h2>29. Chapter 29</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>It's not curtains yet, we still have to set the stage.</p><p>Don't you know? These thing are never easy.</p><p>What do I mean?</p><p>Oh, Happy endings of course!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>A single Wolf had stayed behind and Bella recognized him vaguely as one of the ones she could not identify at the meeting but his dark grey fur set him apart, as well as the fact that he was easily between Jacob and Sam in size.</p><p>The Wolf was practically pacing, Carlisle had dispatched the threat and so Bella knew this member of the Pack was listening in on their conversation.</p><p>Bella sort of recalled they shared thoughts. Hadn't Jacob said as much?</p><p>So he must be sharing with the other Quileutes the information Carlisle had just declared regarding Charlie's current predicament. Informing them of Bella's choice as the last of the adrenaline faded from her body causing her to fall forwards only to be caught in the gentle cradle of her Mate's arms.</p><p>There was a tension practically seeping from his marble skin that Bella knew had been building since her accident at school, had begged for a release and only been partially sated by Carlisle's fight with Riley but would not completely subside until she was safe and the crisis had passed.</p><p>Everything was starting to swim again as her brain was preparing itself to shut down but Bella found herself jolted as Irina who, in a show of speed yet unseen, had thrown herself over Charlie's thrashing body. Baring her teeth like a snarling lion the beautiful woman's features grew fierce yet frantic,</p><p>"You can't kill him! He's mine! Carlisle you can't! Please! I've found him and I can't let you destroy him!</p><p>"I've waited longer than you! I deserve him! I don't care what Bella says It's not her choice to make anymore!"</p><p>Carlisle closed his eyes at the display, Bella could tell he was tired, if not physically then mentally as he'd held himself back for so long. Yet he needed to continue to shoulder everything for just a bit longer.</p><p>Bella swallowed hard as confusion tumbled through her like one of those gumballs in those machines with the fancy ramp dispensers at the dramatic display. Her Mate opened his eyes then as he offered Bella a tender smile, being strong for everyone else,</p><p>"Irina, calm yourself. Bella doesn't want him to be destroyed. She wants him to join us.. or I suppose, to join you."</p><p>It was a monstrous thing.</p><p>Billy and Harry would hate her.</p><p>Immediately the Wolf which had been calmly just watching it all unfold began to snarl as he leapt toward Irina and Charlie only for Jasper and Alice to leap in front of him like a wall. Standing their ground as Edward scrambled to his feet while still holding his arm in place until it it's reattachment was more secure.</p><p>The telepath's tone was vicious as he hissed out, "You don't have a right! The Treaty hasn't been broken! We didn't bite him and your Pack's view on the matter is a little less important than his daughter's!"'</p><p>Snapping his jowls the grey wolf reared back, slamming his paws to the ground as if attempting to intimidate the Cullens. There was a look in Carlisle's eyes then, one Bella knew only meant that he was about to pour ice down the Wolf's veins as her Mate boomed in a calm commanding voice,</p><p>"Leave. Your part here is done. No matter what your people think on the matter this accident still needs to be staged and the nature of their departure from the school means we have little time to do it!</p><p>"Alice cannot utilize her gift with you here to ensure success and the concealment of my family's secret."</p><p>And no matter what.</p><p>The Secret was the most important thing.</p><p>"Charlie still has 3 days," Carlisle added as if an after thought, to soothe the agitation of their tentative allies regarding the rather horrific circumstances which were crashing down around them,</p><p>"Right now, we only have minutes."</p><p>Inhaling deeply the large Wolf tossed his massive head back, upwards towards the leafy canopy as he let out a sorrowful howl. In response his Pack echoed back in the distance like a dirge for a fallen King.</p><p>For the death of a good man.</p><p>With that, the Wolf bolted into the woods, an allowance for arrangements to be made as Carlisle looked to Alice and Jasper,</p><p>"Let's stage it."</p><p>Jasper nodded jerkily, "I'll get a body and prepare for the documentation and tests to be forged."</p><p>"Edward, go call Emmett and Rosalie back, we'll need them to move the cruiser for a better death site," Carlisle insisted, before Bella could protest that, Alice shook her head aggressively,</p><p>"No, it has to be here. The teachers and parents know Bella was being driven to the hospital and if she's safe without Charlie, and Charlie's found dead in a ravine... They'll think you and her killed him because he didn't approve.</p><p>"Jasper can go get the body though, there's a doe you can get in the morgue that won't be missed."</p><p>Jasper nodded, all business as he took off towards breaking lord only knows how many laws for this goddamn choice. Bella reminded herself as she pressed her palms into her eyes that they'd have to do this no matter what she'd decided.</p><p>Still, she tried to breath and focus only on that as Charlie's cries only grew more manic as Irina held him close, rocking the man she'd been waiting for over a thousand years whispering sweet promises of forever all while stroking his cheek.</p><p>Kate had her hands pressed tenderly to her sister's shoulders in a show of support and strength. Two pillars who were ready to defend the man who was being made new.</p><p>"Irina, Bella shouldn't have to watch this, " Carlisle turned to their cousins, his tone still soft but firm,</p><p>"Take care of him elsewhere."</p><p>Bella swallowed hard as Kate replied with a modicum of distress in her angelic voice, "Carlisle we can't just run him up to Alaska in his condition and Bella's scent is all over the house."</p><p>"The cottage," Bella managed to wheeze from her place in her Mate's arms, "It's all done. The clearing is far enough from the house."</p><p>"Go," Carlisle ordered before Irina gathered Charlie up into her arms as Bella's own Mate had done for her each time she'd been injured, then the two Denali sisters ran at full tilt in the direction from which they'd arrived.</p><p>"Carlisle we still need to figure out what caused the accident," Edward ran a distressed hand through his copper hair and Bella wished her brain was working better and she could help more.</p><p>"He hit a deer," Carlisle decided and Alice groaned, so the man tried again, "a fallen tree."</p><p>"Stick with an animal!" Alice hissed clearly frustrated but not actually getting angry as her father sighed,</p><p>"A bear?"</p><p>"A bear!" Alice crowed as Edward sort of released his arm which was still obviously healing but apparently secure. The telepath pulled out his phone and began dialing, Emmett most likely, in order to get their bear...</p><p>God.</p><p>"I need you to give me Jasper's gift, you can't have it on you when the authorities get here or they'll think you set the fire," Alice put out her hand but Bella realized the girl was still a few more steps away from them than she'd normally be.</p><p>She would nod, but Bella was already on the verge of vomiting more of her stomach's lining so she simply made something like a groan of acceptance of the situation. Part of her prayed that she'd be able to stay awake for that long.</p><p>Carlisle grabbed Bella's keys and tossed them to their prescient daughter a bit haphazardly before Alice detached the Vampire Mace kit and threw the keys back nonchalantly. As if they weren't' taking precautions against Bella getting charged for patricide.</p><p>"Isabella I'm so very sorry," Carlisle stroked her hair then, running his fingers through it as he whispered to her softly,</p><p>"But I cannot be here."</p><p>Alice too, sounded as if she wished things could be different, that this wasn't the time line they'd stumbled down but had to make due anyways,</p><p>"You have to make the call Bella. When Jasper gets back and sets the fire you're going to have to wait about 15 minutes.</p><p>"Then say you passed out, and that you weren't wearing your seat belt. "</p><p>"I'll smash the windshield," Edward volunteered solemnly, likely seeing the very Visions Alice was in real time as the future shifted, changed, while some faded and their choices caused other's to solidify,</p><p>"Emmett's on his way back with the bear but we have to hurry. The Wolves are tracking Irina and Kate because they plan on destroying Charlie anyways."</p><p>"How do you know that Edward?" Carlisle demanded as the telepath made good on his decision to smash the window in,</p><p>"Alice cannot see the Wolves and they would never tell Emmett their plans."</p><p>"Leah would," Edward shouted back as he ran his foot through the cruisers windshield, shattering it from the passenger's side,</p><p>"She's with Rosalie trying to get to our Cousins through the tight pass Emmett likes racing through."</p><p>Suddenly the telepath was once more by Alice's side in a blur of color and speed, "They'll see it as a mercy killing."</p><p>"Will he be safe when they reach the house?" Carlisle pressed and Bella couldn't help but tighten her grip on her Mate's jacket as everything was becoming far to much to bear with her brain turning slowly to goop.</p><p>"There's no way to tell," Alice grit her teeth, the frustration she was feeling over their circumstances once more letting itself show.</p><p>"It's alright," Bella forced throat to work, her mouth to move only for Carlisle to practically cluck at her,</p><p>"No no no, don't talk anymore Darling, you need to save your strength. You're suffering from a major head injury and emergency services still need to be called."</p><p>"Two," she coughed because there was no way she was going to be able to hide that from him.</p><p>"Bella!" Alice sighed out as if a mountain had just toppled over on top of her, "Carlisle no! You can't treat her at all! If you do someone might notice and realize you were here!"</p><p>Emmett arrived then, barreling into the area like a bat out of hell only to pass through towards a little ways closer to the road. It was such a sight Bella had to close her eyes at the mental jostling.</p><p>"There's our bear," Edward nodded stretching his arm a bit as if making sure it was stable enough for his next proposition,</p><p>"Can we leave? Jasper will be here soon right? He'll set the fire."</p><p>"Bella's bleeding," Carlisle reminded them all, as if they couldn't smell it seeping into her bandages slowly, while her hand throbbed like some sort of macabre fruit gusher,</p><p>"I'll be the last to leave here. You go after the others. Try to make Sam see reason."</p><p>"And if he doesn't?!" Emmett suddenly boomed from his place hopping off a tree branch into the clearing, apparently having set up his portion of their stage play,</p><p>"Good old Grandpa Charlie is what? Dead?! No way in hell are we letting that happen."</p><p>"He's bonded to Irina," Edward revealed then to his brother and Bella knew, she knew. It was obvious from the way Irina had reacted. Just.. hearing the words and knowing were two completely different things.</p><p>Especially since it seemed the cotton candy in her head was threatening to pop her eyes out of their sockets.</p><p>It was difficult to process more than one or two things at the moment.</p><p>"Shit! Alright, there's no way in hell we're letting this happen," Emmett snarled and it was ferocious, powerful,</p><p>"Alice, hurry up and say we're good!"</p><p>"I'm checking Emmett! Don't rush me! We're already nearly out of time!" Alice nearly screeched, of course Carlisle made his utmost efforts to give his daughter comfort from his place kneeling and holding a rather useless and pathetic Bella Swan.</p><p>"Alice, if Charlie dies he will simply meet the fate he ought to have. No one will blame you," Carlisle's tone was soft, love and compassion coated each syllable,</p><p>"Isabella has already told you it would be alright. Hasn't she?"</p><p>That appeared to do the trick as Alice let out a stream of air before closing her eyes completely. The tiny Vampire grew still like the grave,</p><p>"Bella, you need to ask for Dr. Iris. She won't hassle you when Carlisle comes after we deal with the Wolves.</p><p>"Carlisle you have to leave with Jasper. No trailing her. No arriving at the hospital before you get the call! Nothing!</p><p>"Bella will be fine. She'll be fine."</p><p>The Human girl could literally feel the war being waged inside of him as he struggled with the very idea leaving Bella on the forest floor injured and nearly passing out. That it would be better just to leave her there suffering.</p><p>"I think I can do that."</p><p>"I'm so sorry," Alice choked on the words before turning to her brothers, "Alright, it's safe to go."</p><p>Each of the Vampires gave Bella a heavy glance. Apologies and promises all of them pouring out in those golden eyes. Volumes could be written on what their gazes contained in those moments. Bella could fill journals with what she knew they were trying to convey. Yet, if she tried the power of it would never truly come across in written word.</p><p>The feeling in that moment that these Vampires, everyone of them were not doing this for Charlie or some misguided sense of right.</p><p>They were doing it for her.</p><p>Because their love for her moved them to act and save a man they did not particularly care for or know. Yet, Bella loved him so that was enough for them. Sufficient for them to launch themselves into battle and face Wolves in hopes of saving her father.</p><p>Of course she wasn't so stupid to think that part of their determination didn't belong to Irina. The precious woman they'd all likely known since their Change. A cousin, a person beloved to them who could be called on and trusted in times of crises because they were tied by something more powerful than simple oaths and Treaties.</p><p>The world fell to it's knees for love.</p><p>And the Cullens, who lived lives of peace, would go to war for it.</p><p>Blearily, Bella watched as the seconds passed before each of them departed from the scene, the forest swallowing them up and leaving no trace of the fact that they had been there at all.</p><p>The moment the children were gone, Carlisle nuzzled the top of her head, then proceeded to inhale sharply, deeply and thoroughly as if attempting to gulp down every particle and note of her scent.</p><p>Then, a choked off strangled noise ripped it's way through him and Bella clung tighter to her Mate as he rocked back and forth, holding her in his arms. Letting himself be weak, letting himself love her fearfully as only God and the earth could bear witness. Carlisle hissed out a shuddering sigh as he slowly began stroking her back, continuing to run his other hand through her hair gently so as not to agitate the damage which had been done.</p><p>"How can I leave you here? How can I simply abandon you in the mud and dead grass? Isabella I don't know if I'm strong enough," he spoke in a whisper, and Bella could practically hear the cracks in him as he confessed to her this,</p><p>"I know it must be done, but why can I not follow you? What good will leaving you to the mercy of others do when I can begin healing you now?</p><p>"What is the point of it?!"</p><p>"You saved me already," Bella reminded him softly, still her stomach was beginning to churn and she was making a valiant attempt not to let the darkness take her while the bright spots in her vision appeared to begin shrinking,</p><p>"Alice says I'm going to be alright."</p><p>"Alice has been wrong before," Carlisle reminded her that things changed. Spur of the moment choices happened on occasion and no one could foresee them.</p><p>Not even Alice in all her power.</p><p>"What if Dr. Iris is called to someone else and I cannot get to you? Or perhaps your care is given to someone who cannot respect you or me?" Carlisle sounded so desperate and pleading that Bella wished she could talk more, wished that she could assure him without sicking up all over him.</p><p>Her esophagus was already sore from the 3 times she'd burned it that day,</p><p>And wasn't that almost comical?</p><p>All the yelling and arguing which had occurred nearly only an hour or so ago seemed as if it was decades away. Jessica's stupidity and Lauren's rather shocking yet endearing defense of Bella in the face of Principle Greene who had appeared ready to simply pin it all on Bella and be done with it.</p><p>Mr. Mallory's creepiness and Mrs. Stanley's stubborn refusal to see her daughter as anything less than perfect.</p><p>All of that belonged in a different world than the one that Bella was currently in where Carlisle Cullen was as close as his species ever came to crying with wide damp eyes while he held a very Human girl and shuddered,</p><p>"Isabella, if any of this goes wrong it will not matter to the Volturi that it was Laurent who caused it. It will only matter that this is our territory and we failed to subdue the threat before it got out of hand.</p><p>"They will deem us at fault for the risk it's posed to the Secret of our Kind."</p><p>"It won't come to that," Bella knew she was muttering but his sensitive ears would hear it anyways, it was easier to not feel nauseous if she spoke quietly. The pounding in her head too, did not feel so desperate,</p><p>"It won't. People die in accidents everyday and with the stress Charlie's been under? With us and Harry and then me getting in a fight? Of course he wasn't watching the road like he should have."</p><p>"You're going to need to cry," Carlisle reminded her but it sounded so empty save for a despondent sense of sorrow, "The call has to sound like you truly believe your father is dying in a fire and you are helpless to save him."</p><p>Bella's throat tightened and she knew.</p><p>Oh she knew.</p><p>"Carlisle, Honey, I'm not going to see my father again or he'll want to kill me," she choked out the words and it ached like a thousand days they'd never spend together.</p><p>Like the pain of Charlie never seeing her graduate save for whatever recording Carlisle managed to get. It tore through her like the absolute agony of Charlie being unable to give her away at their wedding, because she would want Renee to at least get that when Charlie was getting all of Bella's sunrises and sunsets that would stretch out however long their forever lasted.</p><p>Bella would mourn and thrash for all the hurt Charlie would have to face against Harry and Billy who would rather their childhood friend be dead.</p><p>Burned up and mangled in a car crash or bones turned to dust while Charlie's throat was ripped opened viciously by Laurent. Literally anything but to have Charlie Swan golden eyed, heart tied to a woman who had longed for him over a thousand years.</p><p>A rustic mountain man.</p><p>Oh how funny that would be to tease Irina . How Bella had assumed wrong. That Irina hadn't meant someone like Emmett exactly. No Irina had meant someone less burly but more of a man who could spend days and days just enjoying the quiet of nature as he sat back with the people he loved.</p><p>Now, Bella could give him it all.</p><p>Not just a palatable truth.</p><p>The very real, completely pure truth.</p><p>That would all have to come later.</p><p>After Charlie had suffered, even more than he had until now under the secrets that had been hidden in the shadows of their house.</p><p>Only if Sam could let it go, see it as the blessing it was despite all the sacrifices and suffering which would have to occur. If only he could see that Bella meant well despite how selfish she was being. That even though she was thirsty for it, grasping and gnashing her teeth that she just wanted her father.</p><p>That's all she wanted.</p><p>It was childish and a little more than cruel, but Bella didn't think she could ever forgive any of the Wolves if they did it. If they killed Charlie because of their limited acceptance of what 'living' truly was and they took away her chance to have him forever, Bella had no idea what she might do.</p><p>Irina, at least Irina's blooming Bond would break and she'd only think on him with fond sorrow, perhaps ask Bella questions on what Charlie could have been like. The Denali woman would paint pictures in her mind of the life they could have had but she'd heal.</p><p>She'd move on.</p><p>Because their Bond was still in it's fragile stages.</p><p>Slowly a monstrous thing clawed it's way out of the fog and scrambled meat of Bella's brain as she realized that she would likely lose her mind with grief should she lose Charlie.</p><p>And Bella wouldn't know if he was safe until Carlisle got to her in the hospital.</p><p>"Trust me," she rasped out harshly all of her might and bitter determination that she could manage was poured into the words, "I'm not going to have a problem making the call."</p><p>Bella was already having a hard time not crying right then and there. Those tears needed to be held back and saved for the proper moments. And if she did it right, she may just get more than she ever thought the universe was ever capable of giving her. It was selfish to be sure, but Bella reasoned, so long as she didn't fool herself into pretending this was all for Charlie and Irina then she couldn't be as bad as she thought.</p><p>As they sat there for what couldn't have been very long, Bella realized that many of her aches were being soothed by Carlisle's cooler temperature so she let herself sink into it until Jasper came.</p><p>And arrive he did as Carlisle shielded Bella from the fact that their empathic son was loading a corpse with Charlie's clothing into the cruiser and staging the scene as best as he could. Bella allowed her Mate this, she'd seen enough for the day.</p><p>Bella didn't want to deal with more and she refused to look up from where her gaze was hidden in Carlisle's chest.</p><p>Jasper worked quickly, at a speed she knew was inhuman as the sound of creaking metal as well as, eventually, fire began to reach her ears. Gasoline, the scent of it was thick in the air when Carlisle finally saw fit to pull himself away from her. Bella experienced the loss of him keenly in her sore and aching body while her Mate laid a reverent press of lips upon her forehead.</p><p>"I will come for you the moment you call, I will not hesitate," Carlisle swore valiantly and Bella knew they were being etched into his heart in the same way they had burned into her soul,</p><p>"I love you, and I will always come for you."</p><p>"I love you too," Bella's grogginess was taking over as she forced herself to keep her mind as alert as the situation could manage. It was getting nearly impossible but she still needed to manage another 15 minutes.</p><p>"Carlisle," Jasper's tone was bordering on urgent and it was then that Carlisle finally stood up and his hold on Bella completely slipped away from her body. She could no longer feel the cool comfort of his familiar form, but the harsh press of mud, leaves, and dead grass.</p><p>"I'll see you soon," Carlisle promised at last, Bella could see it in his eyes, the absolute battle he was waging simply to leave her so Bella did the only thing she could.</p><p>"Go."</p><p>And as always, he listened.</p><p>Bella lay there, alone, truly exposed to the elements.</p><p>She stared at her phone, trying to keep her mind busy as the minutes passed and the burning cruiser's smoke began to sting the inside of her nose as well as her lungs from proximity. It was a practice in will power as Bella grit her teeth and reminded herself that everyone was relying on this.</p><p>Everyone was doing their part.</p><p>She needed to be strong for them.</p><p>To stay awake and call at the proper moment.</p><p>Finally, 15 minutes passed and Bella let herself pass back into the other world.</p><p>The one where Lauren and Jessica got into fights over her and Mr. Mallory was an absolute pervert.</p><p>The universe where Harry's heart attack was her fault and Charlie Swan was burning to death after hitting an animal in his cruiser.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0030"><h2>30. Chapter 30</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Sometimes the only rest you get is when you die</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>"911, what's your emergency?"</p><p>It was sunny out.</p><p>Unusual for a winter's day in Forks, Washington.</p><p>But it was sunny nonetheless as Bella allowed everything she was feeling to flood into her the moment she heard those words.</p><p>Sobs rocked her body for the man who was going through absolute hell while being hunted by Wolves as she vomited the words she'd been carefully instructed to. Like an earthquake her bones rattled with the force of it,</p><p>"My dad and I were in an accident! The cars on fire! I can't get him out, I can't! Oh god oh god! Help me!"</p><p>It was quick then, as swift as that kind of call could be as Bella let the hot tears flow, causing her head to throb, "I hit my head at school! Please! I- I don't know where I am! We hit something and I just woke up and I can't get my dad out! He's still in there!</p><p>"He's still in there! He's my daddy please!"</p><p>All the rage at the universe she was feeling released in a torrential downpour as Bella stuck to the script.</p><p>When the police arrived and really truly realized who Bella was and who was supposedly in the car, one of the men fell to his knees and began crying like a child. He was younger, new probably, but Bella grit her teeth as she allowed herself to continue to wail as her lungs burned from all the smoke and fire and screaming from everything which had happened just before.</p><p>As one of the officers came to get her Bella had no more fight in her, not after Riley or Laurent so the girl's body was limp and tired, forcing him to drag her away from the scene until one of the EMTs scolded him for moving her at all.</p><p>The EMT sat her down away from the smoldering wreckage and gave her a soft encouraging smile, "Hey, I'm Lionel and I'm going to check you over and ask you a few questions alright?"</p><p>Bella hummed in agreement, unable to nod for fear of making her vision swim again, before he began to check her over, ask her questions, her timeline why she was with her father and where they were going.</p><p>She gave them all of it.</p><p>Well as best as she could, "I don't know what happened, I hit my head at school, I was dizzy. I threw up twice."</p><p>Everything was jumbled and Bella knew that her rather massive concussion made her look more and more like the poor innocent girl who's father just died in a terrible accident.</p><p>She was the reason for it though.</p><p>And nobody would ever know but her family and the Wolves.</p><p>"Is there anyone we can call?" Lionel asked her as she was loaded up into the back of the ambulance. He was middle aged, nearly the same age as Charlie and had dark ebony skin which was nearly as black as his hair.</p><p>His partner was younger but hadn't said much to her. Not even as he climbed into the back of the ambulance and shut the doors.</p><p>Bella's hand had been rewrapped with an emergency bandage to replace the soiled one. Most of her body was still sore as she stiffly lay in the gurney. Smoke was no doubt still in her lungs just a bit as she rasped out a harsh breath before whimpering, still red faced,</p><p>"My mom's in Florida. I only have my boyfriend."</p><p>"Alright," Lionel smiled at her softly, the corner of his eyes crinkling comfortingly as the ambulance began moving,</p><p>"List his number and we'll call him as soon as you arrive in the ER."</p><p>"Is Dr. Cullen working today?" the younger man suddenly asked and Bella realized that while Lionel didn't know, his partner did. Bella was surprised that the younger man's tone was gentle, kind even as he'd posed the rather inappropriate question.</p><p>Lionel looked at the the other EMT as if he'd gone off on a tangent, but before he could ask or scold his coworker for being unprofessional Bella managed to shudder,</p><p>"No, they were going hiking."</p><p>The man nodded slowly then as he likely realized how rather crass it appeared for him to know such a thing, to ask about it without even knowing Bella personally. Despite it he sort of mumbled something that Bella couldn't hear.</p><p>Lionel proved himself a rather smart sort of man as he puzzled out exactly what the other man was implying before he looked at Bella sharply, clearly seeing her with new eyes.</p><p>It was a testament to their professionalism, despite the lapse the younger man had shown, that they said nothing further on the matter even as Bella signed her name on the paperwork stating she indeed rode in the ambulance and she or her insurance would pay for it.</p><p>Bella was rushed into the ER, on the very gurney she'd been transported in. Though her condition was far from critical, the two blows to her head had gone untreated and unchecked for far too long.</p><p>Lionel fired off questions about her insurance and the information they required to locate her file and the first thing Bella said instead of a proper reply was,</p><p>"I want Dr. Iris."</p><p>The EMT sort of looked at her like she'd gone completely delirious, which was fair as the spots hadn't faded completely and Bella felt like she was in that space between sleeping and waking but only maintained her grip on the physical because Lionel was constantly nudging her.</p><p>"I'll see what I can do," the EMT sighed a bit but pressed on as if she hadn't neglected his questions simply by asking them again. This time, Bella answered them the best she could while seesawing over the rather precarious edge of unconsciousness.</p><p>"Miss Swan!" Lionel shouted but it was over.</p><p>Bella couldn't do it anymore.</p><p>Her last task had been completed and exhaustion crashed around her. Perhaps if the stars had reignited themselves she would have managed but as it was, the electric storm had fizzled everything out but itself and the vast dark black.</p><p>She had no dreams in that abyss which swallowed her and, looking back, she of course knew that they'd likely made many attempts to wake her right the hell up. Two knocks to the head which had you feeling like church bell in the midst of Mass and seeing spots were not something you were supposed to sleep with.</p><p>Bella did though.</p><p>And in that darkness she floated until suddenly it became soft like a warm blanket.</p><p>Suddenly a pinprick of light appeared in that bleak space before two, three, then...</p><p>The universe reignited and Bella took a deep gulp of air as her mind launched itself into the waking world. Her lungs burned like a brush fire and Bella's entire body ached like..</p><p>Well, like she'd been rolled down a hill in a police cruiser and tossed around by a Vampire after already having suffered a concussion..</p><p>"Isabella, it's alright, I'm here," Carlisle's soft, earnest tones filled Bella's ears and the space between them once more awakened into it's proper nebulous atmosphere,</p><p>"You're alright, you're going to be fine."</p><p>She continued to gulp down air as if she hadn't breathed since passing out and watched as her Mate pressed his thumb down on the Call button to alert whatever Doctor she'd ended up being assigned of her consciousness.</p><p>"Charlie," Bella wheezed, because Carlisle was clearly fine and she had no doubt the children were safe as well, or else her Mate would not be as put together as he currently was.</p><p>The clothes he was wearing was very much athletic gear, but it was not the same outfit from before. Her brain reminded her that those clothes likely smelled of smoke from Laurent and Riley's pyre.</p><p>"Oh, Isabella," Carlisle gathered her good hand into his own cool palms before he kissed her fingers reverently. The doors to the hospital room burst opened and Bella's eyes shot to the newcomer.</p><p>Familiar, but barely. Dr. Iris' name was happily displayed on her badge and Bella was pleased to find it was the woman who had been talking to Carlisle during Bella's own wait in the hall reading The Tale of Genji.</p><p>Dr. Iris' natural hair was pulled back and she offered Bella a very kind smile. A rather young doctor, no more than 35, if that. Only Bella was a bit surprised that she was clearly trying to ignore Carlisle completely as she informed her patient,</p><p>"I'm so glad to see your awake. How are you feeling?"</p><p>"Like I got ran over by a 8 wheeler," Bella huffed the words out rather harshly without actually meaning to, likely due to all the pain she was still experiencing. Carlisle lightly ran his slender chilled fingers up Bella's bare arm and she belatedly realized she was wearing a hospital gown.</p><p>"Perhaps something stronger is in order," Carlisle mused, his golden eyes staying fixed on Bella like they were bolted down, onto her form.</p><p>"Now that you're awake that would be fine," Dr. Iris nodded slowly as she pulled Bella's chart out from where it was tucked under her arm,</p><p>"I'm sorry Miss Swan, but I have to ask you what you remember from the accident. Just basics is fine, I don't need details."</p><p>Heaving another large, scorching breath Bella filed through her brain and relayed what she could manage,</p><p>"Not much. I mean, I remember Jessica grabbing me and hitting my head at school. Charlie picked me up and was going to bring me here...."</p><p>Bella trailed off and choked up as she recalled everything that had transpired after that. The blood and chaos.</p><p>"I don't remember much after... Not until I woke up and-"</p><p>Cutting herself Bella was attempting to hold back another sob, she could feel the tears stinging at her eyes as Carlisle brought himself even closer to her. Grazing his cold lips against her hairline.</p><p>"Charlie!" Bella knew it was more of a whimper than a wail but she was still so tired, "Carlisle where's my daddy? Where is he?"</p><p>"Oh Isabela," Carlisle reached out then and stroked her face.</p><p>"You've suffered two concussions, several contusions all over your body, there was a little smoke in your lungs and severe muscle strain in your right leg," Dr. Iris informed her lightly, as if she was about to break the entire world like an egg over Bella's head and was genuinely remorseful over it,</p><p>"Your stitches in your left hand also tore but we've got that patched up and your cannula should take care of oxygenating you and getting that smoke out."</p><p>Carlisle, a bit selfishly, interrupted, "You were very very lucky Darling. The injuries you have suffered will heal with time and rest."</p><p>Dr. Iris appeared a bit unhappy that Carlisle was doing her job and Bella could understand that the woman was clearly trying to break this to her softly. Normally Bella would have appreciated it but at the moment she cared little for herself.</p><p>"And Charlie? Carlisle he's my daddy, you have to tell me!" Bella choked out and was desperate with it as a harsh clawed monster tore it's way up her body,</p><p>"Tell me my dad's alright."</p><p>"I'll let you," Dr. Iris sighed a bit as if she genuinely wished it were someone else and not Carlisle Cullen breaking whatever news needed to be given. Bella would not have had it any other way though.</p><p>Who else could tell her the absolute truth?</p><p>Her Mate sat up straighter and Bella focused only on him and all the immense space crammed between the inches which separated them while Carlisle kissed her hand once more before very calmly, delicately declaring,</p><p>"I'm so sorry, but Charlie did not survive the accident. When the paramedics arrived he was beyond saving.</p><p>"Nothing could have been done. It was quick, they believe he was already gone before the fire began. He likely did not suffer."</p><p>Something feral ripped through her as Bella choked and allowed whatever tears were left to fall as she knew better. Charlie had suffered, might still be suffering a fate worst than burning to death in less than a few hours. Carlisle stroked her arm and whispered softly,</p><p>"Isabella, even though his heart has stopped, his love for you will always live on. Nothing can break that, so long as you remember him Charlie will be given immortality.</p><p>"No matter how limited it may seem."</p><p>Dr. Iris turned her head almost scandalized as Carlisle kissed Bella Swan then and there in the Hospital while she sobbed like an infant. Yet, something like a trumpet of triumph burst through her still beating heart as Carlisle's words sunk into her and became a truth nothing could take from her.</p><p>A hope.</p><p>"I'm here," Carlisle promised against her lips and it must have seemed almost brutal as Bella begged him,</p><p>"Don't leave. Please."</p><p>"I won't."</p><p>Carlisle of course did his best to keep that promise and Bella was thankful. Technically since he was only her boyfriend he had no say over her treatment. She did her best to listen to his advice and was happy to follow whatever he recommended.</p><p>There was no way he'd risk her health in anything.</p><p>Bella had woken up in the early evening and was going to spend the night so that her concussion could be monitored. Her stay would not be long, which was why she hadn't expected any visitors. Nurse Philips and a man who introduced himself as Nurse Hannady were the only ones in and out of the room save for Dr. Iris who had taken Carlisle aside once for a heated conversation, the woman had even asked him to leave when Bella was to be informed of her treatment regimen.</p><p>Of course, at Bella's insistence her Mate was allowed to stay but Dr. Iris was obviously a bit reluctant about it. The whole thing made Bella wonder how bad it would have been if they'd gotten someone else if Alice had seen Dr. Iris as the optimum result.</p><p>Bella expected no one else unless Renee ended up arriving much earlier than expected.</p><p>What she got though, was Lauren Mallory practically skidding into the hospital room while Carlisle sat stalwartly reading to Bella from Petrarch's original Italian Canzoniere.</p><p>"You can't be here! There's a list!" Nurse Phillips scolded and Lauren shoved herself into the room anyways which caused the Vampire to close his book and stand up. Likely fully prepared to scold the Nurse for not being more aggressive in keeping Bella's privacy.</p><p>"Bella!" Lauren heaved out the word like it's weight was equal to a mill stone,</p><p>"Tell them I can stay!"</p><p>Nurse Phillips laid hold of the blond girl and Bella sighed, knowing that she owed it to Lauren,</p><p>"She can stay. She's... a friend of mine."</p><p>A rather annoying glance to Carlisle from the Nurse had the Vampire scratching the bridge of his nose and letting out a sigh. There was a beat and he grit his teeth,</p><p>"Isabella said she could stay, why are you looking to me?"</p><p>Nurse Phillips released the girl and put her hands up in a show of surrender as if she wasn't going to be responsible if something horrible happened. Like Carlisle and Lauren murdered her and ran away together or an equally dramatic scenario.</p><p>Lauren marched over a bit hunted looking, which, to be fair, made sense. Pursing her lips the other girl looked Carlisle up and down. It was less predatory and more assessing as the man sat himself back down in the chair which had been part of the room.</p><p>"Where's your mom?" Lauren asked immediately, as she tore her eyes from the Vampire who had picked his Italian poetry right back up. Green murky eyes bored into Bella a bit more aggressively than expected.</p><p>Perhaps she didn't know how to show concern very well...</p><p>Her attempt at comfort had been a bit stilted too.</p><p>"Mrs. Dwyer is on a plane as we speak," Carlisle informed the blonde girl and Lauren cast him a bit of an uneasy glance, her eyes narrowed as if in suspicion,</p><p>"I didn't ask you."</p><p>Bella coughed and wondered why the entire female population had decided they hated him all of a sudden as Carlisle sighed,</p><p>"Isabella shouldn't be speaking more than she needs to. There was smoke in her lungs and she requires rest."</p><p>"Right, shit," Lauren kicked her foot against the tile flooring as if she was lost in the middle of mall while on a family vacation to a completely different part of the country,</p><p>"Sorry... About, your dad..."</p><p>Carlisle closed his eyes in obvious silent horror at the clumsy way it was delivered like Charlie had just broke a leg or was forced into retirement. Bella though ignored him and took a slow breath as she tried not to let herself be overwhelmed all over by the fact that her father was lost to her.</p><p>Would be for a very long time.</p><p>Ducking her head Bella just sort of nodded slowly, her skull was still a bit sore but nowhere near as bad as it had been just hours earlier when everything had first transpired. Carlisle next to her had the Bond feeling fresh and no longer distressed from her injuries or his panic over her health.</p><p>It was almost like everything had been a dream.</p><p>Like Charlie was going to show up and be another awkward duck who looked at Carlisle wearing his civilian clothes in the middle of the hospital like some sort of cryptid that shouldn't' actually exist.</p><p>Covering her mouth Bella held back as sob as Lauren obviously cringed a bit at her own words as well as Bella's reaction to them. It was all happening far too fast. Nothing was going to be the same and Bella could feel the turn of the earth going a million billion miles as they all hurdled through space and Charlie was still screaming in agony in her cottage.</p><p>"Well, I mean if you want good news..." Lauren trailed obviously unsure as she glanced between Carlisle and Bella as the Vampire had laid his hand on the brunette's knee in a display of combined support as well as strength while the visitor sort of just bubbled,</p><p>"Jessica is being suspended until January..."</p><p>It almost seemed trivial but Bella knew that this was important. After all, people would think that Bella might blame Jessica. Logically it would be easy to say that the Swans wouldn't' have been in the accident if Jessica hadn't hurt her and Charlie wasn't forced to pick up his concussed daughter early. At least, that's how the people of Forks might see it.</p><p>Later the school would ask if Bella was planning on pressing charges but how could she? There was no money for that and asking Carlisle to stand with her in a trial would be too much. It might go on the news since the attack had caused a chain reaction that led to the death of the Chief of Police.</p><p>They couldn't, even if Bella wanted to and it hurt like dying all over again.</p><p>Lauren's visit ended up being rather succinct and that was fine. They barely knew each other and the other girl likely just wanted to be sure Bella was actually alright after that awful display in the principle's office. Most people had never seen a concussion and it was a disturbing sight.</p><p>Her only other visitor came early in the morning during the time Carlisle had been pretending to sleep in his chair. Bella was watching him in quiet amusement as she'd just been woken up for the last time for her concussion by Nurse Hannady.</p><p>The Vampire's ocher eyes flew opened before he sat up swiftly, completely alert and shedding his act. Bella was about to ask who was coming but didn't have to when her door slowly slid opened just as Leah Clearwater peaked into the room.</p><p>"Oh, good. You're awake," Leah trundled in without ceremony, casting Carlisle a wry look as she herself plopped herself on the edge of Bella's bed,</p><p>"How's your head? It can't be any worse than before right?"</p><p>The laugh that attempted to force it's way out had Bella snorting harshly, painfully as it rocked her shoulders. Carlisle stood up, his cool hands found a place on her shoulders as he spared Leah a glance,</p><p>"Please, she's recovering from smoke inhalation and laughing isn't going to do all the bruising she has any good either."</p><p>"Sorry," Leah replied but didn't actually seem like she was, probably because Carlisle was the one scolding her.</p><p>Damn.</p><p>Nobody liked him these days it seemed.</p><p>There was a bit of a pause as Bella assured her Mate that she was fine and he once more took his place in the chair he'd hardly vacated. Once he was situated again Leah huffed out a ragged breath,</p><p>"Yeah, alright. So... I'm really glad you're alright but I was kind of... I was kind of wondering if I can stay at your place."</p><p>That.</p><p>That was not what Bella had been expecting at all. The absolute shock which rolled through her was like an exploding volcano which had irrupted with such a force that only a crater was left where the mountain had once stood.</p><p>"Why?" Bella rasped the syllable out as her confusion continued to roll through her like a bowling ball which gravity had no dominion over.</p><p>"Why she says," Leah groaned as she pressed her palms into her eyes like she'd been through hell and back, which, yeah alright she'd probably had if Charlie ended up safely ensconced in the cottage to let the Change overtake him,</p><p>"Bella I don't- I don't want to be part of Sam's stupid Pack. I don't want to be in his head all the time where it's Emily central and I have to deal with that because it's destiny or some shit!</p><p>"I don't care. I'm glad he's happy or whatever! What I don't want is to <em>see</em> it! God. Please, I just need to get away for a while and I'm pretty sure you'll need the company.</p><p>"Romeo over here can't exactly move in with you."</p><p>That actually earned a bit of a chuckle from Carlisle as he looked at Bella. The Human girl closed her eyes and really took in what that meant.</p><p>Yeah.</p><p>Oh God.</p><p>The house was probably her's now.</p><p>Shoving it all aside Bella grabbed Carlisle's hand to barrow a bit of his steadiness as she nodded lightly her voice still weak but her words confident, "Yeah... Leah it's fine as long as the Pack doesn't think we're kidnapping you or something."</p><p>"Doesn't matter," Leah shook her head and Bella was struck by the fact that she hadn't noticed her friend's hair had been shorn like all the others. The obsidian locks which had once cascaded down Leah's back were nearly as short as Alice's pixie cut,</p><p>"I haven't been able to hear them since they tried to kill Charlie and I ran off with Vampire Barbie to stop them."</p><p>"Rosalie," Bella closed her eyes and smiled at the nickname, she kind of hoped that Leah hadn't called the Vampire that to her face, but knowing Leah it was possible.</p><p>"That's fascinating," Carlisle hummed a bit curiously and Bella could see the wheels turning in his mind at the information he'd been presented,</p><p>"I have never known the Pack's connection could break. It always functioned no matter the distance from what I have seen and been told. If only there was a way to determine if you were able to will your own mind to break from the collective through pure determination alone."</p><p>Leah leaned towards Bella and half jokingly said, "Yeah alright, I'm not having Frankenstein over here work on me. I don't care how hot you think he is."</p><p>"He won't do it without your permission," Bella replied easily as Carlisle just ignored them and seemed to dive deeper into his own head.</p><p>"He's not going to ask for blood for a freaky experiment is he?" Leah frowned and Bella really had no idea what to say to that. So she just shrugged a bit, after all, she'd never really seen the scientific side of him, the one that obviously thirsted for knowledge....</p><p>Well, maybe she did know what to say, "Yeah.. maybe. But don't worry, I'll make sure he doesn't drink it or anything."</p><p>And that was that until Bella was ready to actually deal with the fact that her life was falling down around her ears. She'd dealt with enough in the last 24 hours. That could wait.</p><p>What couldn't wait was the fact that Renee and Phil had both arrived to pick Bella up at check out time.</p><p>The woman had her hands on her hips as her Husband stood by her like a pillar of quiet support while Renee demanded with steel in her voice,</p><p>"That's my daughter, I don't care if she's asked for the President to take her home. I'm driving her and that's it."</p><p>They were earning so many looks Bella was close to just getting up out of her wheelchair and running out the door, booking a taxi and taking that back home.</p><p>"I'm simply asking if you have room for Isabella's crutches," Carlisle replied lightly, fully in Dr. Cullen mode as he lifted the apparatus in question. The man clearly didn't care who was driving his Mate home as his instincts to encompass her fully within his own safety net had subsided through the night,</p><p>"She'll need at least the right one. Her leg on that side has suffered a severe muscle strain, it is practically a miracle it was not torn."</p><p>"Oh, but you have room in your boat of a Mercedes don't you," Renee's response was dripping with accusation and suddenly Bella never ever wanted to have sex in Carlisle's car. Not that she'd fantasized but any chance of it happening dropped to 0.</p><p>It had been bad enough when Dr. Iris had told her nothing more strenuous than a trip up the stairs for bed and gave a rather burning look as she explicitly said, "That means no sex."</p><p>But the way she'd said it had sounded like the woman thought Carlisle had Bella hanging from a chandelier every night or something equally ludicrous.</p><p>"Mom please," Bella tried not to sound petulant while also attempting to keep her cough drop in her mouth, because this was her life now. Eating cough drops like an old dude sucks on Vitamin C candies because of the smoke she'd inhaled,</p><p>"Leah's making lunch and I really don't want to argue."</p><p>Bella tried really hard not to be bothered by the fact that Phil was nearly staring holes into Carlisle's hand which was rested lightly on Bella's shoulder like it was committing some sort of crime in a church.</p><p>"Carlisle, just follow us there with the crutches. It's fine," Bella knew her mother was just trying to be protective but it was really an inappropriate time and place with everything that was happening.</p><p>Her Mate drew away from her and, with more eagerness than probably necessary, Phil took his place in order to push Bella out of the hospital and towards the rental car.</p><p>Carlisle kept up easily before rather sneakily and defiantly planting as sweet peck on Bella's lips just as he darted away to his own car still carrying the crutches. Then the Doctor rather saucily called back, "I'll see you soon Darling!"</p><p>Bella wished she could scream but then her lungs would probably tear and her cough drop would fall out. So obviously it was a bad idea.</p><p>When their trio arrived at the rental car Bella realized why Renee had been so combative as it was a rather small Ford Focus with 4 doors but barely any trunk space for their luggage, let alone the crutches.</p><p>Really.</p><p>Bella practically fumbled herself into the back seat and tried to fight back the reminder of the last time she was on the road as her mother buckled herself into the front and Phil started up the car.</p><p>"Goodness, does he ever leave you alone?" Renee sighed as if Carlisle was being completely paranoid and overbearing when he'd been the one to relent and allow her mother to drive her home.</p><p>"I almost died," Bella reminded her stiffly, the pain killers she'd been prescribed were the kind that Carlisle tended to shy away from giving her since she drove herself everywhere...</p><p>But there would be no driving for Bella Swan anytime soon. No Sirree, especially since her truck had kicked it.</p><p>The reminder of the fact that it wasn't just an accident but an attempt on Bella's life, had the girl's throat tightening. They'd really been lucky.</p><p>Charlie could have truly been dead.</p><p>Instead he was on his second day of torment.</p><p>Bella still didn't know what the Wolves thought. Carlisle wasn't going to just dump it all on her at once, especially since she was still processing everything. He too was likely scrambling in his head attempting to just sort it all before breaking it to her.</p><p>"You've been dating for two months," Renee scoffed and Bella realized that she was right.</p><p>To the rest of the world Bella and Carlisle had only been seeing each other for two months.</p><p>60 days.</p><p>Bella had to use all the power she could muster not to laugh hysterically at the horrifying reality that only 60 days ago Jasper tried to kill her because he got a bit peckish. Only 2 weeks had passed since Charlie found out and Bella had been married in a Vampire Sex Ritual only a week ago.</p><p>"Yeah well a lot's happened," She ended up sighing instead of actually just losing her whole damn mind in the back seat of the rental car.</p><p>"Well a lot more is going to happen," Renee sort of sounded miffed but had coated it with something like hope or happiness,</p><p>"I mean, Jacksonville is really far and May/December Romances aren't exactly fed by distance."</p><p>Suddenly, Bella was filled with the rather childish urge to throw a tantrum and spit her cough drop straight into her mother's hair.</p><p>She never did like cherry flavor.</p><p>"I'm not going to Jacksonville," gnashing her teeth Bella did her best to command as much authority as she could scrounge up in the current circumstances. She'd negotiated with a Pack of Shape-Shifters and burned a Vampire alive just the day before.</p><p>Fear itself wasn't going to separate her from her family, especially now that Charlie was entering the inner fold,</p><p>"All my friends are here. Leah, Angela, Lauren...."</p><p>"Carlisle," Phil sort of added and Bella wanted to kick his chair. She wasn't sure why she was feeling so angry and violent.</p><p>Perhaps it was because she hadn't nearly died in a Ballet Studio, then again, nearly been tortured and murdered in the forest, just to be taken across the country to never again see the people she'd risked her life protecting.</p><p>Carlisle would no doubt keep in contact with her if she did, but Leah and Angela didn't love her yet. Their relationships were still growing.</p><p>Sure they liked her and the Wolf respected Bella, and that was a sturdy foundation, but that wasn't love.</p><p>Love weathered everything.</p><p>"I'm not worried about him," Bella replied easily, and she knew they thought she was being a naive little girl. Maybe she was.</p><p>Maybe love made her stupid.</p><p>"Leah's dad just had a heart attack and Angela.. Angela's still going through stuff. Lauren too. I can't just leave them.</p><p>"They need me."</p><p>"And you need your mother," Phil replied and he sounded like he was trying to be wise and strong but Bella had heard Jasper and Alice speak on fate and suffering, she'd seen Carlisle hold back entire typhoons with only his shoulders.</p><p>"I needed Charlie," Bella felt vicious as she said the words, poison practically dripping from her teeth,</p><p>"And now I need my friends. You can't make me go. I'll visit you but you can't make me go back with you."</p><p>She was 18.</p><p>It was the same reason Charlie couldn't call the police when Carlisle had taken off with her to Alaska. Bella was a legal adult.</p><p>"We'll talk about this later," Renee sighed sounding exhausted and Bella knew that she probably was. Her ex-husband had just 'died' and her daughter was being brat refusing to see 'reason'.</p><p>"Fine, but Carlisle's going to be there," Bella informed her and the atmosphere of the car chilled exponentially.</p><p>Fortunately, the cold had stopped bothering her a long time ago.</p><p> </p><hr/><p> </p><p>This was the arrangement.</p><p>Leah was sleeping in Bella's room, which meant Bella was sleeping in Charlie's room. It was comforting in an odd way to have his things and his clothes around her. She knew he was still alive, still out there becoming something a bit less fragile and slightly more permanent.</p><p>Still though it wasn't like Bella could see proof of it for a very long time, so Charlie was in a state of death and rebirth that she was having a hard time quantifying.</p><p>On one hand they'd have forever.</p><p>On the other, Bella was mourning all the life and moments they should have made together and now couldn't because he was no longer part of the Human world.</p><p>Because of her rather odd mental conundrum of Charlie's upcoming second chance at life, Bella was a bit too glad to be sleeping in his bed to feel near to him.</p><p>The fact that she was sleeping in his bed made it a lot easier not to get turned on when Carlisle laid with her and splayed his cool hands on her stomach in the dead of night. They had a ban on sex after all, and sharing each other in her father's bed while he was being ripped apart and put back together would probably reserve a very special place in hell for the both of them.</p><p>Another strange new thing was Carlisle arriving nearly every evening through the front door.</p><p>Like a normal person.</p><p>Leah had taken to staring at him like he was an apparition but Bella just ignored it as he always arrived just before dinner and left them alone as he made himself comfortable in Charlie's room.</p><p>"He freaks me out," Leah informed Bella on that first Sunday while they were eating a cottage pie which had been made in a joint effort with Esme's recipe,</p><p>"Like... I know he's a Vampire, but like the idea of him just being in the house. Awake. Watching you sleep and breathe just because he can is creepy as fuck."</p><p>It was a combination of Leah's sincerity and the fact that Carlisle could still hear her that Bella smothered her laughter as best as she could manage,</p><p>"Leah, it's just more comfortable for me. I mean he doesn't have to anymore, but it's really assuring to wake up and have him there. I mean.... If you had someone you loved I'm sure you would want them by you when you were sleeping, even if they couldn't."</p><p>Leah sighed but nodded as if she actually got it just a little, "Still... It's weird and the fact that you and him are all stuck together like Sam and Emily is-"</p><p>The Shape-Shifter shuddered a bit instead of actually saying anything and Bella knew they were bound to have this conversation eventually but was glad it was happening sooner rather than later. Bella barely had any details on what the Quileutes were actually thinking regarding the whole thing since no one but Leah had spoken to her and said girl was just as out of the loop as Bella herself.</p><p>"I'm not stuck... I'm happy Leah," Bella assured her friend turned housemate, "I don't feel stuck or trapped. I've decided that he's my home now and I'm his."</p><p>"Yeah but that's the reason I don't mind," Leah sighed a bit and it sounded like a child who'd been told that they could not go out, because it was too wet and muddy from the rain just earlier that day,</p><p>"I get it. You got to say '<em>Hell yeah I'm gonna marry a Vampire'</em>. Sam and Emily didn't get a choice but everyone acts like they're so much better than you."</p><p>Leah's skin was beginning to flush and Bella could feel her own heart begin racing.</p><p>Carlisle had accepted the Quileute girl in Bella's house so long as Leah spent most of her day on the reservation helping her father. The older girl was still a young Shape-Shifter and had little control over her ability and temper. The window they were alone was always tiny as Carlisle always showed up right when they were making dinner and when he had a late shift, one or two of the kids always made an appearance in his stead.</p><p>"It's just different," Bella tried to sound soothing but Leah sneered at that, Her teeth nearly bared,</p><p>"Except the whole reason we're in this mess is because they can't get it through their heads that having a choice makes a whole world of difference!"</p><p>Carlisle appeared at the base of the stairs and Leah turned to him and grit her teeth, "What the hell do you want?!"</p><p>"I am simply ensuring everything is alright," the Vampire replied calmly, "I heard yelling and grew concerned."</p><p>Leah slammed her hand on the table then as turned away as if even more pissed off, "Yeah whatever. I'm not gonna hurt your girlfriend.</p><p>"Bella's fine, it's not her I'm angry at."</p><p>"Who are you angry at?" Bella tried to make the question delicate but she was already getting tired and it may have not sounded as kind as she wished for it to. Nevertheless, Leah replied in a defeated manner,</p><p>"Myself maybe?! How am I supposed to be with someone? What if I start liking someone but we can't be together because I didn't imprint?!</p><p>"What if I never Imprint and I wasted all my time worrying?!</p><p>Oh.</p><p>Oh, Leah...</p><p>"I..." Carlisle was the one to surprisingly make a go at it,</p><p>"I have found that a life of mortality is too short not to take risks. Even immortals have allowed fear to hold them back from going out and experiencing life.</p><p>"Leah it does not do to borrow trouble that may never even arrive."</p><p>The Shape-Shifter shook her head in violent protest to the words, "I can't do that! I can't be the person that Sam was. Taking that risk to be with someone isn't worth hurting them later if I <em>do</em> Imprint.</p><p>"I never want to hurt her, she's too good."</p><p>Bella reached out her good hand and took Leah's in it, attempting to convey as much strength and encouragement that she could manage into that ity bitty gesture,</p><p>"Leah, don't you think you should at least try to talk to her again first? To see if your heart really doesn't want to take that risk? I mean..."</p><p>"You're still young," Carlisle continued easily, "Not every match is born in the same time or place. I have waited and I have been rewarded but not everyone is.</p><p>"Do you really want to risk living a life of regret simply because it won't be perfect? Because nothing ever is Leah.</p><p>"Even our Bonds are simple suggestions, our hearts telling us that this person is the one in all of time and distance that would be worth the struggle, and would put in an equal fight for a life of happiness together.</p><p>"Yes, there is a magic to it, but I believe there is a magic to all love. Even the mortal kind."</p><p>Leah's chocolate colored eyes shifted between them for a moment. There was a heavy silence.. Then, suddenly the dark skinned girl groaned,</p><p>"Yeesh, alright I'll do it, I mean talk to them... Maybe after Charlie's funeral."</p><p>She paused then narrowed her eyes at Bella but there wasn't really any heat to it, "God the two of you are terrifying together. I have no idea what you do to Dr. Doctor's hell spawn but you scare the hell out of me!"</p><p>That managed to yank a surprised laugh out of Bella but it was harsh from the strain of having talked so much. Softly, Carlisle rushed over to Bella in order to run a soothing hand up and down her back but said nothing on the matter. Bella knew it was time to simply eat in silence before heading to bed.</p><p>She needed rest.</p><p>Carlisle gave it to her once Bella was done eating as he did not give a care for Leah's eyes on them. The Vampire lifted his Mate rather skillfully and Bella didn't even complain as Carlisle carried her up the stairs into Charlie's room where they would lay until morning came.</p><p>Morning brought the Monday which followed the actual disaster. It was also apparently when Renee decided 'Later' was.</p><p>Bella's mother had been staying in a hotel with Phil since the house was far too small to contain them all and there was no way Renee and her husband were going to be setting up camp in the living room.</p><p>So on the day they decided to come over and try to talk Bella out of staying in Forks, it was a nightmare which Leah had a front row seat to as the Shape-Shifter sort of spooned raviolis into her mouth like popcorn while Renee stared Carlisle down as if he were Hades and the woman was Demeter demanding the return of her daughter for Spring.</p><p>Phil was once again staring at Carlisle's hand as it gently cradled Bella's hip where she was tucked into him on the couch. The position was a common one the couple took during family meetings and it apparently offended her step-father's delicate sensibilities that a man older than him was holding Bella in such an intimate manner.</p><p>If only he knew.</p><p>Renee was settled on the love seat appearing far from comfortable in their stand off while her husband had an arm around her shoulders against the cushioned backing. Leah was pretending she couldn't hear from her place in the kitchen sitting on the counter shoveling her entire pot of pasta into her mouth like it was going out of style. The entire scenario was obviously more entertaining to her than Sunday night football was to the combined force of Billy and Charlie.</p><p>"You can't live off Charlie's life insurance forever," Renee was so close to shouting it was a bit embarrassing as Carlisle was slowly slipping into his stone faced immovable state of calm as the woman practically scolded,</p><p>"It's not healthy to live here alone!"</p><p>"Leah's here too," Bella reminded her as the girl in the kitchen took another spoonful into her mouth. Likely so she wouldn't say anything inflammatory about the lack of Renee's presence in the Human girl's life in the first place,</p><p>"You should be glad I'm not just moving in with Carlisle."</p><p>That got Leah to make a noise so close to choking that Phil and Renee winced a bit as Bella herself pat Carlisle's arm prompting him to call out a bit facetiously,</p><p>"Miss Clearwater please eat slowly, I don't want to turn the kitchen into an Emergency Treatment Center."</p><p>Leah let out a too loud, "I'm good!"</p><p>Which sounded so close to a laugh Bella mentally had to will herself to stay present within the conversation they were having and not go insane.</p><p>The group in the living room carried on.</p><p>"And I'm not going to live off of Charlie's life insurance. Just give me a chance to figure things out alright?" Bella shuddered and absolutely hated that Renee wanted to do this right now.</p><p>Charlie's heart had apparently stopped the day before some time during the afternoon and Renee was pressuring Bella to figure out what to do so she could stay in Forks. The woman clearly didn't realize that pushing would just have her daughter moving in with her supposed boyfriend of 2 months.</p><p>Because Renee sort of choked as Phil inhaled sharply. The woman narrowed her eyes at Carlisle in a way only Renee could,</p><p>"You invited her to move in with you?!"</p><p>"I wasn't aware if Charlie had owned the house or was still paying the mortgage," Carlisle admitted with complete and utter candor,</p><p>"Even now I have left the option available, after all, Isabella still needs to finish her senior year and attaining a job to supplement her funds might prove difficult."</p><p>"Selling the house would give me some money to pay for an apartment with but I don't want to sell it," Bella admitted, because this house could be kept and maintained.</p><p>At least until Charlie decided what <em>he</em> wanted to do with it. According to Bella's mind, this house was only borrowed at the moment.</p><p>"I don't get why you can't just come to Jacksonville and figure this all out there!" Renee truly sounded as if she didn't understand that Bella knew that her mother was attempting to get her away from Forks to 'save' her from Carlisle's clutches or whatever.</p><p>It was weird.</p><p>Like Carlisle's clear affection and support of Bella had terrified her into disapproval. Really, what was Renee expecting? Bella had long stopped trying to understand her mother and now it was really starting to nip her in the ankles like a rabid Chihuahua.</p><p>"Perhaps you and Leah should go," Carlisle declared suddenly and Bella experienced a star being born between them,</p><p>"You still have the tickets for two. Perhaps if you take Leah, the two of you can take some time away from it all while the funeral is arranged."</p><p>"I've already missed too much school," Bella reminded him which caused Carlisle to hum in agreement at that, as if he'd nearly forgotten that they'd runaway to Alaska for a week. Honestly Bella was beginning to think he was sick and tired of the fact that she was still in school. Which, to be fair, Bella was completely over having to go to high school to get her stupid diploma and go to college.</p><p>"Perhaps after the funeral, you two can go during Christmas Break. My own family will be in Alaska then and..."</p><p>Carlisle trailed off and Bella realized that she wouldn't be able to go because Charlie would still be a Newborn at that point.</p><p>"I get it," Bella nodded reassuringly and let out a sigh as her lungs began aching from all the talking,</p><p>"We'll do that."</p><p>"And how are you going to take care of yourself until then?" Renee demanded urgently, obviously unsatisfied with the arrangements which were made without her consent even though she could have interrupted at any time.</p><p>"Mrs. Dwyer, Isabella's father just died," Carlisle reminded her stonily and it was truly ice cold when he informed the woman, "There is no shortage of people who love him and will not hesitate to allow her to rely on them."</p><p>Renee's expression clearly informed them that she didn't agree one bit with that sentiment as she folded her arms,</p><p>"She shouldn't have to rely on strangers."</p><p>"They're not strangers," Bella grit her teeth because, despite the rockiness of their current circumstance, Billy and Harry were more family to her and Charlie than her Higginbotham cousins,</p><p>"Billy and Harry are practically like uncles to me."</p><p>A pair of overprotective anti-Vampire Husband uncles. Ones who apparently were gritting their teeth and bearing it over her now Vampire Dad.</p><p>God.</p><p>She still hadn't talked to them save for a quick call from Billy saying he'd take care of the funeral arrangements so that she wouldn't have to. It was going to be a real mess and then some when she saw the two men again.</p><p>That obviously wasn't what Renee had been wanting to hear, but as much as it tugged as Bella's heart, the girl knew she could never give her mother the words that she desired. Carlisle then decided the conversation was over and Bella was happy to oblige as her Mate declared,</p><p>"That's enough stress for Isabella today. Her brain is still recovering and she shouldn't be doing anything mentally strenuous."</p><p>Pursing her lips together Renee let it go.</p><p>After all, what was she supposed to day to a Doctor?</p><p>Phil who hadn't even spoken still kept staring at Carlisle's hand on Bella's hip.</p><p>Carlisle moved his fingers a bit more heatedly than was warranted as if daring the other man to say something about the claim he'd so thoroughly staked into Bella's life.</p><p>Distantly Bella hoped Leah hadn't eaten all the ravioli.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>NEXT.. Next is the Epilogue</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0031"><h2>31. Epilogue</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>"Do not stand at my grave and weep, I am not there, I do not sleep......Do not stand at my grave and cry, I am not there, I do not die."</p><p>-[Mary Elizabeth Fry]</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>On an ice cold December morning, Bella stood in a comfortable yet formal black dress with 3/4 sleeves the skirt of which fell just above her ankles.</p><p>The living room had been decorated by Leah and Sue the night prior. White lilies and tulips were bunched in several small vases around the home. In the living room though, the low table had been set up as a small display for a wreath, the center of which contained a photo of Charlie in full Police regalia.</p><p>Sitting before it on a red silk cushion was a marble colored urn and Bella did her best not to stare at it from her place by the stairs leaning into Carlisle. The Vampire had his cool hand resting securely on her waist, perfectly aware that he was practically the only thing supporting her.</p><p>He would have looked handsome in his 3 piece black suite and tie if Bella wasn't so exhausted from everything that seemed to just keep happening like the universe's most sadistic set up of dominoes.</p><p>The rest of the Cullens mingled about with the other guests. Half of them Bella hadn't even recognized as they each came up to introduce themselves and give their condolences while sort of doing their best to act like Carlisle wasn't the only thing preventing her from collapsing under the weight of everything.</p><p>Several officers had been unable to hold back their tears as they payed their respects to her and her Mate had even had to break up what was nearly as scene when the man who had taken Charlie's place, Chief Jenkins, had jabbed his finger into Carlisle's face and demanded he do right by Bella nearly belligerently.</p><p>Carlisle of course made his due promises and turned the man out as swiftly and politely as he could manage while Bella rather childishly clung to the Doctor like a starfish.</p><p>That was only the beginning though as a couple of the more bold officers kept glancing their way a with something a bit sharper than sympathy and pity. Phil, being someone Bella actually knew, was the hardest to bear though as Renee hung on his arm. Bella's step father practically scolding them from across the room as he pressed his lips together but said nothing in clear frustration at her refusal to leave Carlisle's side.</p><p>Bella didn't care how it looked.</p><p>If she stooped touching him she was pretty sure she'd just break down into a mess and that wasn't for anyone to see but Carlisle.</p><p>Billy had been rolled in earlier by Jacob only for the boy to cast Bella a heavy glance before assuring his father he'd pick him up when called, then proceeding to simply march out of the house like he cared nothing for the affair.</p><p>The man had acknowledged Carlisle but only gave his condolences to Bella before setting himself up next to the wreath and cheersing his lemonade to Charlie's photo. He kept his own company as the Officers knew him but could not claim such a thorough knowledge of Chief Swan as Billy could.</p><p>Head of the Quileute Council, Billy had grown from a boy with Charlie Swan and there were days in him that only the two of them and Harry had seen. Lives lived in tandem like siblings of the soul.</p><p>Harry arrived a bit slowly and much later than Billy. As the Clearwater patriarch was still recovering from his bypass, but it had made a statement when the man ambled up to Bella and Carlisle, using a walking stick for support, before putting a hand out to Carlisle first and declaring at a strong tone,</p><p>"In these trying times, it is good that Bella has someone to support her. I'm sure Charlie would be glad to know your family has been carrying her through this."</p><p>"Thank you Mr. Clearwater," Carlisle had taken the proffered hand and Bella swallowed hard at the bold display Harry had made. Standing powerful for Leah who was rather stalwartly manning the lemonade and occasionally sending her brother as a runner to refill Bella's own glass.</p><p>"Harry."</p><p>"Harry," Carlisle nodded and Sue aided her husband towards a chair for him to pass the time in a restful way.</p><p>It was such a show of support in it's gentle easiness that there was a clear shift to the atmosphere of the memorial being held within the rather small home. Harry was not ecstatic or doing back flips over the circumstances.</p><p>But his greatest objection had been Charlie's broken heart. The suffering of a dear friend who could never be told what Bella was truly doing and would eventually lose his daughter to a life he did not view a truly living.</p><p>Things had changed though.</p><p>Hadn't they?</p><p>Oh how things had changed and Harry's respect for Carlisle's ability to set aside the prejudice of the tribe had set in motion something slow.</p><p>Like a trickling river which would one day carve a canyon while it worked in tandem with the fact that Charlie was in Alaska, speaking and experiencing new things everyday while the world he knew mourned him.</p><p>Harry didn't have to mourn him though, that friend who used to fish with him was still just one phone call away if he truly wished him to be.</p><p>There was a crack forming in the minds of the Quileutes on the matter of it all.</p><p>After giving Bella her dues, Harry joined his friend in the living room next to the wreath there was a curious hum as all eyes and ears honed in on the two men who were Charlie's best friends.</p><p>There were people milling about that Bella would rather not have invited but the Newtons loved Charlie and so they had brought Mike who had the sense not to bring Jessica.</p><p>There were also people Bella was glad to see such as Lauren, who had arrived at Bella's personal invite and the girl was with Tyler. The brunette girl tried her best not to smile softly at the sight of them holding hands as Tyler very softly kissed the top of the blonde girl's head. In the end Bella had to hide her reaction by sipping on her drink.</p><p>Forks would be humming with chatter about it all the following morning. Bella was 100% sure of that as Leah was relieved of her duties at the punch table by Sue and the Shape-Shifter trudged a clear path to Bella without a care for all the glances.</p><p>"Did you invite Angela?" Leah whispered as she arrived at Bella's left hand which was no longer wrapped as her stitches had been removed.</p><p>"She'll come," Bella replied softly, gently as she knew Angela's father was still uneasy about his daughter associating with a local seductress. It would have been funny if Leah's chances of finding a sliver of happiness in her own mess of life didn't hinge on the other girl arriving.</p><p>Especially since Leah was still living in Bella's house.</p><p>"Her father isn't going to keep her from attending a memorial," the Human girl reasoned as she allowed herself to clutch a little tighter at Carlisle's coat where her hand was resting on his back.</p><p>Bella leaned her head into his chest a bit as Leah sort of nibbled on her thumb a tad nervously at the waiting ordeal. Realizing her friend was probably about to start emitting sonic waves with the amount she was vibrating Bella muttered lowly, knowing Leah's supernatural hearing would pick it up,</p><p>"Y'know... With Jessica being suspended, Angela's going to be a shoe in for Valedictorian."</p><p>She was already practically everyone's prediction for Salutatorian, after all.</p><p>Angela had done her best to give Bella support in the trial of Charlie's death, but her own Parent's disapproval of the whole situation with Carlisle kind of limited her abilities to be on hand. It was difficult all around really.</p><p>Leah deserved a bit of happiness though and Bella was ready to start praying for it if she had to.</p><p>"This is stupid, I shouldn't do it," Leah hissed and with her hand that wasn't in danger of being gnawed off she began clutching at the skirts of her own dress which was navy blue,</p><p>"I don't know why I let you two assholes talk me into this."</p><p>"We simply provided our opinions. You are the one who decided on your course," Carlisle piped in unwilling to be accused of any crimes he had not committed which only earned him a bit of a glare from Leah.</p><p>As if she wasn't nervous enough, Edward's copper head began practically dancing through the small lake of people as he marched towards the trio with more eagerness than Bella believed was acceptable at a Memorial but she forced it away as her son had the decency to whisper,</p><p>"Has it happened yet?"</p><p>"Has what happened yet?" Bella pursed her lips Carlisle let out a bit of a noise that made her want to shake him and demand to know what he'd just figured out as Edward replied calmly,</p><p>"Nothing... You'll see."</p><p>"That's not ominous at all," the Human girl sighed into her cup and found that it was nearly only ice, so she rather unceremoniously shoved her glass in the telepath's direction,</p><p>"Edward, can you get me more lemonade?"</p><p>"Of course, more Ice too?," Edward smiled softly, once Bella had vetoed the Ice, the Vampire boy took her glass and ran it over to Sue as quickly as he could manage to get away with while anyone who ever saw Charlie more than once a week watched curiously. Because the Cullens were always a curiosity wherever they went.</p><p>"Do you need to sit down? We've been standing quite a while," Carlisle ran his hand very gently up her side in a gesture of comfort and Bella turned her attention up to him as she sighed,</p><p>"Yeah, I do think I'm starting to get a bit tired but, I don't actually  want to move from here."</p><p>"Jasper can get you a chair."</p><p>The empath did indeed arrive with a chair for both his parents a little after Edward returned with her lemonade. Both boys decided to apparently pitch their tents quietly behind the sitting couple. Leah was sort of shifting nervously still in her place at Bella's left hand as if she was expecting a ravenous beast to burst through the door at any moment while the Vampire boys did the equivalent of wiggle excitedly.</p><p>Which meant they were sort of standing stock still, nearly replicating statues if not for the fact that they were still pretending to breath so as not to draw attention to their obviously ridiculous behavior.</p><p>Alice couldn't exactly see past Leah completely, the prescient Vampire had decided to take a bit of time to attune to her and was able to see the Shape-Shifter's long set plans. Nothing small, just the ones Leah had made and scheduled for herself firmly days in advanced, even then the Visions were vague and a bit hazy.</p><p>So the fact that Edward and Jasper were practically munching on pop corn and hopping up an down in excitement over something meant that if Alice had seen it, then it was something a long time coming. What didn't help was that it was the two of them and not Alice eager to see it happen.</p><p>Emmett wasn't even with them so he apparently didn't find it interesting enough to mosey over and get his own look at whatever spectacle was about to unfold.</p><p>There.</p><p>In Bella's house during Charlie's Memorial Service.</p><p>God they were all treating this like some sort of depressing formal party but Bella couldn't blame them, they'd literally be seeing the guy in a week during Christmas Vacation.</p><p>Later.</p><p>Much later Bella would be able to laugh at the absurdity of it all and the fact that Emmett was apparently recording the reception area for Charlie to watch back later.</p><p>She'd be able to appreciate the humor in it all when Charlie nervously sort of shuffled closer to her doing his best not to move or breathe while Carlisle hovered ready to pounce at any moment with their army of children equally poised for an extraction of the Human girl.</p><p>In that very moment though, Bella had to hiss under her breath, "You guys are making me nervous cut it out, this is my dad's funeral."</p><p>"Sorry," Jasper whispered politely while Edwards just sort of sighed his own apology as if he was reluctant to make it but did so anyways.</p><p>With them acting a bit less like the four horsemen of the Apocalypse were about to throw down in her living room, Bella twined her finger's with Carlisle's and asked Jasper for another lemonade while Edward teased him because he'd gotten it last time. Leah was casting glances at the door like it would explode but that was her prerogative and Bella wasn't going to boss her own friend around.</p><p>The boys suspicious behavior suddenly clicked as Jasper returned with her refill and the door opened to admit an extremely late straggler into the Swan home.</p><p>Bella drew in a deep inhale ready to interact once more with a griever as the entry way was filled with the form of Angela Webber in a rather formless as well as formal black dress with her hair tied back in a tight bun. She wore a pair of pearl earrings and Bella was about to greet her but something stopped her.</p><p>A gasp.</p><p>Or a sigh.</p><p>Maybe even a whisper came out of Leah as her entire world shifted.</p><p>And a brand new universe was born.</p><p>"Um..." Leah's tone was near choked off as Angela appeared equally rocked, a sequence of events which had Bella biting the goddamned bullet as she registered what was happening.</p><p>"I can't-!" Bella suddenly choked out forcefully before pulling away from Carlisle with a bit of an apology in her eyes, she then bolted to her feet and ran upstairs like hell was on her heels, face in her hands doing her best to make horrific sounds of weeping.</p><p>Immediately Carlisle was after her, but so were Angela and Leah.</p><p>And really she didn't mind looking like she was having a breakdown if it meant the two girls got away from the party.</p><p>Carlisle was clearly lost as Bella forced her way into Charlie's room before heaving a great big breath. The Vampire wrapped his arms around her, prepared to offer anything,</p><p>"Darling, what's the matter? What's happened?"</p><p>Leah and Angela kind of just shuffled in after him and Bella heaved out the most mixed laugh she'd ever managed as she cupped Carlisle's face with her hands as she assured her mate softly,</p><p>"I'm fine. I just.. It was for them."</p><p>Carlisle turned away slightly to see the two girls who had pursued them into Charlie's room and his entire body relaxed completely the moment he realized that Leah and Angela were holding hands as if some great force was about to crash through the town and pry them apart.</p><p>The two girls wouldn't let go of each other for a very long time either.</p><p>Imprinting was a choiceless thing after all.</p><p> </p><hr/><p> </p><p>"Have you packed your sunscreen?"</p><p>Bella covered her mouth as the words rang in her ears like a song. Carlisle kissed her temple as she was sitting across his lap on the couch and leaning into him for support while Bella closed her eyes and let the voice coming through her phone wash over her like gentle calloused hand ruffling her hair.</p><p>Charlie's voice was different, yet he sounded the same. Something about it was more comforting, more warm like melted brown sugar as he teased,</p><p>"Cause I don't want to get pictures of you just to realize you'd turned into a lobster."</p><p>"Yeah," Bella tried to sound calm but the overwhelming love and happiness which was surging through her like a 1000 volt current. It was nearly too much, yet not enough and she was forced to swallow it all down or else she'd cry right then and there,</p><p>"I've packed it, even the one for my face. Everything's packed, I've triple checked it..."</p><p>There was a pause as both of them didn't know what to say.</p><p>Every wall that there ever was between them had been broken down, obliterated into dust which had blown away on the lightest of breezes. Yet, the distance which resulted was far greater than the physical span between Washington and Alaska.</p><p>"How are you holding up?" Bella managed to force out as she leaned her forehead into Carlisle's chest, inhaling his scent to get herself calmed,</p><p>"Are you... Are you enjoying Alaska? It's a beautiful house and I hear the forests are even better."</p><p>"It's... Hell Bella it's really different I don't.." Charlie sighed and it was clear he really had no clue how to describe it, how his world had so suddenly changed and how he'd discovered his daughter was even more of a stranger than he'd realized,</p><p>"It's a nice place though. Irina's taken me through some of the trails and I'm.. I'm looking forwards to seeing the village. That might be a while though...</p><p>"I'm still..."</p><p>"Yeah," Bella sighed as he trailed off, not willing to say Blood Thirsty, scared to say he was still having trouble with keeping himself under control,</p><p>"Carlisle says the first 6-8 months will be the hardest, but look at the Cullens. They're able to go to school.</p><p>"Go shopping. It just take practice."</p><p>A noise came out of him then and Bella wondered what it meant because it was a newer sound she'd never heard before as Charlie replied,</p><p>"Let's talk about something else... How's.. How's Carlisle treating you you're still at home right?"</p><p>"Yeah," Bella let out a chuckle at his over protectiveness, "Leah and I packed up a bunch of your stuff... Rosalie's promised to get them all washed for you so that you can have some of your old clothes.</p><p>"I'm keeping your work jacket though. I've been wearing it to school."</p><p>"You probably look good in it," Charlie laughed but it was wet and drenched in sorrow, no doubt his eyes were shining with tears which would never fall again.</p><p>"And Carlisle is still a perfect gentlemen. Tells me he loves me everyday," it was the only thing she could think to say as Bella was overwhelmed once more,</p><p>"I love you dad. You know that right? That even if you make a mistake, I'll love you. That you're my daddy and you always will be no matter how different you may feel inside.</p><p>"How strange you might think you've become. I'll always be your daughter."</p><p>"Thank you," a sob wracked through him audibly as Charlie choked out the words like a prayer,</p><p>"I love you too, and I needed that today. I really needed to hear you say that today."</p><p>Carlisle very quietly began to wipe away the tears which were beginning to sting at the corners of Bella's eyes as she attempted to keep her breathing steady. Really though, she knew it was a futile effort, Charlie could probably hear her heart and even Carlisle touching her through the phone.</p><p>"Have Billy or Harry called?" Bella asked softly, not wanting to linger on the more desperate emotions they were feeling at the circumstances,</p><p>"I know Leah keeps saying her dad stares at the phone a lot these days."</p><p>"Nah, haven't heard from them," Charlie confessed and there was a hurt there which Bella wished she could heal, "Did get a call from Jacob though.</p><p>"That was... A weird one."</p><p>A laugh rocked through her shaking Bella's shoulders as she looked up, gazing into her lover's eyes as Carlisle stared right back quietly. Keeping his piece so that she may have her conversation with her father but still providing the strength she needed to not break down and sob desperately to see him again.</p><p>"Jacob... He's not like Leah. He doesn't really get it," Bella attempted to explain but really she didn't know how Charlie felt about it all quite yet,</p><p>"You get it though right? I mean.. With Irina. You get it all?"</p><p>It sounded like forgiveness, absolution from her sins, and heaven all at once as Charlie replied, "Yeah.. I'm beginning to see it."</p><p>"I can't wait till I can see you again," Bella informed him with determination and fervor which was beginning to smolder in her bones, rattle the chains which held her into her fragile Human body,</p><p>"However long it takes. I'm gonna see you again alright? It's not always going to be like this."</p><p>"Bells, I don't know if I can take you going through this," his tone was soft and nearly broken as the man let her hear everything he was truly feeling on the matter. All the struggle he'd faced the past few weeks, the pain which had been suffered in those first days,</p><p>"You're my baby and I don't know if I can be OK with that."</p><p>Bella reminded herself that there was still time. Charlie hadn't gotten through the worst of it and he may change his opinion in the next 5 years after he'd lived the life the Denali did. The one they shared with the Cullens. He was bound to have different opinions on immortality then.</p><p>There was no reason to argue.</p><p>If they had anything, they had time.</p><p>"Let's not argue," she inhaled deeply and let it wash over her, into her lungs and veins,</p><p>"I don't want our first talk to be an argument. I'd rather hear your opinions on the fact that Emmett keeps telling everyone he's going to wrestle you since he'd never gotten his hands on a Newborn before. He's the youngest after all."</p><p>Charlie groaned but it was light and had a dash of genuine humor in it, enough to have Carlisle smiling too as Bella bit her lip at the sound of her father complaining,</p><p>"Listen, Eleazar says that I can probably plow through anything right now and I'm not about to try that on a kid."</p><p>"He's 20 so your'e fine," Bella informed him, her heart getting lighter and lighter, "And Carlisle and I have already agreed it's on Emmett's head if you accidentally break him."</p><p>"He'll have few surprises if he tries," Charlie sigh, but it sounded a little smug and that had Bella shifting herself around in Carlisle's lap so that her back was against his chest while her rear sort of rested between his thighs before she demanded a bit giddily,</p><p>"Oh? What's that supposed to mean."</p><p>"I can't tell you, Carlisle's right there and Irina says that Edward will pluck it outta his head if I tell you."</p><p>"Ugh! So you mean I have to wait for Emmett to call me and complain?" she actually managed to chuckle at that, really it was funny to think that her family was going to be reuniting without her. Bella had to squash down the feeling that it was because she wasn't enough yet.</p><p>The universe was telling her she didn't deserve anything good yet.</p><p>Time, it was a blessing the Cullens all wished they had. Charlie too no doubt wished just a little that he'd been Human to see her graduate and get married.</p><p>So that he could give her away that first time.</p><p>Bella promised herself in that moment that she and Carlisle would have a full Vampire Wedding when she'd been Changed and had acclimatized to her new life. Just so that Charlie would have the chance, even if it was the second time. It was still something Bella wished dearly that he could have.</p><p>"Irina... Irina says they call you mom... That I'll have to get used to that," Charlie was sounding uncomfortable and Bella felt a bit bad about it but was also a little proud that he appeared to be willing to face it, trudge through it.</p><p>"They do, I.. I call them my kids too," Bella informed him as gently as she could manage as Carlisle's hands found her belly and Bella had to grab them because she wasn't talking to her friends. This was her father and there was no way Carlisle was going to try and turn her on when Charlie was on the line.</p><p>Carlisle chuckled a little but obeyed the gesture as his hands rested on her hips without any intent whatsoever.</p><p>"Emmett's probably going to try and call you Grandpa."</p><p>That.</p><p>That got Charlie groaning again.</p><p>Fridays eventually became Charlie days.</p><p>Bella would hole herself up in his old room, which she'd begun to slowly move her own stuff into, and call her dad to see how he was doing up in the great white north.</p><p>Someday were fine.</p><p>Other's weren't.</p><p>But Bella repeatedly tried to pry her heart opened and share everything she had hidden.</p><p>It was during those precious calls that Bella told him about James.</p><p>Arizona.</p><p>How Carlisle had saved her from the Venom so that she would have a chance to grow, and Charlie could see her become a woman. Bella told him about the day she Bonded to Carlisle.</p><p>Oh so long ago in that Emergency Room, right before his eyes their hearts had been tied together in a dance which would never end.</p><p>Charlie listened and laughed and cried and scolded her.</p><p>It wasn't perfect.</p><p>Love never was.</p><p>But who knew? They had so much more to experience, with practice it might get pretty damn close.</p><p>When Bella was preparing to board the plan to Jacksonville, and Angela stressed about leaving Leah behind, it didn't feel like scary. Not like it would have if Charlie was truly gone.</p><p>Leah wasn't able to leave Forks quite yet. Her own abilities weren't under enough regulation so Angela was being dragged across the country in the Shape-Shiter's stead. Due to the fact that Angela was an Imprintee, she was permitted to know everything.</p><p>
  <em>Everything.</em>
</p><p>So Bella asked, "Do you think I should call Charlie? One more time before we board?"</p><p>"Just call him when we get there," Angela smiled as if she thought Bella's worry was cute or tooth rottingly endearing,</p><p>"You haven't even called Carlisle more than once but you keep calling Charlie like he's going to disappear."</p><p>"Carlisle's different," Bella admitted easily and it occurred to her then why, "Carlisle is my Husband. He know's I'll be fine and if I'm not he'll feel it.</p><p>"Charlie's my dad though. He's gonna worry no matter what."</p><p>And wasn't that funny?</p><p>To realize that now that everything between them was out and clear to see, that Bella didn't mind him worrying so much.</p><p>That she didn't mind him being her dad, even if it was a bit overbearingly protective.</p><p>That was new.</p><p>He was so much more protective.</p><p>Bella took a breath and let herself accept it.</p><p>He was her dad.</p><p>If they were lucky, and the universe was kind.</p><p>He would be for a very long time.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Thank you all so much for reading this! It's officially my longest fic by MILES and I have plans to write a WHOLE lot more in this universe but slamming out 4-5K and up a day had been so crazy that I'm gonna take a small break.</p><p>It won't be long and I hope to see you all soon!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
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